


Us

by Theblackfangirl



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - High School, Cheating, Childhood Friends, Cliche, Cute, Explicit Sexual Content, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Heavy Angst, Heavy Fluff, Heavy Themes, Hollywood, Levi's POV, Lost Love, Lots of tears, Minor Character Death, Multi, Out of Character, POV Female Character, Pregnancy, Romance, Sexual Violence, Slow Burn, Smut, Some Humor, Substance Abuse, Teenagers, heather musical mentioned, reader is a female, there are other ships I just didn't add them in the tag
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-18
Updated: 2019-04-23
Packaged: 2019-04-24 14:38:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 55
Words: 209,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14357550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theblackfangirl/pseuds/Theblackfangirl
Summary: Having a boy as a best friend is hard. But it's harder when you fall in love with your best friend.A Reader x Levi childhood friends AU





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Special shout out to xXItzSamanthaXx for inspiring me to write this little fic. It was an idea I've had in the back burner of my mind for a while but they asked about me doing a childhood au so I decided to go for it.

I was standing in the mirror singing and dancing to a Beyonce song that I had playing on my phone. It was one of my favorites, and I couldn't help but move whenever it came on. I know I should be doing my homework, but I just can't help it right now. The music moves me!

"Would you shut up?" Levi said throwing a pillow at me. I laughed, but I didn't stop, I just kept singing, but now my attention was on him. I used the brush in my hand at started moving to Levi. 

"I dream it, I work hard, I grind 'til I own it twirl on them haters, I buy no alligators." I sang.

"Wait, F/n." Levi spoke up, "Did you just say you I no buy alligators?" Levi asked looking taken back. 

"That's what she said," I told him.

"The fuck F/n? Albino alligators that's what she said." 

"No, she says I buy no alligators." 

"That doesn't even make sense dumb ass," Levi said again through another pillow at me.

But that time a caught it and rolled my eyes at him. "Why would she have albino alligators? You sound like the dumb ass if you ask me," 

"She's talking about shoes," Levi told me.

I shook my head, "Whatever Levi."

Levi just ignored me going back to his homework.

"Levi," I called out again. But he ignored me again.

Levi!" I yelled this time, then he looked at me, "What?" 

I pointed at him, "When he fuck me good I take his ass to red lobster!" I sang laughing.

"You an idiot F/n get over here and do your damn homework." 

"Levi, I might get your song played on the radio station." I sang getting on his bed next him dancing. "Come on Levi show me you can slay!" 

Levi pushed me away, but I caught a glimpse of the smile that was on his face. "Would you focus this is due tomorrow, and your the one who asked me to help you do it." Levi said.

I stopped dancing and went to turn off my phone, "Sorry Levi, you know I love Bey, and I can't help dance when she comes on." 

"Okay, but is Beyonce going to be the one taking the test Friday?" He snapped back at me.

"You don't have to sound like my mom," I told him rolling my eyes. Levi just clicked his tongue at me. God, I hate it when he does that. "You know you don't have to be such an ass," 

"Tch, I'm not an ass." 

" Says only you and stop clicking your tongue it's annoying," I told him for like the 1,000th time since I've known him.

"It's my tongue I can do with it whatever the hell I want to, Tch." He clicked it again. 

"You do that again I'll bite you." 

"Whatever." 

"Just don't try me," I told him. Levi knew I was serious.

"Don't try me, now if you want help get back over here and work on these problems." 

Ugh, he was right I did really get this done. So I went ahead and got up and moved to lay beside him on his bed again.

"Tch, took you long enough." He said handing me my paper and going back to his own. 

I took a deep breath. "Hey, Levi let me see your arm." 

Levi not paying attention moved his arm in fount of me, and I bit it. Levi snatched away. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" 

I laughed, "I told you if you did that again I was going to bite you." 

"I swear to god F/n," Then before I knew it Levi was on top of me trying to bite me back. 

I did my best to try and push him off me, but when it comes down to is he's a lot bigger than me. So I just decided to yell for help, "Mikasa quick! Help me." 

"She can't help you," Levi told me trying to pull my arm closer to his mouth, but I continued to struggle. 

"Would you get your fat ass off me?" I told him making him stop trying to bite me; he just looked down at me.

"I am not fat." 

"Are too, get off me." 

"Not till you say you're sorry." He teased.

"Never!" 

"Then I'm not moving." 

"Mooovvveee."

"Would you two shut up already." 

Levi and I both stopped and looked at his doorway. 

Mikasa looked at us, "You both are loud, and some of us are trying to get our work done." 

"Why don't you just come in here with us," I asked giggling she looked so annoyed, it was funny.

"And watch you two flirt all night? No thank you." She said with no emotion. 

Levi quickly got off me, and we both moved back from each other at her words. "We were not flirting," I told her. 

"Tch, and we don't flirt," Levi told her.

I groaned inwardly, why does he do that? "Yeah, we're just friends you know that Mikasa." 

Mikasa didn't look convened. She just rolled her eyes and started to walk out, "Mom says you two are just stupid and she doesn't know why you both won't date already." 

Levi and I just sat on his bed, quietly.

"They don't know what they're talking about." He spoke up after a while.

I nodded going along with him, "Yeah, we both know we're just friends. Nothing more, we'll always be this way." 

"Yeah, anything else would be weird." Levi added, "And imagine me dating you? We both know I can do much better." He joked going back to his work. 

I laughed a, "Ha, same here." 

~~Later~~

I can't believe he said he could do better than me! Levi is such an asshole! I was fuming. How dare he? As If I'm so gross and he can't see himself with me.

I was now in my own room laying on my bed in anger. He was so mean, and I don't even think he knows it. 

God, Levi sucks.

I guess that's what happens when you're in love with your best friend. It fucking sucks.That's the only way to describe it, And it doesn't help his mother and sister think we should be together, why can't he? Ugh, and why did Mikasa say that anyway?everything was going fine.

You see Levi and I were friends. Well, best friends. We've known each other since we were like 5 and we were joined at the hip. So we've always been together. We've done everything together, baths, birthdays, first days of school, we were partners in crime, we always been.

So I guess it was natural for me to one-day develop feelings for him. I don't know when it happened. Just one day I was hanging out with him and realized I was in love with him. Then everything was just weird after then. I mean I just feel weird when I'm with him. I do my best to act regularly, and I do alright at it. It's just sad knowing how I feel about him and he'll never feel the same about me. And I know If I tell him the truth I would ruin what we have. And I can't lose my best friend because of stupid teenage hormones. 

So it just sucks, and not to mention it hurts how he could just say stuff like he did earlier. 

He's just mean. 

But he's...still so much more than that. 

I just wish I could tell him the truth.

Just then I heard my phone ringing. I looked over at it and saw it was Levi.

Ugh, what did he want? now

I answered my phone, "What do you want?" 

"You left all your shit over here," He snapped. 

"So bring it to school tomorrow." 

"Just open your fucking window, F/n" 

I groaned, "I don't feel like it I want to go to bed." 

"If you don't get over and open your damn window. I'll throw it in the trash," He yelled again.

Ugh, for as much as I do love him he's annoying as hell. I got up and walked to my window and opened it.

That was another thing. We lived right next door to each other. 

"Here," Levi said throwing me my books to me. 

"Gee, thanks," I said when I started to close my door.

"F/n?" 

I stopped, "What?" 

"What's wrong with you?" He asked me.

Oh, how I would love to just say you, Levi. You are my problem.

"Nothing." 

"What are you PMSing?" He asked. "You shouldn't be, you just ended like two weeks ago." 

See this is how close we were he knew when I was on my fucking period. No way he'd ever see me as anything more than his friend. 

"I'm just tired, Levi, Alright." Then I closed my window on him. It was his comment that put me in a bad mood, I know I shouldn't freak out about it, but sometimes I can't help it. My life would be so much better if I could just tell him the truth and he'd feel the same way, but it's just won't happen. He said it himself. He can do better.

Being in love with your best friend it hard.

Levi Pov

It was morning, and I was waiting for F/n. It was usual for her to take fifty years to get ready in the morning.

"We're taking your car to school." F/n said finally walking out of her house over to me.

"And If I don't feel like driving?" 

"Then we'll take the bus, where is Mikasa?" 

"Tch, she left last night to go with her friends," I answered.

"Oh," She said stretching She must not have gotten enough sleep last night, "but seriously you are driving." she added/ 

"Tch. Fine." 

"Oh my gosh, it's to morning for that such up!" She groaned. 

I ignored her, I don't know what the hell is wrong with her lately. I mean other than the clicking the tongue thing. I know it pisses her off I've always done it out of habit, and I just like annoying her. But it was something else; she didn't even spend the night which she would usually do when she said over long. She didn't want to tell me, but I know something was up. 

"You got your homework right?" I asked her as she got into the car. I know she forgot it at my house last night and being honest F/n isn't that bright when it comes to remembering things.

"I got it." 

"Do you really?" 

F/n groaned, "Hold on." Then she went to get out the car. 

I couldn't help but laugh to myself F/n was hopeless. She was clueless, annoying, loud, goofy, and just downright adorable.

And I was in love with her.

Yeah, I was in love with my best friend, and it sucked like hell. 

F/n wasn't ever going to feel the same way about me. We been friends for most of our lives and changing it up now and telling her the truth about how I feel would just ruin things. And that's the last thing I would ever want to do.

Other then my mother and sister, she's the most important person in my life. 

And if I lost her because of my dumb as shit hormones, then I'd never be able to forgive myself. F/n is just that important to me; I know everything about her, hell I even knew when she was on her period. It was just little things I knew about her that just made me love her more.

F/n got back in my care, "Don't say anything just shut up let's get to school." 

She must have forgotten them. Ha, like I said she's hopeless. I don't know what she would do without me. Hell, I don't even know what I'd do without her. It was something I didn't like to think about too much, but what happens when we both go to college granted we both have the rest of the year but still what if she doesn't go to the same school as me? Then what?

"Hey don't wait for me after school today," F/n spoke up as I was driving to school.

"Why not?"

"Don't worry about it." She said.

"Seriously F/n, what is up with you? Ever since Mikasa came to my room yesterday, you've been in a mood," I told her. It was the truth. When Mikasa said we were flirting she just jumped away from me granted, I did the same, but after that, she just was acting distance. I hope Mikasa making that comment didn't put her in a bad mood, and now she thinks she has to be distance.

But more than likely that's exactly what's going on, which is more reason to never tell her how I feel, because then who knows what she'd do.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She said not saying anything else. Now, this was annoying, F/n was in a mood that much as clear. F/n doesn't get into one of her moods often, but fuck is she irritating when she does. So we stayed in silence usually we would talk, or she would sing off key or something.

I just shook my head; it will be fine. F/n will talk to me when she's ready.

We got to the school, and I was about to tell her how I would see her after class but she had already taken off.

What the fuck? 

"Where is F/n?" I heard someone say I looked behind me to see Furlan and Bella. 

They were to two friends of ours. "She just left." 

"Where's she go?" Bella asked.

"I don't know I'll just see her in class." 

"What's with that stupid look on your face?" Furlan asked.

I rolled my eyes, "Tch, shut up." 

"Levi's in a mood." I heard Bella call herself whispering. 

"I bet both of them are in a mood, that's probably why F/n took off," Furlan said.

"How about the both of you shut up," I snapped at them both. 

"Anyway, are you going to auditions today?" Bella asked me.

"Shit," I said out loud. I forgot that's what I was supposed to be doing last night, but I got distracted by helping F/n. There was a logical college coming and having some of us auditions for their play today, and I was hoping to try out. 

"Sounds like someone won't be trying out." Furlan joked.

"Shut, up," I told them both.

This was just going to be an insane day.

Your Pov

Okay I know I was being a jerk to Levi, but I didn't care that much right now. 

It's just sometimes I can't deal with him, and his little comment he made last night, well, it just really pissed me off.

I was at my locker now; I was just getting my things for class. Usually, I would be doing this with Levi, but I just needed space. Things were just getting complicated the older we got, most of the time I don't even know what to do.

"Oh, it's F/n," I closed my locker to see Erwin standing there.

"Hello, Erwin," I said giving him a smile. 

"Your partner in crime missing," He said looking past me for Levi.

"We both know you two don't get along for whatever reason; you want to tell me why you're looking for him?" I asked him.

Erwin leaned against one of the lockers, "Not him I was looking for. I was looking for you; it's just hard to talk to you when he's hanging around." 

I smirked, "And what can I help you with? I hope it's not homework, because I bearly do my own." 

"Ha, no it was more like a date." 

"A date?" 

"Is he messing with you?" I jumped at Levi's voice.

"Levi." Erwin's voice went flat.

"Erwin." Levi just looked at him with no interest.

They both just stared at each other. No one really understood what it was, but they two never got along. At least when we started high school. Before that they were friends, but something happened, and now it's just so much tension whenever they're in the same room. I've asked Levi about it, but he just brushes me off anytime I bring it up.

"You know what I'll talk to you later F/n," Erwin said. "think about what I said." Then he walked off.

"What did he say to you?" Levi asked me.

I took a breath, "Nothing to important." 

"Goddamn, it F/n are you going to tell me what's up with you or not?" He snapped.

"I told you I'm fine Levi." 

"You can't lie to me and think I don't know, is this about what Mikasa said yesterday because really don't worry about it. Everyone has always thought we go out but it's never been an issue before, we know we're just friends." He said looking away from me.

Oh Levi, how can he just not get it?

Even now, he was taking time to just to talk to me, I mean it's nothing new, but this is one of the things I just love about our relationship. We talk. Levi himself isn't a very open person, and there are very few he talks too openly, and other then me It's just Mikasa and his mother, not even Furlan and Bella know everything about him. And it's just things like this that just make me love him. 

Maybe I should just stop being a jerk.

"Sorry, it's just a lot on my mind with his being a senior year and all," I lied, not like I could tell him the truth.

"Tch, it's fine. Let's just get to class." He said walking away, so I followed him.

"I know what you mean about stressing though, I've feel it too believe it or not," He told me.

"Um, not. We both know you got scholarships lined up for you." I told him.

Levi just looked at me, "Do not, but that reminds I got an audition after school today, so If you are staying after school for something I can still give you a ride home." 

"Oh, that college play thing right?" I asked him, he had mentioned it a while ago. Levi was in the drama club he but his real passion was singing, but he didn't want to join the school choir, he said that was his middle grown. 

"Yeah," He said.

"Oh well, good luck," I told him.

"What are you staying after school for anyway?" 

Oh god, I had lied about that. I just wanted some space from him. "Err I just had to say for-" 

"Morning Levi, see you at tryouts after school?" I was cut off my a girly voice. One that I must say wasn't welcomed.

It was Petra Ral. 

She was just a girl we went to school with that was obsessed with Levi. She was annoying if anything, I mean like she's never done anything to mean to me but the fact that she wanted Levi was enough to make me not like her. And the fact that Levi seemed to like he didn't make anything better.

Levi and I were passing her in the hallway, but he stopped after she spoke to him, "Morning I didn't know you were trying out too." 

"It's heathers, that's like my favorite musical I have to try out," she said. 

I could just die seeing her smile at him.

"Yeah, it's pretty good, are you nervous?" He asked her.

"Hey, Levi I'm going to go ahead to class. Catch up when you're done." I told him. 

Levi just nodded. 

Wow, but I guess I shouldn't be surprised. Why would he leave just because I was leaving? Not like he owned me anything like that.

I sighed, being in love with your best friend is complicated.


	2. Chapter 2

Your Pov

"You know you never told me what Erwin was talking to you about earlier," Levi said while we were sitting in my room just hanging out. 

"Oh, he just asked me on a date," I answered him reaching for a pizza roll while I was just flipping through my phone.

"Wait, seriously?" Levi asked sounding surprised. "That was ballsy of him," he said now sounding annoyed, but I didn't think anything of it.

"I know right. He's the first guy since Reiner who asked me out back in 10th grade and then stood me up." I told him. Because it was true. Since I've been in high school the only person I have really been interested in has been Levi, but that's complicated, and no one but me knows that. But you'd think I'd get asked on a date more than twice in the last three years and the second one was just today. 

Levi cleared his throat. "Are you going to go out with him? on a date?" 

I shrugged, trying to seem chill about our conversation but on the inside, I was going crazy. I don't like talking to the boy I like about other boys who might like me, it's weird. But it does keep up my cover on not crushing on him "I don't know. I mean Erwin is hot and nice, so it might be fun." 

"You're not for real are you?" Levi sat up and was looking at me now, "Erwin is an ass." 

I rolled my eyes, "Says only you, and you won't say what happened either. The two of you used to be so close right? What happened?" 

Levi looked away, "I just know, and anyway I don't think you should go out with him." 

"Noted," I said dryly, Levi always gets weird when we talk about dating, but I guess in a sense I can understand why. "Um, anyway how did your tryouts go out today?" I asked him trying to change up the conversation also I remember he was trying out for that college play.

"They rescheduled it till Monday," He answered me.

"Oh, so you'll have more time to practice. Do you have a script?" I asked him. Usually, when Levi is getting ready for a bog roll, I'll help him out. And I know he's really excited about this play so I want to do what I can to help. 

"Yeah, but...I was going to practice with Petra tomorrow and the rest of the weekend," he said.

Okay, that's new..."Oh, that's fine. Makes more sense anyway theater kids should help theater kids," I laughed it off, but I think I just died a little.

Levi gave me a little smile, "I don't know why you won't just join us though she'll be over my house, not like I'm telling you can't come over."

"Oh, yeah..But you know I got that thing tomorrow after school," I lied. 

"What thing?" 

"You know...That other thing with Erwin." I lied again. Why am I doing this? I don't have another thing with Erwin I'm just digging a hole for myself. But there is no way in hell I want to be in the same room with Levi and Petra while they practice! Why does he torture me like this?

"I thought you didn't give him an answer?" Levi asked.

"Oh, I didn't it was another thing he was talking to me about." God, this was going to make me looks so dumb if he goes and asks Erwin about this.

"F/n Erwin is a dick, you need to stay clear of him," Levi told me sounding serious.

I'd love to know what the issue with Erwin is. But I shook my head, "Again, noted." I got up taking the plate of pizza rolls that was now empty on my dresser then I plopped down next to Levi on my bed hitting his leg, "Like I said earlier, Erwin is the first guy that's asked me out in like forever. And I wanna date it might be fun." 

"You don't need to date. You should be focused on school and getting into college." 

"Well, the same goes for you." I snapped back.

"Tch, I'm not dating." 

"Tch." I mocked him back, "Then what do you call Petra going over your house?" 

"Practice. Because that's what it is." Levi said.

"Well, consider my date with Erwin practice." 

Levi just looked at me with a blank face, "Fine."

Levi Pov

I could kill Erwin right now.

The one fucking morning I wasn't by F/n and he thinks he has the balls to ask her on a date.

There was a reason no one's asked her to go out on dates since tenth grade. It was me; it was because of a way back when I was still in the tenth grade I gave them all a rule, leave F/n the fuck alone. It wasn't hard. Don't mess with her, Don't ask her out on any dates. To do your homework. If you do, that means you wanted an issue with me. And for the most part, they seemed to get the hint. 

Reiner tried it after then I explained to him how that was a bad idea, then he learned his lesson. 

It was a thing everyone knew and understood.

Everyone expect Erwin. 

The reason why we fell out was because one day I heard him talking about how he was going to nail F/n the first chance he got. And there was no way in hell I was going to let that happened. And he got the nerve to get mad at me about it. The bastard. But Erwin was persistent and always teased and tried to talk to her despite my warnings. 

And now he's actually going to go on a date with her, shit. Why would she say yes when I told her not too? And what thing was talking about she had with him tomorrow? Fuck, I knew I should have said something to him this morning when I saw him talking to her, but I thought to just leave it alone. Shit.

I looked over at F/n who was sitting on her bed on her phone. 

Damn it. 

I don't want to see her get hurt, and I know that's all Erwin is going to do. And now either way it goes it's going to end badly for her, she goes on a date he'll pull some dick move. And when I tell him to leave her along, she'll be sad because she got stood up again. It would be a lot easier if I could tell her the truth, and I wouldn't have to worry about anyone screwing her over because I'd be the one she was with.

Not to mention it would suck ass to see F/n with anyone else and not me.

But seriously how did she think me and Petra were dating? We're just friends, and she's coming over to practice with me. But I won't lie, I could see myself liking her, I mean she is attractive. It's just It's hard to try and like anyone else when it's F/n who I'm always around and thinking about. 

Talking to her about dating is hard. 

She's the one I want, and now she's going on a date with someone else. I should come up with some bullshit reason why I can't practice with Petra tomorrow and just hang out with F/n. That would give her a reason not to see Erwin tomorrow for sure. F/n always drops whatever it is she's doing when I need her. This wouldn't be any different. 

"By the way, I decided I was going to try out for majorettes next mouth," F/n said.

I remember she was talking about that over the summer, but I didn't think she would do it. "Really?" 

"Yeah, it's the beginning of senior year, I need to do something different with my school life." She said sighing.

"I don't know why you won't just be in the drama club, it's not like your not good at theater," I told her. It was true, F/n was a great dancer she had always been, hell I don't think her parents paid all that money for all those years if she wasn't, but F/n, in my opinion, was a much better singer. She had this amazing voice, but she's wasting it because she says she doesn't think it's all that fun.

"Why don't you try out for the choir?" She retorted. 

I rolled my eyes, "You know why, they suck, and I'll be damned if I had to wear one of those damn gowns." 

F/n started laughing, "I bet you'd look cute in a church gown, And I bet your mother would love it too." 

"Tch, no way I have a reputation to keep up." 

F/n snorted, "Yeah, a reputation of frowning and being a jerk." 

"Doesn't stop the girls from wanting me." I joked back.

"Ha, what girls? All the girls think you're too scary, I mean yes I've might have been approached once or twice about you but in the end their all too scared because they think you'll reject them." She told me.

"Not my fault," I told her.

"Not your fault?" F/n sat up with a smile on her face, "It is, don't be so scary." 

"So basically your saying I need to be nice then girls would want to date me?" I was messing with her at this point. The only girl I was interested in dating was her.

"Yeah," She answered shaking her head.

"What about you?" I teased her. I know I shouldn't, but it would be okay if only to get a reaction out of her.

F/n frowned, "Me?...Ugh no?" She said shaking her head, "You're not even my type, you know that I was, Er, I was just saying because of umm...Earlier maybe we should start to date." She paused, "I mean not each other, but you know see what's dating is like before we go off to college and not know what we're doing. I mean that's why I said yes to Erwin to get some experience. Er, my point is maybe you should talk to Petra.." 

F/n was rambling. She does that when she's nervous. Fuck, I shouldn't have said that. She even said it herself I'm just not her type. And... that's fine, but It shouldn't be Erwin. 

I mustered up a smile at her, "Forget I asked." 

"I mean yeah, we had our first kiss together, but that was different right," F/n continued.

"I thought we agreed not to bring that up anymore."

F/n scratched her head, "I know and I'm not bringing it up, I'm just saying we're both about to be 18 this year." F/n stood up, "It's time we got in real relationships." 

What the fuck? "Where is all this coming from?" 

F/n started walking around, "Nowhere really. It was just a passing thought. I mean you and Petra would look nice together, plus she's nice and your well...you." 

"F/n? I told you-" 

"Oh my God, the two of you are annoying to watch." 

F/n and I both looked out her window into my room to see my younger sister leaning in my window watching us. 

"What do you want?" I snapped at her. 

She just rolled her eyes, "Mom wants you over for a minute." 

I sighed, Of course. "I'll be right over," I told her getting up, but I had noticed Mikasa hadn't moved. 

"I said I'd be over there." 

"I know I'm just watching you guys," She said leaning in again.

"Tch, I'll talk to you later F/n," I said. I didn't want to talk to her and Mikasa was right there listening. So I went ahead and claimed to my own room. Leaving F/n in hers without looking back. I didn't know what to say after she just told me we should both start dating. 

I went ahead and started walking downstairs to my mother, and I felt Mikasa behind me. "I don't know why you won't just date F/n If you don't someone else is going to and it will be all over for you." 

"I don't remember asking you for any advice." I snapped at her; I don't know why Mikasa always had something to say about our relationship. "And I've told you a million times I don't like her like that." 

Your Pov

What is wrong with me? 

I know I ask myself that a lot but this a hole I dug myself into and I have no idea how to get out of it. 

Well, I take that back. I have an Idea how to get out of it, but I'm not sure I like it very much. It requires me to look like an idiot to the first guy who's asked me out in 2 years. 

"You sure are weird F/n," Ymir told me as I was walking down the hall to my dreaded destination. I had told her some of my current issue, not the part about me liking Levi, but about the part of me lying and saying I had something to do today after school while he was going to be with Petra. 

Oh, God Petra just the thought of her name put me on edge. I can't fucking believe I encourage him to date her! I was having so much word vomit yesterday. I couldn't even stop it. HIm dating anyone would be terrible for me! Fuck, and now who knows what will happen after school today between them because of my big fat mouth!

"I'm not weird; I'm just stupid." I told Ymir, "Now are we close to his locker or not?" 

"We are, as a matter of fact, he's right there, Good luck." Then Ymir started to walk away.

"Wait!" I called out to her, "I thought you were helping me?" 

"Krista just texted me, I can't," Then she walked away. Shit. Some real friend she is. 

I looked back over and the locker and the boy who was standing next to it. Erwin. I can't believe it's come down to this. 

Taking a deep breath I was about to approach him, but I heard my name called out behind me, I looked over only to see it was Petra. Ew. What does she want?

"Hi, I'm kinda busy," I told her once she was close enough and had stopped.

"Oh, it will only take a second, I just wanted to ask you about Levi." She said smiling.

Oh no, this has happened before, "Um, what about him?" I asked already knowing what she was going to ask me. This wasn't the first time a girl has stopped me and said they wanted to know about Levi. And like I told him it usually goes the same way. She asked if I'm dating him. I say no we're just friends; they say okay later they come back and say they chickened out and they don't know how I can be so cool around him and we either become friends or they get jealous and hate me.

"Well, I was wondering I know you hang out with him a lot, and I've heard some rumors, but I just want to be sure if you're not dating him." She asked.

I don't know why but the thought of her asking me this is putting more of an upsetting feeling in my stomach then when any other girl asked me this. But I shook my head, "No, were not. Me and him are just friends." 

Petra let go of a breath and held her chest, "Oh that god. Because I've been crushing on him hard and later today, I decided I was just going to go for it." 

Oh no, and now of all times for her to do it too? When I just told him he should date her? I can't let this happen!

"But tell me," Petra continued, this time taking my hands and leaning in closer with a smile on her face, "I gotta know your secret, how are you and him so close? Tell me something about him so I'd know how to talk to him about stuff other than theater." 

I needed to say something and quick. I can't have her dating him. It would kill me. I looked away from her, anything to deter her from him..anything at all. Wait! Oh, but he'd be so mad if I made up a rumor of him...But there isn't any way of it getting out, and if he asks about it, I'll tell him it was a joke. Err, hopefully, he'll laugh, I looked back at Petra. 

"He's gay," I lied.

"Huh? Really?" She looked taken back.

I laughed a little, "Ugh, yeah. You can't tell anyone though, but that's why he's never really dated before..,\\.He's just not into us girls like that." 

"Omg, that does make sense. Why else would he sing and be in theater?" Petra said looking like she just got all the pieces of a puzzle together. 

"Well, I don't know about all that. Anyone can do those things...but okay?" I said. This conversation became uncomfortable very fast. 

"Wow, this is just crazy. I don't know why I never figured it out...Does he like anyone?" She asked.

I nodded my head yes, "Yeah...Umm- that one guy...Jean." Shit. Why was I bring other people into this? If Levi ever hears about this he'll kill me! I looked at Petra who looked like she was really thinking about it. "Er, but I have to go..Um..Again, don't tell him I told you but Later." 

Then I went ahead and headed to Erwin's locker. 

I did look back at Petra, who was now walking away. Sighed, I hope that's enough to keep her away from him. I don't know what I'd do it they started dating.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading <3  
> Pretty please leave a kudo and a comment! I wanna know what you think of the new story
> 
> Xoxo


	3. Chapter 3

Levi Pov

"What the fuck do you think you're doing Erwin?" I asked him. I cornered him in the locker room before he went out to the filed for his football practice. I had already decided to confront him, and I finally got the chance to do it. I didn't care that the other guys were watching, they needed to get this in their thick heads too. F/n is off limits.

"I have no idea what you're talking about Levi," Erwin answered folding his arms.

"Don't fuck with me Erwin, why are you talking to F/n?" 

Erwin had the nerve to smile, "I don't get what the issue is Levi, are you dating her?" 

"That's wasn't my question. You know the rule leave her alone." I was glaring at him.

Erwin shrugged, "It's senior year Levi, I got tired of waiting. F/n is cute and funny, And you're not dating her and I want to it's simple. And I don't care if you don't like it, what are you really going to do?" 

"I'll rearrange your face hows that sound?" I told him. But he just laughed again. 

"Yeah, you would gamble your chance for a good scholarship because I'm dating F/n? Sure. And anyway Levi, I may have asked her own a date but she asked me this morning to hang out, so it's something she wants and if you are her friend, why don't you let her be happy?" 

What did he mean she asked him out this morning? She was with me. Well, there was a few minutes before our first class she wasn't, but that didn't mean she had enough time to go and ask him out. And anyway why would she do that? I told her going out with Erwin was a bad idea. Oh, wait- I wonder if this has something to do with what she was rambling about yesterday. That we should start dating. Shit, I didn't think she really meant it. 

"You're overreacting anyway man, it's not like I just want to have sex with her, I want to do other things." He said with a laugh in his voice patting me on the shoulder and leaving.

I could kill him right now.

But I could kill F/n right now too. 

What was going through her head to make this sound like a good idea? I wasn't going to date fucking Petra, and she's not dating this fuckterd either. We're just going to stay the way thing have always been. Why is she trying to change things? She's been so irritating. Lately, She's been like this ever since the senior year started, and I want to know why. I've tried to ignore it, but at this point, it's becoming unbearable. 

"What are you losers looking at?" I snapped at the other guys that I noticed were staring at me still after Erwin had left. They all looked away. Tch, cowards that's why they can't date F/n she needs someone with a backbone.

I went ahead and made my way to find her. We need to talk. I can't let her go through with this Erwin thing. It was a bad idea. I don't know what all Erwin had planned, but I know it doesn't end well. I'm sure he plans on having sex with her, and that there is enough for me to put a stop to his plans. F/n is a virgin, and there is no way in hell I'd let the first guys she's with screw her over and make her feel like shit.

"F/n," I called out to her when I found her standing in the hall talking to Ymir and Krista. 

"We need to talk real quick," I said once I was close enough to her.

F/n frowned, "About that?" 

"I'd rather talk to you without the audience," I said looking at her to Ymir and Krista.

Ymir chucked, "Laters you two." Then she and her girlfriend walked off leaving the two of us.

"Look, Levi, before you get mad at me I just want to say sorry," F/n started.

"Sorry about what?" I asked her, I know I wanted to talk about Erwin but she has no reason to be sorry about it.

"Er, what were you about to talk to me about?" 

"What are you talking about?" 

F/n looked guilty, "Nothing." 

Lier, "F/n you can't go out with Erwin." I told her ignoring whatever she was lying about.

An expression crossed her face for just a moment, but I couldn't put a name to it. "Why?" 

"Because he only wants to have sex with you," I told her.

Her eyes went wide and she pulled me closer, "Seriously? How do you know?" 

"Because I just know, so you can't go out with him." This was the only way to stop them because Erwin isn't going to listen to me, but if I can make F/n decide not to go out with him that would be even better.

But her expression was one I wasn't expecting, "Well, I can't help but say I'm a bit flattered."

"It's not fucking funny. You need to tell him you can't hang out with him." I told her.

F/n nodded, "Your right. I'll end it with him," F/n started laughing, "But seriously? I always pictured Erwin being this nice guy it doesn't sound like him." 

"Don't read into it too much, I was just trying to look out for you ya know," I told her leaning on the wall.

"My knight in shining armor." She joked. "I need to get to my last class for the day, you got any plans for after school?" 

"Just my practice with Petra, but she won't be over until later."

F/n smiled went away, "Oh, Um okay, I'll just pop in your room later.Just tell me when you are done. " started to walk away, "I got some math homework that looks like it's going to be a beast so I'll need your help." 

I rolled my eyes at her. "See you later." I had a free period and to be honest; I didn't have anything to do for the rest of the day. But I stay here mostly because of F/n. But today I think I might go home for a bit and come back to just pick her up, Erwin did just piss me off enough that I was over today. 

"Dude, what the hell?" I looked down the hallway to see Furlan walked closer to looking confused.

"What's up?" 

"Have you heard the rumors? If you did you're taking it pretty well." He said. 

"What are you talking about." 

"Hey Levi," I looked over to see that two-toned hair guy named Jean, I think I might have a class with him. "Yeah, I'm flattered and all but I don't think it would work out, not between us, Marco is the only one for me." 

"What the fuck are you talking about?" I asked him.

"Well, you know. I just had to tell you the truth I didn't want to lead you on." He said looking nervous. 

"Seriously I don't know what you're getting at over here." 

"Dude he thinks you like him," Furlan said with a smirk on his face.

I frowned, "Sorry, but no I don't thank for telling me how you feel." I told him. Jean looked like he was okay with that answer, and started to walk away. I turned to Furlan. "What was that all about?" 

Furlan shrugged, "The rumor that's going around is your gay, and you liked Jean." 

I chuckled, "Are you for real?

"Yeah, Everyone has been talking about it," Furlan said.

I shrugged, I didn't think too much of it. It's not like it was true, a little annoying because that means everyone was just talking about me but who really cares? F/n knows I'm not that all that really matters.

But, I wonder who started it. 

Your Pov

My classes went pretty good. After I talked to Levi before math, he gave me a good reason to not to go through that whole thing with Erwin. Now that the day is over I just need to tell him I can't go out. Although I have to say, it's strange that Erwin is just after sex. He always seems so nice, but I guess you can't judge a book by its cover. But it is reasons like this that make me fall in love with Levi even more. I know he does it just because we're friends but having a guy look out for you and you know will tell you the truth about everything is a nice feeling.

"Hey, F/n!" Ymir called out to me as I was walking to the football field that's the only place I knew I could find him after school. We had actually agreed that I would just watch him practice and he'd just given me a ride home once he was done for today. 

"F/n hurry up and get over here?" Ymir yelled again.

I caught up with her as she started walking to the field, "What is it?" I snapped at her. She can be so demanding sometimes.

"What did you and shorty talk about?" 

"Seriously? That's what you made me run over here for?" I asked her. Ymir was a close friend of mine, not as much as Levi was, but she was someone I've known since tenth grade and we've had a few classes together and I thought her realness was funny.

"Yeah," She just smiled, "Did he confess to you?" 

I looked away from her, "I don't know what you're talking about." I lied. She was smart too, to be honest, she was sorta girl version of Levi...Sorta- they had a lot of differences but for the most part, they remind me of each other. 

"I guess not." Ymir shook her head. "And I don't know why you try to deny it. Everyone knows you two are in love with each other." 

I snorted, "As if. Levi and I are just friends always have been always will be." I lied again. It was just I couldn't tell anyone what I was really feeling. Because I just know It would get back to him, and I would want to just die. 

"So complicated, What are you doing now? The tryout isn't until a while you know right?" She told me. Ymir was a majorette, and she knew I wanted to try out this year so she's had been giving me a few pointers and had been encouraging me to try out.

"Oh no, this is about Erwin. I have to cancel on him." 

"But you just asked him this morning?" 

I nodded, "Yeah, but I found out he's only after my cookies and my mom says don't hand them out." 

Ymir laughed, "How old are you?"

"17," I said rolling my eyes, I know what she was getting at. But you know I didn't mind so much being a virgin still. It wasn't a bad thing. It was simply I haven't been out with anyone I want to have sex with. Well, other then Levi, but I know that won't ever happen.

"So cute, F/n is 17 and still a virgin." Ymir teased me.

I rolled my eyes again, "Leave me alone, I just haven't found the right person." 

"You mean you haven't told Levi how much you want to do him yet." 

"Oh, my gosh it's not even like that," I told her groaning that time. 

"Sure, sure, Anyway I gotta go to the locker room see you later," Yimr told me then walking away.

I sighed, she is a handful. Shaking my head, I looked out for Erwin. I wanted to be quick about this I know Levi should already should be back to pick me up from school. He told me he went home for the last to periods.

"Looking for someone?" I heard someone say behind me starting me. I turned to see it was Erwin.

"Goddamnit," I said playfully hitting him. "You could have killed me." 

"Ha," Erwin laughed, "Well I can't be doing that, not after I finally got the chance o go out with you." 

Oh, this was going to be awkward. "About that-" I started to tell him, and Erwin's smile went away, "It's just something came up, and I don't think I can go out with you..." Aw, I felt bad for lying to him like this. But there is no way I'm going to put myself in a situation where I'm going to have sex with him.

'What happened?" He asked me.

Ugh, why did he have to ask that? "It's family stuff," I lied. You know I've lied a lot today.

"Is this about Levi?" He asked me.

"What? No." Wait, he didn't think I liked Levi too did her? Cause if he did omg, how is it everyone knows how I feel about him except him? I mean I'm glad he doesn't know because that would ruin our friendship, but I can't help but sort hope that if he did know then he'd realize how much he feels the same way. I know it's unlikely but I like to dream

F/n are you sure? Because Levi came and talked to me this morning too, and now your saying this. I can't help but wonder he put you up to this." Erwin told me putting his hands on his hips.

"He didn't It's just stuff has been going on and I just can't right now," I told him. 

"Well I've waited this long I guess I can wait a little longer for you." He smiled.

I tilted my head, "So you've had a crush on me for a while and finally have to courage to ask me out?" I teased him.

He just shrugged, "I guess so." 

I laughed, "What were you scared of? It's not like I'd bite your head off. And anyway I was kinda happy you asked me out. I mean no boy has asked me out in high school expcet Reiner who stood me up. So going on a date with you sounded excited." 

"Well, It wasn't you I was scared of, It was more Levi," He asnswered scratching his head. 

I couldn't help but laugh some more, "Levi isn't that bad." Wait, this was a good chance I could as him. "What happened with you and Levi by the way?" 

He frowend, "You don't know?" 

I shook my head.

"It was because of you," He answered me.

"Me?" 

"Yeah, it was a long time ago but I was talking about how I wanted to ask you on a date and he told me I couldn't." 

I had stopped laughing by now, "What do you mean you couldn't?' 

"Don't you know? That's the rule leave you alone." Erwin said.

I chucked, but I wasn't really finding this sunny, "What do you mean leave me alone?" 

"F/n, Levi's told all the guys here no one was allowed to ask you out or anything." He informed me.

I couldn't believe what I was hearing, "Why?" 

"How should I know? But I'm sure it's because he likes you or something." 

"He likes me?" 

"Ugh, F/n I'd love to get into this more, but I have to go practice." He said patting me on the shoulder and heading down to the field.

I was stun. He couldn't be telling the truth. Levi liked me? And had been telling all the boys don't to ask me out. That's why I hadn't been getting asked out. That was just a lot to take in. It couldn't be true.

My phone buzzed. I pulled it out only to see Levi texted me: 

-Can you get a ride home with Furlan? I got busy.

I put my phone back up. Scratching my head. 

Levi Liked me?

Levi Pov

"You're earlier," I told Petra who was in my house now. 

"Yeah, I don't have a class at the end of the day so I figured we could just get this over with." She answered.

I nodded sipping some of the ice tea she brought me. Petra was nice, she had picked one up for the both of us before she got here.

"You wanna just get this started?" She asked.

"Yeah why not, follow me to my room," I told her leading to my room. It was easier to practice in here, plus when F/n gets here, she can just pop in and help us out. I've been thinking about it, but I'm going to get her to try out for this play I know she'd like it. Even if she's just the background. 

"Oh wow, your room is so clean," Petra said when she got to my room. 

"Yeah, that's how I keep it. You got your script?" 

Petra nodded, "Yes, ugh let's get started." He little blush didn't go past me. I guess she's one of those other girls who liked me. But was scared to say something. surprisingly, cute.

~Later~

It has been a while that Petra and I had been going over some of the lines. I really wanted this roll. Yeah, I know the chances of me getting the part in a college play was slim to none, but I want to still try my best. And Petra seemed like she really wanted this part too, we both even tried out the duet for a bit, and while she's no F/n she did have an okay set of pipes. So maybe she has a chance.

"I'm sorry but I have to ask something and I know it's a bit rude but I need to know," Petra said all of a sudden after we finished the song for like the fifth time.

"Shoot." 

"Um, so are you gay gay or are you bi? like do you sometimes date girls or is it only guys?" she said in a hurry.

"Tch, I don't know where that rumor can from, but I'm not gay," I told her. Seriously who made that up? I bet it was Erwin being a dick. Him or Mikasa's friend Eren. It sounds like something he would to calling himself funny.

"Wait for your not?" Petra said looked completely confused. 

"No, I'm not." 

"But-but F/n said you were and the two of you are like best friends right?" She said. 

The fuck? F/n?

"When did she say that?" 

"Well, I asked her about you this morning and she told me you're gay." 

What the fuck F/n, you started that rumor? Why?" I shook my head, "Nah, I think she was just joking with you." 

"Are you sure you're not just saying that to save face? F/n doesn't seem like the type to lie." Petra said. Well, she doesn't know F/n.

"I'm telling you the truth." 

"Prove it." She said with a smile on her face.

I frowned, "Prove it?" 

Petra walked closer to me, "Yeah, prove it." 

"I don't think I get what you mean," I said playing dumb, but I knew she wanted to kiss me or something. She was biting her lip and me and I'm not going to lie her shirt had started to unbutton and I was now trying not to stare at her. 

"I think you do." Hmm, she smelled good too.

I shook my head, Nah. I didn't want to do this. I should focus on what she came here for. So pushed passed her, "We should focus on practicing." 

I heard her chuckled, "I See you are, it's okay really I was just wondering, It's just I like you a lot and was kinda hoping I had a chance with you." 

"Tch, I told you I'm not. I just don't want to be with you." 

"Oh," Petra said sounding a little sad. 

Damn, that was harsh. This isn't F/n I'm talking too, she probably doesn't get how I joke.

"That's not what I meant, it's just," 

"You like F/n?" Petra asked me out of nowhere.

"No." 

She raised an eyebrow.

"I don't she's just my friend. I just don't particularly like dating. it's not my thing. You're cute and all but I just rather not." I told her honestly.

She moved to sit beside me on my bed, "Oh," 

I nodded my head, "Yeah, sorry." 

"Well, that sorta sucks you're a really cool guy." 

"Thanks," I told her.

She laughed again, "But I still think your lying." 

"Seriously?" 

"You gotta prove it." She said smiling. 

Her smile was a little contagious, I rolled my eyes, "Fine." Then I reached over to give her a light kiss. 

Petra smiled back once I moved back, "I'm not sure if that was very convincing." 

I rolled my eyes, "How about this?" 

Your Pov

Levi likes me?

I've been thinking about that since Erwin told me.

What if he does? 

OMG, What if he does? 

No, no I can't say anything. I shook my head; I can't get my hopes like that. If he really did Levi is the type of person who tells you how he feels about everything. He would have confessed. But what other reason would there be for him to tell all the guys to not ask me out? Unless that was him being a protective friend?

Ugh, this was frustrating. 

I went ahead and walked home, I had a lot to think about and I didn't want Furlan to distract me by talking. I do love him and Bella, but I know they'll just want to talk and talk. And this is some heavy shit I got on my mind right now, I have to figure out what I should do now.

I mean, I should tell him I know what he's been telling all the guys now, and I should ask him. Hmm, maybe if I do that it will give him the chance to tell me how he feels. Oh God, Maybe that would work.

What if Levi loved me back? The way I love him? My world would be perfect. To date Levi is all I want in life right now, he's my best friend. And wouldn't it be amazing to be with your best friend in a relationship?

I got to my room, Before I go talk to him, I should take a shower, he gets mad at me sometimes and says I stink after a long day at school.

I was going to my bathroom when my mom yelled at me from downstairs, "Hey love, do you know if Levi is coming over tonight?" 

"Ugh, I doubt it. I was going to go over his house." I answered her. 

"Ask him if he wants too, I'm making his favorite, oh and ask Mikasa too. I just need to know so I can get enough before I go to the store!" She yelled at me. 

"Sure thing hold on," I called out to her. 

it was a usual thing on the weekend that our moms would take turns cooking dinner and we would just eat at whoever's house made the best food. Our moms didn't seem to mind that much about it. Most likely now Levi will come over now since my mom said she's making his favorite. He's such a mooch, ha, but I guess I am too, I do this to his mom too.

I went back to my room to my window to call over to him, he should be home practicing now or he should be doing homework now, hopefully, the latter. But when I opened my window his was closed. God, I hate it when he does this. He's lucky it's easy to open it from the outside. 

I started to climb over this his window and open it up but looking inside, I saw the last thing I ever thought I'd see.

It was Levi, but he was with Petra...on his bed...with her 

Naked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> it's getting juicy! Who knows what will happen next??
> 
> Lol, I hope you guy enjoys this story I'd love to know what you think of it so please leave a comment and a kudo 
> 
> xoxo


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whoop whoop new chapter!

Your Pov

I couldn't breathe. 

I almost fell off his roof trying to hurry and getting back into my room, but luckily I caught myself... Ha, Lucky. I was far from that right now. 

I just saw Levi having sex with someone...and I'm sure that someone was Petra. Who else could it be? She was supposed to be over there practicing with him, some practice that is!

I shook my head, God, why? Why did I have to see that? Why was she over there? What happened? I told her he was gay; I thought she would leave him alone after that! And Levi...He was with someone else. I- I just never thought that would happen. Levi was a virgin, well from as far as I knew. And if he had just lost his V-card, he lost it to Petra? I never even knew he liked her that much, he would have told me. He should have told me!...but what if he didn't...What if he only did this because of what I said yesterday? Oh, God, this was all my fault. I was the reason that this happened.

I was the reason he was with her now. All because of my stupid mouth. God, I hate myself. I'm so stupid! Why did I have to tell him to go out with her? Why did he have to listen? Why couldn't he see that he and I are right for each other and he shouldn't be with anyone else but me? Why did he have to be such an important person in my life? Why was he so lucky to find someone who he could love and leave me all alone? Why did my life suck so bad? Why couldn't anyone like me? That way I wouldn't be so concerned with Levi.

God, I wanted to cry. Levi was with someone else...he was in love with someone else. It was just dawning on me. Why did I think it would just be Levi and me forever, even if we were just friends. This whole thing is just- it just feels so heavy how come I never thought of the real possibility of him with someone else? Was I that so naive? How was he able to find someone and I wasn't? Why was he so lucky?

Wait? I know why! Erwin told me today; it's all Levi's fault! I would have probably already been in a relationship with someone, but apparently, Levi's been going around and scaring all the guys away! And for what? Because he likes me? Or so Erwin thinks. But if he liked me, he wouldn't be in his room having the time of his life with Petra! Levi has been ruining my life! And all for what? I know because he's a dick. What does he think he's my older brother? He's so selfish! And now here I am sad and alone while he's happy and fucking another girl. 

My tears started to run hot. I can't believe him! All this time I could have moved on from this little crush with someone else, but instead no because he's been making me seem like the black plague! Jesus, I am so mad!

You know what I'll show him. I don't need him. God, I don't think I could stand to even look at his face right now. That prick! If he thinks he can get away with what he's done, then he has another thing coming!

I stood up wiping my face and went to get my phone. I don't need him, And I don't care if he's with someone else. I kept telling myself in my head. Levi can have Petra it's fine. They're probably right for each other since they're both in theater. It's the beginning of the senior year, so things are bound to change like they do every year. And one of those changes this time is Levi and me. He's apparently living his life to the fullest, so I should do that same.

Lucky, I had Erwin's number in my phone. I mean Erwin isn't bad. He's good looking and nice, and he likes me, what more can I ask for? And now that I think about it, I have reason to believe Levi was lying earlier about him. 

Erwin answered his phone, "Wow, and what did I do to get someone as great as you to call me?" 

See he's even sweet.

I just laughed, "I was just thinking, I ended up being free after I told you I wasn't and was seeing if you still might wanna hang out?" 

"Wow, I feel so lucky," He said, "I did just get done with practice, um..if you give me like an hour in half and I could come pick you up?" 

<"That sounds perfect! I'll see you then?" I told him hanging up. Honestly, I didn't care; I just wanted to do something. Because anything would be better than being here when Levi's done and tries to act like nothing happened and comes over here. I just don't want to see him. I don't need him.

I'm going to go out with Erwin and have fun.

Levi Pov

I sat on my bed scratching my head while I watched Petra put her clothes back on. 

I don't know what I was just thinking. I was caught in the moment. I don't regret it though, I mean it was just a moment of passion right? I just hope she doesn't get the wrong idea about it and think I want to be with her in a serious relationship. 

I should say something like I don't want a relationship or anything, but I don't want to be rude either. I should only say something if she says something. But then again she hasn't said anything yet. After we were done, we both laid there for a minute, and neither one of us said anything it was a little weird.

Shit, neither one of us still hasn't said anything, and she's getting dressed. 

Ugh, I wish it wasn't this awkward.

"That was-" I started but didn't know how to finish it. I mean I know she came, so she felt good. Not to toot my own horn, but I know what I'm doing. Petra wasn't my first, and she wasn't my second either. 

"It's was great," She said finishing my sentence smiling, but not making eye contact with me. 

I nodded my head at her, "Yeah, it was." She was alright, to be honest. I noticed she still hadn't really looked back at me; I guess she was still feeling shy.

"Um, are your parents home? I'd hate to see them as I'm walking out," She asked while trying to fix her hair in my mirror. 

"My mom isn't home at she doesn't get here until later tonight, and Mikasa is at her friends I think." 

"Great," She said picking up her bag, "Um...We should practice some more, but I'll see you later." Then she walked out of my room. I went ahead and followed her downstairs and watched her leave out to her car in. Guess that's over now. I clicked my tongue in annoyance I don't know why but I can't shake this bad feeling now. 

I wonder what's F/n up too now? I'm sure she's home.

She must have gone to the shower or eating or something. I should just be thankful she didn't come over. That would've been a mess, knowing her she would be so clueless she would walk in not noticing what was going on. Also I part of me doesn't want her to see me with anyone else. I know she was saying nonsense about us dating, but I wasn't about too. Like I said it was just a fling I had with Petra just now, nothing I want to keep going.

What I need to do is tell F/n the truth, it will just take a while. I mean the chances of her feeling the same way are slim to none, but something tells me guys like Erwin are going to keep going after her, and I don't think I can handle that. Especially since she's saying, she wants to date now. I should just end it all by asking her out...I just don't know how she would react. It's risky, but it's like the last year we'll live here next to each other. I shouldn't just let it slip. And if she says no the worst thing is that it would be awkward for a bit, but nothing we couldn't get over. We've had our share of awkward moments.

Like our first kiss. It was so stupid, she was the first girl I ever kissed, and I was the first guy she ever kissed. We were like ten or eleven we were at some birthday party, and we were all playing spend the bottle. The bottle never ended up landing on either of us, and I think she was bummed out about it. So later that night when we were home, I said it would be easier to get our first kiss over with each other that way when we were older we'd know what we were doing with someone else. And she went with it. And it was weird, and we both agreed we wouldn't talk about it. 

After that, she was a bit distant for a while, but we were able to recover from it. So it shouldn't be so bad if I tell her how I feel now. And it worst comes to worst I can just tell her I was joking.

But again I don't know how or when, but I know I should tell her. 

I went ahead and took a shower and got out. I'm surprised she hasn't popped in here already. I looked over at her window once I was back in my room only to see her curtains closed. Weird. I mean she does that when she's getting dressed, but it's rare, most of the time I think she just gets dressed in her bathroom. And it's not like she's never gotten dressed in fount of me before. I usually don't look, but she acts like she doesn't care, saying things like a bra and underwear is the same thing as a bikini. I don't trust myself looking at her in either. She doesn't realize it, but she is hot.

I went and picked up my phone to call her to see what was up, but she didn't answer. What is she doing?

Tch, she's so annoying. I went ahead and started to claim to her window, but when I tried to open it, it was locked. What is she doing? I knocked on it. No answer. I knocked again.

"Who is it?" She asked her.

"Santa Claus who the fuck do you think," I snapped at her. 

She opened her window, "What do you want?" 

F/n had makeup on and was wearing a crop top and shorts. And her hair was up. She was planning on going somewhere. "Where are you going?" I asked her.

She rolled her eyes. "To see a man about a dog." 

"Okay, Are going out with your mom going tonight?" I asked her trying to move into her room, but she put her arm out stopping me.

"Now isn't a good time." 

"Why not? Even if you're going out with your mom you know she wouldn't want you dressed like that," I told her. If her dad saw her like this he'd have a heart attack, shit I was having a heart attack.

F/n rolled her eyes again huffing out, "I don't care what you think. I'm going out and I'm trying to get dressed will you please go home." 

"What is your issue?" I asked her clearly something was up, she's all snappy with me. And Yet I've done nothing. 

"I don't have one." F/n said looking into my eyes now, "Now, would you leave?" 

"Fine," I said moving away from her window going back to mine, "You could at least-" But before I could finish talking to her she slammed her window closing the curtains again.

What the fuck?

F/n was upset again, but about what now? We were cool this morning. What the fuck happened between then and now. I know Furlan gave her a ride home. What happened? I picked up my phone to call him, maybe he knew, but he didn't answer his phone. Did no one answer their phone anymore? 

I looked over at F/n window again, only to see her open it back up like on cue. "I'm going out on a date Levi. That's why I'm dressed up and going out." 

I frowned, now who asked her out? "With who?"

She just shrugged smiling, "With Erwin." 

"What?" 

"I said, Erwin." 

"I heard who you said, I thought I told you he's no good, He only wants to have sex with you, you can't let him." I told her, what the hell was she thinking?

"So, I mean there are worst things. Anyway, he's nice." 

"F/n you sound like an idiot, it's a bad idea." I have no idea what's going on in her head right now.

"I hear your opinion, but I don't agree. I'm going out to have fun" She told me. "Besides it might be fun to have sex I wouldn't know I've never done it before." F/n has completely lost her mind. I was about to say something else, but then we both heard a car horn go off making us both look out to the street. 

"Oh, great he's here."

"Wait, you're letting him drive you?" I asked her. This was all happening too fast.

"See, you don't wait up." She said, before running out.

Why? What was she-what the fuck! 

Your Pov

Okay, I hope that worked.

I was still angry with Levi, and I want him to be angry too so I figured it would piss him off if he knew that I was going out with Erwin since it's apparently Levi's life's mission to make sure I never go out with anyone. And since He and Erwin are not on good terms, it just makes the whole thing better if you ask me. Levi seemed confused, so I guess that was good enough. For now. Still, I'm mad at him.

The thing now is actually being on a date...I rushed into this whole thing so fast I didn't stop to think that this is actually my first date. I would have had one back in sophomore year, but Reiner was a no-show after he asked me...Wait, come to think about it, was that because of Levi? I bet it was! What the actual fuck? I could just punch him right now! How dare he!

"You alright there F/n?" Erwin spoke up after a moment. 

I was sitting in his car, and I had no idea where we were going. Maybe somewhere to eat? Like I said I didn't think this whole thing through. "Um I'm fine," I told him in a small voice in actuality I don't think I was fine. I was far from it. This was my first date! Sure I had gone out with Levi and hung out places before, but that was different. This was real. I was going out with a guy who might actually like me.

"You know I can't but help be a little surprised you said yes to going out with me," Erwin said.

"Huh? why is that?" 

Erwin shrugged, "Oh, you know cause of Levi." 

I frowned, "I don't know if I get you." 

"I had just kinda figured that you two were going out. You're always with each other, you've always been since we were in middle school. And since Levi always told all of us to leave you alone, I figured it was because he was in or wanted to be in a relationship with you. And I figured you must have liked him back or something." 

"Ha," I laughed a little if he only knew, "I still think you're wrong about Levi liking me. We've only ever been friends. He'd never see me as anything more." 

"What about you though?" He asked glancing at me.

I shrugged, "Well if I did I wouldn't be going out with you right now would I?" I wish he'd talk about something else now, the point of his date is to stop thinking about Levi.

"Fair point." He said smiling. "Well, if this is our first date, one of many I hope, then I need to bring my game." 

"Well, I hope you do this is my first date after all." I told him.

Erwin glanced at me, "Really? Then I really need to bring it. Don't worry F/n I'll make this a night you won't ever forget." 

~~Later~~

Okay, so I actually had fun.

Like a lot of fun.

Erwin took us to some random arcade, and we just played games and at snacks. Erwin is surprisingly funny. And is honestly such a nice guy. He didn't even try anything the whole time we were out. I didn't even think about Levi the entire time we were out. 

Well, that was before he brought me back home. 

"I hope you had fun," Erwin said taking me out of my thoughts as he walked me back to my door.

I smiled at him, "Yeah, I did." 

Next thing I knew Erwin took my hand surprising me. Shit. What am I supposed to do? I just kept smiling. Uggggh I have no idea what about to happen, why did he take my hand now? This is the worst. Is he going to try and kiss me? Should I kiss him back? I don't know! Where is Levi to tell me what to do when I need him? Wait! I don't need him! I shook my head I need to focus on what's happening.

Erwin and I had both stopped in front of my door. And now we were just looking at each other. I'm pretty sure I should say something...But what? Oh, fuck it. "I am I supposed to kiss you now?" I bluntly asked him.

Erwin's face went red, and his other bed went to scratch the back of his neck. Oh, God, I made it weird. Jeusu F/n what is wrong with you? Erwin cleared his throat. 

"I'm sorry," I started before he could say anything, "I'm new to this I don't know how this is supposed to go." 

Erwin gave me a little smile, "It's fine." 

"Is it?" 

Erwin let out a breath, "It is. Really. But to answer your question. No, it not. I mean I don't want you to think you have to. I'm happy with ending the night like this. I had fun with you and hope we can do it again." 

I let go of the breath I didn't know I was holding. "Oh, great." Then I realized what I had just said, "I mean not great that I don't have to kiss you. Great that you didn't say no you're weird and ran away." 

Erwin laughed, "After all the time I've waited to go out with you? Unlikely that I would run away." 

"Well, you make a good point," I said leaning on my door.

Erwin let go of my hand, "Well, it's been fun F/n I'll see you Monday?" 

I nodded. "Yup...Unless you wanna go out tomorrow and hang out or join me on my morning weekend run or something." 

"Are you asking me on another date?" 

I shrugged, "Could be I'm not sure." 

Erwin smiled, "Sure, just text me when to meet you in the morning." 

"Sure thing," I told him then I started to head inside my house. 

"F/n," I looked back at Erwin who called me again before I closed the door.

"Hmm?" 

"I'm just letting out hot air here," He started to say not looking at me, "But if you wanted to kiss me, I wouldn't be so objected to it." 

I smiled at him; he was kinda adorable. How was it I hadn't ever really noticed Erwin before? I walked closer to him. I'm not sure how to kiss really considering the only person I've ever kissed was Levi, and it was when we were like eight or nine. So years ago. 

I was close enough to Erwin again to make this simple it doesn't have to be anything grand just a quick peck. Erwin was looking at me sorta intently though so that might be a little nerve working but I can get through this. But before I knew it, Erwin moved his hand under my chin and proceeded to kiss me. Once we were done he looked back and smiled, "I'll see you in the morning." 

And just like that, he left to his car, and I went inside my house closing the door.

Wow.

I don't know what Levi did when we were nine, but it wasn't that. 

The kiss was nice. It wasn't simple, but there wasn't any tongue thankfully I wouldn't know what to do with that. I put my hand on my chest. Omg, I think he just took my breath away. Damn, I was not ready for that! Was that my sexual awakening? Because ya girl wants more! I shook my head laughing to myself; I have to tell Levi-

Oh, that's right. I'm not talking to him. How is it I keep forgetting that?

I wonder what he's doing now? I sighed, say that, but I shouldn't care. I'll still be nice to him, but just to make him angry. I can't believe he's been going around ruining my life and living his happily the jerk. 

But for now, I don't want to see him. I should just ignore him and make him wonder what happened. I bet that would make him angry.

Levi Pov

It was Monday, and somehow F/n avoided me a whole weekend. She said she was busy, but twice I saw her leaving out with Erwin. I figured she was just going through something, so I give her some space, but this is getting ridiculous now. She told me not to wait for her going to school because Erwin was giving her a ride. When the hell did they become so close? 

F/n usually listens to me when I tell her things, and I told her Erwin was no good. Yet, she went out with him more than once. And is now getting rides with him to go to school. And even if she was doing this just do so something different she would have told me. She tells me everything. Naturally, I figured she would come home and tell me about it, but she didn't. I don't know what is up with her it like she's lost her damn mind.

"Wassup Levi," I looked over and saw Furlan walking up to me. 

"Did you just get here?" I asked him.

"Yeah, why?" He asked.

I shook my head, "I was just wondering if you saw F/n." 

"Why is she missing or something?" 

"No, but she came to school with Erwin," I told him.

"Oh, really?"He said sounding interested. 

"Yeah, she's been acting weird since last Friday," I started to tell him, "She actually went out with him. On a date." 

"Yeah, so?" He said as we went to our lockers, "About time she went on a date if you asked me." 

I slammed my locker closed making him jump, "She could at least tell me how it went." 

Furlan smiled, "What did you finally decided to tell her you like her?" 

"Shut up." 

Furlan figured how I felt about F/n long before me it seems; he likes to say it's the only natural since we've been so close and she has to want me to, but I know that most likely far from the truth. 

I heard Furlan laugh, "I take that as I yes?" 

"So you wanna tell me what's up with F/n Levi?" I looked over to see Bella walking up to Furlan and me.

"Tch, how should I know?" I asked her. Now, what was she up too? 

"Well, you know cause the two of you are joined at the hip. Anyway I just saw her and Erwin walking down the hall, and they were holding hands like some type of couple," She told me.

What the fuck? But I shook my head; I can't make a scene. "So? F/n is her own person I can't keep up with her," 

"Oh, wow Bella was serious," Furlan said nodding his head down the hall. 

And there they were F/n and that asshole Erwin walking together holding hands. What we they a couple? He's only playing her, And she's letting him! I won't stand for this shit. I moved towards them. "F/n can we talk a sec," I asked her stopping in fount of them. This has gone on long enough. 

F/n acted like she was surprised to see me. "Um, can you wait until class?" 

"No, I need to talk to you know," I told her.

"Well, whatever you have to say to my girlfriend you can say in fount of me too," Erwin spoke up, but all I heard was white noise. 

"F/n, I just need a se- wait." My brain just registered what he just said. "Did you just say, girlfriend?" 

"Yeah, Erwin and I are-" But I didn't care about anything else she was about to say I grabbed her arms and walked off with her. She needed to explain this shit and now.

F/n had apparently just lost her mind, and I need to help her find it. I dragged her into an empty classroom closing the door. "Explain yourself. Now." 

F/n crossed her arms, "You are not my dad." 

"F/n what the hell are you doing? I told you, Erwin, doesn't care about you; he only wants to get into your pants!" I snapped at her.

"How would you know? You don't even talk to him," She snapped back.

I pinched the bridge of my nose. "F/n I'm a guy I know." 

"That doesn't mean anything." 

"Why won't you just let me protect you?" 

"From what?" She yelled waving her hands in the air. "The only person I should be protected from is you!" 

"What the hell is that supposed to mean," I asked her. She's always saying something stupid.

"Don't play stupid Levi, I know the truth now," She snapped pointing her finger at me. The truth about what? "I know You've been telling all the guys at school not to talk to me. But I just don't get why? Why can't I be happy in a relationship with someone? When you can?" 

Shit. Okay, I get why she could get mad about that. I never wanted her to know I was doing that I was sure she'd be pissed, but what's this about me being in a relationship? "I'm not in a relationship." 

"Why are you lying Levi? I know you like Petra, and I know you slept with her. I saw you I just want to know why is it okay for you to be with someone else and not me," She said sounding like she was about to cry.

Shit. She saw us? "F/n I don't know what you think you saw but-"

"Think? I saw you fucking her with my own two eyes Levi!" She yelled.

"Can you keep it down?" I told her, "You know there all out there listening to us already." I said. No doubt there was a group outside the door listening to us argue the teenagers here are noisy as shit.

"As If I cared Levi." F/n snapped walking to the door opening it only to see a group of people standing at the door including Furlan, Bella, Erwin and even Mikasa. "I don't care if they know." She looked at all of them, "Levi is a hypocrite, and I'm not friends with him anymore." Then she strutted out the door.

I sighed. 

That just went all types of wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading!
> 
> Things are getting messy between reader and Levi, how will Levi ever make it up to you? Who knows. 
> 
> Again thank you so much for reading please Leave a kudo and/or comment it you liked it or have something you want to say good or bad I don't mind. 
> 
> And It really encourages me to write more when I see you all leave a comment, it tells me where I need to go with the story, or just simply know I'm putting a smile on someone's face and that just makes my day! You all are amazing and I can never say thank you enough for enjoying these little stories I write in my head all day then decided not to be lazy for an hour or four and write, you guys make it worth it!
> 
> Your all the real MVPS <3 
> 
> A million thanks 
> 
> xoxo


	5. Chapter 5

Levi Pov

It's been three days, and F/n still won't talk to me. 

She won't answer my calls. She's been keeping her window locked. She ignores me in class, and in the hall. She even told her mom to tell me she wasn't feeling well yesterday just so I couldn't come over. F/n won't see me at all. I could tell her mom the truth; that's she's just mad at me, but that would just make her even angrier. Because I know her mom will just tell mine, and they both would make us talk to each other, that would only piss off F/n, and I've already done that enough. 

It's just so frustrating F/n won't listen to reason at all. I just don't get why she's so mad. I mean yeah, I understand that she'd get pissed that I was telling the guys to stay away from her, but it wasn't a big deal. I was only doing that to protect her. It's something we should be able to talk about. And she won't even listen to me when I tell her I am not dating Petra.it's doesn't make sense, why would be so angry about that either. It was just a mess. F/n was so pissed, and worst she won't even let me fix it.

And since she's been ignoring me, it's been hell. She's all I can think about. My best friend won't even talk to me. What am I supposed to do? I got the lead male part in that college play, and she was the first person I wanted to tell, but she won't even look at me. And I know Erwin is loving this. I hate seeing his smug face when they're together. This is what he wanted; he wanted F/n not to talk to me. I know he's planning on something I just know it. He has to be the one who told her I had told the guys not to date her. I swear If I knew I wouldn't get in so much trouble for knocking him out I would have been done it. I just still can't believe she actually decided to date him. I should be mad at her about that. Oh, and the fact for the last two days I keep hearing everyone talk behind my back about me being gay; which is her fault too. I wasn't upset about that as much as the Erwin thing, but it was still annoying.

Ugh, it was just irratating. 

But I think what was more annoying was Petra. 

Well, I won't call her completely annoying. She was there at the audition and was really encouraging, and it helps that she's been acting really cool since we had sex. She hasn't been clingy or anything, and I appreciate that. I seriously didn't need that right now especially with all this going on with F/n; I know it might not be smart to hang out with Petra since F/n already thinks I'm dating her, but what can I do when Petra is being more of a friend then she is. And I'm not going to lie I've been hanging out with Petra more now because she sorta the only one keeping my mind off of F/n. 

And it's not like I don't want to think about F/n. I just figure I can't do anything right now, so I figure I keep moving on. That's what she's doing anyway. It's been three days this is the longest F/n has ever been mad at me. Any other time we've gotten into a spat, it's only been for a few hours at the most we didn't talk. This now was just ridiculous. Again I blame Erwin.

"Okay, let's run it one more time," Petra said walking back into my room taking me out my thoughts. 

She was over my house again. Only because she was helping me practice and no there wasn't any more sex. And she was only here because F/n won't talk to me. And it was easier to practice with Petra and not Bella or Mikasa because Petra was in the play too, It just made sense. Though she was just an understudy, she still knew the play. And Petra is actually pretty sweet, and funny. I mean she's no F/n, but she's cool. 

"We have to go to the college in a few hours, I think that was good for now," I told her getting up.

She shook her head, "No way, we just started! if you wanna show these college guys, you really were the better choice, and you have what it takes you gotta practice!" 

"We're just going through the music today, and it's not like you're playing the piano and telling me how I sound." 

"True. But don't you wanna be so great that they don't have to give you any pointers?" She asked me smiling.

"I already am. And anyway I'm not trying to overdo it. We've practiced enough for today I got homework and stuff I want to get done before I leave out tonight." I told her.

Petra hung her head and sighed, "Fine; I can get your point. I'm just pushing you so hard because I know you can do great. I mean I don't know anyone there, but I think you'll play the best JD ever." She shook her head, " I'm just your biggest fan, so I gotta push you." 

That almost sounds like something F/n would say. I mean she always tells me to do my best, and she's my biggest fan and not to give up on my dreams and stuff. But she's not into plays like that so she wouldn't know my characters name. I shook my head, God I have to stop thinking about F/n for now and focus. She will talk to me when she's ready. And it won't be long. She was only upset when she said we weren't friends anymore; she didn't mean it. 

I looked at Petra, "Thanks for that but you don't have to worry. I know what I'm doing." 

"I bet you do," She answered me smiling. "Do you wanna go get something to eat before we have to leave out?" 

"Nah, I don't like to eat before I go. I'll eat something when I get back." I said.

"Oh... Um, you said you had homework, did you need any help with it?" She asked.

I had already stopped paying attention to her and was taking out my stuff to get started, "No. I'm good." 

Petra didn't say anything for a moment causing me to look at her. She looked frustrated or at lest flustered about something. "Petra?" I called out to her.

She smiled at me again putting her hands on her hip, "God, you know for such a good looking guy you're really clueless." 

"Tch," I clicked my tongue, "What is that supposed to mean?" 

"Levi, why don't we go out?" She said walking over and sitting on my bed. 

"What?" I raised my eyebrow.

She shrugged, "Everyone already thinks we go out. We both like theater and have so much else in common you cool I'm cool. You're smoking hot. I'm steaming hot. We get along great." 

"And your point?" I asked her.

She rolled her eyes still smiling. "Come on Levi, You know I like you, and I know you gotta like me too at least to some degree because if you didn't I wouldn't be over here and we wouldn't have had sex the other day. And we've been hanging out with each other, And we'll keep seeing each other every weekday at least until the show is over in October. But that's sorta getting off topic. My point is we should just go out." 

I just stared at her. I didn't expect her to ask me this. I mean I thought we were just going to be friends. I never really wanted any real relationship with her that was more than that. I mean hanging out with her was fun, and all and Petra is a nice good looking and cool person to hang out with. But to be dating her? Bottom line is she's not F/n so that the one main reason why I should say no. 

But F/n isn't even talk to me. 

And who knows how long she's going to keep this up?

I looked over at my window to hers. If I could just talk to her and get on good terms again, I would tell her how I really feel, so she knows, and dump Erwin. Oh, yeah that was another thing, Erwin. F/n is dating. She's moving on, and what happens if she doesn't talk to me again and this really was the end of our friendship. And what if I tell her and she doesn't fell the same way, that would just make things even weirder and I'd lose her, then I wouldn't have anyone...

"Are you thinking about it so long because of F/n?" Petra asked taking me out my thoughts. 

"Huh?" I asked playing dumb.

"F/n? I know the two of you aren't talking right now, and are usually so close. But if you were to say no is it because you like her or something?" Petra asked.

"No, that's not it." 

"I mean Levi it's fine if you do. I get it. You two have always been close and are like childhood friends it's bound to happen." Petra started to say. Why does everyone always seem to think that? Yeah, I had feelings for her, but that doesn't mean F/n feels the same about me. 

"I mean after she told me you were gay I thought it was a little weird and to find out she was lying about it I just figured she must like you and tried to make me not like you or something," Petra finished saying.

"Tch, F/n liking me? Have you forgotten she has a boyfriend now?" I snorted. F/n liking me? As much as I wish it were the case. It couldn't be any further from the truth especially now.

"Which is a good reason for you to get a girlfriend right?" Petra asked smiling at me.

I don't know; maybe she did have a point? If I just went ahead and started dating her it would be better then just me missing F/n for the rest of the school year. But I shook my head, "I'll have to get back to you on that. right now let's just finish our homework." 

Your Pov

It's been two weeks and a day now.

It's been two weeks and a day since I've spoken to Levi. 

He tried to talk to me for the first few days, but I didn't want to hear from him because I was still upset. But by last Tuesday I had calmed down. I mean maybe it was a misunderstanding, and he wasn't really dating Petra, and I had just really overreacted about him telling the guys to not talk to me. Well, I shouldn't say that as a question. I was angry about that, but I get why he did it...sorta I mean he just wanted to protect me from getting hurt that's all, I can't really get mad at him there. If I thought the girls who wanted to date him were just going to hurt him, I'd probably do the same.

The real reason I was so mad was the whole Petra thing. He had sex with her, and he didn't even tell me...Granted I didn't give him a chance either. I was just jealous and angry. And it's not like I could have told him, 'hey Levi I'm pissed off at you for losing your V card to Petra and not me. The girl who loves you, you know you're best friend? Oh, and by the way yeah Levi I'm in love with you.' 

So I had to use the whole tell the guys to stay away as a decoy. And it worked. So I should be happy. 

But like I said. I've cooled down a lot, and I miss him. He is my best friend why wouldn't I? And I need to talk to him. We gotta clear everything up; It's just been so long now I don't know how to talk to him. I mean I know how to talk to him, I just don't know where to start. This is the longest we've ever not spoken to each other. It's weird. I just wish he would try to say something to me now. But he hasn't called me anymore, and it's almost like he's ignoring me in class and in the hall now. 

But I'm not going to be the one to apologize because I wasn't the one that was wrong. I just wish he'd say something first. He's the one who's older than me so he should be the bigger person! I'm the victim here! I shook my head thought. It is Levi I'm talking about, and he's about a stubborn as they come, so the real chances of him saying sorry first is basically none existent. 

I sighed, I just have to swallow my pride. 

I swear Levi sucks. 

Speaking of sucking and swallowing, Erwin sorta sucks too. 

But it's sorta weird. On the one hand, he's super nice and super sweet. And just a great guy all around, but I don't know if it's cause he's a guy too. I mean it's not like he's trying to pressure me into sex or anything, but at the same time, it's kinda like he is? But I don't know; he just makes me feel kinda bad for not wanting to. It's just he looks so disappointed when I push him away. 

I haven't done anything with him, but make out. But I think he's getting tired of that? We've only gone out for these last two weeks, but I just feel like he wants to move faster, and I'm just not ready. It's not like I don't like him or think he's not good looking or anything like that either. It's just the idea of sex with another person is weird. I mean I've touched myself before, and all that is fine, but when you add another person to the mix it's just...I don't know. And Erwin just moves a little to fast for me. 

And anyway we're always in his car when that happens. And I defiantly don't want my first time to be in a car, And I know it sounds just like what Levi said Erwin was going to do, but it's not. Erwin still likes me. He's still sweet he's just a guy too...I guess.

This would be much easier if I could talk to Levi about it. 

I sighed again; I have no idea when life got this hard. 

"Tell me again why you still haven't made up with Levi?" Isabella said laying upside down on my bed, 

"I would have already," I told her while looking in my closet. "but now I'm just seeing how stubborn he can be," I said sighing.

"We both know that will last at least until you both are in your 60's," Bella joked. 

"Yeah," I shrugged, "It's just too strange at this point. You realize this is the longest we've ever gone without talking to each other." 

"Only cause the both of you make it strang," Bella said under her breath. 

"I'm not a fan of your little side comments," I told her in a monotone voice.

Bella sat up, "Then stop being stupid. You realize Furlan is over there talking to him. Just say the word, and I'll text him to open the window and Levi, and you can make up. And the universe can go back to normal." 

I rolled my eyes, "The universe is not in wack just because Levi and I aren't talking." Then I frowned,"Wait why is Furlan over there?" I asked. Bella was over here because it was Saturday and we were going to the beach. It was set to be like the last hottest day of the year, and everyone wanted to hang out a little. Usually, I wouldn't go to these times of things no matter how much I wanted to because Levi would rather stay at home then be around a whole bunch of half-naked wet unsanitary idiots; his words, not mine.

I, however, loved the beach and loved all things sunshine. And today was the perfect day to go out with friends. And I can do that now since Levi, and I still aren't talking.

But now I want to know why is Furlan at Levi's the only time he's over there is if they're going out. But Levi doesn't go out, at least not a lot. He's no shut-in, but he'd rather be at home on a Saturday then going out to do well... anything. 

"Furlan texted me saying him and Levi were going to be beach too," Bella told me.

"Are you sure? Levi hates the beach." 

"Well, apparently he doesn't hate it that much," Bella told me. "They're about to leave right now." 

Okay, so this is weird. 

I shook my head, "It's not like I really care. Let's just get ready Erwin is waiting for me there anyway." I told her after finally finding my bathing suit.

~~Later~~

it seems like everyone and their grandma was at the beach today.

We almost had a hard time finding a spot but lucky for us, or at least I should say for me Erwin had come with some of his friends even earlier and already had a spot for me. and as for Bella when we got here, she ditched me and ran for Furlan and Levi. 

Some girlfriend she is. 

Lucky me Ymir Krista and Sasha should be here later, so it will be a lot more fun when they get here for sure.

Erwin was alright though. or at least I guess for now he is.

I'll be honest I'm not a big fan of Erwin when he's around his friends. It's almost like he's trying to show off or something. He gets loud and just acts a bit weird. I just don't get it. Why does he feel like he has to impress them? He's already awesome. And Mike Reiner and Burt and the rest of them all look up to him already, again maybe it's just a guy thing. But Levi doesn't do that to Furlan and Eren, and them....buuut if I'm being honest Levi is way cooler then all of them put together. 

Speaking of Levi I saw him look over here a few times. He's not far from where Erwin set us up. In theory, I could just go up to him and say hey, but again I don't know how he would react. He might ignore me, or he might want to make up. It's so frustrating not knowing which one Levi has always been unpredictable. 

And speaking of Levi being unpredictable, for as long as I've known him seeing him shirtless always sorta throws me off. He's just so hot. And I haven't seen him in trunks and the sun like this since we were kids and there wasn't much to look at back then but now? Shit. How does he have an eight pack and he's in theater? It's unreal. I mean I know he works out and can be athletic. He even runs with me sometimes you don't see me with abs like that, It just never made sense to me. But I digress. 

I could be talking and making up with him, but I just don't want to end up looking like an idiot and pissing him off.

"You alright F/n? You've been sorta quiet; you need me to get you anything?" Erwin asked standing in front of me blocking out the sun. 

I looked at him. Erwin was nice looking he had a nice pack too. I shook my head, "Oh I'm fine. I'm just enjoying the sun." 

"You look kinda of out of it, you sure?" He asked.

I nodded, "Yeah, just chilling." 

Erwin smiled, "We're about to play some volleyball wanna join, I know you love a good game." 

"Nah, I'm good. I just wanna sit here and think." 

Erwin frowned a little and sat down next to me, "What's been up with you? You've been weird lately." 

I just laughed it off. Honestly, I didn't know what he was talking about the only weird way I've been acting that I can think of is not wanting to have sex with him. "Have not. Everything is fine." 

"I don't know I can't help but feel like your not telling me something, I mean you were cool the first week were out, but now you just seem a bit sad." 

"Erwin, I seriously have no idea what you're talking about I'm as cool as they get." 

"Is it Levi?" Erwin asked. 

"Huh?" 

"Is it because you haven't talked to him? I mean I'd be lying if I said I was cool with how close you both are, but I do actually care about how you feel, and I know the two of you go back further then I ever could," Erwin said looking over at Levi.

See this is why I say he's sweet because he is. What other guys say anything like that? I put my hand on his face and leaned in and kissed him lightly, "You're too nice. But no Erwin I'm fine. Levi and I are friends...And I do miss talking to him, but I'm not acting differently because of it." 

Erwin smiled at me, "You have F/n." 

"I haven't." 

He shook his head, "But you have, and now I feel like I gotta fix it." 

I snorted, "How are you gonna fix-" But before I knew it, Erwin stood up and threw me over his shoulder making me yelp.

"Put me down!" I said in a playful voice. I had no idea what he was thinking, but the sudden change in latitude was unexpected and made me laugh.

"I'm making sure my girlfriend is happy and if that means she has to talk things out with her best friend then so be it. Even if the said best friend is a pain in my ass." 

What? Was he walking us over to Levi? "Wait Erwin hold on." I panicked I didn't even know how Levi would react! What was he thinking!

"Ackerman!" Erwin yelled. Oh my God, he's gonna be so pissed! I struggled in Erwin's grip I needed to run away!

"Tch," I head the familiar annoying click, "What do you want Smith." Oh, God Levi was pissed.

Next thing I knew Erwin put me down, "F/n and you need to talk. Don't you think you guy have been boycotting each other long enough?" 

I looked at Erwin, "Why wo-" 

"We should all let them have a minute. We were about to start a game of volleyball you all can join," Erwin said ignoring me smiling talking to everyone else but Levi.

"Sounds fun if you ask me," Furlan said getting up with Bella in tow.

"Gald someone decided to be the bigger person for those two," Eren said getting up. 

They all actually started to leave us! I can't believe them! It wasn't a big deal that we hadn't been talking! OMG!

"You two make up now and when you're done come down to the water with the rest of us!" Erwin yelled out as they all ran off. 

Why do I have friends like them?

I heard Levi clear his throat making me look back at him. I sighed, did I mention Levi had the perfect body? Because he does and seeing him stand here was quite an experience. I shook my head to myself; this isn't the time to be thinking like that. I should be making up with him.

But this was awkward neither one of us were saying anything...

I bite the inside of my cheek, "Levi." 

"F/n." 

We both spoke at the same time. 

"Okay, you go first." 

"You go first." 

We both spoke at the same time again.

I sighed again, "Same time?" 

Levi nodded. 

"I'm sorry." 

"I'm sorry." 

Levi and I both said sorry at the same time. I hung my head smiling. I swear we are such dorks. 

Levi went to sit back down on his towel, and I sat next to him pulling my knees up to my chest. "I shouldn't have overreacted like that." 

I felt Levi shake his head, "No, I shouldn't have been telling the guys to leave you alone." 

"You were only doing that to protect me. I can't be mad about that. I would do the same," I told Levi.

"Oi, but didn't you already? You told Petra I was gay right?" He asked.

Shit, I forgot about that, it came back to him? Shit. I put my head on my knees wishing I could disappear. "Yeah, it was to protect you I guess." I lied.

Levi didn't say anything for a moment. "It's fine. I really didn't mind. But it was weird when Jean came up to me telling me he didn't see me like that." 

I snorted, "Jean turned you down?" 

"Yeah, I almost couldn't believe it either." He joked. 

"Marco must really be packing for him to turn you down." 

"That's what I figured." He added.

We both laughed a little. See this is how you know we're best friends we can go back to joking just like that. I can't believe I was acting scared to talk to him again. I'm such an idiot.

I took a deep breath leaning my head on his shoulder "I really did miss you, Levi, I am sorry I got so mad." 

"I missed you too loser, but it was really my fault." He said.

It was. 

But I didn't say that out loud. 

"Let's just agree to tell each other the truth about everything and not fight again, and if we do never for that long again, okay?" 

"Agreed." 

It felt like a weight had been lifted off me. I'm so glad we were talking again. 

"So how has Erwin been treating you?" Levi asked.

I shrugged, "He's fine. He is a good boyfriend as you can see, he's the only reason we're talking right now." 

"Tch, bastard," Levi said.

I laughed, "I don't see how that is a bad thing, but okay Levi." 

"Whatever," He said shifting a little.

I sat my head up, "But speaking of how people are treating us how are you and Petra?" 

"I wasn't dating her." He informed me.

"Oh? And I saw you pounding into her why?" I said. As much as it pained me to act like It wasn't anything, I felt like I had to still bring it up.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," Levi told me.

But I played it off, "It's fine. I just never knew you liked her so much, I mean you lost your virginity to her you could have least told me you were planning on doing that, but it's no biggy things happen. I'm just surprised you said you're not dating her." That I said telling the truth. I was happy he said he wasn't dating her! I know it's selfish and I am with Erwin right now, but I still want Levi single.

Levi didn't say anything for a moment, but then he cleared this throat, and I could see his ears turning red. "Petra wasn't my first F/n." He told me.

I blinked at him a few times... "Huh?" 

"I had sex before two weeks ago with Petra." 

I sat up on my knees, "What? And you didn't tell me?" 

"Well, no." He answered plainly but I looked at him to continue I couldn't believe what I was hearing! "Well, I didn't think I had to tell you." 

Part of me was angry, and a part was sad. I didn't really know how to respond to him. I shook my head, "When? Who?" I was pretty much at a lost, but I did want to know. Man, I swear Levi has been going around living his life, and I've been just being Mary Sue!

"It was Hanji...at a party-" 

"Foureyes guy hanji?" I asked confused. Hanji was a guy! Is Levi really gay? What is happening?

"Hanji isn't a guy, they're nonbinary," Levi said. "I've told you this before." 

"No, you haven't I didn't know you had sex already-" 

"Not that, about Hanji." 

I shook my head, "Okay, whatever but when did this happen?" 

"It was at a party I went to when you were visiting your dad one weekend like a year ago, and everyone was playing seven minutes in heaven and Hanji, and I got picked, and one thing led to another," Levi told me but he shook his head, "I'm not trying to get into the details with you F/n." 

"Wow," I sat back down. "I don't even know if I know who you are anymore." 

"It's not like you noticed. It wasn't a big deal. The only reason I just told you to now since we just agreed on no secrets." 

"Well, I guess that makes sense no secrets," I said in a small voice. I still couldn't believe it.

"You're not mad are you?" Levi asked looking down at my face. 

I shook my head putting on a smile, "No, why would I be?" I was actually sad about it. But there isn't anything I can do about it now. I just have to move on. So I shrugged, "Well, I don't have any crazy secret I'm still holding on to my v-card. No random tattoos or anything." I joked. The only secret I have is that I'm in love with him. But I can't tell him that. 

Levi didn't say anything for a moment, but then he spoke up "You're lying about something." 

"I am not." 

"Tch, you are." 

"I am not!" I said smiling. Levi always knows when I'm lying. But I can't tell him the truth cause the thing I'm lying about is what's keeping our friendship together.

"I don't care." He said getting up.

"Why are you even here Levi?" I asked him standing up next to him. Half out of being curious half out of being annoyed that he can read me so well, and wanting to change the subject.

Levi seemed to freeze when I asked him that. Now, what was it?

He turned to me, "It's another thing I-" 

"Hey! Hey! Levi!" We both heard someone's voice yelling out to him making us turn out heads. 

It was Petra. She had on a cute two-piece swimsuit on and was running our way. She finally caught up with us. "Hey, I am so sorry I'm late I couldn't find anywhere to park for the life of me." She said smiling. Her attention set on me. "Hey F/n. Wait, have you two made up?" 

"Ugh, yeah," I said giving her a shy smile. Why was there this familiar sour feeling developing in my stomach?

"That's great!" She said hugging me out of nowhere. 

Okay. Weird.

Petra then moved to Levi grabbing his arm and moving her lips to kiss his cheek. "I swear the weather here is so nice today." 

Okay. Weirder.

"Petra can you give F/n and me a minute?" Levi asked scratching the back of his head and trying to avoid eye contact with me. We just started talking, and there was something else I had to let her know." 

Petra smiled, "Sure thing babe, I think I see the guys playing over there." She started to head off, "Don't you guys take too long!" 

I know without a doubt there is another part of me in another universe on another plant screaming. 

Levi was still avoiding looking me in the eye. Well, don't act coy now Levi.

"Babe? She just kissed you on the cheek too. If you asked me, those are girlfriend and boyfriend things, Levi." I said folding my arms. "And You just said you weren't dating her." 

Levi rolled his eyes, "You asked if I was dating her when we had sex, and that was no. I am dating her now, as of a week ago." 

I think this is what dying feels like.

"Oh, Well you should have just said that," I said acting like I was brushing it off. In my mind, I was not brushing this off.

"You look upset," Levi said.

"I am not upset," I told him.

"Now you, look like you're lying." He said with a little smile on his face.

"You seem like you wanna get beat in a game of volleyball," I said walking off now. I needed to do something to get my mind off the road of insanty that it was no doubt about to spiral down.

"F/n!" Levi called out to me, but I Ignored him.

"We can't leave everyone waiting. We've been up here long enough," I said. Yeah, I just couldn't be alone with him anymore like that right now. I need to cool off.

And what better place to do that then a beach right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> That was a lot to take in lol. But on the bright side Reader and Levi are talking again. Bad news they're both in relationships now. Whatever will they do???
> 
> Thanks a bunch for reading!! If you like this story you should leave a kudo or a comment and tell me some of your thoughts I'd love to know what you think! Or even if you have an issue let me know I'll see what I can do constructive criticism is always welcomed too!! 
> 
> Again thanks a billion!! <3
> 
> xoxo


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whaaat? After a million years I posted? 
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING! for the closer to the end of this chapter there a scene of a sexual assault in it so if that's not your thing just skip over it :)

Levi Pov

"Get your head in the game Jaeger!" F/n yelled at Eren after he missed the ball giving the other team the point.

"Jeez, would you chill, F/n it's just a game" He yelled back.

"I'll chill when you stop playing like a bitch." She retorted hitting him with the ball.

F/n was clearly upset. Or at least she had something on her mind, and she decided she wanted to keep it to herself. I just want to know what it is she has nothing to be angry about, that's the weird part. I almost think it's about me dating Petra because she wasn't acting like this until she found out. And now it's like she's driving herself in this game to keep her mind off something. The worst part is we just made up. I don't want her getting angry with me again, so I won't press it. But it would be less a pain if she did it herself.

And It pisses me off to no end that it was Erwin who made her come over here.

That bastard.

I hope he doesn't think he's fooling me with this nice guy act. He only did that so she would think he's nice, and like the idiot F/n can be she's falling for it. 

I looked over at them as they took a break. Disgusting.

Erwin was all in her face. What could they even be talking about? I sighed, I swear seeing them together just makes me want to throw up. How could she think being with him was a good idea? He's a jerk football player. I bet he's just loving the fact that he's with her and I can't do anything about it. Because it would just make her mad, and I don't want to risk her not talking to me again. Or for at least right now. We did just makeup.

But thinking about us making up, F/n had the worst timing in the universe. 

Why did she wait so late to talk to me? Shit. I know can't blame it all on her. Why didn't I just say something? It had been two weeks, I should have been man enough to say that it was getting ridiculous, and on top of that, it took that asshole Erwin to make us talk to each other again. What was wrong with me? I should have said something to her sooner...Then I wouldn't be in this mess. I don't know what I was thinking when I told Petra I'd go out with her, and now we're in a relationship. Fuck. It might have just been me overthinking that F/n would stay with Erwin and forget about me. Maybe I did it to get her attention. I don't know, I just thought it was a good idea at the moment. 

And now I'm paying for it. 

I should be happy that shes and I are talking again, and even though I said I would tell her how I feel now. It wouldn't be right to do it now. I'm supposed to be with Petra. And she's with Erwin, and I'm her best friend she expects me to be happy for her, I'm supposed to support her not try and brake her and her new boyfriend up. No matter how much I hate him.

This was becoming more of a mess then I think I can handle.

"Okay, who wants to go for another round?" F/n yelled out smiling. 

"You make the game to serious F/n," Eren told her. 

Everyone else shook their head in agreement. F/n did go all in. I know she's competitive but she gets even worst when she's upset, and by the way, she's been playing I know she's angry about something.

"You guys just suck," She teased them.

"No, you're crazy mean whenever we play anything F/n. You take all the fun out of it." Bella told her laying on Furlan. I just nodded.

F/n rolled her eyes, "You guys are just mean." 

Just then Erwin moved behind her putting his hands around her waist and kissing her neck, "Aw, don't be angry, but it's the truth you're kinda scary when you play." 

F/n just laughed with him.

Tch, I rolled my eyes. I swear I hate him. 

"So what's the plan? Are we staying at the beach all day?" Ymir asked.

"I'm having a party at my house," Reiner spoke up, "You all can come over, I got a pool too, plus my parents are out." 

"Your parents are always gone," Kirsta spoke up making everyone laugh. 

It was true. Reiner was always having a party at his house because his parents were gone. I've even wondered about it, I just don't know how he doesn't stay in trouble. If it were F/n or me, we'd be in shit for the rest of our lives if we had a party.

"A party sounds fun," Bella spoke up. 

"Yeah, I'm in," Furlan said.

"Yeah, we're in right Levi?" Petra asked nudging my side.

Shit.

I forgot about her.

Honestly, Parties weren't my thing. I mean they can be fun, but being around everyone like that is exhausting. Hell, the only reason why I'm here now is that I heard F/n was going to be out here with Erwin, and I wanted to keep an eye on her. And it just made it convent Petra asked me too, so it was just a good cover-up. In reality, I hate beaches. They're dirty. Too many people, too hot. Just a number of things wrong

"No," I told her plainly. I was really ready to go home. And seeing F/n with that asshat just made me want to get out of here faster.

"Oh, come on Levi, It would be fun!" Petra protested. 

I shook my head, "it won't be fun with you not there big bro!" Bella said, then she looked over at Mikasa, "Tell him to go," 

"You're asking the wrong person," She said rolling her eyes.

"You're right, F/n! Tell him to go with us to the party." Bella asked her.

"Yeah, F/n tell Levi it will be fun," Petra added in.

F/n smiled, "Levi isn't really the party type guys, he'd much rather be at home." 

"Tch, I can say the same for you," I spoke up. F/n didn't like parties either. We'd both honestly just stay home and play Mario cart or something, we've only been to one party together, and someone threw up on F/n, and after that, she swore off parties forever. I don't know why she's acting like she wants to go to one now.

"I mean you're not wrong." F/n started.

"Wait you are coming tonight?" Erwin asked looking at her.

F/n shrugged, "I mean I don't know."

"It's going to be fun, I'll be there." He insisted.

F/n looked a bit uncomfortable, "It's...Ugh...I" F/n had something to say but looked nervous. I bet she didn't want to go but didn't know how to say it.

"Weren't you going out with your mom tonight? I remember you talking about it a month ago?" I asked her. She looked like she needed an out. Since I'm her best friend that's where I come in.

"You know I think you're right, I totally forgot about-," F/n started, but Petra butted in, "How about the two of you come and just leave a later, I mean it won't be fun if you guys aren't there. And Levi you've been working hard this week you need a minute to just have fun with everyone." 

"Did he tell you, guys? He got the lead in the play at that college!" She told everyone.

I rolled my eyes, why did she tell everyone? I don't like everyone knowing my business.

"Oh, you got the part!" F/n yelled running up on me. 

I'm not going to lie. F/n in a bikini was nice. And I had peeked at her a few times. I don't think she realizes it but she perfect. And speaking of perfect. Her breast differently was. And when she hugged me I won't lie, I liked the way she felt on my chest.

I shook my head. I can't think about her like that right now, "Yeah, I got it. It's no big deal." 

"What do you mean it's no big deal? This was your big shot, and you got it!" She exclaimed. "You're halfway in Hollywood!" She joked stepping back. I won't lie knowing that she was so happy for me was a nice feeling.

"He put so much work into it. I'm so proud of him, we go to practice every day, and we practice before we leave out," Petra cut in by grabbing my arm, why was she so annoying? "So I think he should take a night to just have fun don't you?" She asked looking at F/n.

F/n pushed her hair behind her ear, "Yeah, sure. I mean do whatever you want Levi," She looked away from me, and back to Erwin, "I'll be right back, alright?" Then she started to head away from everyone.

Now what? I got up to follow her, but Petra stopped me, "Where are you going?" 

"To see F/n." 

Petra just frowned, "Jeez Levi, Remember she has a boyfriend he can take care of her."

"Hey, don't worry about man, I'll go see what's up," Erwin said following her. 

Shit. 

I hate this. 

Why did it have to be this way? If I had just told her earlier how I felt maybe things wouldn't be this way now.

Because now I just feel like shit. Erwin out of all the people. I should be the one walking over there to her, but him. This was a fucking mess, and it was my fucking fault. I fucking at myself for this. And if I stay quite like this, I know it will only get worst. 

Shit.

This was just a shit show for sure.

Your Pov

I can not believe he is dating Petra!

Like I thought I saw it coming, but I did not see it coming! I was relieved at first when Levi said he wasn't dating her, but I didn't think he would turn around and be dating her, god I cannot describe how upset I am about this. And worst? It's mostly it's all my fault! 

I was the one who pushed them together! I just know it! If I had kept my big mouth shut in the first place, none of this would have happened. And now here I was in a relationship that I honestly didn't want to be in anymore, because let's be real Erwin is great and nice and sweet, but he's not Levi. Levi is the only one I really want to be with, and now I have to watch him with someone else. And I bet he likes her a lot too, why else would he be here? Any time I said I wanted to go to the beach, he'd say no. But I'm 100% sure the only reason he's out here now it because she wanted to be. 

Shit, I don't know why I was so stupid. I should have just told him how I felt long before now. I bet getting rejected would feel a lot better than seeing him with someone else and him not knowing the truth. Ugh, just seeing her all over him. Fuck! I could just barf right about now. And the worst part is I can't even be mad at Petra; she's too nice. She hasn't even done anything wrong. I'm the only one here with the real issue. And it sucks ass.

I just needed a minute to myself and not look at them together. I was walking to the ice cream stand it was the only place out here that I could think of. Because beach bathrooms are gross. And Ice cream does always make me feel better.

Just then I heard someone yell my name, I looked over to see Erwin running towards me. 

"Yeah?" 

"What happened you walked away so suddenly?" He asked me.

I shrugged, "Nothing, I just wanted ice cream." 

Erwin put his hands on his hips, "Are you sure? You're not upset about anything right?" I just nodded at him. It's not like he's a bad boyfriend. Like I said he's just not Levi. I shook my head, If I keep thinking about this, I'm just going to end up making myself cry or something. Besides, I should be happy for Levi, right? I mean he is still my best friend, and if Petra is the one who is making him happy I should be all for it right? I'm supposed to be supportive.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I told him.

Erwin moved to hug me, "Well, that's good to know, but are you sure you won't come to Reiners tonight? It will be fun." I was taking back a little from him hugging me, but I get why he hugged me, maybe I was acting weird. Seeing Petra all over Levi did put me in a sour mood. I sighed, I really didn't want to go, but now it's sounding more fun cause I know they'll be drinking, and with all this stuff going on with Levi I could use a drink. I should be happy for him. It's the right thing to do. But God did it make me feel like shit.

"You know what, Sure why not?" I told him pulling away. It was nice that Levi had covered for me, It was things like that, that just makes me love him more. It's just when he does things like that I can't help it. He cares, and he knows me. He knew I didn't want to go without me even saying anything. He's my best friend! Why wouldn't I want to be in a relationship with my best friend? It just made sense. Me and Levi made sense why didn't he think so?

"So Ice cream?" Erwin asked away.

I smiled at him, "Yeah, I was getting kinda hungry." Erwin went to pay for it, and I tried to stop him, But he put his hand up. 

"It's my treat," Erwin said winking at me. I just smiled back, I don't know why Levi hates him so much. Erwin is sweet and nice. They used to be so close, I know Erwin said it was because Levi told him not to ask me out, but that couldn't it. They were friends, and now Levi is convinced Erwin is the worst person in the world.

"Hey, tell me what all happened between you and Levi?" I asked Erwin as he passed me an ice cream cone.

Erwin frowned, "I told you, it was because of you." 

"I know, I know, " I said shaking my head, "But like Levi hates you, it can't just be that." 

"Well, it was pretty much a mess when it happened. And besides, I told you he likes or liked you, so I'm sure it was mostly him being jealous," Erwin shrugged off eating his own ice cream. 

I snorted, trying to ignore the pain I felt in my chest from what Erwin just said. "No, that couldn't be it. Levi has just always been my friend nothing more. It had to be something else, Erwin." 

"I don't know how you couldn't see it," Erwin said eating his own ice cream. "But it's whatever now." 

"I mean, yeah but I can't help but wonder..." I said under my breath. I don't know I just want the details. Levi is convened Erwin just wants sex and is this terrible person, I personally just don't see it. I mean he has tried taking things there, but when I shut him down he seems okay with it for the most part.

Once I got back down to where everyone was else I saw everyone had gone to start another game. Even Levi joined this time. Since when does he want to play? I mentally groaned it but have been because she asked him, although she wasn't out there playing.

"They all must have started playing since we've gone," Erwin said laughing next to me.

"Whatever I was not that bad," I told him. Everyone likes to act like I'm the worst person to play with, but I am not. Levi is. 

"Get your head out of your goddamn ass Yaeger!" I looked over at them and saw Levi yelling at Eren just like I was earlier. I laughed to myself. See, that's what I mean. Levi is worst than me!

"You and Levi are really on the aggressive side that's for sure." Erwin laughed, "But I'm going to go play you finish up your ice cream and come over." Erwin told me going back with everyone else.

I watched them all continue to play. I kinda wore myself out mentally. Levi really did put a lot on me just then not only is he dating her, but he also told me that he wasn't even a virgin that day when I saw them together. He actually lost it to hanji... I can't believe he never told me that until now. I had thought we told each other everything. We just didn't have secrets he was the first person when I got my first period, shit he was there when my mom was buying me my first bra for fuck sake, Levi even told me when he first started growing hair and had his first wet dream, We shared everything! When did we stop? Or at least when did he stop? Cause the only thing I'm hiding from him is my undying love for him. Other than that I thought we were close I swear to god he's just full of secrets now. It kinda makes me want to know what else he hasn't been telling me.

Or maybe that was the problem too? We might be too close, and at this point, he just doesn't and can never see me like that. That I'll always be like a little sister to him. I just want to know what he thinks of me now...is that too much to want? 

"Still taking a breather?" I looked up and saw Petra standing over me. 

Not a person I really wanted to see, but none the less I smiled, "Yeah," I have to be nice, she is Levi's girlfriend.

She smiled back warmly, How the hell could she be so bobbly? "So I've been wanting to talk to you for a bit now, but with that whole you and Levi not talking thing it made it harder, but now it's cool." She said sitting down next to me.

"Oh?" 

"Yeah, First off your swimsuit is adorable." She told me.

"Gee, thanks," I said, looking away from her. What does she want?

"And isn't it nice to just relax right?" She said.

"Look, Petra. Not to be rude but I'm not really in a talking mood. So can we skip the small talk?" I asked giving her a little smile. I just wanted her to leave me alone already. 

"Oh," She looked taken back for a moment, but then she cleared her throat. "Well, I was just seeing how you were. If you really were okay with me dating Levi, I know you said he was gay and all, but I couldn't figure out if you said that so I'll leave him alone and you really liked him or what." 

Yes. 

"No," I shook my head telling her.

"You sure, cause I know how close the two of you are," she added.

"If I had an issue I wouldn't have a boyfriend now would I?" Ugh, why do I say things?

"Good point, Well now that we got that cleared up, you have to give me some pointers with him, he's so mysterious," she said.

Yeah, and I thought that was his good trait to keep girls scared of him. "Can't really help you there. Levi is just Levi." I told her. If she wants help with Levi, she's going to have to find it from someone else. I can't help my enemy!

"F/n you're going to the party?!" I heard my name called out and saw Levi walking closer to where we were sitting. "Yeah, what of it?" 

"I thought you didn't want to go?" He asked sounding irritated.

"I changed my mind," I answered him. Why does he even care? 

"Tsk," Levi rolled his eyes.

"Hey, if F/n comes isn't that more of a reason for you to come to Levi? Petra asked him.

He rolled his eyes again, "No, I'm not going because F/n is going." 

Petra looked disappointed. 

"But I'll go cause you asked," He spoke up, "But we won't stay long." 

Petra beamed jumping up and wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him. I looked away. I...I didn't really need to see that. Or hear that for that matter. I was right he must really like her if he's willing to step out of his comfort zone...It's strange, I've always had the feeling Levi would be a great boyfriend. I just thought he's a good boyfriend for me. 

Petra is a lucky girl, I can for sure say I'm jealous.

~~Later~~

Levi Pov

I was at this party that I have no business being at, and neither does F/n. But she decided she still wants to act brainless and come so here I am. 

F/n doesn't think it, but Erwin only wants her for sex I just know it. Why else would he come up to me and ask me to step off her and just not be as close to her as I normally would? That asshole. I could have just socked him then and there, but F/n wouldn't believe me. She'd just get made again. And speaking of her getting mad. She still isn't over whatever upset her earlier.

And how do I know, you might ask?

Because I'm watching her shoot down like her fifth jello shot. 

"You need to chill out, f/n," I told her walking away from the wall I had been watching her from.

F/n just smiled wide, "I'm just getting started, Levi." Then she winked at me.

I sighed, why is she acting like this? I've never seen her act like this. Yeah, the two of us have drunk before and gotten into our fair share of drunk trouble for it. But she doesn't drink a lot ever and not like this. She's only been to one party in her life! "F/n slow down." 

"She's fine. F/n is having fun you should be too!" Bella said practically jumping from the wall. 

"Tsk, would you get her?" I turned to Furlan, but he was missing now. What the shit? I looked back to F/n and Bella and saw they were gone. What the hell man? It was beyond annoying. I shouldn't even be here F/n shouldn't even have her (skin color) ass here. 

I was about to leave the room and look for her, but I heard my name called out, making me turn to see Petra came back. 

"Hey, babe! I found us some drink, I swear, I didn't know how big Reiners house was. And on top of that, I didn't even know her knew these many people!" She said yelling over the music handing me a beer.

"Really I could just go for some water," I told her. I didn't want to drink. Especially with F/n running around like this. And the moment I find them all I'm taking them home. "By the way have you seen F/n?" I asked Petra.

"Yeah, she was dancing with Erwin just now. Do you wanna go dance?" She asked.

I shook my head no, but she pulled on my arm anyway, "Come on it will fun it's not like you can't!" she said. 

"I'm looking for Furlan and Bella," I said giving her an excuse.

"We can find them later." She said kissing me while she moved said to side once we go into the room with the stereo. I get it. Petra wants to just have fun, but I can't focus right now since I can't find anyone. And I don't like it. There are too many people here. A lot I don't even know, anything can happen to her. 

Petra deepened the kiss, making me focus on her. I wonder if she's been drinking? Or what she thinks of me. All day I've been asking about F/n, I guess this is her way of saying she wants me to pay attention to her. Which is fine, I guess. I don't mean to be a shitty boyfriend, but it's hard when in all honesty I don't really want to be in a relationship with her.

But none the less, I was still making out with her. She smelt nice. And I have to at least act decently to her. Petra pulled back, "Have I told you how good of a kisser you are?" 

"No, I don't think you have," I teased her back.

"Well, you're pretty good." She teased back. 

Before I could say something else we both started to hear cheering come from the bar. We both looked over. Only to see F/n laughing down laughing while Erwin was doing a belly shot off her. 

I'm going to kill him.

"Ha, that looks like fun, wanna try it?" Petra joked. I didn't respond. "But who knew F/n could have so much fun right!" 

I was about to go stop this, but f/n had already sat back up and was making out with Erwin. 

I groaned, "Wanna go outside for a bit?" I asked Petra. 

I can't keep looking at them like this, it's gonna drive me crazy Petra nodded taking my hand. 

Your Pov

"Everything was a bit fuzzy, but I know what I'm doing. Levi and I've drunk before. As a matter of fact the first time we drank we were like 12 I had found my mom stash. We had gotten into so much trouble. And the worst part it wasn't even good! So I know I'm alright. I've only had like two jello shots anyway." 

"Sounds like Levi and you got into a lot of trouble growing up." I looked over and saw Erwin who was standing next to me.

"Did I just say all that out loud?" I asked him.

"Yeah, but it's cool are you alright?" He asked me. 

"I'm just fine." I told him, "But some air would be nice or water, or anything really." 

Erwin laughed, "You're something else that'd for sure." 

I think we both were heading to the door in the back, but before we could even head all the way out, I could see Levi and Petra already out there making out. 

Gross. 

"On second thought. Erwin can we just go somewhere quiet and sit?" I asked him. If I have to see them together one more time, I think I'll go crazy.

"Yeah, I know just the place," I heard Erwin say and honestly Everything was getting so heavy I wanted to just sleep. Maybe He'll take up to a room where I can lay down for a bit. 

I don't know why but it felt like it took him forever to get us into this room with a bed, but once we were there, I hopped in the bed. 

I wasn't too drunk that I couldn't see the room was huge. "Reiner's parent's have to be loaded. What the hell do they do?" I said out loud.

"No idea," Erwin said walking further into the room.

I moved to stand up on the bed, "If only I had a room this bed," I said jumping now.

"What are you doing?" Erwin asked.

"What does it look like?" I giggled, "Come on I know you wanna too!" 

Erwin didn't budge. 

"What are you chicken?" I asked still jumping.

"And are you four?" Erwin teased. 

"Whatever, if you won't jump then catch!" I yelled, jumping at him, and just like that he caught me. "Erwin is so strong." 

"Thanks, I try," He said smiling.

I felt my face get hotter, "I said that out loud again?" 

He nodded. 

I noticed he was looking at my lips and biting his lip. Did he want to kiss? We've been kissing all night? But he did catch me just now, it's whatever. I moved to start to kiss him. Erwin's lips are soft. And he smells good. Although we've made out his tongue is still weird to me. Erwin laid me down on my back was still going at it, but now he moved down to my neck, and it felt like he was just going lower and lower...What was I wearing today?

Oh, that's right my bikini, and I put on a skirt when we left the beach. 

Wait, one of Erwin's hands is squeezing my boob...It's nice...but I'm not sure...It's...strange..his hands are so big...specking of big...I can feel his...member on my thigh...his pants are still on though...What is he? Oh! his other hand is...on my!

I sat up pushing him away sitting up. "No, thank you!" I yelled at him.

Erwin looked taken back, "What's the matter?" 

I was breathing quickly, but still, in a haze my current situation was dawning on me, "I don't want to..." I trailed off. I still wasn't ready to have sex with him.

Erwin groaned in frustration, "Why not?" 

I looked away he was still straddling me which was weird he is a lot bigger than me. "I'm just not ready." 

"What are you a virgin still?" He asked bluntly.

My face was on fire, "Well, yeah." 

Erwin got off me, "Don't you wanna have your first with me though?" 

How do I even answer that? "I...I...Well, I don't know." 

"Come on," Erwin said moving to kiss me again, I wanted to protest again, but he was just so much bigger than me...I don't know what to do. 

I pushed him with my hands, but it didn't seem like it was working. He just moved closer, I tried to ask him to stop, but he didn't...What's happening? Why is Erwin doing this? Is he drunk? What's about to happen to me? He can't, someone! Anyone, please. I'm scared. 

The next thing I know the door slammed open. 

And Levi was standing there.

"What the fuck are you doing Smith!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks a bunch for reading!!
> 
> I am extremely sorry it's taken so long for me to post this! If only you've known how long this draft has been waiting to get finished for this chapter! It's just I've been going through a writer's block and I literally don't have any days off from my two jobs. So really lately I've been only working and sleeping for like the past month. 
> 
> But with that said I will still do my very best to finish this and my other Levi x reader story If anything I'll try and post one chapter a week and switch between the two, But I can't say for 100% definite that it will get down once a week because again ya girl is tired.
> 
> But I really do hope you've all been well and are taking care of yourselves, and that you enjoyed this chapter!
> 
> until the next one!  
> xoxo


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter Yaaay!!
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING there's a lot of mentioning if sexual abuse in this chapter

Levi Pov

"What the fuck are you doing smith?" I yelled moving towards F/n.

"Levi," F/n said sounding tried, with this look in her eyes I wasn't used to seeing.

"What's going on in here? What did he do? Did he hurt you?" I asked her pushing Erwin off her.

"Get out of here Levi!" I heard Erwin yell at me, but I ignored him. 

"F/n are you alright?" I asked holding her shoulders looking at her face, she seemed shaken up, but still out of it, but I could tell F/n was shitface drunk. She looked like she bearly knew what was going on...and she looked scared. I could tell that much from how she was holding my shirt.

I was seeing red, I know what I heard before I came in here. It was F/n telling Erwin to stop. And he wasn't, he didn't he was gonna...I turned to him, "What the fuck was you doing to her?" I snapped at him. I could kill him; I was going to. He tried to force himself on her, while she was too drunk to even talk to me. I stormed to him punching his face before I could even think about it. 

"What the fuck is wrong with you!" I yelled at him throwing another punch, but before I could, Erwin had already droved tackling me down. I don't know how long we fought. I was so angry I wanted to see his blood. 

Your Pov

No matter how much I tried I just couldn't focus enough figure out what was going on.

Well, I knew Levi was fighting Erwin, but why wouldn't he stop. I kept calling his name out but they just wouldn't break up. And to make matters worst; I just feel sick. I wanted to go home; I needed to stop them, why hadn't anyone else stopped them?

I did my best moving to them to break them up. "Levi, Erwin, please stop," I said trying to pull whoever was on top away, but I'm not sure who's elbow it was, but I felt it hit my chest making me back up, "Shit," I said holding it in pain. 

This was a mess, I'm pretty sure I'm drunk, and everything just keeps spinning. 

"Fuck, F/n!" One of them said. 

I wanted to say something else, but I don't know if my words were coming out clear, I just feeling sicker and sicker, whoever it was put there hand on my back, "F/n?" I heard them call out my name, but I think I was just a little too out of it. 

"Levi," I gagged, "I don't feel-" And I started to throw up. I felt someone pull my hair back, aw that was nice of them. I threw up a little more, but once I was done I felt tired, I just wanted to sleep. I started to sit down, but instead, I felt like I was being picked up off the grown.

"I'm taking you home F/n." 

Levi Pov

I don't think I've ever been this angry in my life.

What the fuck was wrong with me? Why did I stop looking for her? Why did I let myself get distracted? When I was looking for F/n just now I just so happened to walk by this room, and I heard her telling him to stop, and from it sounds like she was struggling against him. And to think she was, while I was down there with Petra. If I hadn't made it when I did he would have...I don't even want to think about it.

I shouldn't have let her come here, shit. 

I was walking to the door, I glared back at Erwin who hadn't said anything, "Don't you ever come near her again." I told him walking out. I can't focus anymore on Erwin right now. She needs me right now. I got downstairs and started to head to my car. Furlan could take care of himself and Bella, and Mikasa was here with Eren and Eren knows better than to do anything too stupid. It would be okay to just take her home right now.

"Levi where did you go- Oh what's wrong with F/n- Wait! Why are you bleeding? What happened? Levi!" Petra asked a million questions.

"I'm taking her home, I'll see you later," I told her leaving out the door. 

I just wanted to get her home, that was all I cared about right now, I shouldn't have let her come here, I should have stopped her when I saw her drinking. I could have done something, Shit. I hit my steering wheel; this was my fucking fault. She doesn't even like fucking parties. She wasn't going to come. What changed? I looked back at her in the back seat. 

"What were you thinking?" How did she even end up upstairs with him? She wasn't even wearing that much still basically still in her swimsuit she just had a skirt on now, Erwin wouldn't have even had to try hard. "Fuck," I hit the wheel again.

How did I let that happen, who's to say how far he even got? She was fucking drunk. 

Shit, I should have hit him harder. 

Once I got home, I decided she can just stay over mine tonight, her mom won't mind. Plus it would be too much trouble to try and get her in her room when she's out like this, not to mention the explanation I would have to give. I have no idea how she would react. If I could just get to my room without any trouble, it would be fine. When I picked F/n up out the car, she just stirred a little in her sleep. 

I sighed, I guess it was nice to know she was resting now...She wasn't thinking about what just happened. 

I went ahead inside my house with her, I was halfway upstairs with F/n when the light came on, Shit.

"And what are the two of you doing?" My mother asked. 

Damnit. She's supposed to be sleep. 

"Nothing." I snapped not turning around.

"Excuse me, the two of you get down here now, and Levi put F/n down," She told me.

I just turned to her, "I can't do that right now, mom. F/n is sleep I was about to lay her down." 

"Levi, what happened?" My mom asked shocked, walking closer now, "Why are you bleeding?" 

"Fuck," I said under my breath. Now that I think about it Petra did mention that I was bleeding. I didn't even care back then when she told me. "I'm fine," I told her ignoring my mother and walking faster up the steps, she was trying to pry if she saw what F/n was wearing she would make up some story, and it would be almost impossible to tell her the truth, and she believed. 

"Levi?" 

"I'm fine, I'll talk to you in the morning!" I told her getting to my room and closing the door.

I laid F/n down on my bed. She was still sleeping soundly. That's good. 

I took a deep breath, that was a lot.

Fuck. 

I shook my head and moved to my mirror I saw I had a cut on my face. It wasn't too deep, but it was bleeding. Or it had been bleeding. It was dry now. I also saw blood drops on my shirt. I hope it's some or Erwin's too. I can't believe him. I knew he was nothing but trouble. I fucking knew it. I should have done more. I was so fucking mad at myself. I hit my dresser. God, I didn't realize I was so stupid!

"Levi?" I snapped up and F/n's voice. 

I turned to her, she was sitting up, rubbing her eye, "Where are we?" 

I walked closer to her and sat down next to her on my bed, "Back home," 

"Where is Erwin- You're bleeding!" She said reaching out for my shirt.

I stopped her,"I'm fine are you okay?" 

"Me?" She said holding her head then laying back down "I'm tired." 

"Figures." I sad watching her. She seems so peaceful now. Not like she just was when I walked into the room. The way she had my shirt. She was scared. I hadn't seen her like that in a while. And just like back then I almost felt helpless. I'm supposed to keep her safe. That was part of my promise to myself...To her, I'm not supposed to let anything happen to her. I sighed, what's so different now? 

I moved to get up I needed to change my clothes, I needed a shower. But before I could, F/n grabbed the bottom of my shirt. "Don't go," She looked up at me.

How could I say no? "I have to change my clothes F/n," I told her.

Slowly she let go, "...Don't be long," She said closing her eyes again.

I nodded, I could shower in the morning. I went ahead and changed my shirt and pants. Once I did, I turned back to F/n. I couldn't help but notice...she needed a shirt. I went ahead and pulled a shirt out and moved back to my bed. Slowly I tried to sit her up to put my shirt on her, "Levi, I think Erwin-" 

"You don't have to tell me," I cut her off. I didn't want to hear it. Not from her. I laid her back down. 

"I'm sorry, did you leave Petra to take me home?" She asked me.

"It was no big deal," I answered her laying down next to her. 

"I'm sorry I'm such a pain," she said.

"F/n, go to sleep. It's fine." 

I felt F/n move and grab my hand, "I love you, Levi." 

I snapped my head at her, "Wh-" But her eyes were closed. 

She didn't mean it like that. I should know that.

I shook my head bring her hand to my lips, "I love you F/n." 

Your Pov

I wasn't ready to get up, but I could hear the birds outside singing. 

I hate it when they do that. It's so annoying, why can't the birds shut up? I groaned finally opening my eyes, only to open them even wider looking at who I was laying next too. And currently had my arms wrapped around. Not to mention he had his arms around me. 

Levi...

I was laying on Levi's bed. And we were all cuddled up to each other. I could feel my heart starting to beat faster. But I didn't dare move. I could feel I still had my clothes on, and he was wearing a shit from what I could see. 

Ahhh, the more and more I sat like this the more I understood the situation. Levi's hand was on my but! I could feel it. What was going on? What happened last night? Last night? Wait...yesterday?...What happened?.I remember swimming at the beach, Levi and I made up we went to a party. And that's it. I can't remember anything after that!

I didn't do anything I hope! But I need an explanation! Why was I in bed with Levi! 

I started to sit up, my heart couldn't take this. As nice as it was to be so close to him like this, it was wried not knowing why, or what happened. I was gonna try and wake him up, but Levi just stirred in his sleep pulling me closer. 

And then I felt it.

I pushed him away as a reflex, "Levi!" I yelled out

Omg. I can't believe I felt Levi on my like that! What the fuck is going on?

"F/n, what the fuck," Levi asked in this husky voice. 

I was sitting up facing away from him, "You're thing! It touched me." I told him. 

"My thing?" He said sounding confused, "Shit." I felt Levi move away from me. "I'm sorry F/n I didn't mean too- I-" 

"It's fine!" I yelled at him still not turning to look at him. 

It was a while that he and I didn't say anything to each other. Like, I don't even know what to say. I can't remember anything from last night. It's like a blank. And I can't believe I woke up in his arms like that. What if we...no. I shook my head, Levi doesn't even like me like that why would he? And I'm wearing what I had on yesterday just his shirt too. I'm sure I was cold or something and put it on. 

"How are you feeling F/n?" Levi asked me after a while.

"I'm...ugh, I'm fine, I guess," I answered.

He didn't say anything, and neither did I. 

I don't know what's going on. We've slept in the same bed before...granted it's been a while, but even then we've never woke up like that before..."Um...Levi..What all happened last night?" I asked him.

"Wait, you don't remember?" Levi asked sounding a little shocked.

I shook my head, "No," 

"F/n look at me," Levi said. 

I turned to him, I couldn't help but notice he was only in his boxers and a T-shirt and with his messy bed hair, he was just adorable. "You really don't remember anything from last night?" He asked making me focus again.

"No, I don't" I answered, "I didn't do anything crazy right? I remember after the beach we went to Reiner's party nothing happened after that right?" 

Levi moved closer to me, "F/n, you-E-" It was like Levi wanted to say something, but he didn't know how. Which is weird for Levi, because well it's Levi. He's straightforward. 

I sighed laying my back down on his bed, it must be something bad, "Don't tell me I ran around naked or something?" 

"F/n, Erwin tried to force himself on you last night," Levi said.

I snapped up looking at him, "What?" 

"Don't make me say it again." He said not looking at me.

"No, I heard you I just don't believe you." 

"Why would I lie F/n," He stated.

I shook my head, "I don't know maybe because you hate him, but he's not that type of person." I told him. Erwin wouldn't do something like that. Nothing like that would happen to me. And how does Levi even know? 

"I know what I fucking saw F/n. You have to go to the police or something." He told me.

"What-" I shook my head, "Levi, no I- None of this-Nothing about this makes any sense Levi, I would remember!" 

"You were blacked out drink F/n, you don't remember." He snapped. 

"Then why would the police even believe me?" 

"Because I saw him, I walked in and pulled him off you," He said. 

I was getting frustrated. Why couldn't I remember any of this? I looked at Levi then I noticed a cut on his face...it wasn't there yesterday. 

"I'm sorry I wasn't there before he could have tried anything," Levi spoke up softly. 

I was breathing heavy, "I have to go." 

"Where are you going?" He asked.

"I have to ask Erwin where is my phone?" I asked him.

Levi frowned, "I don't know and even if I did you're not talking to that asshole." 

"I need to know what happened last night." 

"I told you after I got you out of there I brought you here. That's it," He answered.

"No, I have to ask him what he did." 

"You don't, why do you need the details," Levi asked sounding frustrated.

I could feel the tears forming in my eye, "Because I don't fucking know what happened last night." 

"Levi! F/n! wake up and come here!" 

Levi and I heard his mom call our names. 

This couldn't be the worst time. 

"Shit," Levi said under his breath. I watched him moved to his dresser and pull out some clothes, "Here." He threw me some pants while he put on some too. "She saw me bring you home last night, she must be wondering what happened." 

"You can't tell her about Erwin," I told him.

"Why not?" 

"Because you can't!" I snapped at him.

"I can and I will, someone needs to know F/n." 

I walked over to Levi once my pants were on grabbing his arms. I didn't want his mom to know, and then she'd tell my mom, and it is a whole mess about something I can't even remember. "Please Levi, just don't. Do this for me." I pleased with him.

"Fuck F/n, I'm trying to help now," He said pulling away from him.

"Then don't say anything," I snapped at him.

"You both get down here!" His mom yelled again.

Levi went ahead and left without saying anything else to me. Shit. 

That was all I could think following him down to her. 

"Well good morning you two," His mother said sitting in their kitchen drinking what I'm sure was tea. "F/n? What's the matter with you? You look terrible." 

I feel terrible. "Nothing, I just woke up that's all." 

Kuchel didn't look convinced. "You two were out late last night," 

"We were at a party," Levi answered. 

"Okay well, that explains that now what about all that blood Levi?" She asked him. No doubt now he must have gotten that from Erwin or something, but I can't even remember that happening 

"Some idiot was drunk it was just an accent, anything else. Or are you done?" Levi snapped. Wasn't he gonna say anything? I'm not complaining.

Kuchel sighed, "I was just seeing what was going on, you kinda had me worried last night." 

"Everything is fine, you worry too much," Levi said. 

"Yeah, it's all good." I added, "But if that was everything. I am going to head home." I told her.

Kuchel nodded, "Yeah, that was it." 

I mustered up a smile and was about to leave, but Levi called out to me. "Are you...I'll come over later," 

I just nodded at him and left out. 

There was so much on my mind, I needed to figure this out.

Levi Pov

"You sure she's okay?" My mom asked again once F/n left out. 

"She's fine," I lied. Why wouldn't F/n let me say anything? 

I was to see Erwin pay for that stunt he pulled last night. He had no right to mess with her. This was all my fucking fault. There were so many things I could have done, and none of that would have never happened. I was about to go back to my room, but my mom cleared her throat.

"What?" 

"Don't what me boy," She snapped. 

"Ma'am?" 

"When are you and that girl going to start being more serious? Or are you two already? You know it's okay if you guys kiss in front of her mom and me, we don't mind. We've been rooting for you two since forever now." My mom said.

"Tsk, it's not even like that. F/n and I are friends that's it." I told her.

"You think anyone Believes that?" 

"It's the truth," I told her.

She laughed, "You're a bad lier. You've always been one at least to me Levi. Why won't you just admit it?" 

"There isn't anything to admit," Snapped this was annoying. I know how I feel about her and there is anything I can do to change our situation now. If I had fucking said something before, that wouldn't have happened last night, so again it falls on me.

She took a sip of her tea, "You say that now, but anyone who knows' the two of you would know you love each other more the friends. Hell, you came here with her and haven't even asked about your sister. You won't be happy until she starts to date someone else then it will be too late for you." 

"It's already too fucking late!" I yelled hitting the wall. I didn't need her saying what I already knew. It was too fucking late, I waited too long, and Erwin almost had his way with her. 

"Woah, what was that about?" My mom asked standing up. 

"F/n is already dating some asshole who doesn't deserve her," I yelled without giving away what happened last night. 

"Aw, Levi." My mother said, "I'm sure it's ju-" 

I graned pinching the bridge of my nose, "It's nothing. it's fine." Then I went ahead and headed back to my room. 

Once I was back in there I saw F/n had closed her window. I guess she really needed a minute alone.

Fuck. 

I wish I knew how to fix this. I wish I knew how to make her feel better.

~~Later~~

I just couldn't remember what happened that night. 

It was now Monday morning, and that means in a few hours I would be at school, and I would see Erwin, and I could ask him what happened, maybe it wasn't anything big...But what if it was? 

I shook my head I can't think about that right now. 

I put my running shoes on by the door. I was going to go for a quick run before I got ready for school this morning. I didn't have one yesterday, and honestly, I could really use the air to clear my head. I opened the door to outside only to be surprised, Levi was leaning on my porch.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him. Levi, for the most part, is a light sleeper, but he does like his sleep so waking up earlier isn't really his thing. 

"I'm running with you." 

"It's 4 am," I told him

"You're the one who wakes up at this time if you're not gonna run go back to bed," He snapped. 

I smiled at him, same old him. "Fine, just keep up," I said closing my door and taking off. 

After yesterday I never opened my window to talk to Levi. He did try to come over, but I was sleep, so I guess my mom sent him away, I didn't want to talk I just needed yesterday to rest. But I guess I'm just glad now Levi isn't talking about what happened. 

"Did you not get a hangover?" Levi asked me as we ran.

"Nah, I don't think so I feel fine." I told him, "If I'm honest though I might still be a little buzzed." 

"You drank that much? It was a day ago." He said.

"I know," I said. 

We ran in silence for a little while longer. 

"F/n, what are you going to do?" Levi finally asked after a while. 

Part of me knew he was going to ask something like this, "I don't know, nothing." 

"I don't believe you. What are you going to do when you get to the school?" Levi asked me.

I stopped I didn't want to think about this right now. I turned to Levi, "I don't want to talk about this now. Can't we just act normal." 

"What is normal for us F/n?" Levi asked.

I frowned, "What do you mean, we can talk about what we always talk about." 

"We hadn't talked for two weeks before Saturday," Levi said.

I looked away he had a point, "I don't know whatever we were talking about before that." 

"F/n do you feel like something- like something isn't right between us maybe missing?" 

I shook my head, "No, Never." I lied. But deep down I know something is wrong. There seemed to be some much wrong with us right now. Like my real feelings for him, but I can't tell him because one it would ruin us, and two he has a girlfriend now. And not to mention this Erwin shit that is going on right now. 

"There's nothing you want to tell me?" Levi asked looking into my eyes.

Where was all this coming from now?

I shook my head, "No. Is there anything you want to say to me?" 

Levi looked like he was going to say something but decided not to say it, and started running again.

What was all that? 

~~Later

Levi drove us to school this morning. 

It's been a while since we've done this. But I don't know if it's from what Levi said this morning, but something about the air between us just isn't the same, and I hate it. Is it really because I like him and won't tell him? Is it my fault? Because that's what it feels about it. 

I don't know what I should do...

"F/n!" I heard my name called out when I got out Levi's car. I saw it was Bella.

"Ugh, morning!" 

"You haven't answered any of my calls." She told me.

"Well, actually I lost my phone Saturday," I told her, I couldn't find it anywhere yesterday, so I guess I left it at Reiners I was just going to ask him if he saw it. But I doubt he did so I'm probably going to have to ask for a new one. 

"Hey, Big Bro!" Bella said to Levi. He just nodded at her, "Where is Furlan?" 

"I haven't seen him this morning, but more importantly, F/n tell me what happened with Erwin?" Bella asked.

My eyes went wide, did everyone know? "What do you mean?" 

"Well, if you had your phone you would have seen it," Bella said.

I felt a pit in my stomach, "Seen what?" 

Bella shook her head and started to drag me off. "Bella where are you taking F/n?" Levi called out following us.

I have a bad feeling about this. 

"Levi!" We all stopped when we heard his voice called out, it was Petra.

I don't know how I keep forgetting about her. We watched her catch up with us, "Levi, thank god you're okay, I've been messaging you all yesterday," 

"Sorry, I was busy." He told her.

She just smiled at him giving him a hug and a quick kiss. "It's fine I get it, but next time just check in, you had a bloody face last time I saw you I was worried." I looked away, I really hate seeing them together. 

"F/n, I'm glad to see you awake now," Petra said laughing, "You must have partied really hard cause Levi had to carry out leave me." 

I gave her a pity smile, "Sorry, I didn't mean to take your date away from you." 

"Speaking of dates F/n come one!" Bella said pulling me with her again.

"Bella wait," Levi called out.

"Let them go, Levi, let's catch up!" Petra said stopping him from following us. I really wish he would just stay with me, but I guess he does miss Petra. 

I went ahead and let Bella pull me all the way to my locker only my locker didn't look like it would usually. 

It was flowers and balloons and just...a lot. A box of chocolate a card. 

"What the hell?" I said out loud. 

"I'm pretty sure this is Erwin's doing, now I just wanna know what he did that was so bad?" Bella said laughing. 

So did this mean he really did...I shook my head no. I don't know. I picked up the card to read it.

~I am so sorry F/n, words aren't even enough to explain how sorry I am. I was drunk, and I wasn't in my right mind. I 1000% understand why you wouldn't want to talk to me ever again. But I pray you can find it in your heart to just hear me out if not that's okay too, but if you wanna talk I'm a text away.~~~ Erwin.

I looked at the card. 

So something happened, but he seemed sorry for it...I just wish I knew what all happened.

"Oh, wow that's a lot." I looked behind me to see Levi and Petra standing there. It didn't go unnoticed by me that the pink shade of lipstick Petra was wearing was on Levi...Just ignore it F/n. 

I went ahead and started to walk away, I need to get to class. This is all too much, Erwin. Levi and Petra. Everything. 

"F/n!" I heard Levi call out to me, but I didn't care. I needed a second.

But Levi grabbed me anyway, "You're not going back to him just because he says he's sorry," 

"I don't know what I'm doing Levi," I snapped pulling away from him and just going into the girl's bathroom. At least in here, no one could mess with me.

But just as I walked in and started to splash water on my face, someone cleared their voice behind me. I looked in the mirror it was Petra. Why can't everyone just leave me alone?

"Hey, we need to talk," She spoke up.

"No offense but I don't really feel up to it right now," I told her.

Petra smiled, "That's fine. It's more me talking anyway. I just want you to chill out with Levi." 

"What?" 

"Look I get it, the two of you are friend and all, but you're just...too close you get it? I mean he chases after you all the time. He gives you ride to school and stuff I just want him to care about me a little a more you, ya know? So just chill out you have your own boyfriend now go to him." She smiled then she walked out. 

I can't even believe she said that too me.

But next thing I knew she walked back in, "And I'm sure Levi agrees, it's more because you two have been friends for so long he doesn't want to come off and be mean, but it's time don't you think?" Then she left out again.

...Was that true?

Was I too clingy to Levi? Does he want to be closer to Petra and I'm in the way? I never even thought of that...I mean granted we haven't even talked since they've been in a relationship before Saturday, what...changed...I

Levi wants to be with Petra. If he didn't, we wouldn't be with her. Levi isn't the type of person to do something he doesn't want to do, that's just the way he is. Maybe this is it. Were just growing apart. But why now? If this keeps up, Levi will be with Petra and forget all about me...That's what going to happen, and I'll be alone I don't want that.

Well, Erwin still wants me. 

Levi Pov

F/n has been to herself all day. 

I hate this. 

I want to talk to her to make her feel better to do anything, but I don't know how.

I was done with my classes for the day I was on my way to F/n's locker. I need to see how she's doing. I can't believe Erwin put all that shit up there like it would make things better. F/n is smarter than that. 

Or so I liked to believe. 

Getting closer to her locker I saw her standing there talking to Erwin. 

"I thought I told you not to come close to her Smith," I told him getting closer. I still couldn't stand to see him.

"Levi stop," F/n said standing in front of him.

"What the fuck are you doing F/n?" 

"It's complicated, but it's okay we both were drunk. Neither one of us knew what we were doing. Erwin bearly remembers what happened himself. Plus look at him you gave him a black eye, it's okay," F/n said.

I closed my eyes for a moment. Then I looked back at F/n, "I heard you, in that room. You didn't want it. Drunk or not he had no business messing with you. That's the end of is. you have nothing else to say to him." 

"Levi clam down," F/n spoke up.

"I get is Levi you're angry, I was wrong I know that much but I promise nothing like that will ever happen again," Erwin said speaking up. "And I'm sorry for fighting you. I don't know where my head was on Saturday night. I'm just glad F/n is giving me a second chance." 

"You can't be serious," I asked her. Why was she still giving him a chance?

"Levi it's alright. it works out better this way." She said giving me this weak smile, what works better this way?

"Can't you just be okay with this?" She asked.

These where my choices.

It's either I'm not okay with it, and we don't talk Or that I am and I have to just watch them together.

Shit.

No life is worth living if she's not in it.

"Tch, Fine."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks a billion for reading!!
> 
> I really hope you all enjoyed this chapter, it seems like reader and Levi's relationship just keeps getting more and more complicated. But don't worry they'll have there moment's in time. 
> 
> I have a lot of good things planned for this story, so as a fair warning if you think this is rough wait till we get into the later chapters *evil laughs 
> 
> Anyway, you all are the best and again thank you for reading!!! 
> 
> like when I say you're all the best I mean it THE BEST your comments give me life and I cry tears of joy I'm just so thankful you all enjoy these little stories I like to come up with so much you're all the real MVPs and I can never thank you all enough. Ahhh!!! thank you!!! thank you!!! thank you!!! ~see it's still not enough lol
> 
> but now ya girl is going to bed because the sun is looking at me and i have to go to work at 11 and it's 6 now so until the next chapter <3
> 
> xoxo


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What two chapters? in the same week?

Your Pov

"What the hell was that?" Ymir asked looking at me while I tried to catch my breath.

"What was what?" I asked her.

"You sucked, I mean you did the routine, but you just sucked," She said sounding amazed.

I frowned, "What? I did everything ri-" 

"No, you did just ugh, it wasn't right," Ymir said scratching the back of her head. "Haven't you danced like all your life? You know I put my neck out for you to get these tryouts," 

"So what are you saying Ymir?" I asked her feeling this upsetting feeling. I hope she isn't gonna say what I think she's gonna say. I did my best, hell, I feel like I just rocked that 

Ymir rolled her eyes, "Coach isn't gonna put you on the team like that." 

"But this is all I've wanted!" I pleaded with her. "This is all I have left right now you have to talk to her!" 

"What is that supposed to mean?" She asked.

I groaned out in frustration, Why was everything in my life going to shit and so fast? What did I do to anyone? "I just needed this. Okay."

"You have been acting weird lately, what this all really about?" Ymir asked.

"It's nothing." I snapped. "Do you know for sure the coach is saying no?" I asked getting back on the subject.

"Well, I don't know, but I wouldn't count on her calling you back," Ymir told me, "Seriously F/n though, something is up you gonna talk about it or are just gonna sit and have a pity party." 

Honestly not the idea of not making the team was pissing me off, and I didn't feel like being around Yimrs brash personality any longer, "I told you it's nothing." After telling her that I went ahead to the locker to change. 

I can't believe I won't make the dance team...I had been looking forward to it this year, especially after this whole thing with Levi...I mean the idea was for me to get into something to keep me busy since he's in his musical, and now that he has Petra just made the idea of me getting a hobby sound better. But now it turns out the one thing I thought I was good at I'm actually shit at.

What else am I supposed to do now? 

God, I want to cry.

I swear everything is going to shit. This isn't supposed to happen senior year; I'm supposed to be having fun. I should be with my best friend. But, no he's with his new best friend/girlfriend and apparently, he thinks I was taking too much of his time. Since Petra told me that I really have been trying to give them space. I don't want Levi to think I'm needy and I can't live without him. So I've been telling him I'll drive myself to school so he can give Petra rides there and stuff. It sucks but...As long as he's happy I guess. It's the least I can do; I mean if one of us is gonna be happy I'm glad it's him. Levi deserves it.

I know he tried to cover it up, but most of the time he feels like he has a lot of responsibilities, he's been like that since his dad first left them when Mikasa was still little, and his mom was so depressed. I remember he didn't really say much back then about it. He felt like he had to do everything for them, But I knew how angry and sad it made him, and I know that's why he never brings him up. Especially since we first started high school, he's always felt like he wasn't doing enough for his mom and sister. So that was another reason why this musical at this college was so important to him. He has a really good chance of getting a nice scholarship, and that mean's his mom won't worry about college and him. Also, he's mentioned fewer bills if he moves out and lives in a dorm.

Dorms, college? Moving? Shit, I sorta forget that's a thing now too, after next summer we'll both be off to college, and the chances of us going to the same school are rocky. What would I do If I looked at my window and didn't see his room? I sighed, This was just a mess. Levi was my everything...but I can just see as time go on we're just going to deft apart...And I hate it. 

"What are you doing idiot?" 

By now I had made it out to the front of the school, and I was just chilling under one of the trees. I just wanted a moment to myself. Plus Erwin was my ride this morning, so I was waiting on him, but the voice made me open my eyes I looked over to my right and saw Levi standing there looking at me; thankfully Petra wasn't with him.

"What are you still doing here?" I asked him

Levi lightly kicked me, "I asked you first." 

I rolled my eyes, "Waiting for my ride, Erwin drove to school this morning," 

Levi clicked his tongue. Usually I would groan or something, but honestly, it was nice to hear him make that noise no matter how annoying it is. I think I just miss being around him. "Such a pain, come on you can come home with me," he said walking off.

"Really?" I asked him feeling a little surprised. I stood up to follow him, "Petra won't be mad?" 

"Why would I care if she's made or not?" Levi asked plainly.

I shrugged sarcastically, Levi is such a...Such an ugh I don't know, it's something; Iand he sure is it sometimes, "Because she's you're girlfriend." 

"Oh, yeah." 

"Oh, yeah?" I asked him back.

"Sometime I forget." He said nonchanltly.

"Some boyfriend you are." I snorted. I highly doubt he forgets I'm sure he's just saying that to be funny. "I hope you feel like you have to give me a ride just case we live next to each other," I said.

"Since when is that an issue?" He asked getting to his car.

"Since you said it was." I answered him when we both got it. 

Levi frowned, "I didn't say anything like that." 

Why is he denying it now? "Anyway, thanks for the ride," I said changing the subject if Levi didn't want to talk about it I won't press it. I just want us to have a moment with each other, and we're not arguing. Or tell each other what we should do with our lives.

"How's has the show been coming along?" I asked him.

"It's fine; you should watch one of our rehearsal. I think you'd like it." 

"Well, seeing you jump around dancing is always funny as hell," I teased him.

"Tch, I don't have any real dancing parts, just a lot of singing." 

"Aw, that's no fun then," I said playfully acting disappointed. 

"But you should come to check us out, I know you'd like it. You would like the people at the college I work with. There loud and annoying so I know you'd get along with them." He said. 

"Haha, very funny," I said dryly. "You think you'd go to that college?" 

Levi shook his head, "No, it's just a nice stepping stone, plus I need to go to a university, not a community college." 

"You know most of the teachers say community colleges are good to go to first then you move up to un-," I said. I know he won't change his mind about what he's going to do, but I can try. 

"Since when do I give a shit what they have to say, I got everything planned out already." He said cutting me off. 

"I guess you do..." 

"Have you decided on anything? You know that university I was going to is really good...I read they have a decent dance program if you wanna keep at it, or you could be like me and go into their art program is the best there is in the state that's why I'm going," Levi asked, "As a matter of fact didn't you have that tryout for the dance team today? How was it? Are the dances going to be too easy for you? Or do you finally have a challenge?" 

"So you just assume I made it?" I asked him feeling a bit flattered but also disappointed.

"Are you saying you didn't?" Levi asked glancing at me.

I didn't answer.

"Tch, the dance team is shit anyway, they would have just made you look bad," Levi said.

I smiled a little, "Thanks, Levi." It was things like that just keep making me fall deeper in love with him. 

We bo.th went into a comfortable silence. Maybe I should. Go see him practice. It might be fun; it would give me something to do. I know today Erwin had to work anyway, so he won't really mind. "I might just pop with you to the college," I told him. "After all, I haven't seen you do anything practice anything yet, and I'm supposed to be your number one fan, I've been doing really bad," I told him.

"Yeah, I heard the fan club was thinking about kicking you out," Levi joked with me.

I shrugged, "What can I say I've been busy," 

"Tch, more like just not caring." 

I rolled my eyes, "I still care, I've been busy." 

"Busy hanging out with your boyfriend? I saw all those pictures he posted with the two of you last weekend hanging out." Levi said with this tone in his voice I couldn't quite place.

"Like I said I was busy, I didn't think you'd care that much, Plus you have Petra now," I told him.

"Tch, I care when it comes to him, I don't trust him. I don't know why you do, and Petra is okay, but it's still different with you," He said.

Different how? I wanted to ask him, but I shook my head "Can we not get into this?" I said, I already saw where this conversation was going, and I didn't want to go there. I want to be around Levi, and we are normal and not talk about Erwin or Petra.

"Fine," Levi said, "But you're coming to the college with me." 

"That's fine," I said. 

We were pulling up to our house and that's when I noticed a car sitting on the street, "Shit." 

Levi Pov

"Shit," F/n said under her breath as I pulled into my driveway I looked to see why she said that, then I noticed the car that was on the street. 

"Shit." 

It was F/n's dad. 

He must have been over their house.

I looked back at F/n, she didn't seem upset on the outside, but I know she had to be going crazy, "You can come over, you don't have to go home." I told her.

She looked like she was thinking for a minute, "I should see if everything is alright, you know see why he's here if she's okay." 

"I can go in with you, or instead of you I can go see," I told her.

F/n smiled, "It's okay Levi, it's just my dad." Then she got out my car and walked to her house. 

I watched her go inside.

I don't know about this. F/n relationship with her dad was rocky. 

. They weren't always like that I can think of a time when they seemed like they really loved each other, but one day it went to shit. I'll never forget it. It was back when we were like 12 or 13. By then her mom and dad always seemed to argue all the time to simply put it they weren't a good match anymore. I remember her mom would talk to mine about what was going on, her dad had started cheating it was honestly a mess, and F/n was caught in the middle of it. Then one day It got so bad her dad was beating her mom F/n said she tried to stop him, but he pushed her away. That's when she came over to get my mom; she was so scared. I couldn't forget it, would never forget it. The way she cried, how she begged my mom to help. 

I shook my head focusing on what was going on now. That was years ago, and if I'm honest since they've broken up and her dad moved out everything seemed to be getting better...As long as her mom and dad weren't in the same place that is. And he's over there now. I don't know why f/n feels like she has to be strong and carry all her emotions on her shoulder. I don't know how she can't see I want to help...I want to be there for her.

I got out of my car and started to head over to her house. I don't like leaving things to chance especially with all that shit that just happened with Erwin. But right before I could knock F/n walked out. And she didn't look happy.

"What happened?" 

"They're in there fucking." She snapped pushing passed me heading toward my house. 

I groaned following her. 

F/n made her way inside my house and went to my room. I slowly followed her. She threw stuff down on the floor and threw herself on my bed smothering her head down screaming into my pillow.

"F/n," I called out to her.

"Why the fuck are they in there doing that, and they hate each other? Levi, they despise each other, and all this is going to do is make shit worst. How can they not see that?" She sat up looking at me.

I didn't say anything; I knew she just needed to vent out. So I just leaned on my door and listened to her, But then she started to cry, "It's like everything is against me right now, I can't get a fucking break!" 

I hated seeing her like this. I walked over and sat next to her on my bed, "I'm not against you." 

She only snorted in response. 

"F/n," I started "I-" I shook my head to myself this wasn't the time. So instead of saying anything, I hugged her. That's what she needed. She needed to know someone was still here for her, That I was still here. I noticed the last week she was drifting away from me again, saying she was busy or some other excuse. I don't know what's up with her, but I won't lose her. Even if we're not together like I want us to be, I still want her in my life.

After a while, F/n pulled back wiping her face, "Sorry, I got your shirt wet," She said pointing to the spot she made.

"It's fine." 

F/n looked away from me, "Ugh, thank you." 

"What friends are for?" 

F/n smiled, "Being a pain in the ass is one thing for sure." 

"Then you must be my best friend then," 

F/n stuck her tongue out at me; I just looked away giving her a little smile. "Pass me my laptop," I told her.

She got up to get it then brought it back, "What are you pulling up?" 

"My play, we can watch the movie it came from first," I told her.

"Nice, I'll go make some popcorn." She said leaving my room while I pulled up the movie. 

F/n is still trying to act tough even though she was just crying her eyes out. She does this. I know she doesn't like it when anyone sees her cry or sad like this, even me. But sometimes it becomes too much. And afterward, she tries to act like nothing happened. In a way, I guess she is strong, who knows how long that had been building up. I just wish she didn't have to go through all that. And I bet not getting in the dance team really didn't help. Those idiots, F/n, was the best dancer in our school. She's been taking classes since she was like 6. 

F/n walked back in my room popcorn in hand, "Ready, to get this party started?" 

"You better not get popcorn everywhere." 

~~Later~~

"Omg, I love it." 

"I figured that after the third time you said it while we watched the movie," I told F/n. We just finished the movie; I knew she'd like it. It had that dry, dark humor F/n thought was funny in it. And F/n made it clear how much she liked it by letting me know once we had only gotten about 30 minutes in 

"Omg, and you're playing that main guy? What are the songs? I gotta hear them! When is your rehearsal? I have to make sure you're doing a good job this just became my favorite movie," She said cheesing.

I love it when she gets stupidly excited like this; it's cute to see how passionate she can get about things. She's always been like this, and I've always admired it. The way she can just express herself. How I can always know how she's feeling just by looking at her, she wears her emotions on her sleeve something I've always had an issue with. At least to do it so naturally. 

"We should actually be living out now," I told her putting my laptop down.

"Oh goody! This is so exciting." 

"Quit acting like a kid." 

"Hey, technically we're still kids since we got till December so I can do whatever it is I want," she said getting up too, "By the way, is um...Is Petra going to be there? I thought she might come here while we were watching the movie." 

"No, she's out of town for the next two days, something to so with her family," I answered her.

F/n nodded, "Oh, so we just hung out cause she's not here." 

I frowned, "No, you know you can come over whenever you want when she's here or not. You have key for a reason." I told her walking out to leave.

"Yeah sure, and I'm pretty sure your mom gave me that key for emergencies only," F/n said walking down behind me. 

"Tch, Everything about is an emergency." 

"I know right." 

Your Pov

It was nice hanging out with Levi today, minus the whole part about me crying. That was just a moment of weakness that I couldn't stop. Although it does kinda hurt knowing we're only hanging out cause Petra isn't in town. Who knew I, F/n his best friend would turn into some rebound, but I won't complain out loud. I just want us to keep acting normal. 

Levi and I were now driving back from his practice, and I have to say he really did shine out on the stage. I've seen Levi do plays in our school, but something was different about this. Levi really belonged up there. "You know I'm proud of you Levi," I said out loud.

"Huh?" He asked glacing at me.

"You heard me jerk; I'm proud of you. You're really good on the stage; I'd go as far as to say you're the best one there," 

"You think so?" 

"Yeah, you just seem like you knew what you were doing," I told him.

Levi didn't say anything, I rolled my eyes, "This is the part where you say thank you F/n." 

"Tch, I was getting to that." Levi looked back at me, "Thanks." 

I smiled, "You're welcome." 

"Tomorrow you can come to watch us do the second act," He said.

"Oh, yeah that's the act you die, is it hard to die on stage?" I asked him.

"Well, I sorta blow up so no not really," He answered.

"Is there anything hard in the show you have trouble with?" 

Levi tilted his head, "No not really," 

"Figures Mr. Perfection," I teased him rolling my eyes. That sounds like Levi; he gets everything right first try. But then I remembered a thing from the show, "Oh, but what about that little sex scene you got?" 

"Tch, it is not a sex scene," I could hear the annoyance in his voice.

"It was too." 

"It wasn't." 

"Okay, then what do you call it?" I asked him.

"It was just too people grinding on each other with clothes on." 

"So dry humping?" I teased him.

Levi looked over at me, "For someone who frecking out because my dick touched you in my sleep you're pretty straightforward." 

I gasped at him, "We're supposed to forget like that happened." 

Levi laughed a little, "You're such a child." 

"And you're a jerk," I said.

Levi and I didn't say else until we got back home. I noticed my dad was still there. I guess that means I was going over Levi's. I honestly don't know what they're thinking. Mostly my mom. She says how much she hates my dad, and how she's going to go find someone else, but she never does. And the same goes for him. It's like this everytime. They either argue and fight, or they go have sex. is a cycle with them, and I don't know how either of them can take it.

"You coming F/n?" Levi called out to me.

I was walking slow, so I speed up walking into Levi's house after him.

"F/n?" I heard Mikasa call out.

"Hey!" 

"Long time no see, I didn't think you came over anymore." She said sitting on the table in the kitchen.

"Now, why would I stop coming to my second house?" I joked with her. 

"Cause you and Levi are stupid," She stated plainly.

"Tch, get your ass off the table," Levi said cutting in, "And where is mom?" 

"Beast me; she went out for a while. Wheres that girlfriend of yours?" She asked.

"None of your business." Levi told her, "Let's go up." He then said to me then headed upstairs." 

I waved to Mikasa, "You staying the night or are you going over Erens?" 

"I haven't decided yet." She said, "You doing alright; I saw your dad's car was outside." 

I smiled at her, "I'm fine. I'm just hanging out with Levi. It turns out I'm his rebound when Petra isn't here." 

Mikasa didn't a clear expression on her face, "You two are idiots."

I smiled at her, "You always say that." 

"Because you two are. It's annoying, why won't you just be together?" 

"Mikasa it's not like that. It's difficult. Levi is my best friend. We've been that way for well, forever. I wouldn't want to try something and screw it all up. Levi is like the most important person in my life..." I shook my head why am I telling her all this, I'm making it sound like I really like him. I smiled a Mikasa again, "We're just friends." 

Mikasa didn't say anything, so I headed up to Levi's room.

He was just sitting on his bed when I got in there. "So whatcha wanna do now?" I asked him.

"What were you and Mikasa just talking about?" He asked.

I shrugged, "Nothing really, just telling her to chill out with the name calling," I jokingly lied.

Levi stood up and walked toward me, "I wanna try something." 

"And what is that?" 

"Don't get mad." He said.

"Don't do anything I'd get mad at," I told him.

Levi looked at me like he wanted to say something but he thought against it, "F/n close your eyes." 

I didn't think anything of it so I did, "Okay my eyes are closed what is it you're trying t-"

But before I could finsih asking him, I felt his lips on mine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!
> 
> Levi's done kissed reader whatever will happen now?
> 
> xoxo


	9. Chapter 9

You Pov

Levi's lips were soft. The kiss was soft. 

And it was quick.

I bearly had time to register it. One second his lips were on me the next they weren't. 

I opened my eyes and saw Levi staring down at me. I didn't know what to do, but I knew I wanted to feel his lips again, so I moved to kiss him. This time the kiss was more urgent. Levi moved his hands to hold my face and held the fabric in his shirt. 

I was actually doing it. I was kissing Levi, and he was kissing me. He was actually kissing me! What was this? I was so happy; this was so right. Everything was perfect; this was everything I wanted...Wait, this was everything I wanted? Hold on...I was kissing Levi...My best friend. 

I pushed him away and started to catch my breath. I was looking everywhere but him; trying to understand really realizing the situation, "You kissed me." Or did he? This whole thing was so surreal, What if I just imagined it? "Did you kiss me?" I asked finally looking at him 

Levi looked back at me like he had his own war going on in his head, Omg he did kiss me! "Why-what? You have a girlfriend." I said pointing at him. "And I have a boyfriend." 

"F/n," He started, but I shook my head at him "Why would you do that? What were you thinking?" I couldn't ask enough question fast enough. Why would he do that? 

"You said you wouldn't get mad," Levi said looking away.

"Only if you didn't do anything that would make me mad!" I yelled at him.

Levi turned away from me, "I only tried it to see-" 

"To see what?" 

"It was nothing just a stupid thought, sorry," he said walking out of his room. 

I just watched him leave

What the actual fuck was that! And he thought he could walk away I walked after him, "Levi Ackerman, you had better explain what that was!" 

Levi stopped in his hallway and turned back to me, "I said it was nothing. I'll be back." Then he walked down his stairs and soon after I heard the front door close.

What the hell just happened?

Levi Pov

What the hell was I thinking? 

Why did I just kiss her?

I mean I knew why, because I wanted too. I heard her talking to Mikasa in the kitchen, and I don't know how but I thought for a second I had a chance. Fuck, I can't believe I just thought I had a chance with her, what the hell is wrong with me. She freaked out; I knew she would do that. 

But...she did kiss me back, hell, she actually pulled me back to kiss her.

What was that?

I kissed F/n, and she kissed me back and for a second everything was perfect, and just like that, it went to shit. 

I shook my head, As soon as I really realized what I did, I left. I know it was a shit move, but I didn't know what else to say to her. How do I explain how I really felt, when she just freaked out like that? Shit! I hit the steering wheel. How did I just let myself fuck up that bad? F/n didn't want to be more than friends; I know that cause she brought up Erwin. I should just accept that it's not in the cards for us. We're not meant to be more than friends. I need to be happy with the way things are between us now. Plain and simple.

I don't even know where I was driving out now. I was wasting gas. I need to go back, I need to just tell her it was a mistake and I wasn't thinking. Fucking hell, how do I fix this? Maybe I can tell her I was just joking?... Fuck, this was a mess. Maybe if I don't mention it, she won't. It would like the first time we kissed. Neither one of us talks about it. We just pretend it didn't happen. 

As if that would work. 

I fucked up real bad this time.

Your PovLevi had been gone for about two hours now. 

I just sat in his room laying on his bed. The only reason why I didn't leave is that I still don't want to go home with my mom and dad together. But that didn't mean I was okay.

I was so fucking far from okay right now.

Why would he do that? Like I don't know what he was thinking, And for him leaving here like that and not explaining anything? Who does that? Did he kiss me because he liked me? Why did he leave? There was so much going in my head. And why the hell did I kiss him back? What was wrong with me? I needed answers, and I wasn't finding any. I think I'm going to drive myself crazy.

So all I could do was lay here. 

I couldn't even sleep. Where is he? Where did he go? Why would he leave after doing that? What does this mean? What will happen to us? Did he regret it? Was he going to tell Petra? Should I tell Erwin? 

What the fuck am I supposed to do now? 

Just then I heard his bedroom door open. 

Shit. He's back! Shit, what am I supposed to say now? Maybe I should act like it wasn't a big deal? Maybe I imagined the whole thing? Maybe I was overreacting? God, I don't know what to do right now. 

"F/n?" 

I heard Levi call out my name, but I didn't respond. Maybe he would think I was sleep? Maybe I can get away with this whole awkward situation by pretending I don't remember it? 

"F/n, I know you're up," Levi said.

Well, there goes that idea.

"Look F/n, I'm sorry I did that. I was thinking about what Mikasa said about us dating...I was just seeing-" 

"What it would be like if we were more then friends?" I said finishing the rest of his sentence off for him and sitting up to face him. 

Levi didn't look at me, "Yeah." 

I guess that makes sense. I mean it has too. I can't think of any other reason why he would do that. I guess. It makes me feel better. If I'm honest with myself, I know it doesn't sound right, but I don't want to keep talking about it. It was so much there has to be a deeper answer, but I'm not sure If I can handle it. I should just act like it's nothing...Because it was nothing. 

"Okay...Just don't do that again okay?" I asked him.

"F/n-" 

"It's just you're my best friend Levi," I cut him off. "You've always have been, and I want you to stay that way. It would be weird if it were anything thing else right?" 

Levi just nodded looking away from me he went to sit down on his bed facing away from me, "Right." 

I moved so that our backs were leaning against each other, We both didn't say anything for a moment. I mean there was a lot to think about at least for me. I'm glad he's not addressing the fact that I pulled him back for that kiss, cause I won't bring it up for sure. Like how am I supposed to explain why I did that without telling him it was because I'm really in love with him?

"And anyway, You're a bad kisser." I tried to joke. I wanted to loosen this tension that was in the room.

"Tch, liar," He said.

"Ha, I bet that's the real reason Petra left she was tired of your shity kisses..." 

Levi got up, making me fall backward on his bed. I looked up and saw him looking down at me. "You're the one who doesn't know how to kiss. Your tongue was all over the place." 

"Jerk." I pouted.

"Liar." He responded. 

We both seemed to start to have an unseen argument. Then Levi looked away from me, "I'm taking a shower. I'll be back." Then Levi left his room.

I guess this means we're okay then. I mean we were just joking around just now...At least I hope. Honestly, this is just a mess, and I feel like it's just getting bigger. These feelings I have for Levi are just not going away...And I know they're wrong. There only going to tare is apart. I can't- I won't ruin what we have because of my own stupid feelings. I need Levi in my life- and I'd like to think he needs me too, and if I fucked it all up, I wouldn't be able to live with myself.

I have to keep how I feel to myself, no matter what. It's what's for the best. 

I shook my head to myself. I need to get my resolve together. I have to push these feelings away. I am his friend. His friend only, nothing more. I'll go back to how I was before all this complicated stuff started. I just need to be here to support him, that's what best friend are for. 

I have to do this if I want to keep him in my life. There's no other choice.

Levi Pov

I looked at the space F/n had been sleeping in. 

She went back home a few minutes ago. It was still about an hour before I should get up and get ready for school. No doubt she left to get a run in. 

I don't know what I was thinking. I should have told her the truth. How I really feel. This was becoming stupid. Why was a such a coward when it came to this? I could tell her anything else, but when it comes to telling her the truth about how I feel I just can't get it out? It was idiotic. 

I have to tell her. I know that much. But how now? I fucked it up by kissing her. She freaked out, but what makes it so confusing is she kissed me back. What was that? She didn't even mention it though. What am I supposed to with that? I know it has to mean she feels something for me. She fucking pulled me back. It means something...Maybe she didn't say anything because she's afraid? Or worst because she really likes Erwin or some stupid shit like that? 

Fuck. 

This is it. I'm going to tell her. 

I just need to fucking do it. Next time I see her and who cares what happens once I do.

What am I saying, I care. I'm not trying to push her away. I shouldn't have kissed her. I have to just take it slow. I'll break up with Petra. I'll go back to just hanging out with F/n, and I'll tell her the truth. Cause these feelings aren't going away if they were, I wouldn't think of her all the time. I wouldn't want her the way I do' so it's time I do something about them. I rather go living knowing I tried and lost her, then never trying and losing her.

I sighed, at least I know I have a 50/50 chance. She did kiss me back. I couldn't help but smile to myself. There was a chance. 

~~later~~

You Pov

I got back to my house after my morning run. 

I had a lot to think about, but for the most part, I'm keeping my resolve about Levi. I want him to stay in my life, so that means I can't have these feelings for him anymore, I'd just make it messier. I'm just going back to the way we used to be. Just friends, who joke around I'll be happy and supportive of his relationship with Petra. She's a nice girl, after all, I have no reason to be angry. I'll rather just be his friend then to risk. 

I walked into the kitchen to get something to drink, when I got in there, I saw my mom making her coffee. At least my dad wasn't here anymore.

"Good morning," I told her.

"Morning, You didn't come home last night, were you with Levi?" She asked me.

I nodded, I really didn't want to talk to her, I was still pretty angry about yesterday.

"Your dad was here," She told me. 

"Yeah, I had noticed." I snapped at her. 

My mom knew how I felt about them being together. Yesterday wasn't the first time they decided to mess around. And I've told her before how I felt about it. I guess she just didn't care.

"You know it's complicated F/n." My mom said in a quiet voice.

I sighed, "It can't be that hard. All you have to do is stay away from each other, find someone else. There a million things you could do." 

"It's easier said than done F/n." 

"Do you want to get hurt again?" I snapped at her, "Because this is how it starts. You've done it before mom! You two think you can make it work. Then you come home with a black eye. It's always something!" 

My mom didn't say anything, and neither did I. It was so frustrating. I only got this angry about this because I care. I love both of them, but I just know if they keep this up nothing good will come out of it. 

"I'm sorry F/n," She said.

I just nodded at her. I had to get ready for school, so I went ahead and left. 

Just then My phone buzzed, I looked and saw it was Erwin.

-Picking you up this morning?

I went ahead and answered him, yes. I need to remember to give Levi some space since he's still in his relationship, and we hung out all day yesterday, so today I should just lay off a bit. Not to mention I need to focus more on my own relationship. Erwin at his core is a good guy, I'm sure off it, and we've had a few rocky moments, but all in all, he's a good guy. Even with all that stuff that happened at the party; I honestly don't think he meant anything bad. If anything I've been the wrong one, I've been in love with someone else while I'm dating him. I sighed, but no more. He would now have all my attention. Wither Levi likes him or not. Erwin is my boyfriend, not Levi.

My phone buzzed again I looked this time it was Levi. Speak of the devil. 

-Riding with me, or are you driving?

I sighed.

-Erwin is picking me up. I'll see you later.

Then I put my phone back down to finish getting ready. 

-Then I'll meet you at your locker

I looked back at my phone again; it was Levi again. I sighed again. Why is he like this. Why is he messaging me? Why does my heart have to do a little flip whenever he does anything? I shook my head no. No, no. I will not do this. I am over him. I will have a beautiful day and spend most of my time with my boyfriend.

~~

It didn't take Erwin long to get to my house. I'm not sure how far he lives from my house, but he seems to get here on time most days when he picks me up. 

I got in his car smiling at him, "Hey," 

"Morning. Sleep well?" 

I nodded, "Ugh, yeah I did." I didn't have to mention I slept next to Levi in his room.

"You?" 

"Just about the same." He answered. 

We both went into a pretty comfortable silence. I just watched the houses and trees pass as Erwin drove. It was going to be a good day. The first day of me not thinking about Levi for most of it. Darn it. I thought about him again. I Wish I could do something to distract myself from him. But what?

Oh, that when it hit me. I turned to Erwin. "Hey," 

"Yeah?" He answered not looking at me.

"What do you think about us skipping today?" 

I saw him frown, "What like skipping school?" 

"Well, yeah."

Erwin looked at me for a second, "Seriously?" 

I smiled, "Yeah, wouldn't it be fun?" 

"Alright, who are you and what did you do with F/n?" He joked.

"What's that supposed to mean?" 

"Just you're not the type of girl to skip, that's all." 

I crossed my arms, "I can do delinquent things, Erwin." 

"Oh, really?" He teased. 

"Ugh, yeah really," I told him.

"What do you even want to do?" He asked me. Oh, that was a good question. Truth be told I've never really skipped before. I mean I have with Levi, but we'd just go back home and fall asleep or play video games or something. Nothing really fun so to speak.

"Ugh, We can go to the mall? Or to your house, I don't know. I'd say go to my house, but mom is still there." 

"Did you just say my house?" Erwin asked. 

Oh, God. I just realized what that was implying. "No. not to do anything like that," I said looking away from him.

Erwin just chuckled a bit. "How about we just go to the movies, we can hang out in the mall for a bit until they open then we go catch a movie then after we go to the school?" 

I nodded, "Sounds good." 

This was going to be fun.

Levi Pov

"Have you seen F/n?" I asked Furlan. "Or Even Erwin?

We were in 4th block, and I didn't have any more classes for the day. I hadn't seen her all day. She said she was getting a ride from that dick Erwin. But she wasn't here yet. And I haven't seen him here today either. I was getting worried.

"No, and no," Furlan answered me not looking up from his phone.

I looked back at my I had messaged F/n twice, but she hadn's answered back yet. "I think something is up with F/n," I told Furlan.

"I'm sure she's fine." 

"She's not here, and neither is Erwin."

"Maybe they skipped or something," Furlan said.

"This is F/n we're talking about she doesn't skip unless she's with me." 

Furlan looked up from his phone, "Remember she's with Erwin? Her boyfriend. I'm sure if she wants to skip with him she can do that." 

"Tch, they wouldn't even have anything to do," I told him.

Furlan snorted, "He's her boyfriend. I'm sure they can find something to do." 

I rolled my eyes, "Don't even joke like that." 

"What you don't think they haven't? It is Erwin we're talking about. I'm about 50% sure they've gotten it on at least once," He joked. Only I didn't find it funny.

"Would you just up." I snapped.

Furlan held his hand up in defense. "Why so snappy today Levi? You that worried about F/n?" 

"I'm going to tell her how I really feel about her," I told him. If I could tell anyone about how I felt about F/n, it was Furlan. He was the only other person that was close to me beside F/n. He was the brother I never had.

"What! It's about damn time!" Furlan yelled out.

"Shut up." 

"What brought this on?" He asked stopping me from walking by standing in front of me.

"I kissed her last night," I told him the truth. 

"You did what?" He yelled again.

Okay, now he was getting annoying. "Would you shut up." 

"But what about Petra? What are you going to do about her?" 

Why was he so dumb sometimes, "I'll break up with her tomorrow when she comes back." 

"Damn that's cold," Furlan said shaking his head.

"You go another recommendation?" 

Furlan shrugged, "Nah, but that's still messed up." 

"It's life." 

"When are you going to tell her?" He asked me.

"As soon as I see her. I've waited long enough." I told him.

"Ha, so you're finally admitting that you've liked her all this time?" Furlan asked seeming excited as we walking to the lunch room.

I rolled my eyes at him again, "Yes." But I couldn't help but feel a little better. It was nice to admit it.

"But what if F/n is happy already?" 

"What's that supposed to mean?" 

"I mean, what if F/n is happy with Erwin? Will you still tell her? Or what if she doesn't feel the same way then what? Did she kiss you back last night? How do you know you should do it?" 

"Are you with me or not?" I snapped at him, he was asking too many questions, and now it was annoying again.

"I am. I just both of you two be happy if you get me?" 

"Did you guys see F/n over there?" Bella said popping up out of nowhere, Where did you come from?" I snapped at her. Then I realized what she said, "F/n? Where?" 

Bella pointed across the room.

And sure enough, she was over there sitting on the table making out with Erwin.

Is this what Furlan meant, when he asked what if she's happy? I watched her move from him she was all smiles looking in his face. She seemed happy...unlike our kiss yesterday she pushed me away and panicked. She didn't do the same with Erwin, granted he is technically her boyfriend, so she doesn't have a reason to act like that, but still, now I'm thinking. What if she is happy now? Maybe I shouldn't? I'm supposed to be her friend. Doesn't that mean supporting her? Would telling her how I feel make her feel bad?

"Are you still going to talk to her?" Furlan asked, as though he was reading my mind.

But I didn't answer. 

I wasn't so sure anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!!
> 
> What will Levi do now?
> 
> I'll be honest I'm kinda eh about this and the next chapter, mostly cause its filler and it's needed filler but I do hope you all enjoyed reading it! 
> 
> Not 100% sure when the next chapter will come out If' I'm lucky I can finish it up before this week is over if not just expect it sometime next week. 
> 
> Again I hope you all like this chapter!! until the next one
> 
> xoxo


	10. Chapter 10

Your Pov

"How many time have you done it with Erwin?" 

I immediately choked on the juice I was drinking because of Levi's question. I tried to look at his expression, but it was too hard to see him between all the coughing I was doing and my eyes watering. Like seriously? What the hell? What type of question is that?

"You're so dramatic," I heard Levi say in a monotone voice.

Catching my breath I looked at him; he was staring at me from my bed waiting for an answer. I, on the other hand, was frowning, "You cannot ask me that type of question!"

"I told you, everyone, I slept with." 

"That is different." 

"Tch, no it isn't," He said still staring at me.

I couldn't help but laugh a little, "I'm not answering that Levi." 

"Why not? Have you guys done it that much?" He asked.

"No!" I snapped.

"Then you've haven't done it any." He stated. Levi tilted his head, "It's either one of the two, You guys have done it a lot or haven't done it at all." 

Feeling frustrated I sighed, "It's the latter, why do you care anyway? You don't hear me asking you how many times you've done it with Petra." 

Levi sighed, "We've done it a few times, like nine or ten times." 

"I didn't ask!" I yelled standing up and throwing my pillow I was laying on at him.

God, what was with Levi lately? He's been acting so weird like even for him. For like the past two weeks he's just been so strange. He's been popping up over my house more than normal. Like at one point it was normal, but since he and Petra got together he had pretty much stopped, but now he's over here more again. He'll say it's because he's helping me with homework or he just doesn't want to be home alone, or he needs help with his lines. Just really random stuff. He'll invite me to his rehearsals whenever I'm not with Erwin. Speaking of Erwin, he's always asking questions about him, why I like him? Or when and where are we hanging out next, and now this?

If I didn't any know better, and I do I would think Levi likes me.

But that couldn't be further from the truth. He has a girlfriend. One who I'm wondering where she is, but he does have one. And the other major fact, he's my best friend, and he's made it clear he just doesn't like me like that. So him liking me couldn't be the real case. If anything, maybe he was just trying out the whole older bother thing. I mean I can't put that passed him, he is the same guy who told all the other boys in the school to leave me alone. Not to mention he still doesn't like Erwin so that would explain all the questions about Erwin.

"What is your deal lately?" I asked him. I moved to sit on my bed next to him. Today his reason for being over here was he needed help with lines, I asked him where Petra was, and he simply told me he was going to meet her at the rehearsal. Maybe there is something up with their relationship, and he's acting this way? "Are you and Petra having relationship problems?" 

Levi clicked his tongue at me.

I snorted, maybe I was right? "Ha, do you need relationship advice? Or like tips from a girl on how to treat them?" 

Levi threw the pillow back at me, "Shut up, I was just curious." 

I laughed a little harder, "Well, your curiosity is creeping me out. You've been so weird lately Levi."

"You think?" 

"Yes, I wish you'd tell me what was up with you," I told him, picking up his script getting ready to practice with him again. 

"You want me to tell you what's been up with me?" Levi asked. 

"Ugh, duh." 

"F/n I-" 

"F/n I'm home!" My mother called out suddenly before Levi could say everything.

I sighed, "Hold that thought," Then I left out to go see her downstairs. 

Since it had been about two weeks since my dad was over I've pretty much calmed down from being mad at her. That is until he pops back over. God, they are so annoying. "Hey, mom," I said walking into the kitchen.

"Hey, sweets." 

"Hey, (Moms name)," Levi said walking in behind me. I didn't even see him follow me.

"Oh, Levi! It's nice to see you here." she beamed at him. "It's been so long since you've been over," 

"I've been busy," Levi told her.

"Oh? I was under the impression the two of you were having a lovers spat," My mom said.

"Wow," I said. I can't even believe her; I shook my head, "It's not even like that." 

"You don't have to convince me," my mom said just putting away the food.

"You do realize I have a boyfriend right mom? And it's not Levi." 

"A questionable one I might add." 

"What is questionable about Erwin?" I said half laughing half serious. 

"What isn't?" I heard Levi say under his breath. 

"Shut up," I snapped at him.

"See, Levi agrees. Now tell me, Levi, why'd you let some other boy come around and sweep F/n off her feet? You've had forever to get with her." She said with a smile.

"Mom it has never been like that okay? Levi and I are friends! We've been this way since birth! I don't know why all of you insist that we aren't. Tell her Levi," I told him.

Levi paused for a moment, "F/n has always been my friend." 

"See!" I said turning back to my mom.

I was trying to prove my point. I still don't know why everyone thinks we like each other. We both are in a relationship. And while yeah it is true that I do like Levi, I've been trying to stop. And for the most part, I'm doing okay. Again it's not me who wants to spend time with him. I mean I do, and I like that he's made more of an effort to hang out again, but I've been trying not to be there all the time one because it will help me to stop wanting to be with him so much and end up ruining our friendship and two because Petra asked me too. 

She had a point, and I don't want to be the annoying third wheel in there relationship because I'm his friend, I mean I don't see him trying to do that with Erwin. But I digress I'm just trying to play it cool. 

My mom looked at the both of us, "Anyway, what are you guys up to tonight?" 

"Well, Levi had his practice, I was just going to go to bed earlier after my homework," I answered her.

"Sleep really?" My mom said unimpressed. 

"Is that an issue?" I asked her.

"No, just sounds boring. Why don't you go with Levi? Do something with your life; you're only young once." 

"Um, no," I said shaking my head.

"I don't mind you coming along," Levi spoke up.

I looked at him, he may be, but I'm sure Petra would. "Nah, I'm chill." 

"It's more fun when you're there anyway," Levi added.

"It's not supposed to be fun, it's supposed to be a rehearsal," I told him.

"F/n stop being stubborn, go," My mom told me.

I rolled my eyes, "God, you guys are so annoying, Levi when are you heading out?" 

"In a few minutes." 

I sighed, "Fine. I'll change my clothes." Then I left for upstairs.

This is so frustrating. I honestly like going to his practices. I like being around Levi; I'm in love with him for fucks sakes! But I know this isn't helping me change the way I feel about him. Being around him just makes me love him more and more. And I'm trying to change that, I really am. Hell, I'm trying to change it for us! So it will never be a reason for us to be apart. Like what would happen if by some crazy chance we did get together, what if we broke up? Then what? He's making it so fucking hard. And let us not forget about Petra I'm really trying not to piss her off. But I can't outright and saw no to Levi. Right? I sighed to myself. If anything I'll tell her he insisted I go if she's there. I don't want her to think I want him, who knows what kind of trouble that would bring into anything. 

I shook my head, I just need to tell Levi to chill out. Maybe he really does need a talk on how to treat a girl? 

Who knows.

Levi Pov

"I know you like F/n," F/n's mom said to me once F/n was out of earshot.

I looked away from her, "You've said it yourself. I waited too long." 

(Moms name) smiled shaking her head, "It's never too late you know, I'm sure if you told F/n she would drop him." 

"I plan on telling her...one day." 

"Well, last I checked there isn't a day of the week called one day." 

I rolled my eyes at her. F/n mom was always like an aunt to me. It wasn't many adults I felt like I could be open with, but she was one of them. And I guess it's a plus that it's F/n mom. At least I know if we were to get married her mom would like me. "Tch. I haven't really found the right moment to tell her. Plus I do still have a girlfriend of my own. And it's not like it would be easy, Whos to even say F/n actually likes me back that much. Bottom line is I could still be ruining what we already have if I open my mouth." 

"And? That's life if you guys work out great if not then move on." She told me like it was obvious, "You're overthinking it too much, I'm sure you both are. But you're a smart kid Levi you've always been so I'm sure you'll figure it out." 

"Figure what out?" We both looked and saw F/n walk back in the room.

He mom sighed, "What you two are going to do when you get back from his practices, Kuchel and I are going out tonight. So most likely we won't be home when you get back. So I'm sure you know how to feed yourselves?" 

"Yeah, yeah." F/n started to say walking towards the door, "I'll make sure I'll throw the biggest party the block as ever seen and burn down the house when I'm done. Levi you ready?" 

"Nice save, see ya," I said looking at (mom's name) as I left out to follow F/n. 

F/n's mom just chuckled, "I'll see you two later. Love you F/n." 

"love you too, mom! stay safe!" F/n called out. Then we left out the house closing the door.

"I thought you were still mad at her," I asked F/n.

She shrugged, "Not really, I mean just a little. It's just nothing I can do about it, so I'll be fine at least until he comes over again." 

I didn't say anything else while we got in my car. For the most part, F/n was quite. Maybe this was a good time to bring it up? "F/n look I've-" 

"Is Petra going to really to be okay with me being there tonight?" F/n asked cutting me off. This was the second time she did this; it was like the universe telling me it was a bad Idea to tell her how I felt. "Like I'm really trying to not get on her bad side. Plus I'm not trying to be your third wheel." 

"It's fine. You're overthinking it." 

I felt her look at me, "You sure?" 

"Yeah, Petra likes hanging out with you," I told her. That wasn't a lie, but it wasn't the truth either. In all honesty, I didn't know how Petra felt. And I really didn't care. I know I'm being kinda shitty to her, but I don't care, If anything she's my backup, and I know that's wrong, but It's nice to know I'd have someone to go back to if telling F/n the truth doesn't work out. And I don't think she has an issue with F/n, and if she did, she's never mentioned it to me. Besides Petra knows F/n and I are close, it's not like we've just started being that way just now so it's not like I would just drop her.

Petra is cool 

She shouldn't have an issue with it.

Later

"Why is she here Levi?" Petra asked me after pulling me to the back of the stage. 

I looked over to the seats F/n was just sitting there talking to some of the cast. I looked back at Petra, "She didn't have anything to do so I invited her here with us." 

"She's not even in the play," Petra stated.

"The director doesn't mind her here." 

"What is your deal with her lately? She's been everywhere with you don't you think that's a bit weird?" She asked me.

I shrugged, "No, This has always been the way we are." 

Petra just looked at me like she didn't care, "So? Anyway, you're in a relationship with me now. Shouldn't there be some boundaries? Like not popping up at our rehearsals, Twice in one week." 

"You're making a big deal of this. Why?" I asked her. "And I invited her; it's not like she came here on her own." 

"Why?" Petra smiled getting frustrated, "Becuase you're in a relationship with me and not her. I don't like feeling like I have to compete with her for your attention Levi." 

She had a point. I know I haven't been the best and the only things that have really been on my mind have been this play and F/n. I was being a dick. I haven't actually taken the time to think about how she felt. I'm basically stinging her along. And it's not right. I shook my head, but I do still have that 50% chance that F/n really doesn't like me the way I like her, and that's the only reason why I haven't broken up with her. I don't really care about how much of an asshole I come across, but I'm not going to see F/n in a relationship with Erwin and not have anyone. 

"Look I'm sorry, I didn't think how it would make you feel." I told her, "I know F/n, and I are close, but you shouldn't have to feel like it's a competition with her." Because F/n would always win. At least that's what I thought.

Petra gave me a genuine smile this time then moved to hug me, "Thank you. I knew you could be sweet whenever you wanted to be." 

I didn't respond to her.

I think I was making this more complicated. The sooner I tell F/n the better. 

Your Pov

This musical was going to be so much fun to watch, and Levi was going to just shine. I smiled to myself; I'm so proud of him. Watching him perform I can see just go much he's really putting into this show. But then again Levi does this with everything he just isn't the type of guy to half-ass things. I bet this will open a lot of doors for him. 

"Enjoying the view?" 

I jumped from the voice behind me. It was Petra.

Oh, God, did she see me staring at Levi? Well, you can't really call it staring because he is up there acting, so there's that. I shook my head, "Oh, hey! what was that?" I asked her playing dumb.

Petra just smiled and sat down beside me, "Nothing, I don't go on stage for a minute, so I decided to watch from right here." 

"Nice, Ugh, you can keep me company," I said awkwardly.

We both sat there in a heavy silence. 

God, this was weird. Levi said she didn't have an issue with me, but I don't know, I feel like it's something she wants to say to me. If I were her I know, I would. Levi's been acting weird. Hmm, maybe they really were having problems, and she needed advice? But that would so suck. I don't want to give the guy I like girlfriend's advice to have a better relationship with him. Or maybe it is really simple, and she wants to tell me to stop hanging out with Levi again.

"Look F/n-"

"Petra-" 

We both spoke at the same time. 

She nodded her head at me, "You go first." 

"It was Levi's idea for me to come here today. I know you asked me before to chill out hanging out with him, so I was just going to say sorry," I told her.

Petra didn't say anything for a minute then she sighed, "It's fine. I get it. The two of you are close I mean I guess I knew that coming in, it doesn't make it frustrating though. I just talked to him. I told him how I don't like feeling like I have to compete with you like I know he likes you and-" 

"What? Seriously Petra you don't have to compete with me, and Levi doesn't like me." I started to tell her, "Levi is hard to read sometime, but I know Levi doesn't do anything he doesn't want to. So if he decided to date you, it's because he likes you!" Why am I telling her this? I should be happy if their relationship falls apart right? I shook my head, "Trust me okay?" 

I guess at the end of the day I'm telling her all this for him. Since I know he does like her I should help out where I can, I mean what if he really does like her a lot but just really sucks at this relationship thing? As his friend, I can't let him screw this up. 

"You can say what you want, but everyone knows he likes you, and I'm sure some part of you really likes him too," Petra told me. "It's fine though." 

I tried to muster up a laughed, "I don't though," I paused for a moment. This was a strange conversation to have with her, "I don't like Levi...He's my best friend. I would risk ruining that if we were anything more." 

"Keep telling yourself that, I'm not the one who's in denial. But then again maybe you're right you do know him better than me." Petra said getting up, "Anyway I have to get ready for my scene I'll talk to you later." 

I just watched Petra get up and walk away.

I don't like Levi. 

I mean I do like Levi

It's just I shouldn't like Levi, so I won't like him. 

I need to turn these feeling off. Nothing good would come out of this. I shouldn't be with him, so I shouldn't be here. He has a girlfriend, and it's wrong that she feels like she has to compete with me for him. I knew coming here wasn't a good idea.

I should leave. 

Levi Pov

The rehearsal was done for the night, and I was tried. 

I was ready to go home and go to sleep, but I know I still have some homework I need to get done. 

I went out looking for F/n with Petra only to see her at the door with Erwin. Why the fuck was he here? "What's up?" I asked trying to be as calm as possible

F/n turned around like she was surprised to see me, "Oh, Levi?" She gave me this half-assed smile. 

"What are you doing here Smith?" 

He smiled at me, "I ask just picking up F/n," 

"Erwin was done working and wanted to hang out," F/n added. 

"I thought you were going home?" I asked her, what was she up too now?

"Yeah, but I decided I didn't want to go home, Erwin said he had something fun for us to do," She told me, I could hear she was getting annoyed.

"That sounds nice, Levi we should do something fun," Petra said. 

I forgot she was right here, "Tch, I'm tired." 

"You are always sleepy Levi, you should do something fun." F/n said.

This was frustrating. Everything was frustrating. I sighed, "Fine. How about we hang with you guys." 

"What?" 

"What?" 

Petra and F/n both said.

I shrugged, "The two of you always seem to be having fun somewhere. Why don't Petra and I join you." 

"I don't know about tonight," Erwin started to say.

"Why not?" I asked.

"It's fine." F/n said.

Erwin looked at her.

F/n shrugged, "I'm not sure if you guys want to come through, Erwin and I were going for a swim." 

"A swim?" Petra asked.

"Yeah, there's this really nice outdoor pool not that far from here, it's been so hot lately we were going to go sneak in for a dip. RIght Erwin?" She asked looking at him.

Erwin nodded like he was agreeing with her. 

I bet she made that up on the spot. F/n would never do anything like that, how stupid does she think I am? "Fine I'm in, you Petra?" I asked looking at her.

"Ugh, umm sure," Petra said.

I didn't like F/n trying to up and leave without telling me, and then lying about where they were going, "It sounds like fun. I know the pool you're talking about let's go." I said walking past them all to my car.

I'll show her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading!!
> 
> fun stuff planned for the next chapter.
> 
> xoxo


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So if you like this story and you like music I've made a playlist for it. Basically, It's a soundtrack. I'm constantly adding songs to it that fit the story wither they be for past or future chapters. So that's fun, right? And if you have a song you think I should add just drop it in the comments or you can inbox or message me on my SNK Tumblr page!!
> 
> Heres a like to the playlist!!
> 
> https://open.spotify.com/user/1258003038/playlist/2kBd98ZbURnhuH4T68ukRt

Your Pov

Well, that backed fired. 

I didn't actually want to go to this pool. I had just made it up; I thought he'd say no! What we were about to do was illegal! I looked at Erwin who was driving, "Er, sorry. I didn't think he'd insist like that." 

"It's fine," Erwin said not looking at me.

The ride was awkward. I bet he's mad. And this isn't even a good Idea, me Erwin, Petra and Levi in a place together? Alone? It was just a disaster waiting to happen. "Maybe this is a bad idea? I can just tell Levi we changed our mind," I told him.

"Nah, it's fine. It sounds like it would be fun," He insisted.

It really doesn't. 

I sighed, "Fine, just-I know you and Levi don't have the best track record, so just be nice okay?" 

Erwin glanced at me, "F/n it's fine. I won't start anything with him." 

"And If he starts something with you?" I asked him.

Erwin chuckled, "I'll ignore him. It will be fun. We're going out just to have fun F/n." I leaned back in my chair. He sounds like he's sure, but I'm still a little doubtful. I sighed again, "Okay." 

It didn't take us too long to get there. Levi and Petra were already standing out by the door when Erwin and I walked up. "For the record, I think this is just a bad idea," Petra said. She was right. This was a bad idea I just knew it. I couldn't shake the bad feeling I was having.

"You know what Petra? You might be right," I started to say. At this point, I really don't think we should be doing this. Maybe I can convince them still, "I don't know what I was thinking w-" 

"Nonsense, It will alright, Right Levi?" Erwin said cutting me off and looking at Levi.

"Yeah, loads," Levi said. Levi then started to clam the fence that was guarding the pool.

Oh god, we were actually going to do this. 

Erwin moved to climb over next. I looked at Petra, and she looked back at me. 

"I guess we're doing this..." I said. 

Petra looked about as excited as I did, which wasn't much, "I guess we are." Then we both went to start climbing.

I just hope this won't turn into a mess. 

If Levi and Erwin can stay chill with each other, it will be alright. God, I hope they don't act like idiots. 

By the time Petra and I got over, I saw Levi was already in the water. What was he trying to prove? I know at this point he had to know I didn't actually want to do this anymore, but he still insisted. And the same with Erwin, if I didn't know any better I would think they're trying to see which one of them would back out first, but their both too damn stubborn to back off. Didn't they realize how much trouble we would get in if we got caught? We all could go to jail! This was a gated community's pool! I sighed to myself. I can only pray that this works alright.

 

Levi Pov

F/n looked nervous.

I had expected that much. After all, I knew she was lying when she said they were coming out here. I just can't believe she thought she could ditch me like that. And With Erwin? F/n could be such an idiot. 

Like now. 

Hell, I didn't even think she would keep this going this long. Well, I take that back. I can tell she didn't want to do this. She was saying she didn't want to do it anymore. No this wasn't F/n anymore this was him. Erwin. The only reason I was still going through with this was that Erwin was trying to challenge me I just know it. And there is no way I was going to let him punk me like that. 

So here we are. 

I was already in the water, Erwin was taking his clothes off. I looked at Petra and F/n. "You guys scared?" I teased them. It was wrong and I know we shouldn't be here and if we get caught we'll be in a shit load of trouble, but still, it was still fun.

"I'm not scared," F/n spoke up.

"Then get in," I told her. 

"I guess we are here now," Petra said pulling her shirt off and the rest of her clothes, "We might as well have fun." Then she jumped into the water. 

F/n stared at us, "I'll just put my feet in the water." She said taking her shoes off.

"Oh, come on I did it, you can too!" Petra said wiping the water from her face.

F/n laughed, "I know but I just remembered I did my hair today, and It would be a sham-" But before she could finish Erwin walked behind her and pushed her in. 

What was wrong with him? I started to swim over to her, but F/n swam up, "What the fuck Erwin!" She yelled at him.

Erwin was in the water by now and the asshole was laughing, "You just kept making excuses." 

"I have all my clothes on still you jerk!" F/n said. 

"Yeah, but you look all cute all wet like that," Erwin told her.

"I-Well...I. You're an ass." F/n said stuttering. 

"But you like it," Erwin teased her.

This was disgusting. 

"Well, aren't they cute?" Petra said swimming next to me.

I looked back at her. If F/n can act all cute with that asshole I can do the same thing. I pulled Petra closer to me and kissed her, "they're gross." 

Petra looked a little surprised, but she went along with it. "Yeah, I like that we don't do all that mushy stuff," She said smiling and then kissing me again. I am here with Petra after all and I did tell her I would try being better at not giving F/n all my attention. So it was right that I was making out with her right now. If anything It makes work better. In the case F/n does like me, this will just make her a little jealous and that just might make her see how she really feels about me.

"Woah, calm down there are children here," Erwin spoke up swimming towards us.

"Tch, what do you want?" I snapped at him. I looked past him to see F/n getting back into the water, I guess he had gotten out to take off her clothes. He was such an ass to push her in like that. God, I'll never know why she thought dating him was a good idea. 

"Levi," Petra said in a warning tone. 

I rolled my eyes. I guess how much I hate Erwin is a known thing, so when Petra and I were waiting on them before we got in she was trying to tell me not to start anything with him while we were here. 

I groan. I couldn't think of anything to nice to say to him, so I didn't say anything. 

"Why don't we play a game, you guys?" Petra asked as F/n swam up to the rest of us. 

"A game?" She asked. 

Petra shrugged. "I dunno, it's a pool were in the water. All things considered, this actually pretty fun." 

"I guess breaking the rules are a bit fun, what should we play?" F/n asked. She looked at all of us. 

"How about some truth or dare?" Petra suggested.

"How about no," F/n said laughing, "Um...never have I?" 

"Nah, that one isn't fun either," Petra said.

"Here," Erwin called out. We all looked at him he had found a ball. "We can just play a little volleyball until you guys come up with something." 

"That's a dumb Idea," I spoke up. 

"Levi," F/n said this time in that same stupid warning tone that Petra already said it in earlier. 

"Tch, we're not supposed to be in here anyway, why would we play something that's loud as fuck?" I told them. Erwin was stupid for suggesting it.

"Oh, he has a point." F/n agreed. 

"So truth or dare?" Petra asked. 

"I guess so," F/n said. 

Erwin swam back to where we were at, "Sounds like fun," 

"Fine," I added. 

Okay, "Who's first?" 

"I'll go first," F/n said shrugging, "Um dare!" 

"Okay, uh, put your head underwater for a minute," Petra said. She shook her head, "I'm sorry, I'm bad at the dare part." 

F/n laughed, "It's fine, I'm sure I'm bad at ever part of the game." Then she went under, she was only about ten seconds. Rising back up she shook her hair, "Okay who's next?" 

"I'll go," Erwin spoke up, "I'll do dare but do something fun guys," 

"Okay I got a fun one," Petra spoke up, "Give F/n a hickie," 

"What no!" F/n laughed saying. 

I tensed up. What was Petra playing at now? 

"Come on it will be fun," Erwin said pulling F/n towards him. I watched her giggle as he moved his face right above her collarbone. F/n bite her lip while he sucked on her, she looked like she was enjoying it. I looked away, I didn't want to see that. 

"I'll go next." I told them making Erwin stop, "Truth." 

"Okay," Erwin said moving away from F/n. "How many girls have you slept with." 

"One, Petra." What was Erwin trying to get at? It was like he was trying to piss me off. 

"I thought you said Hanji too?" F/n added. 

"I've told you this before, Hanji is nonbinary," I answered her.

"Wait you did it to hanji?" Erwin asked. 

"Yeah? So?" 

"Nothing just didn't realize they were your type," Erwin said with a laugh in his voice.

"Well, how many girls have you slept with? Hmm?" I asked him.

"Not my turn anymore," Erwin said putting his hands up in defense.

"Yeah, it's my go, ugh I'll to dare," Petra said. 

"Hmm, dare let's see..." F/n said floating around trying to figure out a dare for her.

"Kiss F/n," Erwin spoke up. 

God, this game was a bad idea. 

"No way!" F/n said.

Petra shook her head and agreed, "I am not about to kiss F/n." 

Erwin laughed, "I was only joking," 

"You're not that funny," I told him. 

Erwin rolled his eyes, "Fine. Give Levi a hickie," 

"So original," Petra said rolling her eyes. She moved over to me, "Well this is fun. You're the one who always gives me the hickies." 

"TMI," F/n said in a monotone voice. 

I wonder if she was jealous. If she was this whole game might be a perfect chance to really drive her crazy. So I played the part. It was an awkward position to be in but I had to act like I liked it. While I felt Petra sucking on my skin I move one of my hands in her hair pulling her to me like I was really enjoying it. I opened my eyes for a moment and saw F/n looking straight at me, but then she quickly looked away with this expression I wasn't used to seeing her make. 

Petra moves away and sure enough, I had a red mark on me. How annoying.

"Red looks good on you," Petra said with a smile. 

I didn't respond. I was too busy wondering what was going on in F/n's head. 

Your Pov

I didn't like this game so much anymore. 

We've been playing for a few minutes now, we've done a like three rounds and two of them involved Petra and Levi making out in front of me. I know I shouldn't be affected by it. It's not like Levi is getting upset because Erwin and I made out. It's all my own issue. I need to just stop feeling this way about him. I should be happy for him. Hell, I even actually like Petra a bit. She has her moment, but for the most part, she's pretty cool. I know at this point she just wants to have fun. It doesn't help that this whole thing has been so awkward, and I know Petra feels it. It's mostly because of Levi and Erwin. It's like they keep challenging each other. It's so annoying. 

Right now it was Levi's turn again, and he picked truth. And we were supposed to be coming up with a funny thing to ask him.

"How do you really feel about F/n?" Erwin asked out of nowhere.

I frowned, What type of question is that? "Ugh, what? We're friends. You guys all know that." I answered for him.

"I asked Levi," 

"He asked Levi," 

Erwin and Petra spoke up. 

"What's this about?" 

"I just want to know what Levi has to say," Petra asked looking at Levi. 

Levi looked at all of us. He had the on that face he makes when he's about to say something blunt. 

"I-"

"Who's in there!" 

Right before he could answer we all heard a voice yelling. 

"Fuck," 

I'm pretty sure that was all of our response. We all move as fast as we could to get out. Trying to get hurry up and get out clothes. Thanks to the Erwin all my things were still wet. And we weren't even here long enough for them to dry. So I was running with wet clothes in my hands. 

"Shit, shit, shit," Petra yelled out, in all honesty, it was stressful but it was still pretty funny. At least to me and Petra since we were laughing as we ran. Petra got over the fence first. Then Levi, But he didn't just take off.

"Come on F/n," He told me, rushing me as I climbed the fence.

I felt Erwin behind be helping me, "Hurry the officer is getting closer!" 

God, this was crazy. 

Once we were all over we ran to our cars. I did notice Petra had already left. Ha, she really didn't want to get in trouble. 

"Come on F/n," Levi called out to me to get in his car. 

"Let's go F/n," Erwin called after me too.

Wait, who was I supposed to go with? 

I looked back and forth between them. 

"I'll see you at home Levi," I called after him and ran to get into Erwin's car. Once I got in he took off. 

I sighed, leaning back in the seat. Woah, that was a lot just now. 

I looked in the mirror to see If Levi was driving away yet, but instead, I saw him standing there in the parking lot still.

Was he angry I didn't leave with him? I shook the thought of my head, no. That wasn't it. Why would he be angry? I'm supposed to be giving him space. If anything I could say I thought he was going to go to Petra's house afterward. I shook my head again. The point is I know he needs to spend more time with her anyway and not me. I should be with my own boyfriend. At the end of the day, I have to remember I am doing this for us. 

I sighed, all in all, tonight was fun. 

Petra's honestly pretty cool. I can see how she can be a good match with Levi, they're cute together...

I should be happy. 

Anyway, I had fun and I'll end the night hanging out with Erwin as I should. 

Everything was going to be alright.

~~Later~~

Levi Pov

I don't think I've ever been so angry at F/n until this moment.

She picked that asshole. 

Why would she do that? What was so fucking great about him? 

I just can't figure out. I know she has feelings for me, even if just a little bit she had them, but for the life of me I can't figure out why she would still choose him. It wasn't even like he was a good person. Erwin was a fucking creep. A dumb fucking jock. All he's going to do is hurt her. I don't understand how she can be such a dumbass about this. I told her he was, I would think that would be enough, but no. She still wants to date him. He almost raped her for fuck sake. 

I took a deep breath. 

I need to chill out. 

I've been so pissed off about that night I didn't talk to her when she finally came home at 3 in the morning on a school night I might add. She was being stupid. I don't know how to talk to her when she's acting like this. 

I thought maybe being hugged up with Petra would make her think about her feelings but they didn't. Or maybe they backfired. I don't know and right now I don't even give a shit. 

"No F/n this morning?" Bella asked walking up to me by my locked. 

"Tch, do you see F/n?" I snapped at her. 

"I thought the two of you were talking again. Furlan even says you were going to tell her how you really felt," Bella said. 

Did he tell her? 

Just on cue, Furlan walked up, "You told Bella?" 

"Was I not supposed to do that?" He asked.

I groaned, Idiots, I'm surrounded by idiots. 

"Just keep your fucking mouths shut about it," I told him. 

"Why haven't you told her? You said you didn't care she had a boyfriend last time we talked," Furlan asked leaning on the locker.

"I've tried. Believe me, I've tried. But something fucks it up every time." It was true. Every time I get ready to tell her something happens. At this point, it getting more and more annoying, and right now I didn't even feel like telling her cause she pissed me off so bad last night.

"Let go of me, Mikasa!" 

Furlan, Bella and I looked over to see Mikasa walking down the hall holding Eren by the ear. He was such a punk. How could he let her handle him like that?

"Such a happy couple." Bella joked when they got close enough to us. 

"Tell Levi what you heard." She told him pushing.

"What? Why do I have to-"

"I said tell Levi what you just told me," Mikasa told him giving him a death glare.

"This had better be good," I told them. By now other people had started looking at us. 

Eren looked at me, "It was honestly nothing."

"Eren," Mikasa said again.

I rolled my eyes, "I don't have time for this." 

"I heard Erwin talking to his friends about how he nailed F/n," Eren finally said.

I snapped my head back at him, "What?" 

"Yeah," Eren answered looking away from me.

"Did he say anything else?" 

"No." 

Mikasa hit him on his side, Eren sighed, "I don't want to be the one to make Levi go revenge crazy." 

"What else did he say, Jaeger!" I yelled. 

"Fine," He said, "Only that he nailed her and she was this crazy sex freak. He's basically spreading rumors about her to his friends. He was only telling the guys on the football team I only heard cause I was getting some stuff I left in my locker-" 

I didn't hear the rest of that He was saying because I was already heading down to find the bastard.

I knew nothing good was going to come out of her dating him. I know F/n didn't have sex with him. She just wouldn't. Not with that jerk, not after what he had tried to do to her. I shook my head, and even if she did. He shouldn't be telling anyone about it. Maybe F/n sound like some time of slut. 

I've had enough. 

I didn't take long to find him by his locker. Lucky F/n wasn't even around him. Where was she? I shook my head I didn't care, I had one mission on my mind. 

"Erwin!" I called out making him look at me.

And before he could say anything I aimed a punch right for his eye. 

Your Pov

So apparently Levi and Erwin got in a fight today.

I don't know any of the details because I wasn't at school today because I a doctor appointment. But I got a text from Bella and Ymir saying that it was a fight and Levi thew the first punch. 

What was wrong with him? 

I shook my head, well at least this is like his first fight since middle school, so hopefully, it won't be too bad for him. But still, can't he get along with Erwin even just for me? I mean you don't see me trying to fight Petra. I wonder what she has to say about this? I don't have her number so I guess I'll have to ask her tomorrow. 

When my mom and I pulled up to our house I saw Levi's car was there. 

I guess I'll go talk to him.

"I'm going to go see Levi, okay mom," I told her walking to his house.

Once I was in I called out to see if Mikasa or Kuchel was there but I didn't get a response. So I guess Levi is here along. I went ahead and made my way to his room. Only to open and see him in his chair at his desk idly moving. I guess he had a lot to think about. 

"Hey," I said softly. 

Wait? Why am I being soft with him? He's the one who started it from what I heard. I put my hands on my hip, "And why did you punch and then get into a fight with my boyfriend today?" 

"Tch," Levi only clicked his tongue and turned to face away from me. 

"Excuse me?" I said moving in his room close to him, "Answer me!" 

"I don't feel like talking F/n." 

"Well, I do answer the damn question jerk." 

"Why weren't you at school today?" He snapped at me.

"Because I wasn't. Now answer me why'd you fight him? You don't see me fighting Petra." I snapped back at him.

Levi stood up and pushed passed me, "I don't even know what I fucking bother with you sometimes." 

"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked following him.

"You're dumb as shit F/n! Why do you even go out with that prick? The asshole was going to rape you! And you went back like an idiot. And then you had sex with him!" Levi yelled at me.

"What?" I was so confused, "Okay, first of all, we've been over this. It was a mistake on both our parts. And two we did not." 

Levi rolled his eyes, "That just proves my point still, he's an asshole. You shouldn't be with him."

"Levi, just because you don't like him. Doesn't mean I can't like him. You don't see me having all these issues with Petra?" I was getting frustrated, why does he always have to make it such a big deal? "Why can't you just be supportive and happy for me?" I snapped at him.

Levi looked so angry, "Damn it F/n because I love you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> That was a lot, right? And I'm only getting started! I really hope you all enjoyed the chapter! 
> 
> Random note about this story, I'm not 100% sure how long this story will be, and that's mostly because of how I write chapters. I usually start a chapter knowing where I want to start and end it and knowing what I want to happen between it too, an example is I started this chapter knowing they were going to be at the pool and I was going to end it with Levi finally admitting his feelings, and for the middle I knew they were going to play truth or dare and I knew there was going to be a fight, and then I write it. I just usually don't know the details of how those things will happen until I actually start writing if you get me.
> 
> But because I write like that makes it a bit harder to know how long the story itself will be or even the chapter, though I usually try to make them about 4 to 6 thousand words.
> 
> That being said I see this story going into the 30's maybe 40's chapter wise.
> 
> Now that being said, I will say this story is a bit angsty if you haven't noticed, and I'll be honest it's going to get worse before it gets better. 
> 
> Why am I saying all this to simply put it, I call this a fair warning for what is to come ;) but don't worry you'll get fluff too <3 
> 
> anyways you all are the best! Your comments give me life and I love every single one of you!! I hope you all have wonderful days and thank you again for reading!!
> 
> until the next chapter
> 
> xoxo


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter
> 
> \o/ *throws giltter*

Your Pov

I stared at Levi.

My mind was banking out. What did he say? No, he didn't mean it like that, I'm overthinking it. I shook my head, "I love you too Levi, But, you can't act li-" 

"Goddamnit f/n." Levi snapped, "I'm in love with you." 

"I...I..No, what?" I asked him. Levi was in love with me? This didn't make sense. No, no way. I stood there; I didn't know what to say to him, "No you don't Levi." 

"I do, F/n. And I think you have feelings for me too," Levi said walking closer to me.

Oh, God what was he doing? I shook my head, "No. this isn't right, no. You like Petra, you're girlfriend is Petra. Levi you're not supposed to like me." 

"I don't love Petra F/n. I love you, I've always loved you, Are you telling me you don't feel the same?" 

I shook my head, I almost starting Laughing this was crazy, "No Levi! You're my friend, nothing more." 

I saw Levi look tense, "Then why did you kiss me back, when I kissed you that day?" 

"I...I...I don't know. I wasn't thinking I don't know why I did that." I answered him. 

"Bullshit, You feel something for me, I know you have too," He told me walking closer.

I just stared at him, why was this going now? Wasn't this what I wanted? I should be happy Levi is telling me how he feels and he has feelings for me. This is a dream come true. But this doesn't feel right. It shouldn't be this way. He has a girlfriend. I have Erwin. 

Levi was in front of me, "Look, F/n." Levi looked into my eyes. He looked so sincere. Oh, my God, he really meant this."You're one of the most important people in my life. I'm in love with you, I've been forever, I'm sorry I've waiting so damn long to tell you. But I couldn't go another minute keeping it too myself." 

What do I say to this? "Levi," Do I tell him the truth? This is so wrong though. If I tell him how I feel what will it mean for our friendship? What will this do to us? "This is crazy." 

"F/n." 

I pushed myself from him. Doesn't he realize us being together won't cause anything but trouble? It's a bad idea. "I'm sorry." 

"You're telling me, you care about Erwin more than me?" He asked.

"No. That's not what I'm saying." I told him.

"Okay, then what? You don't like me, and you'd rather be with him?" He looked like he was getting angry. 

"This has nothing to do with Erwin; it's us...I just don't feel the same way about you." I lied. I couldn't risk it. Levi is just too important to me it won't work out. If we brake up then what? I'd have to live without him, and I can't do that.

"I know you're lying F/n," Levi said in a calmer voice. 

I shook my head, "I'm not." 

This was hard. 

I wanted this so bad, but I just know I can't have this. It can't be this way. It would only ruin us. Levi is too important to let go. I need him in my life. I can't do this. Why didn't he see that?

Levi wiped a tear that was falling from my face, "What are you scared of? You know we belong together?" 

I pushed his hand away, and wiped my own face, "No. I have to go." Then I pushed passed Levi. I couldn't be here. Levi wasn't in his right mind. He wasn't thinking straight. I needed to leave.

"F/n," I heard him call out but ignored him. I needed air.

I needed to get away.

Levi Pov

What the fuck did I just do?

F/n just left. 

Why did I have to tell her the truth right there? I should have waited. That wasn't even a good time to tell her, but it just came out. I was so angry I just wanted her to know the truth. But now she's gone.

What the hell am I supposed to do now?

I ran my hands through my hair. 

I fucked up. 

I should have told her at a better moment. When we weren't arguing maybe then, it would have been fine? Fuck, what do I do? Should I leave her alone? Do I follow her? She was crying I know she feels the same, she has too. She kissed me back, and even when she said she didn't I know she was lying. She always has that look in her eyes when she's lying. But why did she feel like she had to lie about it? Why doesn't she want to be with me?

"So F/n looked upset. What did you do?" 

I looked over Mikasa had just walked in. She was taking off her earphones and looking at me, "What you do now?" 

I looked at her, "I told her out I felt," I told her. 

Mikasa's eyes went big. "For real? And she left? Why?" 

"I'm wondering the same thing," I told her shaking my head. I didn't want to be here; I needed to get out and clear my head. "I'm leaving," 

"Where are you going?" Mikasa asked me. 

"Out," I told her getting my keys from the wall where we had them hung up. Then I left out; I needed time to think.

Your Pov

Levi is in love with me.

Him saying those words just keep replaying in my head over and over again. What am I supposed to do with that? I should be happy. This should be the best day of my life. He said he's been in love with me for a while.

I shook my head; he couldn't though. I would have figured it out by now then. There weren't any signs to give it away. Where they? 

The only thing that my mind is going to is that kiss. He kissed me because he liked me and not because he just wanted to try out how it would be? Uggh! I pulled at my hair. How? This whole time Levi's felt the same way about me? This is crazy! This is insane. Levi...Levi is in love with me. 

What the Fuck am I supposed to do now?

Did he even care about how Petra? What am I supposed to do about Erwin? 

I just drop him. ANd he can't do that to Petra; that would be wrong. 

I can't believe all this time I've been trying to stop liking him, but he's been feeling the same way. What is the world? All this time everyone was right. We were in love with each other...I just never really believed it was true for Levi as much as it was for me. But what does this mean now? Wait, I told Levi I didn't feel the same. I left out, what does he think now? 

Does he see it now though? If we got together what happens if we brake up? We wouldn't be friends anymore, Why would he want to risk it? Isn't what we have enough? I huffed out, What type of question is that? I know it would never be enough. But still...

I can't like Levi. 

We can't be together. 

I will not risk our relationship, because of stupid hormones. Levi will thank me. 

I took a deep breath; this was for the best. Levi and I just need some space from each other right now. He needs time to get his head right; then he'll see why we can't be together. Levi is smart. 

This was for the best. 

~~Later~~

I was avoiding Levi today. 

Yesterday he told me he loved me, but I've decided no matter how much I wanted to tell him I was in love with him too I can't. So I'm avoiding him. It's for the best is what I keep telling myself. I can't let our emotions ruin us. 

Leaving out this morning I managed to leave before him. So that was good, the only downside is we still have two classes together, but I know I can get by. Or who knows maybe Levi would have slept on it and got his mind right and will see why it won't work.

I must say it was strange though as I walked through the school this morning, it felt like everyone was staring at me. Like they were all talking behind my back. What is it now? Did he tell someone? After I went home yesterday, I just cried and went to sleep. So I didn't get on facebook or anything to know what was going on.

Maybe this had something to do with the fight yesterday.

Now that I think about it I never found out why they started fighting in the first place. And I can't ask Levi now...I guess I'll have to ask Erwin.

I walked up to his him standing by his locker with his friends. "Morning," I told him, but as soon as I saw his face, I saw his left eye was bruised. Now that I think about it, I didn't see Levi injured. I guess Levi got him pretty good. I went to touch his face, "I'm sorry Levi is such a jerk sometimes." 

Erwin winched a little, "Oh, F/n." 

"What did you two even get into it about?" I asked him.

A flash of nervousness crossed Erwin's eyes, "Um. Levi didn't tell you?" 

I sighed, "Levi and I aren't really talking right now, Er...I'm mad at him for getting you like this," I lied. I didn't need him knowing the real reason.

Erwin just looked uneasy. 

"What is it?" I asked, "What happened?" 

Erwin looked away from me and to his friends, "Give us a sec," He told them, and they all left some of them laughing and looking at us.

What was that? I looked back at Erwin, "Everything okay?" 

"Okay F/n, sometimes I can be a jerk." 

I nodded giving him a little smile, "Yeah, I know. You and Levi have that in common more then you think." 

Erwin sighed, "Well, sometimes I say stuff without really thinking about it."

I rolled my eyes, "Get to the point." 

Erwin looked at me like he was wondering if he should continue. I couldn't help but get an uneasy feeling, what did he do? 

"See, I was talking with the guys yesterday in the locker room, and they all were just pressuring me asking about our relationship, so said something might have happened between us when it didn't," He told me.

I looked at him blankly, "Okay? Meaning?" I wasn't getting what he was putting down.

"I told them we had sex and some other stuff. But I told them not to tell anyone, but bottom line someone did, and now there's a rumor going around about us...Well, mostly you. Plus it didn't help you weren't at school yesterday." Erwin told me.

"Seriously?" I yelled. I was lost for words. 

How could he? "What the fuck Erwin?" I yelled at him.

"Look I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking. I'll fix this." He said.

God, I was so angry, I would slap him. So I did, "What the fuck?" 

Erwin looked back at me, "I deserved that." 

Damn right he did! "How could you do that to me? I thought you liked me." 

"I do, and I'm sorry." He said looking sad, but I was just too angry. 

"So this is why Levi fought you?" I put the pieces together; he must have heard about this and then went to confront him about it. Which now explains why Levi thought I had sex with Erwin yesterday. I guess I can see why Levi was upset now.

And for a good reason, "I'm glad Levi gave you a black eye," I snapped at him.

"F/n I am sorry, I know you must be upset with me," He said, but I was done hearing him talk. No wonder everyone seemed like they were talking about me this morning! Because they were! He was going around telling lies and now everyone this I'm some slut most likely. 

"You know what Erwin we need a break," I told him.

Sadness crossed his face, and he actually looked really sorry, but I didn't care. He can't do stuff like this. I don't want everyone talking about me like this around the school. I just don't need that type of drama. 

"Listen I'm sorry, I can fix this, don't break up with me." Erwin pleaded.

But I didn't care, I was so angry, "I don't have time for this, " I said shaking my head at him, "I have to get to class." Then I left him there. 

I can not believe him. What the fuck. I knew he liked to showboat in fount of his friends, but this was something to the next level. He ruined my reputation, and who knows how long this will last? That bastard. Levi was right. Fuck. This wouldn't have happened if I listened to him and never got with Erwin. Shit. 

How the hell am I supposed to fix this?

"F/n?" I looked to my side only to see Levi crept up beside me without me noticing. 

"Levi," I said shocked. Why was he here?

"We need to talk." He said.

I can't do this now, "No, Levi." I told him.

"F/n you can't avoid me like this," He said grabbing my arm to stop walking and look at him.

But I snatched away from him, "No, Levi. I don't have time for his right now," 

"F/n-" He said.

"I don't have time for you right now Levi," I snapped. 

Levi's jaw tensed up, "You don't mean that we just need to talk," 

"I don't want to talk Levi; I want you to leave me alone right now, okay." Then I walked off leaving him there. 

There is just too much going on in my life right now. 

I just need a break from life.

 

Levi Pov

It's been a fucking mouth. 

She'a avoided me ever since that day.

F/n literally won't talk to me. I've tried and she just tells me she can't and worst she just looks like she's about to cry. 

I fucked up, so bad.

Why did I think it was a good idea to tell her how I felt? I was fooling myself thinking she could feel the same way. She clearly didn't. Maybe I just wanted her too so much I believed it. We were better off as friends.

And I fucked it up. 

On the bright side I heard she broke up with Erwin. 

But it didn't matter now; she won't even talk to me. I don't even know how to fix this. Because I won't tell her I don't have feelings for her anymore, because then I'd be lying. And I know even if we did go back to being just friends it wouldn't be the same. It will never be the same between us. 

"How you doing?" 

I looked at my mom who was standing in my doorway.

"I'm fine." 

"You sure?" She asked walking in and leaning on my wall.

"Peachy," I told her.

"You know you're usually more excited then this the night before your opening day," She started to say, "You and F/n like to pregame I remember you telling me that last year before your into the woods performance I think." 

I just clicked my tongue at her.

"Speaking of F/n." 

"She doesn't want to be bothered with me right now," I told her. 

"Yeah, Mikasa told me." My mom said.

"Seems like you and everyone else was wrong," I said glancing out my window to F/n's room. She's been keeping her window and curtains down to keep me out.

"I'm sure she's just a bit confused right now, you gotta give her time." 

I rolled my eyes, "A mouth, it's been a month since she's said anything to me." 

My mom chuckled a little; I didn't find anything funny about this. "You've been keeping count?" She teased.

"Tch, what are you in here for?" I snapped at her.

"Calm down; I was just checking on you. And I was here to tell you Mikasa, and I will see your show tomorrow night." She told me.

"Okay." 

My mom started to leave out, "And Levi?" 

"Huh?" 

"I'm sure F/n will show up tomorrow too, She used to say it all the time how she was your biggest fan. She's never missed a show; I doubt she'll miss this one." Then my mom left out my room.

I sighed, I hope so. I looked back at her window.

I hope so.

Your Pov

I missed Levi. 

But I didn't know how to talk to him anymore; I didn't know how to just be his friend when now I know he wanted more. So that's why I've been avoiding him, I thought if I didn't talk to him for a while he would realize how bad it was for us to be together and we'd go back to normal. 

But we didn't.

And I don't think we were. 

This fucking sucked. In the last month, I've lost my best friend, my boyfriend and my good reputation. And it fucking sucked ass. I hated everything. The universe is always out to get me, and I don't know why.

"Are you driving or me?" My mom asked walking into my room.

I looked over at her from my closet as I was trying to find something to wear, "Ever hear of knocking?" 

"Ever hear I'm the one paying the bills?" She told me.

I nodded my head with a little laugh, "Sorry," 

"Anyway, you want to drive or me?" She asked.

"Ugh, You can drive," I told her. We were going out tonight.

To be specific, we were going out to Levi's opening night. 

I know I'm not talking to him, but that doesn't mean I have to stop supporting him...This was a big deal for him; I still knew that...And I'd like to think I didn't have to miss this. If anything I want him to know I still care. 

"So does this mean the two of you are talking again?" She asked me.

I sighed, "No." 

"So why are you going? F/n we haven't really talked about it, but Kuchel told me what Mikasa's told her, how do you feel?" 

"What's to say?" I huffed out, "Our friendship is over, Levi and F/n is over."

"Don't you think you're being a bit dramatic?" She asked me; I heard the worry in her voice.

I shrugged, "No? I don't know?" I said feeling sadder the more I talked. I hated this. I hated my life right now. 

My mom came over and hugged me, "Why don't you just talk to him?" 

I hugged her back, "Because I don't know what to say," I told her.

She pulled away from me, "What do you feel?' 

"I love him obviously!" I told her.

My mom just smiled, she almost seemed like she was going to laughing, "So what's the deal?" 

"It would ruin us? What if we break up? Then I would lose a boyfriend and my best friend." I snapped at her, why was I the only one who could see this?

"So?" She said I frowned, what does she mean so?

"You and Levi have loved each other for a long time, and even if you broke up, I'm 100% sure your relationship with each other wouldn't break down that bad. And anyway that's life, sometimes people grow apart, you know that." She told tell me. "You're looking at the negatives of this too much. You have to calm down let yourself be happy." 

I didn't say anything. 

Was she right?

Should I just let go, and say screw it? I know if I were with Levi I would be happy. But...there were so many what ifs...

My mom got up, "Hurry up, his show stars in like two hours, I know you want to get good seats." Then she left out. 

Maybe I should just talk to Levi...

I sighed, what am I going to do? 

Suddenly my phone started to ring. I looked at it and saw it was Levi.

My eyes went wide. Why was he calling me? He should be getting ready for his play. What's this about. And even if he wasn't why would he be calling me?

"Levi?" I answered.

"F/n, I need your help." He said.

What? What was going on? Was he okay? "What is it, Levi?" 

"I need you to come to the college as fast as you can...Please." 

That was a warning sign Levi didn't say please like ever. "I'll be there in a few," I told him hanging up. 

I don't know what was going on with him, but I knew he needed me. And I have to be there for him. 

He was still my best friend no matter what happens between us.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Whatever could be happening to Levi???
> 
> Okay, you all have spoken and I will listen, next chapter fluff and all that good stuff! And you all can expect all that good stuff for the next few chapters :) but when I do go back to the angst it's going to be hard to enjoy it while you can *Evil laughs*
> 
> I hope you all enjoyed this chapter also what was that like 3 chapters in one week? What is the world coming too lol (let's see if I can make it 4?? No promises though)
> 
> until the next chapter!
> 
> xoxo


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took long enough but here's a new chapter!
> 
> I would like to let you guys know a little fix I had to make in earlier chapters I said reader and Levi were 17 But after some thinking, I realized for this story to work they are actually 18 so that's just a little note for you guys to know.
> 
> Now with that enjoy this chapter. 
> 
> oh, um here are the links to the play that's in this chapter. So just copy and paste it if you want to see it.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Wzphnb0qws
> 
> here's another one that you all might like 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gpad8LUEwsg
> 
> btw own nothing.

Your Pov

I was going to kill Levi.

"You called me out there for this, I thought you were in trouble." I said glaring at him.

"I am in trouble," Levi sighed, "You're the only one I know who can do this, F/n" 

"Where the hell is Petra?" I asked him. 

"She's sick and went home, And the main actress Delilah literally just broke her arm, No one else knows the leads part." He told me.

"And you think I do? Levi, I can not go on stage! I don't know the parts." 

"But you've been here and watched us. You've even helped me with my lines; I know you know all the songs the director said he could work with that, we just need someone to fill the shoes, and I know you can do it." He told me. Levi looked desperate. But this was insane.

"Levi I can't." 

"F/n, you're the only one I know that can help." 

I shook my head, "What about any other girl in the play? Someone else can be able to do it." 

"That's the thing the other girls can't do it," He told me, "If they could I wouldn't have called you." I could tell this was stressing him out, and from what I can see everyone in the back of the stage was frecking out too. This was a mess. 

As I was talking to Levi the director walked up to us, "So can you do it?" He asked me, "I'm sorry it's so short notice, but Levi tells me you can sing and know all the songs."

God, even he looked like this was a disaster, "Okay, even if I did do it, I don't know all the lines? Huh? What are you going to do about that?" I asked them.

The director ran his fingers through his hair, "We can work that one of the stages hands will help you for the scenes. Just can you do it?" 

He and Levi both stared at me, this was crazy. I looked at Levi; he looked so nervous. This was important to him, and for this to happen on opening night is insane. "Fine," I told him sighing, 

A spark of hope shined in his eyes, "For real?" 

I rolled my eyes at him, "Yes, but you owe me, Levi," 

Levi smirked at me, "I'll owe you as long as you don't fall on the stage."

I rolled my eyes again and started to head to the back of the stage, I can't believe he's talked me into this. But before I left Levi grabbed my arm. His face was stern, "Seriously F/n, thank you. I know you still don't want anything to do with me, so it means a lot." 

"Levi, I-" I started to talk, but he cut me off.

"It's fine, I'll wait for when you're ready to talk about it." Then Levi walked off. 

I frowned. He didn't even get me a chance to talk to him about it. Cause I am ready to talk about it. 

I thought about it while I was on my way here. My mom was right; I should let myself me happy. Levi and I could work out. And if we didn't...that might be okay too. We've known each other long enough that If we break up, I'm sure we can be civil about it. But he didn't even give me a chance just now to say anything. I figured when he called me it was in an emergency, but once it was over, I would tell him, that I want to give us a try. 

But I didn't stop to think if he still felt the same way. Maybe it was selfish of me to think it would work that way; it's been a mouth after all. And now that I think about it I haven't heard anything new about Petra. I mean they can still be dating for all I know. I shook my head. I don't need to think about this now; I need to focus and learn some lines so I won't look like a complete idiot tonight. I swear only Levi could get me to do something so insane. I am about to go on stage and sing and act in a musical I've never been trained to do. 

God, what is my life?

Levi Pov

F/n was here. 

I was surprised she even answered her phone, but the thing that matters most was that she was here. I sighed to myself, she might not know all the lines but she can sing, I can work with that. 

This was crazy. The morning performance we had today went fine without a hitch, no problems anywhere the high school came to see it, they liked it, everyone was hype for tonight. Then in the last hour, everything just went to hell. First Petra got sick and was trowing up. Then Delilah broke her fucking arm playing around while we were all in the lobby waiting to get ready for the next show. It was a hot mess. But tonight F/n was my savor. I looked over; she was with one of the guys right now learning some of her opening lines. 

I ran my hand through my hair. She could do this. If anyone could do this, she could. All the other girls here just couldn't pull it off even Petra isn't that good at the songs if you ask me. But F/n...she can do it. It's really the music I was worried about. I can work with her and the lines but she knew all the lyrics, and she had the voice. Plus the director was trying to find someone, and he didn't even want to use the other girls in the show, so I told him about F/n. 

I'm just lucky she picked up her phone. 

Weird that this is how we start talking again. But who knows she might go back to not talking to me after this. I shook my head, but we can deal with that later. I walked over to see how she was doing. 

"You doing okay over here?" I asked her looking.

F/n nodded giving me a small smile, "Ugh, Yeah I'm sure I can manage...Er, you doing okay?" 

"You're nervous?" I asked her.

F/n nodded, "How did you tell?" She asked me sarcastically, "I mean Levi I'll do it but this is insane I bearly have an hour to get this, and it's the led part, who does this shit?" The weight of what was going on is coming to her now. I hope she doesn't change her mind.

"F/n clam down."

"Calm down?" She said with her eyes wide, "I'm as calm as I can be Levi!" 

I sighed, the last thing I needed to do was piss her off. I needed her here, "Tch, you'll do fine, just keep going over everything," I told her walking away. I didn't need to distract her anymore. I walked back to the dressing room where some of the other guys whose names I could never be bothered with remembering were at, "This is crazy, Dailah and Petra just went out like that." I heard one of them say.

"It's almost like someone said Macbeth in here," The other guy said.

I turned and glared at him.

"What?" 

"Dude you can't say Macbeth in a theater, and especially right before the performance." Is friend told him.

I stared at both of them. Why was I always surrounded by idiots all the time?

"I know that I was just saying-" 

"How about you two just shut up?" I said to him.

I wasn't superstitious, but this show was already going to hell I do need to risk it turning into any more of a shit show. I still had a lot ride on this play; this might make or break me with this scholarship that I want. And it's not even that I want it. I need it. I need to get out of the house. I know my mom doesn't want me to know, but it's hard trying to make ends meet in that house. And it's not enough that she works every day, it's getting hard on her, and I know it. Worst she won't let me get a job until I'm done with school, so I can't even help her. So if I get this scholarship, it will help me pay for school while living on campus. The only downside is I'll be moving away from F/n. But I"m still holding out that she'll come to the same college as me.

"But that girl you got to come in is hot, where do you know her from?" Another guy said making me look at him.

"Tch, she's just a friend," I told him.

"How old is she?" He asked. 

"She has a boyfriend," I told him. I didn't want to hear them drool all over F/n. So I told them that to just shut them up. 

"Oh really? What do you think his reaction will be when she has to do dead girl walking?" One of them asked. 

And that's when I remembered that scene. "Shit."

How could I forget that part? Fuck, How did I forget about all the kissing I had to do in this show? If she remembers it F/n is going to freak out, I just know it. We have to kiss on stage, and not just once, like half the fucking play. Shit. She's going to freak out. I walked back out to see her. Hopefully she hadn't realized it. In an ideal scenario, F/n wouldn't mind. But she knows how I feel about her now, and that changes everything. If she knows that will have to kiss and dry hump on the stage she won't want to do it. She'd probably run away, but if I can talk to her about it maybe we'll be okay, and I can convince her it's no big deal. 

"Where is F/n?" I asked one of the stage managers.

"Oh, she's in the back getting ready we go on in 30, and so far we have a full house." Robert, the stage manager, told me.

"Seriously?" I asked looking out in the audience from the stage, and sure enough, he was right. Why were there so many people here?...I'm worried for F/n. Can she really do this?

Your Pov

I can do this. 

I can do this. 

Can I do this? I was trying to convince myself; I can do this. I'll do this for Levi. He needs me to help him with this, and goddamnit I was going to do it. 

"Okay, I need everyone to be quiet. F/n get ready," One of the guys told me, I think his name is, Robert. 

I can't believe I'm about to do this. I haven't seen how many people are out there, but I know it's a lot from how loud it is. God, I just hope I don't fall on my face. Everyone here helped me out as much as they could on short notice, although I wish I could have gone over my lines with Levi. But I guess it's okay, I knew some of them since I've practiced with him, but that was over a month ago. Hopefully, I'll be alright, the lines with the other girls and was a bit hard. I was okay with the little dance moves I had to learn. The only issue that I'm really nervous about is that one big song I have...plus I have to kiss Levi...It's going to be so awkward. I didn't even think about that when I agreed to this. I had forgotten all about it. I have to actually make it look like I'm having sex with Levi, my childhood friend! I can only wonder what he's thinking about this. I mean he's had to realize it by now. 

I wanted to talk to him about it, to say I'll be okay, but last I asked he was in the back still getting ready. He doesn't have to come on until after the opening. He's the lucky one. I, on the other hand, was the person running the show. Why did they think this was a good idea? I shook my head; I can't have doubts now. I need to focus. I think I might be okay. I should be okay; I'm ready.

God, I hope I'll be okay.

Suddenly I felt someone hold my hand. I looked it was Levi. 

He just stood there beside me.

I squeezed his hand, and he squeezed back. 

I smiled to myself, it was moments like this that just made love him. He always knew what to do. I took a deep breath. Levi was here, I wasn't going to fail, because he was here.

"You okay?" 

I nodded. 

It was show time. 

Levi pov

F/n was doing fine. 

She got through the first song without an issue. As a matter of fact, she's been doing pretty good for all her songs, It was just some of the random lines she stumbled over, but for the most part, you couldn't tell, she was just improvising. I knew she could do it. I hadn't been talking to her since the show started I didn't want to distract her, whenever she was off stage she went right back to the script to make sure she had as much of the lines as she could. 

But she had all her songs. 

I could tell everyone was in awe of her voice. I was proud of her. F/n was doing fine. She actually looked like she was getting into it. To me, she seemed like if she practiced enough, she could be a natural at this. I don't know why she never got into theater with me. She'd always say this was my thing, but I feel like she tried she can be better than me.

"Levi, get ready to go on," Robert told me. 

Shit. This was it.

She was going to sing this song, and we were going to kiss, and we had to make it look real. Was she going to be alright? I ran my hands through my hair. We could do this. If it comes down to it, I might have to take control of the kiss. It's would be no big deal. I won't get ahead of myself. It would be simple. Nothing to freak out about.

Looking out at the stage I could see they were finishing up their scene, and it was my turn to get on the stage. 

Here we go.

Your pov

I didn't have time to think. I had to keep count. They all just left the stage. 

I took a deep breath, I looked over and saw Levi getting on the stage, Oh, god I had to kiss him. I gotta make it look real.

I took another breath and started to sing.

All while I sang In the back of my head I was going crazy. I'm about to kiss him! But I kept my cool. It felt like all my nervous we're getting more and more on edge, but I liked it? Like I could feel the lyrics of the song, and the way the audience seemed to enjoy everything was getting me going too. This was crazy. 

I got to the part where I was singing to Levi. God, he was beautiful. The way he looked at me, the way he was making me feel...I want to kiss him. It's a shame this was how we had to start talking again. But it's okay after all this was over I'm definitely talking to him...I can only pray he wants me still.

Levi Pov

I wasn't breathing heavy on purpose, but F/n was in front of me singing her heart out, she was beautiful. And I'd be lying if I said I wasn't excited about kissing her right now. Just a few more lines. Seeing her look at me with all these emotions going through her eyes, it was like she was really singing to me the way she touched me, God, I wanted her. 

"Let's make this beautiful!" she sang. 

Finally.

"That works for me!"

But surprisingly, F/n pulled me in the kiss. And her lips were just as I remembered them. But better. This was everything I ever wanted. God, everything in this moment was perfect. Expect the audience that's watching us. I have to remember we weren't at home. And this isn't real F/n is just acting...no matter how real it felt this wasn't real...It was just a show.

F/n pulled away from me and his her note she had in the song. I sat back up to look back at her, and there was this fire glowing in her that I hadn't seen in a long time as the song.

How was she so fucking perfect?

Your pov

At this point, I think only I'm running off adrenaline now.

I made out with Levi. That couldn't even be considered just a kiss. That was so intense every moment I had to kiss him on the stage was insane. It was way more than the two times we've kissed before. And what made it so crazy was I did that in fount so many people! But I couldn't start to think about them that would just throw me off. 

Levi was singing now, we were just about at the end of our last song for this act. I think I was doing alright, every time I went to the back someone would say I was doing great. I really hope so. At this point, I was actually having fun. But I know it's going to be so weird talking to Levi once this scene is over. I don't even know how to start talking to him after this. But I do know we're going to have to talk for a minute about all this...

Levi held me close in his arms as we both sang the last lyrics of the song, and the curtains finally closed ending act one.

Levi moved away from me but his hands were still lingering on my waist, "Levi..." I started to say, But Levi moved away completely now, "You're doing great." Then he started to walk away, but I stopped him this time.

"Levi wait, we have to talk." 

"We can do this later, let's just get this show done for now." Then Levi walked away again.

I wished he'd just let me talk about this now, cause it's going to be killing me for the rest of the night. We've kissed...did it mean anything to him now? Or is him blowing me off like this his way of saying it isn't any important to him? Like is he not going crazy in his head right now? 

"Wow, F/n you're doing really good." I turned to see the girl that was playing the main heather talking to me. I think her name was Taylor. 

I smiled, "Thanks..." 

"No, like for real though, I was kinda scared since you know they called you last minute, but you're doing well, keeping in time and everything. Have you done theater before?" She asked.

I shook my head, "No, this has always just been Levi's thing, not mine." 

"Oh, so you know Levi then?" 

"He's um, just a childhood friend of mine, " I told her. 

She smiled, "Oh, I thought you'd say he's your boyfriend or something." 

I mustered up a fake laugh, "No...He's just my friend." 

"Well, that's too bad. I'm totally shipping the two of you," She said laughing, "You guys have crazy chemistry like omg." 

"Well, that's a new one." I said out loud, but then I shook my head, "Er, we're just friends. But I'll but talk to you later I have to go over some more lines." Then I walked away. 

That was a new one. Levi and I have good chemistry? Well, I was in love with him, maybe that was a sign he was in love with me? I shook my head to myself; focus! I can't keep thinking about Levi and me not at a time like this. The play still has little over an hour, and then I can call this over. Jesus, I wonder what my mom is out there thinking of all this? I know she's out here watching, fuck! What are his mom and Mikasa thinking about all this? They saw us kissing? Shit, we are never going to live this down.

I went ahead and sat down and started to read my spirit again. 

All while I had read people kept telling me how great I was doing. Everyone except Levi. I looked over at him it was like he was in his own little world. So much for the chemistry between us. He doesn't even want to talk to me. And I wish he would. He should goddamn I was doing all this for him! He's so ungrateful! I sighed, but then again, maybe this is how he is before he has to get on stage, this is really important to him. 

I should just make sure I get through this second act without ruining it.

~~Later~~ 

Levi Pov

Finally, the play was over.

We were all taking our bows, while the audience cheered. I was relieved. The play went just fine. F/n did great. Everyone loved her, she was amazing, and by way, the crowd cheered for her the all agreed. I smiled when it was my turn bow, they all cheered. Two more nights of this. 

F/n did so well, I kinda wish Petra stays sick. If I can do this with F/n for the rest of the weekend I think it would be alright, But I doubt she'd be alright with that. I looked over to her and saw she was smiling at out at everyone. I think she actually had fun. At least I hope she did. 

I took her hand, and we both bowed. 

F/n is amazing; I could have never done this without her.

But now it was over, and I had this pain in my stomach. 

It was all just the play, the way she was holding me, the way she was looking at me, it was all just for a show. F/n kept saying how she wanted to talk, but I can only hope it's something good. I really hate not being sure. The curtain closed and music finally went off telling everyone that it was all officially over, and you would feel everyone seem relieved.

"Omg, Levi I did it!" F/n said jumping in my arms. 

It surprised me I wasn't ready for it, but my reflects are quick. F/n pulled her face away so that she could look at me; then she seemed like she realized what she was doing so she just slowly started to back away from me. "Er, sorry." 

"It's fine." 

I honestly missed seeing her act like her goofy, carefree self. 

F/n frowned, "Well, the show is over...can we talk now?" 

"F/n c-" But before I could finish the director came and patted me on the back.

"You kids did great. Levi, you were exceptional." He told me. The director had been telling me that since he cast me, but it was still nice to hear. "And you F/n! Our savior! You were amazing! Wonderful. You messed up a lot, but you kept pushing. But that voice! Levi, why didn't you audition with her? F/n where were you when we were holding them?" 

F/n smiled, "Er honestly theater isn't really my thing. I was just trying to help out tonight." 

"Well, you did wonderfully we are in your debt," He told her kissing her hand. I rolled my eyes, that was uncalled for. But I guess the man was happy. I think if it had come down to it he would have put on a wig and did her part. So I guess he's really happy she saved the day.

"Hey Levi! F/n!" The both of us looked back to some of the other cast members, "We're going out once we get changed, the two of you should come with." 

"Oh that's fine." F/n said before I could answer them. She started to walk toward them. "I really need to head home, so I'm going just change and leave." She told them going into the girls dressing room.

I sighed, I wonder why she didn't want to go? Maybe she just wants to leave cause she's tired. Maybe she wanted to talk to me.

I can never know with her anymore. 

Your Pov

I was walking out to the lobby, My mom texted me that that's where she would be. Once I got out there, I saw she and Kuchel we standing together. Both with flowers in their hands. When did my mom have time to get me flowers?

"Hey?" I said once I was close enough to them.

"F/n!" They both screamed and hugged me. 

"Wow, wasn't expecting this," I said hugging them back as best I could.

"You did so great baby!" My mother told me, "I'm so proud of you, here." Then she handed me the flowers.

"Ugh, thanks mom." 

"You and Levi did so well," Kuchel said, "Where is Levi anyway?" 

"I think he's still changing." I told her. 

"You guy made a cute couple... besides the whole murder thing." Mikasa said.

I rolled my eye at her I knew one of them would say something. 

"Oh yes," My mom looked at Kuchel then at me. "You would think that wasn't their first time kissing the way they were moving." 

"Mmmhmm," Kuchel humed. 

I rolled my eyes again, "It was," I lied. "Anyway it was just a play..." 

"Is that how Levi feels?" My mom asked.

I shrugged, "I don't know." I answered her.

Because I didn't. We haven't got a chance to talk yet, And I don't know what he's thinking like at all, he's been blowing me off this whole show. I...I just don't know, but as soon as I see him, I'm going to do my best to fix that. I just want to clear the air between us. Like we may have been able to act like we liked each other on the stage. But in reality, there is so much awkward between us. And I just hope us talking to each other would clear it up.

"There you are!" I looked over Levi was here, and his mom had him in her arms hugging her. "You did so well; you're just my little superstar." 

I couldn't help but smiled. 

They were so cute. 

"So what are you guys up to know?" Mikasa asked looking between Levi and me.

"Huh?" 

"We're going to all go out to eat to celebrate, the two of you coming along?" Kuchel asked.

I looked at Levi, who had looked back at me. Was he waiting to see what I was going to say? I looked back at my mom, "Yeah, but first, we're going to go home. I wanted to change, and he's going to drive us there in his car. I feel like we got too many cars out tonight know what I mean?" 

"No, Your mom rode with us," Mikasa said. 

"Tch, you get what she meant. See you later." Levi said walking off.

I guess he was in a hurry... I just can't figure out with him anymore. I looked back at Kuchel my mom and Mikasa. "Er, just text us when you get there we'll be on our way," I told them.

My mom just looked at me up and down, "Mmmhmm, we'll wait." 

I know she thought we were up to something. "It's not even like that I'm going to go home. We'll you meet you there." I told them waving them off. 

I got to my car to already see Levi had left. Why can't I figure him out anymore? Is this really what A whole month of not talking does? Or this is because I know how he feels...Or how he felt. At this point, it's honestly exhausting. I wish he'd just talk to me; we could have talked out here. I just...I just want to tell him how I feel. That I love him back. 

I shook my head; I just have to do this. I have to rip this off like a band-aid. He has to still feels something for me, I mean with the way he kissed me tonight...or he was just acting...No. 

No.

I can't let myself think about this. I have to just do it. 

Levi Pov

I was at home now. 

I'm not avoiding F/n, but I don't really want to talk to now. I just don't know what will happen. It's fucking frustrating. It's not enough that she wants me to drive her to where ever our moms are, so she's bound to start talking then...I'm just not ready...

Just then my phone started buzzedI looked over it was F/n.

-Open your fucking window

I frowned and looked at my window, and she was standing there wanting to get in. What the fuck is she doing now? I walked over to my window and opened it, "What the hell F/n?" 

"Levi I've been trying to talk to you all day." She said. She looked out of breath and frustrated. 

"F/n-" 

"Shut up." She snapped. 

And I did.

"You have been blowing me off all night, and it's not fair. Because I saved your ass tonight, you could at least hear me out. I know it's been awkward as hell with us. But you need to know I'm sorry." She said to me.

"You don't have to do this-" 

"Can you shut up and just listen?" She snapped again and moved to sit on my bed. She put her head in her hands leaning over, "I'm sorry I freaked out when you told me how you felt. And I don't even know if you still feel the same way." Then she looked up at me, "But I love you, Levi." 

I felt like the whole world stopped at that moment.

F/n stood up, "I'm in love with you Levi, I've been for a while actually."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! 
> 
> It's taking a lot of time, but I finally finished this chapter, I really hope you all liked it, I tried to make it longer so I can get to the more fluffy stuff without a lot of waiting. But I have to say I'm not sure how I felt about this chapter.
> 
> Special shout out to ZingGirlZang I saw you mentioned you had a birthday so happy birthday!!! I'm very sorry I couldn't post this when you wanted, but sometimes I just don't have the time to get a chapter done. last week was just special and I was able to get a few chapters out, but that really meant I wasn't getting enough sleep. 
> 
> Remeber I'm working 12-hour shifts just about every day (like seriously I don't get a day off) But I'm not trying to make excuses for myself. This is a story I want to finish, I just can't be as dedicated to it as much as I like because well I need sleep too.
> 
> Anyways I digress, the reader had finally told Levi how she really feels and now all the real fun starts I hope your all excited.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whoop whoop new chapter!!

Your POV

Levi was staring at me. I didn't know what to do or say now. I had just told him how I felt. But he didn't say anything.

He just stared back at me.

Maybe he didn't hear me? 

"Levi?"

"Say it again," he finally spoke.

"How did you not hear me?" I asked feeling a bit embarrassed because he was looking at me so hard. 

"I heard you-you dumbass," he yelled at me. But then his voice went soft, and he looked away, "I just wanted to hear you say it again," 

The light blush over his face didn't go unnoticed by me. OMG, Levi was embarrassed too! "If I didn't know better Levi I'd say you were blushing," I teased him standing up and moving closer to him.

"Tch, I'm not." He snapped looking at me again, but then he quickly looked away again, "I wasn't expecting to hear you say that...ever"

I stared at Levi, he was so cute acting all shy like this. I honestly didn't know he could ever be shy. I kinda felt a little empowered I caught Levi off guard. That was rare. But I didn't want to gloat too much. I had told him how I felt but he still really hasn't told me how he feels. 

"Do you still love me, Levi?" I asked him. It was the one question that had been driving me crazy all night. And now I needed to know more than ever.

Levi blinked blankly at me like he couldn't believe I had just asked him. "Of fucking course you damn idiot." He said running his hands through his hair.

"Oh," was all I answered with. My mouth stuck in a circle shaped. I sat back down on his bed. So Levi is in love with me...

I felt Levi sit down beside me, "So we're in love with each other..." He said. 

"So we are..." I said not really believing it. I mean it was so long in the making to finally find out he's felt the same way.

"What now?" I asked.

Levi didn't say anything for a moment, "We go to dinner with our moms?"

Levi Pov

I didn't know what to do.

That's what it's always like for me when it comes to F/n, at least now. F/n had finally told me the one thing I wanted to hear for so long. That she was in love with me. Her exact words were she had been for a while; I wonder how long exactly. 

I looked over at F/n who was sitting in the passenger seat next to me; now that we've both confessed our feelings I feel like all those heavy clouds that were hovering over us are gone. But now it's just a lot of air between us. 

I don't know what to say to her. I don't know what to ask her. Should I just kiss her? Do I say I want her to be my girlfriend now? Do I act like everything is normal again?

"Er, I told them that, that was our first time kissing..." She spoke up. 

"They asked?" I asked her back; I knew she was talking about our parents.

"No, but you know them...Always joking about us being together..." She trailed off.

I huffed, "I guess they were right... " 

I could hear the smile in her voice, "After all this time, they knew, and we didn't." 

"Well, we knew. We just didn't tell each other," I told her. 

"I think we're both idiots..." She said.

I just hummed agreeing with her.

After that, we both went quite. 

Something had to be done about this. I'm not one hundred sure what I should do but I know I gotta fix it somehow, about is. It's like we're going back to how we were, but that's not what I wanted. I wanted us to be together, and I'm sure that's what she wants too, but I don't know what's stopping us. We were both just being dumb about this. I just don't know how to approach her about this now...

I pulled up to the restaurant that our parents were at along with Mikasa. I just feel like their going to start shit. That's what they all do. I don't see how now will be different. Especially after that show. They saw F/n and me making out, and if they don't say something, Mikasa certainly will. 

We walked in and saw them sitting at a table. They were already eating. Tch, they didn't have to start without us, we didn't take that long.

"Look whos here," (Moms name) said when she saw us.

"We didn't think you'd be able to make it." My mom spoke up.

"And why not?" F/n asked while she sat down.

"You know," Her mom started to say, "We figured the two of you had stuff to do." 

"Tch, If you guys were going to act like this we shouldn't have even bothered," I told them while I looked at the menu. We were all silent for a while; I guess no one had a lot to say. And I'm not complaining about that. All they liked to do was tease us, and I really don't need that right now. 

"So what happened to Petra?" Mikasa asked.

I groaned to myself. I should have known she would be the one to start something. "She got sick," I told her. But still, how did I forget about Petra? I'm still supposed to be dating her. I didn't even talk to F/n about her, and she's finally told me that she likes me obviously I was going to break up with Petra now. But now I feel bad; I've been using her this whole time. I just hope it doesn't hurt her that bad. I looked over at F/n I wonder what she's thinking now?

But she was only staring at her plate.

"Oh? That's said." (Moms name) said. "Poor girl, I hope she's better soon," 

"Does she know F/n took her place?" Mikasa asked.

"No." I answered. 

"What do you think she's thinking?" Mikasa asked again. She was trying to get a rise out of me.

"I don't know," I told her. 

"Okay, but do you think she'd get-" 

"Drop it," I told her. Mikasa just gave me a sly smile. God, she was such a brat. 

"Wait? Isn't Petra your girlfriend's name?" My mom asked. 

I closed my eyes sighing, "Yes." 

"Wait, your girlfriend was the lead in the play with you and had to go home, and F/n took her place?" (Moms name) Asked.

This was becoming a problem quickly, "Yes," Why was I the only one getting grilled? I glanced at F/n again, and she was still just staring at her plate. I wonder if she was upset. She did confess her feelings to me...I wonder if she even thought about Petra when she did and was now regretting it. 

"Oh, she's going to be angry." My mom said.

"Furious even." F/n's mom added.

"That's what I was thinking?" Mikasa said.

"F/n how's your and Levi's girlfriend's relationship?" Her mom asked. 

F/n didn't answer, so her mom called her name out again. F/n looked up, "Oh, ugh...It's cool. I don't think she'd get mad or anything." Then F/n went back to looking at her plate. Yeah, she was upset. I really hope she isn't regretting telling me. If she is it just means I should break up with Petra all the more faster. I'll do it tomorrow for sure. 

My mom cleared her throat, "Why did you even get a girlfriend, Levi? We all know how you feel about F/n-" 

"Can you all drop it." I snapped at them. The more they talked, the more they were upsetting F/n. How could they not see that? 

"F/n are you okay?" Her mom asked her. 

F/n stood up, "Yeah, I just gotta go to the bathroom real quick." Then she left. 

I looked at the three of them, "This is your fault." 

"Tsk, we didn't do anything," Mikasa said. 

My mom crossed her arms, "I agree you're the one who's kept your feelings to yourself so long." 

I rolled my eyes, "You all don't know when to shut up," I got up putting some money down to pay for dinner, then I went to follow F/n. 

I waited outside the bathroom only to see her walking out wiping her face, "Were you crying?" I asked her.

F/n jumped at my voice, "Levi?" Then she shook her head, "No I wasn't crying, I was just washing my face, ugh...I was tired." 

"You don't have to lie," I told her.

F/n hung her head, "I didn't think about Petra...I sorta feel really guilty." 

"You wanna head out?...I'm not really that hungry." 

F/n looked back at me, "Yeah that sounds good." 

~Later~

The ride back home was fine. We didn't say much to each other, and that was killing me, but I could see why F/n didn't want to say anything. She was upset about me still being with Petra. I guess that was justified. But I still wish we could talk about it. I just couldn't figure anything out right now. I want us to go back to how we were, but I want to be her boyfriend. I want to kiss her. But I want to know how she feels about this too, but she won't say anything. And I don't know how to start this conversation without scaring her. 

Damn it; I should have just talked to her about it when she first confessed. Then we wouldn't have gone to dinner only to get them to make her angry.

I pulled up to our house. 

F/n started to get out, but I stopped her, "We need to talk F/n." 

F/n hesitated for a moment but she didn't look at me, "Levi...Can we do this later?" 

"No." 

"Why not?" She turned to look at me.

"I think we've waited long enough if you ask me. I want to be with you," I told her.

F/n looked away, "You can't say things like that. You have a girlfriend." 

"Who I'm breaking up with tomorrow." 

F/n's eyes went wide, "Why would you do that?" 

"Because I want to be with you, idiot." 

F/n rubbed her face, "Levi I can't let you do that. It would be wrong; she would know you broke up with her to be with me...Hell anyone would know that. I can't live with that guilt." 

"F/n," I started to say, but she put her hand up. 

"Don't." 

"F/n," I called again.

But she had already got out and was walking to her house. 

Shit. I should have never started dating F/n.

I'm such an idiot.

Your Pov

Levi is such an idiot.

Hell, I'm an idiot.

How the hell did I forget about Petra when I told him I loved him? I was all caught up in my own feelings I didn't think about anyone else's. He dating her! How would she feel if he just left her for me? And after I told her multiple times that I didn't have any feelings for him. That would be so wrong, no matter how much I wanted him.

And Levi, what was wrong with him? He was willing to just go for it! Didn't he know that would break her heart? Did he even care? They've pretty much been going out since the school year started and now it's October Shouldn't he be more attached to her? Or maybe he never was? I mean he did tell me how he felt about me and he was still dating...

I got out of my shower and walked to my room. I could hear no one was home yet. I guess mom and them haven't go back yet. It sucked how I left, but that was kind of a lot they through on me with that Petra. I just felt so bad. I shouldn't have lied to her about my feelings for Levi. Hell, I shouldn't have lied to anyone about how I felt about Levi, not even him.

It would have been so much simpler if I had just said something, back when I first realized I loved him. I only never told him because I didn't think he'd feel the same way and I didn't want to make it awkward, which is not working. Like we both know how we feel about each other, but it's somehow worst. Like what the fuck are we supposed to do now? He has to stay with Petra for now, and I have to just watch them together knowing that he wants to be with me?

Ugh, I groaned. Why is everything so fucking complicated?

Just then my phone started to buzz; I looked at it, it was Levi of course.

-Come to your window.

I quickly put a shirt on and some shorts and went to my window, opening it to see Levi sitting at his own window.

"What is it, Levi?" I snapped at him. I wasn't really mad at him, but I was aggravated; I just wanted time to think to myself. 

"Look, I'm sorry." He said.

I snorted, "What are you sorry for?" 

"I should have said something earlier. We wouldn't be in this mess if I had just manned up and said how I felt about you a long time ago," Levi told me.

I hugged my head, "If that's the case then I should be sorry too." 

We both didn't say anything. 

"Can I come over?" Levi asked. 

I nodded moving away from the window and sitting down on my bed. Levi came in and sat beside me. I leaned my head on his shoulder.

"We can't go back to how we used to be can we?" I asked him.

"I don't think so, " He answered.

"I was afraid of that." 

"And you won't let me Break up with Petra," Levi said.

"Because it would be wrong Levi, you know that." I told him, "Do you know how many times I've told her I didn't have feelings for you. Then to just take her part in the play and then her boyfriend. Our moms are right she'd be furious." 

"What do you care?" Levi asked. "And you didn't take her part; she was just the understudy. It wasn't her part, to begin with." 

"You get what I'm saying thought Levi," I said laying back on my bed. Levi moved to lay beside me, and we both just stared at each other. 

It was sot weird now; knowing he feels the same way about me when I look at him. And he's always felt this way? It's insane! But why did it have to be this way now? "Levi, when did you realize you loved me?" I asked him. I had to know. 

"It was a little before we had our first kiss," He answered. "So when we were about ten or eleven I don't know." 

"No," I started to laugh, "You were nine, and I was eight." 

"I feel like we were older than that." He said.

"I'm pretty sure I'd remember my first kiss," I told him.

"I'm pretty sure I'd remember when I decided you were the love of my life," Levi said.

I stopped laughing. How could Levi say something like that and be so serious? "When did you first realize how you felt about me?" 

"I guess it was a few days after the kiss...Remeber when I was avoiding you. It was cause I didn't know what to do...Or how I felt." I answered him.

"Tch, Sounds like a pretty eleven-year-old thing to think about if you ask me." He said looking away.

I playfully hit his arm, "Okay maybe we were older." 

"Weren't smart enough though." He added.

"Yeah, if we were we wouldn't be in this mess. I never said anything to you because I didn't think you felt the same way. Why did you even start dating Petra? What made you not tell me how you felt?" 

Levi didn't say anything for a moment, but then he looked at me. "Pretty much the same reason, I just didn't want to lose you...And then you started dating that shit head, and she was there, and I didn't want to be alone. Stupid reason really. Why'd you start dating him?" 

I looked away, now that I think about it. It's all kind his fault. But I won't say that out loud. "I only started to date him cause I was mad at you for being with Petra, and I didn't want to be alone." 

Levi didn't say anything, but after a moment she shook his head and laughed a little, "I can't believe I can be an idiot like you sometimes." 

I just smiled at him, "I know right, I thought you were supposed to be the smart one Levi." 

"Tch, your stupid rubbed off on me," He joked. 

I rolled my eyes at him.

This was bittersweet. 

We could be honest with each other, and we felt closer, but this one thing was just keeping us away from each other. 

Just then Levi's phone started to ring, but he didn't move to get it.

"Are you going to check it?" I asked.

"No," He answered.

"Why not?" 

"I don't want to be out of this moment," He said. 

I looked away feeling a bit embarrassed. I've never really seen this side of Levi, and I'll be honest. He's smooth as fuck. I shook my head, I cannot get lost in his sexiness, "Levi answer your phone." I told him.

but by then it had stopped ringing.

"Anyway-" He started, but his phone rung again.

I smiled "just answer it." 

"They can wait. I waited for this moment a long time." He said, taking my hand.

I could feel my heart swelling in my chest with emotions. This was everything I wanted...But I moved my hand, but this was wrong. "Levi, we can't have a moment...not like this...you still belong with someone else." 

Levi stared at me, But his phone buzzed.

"So would you check your damn phone, it could be something important," I told. Then I turned away from him, I was tired, and I want to sleep. As much as I loved laying here with him, I know it's wrong. So I can't do this.

"F/n," Levi spoke up.

"What is it?" I asked not turning to look at him. What more could he say?

"If I broke up with Petra, would you be with my girlfriend?" 

I sighed, "Levi no, don't break up with her for me." 

"Alright, what if she breaks up with me?" 

I turned back to him and sat up, "Levi, do not make her break up with you. Can't you just accept right now isn't a good time for us to be together, We've waited this long, I think we-" 

Levi cut me off by kissing me.

But I pushed him away, even though it just about killed me to do that. 

"Levi stop." 

"Look," He said showing me his phone. 

"What?" I asked.

He dropped it into my hands. I pulled it closer to my face so I could read it. It was from Petra.

-Look I've tried to call you cause I wanted to do this over the phone, but I guess you're busy but the bottom line is I want to break up. Sorry.

My eyes went wide at what I read, and I had to reread it. I looked back up at Levi, "What happened? Why would she break up with you?" 

"Who fucking cares?" Levi said moving to kiss me again. 

I went with it, but again I pushed him away, he was taking this just too well. "Levi, be serious. What happened?" 

Levi ran his hands through his hair, looking back at me, "I don't know, and I don't fucking care. This is what I wanted. This is what you wanted. She broke up with me, So for the first time in forever, it's just you and me. So are you going to be my girlfriend or not F/n?" 

I put my face in my hands; this was insane! Everything was crazy! And It was moving so fast. How is he able to just know what he wants so fast and be so sure?

"God damn it F/n, just give me an answer," He snapped.

I looked at him, "Who's the idiot now, what do you think my answer is?"

Levi smiled then reached over for me again kissing me.

And I didn't stop him this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Took them long enough right? But reader and Levi are together now, so yay. And who knows maybe there might some "fun" stuff in the next chapter who knows?? (lol I know) *winks
> 
> Anyways thanks for reading hope you enjoyed the chapter!!
> 
> Pretty please leave kudos or/and comments!! 
> 
> It is my favorite part of the day to see what you all have to say about this story, Like no lie. Also, I might not replay to everyone, but I do take the time out to read and reread every single one and they all make me smile, so thank you a million for leaving your thoughts 
> 
> Ps, A fun fact sometimes the things you guys say gives me ideas on what I should add to the story ;)
> 
> love you guys 
> 
> xoxo


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, new chapter! and guess what? 
> 
> There's Smut! 
> 
> (haha that rhymes anyways enjoy the chapter!!)

Levi Pov

I opened my eyes to see F/n still asleep beside me.

I smiled.

She is so beautiful. And she's finally mine. 

I moved over so I could kiss her on her neck. God, this was so right. I could kiss F/n and hold her whenever I wanted to, and nothing could stop me. I smiled moving my kisses to her shoulder. This was everything I wanted. I could lay here forever with her. 

"Levi," F/n said sturring in her sleep. 

"Hmm?" 

"What time is it?" 

"Don't know," I told her not stopping from leaving kisses all over her

"I bet it's too earlier for you to be waking me up with kisses I'm sure," She said turning on her back to looking at me.

I just stared at her, half of me couldn't believe I could finally hold her like this, the other half was the happiest I've been in a long time. So I was going to take advantage of every second I have with her. I moved, so I was hovering over her, "I've waited too long to be able to do this, so you're just going to have to deal." Then I leaned in to kiss her on her lips again. I would never get tired of this. 

F/n started laughing, "Levi, I had no idea you were so smooth. It's weird." 

I groaned getting off her and sitting up, "Tch, what are you talking about?" 

F/n sat up, "They way you've been talking, I'm just not used to hearing you-or see you act like this. It's strange...But that's not to say I don't like it." She started to mover her hair out of her face, "Seriously what time is it? When did we finally fall asleep?

I rolled my eyes at her, "Tch, I'm not acting different." 

"Okay, that's it." F/n said with some seriousness in her voice, "I've been ignoring you clicking your tongue for a while now, but if we're going to keep dating you need to stop it." 

"So you'll break up with me if I keep clicking my tongue?" I asked her with a sly smiled forming on my face.

F/n smiled back, "Yes. I will." 

I reached over and kissed her again; I slowly kissed her next to her ear, "Tch, I won't let you." 

F/n laughed, "So you're just going to do it right in my ear?" 

"Mmhmm," I hummed in her ear. 

F/n laid back down on her on her back. I moved, so I was over her again, but before I could kiss her again, F/n stopped and held my face between her hands, "This is so unbelievable." 

"I know right?" 

"Like I just never thought...This-us, I just didn't think this could ever happen." 

"I know what you mean," I told her. "So why don't you shut up and let me kiss you for missed time?" I said retaking her lips.

F/n pulled my hair holding me close to her as I kissed her. I had one of my hands moving down to hold her waist so I could pull her closer, but before I knew it, she had turned us both over so she was on top of me. We broke apart breathing heavy, I knew F/n was sexy but Goddamnit, her on top of me like this. Shit, I wanted her. F/n looked down at me biting her lip, and I think I could just about die. I felt myself getting harder by the second. For F/n to look at me like this; it was fucking everything. I grabbed her ass I wanted to pull her close. I noticed she jumped a little when I did; then I saw her swallow, she was nervous. 

Shit, I forgot. 

F/n's still a virgin, this is all still pretty new to her. I loosened my grip I had on her, If we were going to do this now I needed to be gentle. "Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you," I told her.

"What?-oh Levi no. It's fine." She said in a small voice. I could tell she was trying to put up a front, but she was nervous. 

I sat up, and kissed her softly, "It's fine, we can go slow." 

F/n didn't say anything. She just went with it. It was fine. I didn't mind leading; I wanted her first time to be something she could remember. So I decided just to move slow, but I could tell she wanted to speed it up by the way she was grinding on me. It was taking all my self-control to keep this pace as it was, but for her, I would do whatever I could do to make this perfect. 

"Levi, please." She said in a hushed breath in my ear as I kissed and left marks down her neck. I wanted everyone to know she belonged to someone when they say her. I wanted them to know she was mine. 

"Levi," She moaned my name again. 

"Shit," I breathed out. That was the sexiest thing I ever heard in my life. 

F/n started to pull my shirt off, and I went with it. Then she started to take her shirt off, and I quickly saw she wasn't wearing a bra. 

I took in a breath. 

F/n bit her lip, "Who's nervous now?" She teased. 

F/n pressed her body against mine, and I swear I almost came right there, she was driving me crazy.

"F/n your dad will be here in a few, he- Oh wow," F/n's mom busted in the room out of nowhere. 

"Shit!" 

"Fuck!" 

F/n and I both yelled, shocked that she walked in the room. I tried to help by covering F/n up, but somehow F/n actually fell off the bed. 

"Mom get out!" She yelled. 

Her mother looked just ask panicked as we were. "Ahh- Sorry!" Then she shut the door. 

"Omgomgomgomg," F/n groaned while still sitting on her floor. "My mom literally just saw us about to have sex. Omgomgomg." 

I didn't know what to say, it was true. It was embarrassing. I recently wasn't thinking about her walking in. Shit. F/n was probably dying. I mean I was embarrassed about it too, but I wasn't the one with my boobs out. I scratched the back of my head. I saw her shirt laying on her bed, and passed it to her, "Here." 

F/n looked back at me; then she took it. "Thanks." 

I couldn't look at her, "No problem." 

I heard her sigh loudly, "This is so fucking embarrassing." 

"Deffently in my top 3," I tried to joke.

F/n went silent for a moment, neither of us saying anything. We were just letting what happened to sink in. If her mom didn't come in just now, I think we would have actually started to have sex...

"Levi?" F/n called my name; I looked over to see she hadn't put the shirt on. I snapped my head away from her. 

She snorted a laugh. 

I groaned, "What the hell F/n?"

"You're so cute Levi," I felt her kiss me on the cheek. 

I clicked my tongue. 

It was still weird to see her like that. Not to say she was weird. It was still strange now. Especially with her mom just walking in. 

F/n sat back down on her bed sitting in front of me. She was smiling, "Er, let's pretend that didn't happen, okay?

"No way," I told her, "I'm going to remember that very clearly for a long time. You fell off the bed." 

F/n rolled her eyes, "You're cute but still annoying." 

I smirked at her, "How's it feel to be able to tell me how cute I am?" 

F/n looked away, "You are so full of yourself." 

"I guess I should get back home." 

F/n looked back at me, "Yeah, you know my mom probably already told yours." 

I was standing up and stretching, "Yeah, they're going to talk about this forever." 

"Just what we needed," She snorted. 

I started to walk to her window to go back to my room, "You're coming to the show tonight right?" 

"Well, I did actually want to see it, and not be in it, so yeah," She smiled back following me to the window. 

"I'll take you when I go then," 

"Sounds like a plan." 

I started to leave, but I stopped, "Don't I get a kiss?" 

"Tch, sure I guess," She smiled leaning in to kiss me.

"Who's making the annoying sounds now?" I teased her.

"Go home Levi," She said walking away. 

"F/n?" I called her again

F/n raised her eyebrow, "Yeah?" 

"I love you," I told her.

F/n bit her lip and rolled her eyes, "I love you too." 

Your Pov

I smiled to myself as I was getting my stuff to go into the bathroom.

For the first time in my life, everything felt perfect. 

Levi was mine.

And I was his. 

I was cheesing so wide! This was amazing! This was everything I everything wanted for as long as I could remember. Levi and I were now in a real relationship! It was like the universe liked me! This was the best I felt in forever, Ugh! And kissing him? He's amazing! Levi showing me his sweet side? God, I think I only feel deeper in love with him! 

I wish we could just stay together in the bed just all day, And the way he held me! like-I had no idea, Levi was filled with so much passion! It's insane.

I walked out of my room to go to the bathroom only to see my mom standing out by her door. Shit.

I forgot about that. 

I groaned to myself, Why couldn't she knock? 

My mom and I stared at each other for a moment.

"We going to talk about?" She asked me.

"Nope," I shook my head and started walking to the bathroom. I did not want to do this. 

"F/n," My mom said in a warning tone.

I stopped and looked back at her. I really didn't want to have this conversation. I know she's just going to tease me or something. And I don't want to deal with that right now. Or ever, I mean she saw my boobs I'm sure. It was humiliating! /p>

My mom sighed, "At least tell me you had protection?" 

My eyes went wide, "Huh? What? No, we didn't-" I stuttered.

"F/n you were topless I'm not an idiot." My mom said plainly.

"Yeah, but we hadn't got to that...we weren't gonna..." I trailed off. 

"Yeah, sure those hickies on your neck meant he was about to stop." I grabbed my neck at her comment. Damn Levi! I knew I should have told him to stop. My mother sighed again, "I get it you're eighteen, things like this will happen just don't be reckless. I don't want either one of you messing up anything for your future because of decisions you decided to make now." 

I nodded, this was a strange conversation. "Yeah, mom will be...For sure." 

My mom smiled, "Good, I'm glad the two of you decided to stop being stupid." She said going into her room, but not before stopping and looking at me, "And F/?" 

"Huh?" 

"Lock the door." Then my mom walked out. 

I rolled my eyes, I mean she's not wrong though. I shook my head; I just need to get ready for the day.

~~Later~~

Levi Pov

I sat there in the kitchen while Mikasa sat beside me laughing in my face. 

"I can't believe (mom's name) saw you two together," She said, "How lame can the two of you get?" 

I pinched the bridge of my nose, "Don't you have anything better to do?" 

Mikasa leaned back in her chair, "Yeah, but this is funny." 

"Mikasa," My mom said in a warning tone.

Mikasa raised her eyebrow, "What up?" 

"Give Levi and me a sec," My mom told her.

Mikasa rolled her eyes, "Fine, fine." Then she got up and walked out leaving my mom and me alone.

(Mom's name) Had already talked to my mom, so now that my mom was already back from work she wanted to talk to me. I really didn't need this. I know all she's going to do is tease me like Mikasa, and I don't need that from my own mother. Not right now.

"So you and F/n?" She asked.

"Tch, can we skip the small talk about this, and get to the point," I asked her. 

My mom chuckled, "Fine. You already know you need to stay protected right? Do you have condoms? Is she on birth control? Are you both comfortable? Are you making sure you're being a gentleman?" 

I just looked at my mom, I was fucking eighteen years old, and now she wanted to have this conversation? "Tch, I know what I'm doing." 

My mom laughed.

"Seriously?" How could she laugh? 

"At least answer if you're staying protected?" 

I rolled my eyes, "We haven't done anything, but I will make sure we are when we do." 

My mom smiled. 

I rolled my eyes again; this was so fucking uncomfortable.

"Here," My mom said pulling out a box of condoms from her purse. She couldn't be serious?

"Mom-" 

"And here." She said putting a key down on the table.

I looked at the key and back at her, "What is this?" 

"A hotel room for the two of you tonight," my mom answered me.

She could not be serious.

"I'm not taking this." it was weird enough that they knew what we were doing, I didn't need them knowing when and where. And besides, I know we can't afford something like this. "Tch, get a refund," I told her. 

"Don't flatter yourself; this is more for F/n then it is for you." My mom said rolling her eyes, "It's her first time, isn't it? Her mom told me. You guys are going to do it eventually. Why not make it a nice night?" 

"Seriously mom?" 

"Ha!" I heard Mikasa laugh from the next room.

I groaned. This was beyond annoying.

"Don't worry when I talked to Mikasa about her first time I did the same thing for her," My mom smiled. 

"Mom!" I heard Mikasa shout.

Ha, severs her right. 

I looked back at the key, "How'd you afford this?" 

"Why don't you let me worry about that, and you just focus making sure F/n has a good night?" My mom said.

"Tch, fine," I said picking up the keys. 

"And here," My mom said taking my hand and putting some money in it.

"Mom," I warned her. This was becoming too much. It was hard enough that she was working crazy hours she doesn't need to spend money on me. Especially when she won't even let me get a job. 

"Have a good night tonight okay." She smiled, then she walked out of the kitchen. I heard her start yelling at Mikasa, but I really wasn't paying attention by then.

So both our moms know we want to have sex? I thought. They're so fucking weird. Who does this? I felt the key in my pocket. The idea was 

nice, but it didn't make it strange as fuck, they'd know what we were doing. Gross.

I walked back to my room to see F/n sitting on her window.

I walked up to mine, "How was hanging out with your dad today?" 

She rolled her eyes, "We were out for like five minutes then he said something came up and brought me back." 

"Oh." 

"So what are you up to know? When are you heading to the college?" She asked me. 

"I was actually getting ready to go, I was only waiting for my mom to come home before I left." 

"Well, I'll get my shoes," she said getting up.

"Ugh, F/n?" I called out to her.

"Hmm?" 

"Er, pack some clothes for tomorrow too okay." 

"For what?" She asked.

"Tch, just do it. I'll be waiting in the car." Then I got up and left.

I can't believe I was going this. 

Maybe we wouldn't do anything. It could just be a nice date sorta sleepover thing. We don't have to have sex. But if we were too, I mean my mom did make a good point. I want this to be something F/n enjoys...

It might not be so bad.

Your Pov

Levi was being strange tonight. 

He wouldn't tell me why he told me to pack some clothes. I hope he isn't planning to do anything stupid, like break into a pool or something. I laughed to myself, then again that was all me. I shook my head, all because I wouldn't tell Levi how I felt. Because I was scared, he didn't feel the same way. 

Geez, I'm such an Idiot.

I said in the audience, it was about an hour till showtime, and since I wasn't helping them out tonight, I was just going to watch Levi. I mean I always do this. Whenever he has a show I got to all the showings, it's just what I think a good friend should do. I'm being supportive. 

Although I have noticed I haven't seen Petra...

Not that I really wanted, or didn't want to. I mean if anything I kinda do wanna see her. I want to ask her why she broke up with Levi like that last night. He might not find it a big deal, but I kinda do. So, I need to get the info on what happened. Not only that, I don't really want to get on the stage again, it was all kinda of stressful.

"Petra! you're here!" I heard one of the girls yell. I sighed in relief, that means they didn't need me. 

Petra walked in smiling but in her eyes, she looked tired. Maybe something was really wrong with her?

"Hey, Petra," I said to her right before she passed me.

Petra stopped and looked at me, "Oh, hey F/n." 

I held my arm feeling a little nervous now. I just realized looking at her; I'm dating Levi now...And they literally just broke up. I probably shouldn't mention that. "How are you feeling?" 

Petra just shrugged, "I"m fine." 

"Oh," I said. 

It was something wrong. I couldn't put my finger on it, but I just felt like something was up with her.

Petra scratched her face looking away, "Um...I heard you took me and Delilah's place last night." 

I sucked in a breath; my mom did say she would be mad about that. "Ugh, yeah. I hope that was okay..." I said not making eye contact.

"Oh, that's fine." She said with a little laugh in her voice, "We needed someone...I'm just glad it wasn't a disater...or at least, so I heard." 

I mustered up a laugh, "Yeah, I didn't fall off the stage, so I guess it was okay." 

Petra laughed, but then it trailed off, "I heard you-Um, you did really good with Levi...You guys have lots of chemistry." 

Oh, God. Who told her that? "It was no big deal," I told her trying to play it down.

Petra tilted her heard, "F/n." She said in this sing-song voice. 

"What?" I asked frowning; I have no idea where this conversation is going. It's so awkward. I can only imagine how her and Levi's conversation will go. 

She smiled looking away, "I don't know if Levi told you or not, but I sorta broke up with him last night." 

"No way? Why?" I asked trying to sound shocked.

Petra didn't seem like she believed it but still ignored it, "There's just a lot I have going on right now, with school and picking a college...and stuff a boyfriend just doesn't add well in the mix..." She told me.

I guess I could see that. But why would anyone break up with Levi for reasons like that was still a little beyond me? He's just so good as just a person. 

"Not to mention it's even more of a drag since he wasn't even in love with me...Or even liked me that much," she said.

I looked back at her, "Petra I told you Levi wouldn't have started dating you if he didn't like you." 

"I know, I know. But I know he really likes you...Even if he won't say it," She started to say. "You guys just belong together..." 

I guess she was right about that. I love how everyone else knew it, but Levi and I just refused to believe it. Honestly, we could have been together a long time ago. But that didn't make it right. From what I could tell Levi had only been using her as a placeholder for me; because he didn't want to be alone. And that was honestly wrong, and it just made me feel bad, knowing that now that they are apart he's with me. And from what I can tell, she really liked him too.

"I'm sorry Petra," I told her not knowing what else to say. "That you and Levi didn't work out..." 

Petra huffed out a laugh, "Yeah, But I guess that's life sometimes...You should talk to Levi, that-" 

"Petra hurry up and get ready!" Someone yelled at her from the stage.

"Shit," She snapped, "I got so caught up there." Petra looked back at me while she started to walk away, "Let's hang out later okay? I have to go. Hopefully I'm not a disaster." 

I smiled back at her, "If I did okay, you'll do great." She just smiled back at me warmly heading to the back. 

I sat back down sighing. 

Petra sure was something else. 

I don't know what I expected. I mean, I wasn't always a big fan of her, but she's never done anything bad to me. In reality, she's really sweet. I think the only reason I didn't care for her for so long was that I knew she was crushing on Levi...That was the only thing, and that's not a real reason to not like someone. I bet in the right situation we could actually be friends...Who knows. 

I think she even sorta gave me permission to be with Levi...I mean she told me I should talk to him, that must mean the same thing. So hopefully if she saw Levi and me together, she wouldn't get mad. 

I still feel sorta bad though. 

~~Later~~

The play was great. 

In my opinion much better then what I did last night. 

Levi was mesmerizing to watch, and Petra did pretty well too. 

I was proud; I think the play was really good with them as the leads. Levi needed to work with someone who knew the material better, and if you asked me, it showed here. The only part that I thought was a bit strange was that one song with their first kiss...I did kinda have to look away. I don't know why but I just felt a little jealous...Levi is mine now. I don't want to see him kissing anyone else, play or not. 

I laughed at myself, Levi was mine...God, that is such a nice thing to be able to say...

"What are you laughing about brat?" 

I turned to see Levi walking up to me he had all his things ready to leave. 

I smiled at him, "Nothing." 

"Tch, liar." 

I rolled my eyes at him, "I don't see why you find the need to call me a liar." 

"I don't see why you find the need to lie." He said walking out.

I followed him to his car. He didn't say anything else. I sighed, "If you must know, I was just enjoying the fact that I can call you mine." 

Levi didn't say anything. But I did catch the little smile that was on his face. God, he is so cute.

Levi started to drive, but it wasn't the way home, I remembered the clothes Levi told me to pack before I left home. "Where are you taking us anyway?" I asked him.

"Out," He said.

"I figured that where is what I want to know." 

"You'll see." Was his only answer. 

I just cut my eyes at him. He was up to something but I just didn't know what.

"You did really good tonight," I told him after a while. 

"You think?" He asked glancing at me, "I liked last night better."

"Gee, I wonder why," I said sarcastically. I cleared my throat, "But that reminds me. Did you-um talk to Petra about why she broke up with you?' 

Levi just shrugged, "She just said she didn't have time for a boyfriend." 

So pretty much the same answer she gave me. I guess Petra is really focussing on the future. Good, for her.

"She also mentioned how exhausting it was dating me, and knowing I was in love with someone else," He added giving me a quick look.

I bit my lip trying to hold back a smile looking out the window.

"It's crazy how everyone but us knew how we felt about each other," Levi said.

I snorted, "I know we said it before, but honestly we are both big idiots." 

"Yeah, think about all the time we could have been together," Levi said. 

I just shook my head. Yup, we were idiot.

After a while of driving Levi finally pulled up to this hotel. It was a nice hotel...Wait why were we here? I looked at Levi once he had parked, "What are we doing here?" 

Levi didn't answer for a moment, but then he looked at me, and I noticed the pink dust under his cheeks, "Spending the night...If that's okay with you?" 

I couldn't help but smile, but I tried to hold it back, "You bought us a hotel?" 

"Tch, more like my mom bought us a-"

"Your mom bought us a hotel!" I yelled. 

Levi groaned, "I knew this was a bad idea." 

I started to laugh, "No, it's not-It's weird, but when I think about it, it's such a Kuchel thing to do, I wouldn't be surprised if my mom helped out with this." 

"You're not upset?" He asked.

I shook my head, "No." 

"You know they did this because they know, we want to have sex...We don't have to F/n you know that?" Levi asked with the blush never leaving his face. Jesus when did Levi get so fucking cute?

I rolled my eyes, "It's fine, and I know we don't have too. If anything it's their fault for thinking we would come here just to screw around." 

Levi laughed a little, "We, we could just play video games on a fancy bed all night." 

"Exactly," I said. 

We both laughed.

"So you wanna do this?" Levi asked.

I remember when I was with Erwin I was always scared of the idea of having sex with him, but with Levi there is none. If anything I want to do it with Levi. And as weird as it was we had a moment now alone. And it looks like we might just do it...

I smiled at Levi, "Yeah, I do." 

Levi Pov

F/n and I were both stood in the room. 

I groaned to myself, this was a bad idea, I don't know why I thought this would be a good idea. Anyone who saw us knew we were coming up here to have sex. That had to be so fucking embarrassing to F/n. And I didn't want her thinking we had to do this. I wanted her to be comfortable and enjoy it. But this-this is way too much. We would have been better just doing it at home when our parents were out or something. I mean I managed to have sex with Petra at home, why did F/n have to be different?. 

But that's just it. She is F/n. She deserves the world.

But I didn't want to scare her either. We can just chill her tonight. I'm not going to have sex with her here. it would just be too much. "F/n, look-" 

But before I could finish F/n walked off and jumped on the bed laying down on her back, "Come on Levi," 

"What?" Was she serious? This is how she wanted to do this?

F/n laughed, "Come over here, and pass the remote, I'm sure they have some good movies on." 

I should have known. "Tch," I looked away from her, "Brat." 

F/n laughed harder, "You are way too adorable Levi." 

"Tch, whatever." I said getting the remote and laying down next to her and turning on the tv for us to find a movie. 

I guess I can't be mad, this is better then having sex right now, At least to me it wouldn't feel right knowing that was the only reason we were here. I honestly didn't care about it that much, I just like being able to spend this time around her.

~~later

We watched at least two movies, I had even ordered a pizza. We were just having fun. 

Right now F/n was in the bathroom taking a shower she said she was tired. So was I, but I was going to go in after her. We may be dating now, but seeing her neaked was still...werid. I mean I just didn't know how I felt about it yet.

After a while I heard F/n walk out the bathroom, "Bathrooms free," I heard her say.

I hummed in responds, I was honesly really tired, but I sat up. Only for my eyes to open wide seeing what she was wearing.

It wasn't anything fancy, but it was still hot as fuck. She had these (color) shorts with this long sleeve (same color) button up shirt, and it fitted her so well. Her hair was a mess, she looked like she was ready to go to sleep, but fuck, Knowing I was going to sleep next to her was doing something to me. 

So I just stared. I didn't where to start, telling her how much I loved her. 

"F/n-" 

But before I could finish saying anything, F/n skipped over and got on the bed and started jumping.

I sat there for a moment, I can't say I was expecting that. 

"F/n?"

"Come on Levi!" She said jumping. "This bed is so great." 

"Tch, stop it. Or you'll fall." I told her. Why was she jumping on the bed? This is such a F/n thing to do. I almost wanted to laugh, why was she so fucking werid. We almost had a moment, then she turns to do something stupid like this.

"No way, when was the last time we jumped on our bed? This is the perfect chance. Now get up here Levi." She laughed.

"I'm not jumping on the bed," I told her getting up.

F/n stopped and sat up on her knees and stared at me trying to make her eyes look big and sad.

"I'm not jumping," I told her, I was about to walk away but F/n pulled me back.

F/n pouted, "What if I kissed you? Would you jump then?" 

"No," I told her.

"Meanie." 

"You could just kiss me," I told her.

"You could just jump on the bed." She responed. 

"You're really beautiful," I told her. I just had to let her know again, and standing here looking in her eyes, complled me to do it.

F/n just stared at me. It was like she was thinking about something. What? I didn't know, But I knew standing next to her like this I wanted to kiss her. I wanted to pull her close. I wanted to take these clothes off her, but I wouldn't do that..not now.

I was about to walk away, but F/n stopped me and pulled me back, and this time she kissed me. 

Your Pov

I don't know what I was doing. 

I mean I know what I was doing, but I just couldn't believe I was doing this now. I had pulled Levi in for a kiss after he had just stared at me for like forever, If anything this was his fault, for being so damn sexy. 

Levi was hovering over me kissing me so intesly, I don't even rememeber if we were stopping for air, it was just like we were attacking each other. Levi moved down to my neck where he discovered I was senative in one spot, making me moan.

God, I wanted to die, It came out of no where. But that seemed to only enocrogae him. He just kept going for it until I pulled myself away from him. Levi stared into my eyes, It was like they were burning with passion I couldn't believe he was looking at me like this. 

"Levi," I huffed out his name, I didn't even realize I was so out of breath.

"Shit," Levi cursed looking back at me. God, did I want him. Hearing his voice sound so deep like that just then just made me want him more. 

I slowly started to unbutton my shirt. I wanted Levi. I wanted to just get this over with already the heat that was froaming inbetween my legs just kept growing.

But Levi stopped my hands, "F/n." He said not losing eye contact with me, "We don't have to." 

I smiled at him, "I want to Levi..." 

Levi looked at me, like he was waiting for me to change my mind but when I didn't he went back to kissing me. While he didn I kept undoing my shirt until my breat were exposed and I felt myself pressed against his chest. Levi still had his own shit on. 

But I guess when Levi felt me against him he pulled back again this time looking over my body. Before I could say anything He moved back and this time put on of my brest in his mouth. 

"Oh, God." I gasped, throwing my head back. I wasn't ready for that jualt that went through my body. 

Levi only bit my nipple down harder. I was squarming under him. I didn't know what to do my hands were gripping his hair wanted him to be closer. while I just trying to pluse my legs together to get some friction. Levi just moved from one breat to the other, driving me futher and further insane.

Levi pulled away but only to take his shirt off, when he came back down he started to kiss me on my lips again, but all the while I felt his hand moving down and under my panties. I felt two of Levi's fingures brushed across my pussy. 

I jerked again, using one of my hands to grab the sheets. Just the sensation of it was driving me crazy. I felt Levi's fingers on inside me, rubbing me, giving me that friction I needed so bad.

"Levi," I said his name again grabbing the arm of his hand that was fingering me. It was just so much. 

Levi pulled away again and moving his hand. I instantly missed him.

"If you thought that was good, you haven't seen anything yet." 

Before I knew it Levi was pulling off my shorts alonf with my underwear. Before I could protest about his own pants being on Levi laied back down but this time he put his head between my legs while. 

"Levi what are you Do-" But I yelpped out in plssure as I felt his tounge lick me down there. 

I pratically sat up pulling his hair. I deffently wasn't preparid for that. 

But that didn't stop Levi, I think whenever I made any sound made him just go at me harder. And now he just had be a whining mess. 

"You're so fucking wet," Levi said coming up for a breath, and putting his fingures back inside me. Shit, why was he so good at this?

"Levi please...I need more," I begged him. 

Levi backed up, he was breathing just as heavy as I was. "Fine," Was all he said. The Levi started to unzip his pants. 

I took in a shap breath. We were actully doing this.

Levi Pov

I looked down at F/n as I put the condom on. 

F/n just stared at me. 

We were both nerovus, but we were actually about to do this. I moved above her never breaking eye contact, "Are you sure?" I asked her.

She nodded her head. Maybe she was scared I'd be made if she said no.

"F/n, we don't have to this if you don't want to, we can go back to watching-"

"Would you shut up and fuck me already Levi." F/n breathed out, then pulling my face to hers to kiss again. I groaned feeling my dick press up against her. 

I pulled away again, "Fine, tell me when it hurts." 

F/n nodded. 

I looked back at her, this was it. 

I started to aline myself with her, perposely taking longer then I needed. I wanted her to be as wet as she could be, the less painful for her the better. Then while looking at her I started to push myself in her. F/n gasped once my head was in and I stopped.

I let her get adjusted for a sec, then she started to nod her head, "You can keep going." 

I nodded back, and started moving slowly again. 

"Just fucking do it Levi," She huffed out. 

"F/n." I tied to talk to her.

"Just do i-" 

I made one quick thrust and I was all inside her.F/n gasped out again. I didn't move while I wanted for her to get used to me. 

It took a minute, but she tapped me, telling me she wanted me to move. I slowly started to slid out only leaving the tip in, then I moved back in. F/n whined and moaned as I started to speed up. I was close but I didn't want to come, I wanted her to come. I wanted F/n to know I could make her feel good. I wanted her to know I was the only one who could make her feel like this.

I moved in and out of her keeping a steady pace, after a while I moved F/n legs higher, so I could get her spot better, I was close and I needed her get off first. So I needed to his where I knew she would come. 

"Fuck, Levi!" She screamed out. 

I smiled to myself, yeah now I was getting her right.

"Levi-Levi," She called my name making me go harder. "I think-I-I'm gonna-"The more she stuttered the closer I felt I was. 

F/n started to jerk, throwing her head back and screaming my name. nails digging into my skin. Shit. And Just as she did, felt myself coming too. 

Once we both came we laied there for a moment trying to catah our breath. I rolled off her laying on my back. I looked back at her and saw she was staring at me. 

I didn't know what to say. 

But F/n smiled, then she started to laugh, "We totally just did it." 

I closed my eyes, why was she such a fucking idiot?

I just moved over to kiss her on her lips, "I love you Idiot."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter!! 
> 
> Before I get into notes happy earlier birthday too Tamara!! You are amazing, you been on the journey with me reading a few of my stories and your comments are always encouraging so thank you! And I hope you have a great birthday!!!
> 
> Finally right? Reader and Levis' done the do talk about a long time coming ~~hehe pun not intended (Or was it???) 
> 
> Anyways drop a comment telling me if you liked this chapter or not, if you're familiar with my other stories you'll know smut isn't really a strong point for me in writing so tell me how I did, be honest if it was bad I can handle it, just let me know what I need to work on I just want to grow as a writer. 
> 
> Again hope you guys liked this chapter and can't wait to see all the other fuff reader and Levi gets to enjoy being a couple, until the next chapter
> 
> xoxo


	16. Chapter 16

Your Pov

I am so in love with Levi.

I don't think I've ever been this happy in my life.

He is everything. And I cannot believe Levi, and I did it. Like I hard sex with Levi, it's insane. I didn't think we'd end up doing it last night in the hotel, but I guess one thing lead up to another.

But can I say the way Levi acted the whole time, just made me fall in love with him even more? Like he was just so caring. Ugh, I can't really find the words. It's just seeing him, and feeling the way he was with me last night, just kept showing me, Levi is really in love with me. And knowing that makes me the happiest girl in the world. 

Levi and I were on our way back home now. 

We haven't said much to each other but some random jokes here and there, and that's fine. Levi is a quiet and thoughtful person by nature, so I expect as much. But I am kinda wondering what he's thinking now that we've had sex. I remember yesterday morning he was still too scared to look at my boobs, and last night he- Oh, God this is embarrassing to think about.

"You told Petra I was gay because you didn't want her to date me?" Levi asked out of nowhere.

I didn't turn to look at him; I can't believe he just remembered that. "Maybe..." 

Levi laughed, "You're such a dork." 

I turned and stuck my tongue out at him. But that's when something hit me. "Wait! Levi!" 

"What are you yelling for?" 

"You-You told all the guys not to date me! That was because you liked me!" I half asked half told him.

"Tch, so." He said keeping his eyes on the road.

"Oh my gosh you are such a loser!" I teased him, "You could have just asked me out, you didn't have to ruin my dating life for the last three years...Omg. Wait-What did you do to Reiner?" I asked. I couldn't believe I just realized it. 

"I didn't do anything to him." 

"So Reiner just stood me up for no reason?" 

"Tch, I didn't do anything bad." He said glancing at me.

"Alright, but what did you do?" At this point, I just wanted to know what he did.

"I just threaten him, said I would beat him up or something I really don't remember." He answered me.

That sounds about right. I just don't get why we're all the guys scared of him? Levi isn't that scary, like at all. Yes, when we were in middle school, he got in a few fights especially after his dad left, but I don't think he's ever been so bad to the point that anyone should be afraid of him. But this just made me wonder something else. 

"Why didn't you say anything then?...about liking me." 

"I told you why already-" 

"I know," I cut him off, "I mean, you remember how sad I was he stood me up, why didn't you just say how you felt then." 

"Same reason, I didn't want to screw up our friendship," Levi said. "It was dumb, we both were dumb." 

"I feel like we're going to realize that a lot," I said with a little laugh. Because it was true, so far from what I can tell if we had just been honest with each other, this wouldn't have dragged out for so long.

Levi pulled up to his house. I noticed our mom's car weren't there, but I did see one I didn't recognize. 

"Good thing our moms aren't here," I said to Levi getting out of his car. I walked around to him, wrapping my arms around him and looking up, Levi looked down at me and gave me a quick peck, "That's Yeager's car." 

"Eren?" I asked. 

Levi hummed in responded. 

I looked back over at his car; he must be here for Mikasa. "You wanna go home then? Or you coming over?" I asked him.

Levi pulled away from me and took my hand. "I just want to lay in bed with you all day." He pulled me to my own house; he had a key to my house, so he went right in.

"So much for emergency only," I joked. 

"Tch, it is an emergency. I don't want to be home, and I want to lay with my girlfriend." He said walking to my room.

God, my face was going to hurt from smiling so much because of him, in just the last two days. We go into my room, and Levi took off his shirt and plopped down on my bed.

"You are so lazy, Levi." I teased him while admiring his body. God, he was hot....and he was mine now. 

Levi only groaned, "Lay down with me." 

"You know you got a show tonight right? Even if I wanted to we can't stay in bed all day," I told him.

Levi sat up and looked at me, "Would you just shut up and just let me cuddle with you?" 

"You want to cuddle? I thought you didn't like cuddling? It doesn't seem like a Levi type of thing." I laughed walking up closer to him. Levi moved so I could stand between his legs while he sat on my bed. He didn't say anything he just hugged me and laid his head down on my chest.

"You're different." 

I smiled to myself, God, I just love him. 

I ran my fingers through his hair, " I guess that's a decent answer-Ah-Levi!" 

Before I knew it, Levi had left me up and slammed me down on my bed; he had me wrapped in his arms. Levi then moved his face between my neck giving leaving kisses there. I couldn't help but giggle because that was my soft spot. But also I just still couldn't believe I was seeing this side of Levi. It almost didn't feel real. Is this Levi when he's happy? Was he this way with Petra at all? Or was it just me? Something tells me he's only this way with me, and that just made my heart start to race. 

It's just an amazing feeling when the person you love, loves you back. 

"You talk too much, sleep," Levi said getting comfortable.

I sighed, I don't think I'm getting out of this; not like I wanted to anyway. I just got comfortable in his arms. Laying here now, I guess I was a bit tired. I mean, we did have to leave the hotel by eleven. I could use a little nap. 

Levi and I had our legs and arms tangled in each other; I guess this was how he liked to sleep with me. I stared at him he had his eyes closed, I smiled at him. He must have been really sleepy; I should let him sleep. 

"I can feel you staring at me weirdo," Levi said with his eyes still closed. 

I pouted, averting my eyes, "I wasn't staring, I was going to sleep." 

Levi opened his eyes and smiled at me, and I swear I could have just about died. 

"Tch, I love you, idiot." 

I sighed, "I love you jerk." 

I could just stay like this forever. 

~~Later~~ 

Levi Pov

It was Monday.

And this would be F/n and my first day going to school as an official couple. I didn't actually care, but F/n kept, talking about it. She was saying some nonsense about how would Petra feel, but I've already told her, Petra didn't care. She went as far to tell me that I should ask f/n out, so I doubt she really be that pissed if I showed up to school with her. 

"What do you think Bella would say?" F/n asked when I pulled up to the school. 

"Her and Furlan would say something like about time," I said parking.

"There just about as bad as our moms." F/n said dryly.

We both got out of my car. I walked up to her shaking my head, "Nah, they were just getting tired of our shit." I took her hand. And I felt her tense up. I groaned to myself, why was she so fucking dramatic?

"Levi, why are you being so-so...afecttionate?" She asked me looking at our hands.

Was this a real question. I thought it was obvious..."Because I can." 

F/n sighed, "I know that...but why? I mean it's just weird..." 

"You rather I treat you like you were just my friend again?" 

"No, that's not what I'm saying. It's just ever since we decided to go out-" F/n started to chuckled, "It's weird. And I know it's stupid to say, but I can't get you off of me." 

I pulled on her hand, so he was close enough for me to kiss, I pulled back, "Get used to it, I've waited too damn long to be able to kiss you when I want. And besides, everyone needs to know you're taken now." I said walking away; she didn't pull her hand away or tense up, she just went with it. I glanced at her, to see her reaction, but if anything I could just see her trying to fight back a smiled. 

I smiled to myself; she might try and act like she doesn't like it, but I know she just loved I'm this way with her now. 

Surprisingly F/n and I got to our first class without anyone coming up to us bothering us, but that was short lived as Bella walked in with Furlan following her. 

"Um excuse me, but what is this I've heard that the two of you are walking down the hall holding-holy shit F/n is that a hickie!?" Bella said and cut her self off. She moved closer to F/n and started examing her skin. "That wasn't here a month ago...What have you been up too? Did Levi do that? Are you back with Erwin? Tell me!" 

"I heard you kicked ass at that musical Levi, good job," Furlan said sitting down.

"Don't just tell him good job, Furlan!" Bella yelled at him, "Something is going on!" 

"Tch were dating now Bella," I told her bluntly.

Bella's eyes went wide, "Whaaaat!" 

"Ms, Magnolia would you sit down so I may start class," The teacher said.

Bella turned to him mouth still opened. F/n and I both snorted at her, why was she so shocked about this. Bella just nodded at sat down in her seat, but not before turning to us, "This isn't over!" 

F/n just laughed. 

I watched her; she's so beautiful. 

I don't even think she realizes it, but now that I'm able to be with her how I've always wanted to, I think I've only fallen deeper in love with her. It wasn't even having sex with her either. Something about being able to tell her I was in love with her, made me feel like I was falling more in love with her. I want her in my life forever. I don't see anything ever changing that. 

If I could ask her now, to marry me, I would. But I know we're not ready for that, hell, we just started dating three days ago. But one day it will be the right time. And I'll ask her then. Cause I don't need anyone else. I know that 100% I don't need anyone else, as long as I'm with her.

"Stop staring at me jerk," F/n said nudging me, making me realize I was just staring at her this whole time. I shook my head, I still had school and getting my mom and Mikasa together before I can make that step, but damn it I'll ask her one day.

~~Later

I was standing next to F/n while she was going through her locker for her next class. I was done for the day, but I decided to just hang out with her. 

"So what are we going to do after school today anyway?" She asked closing her locker. 

"No idea," I told her.

"Er wanna go on a date?" F/n asked. 

I looked at F/n, "A date?" 

"I mean- since- Since we've never actually been on a real one...And you're done with the musical-I was just throwing idea's out there, that was stupid, I-"

I kissed her to make her stop stuttering, "Sounds good, what do you want to do?" 

F/n took in a deep breath and looked away from me. "I don't know..." 

"How about the two of you go out with us!" 

F/n and I looked over to see Bella and Furlan approaching us, "You two can go out with Furlan and me tonight, we're going to movies!" 

"Tch, if I wanted to see a movie I'd watch it at home." I told her.

"It sounds kinda nice," F/n mumbled. 

I turned to f/n, "We watch movies all the time together."

"Oh, I didn't think about it that way." She said dumbly. I just rolled my eyes at her; she can be so dumb. I realize she's right about us not going on a real date before, so shouldn't our first date be something nice, and not include Bella and Furlan?

"You know, now that I think about it Bella, I don't think we can hang out with you tonight." F/n said.

"Oh, what are you too good to hang out with us since you're dating now?" Bella teased.

F/n scratched the back of her head looking nervous, "No, I mean...It's not like that. You know I was just thinking this would be our first date. It should just be the two of us." 

Bella started laughing, "I'm just joking with you guys; Although I'm a bit mad, you didn't tell me you were dating. But it's about time." 

"You got that right," Furlan added.

F/n started giggling, "That's just what Levi said you guys would say." 

"Cause he knows you two were exhausting," Furlan said rolling his eyes, "But I'm glad you two are together now." 

Bella went up and grabbed f/n, "You should have heard everyone talking this morning." 

"What was everyone saying-" 

Just then the bell started to ring telling us they needed to get to class. They both turned to us, "You guys coming?" 

"I got something I need to take care of, I'll be back to pick you up from school," I told F/n.

F/n face dropped a little, "Okay." 

"I won't be gone long, I'll be-"

"Don't bother, F/n and I are hanging out after school," Bella said cutting me off, "I'll bring her home." 

"Since when?" F/n asked her.

"Since I said so!" Then Bella pulled her away leading to their class. 

"Bye Levi! See you later!" F/n yelled out, while Bella was trying to get her attention. 

I sighed and started to walk away. Bella is so annoying sometimes, just pulling F/n away. I wasn't even done talking to her, to be honest. I had just got the idea that we could just have our first date after school at my house, but she was already gone so I can't talk to her about it...Maybe I'll just surprise her.

"Ugh, where are you going?" Furlan asked me I didn't even see he was following me.

"Home." 

"Yeah, but why? I figured you'd want to spend every waking second with F/n now that you're together." He joked. Something tells me I won't be hearing the end of this anytime soon.

"Yeah? So what?" I said not giving him any more reason to mess with me.

Furlan laughed, "You're not even going to deny it? Damn, she's got you wrapped around her finger." 

"Tch, you're the same with Bella." 

"I'm not," 

"Are too," I told him walking out of the school. He really was, if Bella asked him to do anything he would. He's been like that since he met her when we first started high school.

"So to your house?" 

"Why are you following me?" I asked him.

"Well I know you're planning something, I just want to see what it is, plus I'm here to tell you how funny it is to see you swooning all over F/n." He said with a smile on his face.

"I was not swooning over her." 

"Was too." 

"Why are we even friends?" 

Furlan started laughing again, "Because we sat at the same table in kindergarten." 

I learned on my car looking at him, "If that was it Erwin and I would be cool." 

Furlan rolled his eyes, "Well the kindergarten thing and I never liked F/n liked that." 

I chuckled a bit, that was true then. Furlan was one of the few boys that I grew up with that didn't develop a crush on F/n, so I never had an issue with him. I don't know why he didn't start to like her, but I'm grateful.

"Speaking of Erwin, have you talked to him and since that fight?" Furlan asked.

"Why would I?" 

"No reason, I was just wondering. But now that the two of you are dating do you think you can be cool with him?" 

"No," I told him. Now that I think about it. He doesn't know what happened between her and Erwin at that party, no one does. Just thinking about it was pissing me off, but I shook my head, I didn't have to think about anything like that happening to her again. She's with me now, nothing like that will happen to her again. 

Your Pov

Bella was talking my ear off, but honestly, I had stopped listening to her a while ago. 

I couldn't stop thinking about Levi. I mean that's nothing new, but still, somehow this was different now. We were dating. At first thinking about Levi always left this bittersweet taste in my mouth, but now it's just sweet. 

And speaking of sweet. I still cannot believe how sweet he is! Like omg, I can't even. Hand holding? Cuddling? They seem so out of character for him, but yet he's been doing them. Granted he's not flaunting us out and telling everyone we see. But he's not exactly being discreet either. And I don't mind...I kinda like it; I still feel bad though. I haven't seen Petra today. I wonder what she would say...And it doesn't help that Bella told me, everyone, been talking about us. I wonder what's gotten into him, but again I'm not really complaining.

The big thing now is what are we going to do for our first date? Should we go out to eat? To the movies? Stay home? I have no idea...Maybe We could do it at my house? "Bella?" 

"Hmm?" She responded. 

"What did you and Furlan do for your first date?" I asked her.

"I think we went out to eat nothing special." 

I sighed, that helped. 

Bella got this sly smiled on her face, "Are you trying to figure out what you and Levi are going to do for your first date?" 

"Yeah so?" 

"You two are just so cute!" She yelled. 

"God damn Bella, why don't you yell it louder so the guys in the next room can hear you," Ymir said sitting down next to me.

"Oh, Hey Ymir," I said as she sat down.

"So you and shortie finally got together?" Ymir said, then she leaned on closer to me, "And you've been busy," She joked pointed to the hickie on my neck smiling.

I covered it with my hand. I swear I'm going to kill Levi for this. "In other news, I ended up staring in his musical the other day," I said trying to change the subject. 

But Bella and Ymir just laughed.

"You guys are the worst," I said laying my head on my desk wishing I could disappear. I know they're just joking around, but this hickie was going to be the death of me today. Even some of my teachers just looked at it then looked at me, clearly judging me! 

"I bet he did that, trying to show Everyone they're going out now," Ymir joked to Bella.

"That totally seems like a Levi thing to do," She agreed with him.

"Don't you two have anything better to talk about?" I asked them.

"Nope." They both said at the same time.

I rolled my eyes, so annoying.

"Ymir, what did you and Krista do for your first date?" I asked. I remembered I still need an idea for that.

Ymir shrugged, "I don't remember, I think we just hung out." 

"You two are so much help," I said sighing. "What type of date do we have? I mean we've done pretty much everything two people could do with each other for a first date already. Movies going out to eat, all that stuff, we've done it before we went out." 

"But that's just it," Ymir said.

"What's it?" I asked.

Bella smiled, "You've done those things when you were just friends. Now you're dating, do them now, they might just be a lot more fun." 

I guess I didn't think of it like that...It might be a good Idea. "But, still I want it to be special." 

"You're over thinking it F/n," Ymir told me.

"I just want it to be perfect," I told them. I don't think I'm overthinking this. Levi is important to me, and this relationship we have now is a big deal for me. I'm happy, I'm happy with him, And I want everything we do to be perfect. "It's going to be our first date. After all this time we're finally together, this has to-" 

"Clam down F/n," Bella said almost laughing. "I'm sure whatever you and-" 

"Isabell, Ymir, and F/n, Would you all like to teach the class today? Or can I do my job." The teacher said. 

We all went quiet. This isn't exactly a good time to have this conversation. And then again maybe this is something I should talk to Levi about this. I wonder if he's thinking about it as much as I am? 

Later~~

Levi Pov

I glared at Furlan, "Shut the fuck up."

Furlan laughed, "I didn't say anything." 

"Tch," I continued to glare at him. I knew him coming over wasn't going to be anything but trouble. I had got distracted by talking to him upstairs, that I forgot the fucking noodles I put on. 

"Shit," I said was I was trying to get the burnt smell out of the house. This was not what I planned. I thought I could make F/n dinner, and we eat at my house. It was weird and stupid, but it felt like everything else we could do for our first date we've already done, so I decided I'd cook for her since it's rare that I do, but this turned to shit.

"How do I fucking burn noodles?" I said under my breath.

"That's what I'm trying to figure out," Furlan said still laughing. I'm glad he finds this funny.

"I don't see why you didn't just get take out or something," He said.

"Tch, I told you already, I wanted to do something she'd liked." 

"I'm sure she's like take out more then she'd like charcoal," he snickered. I could kill him. 

"Are you going to fucking help, or make jokes asshole?" I snapped at him.

"Wow, Levi you kiss your mom with that mouth?" A new voice said.

"Tch, what are you doing home?" I asked my mother who had just walked in.

"It's my house," She said sitting her purse down, "Hello Furlan." 

"Hello, Ms. Ackerman," My mom smiled at him then looked over to me, "So trying to burn my house down?" 

I rolled my eyes, "It's-" 

"He was trying to make a romantic dinner for him and F/n, but it blew up in his face," Furlan laughed.

"And here I thought you were great at everything." My mom joked. They both laughed.

They were getting a real kick out of this, weren't they? I shook my head ignoring them. I wanted this to be done before she got home today, but it looks like I'm going to have to get take out. Shit. Maybe today isn't a good day for our first date? Maybe I should tell her; we can do it another day...I hope this wasn't anything she was looking forward too. I sighed. "Shit." 

"Aw, you were really trying weren't you?" I heard my mom ask. 

"Tch, We'll do something else." 

"You're kinda making me feel bad now man," Furlan said. "You know when Bella and I first went out we went and got Pizza." 

"You didn't know Bella your whole life, so yeah, that's what the two of you did." I snapped at him. That was the thing. F/n and I had done everything together. That's why this was different. This was me doing something we haven't really done before. And in any other situation, I can cook perfectly fine. So why did I have to fuck up this time?

"Just but some more on once you clean the pot," My mom said. 

"I wanted to get this done before she got here," I told her.

"Well I don't see F/n, so you Furlan?" 

"No, ma'am." 

"OMG, Who tried to burn the house down?"

We all heard someone yell loudly, walking into the house. It was Bella. 

"Kuchel, what are you in here burning?" F/n said joking.

I sighed getting more and more frustrated. I looked at my mom, "You were saying?" 

She just gave me a regretful smiled, I rolled my eyes and looked at the both of them as they walked into the kitchen.

"I didn't know you were coming over here Furlan," Bella said walking to him, "I only came in cause I saw your car outside." 

"What were you trying to make Kuchel?" F/n asked sitting on the kitchen island. 

"Yeah, ask Levi." My mom answered pointed at me, F/n turned to me. 

"Wait, you burned something?" She asked walking over to where I was standing next to the sink. "Levi, I thought you were better than that." She joked. 

Not F/n too. 

I rolled my eyes, "I'd like to see you do a better job." 

"It takes a special person to burn-what was this? Noodles? Yeah, Levi, It's pretty hard to burn a dish you learn to make when you're seven, so Yeah I think I can do better." F/n said.

"You're lucky I like you," I told her walking off feeling annoyed. 

Your Pov

Levi seemed to be in a mood. He just left the kitchen and went to his room. 

I turned to look at his mom and Furlan who were here with him, "What was that all about?" 

"He wanted to make you dinner," Furlan said, "But it didn't go well as you can see." 

My eyes went wide with realization. He was trying to do that for me, and I was teasing him about it? Shit. How rude could I be, no wonder he's in his feelings. I dropped my face looking down at the floor.

"Oh, you two are so dramatic," Kuchel said being overly dramatic herself. 

"What?" I asked her.

"It's not that deep, just some pasta," She said.

"I think he got all mad about it, cause it was supposed to be your first date," Furlan added.

Now that just made me feel worse. Was he doing that for a first date? He was already five steps ahead of me, cause I still didn't even know what I wanted to do. But he figured it out. And I made fun of him. 

"I'm going to go talk to him," I told them leaving the kitchen.

I sighed to myself. I wonder how mad he is about this, usually, Levi doesn't let things bother him usually, and for him to leave like that. I hope he doesn't think I don't care, cause that couldn't be further from the truth. I walked into his room, and he was just on his bed reading.

I closed his door and leaned against it. 

"I'm sorry for making fun of you," I said after a while. 

Levi looked up, and I from his book then went back to reading.

I did a little gasped surprised he did that, "Levi!" 

"What?" 

"I said I was sorry!" I told him again, this time walking closer to him.

"I don't know what you're talking about." He said going back to his book.

I swear Levi can be too proud for his own good. I pulled his book from him, and he just glared at me. 

"Leeeeviiii," I said in a sing-song voice.

Levi just looked at me. 

"They told me you were trying to cook dinner for us, for like a first date." 

"And?" he asked just staring at me.

"And I made fun of you for burning it. And now I feel bad." I told him. "Let me make it up to you." 

Levi stretched out his back a little, "It's not a big deal, really. I left cause they were pissing me off, not you." 

I smiled, "I think we took this first date thing too seriously," I told him what I had honestly been thinking. Ymir and Bella had a good point earlier, whatever we did together would be better now since we're together. So wither it was eating out, him making something, going to the movies it didn't matter as long as I was with him.

Levi leaned in and kissed me, "You're probably right," 

"I know I am, at least for me. I was stressing trying to figure out where we would go since I first mentioned us going on a date." I told him the truth.

"I tried to surprise you, but I guess it wasn't in the card," He said.

I just hung my head, "We're such losers." 

"Yeah, you are," He joked. 

"Um, Keyword I said we're. As in me and you." I told him leaning to kiss him again.

Levi pulled me on to his lap kissing me back, "No, you're the only loser in this relationship." 

I don't think I'll ever get tired of his kisses; I ran my hand through his hair looking down at him while he stared at me. God, I was so in love with him. 

"I love you." 

"I love you." 

We both said it at the same time. I started to laugh hiding my face in his neck. "Admit it, We are both dorks." 

"So what do you wanna do now?" He asked I could hear the smile on his face.

"I don't know," I told him honestly.

"Do you wanna go out? It could be our first date." He said. 

I pulled away from him and looked at him, "Or, how about we both cook...together. That way if we burn something it will be on both of us." 

Levi tilted his head like he was thinking about it, "Fine." 

I looked at him acting like I was offended. "Fine?" 

"Tch, you know what I mean," He said pushing me off him. "Is Bella and Furlan still here?" He asked getting up.

I pouted at him moving me, but I shrugged, "I don't know, They were here before I came up here." Levi left out his room to go downstairs, and I followed him; only to see no one was here. 

"They left I guess," He said.

"Your mom too?" I asked him.

"No doubt she was just on her break and came here to chill out for a bit." 

"Oh..." I trailed off. So Levi and I were here alone. 

I walked to his refrigerator, "Okay, so let's get started." I said trying to find something we could make. "Hey, Levi what were you trying to ma-" I was cut off after I started to feel Levi kiss down my neck.

"What are you doing?" I asked him half laughing and enjoying the sensations he was sending throughout my body.

"We're alone," He said, and I could hear the devilish smirk that was no doubt on his face.

I rolled my eyes and walked away. "So?" 

"We haven't really been alone like this since the other night." He said.

I looked back at Levi, "What are you trying to say?" I said with a sly smiled growing on my face, I don't know why I was playing this game with him.

Levi's face went straight, "I was just pointing it out." Then he went into a cabinet and pulled something out, "So do you want to do rice or noodles?" 

"Levi." I snapped at him.

"What?" He frowned. 

"Are we having sex or not?" I asked him bluntly, but I couldn't help but be a bit embarrassed by my outburst. 

"Tch, I thought you didn't want to, that's why I stopped." He told me.

"I was trying to tease you," I told him. 

Levi moved closer to me; until he was right infount of me. "I know, but you suck at it." 

"Meanie," I told him pouting.

"beautiful." Then Levi put his hands on the side of my face and started to lean in kissing me.

I swear he'll be the death of me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> I really hope you liked this one; it was supposed to just be fluff and cute moments between reader and Levi since I know how much you guys like that! So if you liked this chapter just drop a comment telling me what you liked or whatever anything is appreciated! 
> 
> So, guys, I set up a Ko-Fi. Because I'll be honest I'm very short on money this month and I need a way to bring in any extra money and I'm pulling in extra hours at work and a friend recommended I do this so here I am. Heres a link:
> 
> http://ko-fi.com/theblackfangirl
> 
> And by no means does this mean I won't write for this story, Or that you have to donate. I'm still finishing this story. I just made the Ko-fi to anyone that may want a commission because I write for other characters too, not just Levi. But I digress.
> 
> Either way, I love all of you with every fiber of my being!! And I love that you read this story regardless or anything, you all are the best!
> 
> xoxo


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I was going through a writer's block but season 3's Levi has temporary cured me bless him and his jawline

Levi Pov

"What are we doing for prom?" F/n asked me closing her locker.

This was random.

"Tch, I didn't even know you wanted to go," I told her.

"Of course I want to go! Idiot." 

"You never like dances, how am I supposed to know you want to go to this one?" I asked her.

F/n leaned against her locker and was looking in the air dreamily, "Prom is different than the other dances. It's the last one, the last time you get to dress up and just go have fun. It's the last even before we graduate we have to go. It's the biggest moment in a girl life I mean if she doesn't get married that is." 

I raised my eyebrow at her, "You're not getting married?" 

F/n's head snapped at me, and I could tell she was embarrassed because she wouldn't look me in the eye, "Er, I don't know--it--it depends." 

"Depends on what?" I asked.

"I don't know if he asks me." She answered looking away.

"Who's he?" 

F/n hit my arm, "Stop teasing me." She said putting her face in her hands. "You're so mean." 

I smiled and grabbed one of her hands and pulled her closer to me; she was still pouting. God, she was beautiful. I kissed her then pulled back, "Don't worry I'll ask you one day if he doesn't." 

F/n groaned hiding her face in my neck, but I could feel her smiling, "You're such an ass." 

"You've mentioned that." 

She was about to say something, but my phone started ringing. I swear people call me at the worst times. Basically anytime I'm with F/n.

"Are you going to answer that?" F/n asked me.

"No," I told her turning the volume down without taking my phone out my pocket.

F/n moved away from me shaking her head and started to walk to her class, "Anyway what colors are we wearing for prom?" 

I sighed, "Whatever color you want I don't care." 

"Levi, I need more of an input from you if this is going to be our practice wedding." She said.

"What was that?" I asked her not being able to stop myself from smiling.

F/n snapped he hand over her mouth, "Nothing. I said nothing." She said.

I was about to grabbed her again to pull her close to me, but she and already started to run off, "I didn't say anything, I'll see you after school!" She waved at me, and I lost sight of her in the crowd of people. 

So she thinks about getting married to me too. 

I can't explain why, but that makes me feel like the happiest man in the world.

Your Pov

~~later

"Are you going to answer your phone?" I asked Levi who was just letting his phone ring. He's been doing this all day.

"No," He answered while he continued to read whatever book he was reading. 

I sighed, he was always like this with his phone. why can't he just answer it like a normal person? "What do you have against answering your phone Levi?" 

"I don't feel like talking," He answered like it was obvious.

I sat up and reached over to get his phone, "You don't know if it's important or not?" 

"Can't be that important." 

I rolled my eyes at him; I didn't recognize the number but before I could answer they hung up.

"If it's really important they'd call back." 

"Levi that was like the second time they called!" I told him.

Levi didn't respond. He's so stubborn. I laid back down on his bed, "You suck." 

Levi and I had been dating for about a week now, and it was perfect. It wasn't that different from how we were before just now we were close. I don't think I'm ever going to get over how dumb we both were. We could have been dating for so long, but because we both were idiots we didn't. But that's over now. We're together. Everyone seems cool with it too. Surprisingly I haven't seen or heard from Petra. I still feel a bit bad about the whole thing with her, and I haven't heard anything from Erwin either. I mean I've seen him around the school, but I haven't actually talked to him since we broke up. I feel like I should say something to him, but again I did break up with him cause I was angry with him. He was spreading rumors about me after all. Yet, I don't see why I can't be friends with him. Other than that it wasn't like he was a bad boyfriend.

I wonder what Levi would think about me talking to him, Hmm. Better yet I wonder if he'll tell me about what happened with the two of them now? "Levi, what happened with you and Erwin?" I asked him.

Levi looked up at me, "What?" 

"I asked what happened-" 

"I heard you, I want to know why you want to know?" 

"Well, You've always avoided it, now I'm asking for all the details." 

"You know why," Levi answered. 

I rolled my eyes, "So it was just because he liked me?" 

Levi didn't say anything. 

I laughed a little, "So you really were determined to keep all the guys away from me?" 

"You did the same with the girls." 

"I did not!" I told him.

"So you didn't tell Petra I was gay?" 

"Yes, but that was the only time!" 

"Sure," He said mocking me.

"Don't sure me you ass," I told him playfully hitting him, "You're the one who scared all the girls away, not me." 

"Tch, I-" 

But before he could finish talking his phone started to ring again. I sighed, "Give it here." 

Without even looking at it Levi tossed it to me. Why even have a phone if he wasn't going to answer it when it rang?

"Hello?" 

"Hi, I'm calling for Levi Ackerman. It's Dr. Logan from the theater department at the college." 

I glared at Levi. It was the Director of the play, who knows what he was calling about, and he'd been ignoring him. "Hey, Dr. Logan this is F/n remember from the opening night?" I told him.

I could hear the smile in the doctor's voice, "Oh, Hello F/n Is Levi around?" 

"He is actually," I said and passed the phone to Levi smiling, "It's for you." 

Levi looked at me rolling his eyes, "Hello?" 

I watched him talk then suddenly Levi sat up. 

"Seriously?" He said.

What did he just tell Levi?

"Um...Okay. I mean have to talk to my mother-" 

"Yeah," 

Levi went quite. Whatever he was telling Levi it was important.

"I'll be in touch." Then Levi hung up.

"What happened?" I asked him.

Levi looked at me, "Apparently one of Doc's friends from L.A. was at one of the shows and really liked me and wants me to audition for a show out there." 

"What!" I yelled.

Levi just had this black expression. Was he in shock? He should be excited! "Levi that's great! Omg! He liked you enough to want you to go out to L.A. That's amazing!" I told him.

"It's not that big of a deal, I might not even go," Levi said laying back down. 

"The hell you are, Levi how many times does this type of thing happen?" 

"You're overreacting." He said picking his book back up.

I snatched it from him. "Levi! This is serious." Why was he not getting this? Anyone would be frecking out about this. 

"Clam down, Did you even think about how I would even get out there? Or what the show even is? Yeah, it's all sounds nice but at the end of the day the likely hood of me being successful is low so why bother?" 

"Wh-wha-Why bother? Levi?" I got up, "Let's see what Mikasa and your mom have to say about this." 

Levi tried to stop me, but I kept going. I left out his room and ran downstairs "Mikasa! Kuchel!" I yelled after seeing them both in the kitchen. 

"Where's the fire?" Kuchel asked turning at me.

"Kuchel, Mikasa, Levi just got a call from the director from the play and guess what?" I asked them.

"He got another scholarship?" HIs mother asked.

"No, better," I said smiling.

"F/n," I heard my name said in a warning tone. It was Levi he had just walking in the room.

"Why is F/n in here acting like an idiot," Mikasa asked.

"It's nothing." He answered them.

I shook my head why was he still acting like this? I turned back at them, "Some guy in L.A. saw Levi in the musical and want him for a show!" 

"I'm not going to do it," Levi spoke up. 

"Why not?" I asked him. Then I looked back at his mom, "Isn't this great?" 

"When did this happen?" Mikasa asked.

"Just now." 

"Wait, explain this again?" Kuchel asked.

"The-" 

"It doesn't matter, I don't want to do it, and I'm not," Levi said butting me off.

"Please tell Levi that he's being insane!" I told her.

"F/n shut up for a second," Kuchel told me.

I pouted. But she didn't pay any attention to me. Kuchel looked back at Levi, "Alright explain what's going on?" 

Levi rolled his eyes, "Just some guy wanted me to visit California for some audition, but I'm not going to do it." 

"Okay," was all she said when she went back to doing whatever she was doing.

"Seriously?" I asked looking at them both.

"Levi doesn't want to do it, not much I can say about it." She shrugged off.

"But why?" I asked Levi. I just couldn't wrap my head around why he wouldn't want to take an opportunity like this. It's amazing. He could be famous; he could be rich, all his problems with taking care of his mom and Mikasa could just go away in a flash, why not?

"Can we drop it?" He asked me leaning on the wall. 

I just frowned, I just don't get it. I stared Levi down I couldn't figure him out right now. Why not? It's the only thing I can wonder, but I know right now if I keep pestering him about it, it will only aggravate him and I won't get an answer. Why does he have to act like such a toddler sometimes? I sighed, "Fine, I'll drop it for now-" 

"You sound like you're being an idiot if you ask me," Mikasa spoke up.

"I didn't ask you," Levi said walking out the room and back upstairs. 

I looked back at Mikasa and Kuchel, "Kuchel you really don't think it's a good Idea? I mean come one this is Levi we're talking about. He's amazing! He's been in theater forever and now someone wants him for a real audition. In L.A! Why not? I can't see how this can't be a dream come true for him. You have to talk some sense into him." 

Kuchel just laughed a little, "You know just as well as I do; once Levi's made up his mind it's no changing it-" 

"But-"

"I know it sounds like some dream come true or whatever, but I'm sure Levi has a good reason for not wanting to go through with it. If you ask me it kinda sounds like a scam." 

I rolled my eyes, "I highly doubt that. Plus when Levi first answered the phone he looked pretty excited; I don't know what changed though. He's being stupid if you ask me." 

"I agree, he's always going on and on about getting a job and supporting us, then here comes a chance to do something big and he says no," Mikasa added.

I nodded. 

Kuchel sighed, "It's his life girls, and again it doesn't even sound like it's a sure thing he could do. Its an Audition, not a guarantee, it sounds like Levi is playing it safe." 

"When he doesn't need to," I added.

"Well, I don't know what to tell you F/n." She said putting her hands on her hips, "Like I said, It's Levi's life he can make his own choices when it comes to things like that. Now, the two of you get out of here unless you're helping me cook dinner." Kuchel told Mikasa and me. Making both of us get up and leave.

I walked back up to Levi's room to see him back on his bed reading. 

I sighed, why was he being so stubborn about this? 

"Levi?" 

"Tch, I'm talking about it anymore, I don't know why you had to run your mouth to my mom and Mikasa." He snappted

I sighed again; I really wasn't trying to argue about this. "Fine," I told him sitting down and facing away from him. I could feel his eyes burning a whole in my back, but I was determend to ignore him. He wants to drop it so bad I'll drop it. But that doesn't mean I have to be happy about it. If it were me, I'd jump at this chance. It's like a once in a lifetime opportunity. 

"F/n?" He called my name after a while, but I ignored him looking at my own phone. 

"F/n?" 

I still ignored him. 

I felt Levi's foot kick my back, "Answer me." 

I only got up, "You know I have some stuff at home I need to do." 

"Are you seriously leaving?" I heard him asking as I walked to my window.

"No, I'm just pretending like I'm leaving," I said going out the window and going to my own room. I heard him call me a few more times, but I still ignored him closing my window when I got in my room and closing my curtains. 

I know it's kind of a jerk move for me to treat him like this, but I'm just so upset. I can't figure out why he's acting like this. I mean It's an amazing thing! He could be on a TV Show! He has the chance to be rich! It would take care of all the stuff I know he worries about. He has the chance to take care of his mom, and all he has to do is an audition. And let's be real I'm sure the guy wouldn't want Levi just to audition if he already didn't think Levi is right for the part. Whoever it is, they want Levi! So why can't he just go with it? It's frustrating! I just want whats best for him, and he's acting like he's not even considering it.

God, Levi is so infuriating sometimes. 

Levi Pov

I went to F/n house to talk only to see she was sleep. 

I groaned looking at her resting body; she's really pissed at me about this. 

I don't get why she's making a big deal out of this. I mean it sounds great, but at the same time, it doesn't. One, how will I get out there? Two, how do I support myself out there? I can't just stay at a studio if I do get the part. Three, What if it just doesn't work out then what? I'd just wasted who knows how much money. Four, what about school? I have to finish the year out still, and I have plans for college. And Five, if I'm out somewhere in L.A., then I won't be with her...

I don't want to be away from her; we just got together; there's just so much we still have to do, and be being out somewhere in L.A. just wouldn't work out. Didn't she think about that? Did she even care? 

I walked back into my house, I guess she won't talk to me until tomorrow, or at least I hope. I'm not trying to argue about this. But she's making this hard. She's overreacting. 

"Levi," I heard my mom call my name from the living room. I stopped and leaned on the doorframe. 

"Sit down with me for a while," she said.

"Tch, I'm tired." 

"Levi come on. I feel like we never talk anymore." 

"The last time we really talked was when you were giving me a key to a hotel," I told her plainly.

"Well, that was about F/n too, I want to talk about you." She said.

"Tch, if this is about that audition I'm not going to do it," I told her.

"I wasn't going to talk about that," She started to say, "But since you brought it up why don't you tell me why not? Not saying that you have to of anything, I just want to know why don't you want too, It seems like something you'd like." 

"Does it even matter?" I asked her.

"Is it because of F/n?" she asked.

I frowned, "What does she-she doesn't have anything to do with it." 

My mom raised her eyebrow, "I think it does." 

"Or maybe it's the fact that we don't have money like that, you can't just pay for a trip for me to go to L.A. You can bearly keep the bills paid here." 

"Why do you always feel like you have to worry about the bills? It's not something you need to concern yourself with you're just a child." She told me, and I could feel myself getting frustrated.

"Because I live he and you're my mother," I snapped at her.

"You know you dad still helps out with the bills when it's too much, so stop worry about it so much." 

"And that wouldn't be the case if you'd just let me get a fucking job." I snapped at her. I hated the idea of her asking him for money. Not when I could easily work and just make money for us. But she won't let me get a job not while I'm in school. 

"Watch your tone, Levi." My mom said to me. 

I took a deep breath, "Why won't you just let me get a job? This wouldn't be an issue, and I wouldn't even have to move out for college if you just let me get a job. And then you can leave that asshole to his other family and not have anything to do with him." 

"Levi, he's still your father, so please be respectful. And you know why I want you to focus on school-" 

"And If I go to L.A that will be different how?" I asked her.

"Well, I assume that ties into your career path." She said.

"Well, it's not what I'm going to do." 

"And that's fine too, Levi I just want whats best for you." She started to say, "Whatever you choose to do I want it to be your choice 100% And you're not doing it for anyone, but yourself. Don't make choices because you think it will help me or Mikasa or even F/n. You have to do things for you okay?" 

"Why are you saying this?" I asked her. 

She smiled at me, "Because I know how you are Levi, I want the best for you; and I know being an actor or singer has always been a dream of yours, and now you have a chance to do something, and you say no? It can only because of you thinking about everyone else but you." 

I didn't say anything. I mean she wasn't wrong, but still...Not wanting to be without F/n was my choice. 

"I don-"

"Just think about it some more Levi," She cut me off saying. 

I nodded. Maybe it was something I just needed to think about more. I went ahead and walked up to my room. I guess it was good F/n wasn't here, I do need to think about this more, Maybe this was something I could do? I walked into my room only to be surprised when I saw F/n laying in my bed sleep. 

I sighed, laying down next to her. I didn't say anything to her I only faced her. By now she was just staring back at me, we both didn't say anything to each other. 

"Turns out, I don't like sleeping without you..." She mumbled.

"I thought you weren't talking to me?" 

"I'm not." 

:"Could have fooled me." 

"Look, I'm sorry. It's your life; I get that. It's just annoying knowing you have the chance to be great, but you just won't even try." 

"Did you ever think about what if I do move out to L.A?" I asked her, "What that would mean for us?" 

"No..." She trailed off, "But it's not like I wouldn't see you anymore Levi. Besides we could just be in a long distance relationship while you're gone. It's not that big of a deal." 

"It's a big deal for me," I told her honestly.

"Levi-" 

"I've wanted to be with you most of my life, F/n. And now we're actually together; I'm not giving this up for anything." 

F/n moved closer to me, and leaned in and gave me a little kiss, "You are so dramatic, It's not like I'm saying we're going to break up. Cause we're not. I'm just as happy that we're finally together, and I wouldn't want anything else ever! But I know what this means for you Levi. This is incredible. You can make money for your family; you have a chance to work and make good money and still do what you love. Yeah, it will be far away, but you'll be able to help your mom out and won't have to rely on your dad anymore. And I know you want that more than anything." 

I groaned, "I want you more." I told her kissing her.

F/n giggled, "And you still have me." 

"I want all of you all the time," I told her moving on top of her kissing her neck. 

F/n still laughed, "And I want you too." But then she pushed me back and looked into my eyes, "Just promise me you'll think about it?" 

"Fine," I said going back to kissing her, but F/n pushed me away again. 

"Promise?" 

"Okay, I will," I said sighing. 

Then she smiled and pulled me into another kiss. 

I know she's right. I know my mom is right, and honestly now I think I might go for it. But leaving her here for however long will be the worst part of it. I'm just too in love with her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter!!
> 
> So this chapter was mixed a little fluff a little angst lots of story plot building good times :) and more to come fluff that is and who knows maybe some more smut
> 
> I'm sorry I've been MIA again I've been going through a writer's block caused by a lot of stress in general with home and work my life has just been a mess. But I'd like to think seeing Levi's beautiful has cured me for a while.
> 
> Anyways again I really hope you guys liked this chapter let me know in the comments what you think will happen next? Will Levi take the job? Will him F/n be okay with long distance? what color are they wearing to prom? Will they even go to prom? I wanna know what you guys think :)
> 
> Thanks again!!
> 
> xoxo


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter and It gets a bit smutty in this one 
> 
> *Winks

Your Pov

I woke up in Levi's bed like I've been doing since we started dating, sometimes he'll sleep over my house, but for the most part, we were always over his house. I just like it here; it's a bit more lively. Between his mom and Mikasa, they're always doing or saying something that just so entertaining. Then again it's always been this way; it's only different now because Levi and I are dating. 

I untangled myself from Levi's arms and started to sit up and look at him. I still can't help but find it funny now knowing how much of a cuddler Levi is. He was never this way when we were just friends, it's like he was controlling himself all that time but now that we're together all he threw all that holding back out the window. 

"Why are you up? It's Saturday we don't have anything to do." I heard Levi said in a grumpy voice. 

I laughed at him a little, I know he hates waking up early especially on weekends. "I'm sorry, I just natural wake up like this Levi you know this," I told him. 

I reached over to look at the time on my phone, and it said it was 12:45 I snorted. "Levi we've been sleeping half the day get up!" I told him hitting him.

He just groaned.

"Levi come on, we can't stay in bed all day," I told him moving down speaking in his ear.

Levi didn't say anything, he just turned over to look at me putting his fingers in my hair, "You have bed head." He told me smiling.

"As if you could talk," I snorted back at him. Levi's hair was a mess. 

He was always one to keep it nice and neat, so mornings like this was always a nice treat to see him like this. Levi rolled his eyes at me and started to sit up. 

I smiled at him some more, "Good morning good looking," I teased him.

"Tch, we can get something to eat then we're going back to bed." He said still sounding sleepy. He was so cute. And I wasn't going to give him a hard time about this. I know why he just wants to spend all day in bed. 

I kissed him on his cheek. "Sure thing!" Then I got up and started to look for some pants.

He's leaving next month. 

Levi decided he'd give the L.A. thing a shot. I'm happy about it. But it's a little bittersweet. I mean Levi will be so far away, but it's okay, he's moving towards his dream, and I think that's what he should be doing, yeah it will be a bit lonely without him, but he's just going to be there for a little. And if he gets the part, he'll still be here every now and then. We'll be okay. I know Levi still has an issue with it, but he I keep telling him it will be okay and it's not like its forever. But because of him leaving so soon he wants to spend as much time together as he can. It's cute really. Seeing Levi seem so needy and attached. It's not a side I see a lot of, and bearly knew he had. I bet no one would believe me if I told them Levi was this way.

I think it just adds to his charm. I looked over at Levi who was now getting up and putting on a shirt. Levi is really my everything. I really hope this show works out. I know it would make him so happy; even if he wants to act grumpy about going. He's going to go there and have fun. And knowing Levi's dream could come true just makes me so happy.

"Quit staring weirdo," Levi said taking me out of my thoughts.

"I was not staring." 

"Lier," He said walking to his door.

"Jerk," I told him smiling and walking to hug his back. 

"Tch, Let's get something to eat." He said walking away while I tried to stay attached to him making both of us walk funny.

"So annoying," Levi said under his breath, but I could hear the smile in his voice. 

I'll defiantly miss mornings like this when he's gone.

Levi Pov

F/n and I sat in her room on her bed. 

The only reason we were over here was that my mom and Mikasa were home and I wanted to be with F/n without anyone interfering, and her mom wasn't here so this was probably the only free time we were getting today, and I wanted to take advantage of it. But F/n was still too busy on her phone. 

It was annoying how much she stays on that thing sometimes.

"What do you want for your birthday?" F/n asked out of nowhere.

"I don't know," I answered her. 

F/n groaned, "Okay what do you want for Christmas?" 

I rolled my eyes, "Nothing." 

F/n moved so her head was on my lap and she looked up and me, "You don't want anything for your birthday?" 

"Tch, it's not till late next month, why are you asking now?" 

"I want to know what to get you, so I can start saying." 

"I don't want anything," I told her.

"Come on Levi; I know you want something tell me!" She asked.

I smirked looking down at her, "I got what I want already," I gave her a quick kiss, "You."

F/n sat up and started laughing, "God, you are cheesy. Did you do this with Petra? Cause if so no wonder she left you." She teased.

I rolled my eyes, "Were you this annoying with Erwin?" 

"Maybe," She said with a sly smile. F/n moved and straddled me and was looking into my eyes. "But I have to admit. I like cheesy Levi. It's cute." 

"So you only like me when I'm cheesy?" 

F/n rolled her eyes, "You know what I mean." 

F/n started to kiss me, and I went right with it. Moving my fingers through her hair. It was rare she took the lead when we were making out, so it was something I liked. I don't know something about her wanting to control what we did was hot. 

F/n then pushed me back, so I was laying down while she looked at me from above. 

She was biting her lip, "How are you so hot?" 

"Is your door locked?" I asked her, half of me teasing her and half being serious. We actually hadn't done it at her house since the time her mom walked in on us.

The color seemed to drain from F/n's face; while she got up to lock her door. She turned back around, "Better?" 

I didn't say anything; I watched her walk back over to me, but she sat on the other side of the bed facing away from me.

"What are you doing?" I asked her confused.

"You ruined the moment." She said not looking at me.

I snorted. "You're such a baby," I said moving behind her and kissing her neck.

"Am not," She protested.

"Are too," I said kissing to her ear and back down. I was going over all those places I know where she feels the most sensitive and hearing her moan was music to my ears. It only encouraged me to keep going. I could tell F/n was still trying to hold up her grudge and not give in, but slowly I know her resolves was disappearing. 

"You're such a tease," She finally said in a hushed voice turned around and pushed me back down. I smiled knowing that I won. 

F/n was straddling me again when she bent over to kiss me on the lips. She started to trail down all the way to my pants. I bit my lip watching her move her hand rubbing against my cock through my boxers until she finally took it out. We kept eye contact with each over all the way till she put me in her mouth, making me hiss and throw my head back. It wasn't often she went did this, mostly cause I didn't really like the idea of it too much, and I didn't want to come from a blowjob, But fuck it felt like heaven. 

F/n pulled away catching her breath after a while, so I took this chance to pull her to me and turned her over. I was done with the foreplay, I wanted F/n now. I wanted to hear her scream my name. I kissed her again and started to pull off her shirt, and she went with it, once it was off I went to kiss down to her breast. She just tasted so sweet. It's something about the way we moved with each other; it just felt like we were made for each other.

We were so into each other I almost missed the knock on her door.

"F/n!" 

We both froze. It was her mom.

Shit.

"Your dad's here, come say hi!" He mom said from the other side of the door.

"Ugh- um...Just give me a minute!" F/n called back.

I looked down at F/n who was covering her face. "This is the last time we try and have sex at my house," she said.

I smirked at her going back to kiss her neck, "Levi what are you doing? My parents are downstairs." She said in a harsh whisper.

"If you shut up they'll never know," I told her. I was willing to risk it if she was. It was exciting. 

"Levi we-" F/n called my name to protest, but she stopped once she felt me press my cock against her. 

"Like I said shut up," I told her pushing myself slowly into her. F/n gasped but kept quite. Her hold on me grew tighter and tighter as I thrust in and out of her. I went a bit faster than normal because I wanted her to come quick. I moved when I felt myself getting closer taking myself out and lifting her legs, so I get her to come faster. I picked up the pace some more, and I noticed it was getting harder for her to keep quite to the point F/n was coving her own mouth. 

The idea that we could get caught was just getting me more turned on, shit. It was driving me crazy.

"Levi-I'm so-"

"Shut up-" I grunted at her. I could tell she was closer to how her walls were throbbing against me. The finally after a few more thrust F/n pulled her head went back, and she dug her nails into my sink. Seeing her like that was just what I needed so as I felt myself I pulled out and came on her stomach. 

Breath heavey I moved and laid down beside her on her bed. Fuck, that was a lot.

"You are such an asshole Levi." F/n said after a moment.

"I don't know about doing any ass stuff right now," I joked with her.

F/n only clicked her tounge in response getting up and getting a towel wiping my seed off her.

I watched not being able to help but feel a little gulity. I was so cought up at the moment I didn't even think about a condom. "Er- sorry," I told her.

F/n Looked over at me, "It's-um fine...a little gross, but it's okay."

"F/n hurry up!" We both heard her mom yell out.

"I'm on my way!" F/n yelled back.

"Why is he even here?" She said under her breath, "So annoying." 

I just watched her rush around to put her clothes on. 

I'm going to miss this. 

I shook my head to myself. I gotta remember it wasn't going to belong. Just about a week out there for the audition and then if everything works out I'll be out there for about two months for filming. So I should back way before graduation and all that stuff. But still, it felt like it was going to be for forever. What do I even do not seeing her every day? I mean I'm sure I'll be alright, but what does that mean for her while she's here? Will guys try and hint on her? What if something happens at home? I won't be here to protect her. 

But on the other side, this will be good. I can make some money I can support the people I care about. I can support myself. It's all I've ever wanted besides F/n and this way I can have both.

"Levi go home," F/n snapped at me.

I raised my eyebrow at her, "Why?" 

"Why?" She repeated. "Because if my dad found out you were here, he'd put two and two together and kill you," She snapped.

"Over exaggerate much?" 

F/n walked over to me now fully dressed, "I love you Levi but go home," She gave me a quick kiss, "I'll see you later." Then she ran out of her room closing her door.

I sighed, today was supposed to be our day to just be lazy in bed all day. Who knows how often we'll get to do this after I leave? I got back inside my own room; what do I do now? Should I just lay around until F/n comes back? Should I mess with my mom or Mikasa? I got homework done already. Maybe some reading? I swear it's no fun when she's not here. I groaned what was I doing before we started dating? I realize F/n are in our honeymoon phase, but something tells me this is going to last for a while. I mean I'm this way with her because I love her, and I finally can show her just how much. I know I won't be changing anytime soon; I'm going to love her for the rest of my life after all. 

My phone started to ring, I answered it without paying attention to who it was. See this was the time to call me; when I was alone, and F/n wasn't here. 

"Yeah?" I answered it.

"Oh, wow you answered this time." The voice I recognized as Petra said. What did she want?

"What's up?" I asked getting to the point. 

"Er, I was just seeing if F/n was around. I've sorta been trying to get in contact with her." She said.

"No, she isn't around right now, but I'll give her your number," I told her.

"Oh," Petra sounded a little disappointed. What did she have to talk to F/n about? "Everything alright?" 

"Actually-" Petra paused, "Yeah everything is fine. Just let F/n know I was looking for her." Then Petra hung up. 

I sighed, What was that about? I haven't actually heard from Petra since the play was over. So that felt kinda random. I think her and F/n were maybe starting to be friends or something, not that I minded. Maybe it was a bit weird since I dated Petra, but they both act pretty maturely about the whole thing. I know F/n feels wrong about it like she thinks she stole me from Petra, but I've already explained She didn't steal me from anyone I was already hers. But that didn't seem to make her feel all that much better. 

I set my phone down; I think I'll just wait until F/n gets back, everything else is so dull without her.

Your Pov

"So I heard you and Levi started dating," My dad said.

"Uh huh," I answered him. 

It wasn't that I didn't love my dad because I did. It was just hard sometimes. Remembering what he did only a few years ago, what he put my mom through. I don't know how she could forgive for it; so needless to say I still had some issue with him. But that still didn't mean things didn't get awkward between us from time to time.

And this was one of those times. 

I don't know why maybe it was because I was just with Levi, who I was going to kill when I see again. I cannot believe he'd pull a trick like that with my parents so close. I digress just seeing my dad felt weird now...Weirder.

"Do you want to go hang out?" He asked me.

"Hang?" 

"I'm trying F/n," He said.

I just nodded, "Well, no I'd just wanted to stay home today." 

"Anything new?" He asked.

"No not-" 

"You guys doing alright in here need anything?" My mom cut me off without knowing, walking into the room, "I just put dinner on it should be done in a bit." 

"I was just about to leave actually," I said getting up. "Er, I'll be over at Levi's." 

"F/n wait," My dad said, "Don't you wanna stay here with your own family. You're always over Kuchel's house." 

"How would you know, you don't even live here." I snapped at him. I don't know why I did that. I was just annoyed by the comment.

"F/n," My mother snapped at me.

Well, I felt bad now because she was upset with me for saying that. 

"Maybe that's a good reason for you to stay here. Doesn't seem like your mom's teaching you too much respect." My dad said.

"That's funny coming from you," I couldn't help but say. I didn't like what he was implying.

"F/n." 

Both my mom and dad said in a warning tone.

"Maybe we should do this later; you want Levi to come over F/n? He can join us for dinner." 

"I thought it would just be the three of us?" My dad asked.

"Levi comes over from time to time, him and Mikasa." My mom answered him. "I'd say they spend about the same time over both houses. You know they've always been joined at the hip (dad's name)." 

"But now he's a grown man. Their not kids anymore (Mom's name)" My dad spat.

"You don't-" 

"F/n hush," My mom cut me off again, "Levi is still just a little boy, he should come over, you'd get to see how cute they are together." 

My dad just sighed, "Is it wrong that I just want to spend the night with my family without some Ackerman getting in the way?" 

"What's that supposed to mean?" My mom asked.

"You know just what I meant." My dad spat back at her. 

My mom started to say something else, but I started to toon them out. I got good at that growing up, nice to know I could still. I sighed as I slowly started to walk to the steps to get back to my room. I don't know why she even invited him it wasn't like they would do anything but argue. If they weren't fucking each other, they were yelling at each other. They're kidding themselves thinking they could be anything else. 

Almost makes me wonder if they ever really liked each other. 

By now I had made it back to my room, see they didn't even notice I left they were so wrapped in yelling at each other proving the other wrong. I quickly went over to Levi's room from my window; once I was in his room, I saw he was sleep. 

Must be nice. 

I laughed to myself; this is a great time to get some payback. So being as quite as I could I crept to him then in a loud yell screamed, "Canon ball!" Jumping on him.

Levi jumped up shocked, and I couldn't help but laugh at his wide eye expression, It was so cute! "Gotcha!" 

Levi groaned rubbing his face, "You are such an idiot." 

I was still laughing; I needed this. Especially after seeing my mom and dad go at it like that. After a moment my laughter died down, "Levi?" 

"What?" He asked in an annoyed voice. 

"If we stayed with each other for a long time...or like if we got married or something- do you think we'd end up like our parents?" I asked him.

"Huh?" 

I sighed, moving so I could look him in the face, "Like do you think we'd end up hating each other one day?" 

"There's no way I could ever hate you F/n," Levi said, "What happened over there?" 

"Nothing, I was just thinking..." I started to tell him, "Or what if I do something and it makes you hate me? Or if you do something and I end up hating you, if you just get tired and leave, or-

"I'm not my dad, and you're not your mom." Levi said cutting me off, "We're us. We love each other, nothing is ever going to change that." Levi kissed me. He rested his head to mine, "Alright." 

I sighed, "But what if-" 

"Who cares about what if?" 

"I just want us to last forever Levi...I love you so much, and I'd hate myself forever if we weren't together..." 

"Says the girl who was crying about me not going to L.A." He quipped.

"That's different; you know what I-" Levi cut me off again this time by kissing me. 

"I know what you meant. And I love you too, nothing will ever change that. You can't do anything to make me hate you. You're stuck with me." He smirked kissing me on the forehead. "I love you F/n." He said again.

I didn't say anything. 

I just hoped he was right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Guess what I made a discord! https://discord.gg/S6FChAQ
> 
> This way I can talk to everyone! I always feel a bit bad when I don't respond to all the comments so this way I can talk to all of you, and we can fangirl about Levi and all sorts of other things together!
> 
> Anyways this was a fluffy smutty chapter. I think Levi and reader are really cute together it be a shame if something was to happened...
> 
> Anyways this was a fun chapter to write, but ya girl is sleepy now and has to work in the morning~
> 
> So again I hope you enjoyed this chapter leave a kudo or a comment Or join the discord! I'd love to all of you! 
> 
> xoxo


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter!
> 
> Did you know I have a discord for this fic? If you want we can talk and scream about Levi! Here's the link!! https://discord.gg/S6FChAQ
> 
> And did you know I have a playlist for this fic? I think the songs work well with the story and if you ever think I should add a song just tell me! Heres the link!   
> https://open.spotify.com/user/1258003038/playlist/2kBd98ZbURnhuH4T68ukRt
> 
> Just copy and paste! 
> 
> :)

Your Pov

"Levi, you know you don't have to follow me everywhere?" I closed my locker and looked at Levi who was standing beside it. 

"I do not follow you," He said dryly.

"Yeah, you do," Ymir butted in.

Levi glared at her, "No one asked you." 

"I'm just saying you seem really needy that all," Ymir said stepping closer to Levi.

"Says the girl who can't keep her hands off of Christa for two seconds," Levi told her getting closer.

"F/n doesn't need a shadow is my point," She told him.

Levi stepped closer to her, "I'm just saying take your own advice." 

"Christa you wanna just leave them?" I asked her as I had already started to walk to class. I don't know why they get into it with each other, but Levi and Ymir seemed to just clash like that at times. 

"Those two are hopeless," Christa said shaking her head.

I smiled, "And somehow we love them." 

"By the way, I don't think I've ever told you, that you and Levi are really cute together," She said smiling.

"Aw, thanks." Christa was such a sweet person. She's always been this way, although I know I've heard her go off on Ymir a few times, and it's like the strangest thing ever. The girl can curse like a sailor.

"F/n!" 

I heard my name called out and saw it was Bella and Sasha walking up to me, "Hey," 

"What are you doing for the holiday? Cause my parents are renting out this really cool place and they said I could invite some friends." Sasha told me, "It's going to be so exciting you should come. I've already asked Annie, Bella- Christa you and Ymir can come too. I haven't seen Mikasa yet F/n you in?" 

"Of course she's in it's going to be a sleepover," Bella answered.

"Actually no," I told them.

"What why not?" Bella asked.

"Well, I was going to spend the holiday with Levi." 

"But you always spend it with Levi, You've spent your whole life with Levi!" Sasha exaggerated, while Bella nodded her head.

"Yeah, but this is different now," I told them.

Bella rolled her eyes and looked at Sasha, "No it isn't, the only thing now is your kissing, which I'm not sure I believe you weren't already doing. You're coming!" 

"I am not, Besides Levi won't be in town for long and I want to spend the rest of the mouth with him," I told her.

"Where is Levi going?" Ymir asked walking up. 

Just as she got there so did Levi; I guess they were done arguing.

"None of your business," Levi said walking next to me.

"Levi, can't you let F/n be free for the week?" Bella asked him.

"Why do you make it sound like i"m keeping her prisoner or something, F/n can do whatever she wants." 

"You got the go-ahead then, Christa you and Ymir in?" Sasha asked them.

"Going where?" Ymir asked.

They started explaining to Ymir what they were doing, and I took that moment to walk away without them following me. Levi caught on what I was trying to do and walked away with me. "What was all that about?" He asked.

"Just something Sasha was doing she wanted me to tag along, but I'd rather spend the break with you," I told him smiling. Levi clicked his tongue in response. I know that made him happy. I've noticed in school Levi isn't as affectionate when we're at home, but he'll still do little thing, like hold hands but nothing more than a peck on the cheek, Unless we're alone somewhere. Then he's all hands one. If you ask me, I think Levi likes doing stuff when we're out. Like getting caught excited him. Me, on the other hand, I'm fine with it. But I have no idea what I'd do if we got caught.

We continued to walk to until I heard someone say my name I groaned, why did it seem like everyone wanted to talk to me this morning? I looked behind us to see Erwin to my surprise. I haven't really talked to him since we broke up.

"What the hell does he want?" Levi said under his breath.

"Be nice," I told him in a hushed tone, so Erwin didn't hear. 

"Hey, F/n." Erwin said once he was close enough to us, "Levi," he added nodding at him.

Oh, God. I forgot the last time they were around each other Levi was punching him in the face. I really hope they can act civil now. "Er- what's up Erwin?" Erwin scratched the back of his head, and I couldn't help but notice the little blush that was on his face. Should I be scared of what he was about to say? 

"I was just wondering if we could talk, Er-just you F/n and me?" He asked. I could feel the anger railing up in Levi. 

"Erwin-" 

"And I was asking while you were around Levi so it wouldn't be weird or anything. I just wanted to talk to F/n it's nothing bad I promise." Erwin said putting his hands up. 

I looked at Levi, his expression wasn't clear at all, "Like hell, I'd let you talk to her alone, Let's go F/n." He said taking my hand and pulling me away.

"Levi," I stopped walking and looked back at Erwin who was still standing in earshot of us. "We don't know what it could be." 

"If it's from Erwin it's probably bullshit," Levi said. 

"Let me just hear him out," I told him letting his hand go and walking back to Erwin, "Okay, talk." 

"Seriously?" Levi said out loud so I could hear him. 

"Just give me a sec," I told him.

Looking at him now, I could tell he was getting angry or at least irritated by his eyebrows. I sighed he's so dramatic, "Okay Erwin now isn't a good time, but shoot me a text." I told him and then left to catch up with Levi who had now started to walk away. 

"Levi!" I called after him, but he didn't turn around. 

"Levi!" 

"Levi!" I called again. 

"F/n?" 

Why the hell does everyone want to talk to me this morning? I turned to see Petra this time. Okay so Erwin and Petra two people I haven't seen in forever, what are the chances? Ignoring the pit I was feeling in my stomach from letting Levi go, I smiled at Petra, "Hey." 

"I've been trying to get in touch with you for forever," She said hugging me. Okay, strange.

I awkwardly hugged her back, "Er, sorry. How are you doing? I haven't seen you in a while." 

Petra pulled away. "Yeah, it's been a lot going on." She had this hint of sadness in her voice. 

"You sure everything alright?" I asked her. Now that I think about it, since I hadn't seen her in a while, I did ask around for a little where she was at, and everyone seemed to think she was sick. I hope she was okay. 

"Just a lot of drama," She said sighing.

"Oh, well if you ever want to talk, you can always talk to me," I told her. I'm not trying to be close friends with her or anything, but she clearly needs someone to talk too. 

She smiled, "Really? Cause I was really hoping for that." 

"Ugh, Yeah-I mean I don't mind just let me know when you ever want to talk..." I told her trying to tail off, and so I could still make it to class on time.

"How about at lunch?" She said. 

"Sounds good," I told her. Then I started to make my way to my classroom finally with no one else asking me anything. 

I sat down beside Levi who was just on his phone. "Thanks for waiting on me jerk," I teased him.

Levi didn't say anything.

"Are you still ignoring me?" 

Nothing.

Levi is so childish. 

I didn't do anything wrong. Erwin is harmless mostly. I mean yeah, he can be a jerk, but for the most part, I think he only acts that way when he's showing off. I mean I would know I dated him.

"Levi it wasn't anything bad I'm sure, It was just Erwin," I told him. Levi glanced at me, but he gave me this dirty look. 

Okay, so he was pissed off at me.

I sat back in my chair. There's no used trying to talk to him now. It's not often Levi get angry, Or at least that I see him angry. What do I do now? 

"F/n explain to Furlan that Purple is not a good color on me!" Bella said walking into the classroom and sitting down in front of me while Furlan slowly following her. 

"Huh?" 

"Furlan is trying to make our Prom colors Purple! Purple is gross. I say we go with Green." She told me.

I frowned, "Why are you asking me? Can't you two come up with something on your own?" 

"You give good advice." Furlan added. "Anyways I like purple." 

"And I like green," Bella told him.

"Why don't you do both colors then?" I asked them.

"No." 

"No." They both said. 

God, they are weird. 

"I don't know do a different color then," I told them.

"But what?" Furlan asked.

I sighed, "Gold?" 

They both seemed to think about it for a moment.

"Rose gold!" They both said together agreeing.

Like I said, weird. 

They both started to talk to each other again. I looked over at Levi to see if he had anything to put in, but he just moved his head from looking at me when I faced him. So mature.

"What about you two? Figure out what color you're wearing to prom?" Furlan asked us.

"We don't know yet," I answered them. We still hadn't decided on a color, not like Levi was ever being any help with that anyway.

"Are you two arguing or something?" Bella asked.

"Yes how'd you know?" I answered her. Looking over at Levi again who was still ignoring all of us now.

"Well, Levi isn't saying anything." Bella said.

"Cause Levi is a big baby," I said while still looking at Levi. He just kept ignoring me.

I rolled my eyes and went to look at the board; I don't get why he's angry. All I did was talk to Erwin. It wasn't anything bad. It was just Erwin. I wish he'd get over his problem with him. I mean I'm with him! Levi should know Erwin doesn't mean anything to me like that. He should know that he's the only one I want. 

I glanced back at Levi. He's so annoying, with his stupid cute face. I'm not going to say sorry either. He needs to just get over it.

Levi Pov

The class was over, and F/n had already headed out of class. I was actually going to say something to her now, but she had already left. 

I hope this isn't her way of saying she's angry at me. Cause I didn't do anything, and she knows it. She's the one who wants to talk and hang out with fuckface Erwin. The nerve of him, trying to talk to her. I don't care what he has to say to her, it's all bullshit if you ask me, and I don't know how she doesn't see it. Nothing good had ever come from them being together. He tried to rape her; he spread rumors about her. He was the worst. I just don't get her. I don't want to think that she likes him or anything, but how can I not when every time it's a choice between him and me she seems to pick him. 

I just don't get F/n sometimes.

It's been a while since we've really argued. For the most part, if we get into it, it's over something stupid, and we're kissing five minutes later. But this just really pissed me off, and I didn't want to say anything I'd regret so I didn't say anything. But now I'm ready to talk, and she's nowhere to be seen. 

I was looking for her, but I couldn't find her anywhere. Where did she run off too? 

"Hey, Levi." Furlan said walking next to me, "What's the deal with you and F/n?" 

"Nothing," I told him.

"Okay, anyway I heard Reineris having a party you two going?" He asked me.

"Tch, no," I answered him. There was no way we'd go to a party after what happened the last time. Beside I leave in a few more days, and we're spending Thanksgiving together. "Where the hell did she go?" I asked getting frustrated. I was at her locker, and she still wasn't here. 

"Beats me, you leaving now?" Furlan asked me.

"No. I don't know." Seriously where did she take off too? 

"You'll see her at home, won't you? Ya know I didn't want to say anything before, but you do spend a lot of time with F/n. I mean I get it you love her and stuff, but don't you think you need a breather or something? If not you two will just get tired of each other." 

"Tch, I don't spend all my time with her. It's nothing different than how we've always been." I told him. 

"Yeah, but your dating now," Furlan said.

"If I wanted your opinion I'd ask you." I snapped at him.

Furlan put his hands up, "I was just trying to help." 

"Where no one asked you," 

"Okay, so this is touchy for you-" 

"Do you think F/n really liked Erwin?" I cut Furlan off asking him the question that had been on my mind since we saw him this morning.

Furlan frowned, "I don't know- I mean I don't think so, why are you asking?" 

I shook my head and started heading outside. I couldn't find her; we'd just talk when she gets home.

"Did something happen with Erwin?" Furlan asked following me.

"No, I mean he was trying to talk to him earlier, and she was letting him, I just don't get it. Why does she would do that? He's shit. She shouldn't want anything to do with him." I told him leaning on my car. 

Furlan laughed a little, and I glared at him, there wasn't anything funny about this.

"You just sound jealous if you ask me," He said shaking his head. 

"I'm not jealous." 

"You are though," he said.

"Tch, I don't know why I thought you could answer me straight." I went ahead and got in my car and left. 

I'm not jealous. 

I mean why would I be? F/n is with me...I'll admit seeing her talk to him made me angry, but I was angry because of what he did to her, and she was talking to him. That's why I was angry...Maybe it was because I was jealous...And I took it out on her when I should have just went off on Erwin. Now she's most likely pissed at me.

I sighed, I was being kind of a jerk to F/n for ignoring. I bet she's pissed. I'd better make it up, but the least she could do is explain why she wants to talk to him after all he did. That's it I just need to talk to her.

So before going home, I'll get her something, she likes fries. I'll get her fries. And we'll talk. We don't need to be arguing anyway I'll be leaving soon, and I don't want to leave with her upset with me about anything.

~~Later~~

I sat at home waiting for her to come over, or even show a sign that she was home but it was starting to get late in the afternoon. And I hadn't even heard from her. Not even when I texted to see what she wanted a ride after school. She still can't be pissed at me can she? 

Just then I finally saw her light come on in her room. 

About time. I got up from my bed and walked over to my window. I don't care if she doesn't want to talk to me or not we're talking. Like I said I'm not leaving town and she's pissed off at me. 

F/n's window was open and I went ahead and saw she was facing her door leaning against it. 

"F/n?" I called out to her; She didn't respond.

"Tch," I sat down against her window, "I bought you I'm sorry fries, but you got here a million years too late, so I ate them, so they didn't get cold." 

F/n didn't say anything.

"Are you still pissed at me? I said I was sorry." I told her.

Just then I could hear the sounds of sobs coming from F/n. 

Was she crying?

I walked over to her turning her around, and her eyes were red, and her face had traces of tears running down it. What the hell happened?

"What happened? Why are you crying?" I asked her.

But that only made her cry more. 

"F/n I can't help you if you don't tell me what happened," I told her. I needed to know what was going on. Who made her cry so I can show them how that's was a bad Idea. 

"I-Levi," F/n started to sob more.

"Goddamn it, tell me!" 

"Petra." F/n cried. 

Petra? What about her? 

"She was pregnant."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter!!
> 
> Cats out of the bag now lol Like a lot of you guys guessed Petra was preggers lol also FYI I had been playing this point for a very long time. 
> 
> But now the real question is what does this mean for reader and Levi? Will they make it? Can they get over it? Was the child Even Levi's? What will F/n do now? All that and more in the next chapter!! 
> 
> xoxo


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woot-woot knew chapter!!
> 
> DISCORD LINK: https://discord.gg/S6FChAQ
> 
> PLAYLIST: https://open.spotify.com/album/3cADvHRdKniF9ELCn1zbGH
> 
> Copy and Paste :)

Your Pov

~~Ealier~~

"You're what?" I asked Petra, not believing what she had just told me.

"Well, more like was." She answered looking away.

I shook my head, "Explain this to me again." 

After school I somehow found myself sitting alone on the steps with Petra outside of the building talking. But until just now everything had been fine, I mean I could tell something was wrong with her but then she just dropped this on me. 

Petra sighed, "I know this is weird, and I don't even know why I'm telling you. I mean I know why," She looked at me sincerely, "I don't have anyone else to talk too, my mom hates me. I bearly have any friends, at least not any close ones. Everything has been turning into shit. And well, I know you're nice and listen if anything...I just needed someone to talk to about this..." She trailed off.

I tried to be polite about this, "Yeah, no problem...It's just...You're pregnant? When did you know-I mean like-" 

"Don't be made, okay?" She said.

Why would I be mad? I thought dreading the answer.

"It was a little while before I broke up with Levi..." She answered.

I blanked out. Was she saying what I think she was saying?

"You mean Levi-" 

"He didn't know, and like I said I was..." Petra looked away, "I had an abortion." 

"What-" 

"I know it was wrong. And I should have maybe talked to him about it. But I just couldn't have a child right now. You have to understand I have things I want to do; I'm not even out of high school I couldn't take care of a whole other person," Petra started crying. "But now my mom hates me, hell I hate myself." 

I couldn't just sit here in shock; I should do what I can to make her feel better, I moved and hugged her. She's been going through a lot. And alone. I mean this was the whole reason she's been seeming kind of weird these last few weeks. 

"I'm sure your mom doesn't hate you," I told her. "And sometimes these things happen what matters is you're still here, and you can still live." I had no idea what I was saying to her. I don't even know what to say to anyone in this type of situation. I was in just as much shock as she was if you asked me. I can't believe it. 

Realization started to wash over me, "So is this why you broke up with Levi?" I didn't want to make her feel any worst, but I had to know, "Why didn't you just tell him? Levi...He should know-" 

Petra looked down, "Yeah it is. And, I can't ruin his life knowing telling him what happened-" 

"But Levi should know, you shouldn't have to do this alone," I can't believe what I'm saying. Even more, I can't believe Levi. Why wasn't he careful? Doesn't he know better? This is just as much his fault as it is hers. 

Petra was holding herself, "I just didn't want him to know, and get angry, Besides the two of you belong together I don't want-" 

"Petra this has nothing to do with me, and Levi isn't that type of person if he knew I know Levi would do whatever he can to-" 

"You- you just can't tell him," Petra said cutting me off.

"But-" 

"He can't know, you can't tell anyone," Petra told me. Why not? 

"I know it's wrong of me, but I really want just to be done with all this," She said crying into her hands now. 

I mean it's not my place to tell her what to do, and if she really doesn't want to tell Levi, then there's nothing I can do..."Alright." 

Petra looked at me, "I'm sorry F/n. I know you can Levi are dating...and I know this might be a lot...and it's wrong of me to beg you not to say anything, But you were the only one I thought would listen and not judge me." 

"It's fine," I told her. "I'm just glad you're okay...You are okay right?" 

She nodded, "Well, I do feel much better..." She started to wipe her face, "It's just been crazy, my mom thinks I'm some slut now, I didn't tell her it was Levi...I just said it was some guy at school and I didn't know who it was." 

Why would she do that? "Wouldn't it had been easier to just tell the truth? Like I said Levi isn't the type of person to get angry about this kind of thing, I mean I'm sure he'd be frustrated, but there's no way he'd mad at you. And his mom, I've known her my whole life they both would do whatever they could-" 

"It's over now though," Petra said, then she sighed, "There isn't any need for all that anymore..." 

I didn't say anything else. Petra had made how she felt clear, plus I didn't know what else to say. So we sat in silence for a while.

Just then some random guy just happened to walk were Petra and I was sitting. He seemed a little surprised to see us there, he scratted the back of his head, "You two alright?" 

Petra didn't notice him, so she jumped, "Oh, yeah we're fine." She answered him getting up. She turned to me, "Er-I'll talk to you later?" 

I nodded, and she took her bag and walked away.

I sat there. 

"Um, you okay there?" The guy asked again.

I pulled my fingers through my hair shaking my head, "Sure." I got up then and started to walk away. 

What the hell...

What am I supposed to do now? 

I saw Levi had texted me, but I didn't answer. What am I supposed to say to Levi now? I know he could have had a kid...And I can't tell him. What will that do to him? What was he thinking? What was she thinking? Damn it! Out of all the people, she could have told she told me? Why? I groaned this is insane...

Levi...he was with Petra and got her pregnant...Why was he even having sex with her...I mean did he really like her when they were together? Like I know he loves me, but what would bring him to do that when they were together...I mean I didn't have sex with Erwin when I was dating him...because I was still in love with Levi...and it just wouldn't have been right. 

But he was able to with her, unprotected I might add. And if she had kept it then what? Would he still be with her? Would Levi leave me to be with her...and actually have a family of his own? I could bearly stomach the thought. Not being able to be with Levi, because he's with someone else. That's like my worst nightmare, hell it was the worst when they were together; just imagine if a kid was involved in it. I'd die. 

I ended up walking all the way home. I saw Levi's car sitting there, so he was home. I shook my head; I can't see him now though. I was already on the verge of tears. I just needed to be alone right now. Because when it comes down to it. Levi liked Petra...if I had stayed out of the picture Petra probably wouldn't have even got the abortion...so in a way, it's my fault...

Once I had made it to my room, I leaned against my door. I was so exhausted. Thank god, my mom wasn't home yet. I feel like at this point if anyone said anything to me I might start crying even harder then I had already started crying. 

Because when it comes down to it, this whole situation was shit, and now I can't even tell Levi the truth, what type of girlfriend-no what type of friend doesn't tell their best friend something this serious?

"F/n?" 

I heard my name called out; I didn't even realize Levi had come in here. He's the last person I want to see right now. I didn't answer him; I just ignored him. I didn't know what to say to him. 

Levi had started to say something else to me, but I wasn't listening. I just still didn't answer him. It was just so much, Levi in his heart is a sweet person, if it came down to it I know he would leave me to be with Petra that's just the way he is. I know because he would think that would be something his dad would do, and Levi tries so hard to be everything his dad isn't, and if that meant leaving me, and thinking he's doing the right thing by being with her, he would do it. I don't even think he'd have to think about it long. 

And that terrified me.

Levi leaving me? I could throw up it was so upsetting. I couldn't even hold in my cries.

Suddenly Levi walked over to me and turned me around to look at him holding up my face, "What happened? Why are you crying?" He asked me.

But I only cried more. 

"F/n I can't help you if you don't tell me what happened," He said. But I'm not supposed to tell him. But what if he finds out another way and finds out I lied to him, he'd hate me!

"I-Levi," I tried to talk but it was just so much. Levi not being in my life, he was everything to me, nothing could be worse.

"Goddamn it, tell me!"

"Petra." I cried.

I know I shouldn't, but I can't lie to him. He should know, she should be the one to tell him, but it's just too much for me to keep in right now, she should have told someone else. 

"She was pregnant," I answered him.

Levi Pov

~~Preasnt~~

I stared at F/n. 

"What?" I asked her. 

F/n fell to her knees, shaking her head and crying harder now, "Just don't leave me." 

I couldn't wrap my head what she was saying, "Petra was pregnant?" 

F/n sob nodding her head, "But she got rid of it, It's all my fault." 

What she was saying wasn't coming off clear, Is she saying I was the-no, there was no way. 

I was down on my knees with F/n. I don't know all the ends and outs, but I need to be with F/n. I need to calm her down. So I picked her up and laid her down on her bed while she held my shirt tighter and tighter like she was trying to keep me from leaving. 

I want to know everything, but I'm not about to get a clear answer from F/n. So I just held her closer. I kissed her forehead, "I'm not going anywhere." 

F/n only cried more. 

I hate seeing her like this, but I just gotta let this one ride out. When she's done, we'll talk.

 

Your Pov

I woke up with a massive headache. 

I groaned sitting up, looking over at Levi who was still laying their sleep. He's so pretty. I yawned and started to stretch; we were in my room. What even happened yesterday? I started to wonder, Or at least last night.

Then I remembered what happened yesterday. 

I snapped my head looking back at Levi. 

I told him...shit. 

And I wasn't supposed to; If Petra found out, she would hate me. I wasn't supposed to let Levi know what happened, and the first chance I get I tell him everything? What was wrong with me?

"You wanna talk about yesterday?" I heard a voice say behind me.

Levi was up?

I didn't turn to him. I just focused on my hands. 

"Not really," I answered him.

"F/n," Levi said. I felt him sitting up. Levi took on on my hands, "You have to tell me F/n." 

"Just don't get mad," I told him. It was too late to back out now; I had to tell him everything. "Petra told me she got pregnant when the two of you are together, but she got an abortion...she didn't want to tell you, I wasn't supposed to tell you..." I didn't look at Levi.

I had no idea how he would react. 

He didn't say anything for a while. What was he thinking? Was he going to leave me now?

"Did she say why she didn't say anything to me?" 

"She didn't want you two be angry at her," I answered him.

Levi sighed, "Shit."

"Levi I'm sorry if I wasn't here, then she might have kept it-" 

"F/n you didn't do anything wrong this was me," Levi said cutting me off. "I- shit, I wasn't thinking. I have to talk to her," 

"Levi she'd hate me if she found out I told you, she's already been through enough," I told him.

"So I'm just supposed to pretend this didn't happen?" He snapped.

I looked away from him. I know it's wrong but why couldn't he? She seems like that's what she's trying to do. 

"Fuck," Levi breathed out. 

So he was angry, But I still don't know what he's going to do now.

"What are you going to do?" I asked him.

"I don't fucking know; I mean what is there to do? Tell her I'm sorry? Then what?" Levi said. I could tell he was growing more and more frustrated as he thought about it. 

"Do you think-" I didn't want to say it, what if I'd just be giving him ideas, but still it's the right thing to do espchally if he did like her...I mean Levi- it's that-Just because I knew Levi all my life and we've been friends doesn't mean he's mine. Like what if he really did like her..."Did you love her too?" 

"What?" 

I felt a lump in my throat; I knew I was about to start crying again, "I know it's selfish of me to ask, but it's fine if you still having feelings for her and want to go back I understand-" 

"F/n no," Levi said cutting me off, I looked at him feeling hopeful. Levi pulled me into his arms, "This is fucked up I know, but I'm not leaving you." Levi told me. I felt a wash of relief over me, but that didn't stop me from letting some tears out, I don't know if they were happy or sad.

"I don't' love anyone but you F/n," He told me.

"But why did you have sex with her?" I couldn't help but ask him that. I was still frustrated about that, "I didn't have sex with Erwin...why'd you if you didn't love her." 

"I'm an idiot, that's why. I didn't, and I don't love her, or anyone else just you F/n," Levi said holding me tighter. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have never been with her, this is my fault, but we can get through this," I moved and wrapped my arms around him hugging him. 

"Promise?" 

"I promise." 

Levi Pov

It's been about almost a week since F/n told me about Petra.

I still think about it, but at the end of the day, I can't do anything to change what happened. It's fucked I know, but it's just the way things are plus F/n begged me not to talk to Petra about it. Even though it goes against what I really want to do, which goes against everything I stand for but, F/n just seemed really stressed out about it. So I won't do anything, at least for now.

It doesn't change how much it makes me feel like a jerk about it. I know I could have treated Petra better if I had then maybe she would have told me what was going on. I wish I could have been there for her she shouldn't have had to go through any of that alone. The best thing I can do now though is just move on and learn from this. 

"F/n are you helping or are you just in here distracting Levi?" My mom asked standing in my doorway. 

F/n had been dancing to some song while I was packing to leave. I honestly had stopped paying attention to her a while ago. "Oh hey, Kuchel!" F/n said smiling, "Of course I'm helping, I'm the entertainment," She joked.

My mom rolled her eyes, "Finish up, (moms name) and I are almost done cooking." Then she left leaving us alone.

"You are alright right?" She asked. 

"Yeah, thanks for the help," I told her sarcastically.

F/n stuck her tongue out at me. 

It took a day or two, but F/n's gone back to the same old her, which I didn't mind. Seeing her stress over this whole thing just made me feel worse it would have never happened if I had just told her how I felt years ago. But I'm glad she seems to be moving on. 

That is the only thing we can do now. 

"What am I going to do while you're gone?" F/n said moving, so she was standing over with me and started playing with my hair. 

"Stay in the house all day," I joked with her.

"I know right; I'm so boring," she said.

It was soothing feeling her fingers in my hair, "It won't be long." 

"Don't say that," She said tugging my hair, "You'll get the part, They wouldn't go through all this trouble if you weren't; just go there and do your best." 

"Tsk, sure whatever," I told her. 

She hit me, "I'm serious." 

I tilted my head up to look at her, "Why do you want me to leave so bad?" 

F/n lent down and kissed me, "I want your dreams to come true." 

She pulled back, and I smiled at her, "they already have-" 

"Oh my God, you two are beyond annoying," Mikasa said out loud making both of us look at her standing in my doorway.

"You said they were bad Mikasa, but I didn't know they were this bad," Eren who was also standing there added. 

"Jaeger, what are you doing here?" F/n asked.

"It's Thanksgiving; mom said he could be over," Mikasa answered.

"I didn't know you were so lovely dovely," Eren called himself teasing me. 

"Tch, if you want your front teeth I suggest you get away from me," I told him. 

F/n hit me, "Stop being so mean," Then she looked over at them, "Yeah but get lost." 

Eren rolled his eyes and left, I swear he's annoying. He's a nice kid, but annoying.

"You two are the worst." Mikasa said watching Eren walk away, "Anyway they said get downstairs." Then Mikasa started to follow behind Eren.

"Food is ready, and ya girl is hungry," F/n started to walk away.

"Hold up," I told her.

"Come on Levi, the food smells great, and I want to eat." She whined.

"Tch," I stood up off the floor. And walked over to her closing my door.

"Levi, what are you doing?" She asked.

I've been wanting to do this for a while now, and with what happened the other and how I know she was feeling made me want to do it more, but it just wasn't the right time. But since she's been acting normal again and I wanted to do this before I leave in a few days, so I think this might be the best time.

I need her to know how serious I am about her.

I reached into my pocket, "I got you something," I told her.

F/n smiled, "You didn't have to get me anything." 

"I know," I moved closer to her, so I was standing over her, "I love you F/n." 

"I love you too," She beamed.

"And I know sometimes, I'm a dick, and I do stupid shit, but I need you to know that nothing will ever change how I feel about you," I grabbed her hand, pulling out a ring I had been saving up for.

F/n eyes went wide, "Levi-" 

"I'm going to marry you one day (First and last name) This is just something until then," I said putting the ring on her finger. 

F/n was smiling so wide, "I can't wait until that day," then she pulled me closer and kissed me. 

God, I was in love with her. F/n was the love of my life. And nothing will ever change that; I love everything about her. Even after all that shit we just went through nothing will change that. And in a way I was happier, just knowing we went through all that just a few days ago, and now we're here.

I feel like we can get through anything. 

I know I can as along as she's with me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> That ended on a happy note. 
> 
> Reader and Levi seem to still be doing alright despite everything going on so that's nice, I wonder what will happen next chapter (Not really I already know lol) 
> 
> To answer your question, about if this story will have a happy ending or not the truth is I don't really want to answer that because I feel like it will take away from the story and I'd feel like I'd be spoiling it for some people who might not want that answer just yet, BUT if you really really need to know just ask me in the discord in the spoiler channel and I'll answer it.
> 
> However, I will say this story honestly isn't even close to being done. Like there is so much more that's going to happen. A lot of feels still in the works, some fluff some angst some smut- I mean what's a good story without some adventure right? 
> 
> Till the next chapter!
> 
> p.s.I've been leaving hints about this story and how it will play out a little everywhere i.e. the playlist, tags, just lots of foreshowing here and there just some Food for thought~~
> 
> xoxo


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter yay! 
> 
> Discord Link: https://discord.gg/S6FChAQ
> 
> Playlist LInk!: https://open.spotify.com/user/1258003038/playlist/2kBd98ZbURnhuH4T68ukRt

Your Pov

I laid on my bed looking at the ring Levi gave me. 

It's so beautiful. 

I smiled to myself. He said we're going to get married. I was beaming; I can't believe he would say something like that! And I can't wait...Me and Levi. Me, F/n Ackerman! God, I could scream! Me and him forever! Living in a house just us, me and my best friend! What will our wedding be like? I mean I don't need to have a big wedding, although it would be fun, my mom there; his mom, Mikasa all our friends, Hell, even my dad walking me down the aisle. 

Being married to Levi, I bet it will be great, and what about children? I wonder how many he wants? I shook my head; my thoughts were everywhere God, I can't wait till he gets back. I can't wait to just hold him close again.

He's such an idiot though; why would he give me this and leave? I want to be around him. I want to see him, I want to hold him, but he's in L.A. now. He left last night, and it's the afternoon now, But it feels like I've been waiting forever for him Already. It's just so annoying. I didn't think it would be this bad, and it's only been a few hours. I miss him. I want Levi! He hasn't even called yet. I mean he did say he'd call me as soon as he could, but again this is Levi, he's probably out there doing his own thing, like setting up his room or maybe he's in an important meeting? Maybe he found out he already got the part? 

I shook my head, who knows what he's doing, I just need to calm down.

Just then I heard someone knocking on my door then my mom walked in, "Hey," 

"Mom, you're supposed to wait till I say come in, or I'm okay or something," I told her groaning.

She just rolled her eyes, "Well, I figured since Levi isn't here it would be fine." 

I didn't respond to her, making her laugh out loud. That's when I noticed she was dressed pretty nice, "So what are you about to do tonight?" I asked her.

My mom smiled, "Oh so you noticed." She then did a little twirl. I raised my eyebrow, what is this all about?

"I got myself a date tonight," She beamed.

What? "Seriously? I didn't even know you were talking to anyone." 

"Naturally you don't have to know everything I'm doing." She told me.

I nodded, "Well do you like him?" 

"Enough to go on a date yes." She answered.

"Does dad know?" I asked. Not that he had to know or if it even had anything to do with him, I mean I knew him to go out with women since they've divorced. 

"No, I didn't tell him, the two of you don't have to know everything I do." My mom answered.

I just nodded again, "Well have fun," I was happy for her it had been a while since she's been out on her own and not with Kuchel or something, "Don't do anything I wouldn't do," I told her smiling.

"Speaking of things you would do, what are you up to tonight?" She asked. 

"Nothing, I think I'll just go to bed early I am waiting on Levi to call me though," I told her. 

"You can't just stay up here in your room all while Levi's gone you know?" She said putting her hands on her hips.

"Why not?" 

My mom laughed out loud, "Because, you have a life outside of Levi. God, the two of you are so attached to each other; it's unhealthy." 

"It is not, and we are not," I told her playfully pouting.

"You are too, go out sometimes, I'd hate for you to be bored the whole time he's gone, go hang with your girlfriends sometimes okay?" 

I sighed, she did have a point. I didn't want to stay in the house every single day, "Okay mom I will, not tonight though," 

"That's fine," She said smiling at me, "I'll see you later okay? Don't burn down my house." 

"Will do!" I joked back, "And have fun tonight!" I called after her as she closed my door. 

I sighed laying back down on my bed. 

It's nice my mom is going out, she's out there living her life, doing her own thing...and she's not with my dad, That's really good. And man is she right; I should be out here doing my own thing too, I can't just wait on Levi my whole life...

I looked back at my ring. It sure does suck though...Why'd he have to leave? I shook my head, cause he has to live his life too. I'm sure he's having fun...That's it. Mom is right, I need to go out to, so tomorrow I'll do something fun, I'll call Bella I'm sure she'd want to do something. Either her or Ymir, maybe Sasha. They all should be back from that cabin already; maybe we can all have a girl day or something.

Just then my phone started to buzz. I jumped up so quick to get it that it fell on the floor, "Shit," I snapped trying to pick it up, once I did I saw it was Levi, but then my phone was acting stupid taking forever to open up. Why was this happening now! God, I hate my phone! Finally, I got to answer it. 

"Levi!" I called out loud.

"I do need my ear, idiot." He said.

I smiled, again it's only been a few hours, but it feels like it's been forever. "I've missed you jerk," 

"Yeah, me too." 

"You've missed yourself?" I teased him.

"You know what I meant." 

I laughed, "How has everything? Have you done your audition yet? What did they say? Is beautiful down there? Is it-" 

"Shut up and let me answer you," He said cutting me off. "Yeah, I've already done the audition, "That's why I didn't call you earlier, I was busy getting ready." 

"Did you do your best? Did you get the part? What is the show anyway?" I asked him.

"Actually when I went in and met with her guy and the rest of the people they said I pretty much already had it, and after I audition they said I had it for sure, they must have really liked me." 

"Levi! That's amazing!" I yelled. "I'm so happy for you!" 

"F/n my ear." 

"I don't care about your ear I'm happy for you! Have you told your mom yet? What's next! This is so exciting!" 

"Tch, I was going to call her after I talked to you, And I'll be here for another week or so. I'll meet the rest of the cast tomorrow; then we'll get a tour of the set the next day after that well do some table reads and stuff, from there well get into some recording. I should be back before you know it." 

"That sound so exciting, Are you having fun? Do you like it?" 

"I wouldn't be here if I didn't," he answered back. 

"Well, remember if I didn't convince you too, you'd be home still, so you owe me," I teased him.

"I'll have to remember to pay you back when I see you again." 

"Don't worry I'll remind you if you forget." 

"Tch, I'm sure I won't." He teased back, "What have you been up to today?" 

"Nothing, just waiting on you to come calling- or what wanna hear something crazy? My mom went out on a date, and it wasn't with my dad," I told him.

"That's new," He said sounding a little surprised.

"I know right but other than that everything has been the same." 

"Well, I haven't even been gone a day," he said.

"True, I am going out tomorrow though, Imma try to hang out with Ymir or someone," I told him.

"Sounds like fun," He said plainly. 

"Don't sound so excited," I said sarcastically.

"Tch, well whatever you do don't hang around Erwin," Levi told me.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked him.

"It means what I just said, I know he'll try something, so don't give him a chance." 

"Levi, Erwin isn't even that bad." 

"F/n-" Levi started to talk, but I cut him off.

"I'm a big girl I'll be okay, and anyway I'll only see him in school, it's not like he'd try anything bad there." 

Levi didn't say anything for a while, "Alright, just be careful...I don't trust him." 

I smiled, even all these miles away from each other Levi still cares. He's so sweet. "I will," I told him.

"Thank you," Levi said.

"I think I'm going to go ahead and go to bed," Levi told me. 

"Yeah, I was going to do the same after we got done talking," I told him.

We both went quiet for a while. 

"It's hard to go to bed without you here," I told him. 

"I know the feeling," he said back.

"Stay on the phone till I fall asleep?" 

"Tch, our batteries will die." 

I sighed, "I don't care I just want to feel close to you." 

"Since when have you been this needed? I thought you'd be fine all by yourself?" He teased me.

"I've never said that," I told him in a matter of fact tone, "Besides, if anything being with you made me this needed. You spoil me."

"Only cause I can." He said, "And when the times come I'll spoil you all the time. Plus if this whole thing works out, I'll be rich and set then you can have anything you want." 

I laughed, "You know the only thing I want is you."

Levi didn't say anything for a while. And that was fine; it was just nice to know he was there. But then I heard a snore.

"Levi?" I called out.

No response. 

"Levi!" I called out again.

"What?" He snapped.

"You were snoring," I told him.

"Tch, I don't snore." 

I started to laugh, "Just go to sleep Levi, I'm sure you have a busy day tomorrow." He must have already been tired if he's falling asleep on me like this.

"No," he told me, "I'm staying on the phone with you." 

"I thought you were worried about the battery?" 

I heard Levi yawn, "It's fine, just go to bed."

"Sure thing," I said yawning myself.

I was pretty sleepy myself, but I do have to admit not having Levi here to cuddle with made it a bit harder to fall asleep. I guess I have to just act like how I used to before we started dating. Which sucks. I sighed it will only be for a little while. In a week or two he'll be back. I listened closely to my phone, and I could hear Levi breathing lightly. It's going to be a rough two weeks for sure without him, but I just know it will be worth it when I see him again. 

I'll jump with kissed that's for sure.

~Later~

"So Levi is famous now?" Sasha and Bella both asked me as we walked away from my locker.

"No," I answered them.

"But you said he's out in L.A. Filming a tv show," Bella said.

"I mean that doesn't mean he's famous," I told them, "He's just filming, the show hasn't even had a preview yet." 

"Is he the main star?" Bella asked.

"I think so, Levi honestly hasn't talked to me much about it," I answered.

"Then what the hell do the two of you walk about then?" Sasha asked, "Cause I'd want to know what he's doing 24/7 while he's away. I mean he's in L.A. of all places are you not worried?" 

"What would I be worried about?" 

"Other girls duh?" Sasha said like it was obvious. 

"Other girls?" I asked.

Bella started to shake her head, "Hold on Sasha, big bro isn't like that." 

"Ugh, he's a guy isn't he?" Sasha said to her.

"Yes, but this is Levi," Bella said, but Sasha shook her head.

"Levi or not, L.A. girls are supposed to be crazy hot, and he's in L.A. right now, and I bet he's working with hot girls. All I'm saying is Levi is still a guy, and I won't feel so safe." 

Everything Sasha was saying had just started dawning on me, how had I not ever thought of that? Levi working with hot girls? And now that I really think about it, what if he works with a girl...and they kiss and stuff for the show...I mean he does the same thing for the plays he's been in...But still, you hear celebrities fall in love while they work together all the time. And I'm way out here...What if Levi forgets all about me. How did I never think about any of this? I'm such an idiot. What if he hasn't told me much about the show because he does work with another girl- and he likes her! Oh, my gosh! How could I be this dumb?

"F/n," Bella spoke up, "Look at me." 

I looked at her, I could tell she was looking concerned, "It's Levi were talking about here, you and I both know he'd never do that. He's in love with you. He's always been." 

"Oh, gosh F/n I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to make you worry that much," Sasha said. 

I shook my head, Bella is right, what was I thinking? This is Levi after all, I mean he gave me a ring! A promise ring, He loves me. He wouldn't leave me like that. "Ugh, it's fine." 

"Are you sure?" They both asked. "You looked pretty worried there for a minute," Bella asked.

"No, I'm fine," I told them.

"Hey, F/n! Wassup!" Petra said walking up to me smiling. 

"Oh, hey Petra," I said smiling back. 

"I'll walk with you guys too your class," she said tagging along with Bella Sasha and me. 

Since Petra told me everything, she's been hanging out with me more. And it's not bad. I mean it's a bit awkward, but I get it. She needs someone to hang out with that knows what's going on with her, so I'm fine with it. Everyone needs a friend right? The only thing though is that I feel a bit bad since I did do the one thing she asked me not to do which was not to tell Levi the truth. But I just couldn't keep that from me. But as long as Levi doesn't talk to her about it, everything will be fine. 

And speaking of what Petra told me, Levi has been handling it pretty well. I don't know why I thought we'd break up because of it. I guess I just over think about stuff sometimes. If anything I think it made our relationship stronger, I wasn't supposed to tell him what happened, but in a way, I was still glad I did; who knows how pissed off Levi would have been at me if I kept something like that from him. 

"I think that's Erwin standing by our classroom door?" Sasha said out loud making me pay attention to what was going on.

"What does he want?" Bella said out loud. Once we got close enough, he saw us walking toward him and waved. 

"Who is he waving at?" Bella asked.

"I think F/n," Petra answered. 

"For why?" I said out loud. Oh, I forgot he did want to talk to me way back before school had stopped for the break. I wonder what it's about? 

"Hey, Erwin," I said when I was close enough to him. 

"How was your break?" He asked me. 

"Oh, it was okay," I told him about keeping it simple. I had to remember not to talk to him for too long, otherwise, I'm sure somehow it will get back to Levi, and he'd have a whole horse about it. 

"Do you mind if I talk to you for just a sec?" He asked me.

I looked back to see Bella and Sasha were standing inside the door waiting on me, and Petra standing right beside me. "I don't know; I should really be getting to class." 

"It will only be a minute, Besides I don't think I can get to you anytime Levi is around, he hounds you like a dog," Erwin said. I heard Petra snicker a little. 

I snapped back at her; she shrugged, "It's true." 

I shook my head looking back at Erwin, "He does not, and what is it?" 

"Can we talk alone?" He asked looking back at Petra. 

I sighed rolling my eyes, "Fine." I started to walk away, "You had better make this fast." I don't know why but I was starting to get annoyed. 

Once we were a little further from everyone else Erwin stopped and sighed, he almost looked a bit worried. But I still had to make this quick.

"Okay, what is it, Smith?" 

"Wow, you even started to talk like him too," He joked.

"If you don't start talking I'm walking away," I told him. It was bad enough I was talking to him here. I already promised Levi I'd be careful when it came to Erwin. Not that I really believe he'd do anything. I mean Erwin is a sweet person by nature, sure he's an asshole now and then, but so is Levi. I don't see how they're all that much different personality wise.

Erwin sighed again, "I just wanted to say I was sorry." 

"Huh?" I asked dumbly what was he talking about?

Erwin looked away, "The way we broke- Well the way you broke up with me...It was cause I was being an idiot. And I've honestly been feeling really crappy about it...I never really apologize for it." 

"Seriously?" I asked. Honestly, I hadn't really thought about it since I've been dating Levi. I mean I didn't care anymore, I had other things to worry about.

"Yeah, you're not still mad about it are you?" He asked.

I almost laughed out loud, "Oh, God no. It's water under the bridge." 

"Really?" 

"I mean yeah I was pissed off back then, but I've cooled off. I figured you were just bragging to your friends and got carried away. I mean it sucks but why hold a grudge right?" I told him honestly.

Erwin looked a little taken back, "I don't know I had thought you'd be a little angrier." 

"It's fine," I told him smiling.

"Wow, you're um- you're really cool F/n," Erwin said blushing a little. 

"I've been told." I smiled at him. I don't know why I thought whatever he had to say to me would be bad. I mean it is Erwin after all. 

"Levi is really lucky..." Erwin trailed off, "I'm dumb for treating you the way i did." He said.

I nodded, "Sure are." I started laughing then, "I'm just teasing you, but thank you for apologizing." 

Erwin smiled at me, "No problem, ugh thanks for listening." 

I just smiled back, "Well, I gotta get to class now." And I turned to walk away. 

That wasn't bad at all. 

Erwin is a cool guy. Plus it's pretty funny teasing him like that. I bet Levi lose it if he saw us just now though. I sighed, I'm still going to have to tell him. Specking of Levi. I wonder what he's up too anyway. 

I pulled out my phone to text him and as soon as I did I saw he just sent me a text. I smiled to myself. We even think about each other at the same time. I opened it to see what it said and immedently smiled. 

-I'll be home Saturday

My Levi's coming back home!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Fun stuff planned for the next chapter ;)
> 
> xoxo


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter and there's smut! So there's that :)
> 
> Playlist link: https://open.spotify.com/user/1258003038/playlist/2kBd98ZbURnhuH4T68ukRt
> 
> Discord link:https://discord.gg/S6FChAQ

Your Pov

"What are you getting Levi for his birthday?" I asked Mikasa as we were looking around in a store at the mall.

She looked at me plainly, "Nothing." 

I gasped, "Why not? He's your brother!" 

"So? Why do I have to get him anything?" She said looking through the clothes.

"I just thought you would, since he's been working hard out there," I told her.

"What are you getting him?" She asked me.

I looked away, "Er, I don't know. I was hoping to get an idea from talking to you, but you're no help." 

Mikasa smiled, God she can be mean. 

I sighed, "it's just hard now since we started dating now, I don't know what to get him..." 

"Sounds like a personal problem." 

I glared at her; I swear her and Levi are just alike. "What did you get for Eren?" 

Mikasa's face went red. "I didn't get anything for him either!" 

I couldn't help but laugh, "Aw you are so cute. You don't have to lie to me what'd you get him?" 

"None of your business." She snapped and walked away.

I was still chuckling if she's that defensive I won't press on it. So I started to walk Kuchel to mess with her, "What are you getting your favorite son for his birthday?" 

Kuchel looked at me and smiled, "I was getting him so new clothes, I know the weather is so much different up there." 

"That's nice," I told her. I can't get Levi clothes though. It has to be something nice, something I know he'd like...Something that means I put a lot of thought into it. "What do you think I should get him?" I went ahead and asked Kuchel.

She stopped looking through the clothes like she was thinking. "What did you get him last year?" 

I shrugged thinking, "I got him a phone case, but it was different then we weren't dating..." 

"Oh, that's cute, " Kuchel turned to my mom who was isle away from us. "She's trying to find a gift for Levi." 

My mom just chucked, "You two are so silly." 

"It's not funny," I told them getting annoyed, "I'm trying to be a good girlfriend." 

"If I'm honest F/n, I think whatever you get him he'll happy," Kuchel said. 

"You're overthinking again sweetie," My mom said.

I groaned, "Maybe, but still...I want it to be perfect." I looked down at the ring on my finger. Levi was so thoughtful to get this for me; I just want to do the same for him. 

That's when it hit me; he got me the ring, I could get him one! I'll be right back! I told them running out of the store. I needed to go to a jewelry store. It's perfect! Why didn't I think it before? This will be the perfect thing; I'll get him something simple. Now that I think about it, I don't know if he'll like wearing a ring...Oh, I'll get him a chain too! Aw, it's going to be so cute. 

I was walking to the store when I just happened to see Bella walking into a store. Oh, I guess she was doing last minute shopping too. I called after her, but she didn't hear me. I shook my head and followed her in. But that's when I realized what store she was in. It was a lingerie store! Omg! As so as I knew where I was, I felt out of place. What was she doing here? I shook my head; I bet she didn't think anyone would see her in here. 

I stood there for a second until I saw where she was looking. Ha, she was caught in the act! I sneaked behind her. She was looking in some pretty risque stuff. "Shopping for Furlan I see."

Bella practically jumped to the roof. 

She turned around red as an apple, "F/n? What are you? I wasn't! I'm not-" 

I was laughing my ass off, "That was priceless." 

Bella was breathing heavy, "You are such an asshole." 

"I am not," I laughed, "You're just guilty." 

Bella's face was still red, "I'm not I was just looking." 

"For?" 

"For none of your business." 

I was still laughing, "It's okay." I eyed her up and down, "Planning on having some fun with Furlan for Christmas?" 

"You are the worst," Bella said looking down. But then she looked back up and me, "Wait? Why are you in here? Shopping for Levi? Planning on surprising him tonight when he gets back or something?" She asked trying to turn this back at me.

I started to feel a bit nervous at the thought of that, "Actually no, I was just following you in here." 

"Yeah right," She said crossing her arms.

"It's the truth!" 

"Do you two need any help with anything?" 

Bella and I both jumped up at the voice sales lady who just popped up.

Neither one of us could look at the lady, "Er- we're fine." I told her. 

The lady walked away leaving Bella standing me still standing there. "We're so lame." Bella finally said. 

I could only nod. 

"But since you're here you can help me," Bella said sounding like herself again.

"What?" 

"Help me find something sexy! I wanted to do something random that Furlan would never expect! I'm sure Levi would like something like that too," She said wiggling her eyebrows.

"Oh, my gosh." I said shaking my head, "This is insane." 

"We're here aren't we?" 

"Fine," I told her, "You better keep this between just the two of us." 

Bella laughed, "I wouldn't dream of telling anyone about this." 

"Good," I said looking through the things that I guess could be considered clothes, they were just so revealing. I really hope Levi likes this. 

Levi Pov

"Are you excited to be going back home?" Hailie asked me.

She was a girl I had been working with that was in the show, and we were both at the airport waiting for our flight. "Yeah," I told her. 

I just felt her smiling at me, "I swear you are so reserved Levi, I'll get you out of your shell." 

"Tch, I don't have a shell." 

"Do too, the whole time, it's just been work and no play, you that makes Jack a dull boy. And you my friend are a dull boy." She joked.

I didn't say anything. 

"Are you and your family doing anything fun for Christmas? Mines is, we go out sledding every year. It's a lot of fun." 

"No," I answered her.

She just sighed. I wasn't really paying attention to her; I was texting F/n, who was taking forever to respond. The last thing she said was she was shopping at the mall with my mom and her's and Mikasa. I don't know why they wait so long to shop; they should have done this way earlier than this.

"Joe, tell Levi to stop being a stick in the mud," Hailie said to Joe who came to sit down next to us. He was another person that was on the show with me.

He just laughed, "Levi's alright he just misses his family, You should here him in his sleep, always calling out for F/n." He joked. 

I groaned, I shared a room with Joe, He wasn't annoying or anything. But it was certainly annoying sharing a room. Esapally when he brings up shit like that.

"Awe who is F/n? And why is this my first time hearing about her?" Hailie asked.

"None of your business." 

"It's his girlfriend," Joe answered her, "He talks to her when he thinks I'm asleep or in the shower, they're super in love." 

"Tch," I clicked my tongue, I take that back he is annoying.

"That is so cute! I bet you're really a big softy! Are you spending the holiday with her? Do you miss her?" 

"God, you both are irritating." 

"Aw, admit it, you love us!" She beamed at me. 

I just rolled my eyes, they both almost reminded me of Furlan and Bella. 

So far everyone on set seemed to get along just fine. Most of them lived in the L.A. area. Just Joe, Hailie and I weren't from here. And for the most part, this has been pretty fun. I liked the show it had a good plot. It wasn't anything I would watch though, maybe F/n. I don't know who's he react though...I do kind of a lot of kissing in this show. I mean it's nothing serious, but I don't know how F/n would feel about it. And I'm sure it will be okay. It's not like I like them. I just wanted to talk to her about it in person.

But I can't lie and say I'm not excited to see her. It's been three weeks since I've seen her. And I'm ready to hold her again. This is the longest I've gone without seeing her. Even before when she wouldn't talk to me, I'd still see her around. This is completely different. I couldn't just walk next door and see her. It was strange. But it was over for now. Just a few more hours, I'll be with F/n again.

"Earth to Levi!" Hailie yelled at me, "Your flight is boarding now!" 

I shook my head focusing on what was going on, finally. I went ahead and got up and started to walk away.

"See you Levi" Joe waved at me. 

"Yeah, see you later." 

"Bye Levi" Hailie yelled after him, "If it doesn't work out with you and this F/n, I'm totally available!" 

I didn't respond to her. She jokes too much. And I'm sure F/n wouldn't think it's funny at all. She's not the jealous type, but I'm sure she still wouldn't like it. I'll probably talk to her about this whole thing a day before I leave, that way she won't be mad for long, at least I hope. 

I pulled out my phone, so I could shoot her text before I got on the plane.

-I'll see you soon getting on the plane now.

Your Pov

I sat in the waiting area fiddling with my ring. 

Levi should be here any minute now. God, I can't wait. 

I wonder how he'll react to what I have planned? I got all hot and bothered thinking about it. It was Bella's idea...I groaned putting my face in my hands; I can't believe I'm going to try this-this is insane I bet Levi will laugh. 

But if I want to do this, I guess tonight is the best chance I'll get Mikasa Is going to be at Erens. And our moms are going out tonight...We should be done by then. I bet this will be so much easier to do when we're married and live in the house alone. I laughed out loud at that. Levi and me in a house of own. 

I sighed and looked over to the door Levi should be coming through, that's when I noticed people were walking out. That should be his fight! I got up to get closer, Levi should be coming out at any moment. I don't even know what I'll do when I see him. I could feel my heart beating faster and faster. I'm just so excited, It's been so long! I haven't seen him in forever; I feel like this has been the longest I've gone without seeing him right next door. I don't know how long this will work though. 

I mean now that I really think about it, will he go to school out there now? And if he does then what? I wish I could be out there with him when he goes again, but I doubt I'll be able to do that. Maybe I can find a school to go to out there, but how will I pay for it?

"Tch, I'd thought I'd get a bigger welcome back home than this." 

My eyes went wide at the voice behind me. I jumped turning around, "Levi!" I immediately hugged him

He was standing there, in the flesh! How did I miss him coming? 

I was holding him as tight as I could. I didn't want to let go ever. I could feel myself getting ready to cry. 

"I've missed you so much!" 

Levi pulled back to look at me, then kissed me. It was just so perfect! He was perfect. Being in his arms after these three long weeks, it almost felt worth it. Levi was my everything, and I was back in his arms. 

After what felt like wasn't nearly long enough we pulled away from each other. Levi looked down at me, "Are you crying." 

I smothered my face in his shirt, "So? I've missed you." 

Levi just wrapped his arms around me again, "I've missed you too." 

After awhile Levi pulled away, "I'm surprised my mom isn't here, I told her I'd be home tonight." 

"Apparently they decided tonight they wanted to go out tonight, some concert. In other words-" 

"We have the house alone tonight?" Levi finished for me.

I smiled holding his hand and started to lead him out of the airport and to my car, "And I have a surprise for you."

God, I hope I wouldn't look like an idiot.

Levi Pov

F/n had been acting a bit strange since we've gotten back home. 

She was normal, but after I asked her what surprised she had for me, she started to act weird. I bet it's something stupid; she does get silly sometimes. But I'm sure I'll still like it. It is F/n after all, like her even when she's a dumbass.

I was getting out of the shower and walked back to my room. I was only wearing my boxer, Obviously, we were having sex tonight since we got the time alone, and it was just me and her home. I want to show her just how much I missed her. I walked into my room and saw she wasn't in there. "F/n?" 

"Levi?" I heard her call out from my closet.

I put my hand on my forehead, why the hell was she in my closet? "What are you doing." 

"Okay don't laugh," she said.

"F/n you're acking like a weirdo." 

"I am not, and don't laugh. Now get out and close the door and don't walk in until I tell you too." She demanded.

"No," I told her.

"Levi."

"What?" 

"Get out please," she asked.

"Tch, this better not be anything stupid," I said walking out of my room. What is she planning? What could she have done? Something she thinks I'd laugh at? Did she get a tattoo? Or a piercing? I shook my head; she wouldn't...would she? I looked at my door she was taking a minute. 

"Hurry up!" I called at her.

"Hold on!" She yelled sounding angry.

What the hell is she doing? I can only wonder right now.

"Okay, you can open the door." 

"Do I even want too?" 

"Oh my gosh Levi open the damn door." She snapped. 

I laughed a little she's so dramatic. I opened the door and saw her laying in my bed, but quickly noticed what she was wearing, or what she wasn't wearing the point was I don't think I've seen her in anything this sexy before. 

She had on just a bra and underwear, but they were all red and made with lace. F/n's hair was pulled up, and I could tell she had a bit of makeup on. I stood there staring. This is the hottest I've ever seen her dress. This was way different than her just being in a swimsuit. She had dressed this way to be sexy on purpose. 

"So you like it?" She said getting up and walking over to me.

I swallowed looking her up and down. I couldn't tear my eyes away from her she looked so damn sexy. 

"I'll take that as a yes," She said taking my hand moving further into my room and closing the door. "Sit down." 

I obeyed her while watching her walk back to me. She was close enough so I could touch her; I moved my hands to feel her ass, but she slapped them away. I glared at her, "What was that for-" 

"I'm in control tonight, and I saw no touching." 

"I can't touch you?" 

"Not till I'm done," She told me walking away to my dresser picking up her phone turning on some music.

I leaned back a little, "What are you doing?" 

"I'm dancing for you," She answered swaying her hips to the beat. 

It was hypnotizing. I couldn't look away I didn't even know she could be this sexy. F/ walked back closer and closer to me dancing. She turned around giving me a perfect look at her ass. I moved my hand closer to her again, but she slapped it away again. Shit. Why was she being such a tease? Hadn't I waited long enough?

"You gotta play by the rules Levi," She teased.

I just clicked my tongue. I watched her ass move against me. I was just getting harder watching her. This was torture. "F/n," I pleaded with her.

F/n started to laugh turning around, so she was straddling me now, "Someone is really impatient." F/n's face was hovering right over me, just a little bit closer I could kiss her.

"How long are you gonna play this game?" I asked her.

"Till I get you begging." She said with a sly smile on her face while she was still grinding on me.

"Well, you're going to have to work harder for that," I teased back.

"Is that so?" She said F/n reached behind her back and pulled her bra off. "Does this work for you?" 

I felt a hitch in my throat, but I didn't want to give in just yet, "Try a bit harder." 

F/n nodded her head, "Alright." She started to move down till she was on her knees in fount of me. She looked back up at me, and without looking away, she took my member out of my boxers and started to slowly jerk me off. I tilted my head back. Shit, what's gotten into her? I could feel her mouth close to my cock making me look at her, but she was just teasing me. She wasn't going to do anything. 

"Come on F/n." 

"What's the magic word?" 

"Stop playing," I told her.

"You're the only one playing here," She said back.

Fuck, this getting harder and harder. F/n moved up sp her breast was rubbing against my cock now, "Please F/n," the words slipped out my mouth. 

She stopped, and with a triumph look on her face she said, "I win." Then F/n stood up and straddled me again this time kissing me. I took full advantage now. This had to mean this little game she was playing as over. So I grabbed her ass again. God, she felt amazing against me. I couldn't wait anymore I wanted her-No I needed her. Now.

Your Pov

I couldn't help but do a little cheer in my head, the sexy dancing and clothes worked. But that thought was quickly swept out of my head when Levi flipped me over, so he was on top of me. 

I guess it really worked. Levi tried his hardest not to give in, but at the end of the day, I was just a little too much for him. Levi was attacking my neck right now, god I missed this. I just wanted to pull him closer. Levi backed up a bit and looked down at me waiting for permission; biting my lip and nodded my head I was telling him that it was okay. It was still something that was so sweet to me about the way he never just really goes for it. He always waits to know I'm ready. 

Bringing me back to focus was Levi's cock rubbing against my clit. I was breathing heavy. I wish he'd hurried up already, but just as I thought that Levi started to push himself in. Fuck it was the greatest feeling ever. And Levi wasn't going slow at all. His thurst were deep and fast, not that I minded it's been forever since we've seen each other, and I think I've already done enough teasing for us tonight.

Levi started to slow down a bit. I think he was close to coming, but I was already too. I could feel my toes curling up. Just a little bit more. 

"Fuck, F/n" Levi was breathing in my ear, "Say my name." 

He wanted me to do what? "Levi," I said saying what he wanted me too. That was so unlike him. 

"Louder," He said grunting. 

Shit, why was he doing this, I couldn't focus, "Levi!" I gasped louder as he pushed himself into me deeper and harder. I was so close, just a little more and I could feel myself coming undone by him.

"Fucking scream it," he demanded it hitting that right spot.

"Levi!" I screamed just when I felt all the relief wash over me. Started to jerk just as I was coming down from the high. He must have just came too. We both laid there for a moment, recovering for from it.

I felt Levi get up out of bed to do what I could only guess was get rid of the condom. Then after a moment he moved back in the bed pulling me into his arms. We didn't say anything for a while, both of us just enjoying a silent moment with each other. This was peaceful. We hadn't been able to just be next to each other in three weeks. I think we both just needed this. 

"I got you to scream my name," Levi said hiding his face in my neck and kissing.

"Only cause you told me too jerk," I snapped at him, feeling a bit embarrassed about it. Now that I think about it, the whole thing was kinda of embarrassing. "But at least you didn't laugh, so I guess I can give you that...And I got you to beg." 

"Tch, I wasn't begging. I was just humoring you," He said pulling away.

"Sound like you were begging to me," I teased back at him.

"I'll show you what begging is, that was only round one." 

I pulled away from him so I could get a better look at Levi, "Round one?" 

"I gotta make up for lost time," Levi said sitting up and kissing me on the lips. 

Making up for lost time huh? I don't think I mind that at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks a buch for reading!!
> 
> Reader and Levi are doing great; everything is so perfect for them, isn't it just lovely and so wholesome? Makes you wonder what could go wrong and we all know something is going to go wrong I just wonder what? (Well I don't I know what's going to go wrong lol) 
> 
> Like and comment on this chapter tell me if it was okay, and listen, guys, I'm always open to constructive criticism It helps me become a better writer and helps you guys have a better story to read so don't be afraid to tell me if I need to fix something all I ask is you just be respectful about it :) And more so I'd love some feedback about the smut, I personally don't think I'm all that good at it, so tell me something I should fix I want to know! 
> 
> Anyways ya girl is sleepy and is about to hit the hay. You all are awesome for reading this fic and I can never say thank you enough! So I hope you all have a good day/week/year
> 
> till the next chapter!
> 
> xoxo


	23. Chapter 23

Your Pov

"You got your things?" My mom asked me walking to the door.

"Omg, mom it's not that big of a deal, they are literally right next door," I groaned at her. 

"Watch your tone please," She told me, "Just bring the mac over." 

"Yes, ma'am." 

It was Christmas morning, and surprisingly I wasn't already with Levi. Instead, I had been home helping my mom make dinner. And now we were bringing it over Kuchel's house. It was a thing we've been doing since before I can even remember. Kuchel and my mom would switch who's house we'd celebrate at every year, and this year it's over hers. 

When I think about it it's kinda bittersweet. This is the last year we'll be together before Levi, and I graduate, after that, I have no idea what we're going to do after that. I really don't want to think about it, but I know it's just coming closer and closer. 

I sighed. Not today though. Maybe tomorrow.

My mom and I got to Kuchel's house. With Levi opening the door. He was cute; he was wearing his lazy clothes as he likes to call them. Just had his sweatpants and T-shirt on. "Morning," I beamed at him.

Levi just nodded at his taking the food that my mom had in her hands. "Thanks, Levi," My mom told him. She walked into the living room meeting Kuchel by the tree. I heard them talking, but I went into the kitchen with Levi. 

"Happy birthday," I told him, putting the mac down and kissing his cheek.

Levi only moaned out a responds, "I guess someone is sleepy." I teased him.

"I don't know why they still do this, it's not like we're kids anymore." He said.

I just laughed, "Just enjoy it. They like doing this for us. Plus Mikasa is still pretty young."

"I am not," Mikasa said walking into the kitchen.

"Merry Christmas to you too," I jokingly told her. 

She just growled at me. I saw she was still in her night clothes too. They really are brother and sister. I laughed to myself.

"You guys have all day to lay in bed. Let's open some gifts!" I said clapping my hands loud.

Levi and Mikasa both jumped. Making me laugh again. "Come on!"

I walked into the living room with my mom and Kuchel sitting down.

"Okay, who's got the first gift?" Kuchel asked. 

"Let me go first." My mom said picking up the gift that had her name on it. 

"It says it's from Kuchel," She smiled opening it. It was a nice shirt. "Ooh, you saw me looking at this the other day," She told her, and they both laughed. I looked over at Levi who didn't look that interested.

I nudged him. He just eyed me; I mouthed for him to be nice, and he just rolled his eyes at me. He was so sour lately. Well, only for right now. Last night we were talking, and from what I can tell he just wants to lay in bed all day with me, and not deal with anyone. But life isn't like that. We got work to do, I mean not really but we can't spend our whole lives in bed. Plus it's his birthday; I want him to have fun.

Levi only sighed loudly getting up, "I'll be right back." 

We watched Levi walk out of the room.

Kuchel laughed shaking her head, "I don't know how I got such sweet morning children." 

My mom laughed, "They act just like you did." 

"They do not." 

"They do too," My mom and Kuchel went back and forth.

"I'm opening my gift next," Mikasa said getting a package from under the tree, "It's from F/n." 

I smiled. It was kinda hard to find a gift for Mikasa, but I know she likes wearing scarfs, so I got her a new one. She opened it and looked at it, "Well this is cute," She said looking over it. "Thanks." 

I just nodded my head at her, "You're welcome." 

"Oi, here," Levi said walking back into the living room. He had three gifts in his hands and passed one to each of us. 

"Aw, I didn't think you'd get me anything," My mom joked with him.

Levi just sat back down now laying his head in lap, "I got them back in L.A." 

Mikasa, mom, and Kuchel opened there's. He got them a snow globe, a T-shirt, and A hat all with L.A. logos. 

"Nice," Mikasa said.

"Thank you, sweetie," Kuchel told him smiling.

"This is nice, what did you get F/n?" My mom asked.

I opened mines which were a little box, and it was a small necklace with a pretty diamond on the end of it. I smiled looking at it. "This is so pretty, Levi." I bent my head down and kissed him on the cheek. Levi tried to act cold, but he cares so much. 

"That is pretty," Mom said looking at the neckless, and I held it in my hand.

"I'm surprised you didn't get her a ring," Kuchel joked. 

"Tch, I already got her one," Levi said plainly.

My breath hitched. I've never told my mom about the promise ring he gave me. I had no idea how she would react! Of if she would tell my dad, I wanted to ease her into that conversation. Why would he say that? God, did he have no chill sometimes.

"Oh?" My mom said raising her eyebrow, "You did now?" 

I looked down avoiding her gaze, "Yeah, a while ago." I held out my hand so she could see it. 

"Didn't think it would be a good idea to tell anyone?" Mikasa asked. I inwardly groaned, she's such a little sister sometimes. 

My mom sat back down, I could feel her and Kuchel's eyes on us. Levi didn't seem to care; I don't know why though. He knows how they overreact to stuff. I feel like they might say we're moving too fast or something. And I don't need that on my mind. Plus I don't think that we are. I know how I feel about Levi, and it's not going to change, Ever.

"You two really love each other, don't you?" Kuchel asked. 

I nodded looking down, "Yeah, Levi is everything to me." 

Levi didn't say anything. 

"Levi I'm serious, sit up." My mom told him. She used her serious voice too. Oh, God. This could only be bad or embarrassing most likely both. Levi sat up and was looking at our moms who were eyeing the both of us. Mikasa seemed to be enjoying this, sitting in the middle with this smirk on her face. I just held my breath waiting for what was coming next. 

"So what's up with the two of you? Levi, what are you're planning with F/n?" My mom asked. 

I could only frown, she knows we love each other, and that it's been forever. Why is she acting dumb now?

"I love F/n," Levi told them. I looked over at him, to see his whole posture changed, he looked just as serious as my mom. "I plan on marrying her one day, that's why I gave her a ring. F/n is everything to me. I plan on being with her forever. Nothing is going to change that." 

"And you F/n?" His mom asked me. 

I nodded my head again, "I feel the same way. I don't know what I'd do without Levi. He's one of the most important people in my life. I can't imagine my life without him. I mean he's my best friend, you guys know this." 

My mom just looked at him. Then she shrugged with a laugh, "Well, that's good for me." 

"Same here," Kuchel said.

"What?" 

Levi moved to lay his head back down on my lap. "What just happened?" I asked.

Kuchel and my mom started to talk to each other, while I sat here staring at them confused. "What just happened?" I asked louder. 

"You two just take of each other okay?" Kuchel said smiling at us.

"Er-" 

"I think you two are real sweethearts, and we've always known you two would end up together, even though it took you years to realize it yourselves," My mom said, "We just want the two of you to be happy and if it's with each other then great." 

Kuchel hummed in agreement, "And know, yes it's going to be some hard times but don't give up on each other. Be better then we were at our relationships. Okay?" 

"Tch, as if you had to tell me," Levi said under his breath.

I just smiled back at them. I guess this was their way of giving us their blessing. Not that I think we needed it, but it was still nice. I know I'll take care of Levi. And I know he has me. We'll be alright. I'm sure of it. And yeah we'll have our ups and downs, but that's life. I truly think we can be better than our parents. Levi and me, we just work. We always have and we always will.

I played with Levi's hair as I felt him falling asleep. I'll just give him his gift later; he must be really sleepy. I smiled, he's just a bum, and I love him so much.

Levi Pov

I was taking some dishes into the kitchen from our meal. By now I was pretty much awake, at least more then I was this morning. We're supposed to be going out, although I did say we didn't have to, but my mom insisted since it's my birthday that we go out and do something. 

So F/n and Mikasa were upstairs getting ready while I cleaned up with my mom and (Moms name). 

I sat the plates down next to the sink while (Moms name) was washing them. 

I was about to Leave out but she called after me, I turned to look at her, "Yeah?" 

"I was serious about what we were talking about earlier, with you and F/n," She told me.

Why was she bring this up again? I already told her my plans with F/n. I'm going to marry her. But I'm not going to protest; I'll just humor her, "Yes, I was serious too." 

Her mom sighed, "Listen, you know she's been through a lot, you both have. But with her father. Maybe she talks to you about things and not me," (moms name) Shook her head, "My point is I just want the two of you to take care of each other, like your mother said, be better than us." 

"I'll protect F/n," I told her mom. That's what I think she was getting at, "And I won't hurt her, ever." 

She smiled at me, "Don't make promises you can't keep, but at least do your best." She moved and hugged me. 

Once she pulled away I nodded at her and walked out of the kitchen. That was weird, but I might get why she's making a big deal about this now. Like F/n's mentioned a few times; this might be the last time we're all here likes this since we're about to graduate, and who knows what we're doing once we start college especially since I'm out in L.A. F/n will most likely go out there with me whenever she can. Or at least I hope we haven't really talked about it, but it would make sense. Or maybe they all could visit me out there. Who knows.

I got back to my room to see f/n was in there looking in my mirror.

"Ready?" She asked me.

"just about," I told her sitting down on my bed and noticing the package that was sitting there. F/n walked over to me, "It's your birthday slash Christmas present." 

I smiled at her it was a little box almost like the one I got her necklace in, "What is it?" 

She rolled her eyes, "Just open it." 

I went and opened it to see a ring on a necklace. It was silver and almost the same as the ring I got her. I looked back at F/n, and she was smiling widely at me. 

"It's my promise ring for you."

I looked back down at he dangling it from the chain.

"And so you don't lose it; I got the chain for you, you can wear it any way you like." She rambled. I just looked at her. "I thought you'd might like it, it's the thought really. I mean I'm just saying I promise to love you forever. I mean I'll always love you, and I want to be with you forever, it's my promise saying I want to marry you too one day...I mean having a family would be nice...with you...I" F/n sighed, "Would you just say if you like it or not!" 

I could only smile. I was teasing her; just seeing how long she would keep at it. It was cute to see her get more embarrassed as each word came out. I walked to her hugging her, "I love it." I have her a kiss, "And I love you too." 

F/n groaned in my shirt, "You are such an asshole." 

"I just like hearing you talk about how much you love me," I teased her. But I really did. I know how she feels, but hearing it was another thing. Her wanting to start a family....with me. It's insane, for the longest I never thought she'd feel the same way, and to finally know she does is everything for me. I want to spend the rest of my life with her, and I know I'll hate every second I'm not with her. 

~~Later~~

Your Pov

Tomrrow Levi's leaving back for L.A.

This little visit was nice, but I hated knowing he'll be gone even longer this next time. Although I should be grateful the next time he comes back it will be longer than this last time, so that's good.

Since this is his last day being home we decided to just spend the day inside, which I didn't mind. We played video games for a while, but then it ended it a make-out session. Levi even cooked him and me some lunch...which also ended in a makeout session. And now Levi was sitting here reading while playing in my hair as I scrolled through my phone. 

"So I was thinking pink and silver," I told him.

Levi just hummed, that pretty meant he wasn't listening. 

"Levi," I said in a more serious tone. 

"What?" 

"Prom, pink and sliver?" 

"Is that what you want?" 

I huffed out getting annoyed, "It's what we want not what I want." 

"I want whatever you want." He said looking at his book.

He was only getting under my skin more and more about this. "Well, I want brown and grey," I said trying to say the ugliest color combination I could think of. 

"If that's what you want," Levi said.

I threw a pillow at him.

Levi put his book down, "What?" 

"Be seriose!" I told him.

"Alright, alright," He sat up, "Black maybe?" 

"But you always wear black," I told him.

"Then you pick the colors." 

I sighed, "Okay Black and barbie pink." 

"Barbie pink?" He questioned.

"You know the cute pink." 

"I'm sure that's just pink," He said plainly.

"Why do you have to be such a pain?" I asked him. Why was he like this?

"Tch, you're more of a pain then I am." 

I rolled my eyes, "I am not." 

"Are too," He smirked.

Just then his phone started to ring, and as usual, he didn't move to answer it, so I went to answer it. It wasn't any number I recognized but then again Levi only had mine, Mikasa, and Kuchel's phones saved. 

"Levi's phone," I answered it in my professional voice, and Levi rolled his eyes at me making me laugh a little.

"Hia, Can I talk to Levi?" It was a girls voice, she didn't sound that older than me, but I didn't recognize her. 

"Who's calling?" 

"Oh, this is Hailie," She said. I frowned, I didn't know a Hailie. 

I looked at Levi and passed him his phone, "Hailie?" 

Levi's eyes went wide, and he took his phone, "What do you want?" He answered in an irritated voice.

I couldn't hear what she was saying, but Levi didn't look interested at all. "Fine," was all he said then he hung up. Levi tossed his phone away from him.

"Er- who was that?" I asked him.

"Just some girl from the show." 

"What did she want?" 

Levi went and laid back down, "Nothing," 

"Oh," was all I said. 

If Levi said it was nothing I shouldn't worry...although he hasn't mentioned a Hailie...and now that I think about it he hasn't actually mentioned anyone of anything about the show. I mean when I ask him stuff he answers, but never anything on his own. Kinda makes me wonder...I mean it really makes me think about what Sasha was talking to me about. He is down there with all these hot girls...I wonder if she's pretty.

I was sitting on the foot of his bed now, I know I should just ask him, but I can't seem to bring myself to do it. 

"Levi-" 

"F/n-" 

We both spoke at the same time.

"You go first," I told him.

Levi didn't make eye contact with me, "About the show, don't get mad." He told me. And I instantly felt a lump in my throat. What was he going to say? Is this about Sasha said? Or the girl? Was it something worst?

"It's a lot of kissing I do in it okay? I mean It's nothing serious, but it's a few implied sex scenes in it. I mean it is a tv show that comes on regular tv, so it's not that bad, but still, it's a lot." Levi scratched at his face, "I mean I should have told you earlier, but I didn't want you to get mad." 

"I'm not mad." I told him. I was looking down at my nails and fiddling with my fingers, "I mean it's just a show right?" 

Levi sat up and took my hands, "Yes, it's just a show." 

I looked him in the eyes, I have nothing to be worried about, Levi and love each other. I should know that. I mentally shook my head; I should know better than to be concerned about him liking someone else. What was wrong with me? "Of course I mean I've seen you kiss plenty of girls on stage, how should this be any different?" I told him smiling.

Levi looked at me like he was searching for some other reaction. I playfully hit him, "It's fine Levi, I get it. Thank you for telling me." 

Levi sighed, "I don't know why I thought you'd take that a little worst then that." 

"You should have more faith in your girlfriend then," I told him in a matter of fact tone.

"Tch, Maybe. But you can be such a crybaby sometimes I can never know when." He teased.

I rolled my eyes at him, "Jerk." 

"Crybaby." 

~~Later~~

Levi Pov

I was sitting in the lobby waiting to board my plane. F/n and my mom had both came to see me off. Mikasa was too busy with her friends as usual. 

"And don't go around talking to shady people. If it sounds like anything, I wouldn't do you don't do it. Don't go into any fishy ally ways with anyone; I don't care if you know them or not," My mother was lecturing me about stuff I should and shouldn't do while I'm in L.A. she has this same speech with me before I left the last time too. I wonder if this is going to be a habit of hers whenever I leave out.

"Don't go anywhere without anyone knowing where you're going. Don't do drugs, they seem like their fun, but I'd rather you do them here then in L.A. at least then I'd know if you became some advice and can help you. And don't ever pay for sex. You have a perfectly beautiful girlfriend right here at home; you get lonely just call her. F/n you'll answer when he calls right?" 

F/n was laughing, "Yes, I will answer if Levi calls." 

"Tch, I'm glad you think this is funny," I told her.

F/n was only laughing harder. "It is though." 

"Laugh all you want, but I'm serious," My mom told us both, "You do the wrong thing one time, and it's a slippery slope from there. Next, you're somewhere sucking dick for a piece of crack." 

F/n and I both started to laugh. That was actually funny. 

"I don't think it's ever soled as just one piece of crack," F/n laughed. 

"Have you ever had crack?" I asked her.

"No, and you don't need to try it." My mom said, trying not to break into a smile herself. 

My mom shook her head and started to get up, "Just remember what I said. I'll leave the two of you to say your goodbyes. Levi has a safe trip," She moved and hugged me. "You have fun up there, but not too much." 

I hugged her back, "I'll be fine." 

My mom pulled away smiling, "Okay, F/n I'll be outside when you're done." Then my mom walked out leaving me and F/n alone.

"Kuchel is the best," F/n said moving to lean her head on my shoulder, "I love her," 

"She loves you too." I told her.

"Just imagine if she were one of those moms I'd have to win over because she's crazy attracted to you," She joked.

"I'm sure you'd make her like you," I told her.

F/n giggled, "I'm sure, as long as I just don't suck dick for a crack." 

I shook my head laughing, "I'll miss you." 

"I shall miss you too my love," F/n said being dramatic. 

I rolled my eyes at her, "Stay out of trouble while I'm gone." 

"As if you had to tell me," She snorted, "But speaking of trouble I forgot to tell you I did end up talking to Erwin." 

I felt a little annoyed at the mention of Erwin name. "What about him?" 

"He just wanted to say sorry for being an ass, when we were together." She said like it was nothing.

"Tch, just leave him alone." 

"It's not like I'm following him around," She said, "But it fine Levi I don't want to argue." 

I sighed I didn't want to argue either, "Just be careful." 

"Yes, Levi I'll be careful, you be careful too." I could feel her starting to breathe heavy, "don't go sucking dick for a crack." 

we both started laughing again, I think we're going to be laughing about that for a while. I can't take my mom sometimes. "Call every day," F/n said once she started to calm down.

"Will do." 

Just then I heard my plane was boarding. I went ahead and got up. F/n hugged me from behind, "I love you," 

"I love you too," I told her turning around to kiss her again. 

"Next time we see each other it will be almost time for prom and graduation," she said. 

"Then off to college," I told her.

"Mmhmm," She hummed. 

I looked into F/n's eyes. I didn't want to leave her. I wanted to stay with her wrapped around me forever. I wish we could skip the years we have to wait and just be together. But that's not how life works. I kissed her again and slowly pulled away. 

"I'll call you as soon as I can." 

"And I'll be waiting." She smiled.

I sighed walking to the plane. It's just a mouth and a few weeks. 

"You and your girlfriend a very cute," An older lady said to me as I left the lobby.

I couldn't help but smile, even strangers knew how meant we were for each other. 

"Thanks."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Really hope you all enjoyed this chapter sorry it took so long to come out, my internet was out, and then I lost the whole thing before I could save it, and had to start over, but here it is! 
> 
> any predictions for the next chapter? I'm super interested to see if any of you can figure it out :)
> 
> Thanks again for reading
> 
> xoxo


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters?? within hours from each other? Crazy right? Also: 
> 
> !!!IT'S TIME FOR TEARS THIS HAS BEEN YOUR WARNING!!!

~~A few weeks later~~

Your Pov

"You and Levi are so cute," Bella said looking at the ring on my hand and showing it to Furlan. 

"Aren't they the cutest? When are you getting me a ring?" She asked him.

"Er- I don'-As soon as I can," Furlan said. 

I laughed he clearly didn't know how to answer that. 

Bella looked at him a smile, "You're so sweet." She kissed him on his cheek, "So sweet that I'm going to go get you some candy from the candy lady, for before we leave okay?" She jumped walking away, "You want anything F/n?" 

I shook my head, "Nah, I'm good." 

Bella just shrugged and walked away.

Once she was gone Furlan let out a breath, "Damn Levi." 

I laughed, "What?" 

"He's making the rest of us guys look bad, Why does he have to have the perfect relationship with you," He teased.

I snorted, "We do not have a perfect relationship." 

"Do too," Furlan insisted. 

I just smiled, "We do? Don't we?" 

This time Furlan snorted, "You're both asses, maybe that's why you get along." 

"Well, it's not my fault," I laughed.

"What's not your fault?" 

Furlan and I both looked over and saw Petra standing behind us as we were walking in the hallway.

"Oh, you know F/n and Levi's perfect relationship," Furlan told her. 

I kinda hesitated to look at Petra; I didn't really know how'd she take that, you know with her dating him before me and all and not to mention her getting pregnant. I mean I was still the only one who knew.

"Yeah, I kinda figured they were meant for each other," She said in a voice that I couldn't tell if she was hiding anything.

"Ha," Furlan was laughing again, "Everyone fucking knew you guys were going to date, even his ex-girlfriend." 

I just shook my head; I have to remember sometimes Furlan doesn't have a filter, at least when he's with just friends. But it was annoying I didn't want to have this conversation with Petra. It was strange, but it's not like I can tell him. So I just have to roll with it. I wonder if Petra feels weird about how this whole conversation is going? So I looked to see if I could tell what she was thinking.

"Yeah, I should have known better than to date a guy in love with his childhood best friend," She was laughing with Furlan.

Well, I guess not.

We had got outside, and Furlan and I stopped to wait on Bella, and Petra was still with us. 

"Hey, F/n I was wondering if you wanted to hang out tonight?" Petra asked me.

"Hang out?" 

"You know just a girls night?" 

"Ooo sounds fun," Bella butted in, "But I can't go, Furlan and I have ring shopping to do." 

I smiled at Bella, then I turned back to Petra, "I don't know, I think I might want to stay at home." 

"But you always stay home F/n, live a little. You can't stay at home and wait for Levi the whole time he's gone," Petra insisted.

I rolled my eyes, "I do not just stay and wait for him, okay. I have fun still." 

"Playing video games at home doesn't count," Bella interjected. 

"Did I not hang out with you and Sasha for a day when he was gone the last time?" 

Bella laughed, "You know I'm just teasing you." Bella hugged me, "Go out Petra you just want to have fun right?" 

Petra smiled, "Yeah, I just wanted to go to the mall and the movies, since my mom doesn't mind me going out in like forever and I figured I wanted to go with a friend," 

Well, when she puts it like that...I mean I know her mom was being really uptight so this must be her first time she's able to get out the house in like fiveever. I sighed, "Sure, It might be fun." 

"Awesome!" Petra yelled hugging me, "I'll pick you up later?" 

"I could just drive and meet you there," I told her.

"That works!" Petra seemed so happy, "I'll see you there around 6?" 

"Sounds like a plan." After that Petra waved at Bella and Furlan who watched the whole thing. Once she was gone, they both turned to me.

"I don't know I always thought she would be a little meaner, but Petra is really cool," Bella said.

Furlan nodded, "I mean with her dating Levi, and them breaking up and him going with you I thought she'd end up hating you." 

I laughed a little, "Well, I felt the same for a while, but she's cool. I mean I think she's been through a lot. But she's just a positive person." 

"Hmm, I can see that," Furlan said. "I still don't know why Levi would ever date her though." 

"Same," Bella added.

I just shook my head at them, "You guys are perfect for each other." 

"I know." 

"I know." 

They both said at the same time. I sighed shaking my head again, "On that note. I'll see you later." I told them walking in a different direction. 

"You parked over there?" Furlan asked me.

"Yeah, why?" I asked. I had started parking in a different spot. It was actually the spot where Petra and I had talked that one day. It was a lot of shade over there, and I hated it when my car would get hot from the sun, so I started parking over here. I don't know why I never thought to park over here before. 

"That's where all the...well questionable people hang out," Furlan said. 

"That means?" I asked him.

"He means that were all the potheads hang out," Bella said for him.

I snorted, "And since when are we afraid of potheads?" 

"I'm not saying be afraid of them I'm just saying don't talk to them," Furlan said. 

I rolled my eyes laughing, "You're acting an afterschool special." I told them walking away. I hadn't had any problems with anyone this long I don't think they'd start now. 

I walked over there to see only one guy leaning on his car that happened to be parked by mine. As a matter of fact, I think I've seen the guy before. I didn't say anything to him as I walked over to my door to open it. I simply smiled at him.

"You're that girl from the other day aren't you?" He asked me.

I raised my eyebrow why was he talking to me. But again I wasn't worried or anything; it was just strange. "Er- I'm not sure depends on what day you're talking about." 

"The day with that other girl, you both looked like you were crying," he said. I felt a little embarrassed. 

"It was a difficult day..." I told him.

He shook his head. Looking at him he was kinda cute. I'm not sure if I've seen him around school or not, he kinda looked like a more handsome Eren. "It's a shame, a face as pretty as yours should be crying." He told me.

I couldn't help but yelp out a laugh, "Sorry, but um...Thank you." 

The guy just smiled, yeah he was cute. But he wasn't anywhere as cute as Levi. "No problem. I hope to see you around more." 

I just gave him a shy smiled back, he didn't give off the creepy vibe, but still, it was strange. I went ahead and got in my car and took off; I didn't want it to be in this awkward situation anymore. 

~~Later

I was home getting ready for my night out with Petra. 

It should be fun, a little girls night, shopping in the mall and a movie. Sounds like a good time, too me. 

"You're all dressed up," I looked over at my door that was opened and say my mom who was also dressed up nice.

"Same to you," I told her. 

My mom smiled spending around, "I'm going on another date with that guy again." 

"Ooo so the last few have been nice? When do I get to meet him?" I asked her.

My mom seemed really happy, "Soon, I think I'll bring him over sometime this week coming up. Now, where is it you're going?" She asked me.

I shrugged, "Just going out with Petra." 

"Petra?" My mom asked.

"Levi's Ex-girlfriend," I informed her.

"That doesn't sound painfully awkward," She laughed.

"It's actually not. She's really cool, and she just needs a friend right now."

My mom didn't say anything for a moment, "Doesn't sound right." 

I looked away from the mirror and back at my mom, "Huh?" 

"It just doesn't sound right that girl might be up to something," She told me in her serious voice.

"She's actually really sweet, I don't think she has any bad intentions," I told my mom honestly. Petra had been through too much; I'm sure the last thing she wants to do is something to ruin my life.

My mom put her hands up, "You might be right, I don't know just be careful okay?"

"Always mom," I smiled at her. Just then my phone started to ring. 

"It must be Levi," My mom said in a sarcastic tone. 

I stuck my tongue out at her, "So what if it is." 

She shook her head and started to walk away, "Tell him I said hi, And you have a good night. Don't stay out too late; your dad might be by to drop some stuff off by the way."

"Kk," I yelled at her while answering my phone, "Hola Levi," 

"Furlan told me, you're going to be a drug dealer soon," Levi said.

I laughed, "Did he now? Yeah, I've started a whole drug ring while you've been away for these past two weeks." 

"Tch, I knew you'd get into something while I was gone." 

Levi and I both laughed, "How's your day been?" I asked him.

"Fine," Levi answered sounding tired, "I've done a lot of interviews today. The first preview should be coming out in a few days." 

"This sounds so exciting. I think I'll have a whole viewing party for it." 

"Tch, don't." 

I giggled, "I'm totally doing it now," 

"Such a pain," He groaned. 

"And you love me." 

"I do, what are you up to tonight?" 

"I'm hanging out with Petra at the mall nothing too fun, you?" 

"Who's idea was that? And I'm just going to stay inside and sleep I've been up since four this morning." Levi told me.

"God, that easier for you. I'm surprised you haven't gotten kicked off the show for being a diva," I joked with him. "And it was hers she can finally go out, so I'm just going to hang with her." 

"Tch, just be careful." 

I couldn't help but laugh, "Why is everyone saying be careful? It's just Petra if she wanted an issue with me, she wouldn't have told me her biggest secret. I think me and her are just really friends." 

"It just sounds strange that's all, Anyway have a fun," He told.

I smiled to myself, "You know what? Just because you told me too, I will." 

"Tch, smart ass." 

"I love you too, anyway I'm about to leave I'll text when I get back home tonight okay?" 

"Love you too, and okay." Levi and I hung up after that. I was all ready to leave out now. 

I went ahead and walked out of my room and was making my way to the door. I passed my moms room to see she was putting on some of her last touches, "You look beautiful, have a good night! Keep your cookies in the cookie jar!" i teased her.

I heard her snort, "Have a good time F/n, love you." 

"Love you too." I called out walking out the door. 

I was making my way to my car when I saw my dad was in the driveway and getting out the car, "Hey, sweetie." He smiled. I guess he was in a good mood.

"Hia dad," I smiled back. 

"Where are you off too?" 

"Just hanging out with some friends. Mom's inside getting ready to leave out herself." 

He just nodded, "Oh, okay. You have fun." He told me. 

I just smiled back, nodding I feel like usual he'd make a big deal about this, but like I said he must be in a good mood. "Yeah, see you dad love you!" I called after him getting in my car and leaving out; it was going to be a good night.

Levi Pov

"So when am I going to get to see a pic of this girlfriend of yours?" Joe asked why I was laying on my bed. 

Why did he feel the need to talk to me? Especially about F/n, as if I'd answer. So I ignored him.

"Come one I'll talk to you about my girlfriend," He said.

"Tch, You don't have a girlfriend." 

"No, but I will soon. Imgain once this show airs the girls are going to be all over me," He said, "Now that I think about it, I feel kinda bad for you, You're stuck with a girlfriend when all the fangirls are going to want you." 

I started to ignore him again. I didn't care who wanted me. I belonged to F/n, and she belonged to me. 

"You know I heard Cira really likes you," He told me. Cira was the female lead in the show. She was the girl I seemed to have to make out with every other scene. Cira wasn't bad looking or anything, hell far from it. But she was annoying. Annoying one because she made it very known how she feels about me. Joe didn't have to tell me she had been crushing on me; she's told me enough herself. She was from L.A., and I'm guessing enough people have told her she's beautiful enough times she believes it and just flaunts it. 

She was really annoying in the interviews we did together, she kept trying to insinuate something was going on between us, but I kept shooting down. It was annoying, but I think she's the only downside about this whole show thing. Well, her and F/n not being here. 

She said she was hanging out with Petra, and I didn't really mind. It just sounds weird. I didn't know Petra liked F/n that much to want to hang with her, but hey I guess you never know. 

"Think about it, when this show comes out, I think it's going to do really well," Joe said dreamily. "All the girls, money, fame. What part are you excited about?" 

"I'm here for the money. I don't need anyone but F/n, and as far as fame I'm not really interested. I want to take care of my family." I answered him honestly.

"Sounds like you got everything figured out," Joe told me.

I smiled to myself, I did. I knew what I was going to do with my life. "Pretty much," I answered him.

Just then my phone started to ring, F/n shouldn't be back that soon? I looked at it to see it was my mom. Oh, I bet she's annoyed I didn't call her today. I have to remember to call her more. "Hey, Sorry for not-" 

"Levi?" My mom cut me off. He voice sounded heavy.

"What's wrong? I was starting to feel more a more concerned.

My mom started to speak again, but now it was clear she was crying, "It's an emergency I need you back here as soon as you can get here." 

Your Pov

The movie was pretty good. 

Petra and I had watched some funny movie, we had already gone shopping and that was fun. So far this night was great; I don't know what everyone was worried about, Petra's just a girl who wants to have fun. She's made some mistakes, and it wasn't even all on her either. She just wants to live a peaceful life. 

We were just walking out of the movie now leaving, "Thanks again for bring me out Petra." 

Petra smiled sipping her drink, "No problem. Thanks for coming with me, this is the most fun I've had in a while." 

"Well, You deserve it," I told her.

"Okay selfie time!" She said pulling out her phone and posing. We posed for a bit taking pictures. 

"Are you going to take our your phone?" She asked me.

I shook my head, "Nah, it was on low battery anyway, just tag me in those k?" 

"Sure thing," She said as she was posting them. 

We continued walking until I heard a familiar voice. 

"This is twice today," I looked behind us to see the guy that was by my car this after school.

"Oh, hey," I said to him.

"Fancy seeing you here..." He paused waiting for me to give him my name. I guess I hadn't learned his name yet either. 

"F/n," I told him.

He smiled, "F/n, cute. I'm Samuel by the way." He told me. He looked a bit distracted. 

"You know him?" Petra asked me. 

"Sorta?" I said, but it sounded more like a question, "Not really." 

Samuel just gave me a cute boyish smirk, "As much as I'd love to keep talking to you I have to go," He said. 

"Oh that, fine," I told him, but he didn't even stay long enough to listen to me say goodbye to him. He sure is a mysterious guy.

"He's kinda cute, does he go to our school?" Petra asked. 

I nodded, "I think so, he's strange though." 

"Strangely hot," She joked. 

I rolled my eyes, "Okay, girl I think it's about time we headed home." 

"I agree," She laughed, "Again thanks I know it's a bit weird since I was with Levi and all, but you're a really good friend." 

I hugged her this time, "What can I say I try." 

We were both outside now, "I'll see you at school?" 

I waved after her while walking to my car, "See you at school!" I went ahead and got in my car after putting my bags in. 

It really was a good night. I should go out more often. It's fun just hanging out with girls maybe next time I can get Bella and Sasha to come with us. Or even Ymir and Christa. They all seemed like they'd like that. Maybe for prom? Oh, that be great! The day of dance we all go out and get our stuff done. It would be so cute! 

Aw and Levi can go out with Furlan and his other guy friends...Does he even have any more guy friends? Maybe I can talk to him about having a heart to heart with Erwin. I snorted as if that would happen. Oh, well. I'm sure Levi will have a good time either way. At least I hope he does. I'm sure he'll be happy to know tonight went fine. Again he and my mom were worried about nothing. Petra is harmless. I almost wish I could have been friends with her before Leiv and her got together. I can't believe I used to think she was a bitch or something. 

I just wish hope she'll be okay, I sighed. I fell like I have a lot to think about Petra, Levi, school...what I'll do after school...Maybe I'll find somewhere to study in L.A. I bet Levi would like that. I've down great in school, and I have a few scholarships. So I'm sure I can pull in the money. If I have to, I can do some loans.

I was pulling up closer to my house, and I couldn't help but notice the red and blue lights coming from what looked like my street. I wonder who's house it is. I know there's that ancient lady Ms. Patterson. She's like 100 years old Levi always jokes saying it's any day now. I really hope she's okay though; she used to give Levi and me cookies when we were younger.

As I got closer though I could tell the lights weren't coming from Ms. Patterson's...They were coming from mine...

I pulled up as close as I could and parked and got out my car. I felt like my whole stomach was sunk in, what was going on? There was that yellow tape all around the kind you only see on tv..Never in real life. Police were everywhere. My breathing was getting more and heavier I needed to see someone I knew.

That's when my eyes landed on Kuchel. She was standing outside her house talking to some police officers, "Kuchel? What's going on? Where is my mom?" I asked running up to her.

Kuchel saw me, and for the first time in a very long time she looked a total mess, She reached and pulled me in a hug. I was so confused about what was happening? "Kuchel?" 

"I'm so sorry F/n," she sobbed. 

"What is it? What's wrong?" I asked fearing the answer.

Kuchel pulled away and looked at me, "Your mom...She's dead."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> What will ever happen next?
> 
> Care to share your thought? I'd love to know what you guys expect will happen next.


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter!!
> 
> Always adding new music!!  
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/user/1258003038/playlist/2kBd98ZbURnhuH4T68ukRt
> 
> And the Discord is a lot of fun I love talking to you guys, and it's a great place to get an answer for any question you have about the story!!  
> Discord: https://discord.gg/S6FChAQ

Your Pov

Everything felt like a blur.

I had no control over anything.

The world was moving around me, but I was still. 

Kuchel was crying beside me as we sat in a police station. Mikasa was here too I think; I really wasn't paying attention. I don't know what I was really paying attention too. Maybe the wall? It was this off-white color. What is up with that? Off-white you never hear any other off colors? Or do you? I guess that's something I'll have to ask Levi.

Levi... he said he was going to sleep. I wonder how he's doing? I'm pretty tired myself, but I don't think I'll be going to bed anytime soon...It's cold in here. I wish I had a jacket; I keep my jackets in my closest. It would have been nice to run in and get one before we left...But I couldn't...the officers wouldn't let me in the house...They wouldn't let me in my own house...Cause her body was there...It was a murder scene after all. 

I suddenly felt a hand on my shoulder, but I didn't jump, I felt so numb to everything, I looked over, it was an officer, "Do you need anything." 

For him to take his hand off me, but I didn't say that I only shook my head; I didn't need anything. At least I don't think I did. I wasn't hungry, Petra and I had just eaten pretty much. But if he had asked me if I wanted anything I would have told him I wanted to see my mom...But I can't do that now can I? 

Or maybe my dad...

My dad...

What would I say to him? 

They told me my dad was the one who killed her.

My dad killed my mom.

She's dead, and the man who was supposed to love her did it. 

The more I thought about it, the more I found it harder and harder to breathe. 

I could scream. 

Nothing would ever be the same. My mom was dead.

And I couldn't do anything. So I started to cry, I started to scream. Why was it just dawning on me? It's been hours since I've found out. Why was I reacting now? I'm a terrible daughter. My mommy is gone. I fell to the floor; I just wanted to ball up I wanted my mom. I wanted my mother back! I wanted her to pop up and tell me everything was going to be okay. I wanted this to just a terrible nightmare. I wanted to wake up. Hell, I tried to wake up. 

But this was real.

I heard them calling my name, I felt someone put there hand on my back, but I didn't want them. I wanted my mom. I wanted to be alone. I want to see her, any part of her would be enough. I just wanted to hold her, and she holds me back, why couldn't I do that? I heard them trying to tell me words saying It would be okay, but I didn't want that. I wanted my mom. She was my everything; she's my fucking mom- she's not supposed to die! Not like this!

I was on the ground crying, why couldn't they leave me be? Why did I have to be here of all places? Couldn't they take me home? Can't I just go back to Kuchels? Why am I here?

Just then I felt someone's hand on my shoulder, "F/n," My name was called out by a familiar voice. I looked up and saw Levi. What- How? I didn't care. 

"I'm here," was all he said. And I dove into his arms and kept crying.

"My mom-Levi-- She's gone." 

Levi's Pov

Of all the things that could have happened. 

(mom's name) Was gone.

She was dead. 

And (Dad's name) Did it. 

My mom told me she didn't know all the details, but it was a little before (mom's name) was about to leave out for the night. Evidently, they had got into an argument, and one thing lead to another, and he bashed her into a counter in the kitchen. My mom had heard yelling before then and had already called the police, but by then it was too late. 

She blames herself. 

I didn't blame anyone but her dad. He tried to run, but the police caught him....this whole thing is so fucked. I looked over at F/n. She was drifting in and out of sleep. Waking up crying all I could do was sit here with her and hold her. It had all happened so suddenly. I can't believe just earlier I was laughing with her across the country and now I was here in this hotel room with her. 

I sighed, I should have been here.

I was lucky I was able to get a flight out here so suddenly, but it's a family emergency, so they let me go. 

F/n stirred in her sleep, so I held her tighter. 

I should have been here to protect her, but how was I supposed to protect her from this?... I can't...all I can do is be here for her...

(Mom's name) Is gone. 

The thought keeps replaying in my mind. The woman who's F/n's mother. My mom's best friend. My second mom. She's gone. And she can't come back. It hurt like hell, the hole in my heart from this was intense. I could feel myself whale up with tears. If it was this bad for me, I can't imagine what F/n is going through. 

I sighed again; she shouldn't have to go through this. My mind also kept replaying when I saw F/n on the floor crying it broke my heart. I had never seen her like that. Not even those years ago when she came to our house in a panic that one time. It was the worst. A thousand times worst. She lost everything in a matter of seconds. All because her dad was an insane prideful man. What could he had gotten so angry about? What was so bad that he had to put his hands on her for? 

F/n shouldn't have had to go through this; she shouldn't have had to lose both her parents on the same night, not like this. What is she going to do now? I know she'll stay with my mom. There's no question about that- no, I'm worried about how she'll handle this mentally. 

She bottles things up so much. 

I just wish she doesn't with this; I want her to know I'm here for her. 

I don't have any idea how, but we can make it through this...

I looked over at Mikasa who was asleep in the next bed. She was okay-well as okay as we could be. 

My mother gave me her card and the key to the car to take them out of the police station. She wanted me to go to a hotel, so we didn't have to go home right now...Who knows what it looks like there right now. My mom stayed at the station for a while longer since they still had some questions to ask her. I don't know how long she'll be. I think I'll stay up till she gets back. 

I honestly don't think I'll be falling asleep anytime soon. I think F/n is only falling asleep because she's exhausted herself out from screaming and crying...I hated this.

I hated feeling so helpless. 

I can't do anything for her, hell I can't even do anything for me. 

All I can do is sit and wait. 

Wait for time to just passed by...

Your Pov

~Day 1~

My mom is dead. 

That's the first thing I think when I wake up.

If you call this waking up. I've been up all night. Every time I think I'll fall asleep, I'd remember the horrible truth that is my life now. My mom is dead, and my dad killed her. He got mad she was moving on and killed her. 

I heard Levi and his mom talking about it last night before the fell asleep.

...Well, I don't think any of them slept either. 

Levi had his arms wrapped around me; I could feel him crying last night...I can't remember when the last time I saw Levi cry was. Maybe back when we were kids? It had to be before his dad left though...Cause I remember when that happened he didn't cry. 

I wish I could be strong like he was then about this now...

But I have no idea how. Maybe I could act like nothing happened? I mean...it's like she just went away for a while...It can be like when I'm just over Levi's house all the time...only now...when I go home my mom is already at work...I could feel the tears whale up in me again and start to pour out. 

My life was ruined.

~Day 2~

"F/n you have to eat something," Levi said to me as I laid in the bed in the hotel room we had been staying in for the past two days. Kuchel and Mikasa had left to go back home for now, but Levi and I were still here. 

I didn't sit up when I heard him talking to me, "Please, it's been almost three days."

"I'm not hungry; I just feel like I'll throw it up." 

"I know that, but please try...For me," I heard him plead.

I didn't want to eat. I didn't want to do anything. If anything I want to go back home. I want to sleep in my own bed. I wanted Levi to leave me along right now. I wanted everyone to stop talking to me. I wanted-I want- I wanted to see my dad. I wanted to ask him why he did it. If he ever loved my mom. If he ever loved or thought about me? I wanted so many things right now. 

"If you're not going to eat, at least drink so water," I heard Levi ask as he sat a cup on the nightstand next to me. 

I sighed, I could at least do that. I felt dehydrated, maybe it was from all the crying. I sat up and drank the water Levi had there. 

I looked at him; he looked exhausted. He had been staying up with me these few days...Waiting on me hand and foot. 

"Thank you," Was all I said to him.

Levi mustered up a smile, how could he do that at a time like this? "You're welcome, but I'd much rather you eat something." 

"I'm not hungry." 

"You've said that." 

We stayed silent for a while, "When do we get to go back home?" I asked him.

Levi looked away from me moving to sit down on the bed next to me, "I don't know." 

We went back into silents.

"When do Mikasa and Kuchel get back?" 

"A little while from now," He answered. 

We went back into the silents again. 

"Have you hears anything about my dad?" 

I felt Levi's body tense up, "No," Was all he answered with. I couldn't tell if that was a lie or the truth. Is he trying to keep the truth from me because he doesn't know how I'll handle is he?

I started getting up; I needed some air.

"Where are you going?" Levi asked.

Feeling a bit annoyed, I answered him "I just need some air." Then I left the room, not caring what I looked like. I just was feeling so irritable now, and something about Levi wasn't make it go away. Maybe it was the fact he seemed too strong right now. Why could he carry on like this right now? Shouldn't he be a mess too? She was like a mother to him too, and she's gone, and he's more concerned if I eat or not. I sighed, I just needed some more time to breathe. 

Levi Pov

~Day 5~

It's been five days, and we're going back home tonight. 

My mom was driving while I and F/n were in the backseat. For the time being Mikasa was going to stay over at Erens house. I looked over at F/n. She didn't seem to be paying attention to anything. She still hasn't really eaten. She's just this shell of a person right now. 

I mean it's to be expected, her mom is gone. I just wish she would try...But maybe that's a lot to be asking of her right now. 

We pulled up close to our house, and for the first time since I left, I saw her house. Remnants of yellow tape still hanging around. For the most part, you'd just think no one had taken care of the lawn in a few days. Maybe you could assume they were out for vacation. But in truth, a woman was murdered here. 

I felt her tense up beside me as we pulled into our driveway. I was about to ask F/n how she was she was already out the car walking inside my house.

My mom sighed deeply.

"She hates me," My mom cried. 

"She doesn't," I told her.

"I could have came over when I heard all that noise, but I didn't, I could have saved her. And F/n knows this, and now F/n doesn't have a mother." 

"She doesn't think of it that way," I tried to tell my mom, but she was still crying. 

"I'm going to talk to her; She can stay with me as long as she needs too. We'll move. We can't stay next to this house; I can't wake up in the morning every day and have to look at that," 

Mom," I reached from the back seat and put my hand on her shoulder, "Let's just take one step at a time." 

Your Pov

~Day 8~

So I was living here now. 

If you call staying in bed all day while people beg you to eat living.

But I lived at Kuchel's house bow. 

It's not so bad. But she told me we're going to move...

I was laying under the covers of Levi's bed. It was nice, but this wasn't what I wanted I wanted to be in my own room. So that's what I started to do. I went to my room.

For the first time in days, I had been back in my own room...

It looked the same before I left it last.

Only now empty, but there was nothing missing...just a person. Who knew how much one person could change everything...

"What are you doing?" I heard a voice from my window. I looked through it from where I was standing to see Levi staring at me. I didn't answer him.

"Why don't you come back over here?" 

"I want to just be in my own room Levi," I told him.

Levi sighed and started to walk over, "I want to be alone Levi." I told him.

Levi stopped. He looked like he was having a little battle in his own mind, "If I leave you alone for an hour with that help you feel a little better?" He asked me.

I gave him a light smile, "Yes." 

He hesitated to say anything for a while but then finally said, "Fine," and walked away.

At least he cares...

I looked back at my bed; I just need a nap. 

 

~Day 13~

"F/n I have to go back to L.A." 

Levi spoke those words to me one morning. 

I don't know why, but part of me forgot he had to do that eventually.

"Can't you stay?" I asked him, already feeling alone. As much hell, I feel like I've been giving him I still wanted him to stay here. I needed Levi here with me. I think he's the only thing that's keeping me somewhat sane...

Levi didn't say anything for a moment, "I'll just be gone for a week, and then I'll be back, sooner If I can." 

I looked him in the eye, "Promise?" 

Levi held my hand tighter with his own, "Promise." 

"I have to leave tomrrow...I'm sorry it's so soon," He told me.

"But when I land you'll be the first one I call." 

I just nodded, I didn't want him to leave, but in the back of my mind I know he still has a life to live. I mean he's okay, he can bounce back, his mom is still alive, and his dad isn't in jail for killing her. I'll just be happy when he gets back.

Levi Pov

~Day 13~

"I don't think she's going to come to the airport." I told my mother, "She doesn't need to. You don't either. I'll text when I land." I told her the morning of me going back to L.A. 

F/n is still up there sleep. That's all she's been doing sleeping...She's not even crying anymore; she's just so numb. I hated leaving her like this, but I have too. I just have to believe in my mom and Mikasa to take care of her, and I know they will. Only for a week, if not less. They just have a few more scenes to shoot. Mostly the ones with me in them. They've managed to record all the scene I'm not in, and now they just need me for a few scenes I am in. And as soon as I'm done I can come back home. 

Hopefully in enough time for the funeral. 

Mom says she thinks that might be what F/n needs to move on a little...a funeral. 

I really hope it does. She has no life in here right now, she's just been so empty, and I have no idea how to fix her. All I've been able to do is just hope she'll get better. And the more I try I almost feel like the angrier she gets at me. Maybe we needed a little space. I shook my head I hated this. I hated all of this. 

I sighed, I need to calm down, It's going to be alright.

Wounds heal. 

This was just going to take a lot of time. 

But I'll get my F/n back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> I'm not quite sure about this chapter cause I tried something a bit different, but I do hope you all liked it. (as much as you can like angst) This one was mostly about F/n greaving and Levi greaving and reacting to the reader. 
> 
> Leave some comments I'm curious what you guys are thinking about this chapter.
> 
> P.s This might be the last chapter you guy will get until Sunday cause ya girl has some long work days for the rest of the week :( ((but then again will see pray for small miracle ))
> 
> xoxo


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whaaat new chapter?
> 
> Discord link: https://discord.gg/S6FChAQ
> 
> Playlist link: https://open.spotify.com/user/1258003038/playlist/2kBd98ZbURnhuH4T68ukRt
> 
> Just copy and paste! :)

Your Pov

"You don't have to go to school F/n," Kuchel told me, "If you want you can stay here with me today. I might go out today you can hang with me?." 

I sighed, "No. I want too." I told her. 

And it was true. I didn't feel like staying in the house anymore; I wanted to go out...It's been a mouth after all. 

Kuchel gave me this sympathetic smile, "Okay sweetie, I'll give you a ride if you want. Are you hungry?" 

I shook my head, "No, I'm fine." 

Kuchel just nodded and got up to the door, and I quietly followed her. 

We honestly haven't talked much since all this happened. Neither one of us knows what to say to each other. Or maybe she's just giving me space I really don't know. Mikasa hasn't been around much either. She's always at Erens now, a lot more then she had been before everything happened, And Levi's back in L.A.

Maybe it's because my mom is dead, but this is the loneliest I've ever felt in my life. 

I know their all greaving in their own way too...but I wish they would talk to me...about anything really. Anything else but telling me I should eat...or it will be okay one day...or we're moving. I want them to pretend nothing happened. I just want everything to go back to how it was before she died. 

I want Levi here, maybe he would know if he was just around. But he's not. Instead, he's still in L.A. I'm not mad about it. I'm just...annoyed. We talk on the phone every now and then, but it's not the same...it's like he's going it just to check in on me, seeing if I ate...or seeing if I went out and did anything. And every time I tell him I didn't do anything, it's like he's disappointed in me. And I don't want him to be like that; I want him to say something funny, I want him...to just be normal again.

Maybe's he's forgotten what normal is?... I mean part of me feels like I have.

"You sure you'll be fine?" Kuchel asked as we pulled up to the school.

I nodded.

I heard her sigh. See this wasn't the Kuchel I was Knew. 

"F/n, Are you okay?" 

"Yeah," I answered her.

"I don't think you are though sweetie," Kuchel said to me. I almost wanted to laugh; it shouldn't take a genius to know that. But how else am I supposed to answer that? "I don't know what to say or do to make you feel better, and I honestly don't think there is anything I can do, you've lost your mother. And I know I can never replace her, but I've always considered you my child too, so know I'm here...And whenever you're ready to talk I'll listen...I'm always here with open arms."

I didn't know how to respond to that. So I just nodded at her again and got out the car. 

I just want to go to school and act like everything is okay. Is that so bad?

I need things to be normal again.

Later

I don't know why I thought going back to school would be okay.

I thought everyone here would act the same. But there worst then Mikasa and Kuchel. Everyone has either been avoiding me no doubt because they don't want to be in an awkward situation, which I don't really blame them but still. They don't have to act like this, and for the ones that do talk to me Furlan and Bella; they just keep asking me if I'm okay.

I hate it. I just hate it so much. 

I just had to get away. 

So now I was sitting on the steps outside the school calling Levi. 

I just wanted to hear his voice.

After what felt like forever he finally answered. 

"Hey," 

"Hey," I answered back quietly.

"How's everything going? My mom said you went back to school today," Levi said.

I sighed, "I thought it would-It's been fine." 

"You sure?" He asked.

"Yeah, what have you been doing today?" I asked him, changing the subject. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want people feeling sorry for me anymore. I just want things to go back to normal and talking about my problems isn't going to help.

Levi sighed deeply, "F/n if you're not ready just go back home no one will be upset wi-" 

"Levi I said I'm fine," I said cut him off.

"Fine, I've been busy with some random interviews today, I should be back home next week." 

I smiled to myself, I'm glad he's dropping it. "I can't wait till you get back," 

"Same, these last few days have been exhausting," 

"Speaking of the show I heard your mom and Mikasa talking the other night, there's going to be some special coming out about the show with the first preview in a few days right?"

"I think that's actually tonight," Levi said sounding like I just reminded him.

"I can't wait to see what you've been working on out there." 

"It's not that big of a deal." 

"Don't try and downplay it down, Levi you're awesome." 

"Sure," Levi said trailing off. "I gotta go F/n." 

"Oh, okay," I said feeling disappointed.

"I'm sorry, I wish I could talk to you longer, but they need me real quick." 

"It's fine Levi," I told him.

Levi didn't say anything for a moment, "You sure you're okay?" 

"Yeah," I told him feeling upset again, why can't he drop it? Can't he see I'm just trying to move on from it? "I'll talk to you late." then I hung up. 

It just wasn't the same. Even with him.

I don't want to be treated like I'm this delicate flower anymore, It's so fucking frustrating, all it does it remind me that I have a reason to be sad. That my mom is dead. I started to cry. Why did they have to do this too me? Why couldn't my mom had fought harder to live...for me. It's selfish but damn it, it's ruined everything. My parents ruined my whole life with this. 

"F/n?" 

I heard my name called and I quickly started to try and dry my face, "Oh, I was just out here-" I stopped when I saw it was that guy Samuel. "Oh, hi." 

"I haven't seen you in a while, where you been?" He asked ignoring the fact I was just sitting here crying.

"Family stuff," I told him trying to shrug it off. 

He laughed a little, "Families are the worst sometimes," 

I sighed, "You have no idea," 

"I bet I do." 

I shook my head, "So your dad killed your mom?" 

His eyes went a little wide for a bit, but then he shook his head, "Nah, but my mom sure did disappear one day and left me with my shit dad." Samuel sat down sat down next to me. I still didn't know much about him, but that sounds pretty messed up, "I'm guessing you won't be giving your dad any best dad in the world cards anytime soon tho." He said.

I couldn't help but laugh at the dark joke, "I'm guessing you're on the same bout then?" 

"Yeah, parents suck," He said smiling,

"Why do they even have kids I wonder," I said thinking out loud.

"Cause they think it will bring them closer, some bullshit like that I'm sure," he answered.

"Sounds about right." 

We both sat there in a comfortable silence for a while. Funny enough he's the only person who hasn't asked me if I was okay. Maybe he knew that was the last thing I would want to hear. Either way, I'm thankful.

Levi Pov

"I don't get what you're asking me, Levi," Furlan said over the phone. 

A little while after I got off the phone with F/n I decided to call Furlan, "I'm just saying try to act normal...I think she's getting mad at everyone for treating her like she's going to break at any moment." 

"But have you seen her? She does look like she'll break any moment. She's lost so much weight. it's scary...she looks like a ghost." 

"Well her mom did just die, so I get that, but listen; don't treat her like that happened I think she just wants everything to go back to normal." 

"I'm just trying to be a good friend to her Levi," He snapped at me.

"I get that. And I'm just saying be a friend but treating her like a regular person." I told him. Since I talked to her, that's what I think she was trying to do, whenever I asked about her she just blew it off. She has to be tried of hearing are you okay, or people asking her anything. And if it will work then, that's what I want. I just want her to be okay again. It's alarming how much weight everyone keeps telling me that she's losing; or how much she's looking like a ghost of herself, but I can't do anything for here over here.

I can't wait till this is over and I can just go back home to her. I know she needs me right now, I don't know what I can do for her, but I know I can just be there. "What is she doing now anyway?" 

"I don't I haven't seen her in a minute," Furlan answered.

"What the hell do you mean you don't know?" I asked him getting angry he's supposed to be keeping an eye on her. 

"She disappeared at lunch-" 

"Well, go fucking find her!" I snapped at him. I don't like the idea of her being alone. I don't care if she's sad or wants to be alone, she shouldn't be anywhere by herself because of that. She needs someone knowing where she is...Cause what if she did something...I shook the thought of my head she would say something. She wouldn't just do anything like that.

"Fine, I'll text you later," Furlan said, hanging up.

I sighed, I hated this.

Knowing she was going through this, knowing she's going through this alone, I wish I could be there with her. She needs me, I'm supposed to be the one to protect her, her shoulder to lean on, And I'm nowhere to be seen. I hated myself for this. Why was I even here? I'm a thousand miles away from her, and for what? To be on some dumb show? I don't need this...But I know if I just drop it then she'd get mad, not to mention the contract I agreed to for this, then again it's not in stone yet. It's only if the show does well...Part of me hopes it doesn't...

"You alright in here? I heard you yelling," I heard a voice say.

I looked at the door to see Cira standing there, I groaned, she's one of the last people I want to see right now. I don't know why but she had been making her presence known a lot more the usual especially with the flirting and stuff it was beyond annoying, everyone on set new I had to leave because my girlfriend's mom died, but she didn't seem to care. And doing interviews with her was already the worst she always likes to act like there something going on between us, and I just feel like it's going to start rumors or something, but then again I might be over thinking it. I don't know. 

"I'm fine, I'll be out in a minute," I told her. 

She looked at me tilting her head, "Girl problems?" 

"Yeah, sure. Anyway, I said it was fine." 

"You must have a really nice girlfriend back where you're from for you to be so fateful to her like you are," she said.

I groaned, "I do." I started to head out I didn't want anyone to get the wrong idea with us being in this room alone. So I pushed passed to get through the door, but she stopped me by grabbing one of my arms.

"It's sweet," She said in a gentle voice.

"I've already told you I'm not interested Cira," I told her.

"I'm just saying what she won't know won't kill her, you're hot I'm hot we make sense plus if we start dating it will make the show buzz even louder, and I know you want this to work out, I'm just trying to help you out." 

I snatched away from her, "I don't want your help." Then I walked off. She has some nerve. I really don't like girls who act like this. 

I was walking back to set to see where we were at but then my phone started to buzz, I looked and saw it was Furlan.

-F/n left the school with that pothead that wears the black coat, sorry man

~Later~

I looked at the text on my phone.

-Where are you?

It was Levi, but I ignored it putting it back in my pocket. I looked over at Samuel. We were at some bar...

I know it was strange, and I shouldn't be here, but it was interesting. And he's the only person I know that's not acting like I'm about to self-destruct. but still..."Why are we here though?" I asked him looking around. The place was...well it left a lot to be desired. I only saw a few people sitting in random corners; it's pretty sketchy. If I were by myself I'd deffently would have already left; I know Levi wouldn't eat anything from here either. I bet he'd have a whole heart attack if he even walked in here. I couldn't help but laugh at the thought. 

"What's so funny?" Samuel asked me.

I shook my head, "Just thinking about my boyfriend, He'd have fit if he ever came in here." I told him.

"Your boyfriend?" Samuel asked.

I could have sworn I've mentioned him. "Yeah, Levi..." 

"Ackerman?" He asked, "I heard he's in L.A." 

"Yeah, he's filming a show down there," I answered him, "It's pretty cool." 

"Wait, so you're that F/n?" He asked.

"That F/n?" I questioned.

"I remember for a while there was a girl at the school named F/n, and it was a known rule no one could ask you out or something stupid like that, I never really cared about it cause I didn't know you but now that you've mentioned his name I just put two and two together." He said leaning on the bar.

I couldn't help but smile, Levi's so crazy, "Yeah, He did do something like that, so I've been told." I told him. I couldn't help but feel a little bit embarrassed. It just reminded how stupid he could be sometimes. 

"Will he be mad that we're hanging out?" Samuel asked with a smile on his face, "I'm am guessing he's jealous type?"

That's when I thought of it myself. Knowing Levi, he would get a little mad if he knew where I was right now, "He'd probably be, but it will be fine." I told him. I mean he'd be upset, but I bet if he knew I was feeling a bit better he'd understand then. Maybe he'd get I just needed this. 

Samuel started laughing.

"Whats so funny?" 

"You are, you want anything to drink?" He asked.

"Water would be nice," I told him.

He just snorted, "I mean do you want something to drink, I bet it will help take your mind off everything." 

"riiight," I said sarcastically. "You know that's totally illegal no one here is going to give us anything to drink. I still don't know how we got in here." 

"I'm Friends with the owner," He said getting up and walking to the other side of the bar. 

"What are you doing?: I snapped at him. He was crazy!

"Getting us something to drink," He said pouring some beer into two glasses. I don't even drink beer. But still, he passed me one. 

"Drink." 

"I don't think I should..." I told him, I didn't even like the taste of beer.

"Come on, just a sip, live a little." 

"I'm living just fine," I told him in a joking voice. 

"Oh, yeah? how about a drink for your mom? just a drink in her memory?" 

I sighed, I wasn't expecting him to say that, I guess he wasn't letting up. "Fine." 

I took a sip of the cool drink and started coughing, God I hate the taste of beer, it's so bitter. 

"You good?" Samuel asked, I could hear the smile in his voice, but I ignored it. 

"I'm fine." 

I sat there and watched him sipping his beer while he looked like he was thinking of something, "So..." He finally said after a while, "How'd she died...or how'd you dad kill her if you don't mind me asking." 

I sure wasn't expecting that, "I don't really know all the details...bottom line they started fighting and she didn't come out of it alive that time." I told him.

Samuel sighed loudly, "That fucking sucks, have you talked to your dad?" 

"No, I don't even know what I'd say if I did," I told him. It has been something I'd been thinking about for a while, what would I do if I saw him again? 

"You good?" Samuel asked taking me out of my own thoughts.

I nodded, "Yeah I'm fine." 

"So what are you going to do now? Are you going to keep glooming around? I'm guessing you've been crying about it for a while?" 

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked him feeling a bit offended. 

"I'm just asking are you going to keep feeling sorry for yourself or are you going to keep moving on with your life? I mean what can you do, she's dead now right...get over it people die all the time." He said sounding a bit uninterested. 

But hearing those words it felt like something clicked, he's right, "I mean it's not like I want to be sad," I told him honestly, "I mean I'm upset and sad about it...she was my mom...it's just everyone around me has been so weird lately." 

Samuel laughed, "Don't you just hate when people do that?" 

I just nodded. 

Samuel shook his head at me, "Just tell them to move on, it's fucking life right? Shit happens?" 

I smiled he was right. 

I wish everyone else could think like this...then this whole thing would be a lot less painful I'm sure...

 

~Later

I still can't believe I skipped school to hang out in a bar. I'd bet if anyone who knew me found out I did that, would never believe it. Samuel and I had left a while ago; now we're just in front of Kuchel's house, I was currently telling him random stuff about my house. 

"I can't believe you caught your lawn on fire," Samuel laughed.

"It was a mistake, and we had fireworks I didn't know what I was doing, and Levi's dad wasn't watching us, it was not my fault!" I laughed remembering the story I was telling him. It was better times then. Better times I'd never be getting back again.

Samuel and I laughed for a bit more.

"Thanks for today again," I told him before getting out the car. "I really needed this." 

"I figured when I saw you crying on the steps I'm glad I could help," He said.

I smiled back at him, and for a second it almost felt like he was leaning in, but right after I blinked he wasn't as close to my face anymore...What the hell was that? I shook my head; I'm overthinking. "I'll see you tomorrow?" 

"Maybe," He joked.

I smiled and got out his car, and started heading to Kuchel's I didn't go unnoticed by me the for sale poster that was in the grass...I guess she really does want to move. I mean what's left anyway? We had the funeral last mouth...I got what I decided I wanted to keep from the house; everything else belongs to the state now- I shook my head, I'm not thinking about it anymore. Samuel was right; this is life, people die I need to just move on...who cares right? I'm sure someone has it worst. 

I just wished everyone else could see it like that. 

Once I walked into the house, I heard my name called out from the other room. 

 

"Oh, my Gosh F/n," Kuchel practically yell, "Where have you been?" 

Clearly, she looked stressed, "I was just out with a friend." 

Kuchel sighed nodding her head, she took a step back from me like she was thinknig about something, "Right...just- next time answer a text okay." Kuchel sat down on the chair that was in the room, "You had me worried." 

I couldn't help but feel a bit bad form stressing her out like that, "My bad, Kuchel..." 

"It's fine...How was your day at school?" 

"It was-" 

"You guys Levi's on tv." Mikasa came into the room saying before walking back into the living room.

Kuchel quickly got up, "Well you just got home in time didn't you." 

I followed her into the living room. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't excited to see the first preview apparently tonights it's an exclusive first look or something, it's on one of those celebrities new shows and they are doing a whole segment on his show, I'm really excited about this.

We all sat down to watch, and as soon as I looked at the tv Levi's face was on it, and I couldn't help but yelp out a scream. It was so weird seeing him but on the actual tv. It was Insane! 

Kuchel also screamed to so at least I wasn't alone there, Mikasa seemed to trying to be focused on what the trailer was saying. It was lost of flashes of parts of the show with them talking. I could see it was set in a school. It looked good so far. All the people I'm guessing he's working with on the show seem nice, or at least their characters seem nice. I even saw snips of the kissing scene Levi had mentioned in the preview, but I wasn't worried. The girl he was with was beautiful, but like he said before it was just for show. 

It had moved on to the interviewing with them now, and it was so cute. The little met the cast thing was cool. It seems like Levi is working with some cool people. 

"I wonder if he'll mention us?" Kuchel said out loud as we watched them talk about their families and stuff. 

"I bet he'd only mention F/n," Mikasa joked. 

I just rolled my eyes. In the back of my mind I couldn't help but notice what was going on...we were acting normal. 

Maybe Levi's show will be something that will bring us all back together. I smiled to myself looking at Kuchel and Mikasa watched the TV. You could tell how proud they were of Levi. It must be really nice for Kuchel to see her child do what he loves...But it's fine like Samuel said shit happens I can move on. 

"So do any of you been hooking up behind the cameras the fans want to know, any real-life shipping?" The interviewer asked him. 

"I bet this is where he needlessly plugs you in F/n," Mikasa snorted. 

We all just watched them talk most of them denying anything, once it got to the girl sitting next to Levi thought it kinda really caught my attention. She was really leaning his way...I mean practically in his lap...and he wasn't doing much to stop her. I shook my head though; I don't know what's going on there maybe there's something wrong with her chair. 

"Well, what about you Levi? from some of the local polls, you keep coming up to be quite popular with the ladies, anyone special in your life?" The interviewer asked him.

"This doesn't count they're bating him to say your name," Mikasa laughed.

"Aw, this is so cute," Kuchel said. 

I couldn't help but feel warm myself. Levi is stupid and crazy sometimes, but at the end of the day, I really love him. Even with everything that's going on.

Levi shifted in his seat, "Actually no, I just want to focus on the show right now, getting my life together first." He answered.

I frowned. 

"But don't count him on the market for too long," The girl that was almost on his lap added, winking at the interviewer. And Levi only shrugged in response with s sly smile.

I just kept frowning. 

No one had said anything. 

I think I was just trying to let what just happened to sink in. Did he just say he didn't have a girlfriend?... And did that girl just hint that they might be dating? 

"F/n?" Kuchel called out my name. "I'm sure there's a reason." 

"Oh," was all I said. But I couldn't help but think, even if there were a reason Levi should have told me right...he would have told me right? I stood up and stretched, "Er, I think I'm going to head to bed for the night." 

"We can call him right?" Mikasa asked. 

But I shook my head, "I'm sure he's busy right now, I'll um- I'll talk to him tomorrow." Then I headed upstairs. 

This certainly goes on a list of thing I wasn't expecting to happen...

Maybe I was wrong, maybe his show isn't going to bring us together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Super sorry for updating so late but work has been kicking my ass, (but no excuses I'll get this story done!) Hopefully I'll have enough energy to get the next chapter out sooner than later!
> 
> We're still chilling in angst vill so that's a thing, I hope you all like it, (Idk I feel like I've been writing fluff for so long I'm losing my angst touch I'm just not feeling it) 
> 
> Anyways tell me what you think of this chapter, I'd love to know or if you wanna say anything else I honestly don't mind lol ((also apologizing for any crappy editing on this chapter I'm very sleepy I can bearly see right now)) 
> 
> Anyway, you all are great, I love you are you're just the best!
> 
> xoxo


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter! whoop! whoop!

Your pov

"So I was talking to couch, and she said she wouldn't mind giving you another tryout," Ymir told me as we sat in the classroom waiting for the teacher to come back in.

I shrugged her off, "It's fine." 

"But I thought you really wanted to be on the dance team?" She asked me.

"I mean that was at the beginning of the year Ymir," I told her. 

"Yeah, but when was the last time you danced?" Bella butted in.

"I don't know, I just don't feel like doing it, besides I'm already busy afterschool now," I told them.

"Don't tell me you're hanging out with that Samuel guy again?" Bella asked.

"And so what if I am?" I questioned her.

Bella and Ymir looked at each other for a second, then turned to me, "Don't you think you've been hanging out with him for long enough?" Bella asked me. 

"No, he's just a friend," I answered her bluntly. Because I don't think I have, it's not like I hang out with him every day. We only go out a few times in the week, most of the other time he's busy with doing something else and can't hang out.

"Okay be that as it may don't you think shortie wouldn't like how much time you spend with him? I mean it's another guy." Ymir added.

"Well, he isn't here to say if he'd like it now is he?" I snapped. 

Ymir looked a bit taken back. 

I sighed, "Sorry," Then I went to look at my notes. That was a bit aggressive, and I didn't mean it at her. 

I mean I was upset. But it wasn't at them. It was at Levi. 

Lately, it's just been so-so ugh! I hate it. Ever since that interview, it's been annoying talking to him. He called and said that he didn't even say that stuff that the studio edited the conversation or something stupid like that, but then a few days later I see an article in a magazine with him and that same girl leaving a store together in L.A. He said again they edited it, and they just want more views...I just don't know what to believe my own eyes and ears or him. 

It's complicated and annoying...So I've been ignoring him...I just get upset when I'm talking to him.

"You know what I'm just going to come out and say it," Ymir spoke up again making me look at her. "You've been acting different, and I don't like it." 

I just stared at her. 

"Of course she's acting different Ymir, her mom-" Bella said.

"I know that!" Ymir yelled back, "but that doesn't mean you have to act like this, have you seen yourself lately F/n?" She asked looking at me. "You look like a ghost, you won't eat, and you don't even talk to us anymore, and not to mention you hang out with the school drug dealer, this isn't you." 

"Oh, and your suddenly an expert on who I am?" I asked Ymir. I was annoyed she was calling me out like this. 

"Well, Apparently I am because it doesn't look like you know anymore. Even the way you just snapped when I brought up Levi, you would never do that." 

"You don't know anything about me Ymir, so why don't you stop trying to pretend you do, alright." I snapped back at her.

"Come on you two just calm down," Bella said between us. 

"I'm just saying this because you're my friend," Ymir said sighing.

I rolled my eyes, "I'm over this anyway." 

I started to put all my stuff in my bag to leave out. 

"Where are you going?" Bella asked me.

"Out." 

"But class?" 

"But who cares," I said leaving the room.

I'm not acting. Differently, they all are. This would never be a problem if they just didn't start treating me like I was going to break. This is their fault; it's my mom's fault. She should have tried harder to stay alive. I stopped walking, and shook my head; I shouldn't think that way...my mom didn't do anything wrong. I took a deep breath; I just need to see Samuel.

Levi's Pov

"This is F/n, and it sounds like you tried to call me, and I didn't pick up the phone super sorry about that, if you leave a message I'll be sure to get back to you as soon as I can." 

I listened to F/n's voicemail. 

"It's Levi if you get this one call me back F/n- please. I love you." Then I hung up.

Lately, that's all I've been getting. Her voicemail. I know she's pissed at me, and there isn't anything I can do about it right now. This show is screwing me over when it comes to F/n.

First, they pulled that shit in the interview and edited half of everything I said including the part about F/n. I had told the lady interviewing about F/n and how she was my girlfriend. But they flipped it and made it sound like I didn't say any of that and instead was falling for Cira, which wasn't even close to the truth. The producers said it was just to help get better ratings, but still, I didn't like this. And I know those photoshopped pictures didn't help. The whole cast had gone out shopping that day, but somehow they only got Cira and me. Like I said this show is screwing things up so bad. 

And I don't blame F/n for getting upset, but still to be just outright ignoring me? I thought we were over pity shit like this. Not to mention mom keeps telling me some nights she comes home late, or how Furlan and Bella tell me that she hangs out with this Samuel guy all the time now. This just isn't like her. She's changing. And I'm not there to help. I sighed, but I'm done for now. 

I go back home tomorrow. Finally. 

And I'll be home for a while. Were done shooting...at least for now, the show looks like it's going to do really well, so that's good. I was talking to my manager I just got, and basically what will most likely happen is I'll have to move down there permanently if we do any more seasons, and I'm fine with that, just as long as I can bring F/n and my mom and Mikasa with me. Which with what I'm getting paid won't be a problem. Plus my mom just wanted to move anyway. 

And that way I can keep F/n close to me.

But first we just have to finish up these last two months of school, then we can start over. We can really start to put all this shit behind us. I know it won't be easy, but at least we can start. Cause I know, we can't do anything to heal if we're still there. 

Just then my phone started to ring, I pulled it back out hoping to see F/n's name, but instead It was Bella. That was weird usually it's Furlan that call me, and she's in the background.

"What's up?" I answered.

"When are you coming back because F/n is losing it, and I don't know what to do." She stated.

"What is she doing now?" I asked fearing the answer.

"She just left class, she's with that Samuel guy all the time, and I don't like him, he's shady. Like hella. I and she won't listen to Ymir or me when I tell her to leave him alone."

This Samuel guy I keep hearing about was getting on my nerve, who even was he? And why did he think he could talk to her? All the guys know better. "I'll talk to her," I told her.

"Riiight because that's been working, when will you be back?" She snapped at me.

"I'll be back tomorrow." I sighed telling her, "And I'll be back till we graduate, She'll get back on track." 

"I hope so," Bella said, "I really wish I knew what to do to help her out." 

"I know, just remember she's going through a lot," 

"Yeah, but still." Bella trailed off, "She's not the same." 

"Would you be if your mom got murdered by your dad." 

"No- I just wish I could help...I just don't know how." 

I sighed, this was hard on everyone, "I'll be back tomorrow like I said everything will be fine. I have to go now I'll talk to you later okay?" After that, I hung up. I ran my hands through my hair. This is temporary. When I get back F/n will go back to normal; she just needs me there with her. That's what I have to keep telling myself. I don't want to admit it out loud, but she's scaring me. Hanging out with a drug dealer? I don't know what's going through her head. And her not talking to me isn't helping at all. 

Just a few hours though. When I see her, I'll hold her...And just let her know it's going to be okay.

Your Pov

I listened to the voicemail Levi had left. 

If you asked me it sounded like he was sad or something...but why would he be sad? He's living it up in L.A.

I mean that's what it looks like. 

Just then Samuel got back into the car, "Look what I found inside," he tossed a magazine at me and one the cover was Levi and his other cast people.

"I don't really want to see this." I handed it back to him. I had already told him about that interview and how I felt about the whole thing. I don't know why he would think I would want to see this. 

"It's an exclusive." He wiggled his eyebrows. 

I just huffed out a laugh, "I'm good." But then he opened it and started flipping through the pages. 

"It's good. I might try and watch it when it comes on," He joked. From what I could tell he wasn't a tv person. 

"Sam quit it, just get the pump out already," I told him trying to take the magazine. We were at a gas station, and I'm sure the pump had stopped already.

"In a sec," He pulled away from me.

"Stop it," I told him, but then his face went serious. 

"Sources say Levi Ackerman Left and Cira Nickum Right were seen outside a local club, could there be romance behind the camera too?" He said out loud then showed me a picture of the two of them staring at each other outside somewhere in L.A.

I felt my heart sink. 

I hated this feeling. 

"I told you I didn't want to read it." I sat back in my seat. That was the last thing I wanted to see. 

"He's such a dick," Samuel said harshly. 

But something about that just didn't sit right with me. I don't know; I guess I don't like other people calling out Levi only me. I was about to speak up, but he had already got out of the car. 

Well, at least he cares. Well, cares enough to say something about it... Samuel went back in the car and turned to me, "Why are you even still going out with that loser?" 

"I mean he's Levi," I told him.

He looked like me like he was saying so. 

I shook my head, "It's a long story, I'm mad at him right now, but I know it won't last." 

"So you don't care he's cheating on you?" 

Stab.

"He's not cheating on me," I told him.

Sam just gave me this yeah right look. 

"This is Levi I'm talking about, he loves me, and I love him we've been this way forever." 

"Yet you're riding in a car with me, and he's in L.A. doing god knows what." Samuel said, "Face it doll, sometimes people grow apart, and that's just the way the world works." 

"But not me and Levi," I told him, as I started to fiddle with my ring...This is supposed to mean something...We're supposed to be together forever...Even with all this shit going on right now I still love him...That's when it hit me I should be talking to him. We can't work anything out if I'm ignoring him. "I think you should take me home Samuel."

"Huh?" 

I didn't turn to look at him, "I just want to go home." 

"You're not upset about what I just said are you?" He asked me.

"No," I told him, "I mean I'm just thinking. You're right." Maybe I was spending too much time with him. 

"I hope you're really not going back to him F/n," Sam said.

I huffed out some air, "It's like I said It's him and me forever I think I've been avoiding him long enough." 

"I never guess you'd be so dumb, but I guess you'll just have to see it yourself to believe it," Samuel said under his breath. I ignored him. He tends to be a bit blunt, so I didn't get upset at his comment. He's only trying to look out for me. And I'm grateful, but again I'm talking about Levi here. 

It didn't take that long for him to bring me back home.

"Thanks, Samuel..." I started to tell him, "For everything You have no idea how much you've helped me these last few weeks." 

"Yet, you're going back to the problem." 

"The problem?" I asked him.

"This guy? Levi wasn't he half the problem you had. Treating you like you were about to break? Him and his mom? You know if you want you can just live with me." 

I just shook my head, "I know, but I just have to talk to him." I held my finger up showing him my ring. "He gave me this; it means something, Levi isn't the type of person to just say words and not mean them." 

Samuel didn't look convinced, "Whenever you come to your senses hit me up." 

"Samuel-" 

"If you really want to thank me you'd realize I was right, but it's cool now, I got shit to do. I'll see you later." 

I didn't say anything and just got out his car. I mean he makes me feel a bit guilty. I know he's done a lot of me, but he didn't know what I knew about Levi. Just as I got out the car, Samuel zoomed off. I guess he was really upset. I'll have to remember to say something to him about this. But right now I need to get inside and call Levi.

I went inside the house and Saw Kuchel in the kitchen she was leaning on the sink.

"Hey," I called out to her.

"F/n, can you come here for a sec?" 

I walked in to talk to her.

"Where were you today? The shook called saying you left." 

I looked away from her, "I was hanging out with a friend." 

"Is this the same guy I keep hearing about? This Samuel guy?" She asked, "I've heard he's not a good influence." 

I wonder who's told her this. Mikasa maybe? Damn her. "I don't think so; he's a cool guy. but I'm sorry for not telling you I skipped." 

"It's fine...Just- Just keep me updated when you're out. I get really worried about you F/n." Kuchel told me.

"You don't have to worry about me-" 

"But I do young lady," Kuchel said cutting me off, "I don't know if you noticed it or not but you're not yourself lately. And I am not blaming you or saying this change is a bad thing, but I am saying you just went through some hard things that I can never imagine what it's like. I'm only trying to be here for you. You just have to let me." 

I bit my lip, Maybe she was right, when I looked at her she had bags under her eyes. Have I been stressing her out? Along with what happened to my mom her best friend...this can't be easy on her, and all of a sudden she's a mother of three...How did I not even think about Kuchel? Have I been this selfish?

"I'm sorry," I told her.

I heard her sigh, "You don't have to be sorry." That was all she said.

I didn't know how to respond to that, so I headed upstairs I needed to talk to Levi. I should apologize to him for how I've been acting. 

I got to our bed and laid down. When I think about it, I know I've missed him. I was just so angry before, I mean I've just been angry and miserable. 

I picked up my phone and dialed him up. The phone rung for a while, I was about to hang up, but then I heard someone answer. 

"Ello?" 

"Um, Hi," I said not knowing whose voice this was. 

"Who is calling?" It was a girls voice. 

"This is F/n can I talk to Levi?" I asked.

"F/n as in Levi's girlfriend F/n?" 

Oh, so he's mentioned me? I felt my heart speed up. "Ye-" 

"Or should I say his ex-girlfriend." The girl said. 

What?

"Um, can I just talk to Levi?" I asked. 

"Sorry he's not free right now, we're sorta busy." She said, and before I knew it, she hung up. 

I sat up on the bed; replaying what just happened. 

I called Levi, and a girl answered and called me his ex, said he was too busy to talk and hung up. 

I could feel myself getting worked up. 

He's going to be in L.A. with hot girls. He's been working with his hot girl and been kissing her in the show it would only be natural for him to start to actually feel something for her...but to treat me like this?

I never thought Levi would do this to me, But Samuel said it. People change.

Levi Pov

I was beyond pissed. 

F/n called me last night, and I wasn't in the room when she did and instead Cira told me she answered to talked to her. And I have no idea what she told her. All I know now F/n won't answer me again. Whatever Cira told her it couldn't have been good. Honestly fuck her. 

Why did it feel like everything was trying to turn F/n and me away from each other? 

I took a deep breath, just a few houses to go.

I'll be home soon; I'm going to pop at the school and surprise her. She likes silly stuff like that, so I really hope this works.

I just need to calm down. I don't even think she knows I'm coming, that's how much we haven't been talking. It wasn't even this bad when we were dating other people. I messed with the ring at the end of my necklace. 

This still means something to me, and I know it has too to her. I just need to see her, and we just need to talk for a bit then she'll know what's been going on. Only God knows what her imaginations come with; I know it hasn't been anything good. If it were she wouldn't have been ignoring me. And I know Cira didn't help. 

I looked at the clock, just a few more hours. 

And well, be back together. 

Later

I finally got to the school. I ended up taking an uber to get there, but I didn't mind. My mom was at work, and F/n didn't know I was going to be coming back and I can't count on Mikasa like that.

I texted Furlan to tell him I was here but he didn't answer back. That was fine. When I got inside the school it was during class; she should be in her class with Ymir and Bella. I had picked up some flowers for her. F/n's going to be surprised when she sees me; she'll love this.

I don't know if I believe this, or if I'm trying to convince myself. 

I was approaching the classroom right when I saw someone come out of it and slammed the door loudly. Whoever they were they weren't having a good day. And they started to head the other way. I watched them leave, but that's when I realized who it was. 

Shit. 

"F/n?" I called out. 

But someone called her name out at the same time that was at the opposite end of the hall. I looked past her to see she was heading for some guy in a black jacket. It wasn't even that cold. I shook my head to focus, "F/n," I called again, this time she turned to me. Her mouth was wide open.

"Levi?" She questioned. 

Something told me this wasn't going to go the way I was hoping it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!!
> 
> So much drama, and in the next chapter? More drama for sure. 
> 
> Any thoughts for the next chapter? How will Levi react to meeting Samuel? Will he even meet Samuel? Are you guys shipping reader and Samuel??? Will F/n be okay? Or will she keep going down this dark hole? Will she and Levi talk everything out? What about prom? There just so many questions that need answers!! I wanna know what's on your minds!!!
> 
> Again thanks for reading you all are the best!!
> 
> xoxo


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter!!

Your Pov

I rubbed my eyes trying to make sure I wasn't dreaming. "Levi?" I questioned again. 

And it was true, there he was standing there looking at me with flowers in his hand. But I didn't even know he was coming back? Kuchel didn't even tall me. Neither did Mikasa. Why was he here? 

He got closer to me, "Hi." 

"Hi-hel-hey," I stuttered. I didn't know what I was feeling as I looked at him. So many thoughts were running though my head. At first, I think it was happiness, but then I remembered calling him last night and getting that girl. Not to mention all the other stuff that's been going on with him.

Levi looked down at me, "Where were you going?" 

"I was just-" 

"This idiot messing with-Oh it's you," Samuel said walking up to Levi and me. "He bothering you?" 

I looked back at Levi who had a blank expression on his face. He just ignored Samuel, "Here, I'm sorry everything's been so shitty lately." he said passing me the flowers to me.

"Thank you, Levi, um-" 

"If you want to leave I can call an uber that's how I got here," Levi told me.

"Oh, I have your car if you want it-" 

"You're not seriously going with this ass are you?" Samuel said cutting me off. 

"Sam-" 

"I'm sorry who are you?" Levi cut me off this time. 

"I'm the guy that's been taking care of F/n while you've been out playing Hollywood," Samuel snapped at him.

Levi took a step forward, but I put my hands up and stopped him, "Levi, stop." I already know how quickly aggravated Levi can get. And Samuel's got a temper too"It's fine Samuel I'll talk to you later." 

"Seriously," Samuel said looking uninterested. "You're such an idiot." 

"Who the fuck do you think you are-"

"Samuel just go okay?" I cut Levi of this time. I really didn't feel like them fighting.

Samuel just rolled his eyes and turned away. "Hit me up when you're not being a dumbass." 

Levi was about to say something to him, but I stopped him. "Levi it's fine." 

Levi looked at me a could see the frustration filling his eyes, "Who the hell was that? Was that the Samuel guy I keep hearing about?" 

"You've heard about him?" 

"That is him isn't it," Levi said. He started to walk after him, but I grabbed his arm.

"Can you not Levi." 

"I'm just going to give him a piece of my mind, I don't know how gave him the right to think he can talk to you." 

I shook my head, "How can you say that? You don't even know him." 

"And I don't care to know anything else, he's a bad influence on you," Levi told me.

"Excuse me? You don't-" 

"I don't want to do this here, are you going to come with me or go back to class?" Levi asked.

I felt myself getting angry, who does he think he is? Can't he come here and just give me an ultimatum like this? "I'll do whatever I want," I told him and pushed passed him to walk away, but before I could even get far, he had grabbed my arm. 

"F/n," He called me out.

"Let me go Levi." 

I heard him take in a deep breath, "I'm sorry, can we just talk?" 

"So you want to talk know? I thought you were to busy." I spat at him. I don't know why I was acting this way, but I was just getting angry thinking about him with someone else, and then popping up here with flowers like it was going to make everything better. 

"F/n let's just go home and talk, we haven't done that in a while. I don't want to argue." 

I took a deep breath, "Fine." 

Levi Pov

The air between us was painfully thick. 

It was as if we both a so much on our minds we didn't know where to even start. 

I just wanted to clear the air with her, tell her that I wasn't doing anything with Cira, that the show's producers were the ones making it look like I was dating her. That was was still in love with her, and I would never need anyone else. I needed to tell her everything was going to be alright, and she didn't want anyone else. That she didn't need this Samuel. That I was here for her now, and I didn't plan on leaving her again, she can stay with me. When I go back that's she's coming with me. 

It's been hard but I know it's going to be okay.

I looked over at her, we were going to make this work. 

But that's when I noticed something. 

She wasn't wearing her ring. 

I suddenly got this sick feeling, why wasn't she wearing it? I thought she always wears it. Then my mind played back what that loser said. He was taking care of her while I've been gone. 

Taking care of her how? She couldn't...I mean she's been vulnerable, and I've been gone. But she wouldn't. She loves me. 

I found myself getting more and more anxious; I have to ask her, but I don't want the answer. Not that I think she did anything with him, but the thought was enough to drive me crazy.

Once we got to the house we both sat in the driveway for a moment. 

"Are you okay?" She asked me. Tch, as if I was the one who has the issue. I looked over at her house. They already had an for sale out there. Seriously? Couldn't they wait any longer? There was just a murder there. 

"I've been better, how are you holding up?" 

"Peachy," She said. 

"Let's just get inside," I said getting out the car. 

We both got inside, and I saw F/n sit the flowers down on the table, but then she headed straight upstairs. I followed her into my room. Or I guess you could call it our room now. She had laid down on the bed facing away from me and pulled out her phone and started to look through it. I looked over her; she has lost a lot of wight. She doesn't look sick, but she doesn't look like herself either. 

"Tch, I thought we came here to talk?" 

"We've had a whole car ride, and you didn't say anything." 

Neither did you. 

Is what I want to say, but I really don't want to argue with her. 

"Just tell me what's wrong." 

"Nothings wrong," She said in what had to be the most annoying voice I've ever heard from her. 

I sighed, why did she have to be so difficult. I get it, she was going through a hard time because of her mother, and I'm not trying to rush the way she's greaving, I just don't know how to deal with her anymore. Especially when she's acting like this. "I know you called me last night, sorry-" 

"And your girlfriend answered," She said bitterly.

"I was afraid of that, look F/n." I sat moved my chair to face the bed so I could sit down and talk to her, it was time to clear the air. "That girl who answered is Cira. She has a crush on me and likes to mess with me all the time, but there isn't anything going on between us. She likes me, but that's it. And with that interview, I already told you that's the producer's work, and it's the same for those magazines it's not true. I don't like her; I love you." 

F/n didn't say anything. 

"Did you hear me?" 

"I heard you," F/n said. 

"But?" 

"I'm not sure if I believe you," She said sitting up and facing me. 

"Why not," I asked her, "I told you the truth? When have I ever lied to you?" 

"It's just hard seeing one thing and hearing you say another."

"Fine." I guess I couldn't blame her. "What have you been up too," 

"Nothing, just trying to live my life." 

"What's that supposed to mean?" 

"Just what it sounds like Levi." 

"What about this Samuel guy? What's the deal with him?" 

"He's just a friend."

"That's been taking care of you while I'm gone?" I couldn't help but say.

"What's that supposed to mean?" 

"He's the one who said, it. I just want to know what does that mean. And why you're not wearing your ring?" 

"Why don't you just come out and say it then Levi." F/n spat. 

I groaned, "I'm trying not to argue with you F/n." 

"Of course you're not. Why? Because you think I got enough stress already?" She asked.

"F/n I-" 

"No, I'm not cheating on you Levi." She snapped at me, "I can't believe you would even think I'd do something like that." I could see the tears forming in her eyes, "I've been hanging out with Sam, cause he's been there for me when you and everyone else has been acting like I'm some fragile doll, he's the only person who's been acting like I'm still a person." 

"And you know," F/n continued, "Despite everything, that I've seen I believed you wouldn't cheat either but hearing that girl answer your phone last night and you popping up here with those stupid flowers and accusing me only makes me feel like you're the one hiding something." 

"F/n-" 

"I don't want to hear it!" She yelled, "You, your mom, Mikasa, Isabel, Ymir, Furlan. You all act like because my mom is dead that I'm just this sad emotional mess. I'm not. I want to move on. All I wanted was to move on, and you all are just stuck. Stuck thinking I'm hurting and it only makes this worst And I fucking at hate it!" She screamed at me with tears in her eyes. 

I stood up to reach out for her, but she pushed passed me walking out the room.

I could only stand there alone. What was I supposed to say to her? I bet that's all the stuff she's been bottling up. But I felt bad, she was right. I was wrong to think she would do anything like that.

I was wrong to think of her like that. And I figured she didn't like the way she was being treated, but I didn't know it was this bad. We all- well, at least I knew I wanted to give her time to adjust, but being away from her didn't help. Shit. 

Your Pov

I hated this! 

I hated this so fucking much. 

How dare he! How dare Levi think I would ever cheat on him? What have I done to make him think I would even think of it. I took my ring off because I was mad at him, and didn't want to think about him today, but he should know I love him! He should know I would never do anything like that even if I was hanging out with another guy. He's the one who's been guilty. Girls answering his phone, saying he doesn't have a girlfriend. I have more reason to suspect him then he does for me. 

The nerve of him. 

I closed my eyes feeling so angry. Why would he-he's such an idiot. 

I walked outside, God. Everything is so fucked. And I feel like I just can't do anything about it. 

I looked at the for sale signs the one in front of my old house and Kuchel's. Everything is changing, and it's so fast. There isn't anything I can do to stop this. Why did it have to be this way? Couldn't I had died instead of her...

Just then a car pulled up.

It was Kuchel. I guess she was on her break and decided to come home.

I didn't want to see her though. I didn't want to see any of them. 

"F/n? you're home earlier everything okay?" She asked walking closer to me. 

"Everything is peachy," I spat out. 

"What's with the attitude?" 

"F/n!" 

I turned around and saw Levi standing at the door. What did he want? 

"Levi, hey," heard his mom say, "Did you two just get here?" 

"I don't feel like talking Levi," I told him.

"Two alright?" Kuchel asked.

"Let's just talk," Levi said to me.

God, he was annoying. "Why so you can accuse me of cheating again?" 

"I'm sorry alright, that was wrong of me to do-" 

"You can't apologize now! I'm upset with you, and I don't want to talk." 

Levi tilted his head looking at me walking closer.

"I said I don't want to talk le-" 

But before I knew it, Levi kissed me on the lips and pulled away. He leaned his head on mine, "We don't have to talk, we can just lazy around, we can eat something we can just watch tv, I don't care. I just want to be with you; I want to be there for you. I love you. Nothing has changed that. I was wrong to think what I did you have every reason to think I was with someone else, but I promise I wasn't. I've loved you since I was like ten nothing has ever and will ever change that." Levi heald my hands "I'm sorry everything has been shit lately, but not anymore. I'll be here for you. You can depend on me." 

"Levi-" I didn't know what to say to him. 

How was it he could say that, and somehow I feel somewhat at peace? What do I even say to him? I leaned my head on his shoulder. "Levi you idiot," 

"Yeah, I know, I'm an ass. A jerk and idiot...just forgive me." Levi told me.

I shook my head, "Damn you and you're stupid jerk face." I hugged him. "I love you, Levi...Nothing will ever change that. Just don't leave me agian...and don't treat me like a doll. I just want everything to go back to normal." 

"It will. I promise. It's just going to take time, but will make this work okay?" Levi told me. 

Just then we both turned our heads because we heard the car next to us startup, then we watched Kuchel pulled off.

"Tch, is she trying to ruin the moment?" 

I couldn't help but laugh, "I guess that was an awkward moment for her," 

Levi only clicked his tongue, "Let's just go inside and sleep? I'm tired from the flight, and I haven't cuddled with you in forever." 

I smiled at Levi. I don't know how hearing what he told me made me start to feel better, but I think we're going to be okay. I mean as long as I have Levi with me I know I'll be alright...I mean this is what couples do, they argue, but then they move past it. 

And so I know Levi, and I will move past this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> I know this chapter is a bit short but it had a little fluff in it so yay? 
> 
> Tell me how you liked this chapter? Do you think reader and Levi are going to be alright, or will something or someone ruin this??
> 
> xoxo


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter has some fluff and some angst
> 
> **WARNING**  
> This chapter does have a sexual abuses moment in it. If it's not for you or you're triggered by it please skip this chapter this has been your WARNING!!

Levi Pov

F/n was laying on my lap while I ran my fingers through her hair. It's been a week since I've been back and things haven't been exactly normal but their getting there. But all in all, everything is okay. 

I'm still worried about her though, But I won't voice it out loud to her. She's made it clear she wants to move on, and that's what I'll do as long as everything seems manageable, or at least until she says something. 

But who knows she might just actually be okay. She seems normal...The only thing really is now and then she'll jump out of her sleep. Like she was having a bad dream or something. I hate that she doesn't talk about it when it happens though I want to be there for her, but when that happens she'll just lay back down and won't say anything. 

To think she's most likely been having sleepless night like this by herself made me angrier at myself. I abandoned her when she really needed me.

But no more. 

I don't care what's going on F/n is staying with me. 

I think she was drifting off while we laid there together, I was just doing some light reading. 

"So the show comes on Friday?" F/n spoke up surprising me. 

"Yeah," I answered her.

"You sure you don't want to have like a viewing party?" 

"You want me to be honest?" 

"No lie to me." 

I snorted, "Yeah then, invite everyone, get my mom to make snacks and everything." 

F/n laughed, "Okay, okay, then just us?" 

"I really don't even want to watch it," I told her honestly.

"Serisouly?" 

I sat my book down. "Yeah, that show has been a pain in my side for a while now, I just want to be done with it." 

"But I want to see you on tv," She pouted. "At least let me see the full product of the thing that's tearing us apart," she joked.

"Oh, so you got jokes now?" 

F/n laughed again, "Well, at least for the next two days." 

"You're so fucking corny," I said shaking my head at her. I like that she can be her old goofy self sometimes.

"Yeah, but you love it," F/n said turning her body so she could look at me. I looked down at her. 

All I could think was that I really did. 

I don't think anyone could love anyone as much as I love F/n. I would literally do anything for her, Despite everything that has happened. I really think we're going to be okay. Like I already said it's just going to take time. But looking at her right now I love everything about her, and I wouldn't trade this for anything. Her smile, her eyes, the way she laughs at stupid things, the way overthinks about stuff, and I can always tell because of her eyebrows, and she swears they don't move. The way she gets annoyed when I won't play along with her stupid jokes. When she's clearly happy when I do go along with them. How she wants me to succeed in my own dreams and pushed me. The way she had an open heart even to the people who don't deserve it. The way she gets me like no one else could ever. 

I'm madly in love with her. 

"F/n?" 

"Si senor?" 

"Mar-" I paused. What was I saying? I shook my head, "Maybe we should go get something to eat? I'm hungry." 

F/n frowned, "I got the taste for something sweet, I guess." 

"We can get whatever, I'll pay," I told her.

F/n rolled her eyes getting up, "Okay Mr. Highroller Ackerman. I say we go out for cake and Ice cream." 

"Fine with me," I said. 

F/n got up and left to the bathroom I think, leaving me alone in our room.

I sighed. 

I almost asked her to marry me. What the hell was I thinking? I mean I want to marry her, there's not a chance that I won't ask her. But to do that now? I mean with her mom, plus this whole L.A. thing...It just isn't the time. But God did I want to. 

~Later~

Levi has been acting weird.

I mean not weird in the annoying way he was before. 

It's different somehow. 

I'm not sure if I like it, but I know I don't exactly hate it. 

It's kinda funny, he's being more affectionate but not so much that's it's alarming. Like he doesn't want to go overboard, but he'll still a kiss right when I'm not expecting. Or I'll catch him starring when I'm doing something. It's cute. Hell, it's almost like when we first started to date. 

Like I said it was cute, but something still about it is off. 

Right now I was just getting out of class. Levi should be with his advocate something about a scholarship he mentioned I think. He's done with all his classes, and since he's stupid smart, he's graduating like 3rd in our class. He's such an overachiever. But then again so am I I mean I'm graduating 12th in our class. I mean it's not as good as him but it's pretty darn good. Even in the last few months...I shook my head. All things considered, my mom would be proud. In just a few more weeks all this will be a distant memory.

Levi says once we graduate we're all moving to L.A.

I'm not too sure about all that though, I mean it sounds nice, but still to leave this place behind? This is home. It's been home all our lives. But if Levi is going to get more serious about acting, and have more seasons of his show then will have too. I mean Kuchel's already been looking for places to live out there. 

It's all happening so fast. 

"Heya (Nickname)" 

I looked over to see Bella and Furlan walking up too me. 

I don't know if Levi talked to them, but I'll say in the two weeks he's been back things have been kinda been going back to normal again. So they've been treating me like their friend again, and not the girl who just lost her mom. I kinda wonder if I just needed Levi here. 

"Sup," I told them.

"I heard Reiner's having a party tonight, It might be the last one he has until graduation," She told me.

"Oh, sounds exciting," I said not that really into it. I mean Parties are fun, but I'd rather stay home with Levi.

"Oi, you wanna go?" 

I turned at the sudden voice, Levi was walking up behind me. He rested his head on my shoulder still facing Furlan and Bella. "No, not really." 

"Me either," He answered.

"Besides Levi's show comes on tonight," I told them.

"But think about it F/n," Bella whined, "This might be the last party you go to in your young adult life, I'm sure they'll be reruns of Levi's show." 

"Sure, but it's his debut." I protested.

"Levi, you are hindering F/n's teenage life," Bella said. Making us all laugh, "And you're own if I'm honest, go to the party with us, it will be boring if it's just Furlan and be." 

"But think about it, what happens at like all the parties we go too? Levi and Furlan are always running around after us cause we drank too much and they're trying to make sure we don't get into trouble," I told her. 

"Okay, but how much fun do you think Furlan would have if it's just him? He needs his wingman Levi with him. And I need you." She said smiling. 

"How about we go for a little, and then we leave earlier?" Levi asked. "She won't leave us alone if we don't." 

I sighed, really just wanted to stay home and cuddle, "Sure," I gave in. Levi had a point, Bella can be so persistent sometimes, it's annoying. 

"Goody!" She jumped. "See you guys there then!" She then started to skip away with Furlan. 

"I have no idea how she always has that much energy," I said watching her leave. 

"Tch, as if you two don't act the same." 

I snorted a laugh, "I do not act like Bella." 

"You do too," Levi said raising his head from my shoulder and started to walk off. 

"You can't win an argument just by walking away!" I called after him.

"Looks like I am though." He said back as I caught up with him.

I rolled my eyes, "Anyway why are you agreeing to go to a party? You don't like to have fun," I teased him.

"Tch, I'd rather do that than sit at home and watch the show." 

"You really don't want to watch this show do you?" 

"How could you tell?" 

I huffed out some air; he's so stubborn.

We were on our way to my locker, but as we got closer to it, I could see someone standing there. 

It was Samuel. 

Wow, I haven't seen him since Levi got back. He hasn't even text me or anything; I wonder what he's been up too? I looked at Levi to see how he was going to react, cause thinking about it the last time they talked I felt like they almost got in a fight, I really hope nothing like that happens again. 

"Long time no see," I said getting closer to him. 

"Hey doll," He said with a smile on his face, but as soon as it seemed like he registered Levi he started to frown, "You're still hanging out with the runt?"

"How about you get lost," Levi snapped at him.

"Who the fuck are you talking too?" Samuel snapped back.

"Hey, hey!" I yelled at both of them. 

"Let's keep it civil?" 

I could feel Levi breathing heavy next to me. I should just get Samuel to leave. 

"Nows-" 

"I was coming over to ask if you wanted to hang out but seeing you're still being a dumbass with they cheater I can answer my own question," Samuel said standing up from leaning on my locker. 

"Look here I don't know who you are but, you're not going to talk to F/n like that why I'm here," Levi said to him stepping closer to Samuel before I could stop him. 

Samuel was a noticeable taller than Levi. But Levi didn't seem to care, I on the other hand did. Neither one of them needed to be in a fight. 

"If you keep thinking you're a tough guy you're about to find out just who I am," Samuel said stepping closer.

I pulled at Levi's arms. "Levi please."

I looked back at Samuel, "Can you go?" 

Samuel just stood there looking between the of us, "Just go Sam." 

He rolled his eyes, and started to walk off, "Fucking bitch," He mumbled. 

Levi started to lunge at him but I pulled at his arm, "Levi it's not worth it." 

Levi paused for a second but then he pulled away from me and started to walk the other way. 

"Levi?" 

He ignored me. 

"Levi where are you going?" 

He still ignored me. 

I sighed, And we were having such a beautiful day.

~~Later~~

Levi still wasn't talking to me. 

It was the afternoon and I had started getting ready to go to the party but he was still sitting there on the ned with earphones in. 

He's being childish. 

And he won't even tell me why he's upset. I mean I get it's about Samuel, but still, I mean it wasn't that bad. They both were being idiots today. 

"How about I wear this?" I asked pulling out this shirt that you could practically see though, I wasn't going to actually wear it out, but I wanted to get a reaction from Levi. But he didn't say anything.

I sighed, "Levi, please talk to me?" 

He didn't say anything. 

I walked over to him and pulled out one of the earphones, "Levi, you could at least tell me why you're mad," I told him finally having enough of this silent treatment. 

"I'm not mad at you," He said plainly.

"Right, and you've been ignoring me because you're happy with me." I snapped at him.

"Tch, it's not- I'm upset with you but I'm more angry with myself," He stated. 

"Why?" 

"You're really going to act like you don't know? The drug dealer, that's why F/n." He snapped.

I took a breath running my hands through my hair, "Levi, look I'm sorry-"

"I just don't see how you could talk to him," Levi said. I noticed his jaw tense up, "Just hearing the way he was talking to you today- It just pissed me off." 

"He's just a bit rough around the-" 

"Can you not defend him." 

I looked away, but then I looked back at Levi and sat down in front of him, "Listen to me, Levi. When it comes down to it, he's the only reason why I'm doing better now." 

"What's that-" 

"What I mean is what I said before," I but Levi all and started to explain myself, "Samuel treated me like a regular person when I needed it. Yes, he's a bit rough, and he's had a harder background than us, but at the end of the day I think he has a good heart, I mean he really helped me." 

Levi didn't say anything.

"If anything you should thank him, who knows what I would have done if he never started talking to me." 

"Don't talk like that," Levi said. 

"It's true though," I looked down at my hands. "I was just so angry and frustrated, and sad I was going through so much I wished it was me instead-" 

"Please stop talking like that F/n," Levi said cutting me off. He moved closer and rested his head on my shoulder, "I should have been here, it should have me to talk to you, I'm sorry." 

"Levi-" 

"Forgive me." 

I wrapped my arms around him, "It's fine. I don't blame you." 

Levi hugged me back, "I love you." 

I smiled, I loved Levi so much. 

Then I made some random growling noise. Levi pulled back with this what the fuck face.

I immediately started laughing, "I'm sorry it was just getting to tense, I wanted to lighten the mood." 

"Tch," Levi rolled his eyes, "More like ruined it.

I kept laughing thinking about the face Levi just made; it was hilarious. After a moment I got my composure back, while he just sat there waiting. 

I rubbed the tear from my eye, "I love you too Levi." I kissed him on the lips, "I love everything about you Levi, and I don't blame you for anything. The only thing I blame you is for being too perfect." 

I looked back at him. I looked deeply into his eyes; I'd do anything for him. He just completes my whole life. Nothing would be the same without him. Even if Sam was a big help when I was greaving, he could never replace Levi.

Levi smiled at me, "We don't have to go to the party if you don't want to, It might just be more fun staying here." 

Thought about it for a moment, it would be a lot more fun to just lay up here with Levi. "Bella will have a fit if we don't show up," 

Levi took a deep sigh, "Fine, will stay but for like five minutes just to make her happy." 

"Sounds like a plain." 

Levi Pov

When F/n and I got to Reiner's house, and it was already packed.

I really didn't want to do this, part of why I suggested it this morning was one, because I didn't want to stay home and watch the show with my mom and Mikasa, and two I thought it would be something nice for F/n to do to keep her mind off things.

Seems to be working, as of right now, she's over there in the living room dancing with Bella. And unlike Bella, she isn't drunk. So that's good. She's having a nice time without anything making her. 

"So you really leaving after school?" Furlan asked me. I was telling him about our plans after we graduate.  
I shrugged, "That's the plan." 

"You'll visit, right? Isabel will be so sad if you don't." 

I snorted, "If I don't I'm sure she'll just pop up there." 

Furlan laughed, "That does sound likes something she would do." 

I laughed thinking about it."We'll visit for sure; I think F/n would like it if we did now and then." 

"You don't have to, but at least invite us to the wedding," Furlan joked.

I shook my head, "Right, as long as you invite us to yours." 

"Don't try and act like you don't think about it Levi, I bet in the yearbook they have a most likely to be married it would be the two of you." 

"Tch," I rolled my eyes, "We didn't even start dating till this school year." 

"Sure, you know no one believes that right?" Furlan laughed.

I rolled my eyes at him and looked back where F/n was but she wasn't there and neither was Bella. 

"Where did they go now?" Furlan said under his breath.

"Remember this is what you're girlfriend considered fun," I told him feeling a bit annoyed I lost track of F/n. Although I wasn't that worried about her since I know, she wasn't drinking. 

"Bella!" Furlan called out, I looked in his direction and he was trying to run through the crowned to get to Bella who looked like she was about to drink a bottle of perfume. I shook my head; she really shouldn't drink. 

I was about to look upstairs when I heard my name called out; I looked over thinking it was F/n, but instead I was met with Petra. 

Well, this is a face I haven't seen in a while. 

"Hi," 

"Hey," She said with a pleasant smile on her face, "It's um, it's been a while." 

I nodded, "It has." In my mind, I would really like to talk to her about getting her pregnant, but I remember how much F/n begged me not to say anything to her about it. Besides what could I do about it now. 

"How's that show you've been working on been?" She asked. 

I shrugged, "It's fine." This was awkward.

Petra must have picked up on the same vibe, "Er, Um...I haven't seen F/n in a while; I heard what happened to her mom. I'm really sorry." Now it was even more awkward.

"Yeah," Was all I could say.

Petra shook her head, "Well, I just saw you and wanted just to say hi, it's been a while." 

I nodded at her, "Right, I'll see you." 

Petra nodded back, and waved and started to walk away. It was almost there was something else she wanted to say but decided against it. I wonder if it was about the baby? I shook my head like I said; there's nothing I could do about it now.

I started my search for F/n again, If Bella was by the steps, then F/n shouldn't be that far. But it was so many people in here. I know Reiner's parents gotta get mad when he does this. Or do they have maids or someone who comes in and cleans up? I guess I'll never know. 

I was starting to get frustrated as I looked around the room and still couldn't find F/n. Where did she go? I walked in the kitchen still looking for her once I see her I think it's time we head out, There's just too many people here. I was just about to leave the kitchen when I finally spotted her, but then I instantly felt a rush of anger run through me when I saw who she was with. 

The drug dealer. 

Why does he seem to just pop up places?

I started to strut over there. I didn't like him talking to her; I didn't like the way he talked to her, everything about him pissed me off; not to mention made me mad at myself. I should have been the one here for her, not him. She shouldn't have anything to do with a person like him, and if I were here, she wouldn't have. Another reason I was mad at the show. 

As I got closer to them, I could see F/n looked uncomfortable. I wonder if he said anything absurd again, or maybe she was worried I would fight him. I took a deep breath. I need to calm myself before I get over here. I don't like him, but I do have to remember he did help her when I couldn't...for that, I can be grateful, but that doesn't mean I like him. Plus I'm here now, so there's no more need for him.

"F/n," I called out to her once I was close enough to her. 

F/n worry clearly in her eyes, "Levi." 

"Ready to go?" 

F/n looked from me to him, the worry never leaving her face, God, did she think I was going to fight him that bad? Maybe I need to calm down more. I'm not even that violent anymore. 

"Actually Levi can you give me a minute?" She asked. 

I glanced at Samuel, at least I think that's what his name is. But then I ignored him. The longer I look at him, the angrier I get. I looked back at F/n, "Can't we go already?" 

"Just give me a sec, Levi. Okay, just go wait by the car I'll be out." She said smiling this time, "Please," she then added.

"Fine," I told her walking away. 

I didn't want to leave her there, but I don't want her thinking I don't trust her with other guys either, and it's not that I don't believe in her. I just don't trust him. But F/n did say how he helped her and that she thinks he's a good person when it comes down too it. Now not to say I'll be his best friend, but I will chill out. I don't have a reason to fight him...tonight. 

Your Pov

I sighed in relief when Levi started to walk away. He was safe.

Samuel had a gun, and he was very drunk.

I had went into the kitchen to see if there was anything to drink that didn't have alcohol in it, but when I got here I Samuel leaning on a wall. I had only gone to say hi, and apologies for Levi from this morning. But now things had turned around so fast. 

Next thing I knew he had started talking to me about how he didn't like Levi, and how I should leave him and go out with him. I could smell the alcohol on his breath, so I was going to ignore him and just go back to Levi when I did Samuel pulled me back to him, and then when I tried to move again, he lifted his shirt showing the gun in his pants.

I was frozen in place from that moment. 

No one else seemed to notice. 

"Let's go somewhere else and talk doll," Samuel said way to close to myself. 

It will be alright, just don't give him a reason to do anything crazy. That's what I had to keep telling myself. Levi was safe. That was my top priority, now to just get him out of here, so no one else was at risk.

I took a deep breath; I could do this. 

I know Samuel, he's not the type to hurt anyone. He's just drunk right now. 

I followed him outside the back door. I guess it was a good thing Levi and I parked up front and down the street. At least I know he's safe up there somewhere and not here trying to be a hero. 

We got to Samuel's car. "You know I should head back, my friends might be looking for me," I told him. We were at his car now. There were a few people outside but not as many that were inside, plus it was dark so I don't know how many of them could see us over here. I really didn't care; I just wanted not to be here. 

"We didn't even talk get in," Samuel said standing at the driver side of the door. 

"I shouldn't-" 

"I said get in," He said in a harsher tone, that made me obey. 

We both sat in his car, and this had to be the scariest thing that has ever happened. I honestly don't think I've ever seen a gun in real life, but giving the little things, I do know about Samuel...I don't think it's fake...

"You know you're really pretty doll," He said moving his hand, so it was behind me. 

I swallowed.

"I should really be ge-" 

"Back to that cheater? Whas so great about him anyway?" He asked with his words slurring. 

"Samuel, please," I said trying to keep my composure. I was scared; I don't know what was going to happen to me. 

"Shh, don't cry," He told me using his finger to wipe my face, I hadn't even realized that tears were starting to run down my face, I just wanted to leave so bad. I couldn't think about anything else. 

But then I felt his lips on my neck. I wanted to gag, I pushed him away, "No, Samuel." But then he grabbed my leg with a tight grip.

"Quit moving." 

But I still fought against him, "Let me go!" 

Next thing I knew his hand went to his waist again pulling out the gun and he put up next to the steering wheel. I froze again. So it was get shot or this...

So I just shut my eyes and prayed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Leave kudos and comments, please!! Tell me what you think about the story! I'd like to know. 
> 
> xoxo


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **WARNING**  
> This chapter does have a Mention of a sexual abuses moment in it. If it's not for you or you're triggered by it please skip this chapter this has been your WARNING!!

Levi Pov

It's been a minute since I left F/n with that guy. 

I wasn't worried about her, or at least that's what I'm trying to convince myself. But something just wasn't sitting right with me. I shook my head, no she wanted me to wait for her, I need to show her I trust her because I do. 

So that's what I did. 

But God, why did she have to take so long.

I looked at my phone; it had been like ten minutes. 

I sighed if it gets to Fifteen before she's out here, I'll go back. 

Your pov

"Are you going to come inside?" 

Samuel spoke words to me, but I wasn't comprehending them. "Whatever just come in when you're ready," Then I think he left.

I was sitting in his car alone now. 

He brought me here when he was done. 

I think I might have preferred him to shoot me. This-this is far worse. 

I folded into myself. This was humiliating. Why didn't I fight back? Why did I just sit there and take it...

I was pulling at my hair screaming.

I've never felt this disgusting in my life, the humiliation, the guilt the fear...I couldn't handle it. I wanted to die. I wanted to be anywhere but here. 

Why me.

Levi Pov

Two days.

Two days F/n has been missing.

When I went back into the house to her, she was nowhere to be found. No one knew where she went either. I even waited till everyone cleared out. I looked everywhere for her, but I couldn't find her. 

The last person she was with was that guy, but no one knew anything about him either. I can't even find out where he lives. 

My mom and I went to the police, but they didn't even care. They said she's eighteen so there wasn't much they could do. That if it was longer then a week, then they try again. 

This was my fault. 

I shouldn't have left her. 

I should have stayed, and said to hell that she wanted to talk to that guy, I should have fucking been in there with her, and now I don't have a clue where she's at. It's not like her just to disappear. She hasn't even left a call. Even when I call her now all I get is the voicemail. I hate this hopeless feeling. 

How was it no one knew where she went. 

"Levi are you up?" My mom said knocking on the door. 

"Yes," I called out. 

My mom opened it and looked over at me as I was sitting at my desk. 

"Did you go to sleep at all?" 

"No, I'm waiting on her to call me back," I told her.

"Levi, don't you think you might be overreacting?" She asked me, "I mean when you weren't here she wouldn't come home sometimes." 

I shook my head, "No. This isn't the same." 

"How do-" 

"She didn't have any reason not to come home. We were doing fine; we were happy she wasn't upset-" 

"Maybe she's not upset, Levi-" 

"This isn't like her, mom!" I yelled. 

My mom went quite. 

I didn't mean to yell at her, but this was so frustrating. F/n isn't the type to just disappear. Something is wrong, and I'm the only one worried about it. I sighed, "I'm going to school today, maybe she'll be there." 

I heard my mom take a deep breath, "I get it, you're worried, but remember F/n is her own person. And with what just happen it's only natural that sometimes she might need a moment to herself. We can't ever understand what she's going through." 

"I know that," I told her.

My mom sighed again, "Then when she does come back, just remember that. Don't be hard on her." After that, my mom walked away. I think she went to finish getting ready to go to work. 

I rubbed my face. F/n needed space?

I shook my head, no. That wasn't the case. We were doing fine. We had just been talking about how we loved each other. Everything was fine. Something was wrong. It had something to do with Samuel. But why would she leave with him? I had so many questions. Most of all though was I wanted to know where she was. Why didn't she answer my calls? Was she really with him?... I couldn't but help but wonder...I know she said she wouldn't-no. I have to believe in her, but still...does he make her happier then I could...I mean she's pointed out that he was the one here for her- No. F/n isn't like that.

Right?

Your Pov

"He's not going to want you now, ya know?" Samuel said. 

I was standing by the door to outside. I wanted to leave. He had me trapped her for what felt like forever. When I asked him to leave he ignored me. And when I tried to leave he hit me. I've never been this scared in my life. But at this point, I didn't care anymore. I just wanted to get out. 

"Just let me go, Samuel." 

"Tch, we can go pick up your shit, I already told you. You don't belong there with them." 

I was digging my nails into my arms, "I'm going home, and staying there." I told him. But my feet where planted still. 

I felt him looking at me, I heard him sigh out loud, "You're not still mad about the other night are you?" 

I didn't say anything.

"I told you I was sorry, I was drunk and needed someone, my dad was being a dick."

I didn't want to think about the other night. What he did...What I let him do to me...I just wanted to go home; I wanted to wake up from this nightmare.

I heard him laugh, and watched him get up from his couch and walk over to me, "You're cute when you get all stubborn doll." 

I closed my eyes. Once I felt that he stopped walking I opened them again to see he was still pretty far from me, but then he started laughing harder, "But like I already said you're damaged goods now, Hollywood isn't going to want you now." 

It's not true. 

"I don't know why you still care, we both know he's got girls out there already." 

That's not true.

"He can get any hooker he wants, why would he want to keep you? You're not even that special." 

That's not true.

"Once he sees you he'll know we've been having fun, over here." Samuel laughed. 

"Shut up," I told him.

It wasn't true. 

"After that why would he want to deal with you?"

"Shut up!" I yelled this time. 

But then I felt my head slammed back at the door. Instantly feeling the pain. Samuel had a fist full of my hair, "You get me all hot and bothered when you get like this." 

"Please no," I cried. 

Not again. I couldn't do it again. 

"I don't get why you wanna go back to them so bad," Samuel said pulling away. "You're the one who said they didn't understand you anymore, and I was the only one who got you. What changed?" 

I fell to my knees. I hated this. I hated this so much! Where was Levi? Why hasn't he got here to save me yet? 

"But it's cool; I'm still here for you. We can go get your stuff now since you want to leave so bad," Then without saying anything else, Samuel walked out the door. 

I stayed on the floor. Shaking in fear. I hated this. I hated him. I hated myself. In the pit of my stomach, I felt so sick. What would Levi say? If he's home? What do I tell him? That I let another guy...That I cheated. What is he going to think? 

Death would be better than having to face anyone at this point. Death would be better than his humiliation. What would Kuchel, Mikasa think of me? I sat there I didn't fight. My mind went back to the moment. I wanted to throw up again. 

Why was this happening to me?

 

Levi Pov

"You still haven't heard anything from her?" Furlan asked.

"I wouldn't be fucking asking you if I had," I snapped at him.

"Sorry," He mumbled. 

No one still heard anything from her. I don't know why I thought she might come to school, but, F/n never skips. But then again, she isn't the same person since her mom died. I've tried to deny it, but it's the truth. She isn't, not to mention I know she's still holding stuff in. I just haven't said anything about it since she said she didn't want to talk about it. I've tried to respect her wishes. I've just been trying to make her happy.

But now she's gone. And most likely she's with that guy. 

I saw Ymir and Christa walking through the hall, and walked over to them. I haven't asked them if they heard from her yet since they weren't at the party."Oi, either of you hear from F/n?" I asked them.

Ymir smirked at me, "F/n, finally got tired of you shortie?" 

"I'm not joking I haven't seen her since Friday night," I told her.

"You dead ass?" Ymir asked looking at me. Then she shook her head, "No, I haven't." 

"Shit," I said under my breath. "Wait, you smoke. Do you know anything about that guy she was hanging out with?

Ymir shook her head, "No, Sorry." 

Lot of help they were. I turned away and started walking off. No one knew anything. I was getting so pissed. I just wanted a fucking answer. I'm just going to go home. If F/n is going to go anywhere, it will be there. I'll wait for her. I checked my phone to see if she sent me anything.

Nothing. 

Fuck, I just want a fucking answer. 

~Later~ 

I got home feeling tired. Maybe staying up these last few days are taking a toll on me. 

As I walked into my house and put my keys down, I started to hear some noise upstairs. F/n? I immediately thought, so I ran upstairs and opened my door sure enough there she was. Relief washed over me; she was finally back. But then I noticed the trash bag she had in her hand and the clothes that were in her hand. 

Was she packing?

"Where are you going?"

Your Pov

~Ealier~

Samuel pulled up to the house.

"Be quick. Imma ride around." 

I wasn't coming back. I was going to get into the house and call the police. This was my chance. Levi...he'll understand...I can only pray that he would...He won't hate me for this. He loves me. I have to keep telling myself that. Levi doesn't care what it is. He'll love me through anything.

I was about to hurry out the car, but I felt Samuel grip me on my leg. 

"Don't do anything stupid." 

I didn't look at him; he wouldn't know. 

"If you do, it's over for you and him," He told me. I could see where the gun was in his pants. So he brought it. 

"I like you F/n. And you're mine now," He said moving over and kissing me on the cheek, "So be a good girl, get your stuff and let's be done with this, let's be happy." 

"Or?" I asked.

Samuel chuckled, "Or I'll kill him, or at least get one of my guys to do it." 

I felt sick on the stomach. 

I don't doubt him for a second. 

He would kill Levi if I didn't come with him. 

Why did this have to happen to me? Wasn't I already going through enough? Did God hate me?

Did I really not have a choice? Because I'll choose Levi, I couldn't live in a world Levi wasn't alive in. I'll choose Levi over myself anyway.

"Now hurry up," Samuel said. 

I got out of the car, and he zoomed away. 

I don't think I have a choice at all.

I had to leave Levi.

I had to leave Levi, Kuchel, and Mikasa to keep them safe.

I started to cry. This wasn't fair. 

I started to walk to the house. I didn't even have my key. But then I remembered we keep an extra one under one of the rocks. I went to get it, then got in the house. 

Was this really going to be my last time here? This couldn't be it. This just couldn't be it. It's not supposed to be this way...But if I don't, he'll kill him. I have to protect him. I have to. I gotta hurry. I should just be glad they're not home. I went into the kitchen and grabbed a bag. I have do this. And quick or I won't do it at all and Levi will be at risk. I don't know how many people Samuel knows, and I know he'll do something crazy...I've already had a taste of it myself. 

But what will Levi think? Me just disappearing? I shook my head. He'll be okay. He has his family. They'll move to L.A. and move on they'll forget about me. I mean it's not like I've been the best since my mom died...less stress on Kuchel...

I started to cry harder. I didn't want to do this. I shouldn't have to do this. Why did I ever have to meet Samuel?

It was getting hard to see my stuff that was in Levi's closest. I didn't need to take everything...Just enough. Maybe one of his hoodies...I want to keep something of Levi's...

"Where are you going?" 

I froze. 

Why was he here now? 

I whipped my face. He couldn't see I was crying he'll worry. He'll figure something out. He can't know or Samuel will-

I didn't say anything to him; I just kept moving, I have to hurry now. 

"F/n where have you been? What are you doing?" Levi asked. 

I didn't say anything.

"Shit, I've been worried. You've been gone for two whole days no call nothing, what's the matter?" 

That's how long I was gone? It felt longer. 

"F/n," He called my name again.

Levi wasn't going to let up till he got some answers. 

If I was ever going to act out of a situation, I guess this was it. I wanted to die, but I wanted Levi to be safe first.

"I'm breaking up with you Levi." 

Those words I spoke broke my heart. I couldn't even say them and look at him.

Levi didn't say anything for a second, "Wait, what did you just say?" 

Now or never. I turned and looked at him, "I don't want to be with you anymore, I'm leaving." 

Levi walked closer to me, "The fuck you are. What the hell are you talking about F/n." 

I shook my head I couldn't look him straight in the eye, "It's over, let me just get my stuff." 

"Where is this-What- where will you go" Levi was looking so confused. I don't think I've ever seen these many emotions run through his face, "Is that a fucking hickie on your neck?" He snapped grabbing my arms and pulling me closer. 

I got that sick feeling again. I wanted to throw up. He left marks on me? I didn't know...I haven't even been able to look in the mirror. 

"You-" Levi's voice cracked, "You were with him." 

I couldn't hold back the tears. If only he knew.

"I'm sorry it was a mistake," I lied. 

Levi stepped back from me, the look of pain that was on his face stabbed me in the heart, and I don't think I'd ever forget it. "Explain to me F/n. What the hell is going through your head." 

I looked away from him, why was I making this so hard. If I stay, he'll die. "Levi I have to go." 

"Marry me," Levi said. 

"What?" 

Levi shook his head and walked closer to me again, "I don't care. We can work through this. Just marry me, we can move to L.A. we can move on. We can forget this whole thing ever happened your mom, him. Anything you want just doesn't leave me. Marry me F/n." 

I started crying harder. 

"I can't marry you, Levi." 

"Why not? Isn't that what we planned? What changed?" 

"I just can't." 

"I thought this is what you wanted? You wanted me." 

"Things change Levi." 

"They don't have too- fuck, Just stay. Move to L.A. with me."

"I don't want to go to L.A. I just want to l-" 

"We don't have to go; we can go where ever you want we can stay here. I don't care," Levi pleaded. 

"No, you have your mom and Mikasa. I'm fine here." 

"Bullshit. This isn't you F/n." 

"You don't know me anymore Levi." 

"Yes I do, don't tell me what I don't know, what will you do without me? Where are you trying to go?" 

Before I could answer I heard a beep from outside; no doubt it was Samuel. 

"I have to go," I told him. I didn't have any more time. I had to get out of here for Levi's sake. 

"Is that him? Are you leaving to stay with him." 

I looked away from Levi again this time picking up my bag, "Yes."

Levi didn't say anything.

"Do you love him?" 

No, I didn't, and I would never. 

"Yes." I lied. 

I heard the beep again. 

This was it. 

I was walking out the door, but Levi called out for me again.

"Don't do this," I looked back to see he was facing away from me. 

I had to though, I had to do this for him. 

"I'm sorry Levi, I just-I just can't do this anymore-" 

"F/n-" 

"Please don't look for me either." 

"This can't-" 

"This is what I want. Goodbye Levi." 

Then I walked out of his room. 

And out of his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading.
> 
> What will happen now? Will Levi leave it at this or will he confront Samuel? What will Samuel do? 
> 
> Ps. Someone's birthday is coming (mine) and a nice gift would be a comment or a kudo so how about it?


	31. Chapter 31

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter!!! 
> 
> **WARNING**  
> This chapter does have mentions of a sexual and drug abuses in it. If it's not for you or you're triggered by it please skip this chapter this has been your WARNING!!
> 
> The song in this chapter is Higher by Rihanna if you like to listen to it it's in the playlist https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2kBd98ZbURnhuH4T68ukRt
> 
> Just copy and paste!

5 YEARS LATER

"News of, 25-year-old Levi Ackerman has been cast in a new thriller that's set to be to be released in next winter. He'll be working under director Mori Walter, who's known to make critically acclaimed movies for the past ten years. Longtime fans of Ackerman will remember he started his debut in the hit American supernatural drama television series: Ages. There he played the lead with his now girlfriend, Cira Nickum. The two started dating back in the first season and have been one of Hollywoods hottest cu-" 

I turned the TV off. I didn't want to hear that. Whenever I heard anything about how well he was doing, It put me in a mood. That girl he's with...that should be me.

"Hey, I was watching that!" 

"Go home Franz," I told him while I was trying to clean up the house. 

"What's up your ass?" He mocked me. 

I heard Sam start laughing, "You know she gets all butt hurt when Hollywood gets on TV." 

I ignored them. 

"Aw, I'm just joking doll," Sam kept laughing. 

I rolled my eyes, "I'm ready to leave." 

Sam shook his head, "Wanna hit before we go?" 

I sighed, anything to get rid of this guilt feeling. "Sure." 

If only Levi saw me now If only he saw how far I've fallen. I'm sure he'd hate me. 

Levi Pov

"This club is lowkey," Furlan told me.

"You said that about the last one," I told him, as we walked the street. 

"Okay but that one was downtown, no one is out here, this place has never been hot, you know that," Furlan argued.

"Nobody had better been following us," I mumbled out to Furlan as we walk into the Club he was talking about. 

It was late in the night, or early morning as Mikasa would say now. Furlan and I were just going out to enjoy a club without all the paparazzi. It was apart of my life now, but that didn't mean I liked it. If anything that was the one thing I hated most people always. But it was good I was back here. 

Home.

Well, not really home anymore. Home for me now was L.A. but this was the usual time in the year I would come down here and visit Furlan. This was my little vacation spot now, not to mention there are a lot fewer chances to run into the paparazzi here than in L.A.

Looking inside the club, it had an older fill to it. I liked it. Dark lights everywhere. It was an older crowd there too, but it still had some younger people mixed in. Everyone seemed to be minding their own business. There was even a live band playing; it was more of a lounge than anything. I chuckled a little, Furlan actually found a place that wasn't a shit hole. 

"See I told you this place was good." 

"Yeah, you come here a lot?" I asked him.

"No, A friend from work mentioned it. This is my first time here." 

I looked at him, "Then how did you know it was going to be okay?" 

"I just hoped it would," Furlan laughed. 

I rolled my eyes, "Asshole. There could have been paparazzi everywhere." 

Furlan was still laughing, "Would you relax? Did we come out to have a nice time? You leave back to L.A. when? In four days? Why not just sit back. Cira isn't here, enjoy yourself." 

"So I can't enjoy myself when she's around?" 

He rolled his eyes, "You know how she gets." 

Cira was my girlfriend. They had met once when I had brought her down here one Christmas to visit him, they didn't exactly get along, but Cira doesn't really get along with that many people, he had more of an aggressive personality, and not everyone can handle it. 

"Right, how she gets. She still trying to get you to pop the question?" He asked smirking while we both sat at the bar. He motioned for the bartender and ordered out drinks. 

"Tch, Yes. But not yet." It's been a while since we've been dating and Cira wants to get married, but now-now just isn't the right time. So much is going on in our careers, I think it's still too earlier. 

Furlan turned back to me, "What are you waiting on? Movie number five? How many have you been in now?" 

"I thought we came out here to have a nice time and not talk about our shity lives?" 

Furlan put his hand up in defense, "You right," We both went to drinking after that. 

It was nice. I really needed this, some time to just mellow out. Especially with this new movie getting ready to start filming. It should take about 18 weeks too? I know I'll have a shit ton to get to when I get back. Not to mention my moms birthday is coming up. I need to just take these next four days and relax as much as possible.

I closed my eyes thinking to myself, as I sipped my drink. It really was rare to have moments like this. 

"And I know I could be more creative. And come up with poetic lines," I heard a girls-no woman's voice singing. I listened to the music whoever was singing had some pipes on her. I meet a lot of singers, and I've ever worked with a few, but something about this girls voice struck a chord with me. 

"You take me higher, Higher than I've ever been, babe," She sang. 

It was almost familiar. 

Then I opened my eyes and looked toward the stage. I stared, then I had to close them for a second, maybe I was seeing things. I opened them again, no I wasn't seeing things. This wasn't my imagination. 

It was F/n.

Your Pov

Once I finished the singing a few of the club goers started to clap, and cheer making me smile. 

This was one if not the only thing I actually enjoyed about my life...I didn't like it when I was younger, but Levi always said I had this crazy amazing voice. And when I was first with Samuel I would just sing to myself, trying to think of better times; and it would work. Eventually, I started doing it in a few random clubs Samuel had business going through in. 

And I guess Levi was right, because for the most part whenever I do sing everyone stops and listens. It's a nice feeling...

I got off the stage and went to the bar. I wanted a drink before I had to deal with any of Samuel's clients. 

"Usual?" Katie, the bartender, asked me.

"Yeah," I told her leaning on the bar. 

"That was a nice song you did earlier, the short one, you write it?" She asked me.

I tried to smile at her, "Er, yeah." In truth, it was a sad song I wrote. It was a song I sang whenever I was missing Levi too much. Whenever I would get mad, or depressed about how different our lives ended up. And hearing that entertainment news earlier today really put me in a mood. I honestly didn't feel like making Sam any money tonight...but I also don't want to deal with an angry Samuel. 

This was just the deck of cards I was dealt. 

"F/n?" I heard my name called out. I felt fear wash over me. There weren't too many people who knew my name, at least my real name, and It couldn't be any of Sam's guys no matter how long I've known them they haven't even bothered to learn my name.

I turned and felt a wave or shock, "Furlan?" 

"Wow, it is you." He said smiling and hugging me. 

"What? Wha-How are you?" I asked with a sincere smile after seeing an old friend. Surprisingly it's been a while since I've seen anyone. Let alone, someone, I was close to like Furlan. I looked over him. He had grown a beard and everything, he looked way more mature since the last time I saw him, hell, he was a grown man. 

"Good, good. I heard the voice on the stage and knew it was you I had to say hi. It's been forever how are you?" He asked.

Disgust. . 

That's what washed over me, disgusted at myself. "Oh, I've been fine." I lied. 

"That's good to hear," He said smiling at me, "I was just actually here with-" 

"You still got some good pipes on you." 

I heard another voice said and I think my heart stopped. 

Furlan stepped to the side, and lord behold was Levi sitting there at the bar. 

I took a step back. 

I think I almost fell to my knees. 

I was out of breath, "Le-Levi." It was nearly a whisper I spoke so low.

"Hi, F/n." 

I couldn't believe it. 

Levi Pov

F/n stood there staring at me. 

Despite all the emotions seeing her bought up, I wanted to smile. 

It had been five years since I've seen her last. 

"How are you?" 

"I-I-ugh, I'm- I'm fine." She stuttered. 

I wanted to ask her something else, anything else but I was at lost of words myself. I didn't even know where to start it had been five fucking years since I've seen her. 

"I should go," Then she started to walk off.

"F/n wait!" I called out to her before I could even register what I was saying. I didn't care what was going on, but I didn't want her to leave. Not again. 

F/n turned to me, "It was great, wonderful seeing you, but I really need to leave." Then without saying anything else, she walked out. 

Your Pov

I couldn't think. 

All I could do was move. I had to move out of there. I had to get out; I needed to get away from Levi. Or he would know. 

He would know what I've been doing, and he would hate me more then I hated myself. 

I couldn't let him see how far I had fallen. I couldn't live with that. I couldn't let him; I couldn't live with him going back to Kuchel and Mikasa and telling them. 

I walked out back to where I knew Samuel would be. 

"You finish playing your silly games?" He asked. He was talking about my singing. He thought it was pointless, but he would still let me do it from time to time since it made me happy. If I wasn't doing that; then I was with him, doing his work.

"Samuel I'm not really feeling well tonight get one of the other girls," I told him walking to the car door.

But he put his hand up blocking my way, "Come again." 

I sighed rubbing my head, "I've had a hard night alright? I just want to lay down." 

"You can lay down when I say you can lay down," He barked. 

"It's just one night," I told him getting frustrated. 

"It's just money doll." He said looking down at me. 

I hated this. I hated this so fucking much. 

"I'm not fucking anyone tonight." I snapped at him throwing my arms in the hair. 

"Who the fuck are you talking to Bitch," Samuel snapped back grabbing my hair. 

"Get off me!" I yelled back. 

This was my relationship with Samuel. He was my pimp. He told me what to do, and I obey. And when I didn't- when I tried to fight back, thinking I was still a human with her own choices he reminded me just how wrong I was. This was my life now. .And I hated every second of it. 

If Levi saw me like this, he'd be so disappointed in me. He'd ask why didn't I fight back. The same question I asked myself almost every night but could never get an answer to. So I just settled. This was it, and it wasn't going to get any better.

Levi Pov

I stood there blinking. 

Did I just lose her again? It wasn't even a minute. Why was she in such a rush? Did seeing me make her that upset? She didn't even want to talk? She talked to Furlan, but she couldn't talk to me? Why did she hate me?

"Are you seriously going to let her leave like that?" Furlan asked hitting my shoulder. 

"Wha-"

"Go out there after her you idiot." He snapped at me. 

Shit, he was right what the hell was I doing just standing here? I rushed outside hoping she didn't go too far. 

I looked down both sides of the street and didn't see her. Fuck! What was I thinking? I let her go. I didn't even fight to see her! What was wrong with me?

"Fine sleep outside then bitch," I heard a male voice say from an ally. 

I guess this wasn't the best side of town. I should get back inside. I can't believe I let her go again. I can just come back tomorrow she might be back, or I'll ask the bartender. I have to t-

"Babe come o-" 

Then I heard a loud smack. Shit, whoever that was must be in pain. I shook my head; I should just ignore it. As I started to talk back to the bar, I saw the car drive out of the alleyway. I guess he left the girl there. Poor girl, I bet no one is there to help her either.

I heard a loud cry from the same direction. 

I really need to leave this alone. I should be worried about F/n. 

But what if? 

No, that's the case. 

But what if it was her? I sighed this was going against my better judgment, but someone has to help. I walked over to the ally and saw a woman sitting on the ground crying. It was dark outside, so I couldn't really see them that well, "You alright?" 

They stopped crying, "I'm fine," they snapped. 

But that's when I realized whose voice it was. 

"F/n? Shit." I ran to her.

"Get away from me!" She screamed fighting away from me and accidentally hitting her head on the building. Fuck, that had to hurt. She held her face wincing out in pain. I held the back of her head, looking at her face, she looked like she was going in and out of it. 

Fuck.

"F/n stay with me," 

"Le-" But before she could get my name out, she passed out. 

I pulled out my phone, and set up an uber then picked her up. 

So many thoughts were running through my head right now but what stood out the most was rage. I almost left her out here alone. 

I held her close to my chest and looked down on her, I let her go once, but not this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Raise your hand if you knew or had a strong feeling there was going to be a time skip? If not did I really surprise you? 
> 
> Also, I've been told this story is really angst a few times now, and while yes I agree (Because it is. I even started crying as I was writing Ch 30) I personally just like angst stories and I think that makes the fluff all the more better. Now that being said I want to know what are some Idea's you want to see fluff wise in this story? Not to say I'll put them in, but to just give me an idea of what you'll like to see with reader and Levi and who knows I might add something like that in here. 
> 
> Cause at the end of the day I want a write a story for me, but also for you guys too. So let a sista know Lol
> 
> And if you ever want to chat and talk about what you'd like to see just join the discord! 
> 
> https://discord.gg/S6FChAQ
> 
> xoxo


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **WARNING**  
> This chapter does have mentions of a sexual and drug abuses in it. If it's not for you or you're triggered by it please skip this chapter this has been your WARNING!!
> 
> playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2kBd98ZbURnhuH4T68ukRt
> 
> Just copy and paste!

Your pov

I opened my eyes and winced while trying to adjust to the light in the room.

God, I have the worst headache. What the fuck happened last night? I sat up with my eyes feeling heavy. The side of my face was on fire. What happened last night? I look around, and I felt my stomach sink. I don't know where I was at...This wasn't Samuel's place. Did I leave with anyone last night? Come one F/n think. Think!

Wait, I saw Levi last night. 

I started to breathe heavy. After five years of only seeing him on the TV, I actually saw Levi again in the flesh. 

I can't think about that now. I stood up, I don't know where I'm at, but my clothes all look the same from last night. Now, that I think about it, I didn't want to take any guys last night, and Sam got pissed off. But that didn't explain where I was now. 

I got up and took a vase that was sitting on the little nightstand. Where ever I was, it seemed nice, but still, I'm sure I shouldn't be here. I slowly opened the door. I didn't know what I should be expecting, So I was ready for anything. I didn't see anyone here so far, but I think I could hear some noise coming from the kitchen. I slowly walked the corner, and when I saw who was standing there, I involuntarily dropped the vase breaking it. 

It was Levi.

He snapped his head looking my way shocked by the sound of the breaking glass. 

I immediately dropped down to try and pick up the pieces, "I'm so sorry." 

"It's fine, it's fine," Levi said bending down. 

"Ouch!" I flinched back cutting my hand on some of the glass. 

"Are you okay?" He asked. 

I backed up form him, "Yes, Ugh." I snatched away from him when he tried to help me I shouldn't be here. "I should go." 

"F/n you're shaking," Levi told me. 

I stood up, "I'm fine. Thank you for taking care of me last night. I have to go now." I started to look for the door. 

"F/n please, hold on for a second."

"Sorry I really have somewhere I need to be."

"Fine, at least give me your number or something. Please," He begged. 

I stopped and looked at him. Levi was still so beautiful; I really wish things weren't like this. "You have no idea how great it was seeing you again, but I have to go." Then I walked out of the door. 

I moved quickly so Levi couldn't catch up with me. It was great seeing him, but that was it. I couldn't have him back in my life. It wouldn't be right. He would see the type of person I became, and I can't live with that. He can never know. Anyway, our lives were 100% different now. He's a fantastic actor. And I'm just a drug addicted whore...it just isn't the same.

Levi Pov

I ran after her, but by the time I got outside the studio she had already left. Why was she running from me? Was it that bad to see me again? Maybe I should just leave her alone...But I can't shake this feeling. It was her in that ally last night...She was the one I heard get the shit slapped out of them the last night. I can only wonder what has she gotten into?

Whatever it is, it can't be good.

I have to find her. But how? 

I got back into my studio. This is where I would stay whenever I visited down here. I never liked getting hotels, so I just rented this little spot, plus it was nice to have my own space. I went to get my phone, maybe Furlan knew someone who knew something. Anything would work. 

"Yeah, did you find her? What's up?" Furlan asked picking up his phone by the third ring.

"She just left. But we didn't even get a chance to talk."

"Aw, you ran her away?" He joked.

But I wasn't in a joking mood, something was happening to her, and just like when we were kids, every fiber of my being is telling me to protect her. "Have you heard anything about her in these last years?" 

"No," Furlan said. "I'm honestly as shocked as you are. It's the first time I've seen or heard about her in years...It was really like she had disappeared." 

"Shit." 

"What are you going to do?" He asked.

"I have to find her; I have to talk to her." 

"Why? I mean if she left...Maybe you do really have to leave it alone. It might be hard-" 

"No," I cut him off, "She's in trouble. She needs help. I don't know what's going on, but I know someone slapped the shit out of her last night and left her in an ally. She needs me right now, and I'll be damned if I don't do something about it." 

Furlan sighed, "Shit, sounds hella rough. Just be careful man." 

"Yeah, I will." After that, I hung up. Where do I even start? Maybe the club from last night? I mean what other choice do I have? I got up. That's what I'll do. Someone there has to know something about her, she was singing there after all. 

Furlan my be right, that she really just wants to leave the passed in the past. And that's fine, but I won't leave at least until I know she's okay. 

~Later

It didn't take me to find the club from last night. Seeing it in the daylight, you could really tell this area is a real shit hole. No wonder no one recognized me from TV or anything.m I doubt most of them could afford one. But somehow everything seemed alright last night. I guess a few drinks can really change your view on life.

I walked in and sat down at the bar. 

This place was gross. I can't believe Furlan took me here last night. Seeing everything in this night was pissing me off. I actually drank out one of the glasses. I made a mental note to get a new toothbrush to use and toss it out. 

"It's kinda early to be getting drunk cutie," The bartender said walking up to me. 

"I'm looking for someone. F/n? Do you know her?" 

a flash of emotion I couldn't pin down washed over her, anger? "What do you have an appointment or something?" She asked.

"No, I'm an old friend. I just want to see her." 

She chuckled, "Like I haven't heard that one. I don't know anything. Talk to Sam." 

Hearing that name I couldn't help but feel a rise in my blood. Was she still hanging out with him? I shook my head; this was no time to get made, something is still wrong, and this girl is clearly lying. "Look, just tell me what you know, I think she's in trouble, and I'm trying to help." 

The girl looked into my eyes. After a moment she sighed, "When is that girl not in trouble, She might come around tonight, but sometimes they go to one of the other clubs around here. You can try the one a little ways from here. Samuel and his guys are there most of the time." 

"Thank you," I told her getting up and leaving. 

"Hey," The girl called out to me. 

"Yeah?" 

"I hope you really are here to help her. She's a sweet girl," She told me.

"I know," I told her sighing, "Me too." 

Your Pov

I was fixing my clothes. 

"That was amazing doll." 

I gave the man I had never met a day in my life a smile, "It's what I do." I moved and kissed the man. The guy smirked at me grabbing my ass. I truly hated this. I hated that I did this. But if I didn't Samuel would get mad, and despite how much I hate him. He's all I have, and without him, I'm sure I'd be dead already. I didn't love him, but the fact was I needed him. So I had to do whatever he told me to do. Sleep with guys girls; I was his number one as he would say. And for that, he gave me what I needed. I guess it's a fair exchange. 

The guy put some money in my hand, and I smiled at him, "Thanks." 

"Tell Sam; I'll be back." He said. Disgusting. 

"Sure thing." Then I left the club bathroom and walked to where Samuel was sitting and put the money down on the table. 

I heard him laugh, "Good, girl. I got another guy upstairs." 

I sighed, "Samuel that's three already. I'm tired." 

"Next time do what I tell you at night, and you won't have this problem get upstairs," He barked. 

"Come on-" 

"Did I fucking stutter?" 

I felt the anger rising in me, but I couldn't say anything I already had a bruise I had to use a shit ton of makeup to cover from the slap from last night. And when push comes to shove, I know what Samuel's capable of; I've seen it first hand. And I wouldn't doubt for a second if he was made enough he'd kill me.

I started to head upstairs but not before hearing Franz say that another guy was outside wanted a go at me. 

"Ha, you a busy girl." Samuel laughed. He was so sicking. I hated him. I hated everything about him. I wouldn't have this issue if I had never met him. If my mom had never died. Things would be so much different. But they weren't this was my life. 

Levi Pov

This place was more disgusting than the last one. 

I followed the guy into a back room. F/n actually had something to do with a place like this? So much was different now, in just five years so much changed. She changed. How do I even talk to her? What was she doing? In the back of my mind, I had an idea, but I really don't want to believe it, but after hearing, that bartender asked if I had an appointment and this guy taking me back her now I'm starting to get an idea. I really hope I'm wrong. 

This isn't F/n. Someone has to be forcing her. 

We got to the back room, and there were a few people sitting around a table playing cards. 

"Here's the guy," The guy who walked be back here said. 

"Oh, Shit! Hollywood?" The guy in the middle yelled. I immediately recognized him. 

It was Samuel. He looked more sleazy than the last time I saw him. I didn't even know that was possible, but now he had tattoos all over him. F/n really choose him over me? 

"Is F/n here?" I asked him getting to the point.

"For the right price she might be," He said smirking. 

He was sick. I don't think I've ever been this mad in my life. "Let me see her." 

He started to laugh, "If you want to see her you gotta pay like everyone else. Time is money; you should know that Hollywood." 

I was beyond furious. "How much?" I asked pulling out some cash. I was getting to the bottom of this. Nothing was going to stop me. 

Samuel laughed harder, "Now that's what I'm talking about. You can be next. Trust me; she's the best." Then we winked at me. 

I never wanted to kill anyone in my life, but if I could end his life, I would right here and right now. Hearing him talk about F/n like she wasn't even a season was pissing me off. I need answers and now. 

Just then a man walked from downstairs fixing his belt. "I thought you said she was your best? I ain't paying for that shit she just laid there like a dead fish." He complained. 

"Fucking bitch," I heard Samuel mumble getting up, "Hold on Hollywood." He got up and went upstairs.

I wanted to follow him. I wanted to just take her and leave this place, but I know if I do that. I might just make things worst. There was no way she was doing this willing. I just had to get her out of this.

I heard some yelling then like it sounded like something was being knocked over. Fuck this. I started to head up there, But a guy got in fount of me.

"He'll be down in a second." 

"Get out of my way," I told him.

The guy pulled out a guy, "I said he'd be back in a second." 

I sighed feeling more frustrated and stepped back. What the fuck has F/n gotten herself into?

A moment passed, and Samuel walked back downstairs fixing his belt, "Had to show her who was in charge you know what I mean, right Hollywood. She's ready for you by the way." 

I rushed passed him. I didn't have time to deal with that asshole. F/n needed me.

I ran into the room to see her kneeling on the floor hunched over the bed. Her face smothered into the bed; she was sobbing. My hearts sunk, "F/n!" I called her name out rushing towards her. 

"What happened? What did that bastard do to you?" I was pulling her close to me trying to see her face. 

But she started to push from me, "Leave me alone Samuel." She was fighting against me.

I shook her slightly, "F/n! F/n it's me. Levi. It's Levi!" 

F/n looked confused, "Levi?" She looked me in the eyes, "You shouldn't be here, get out." 

"No," I told her. 

She fought from me, "No, get out of here. This isn't a place for you-" 

"And it is for you? What the hell is going on? What did that do he to you?" 

"You- you wouldn't get it. Get out of here Levi." She told me, a serious in her tone that I don't think I ever heard from her.

"Not without you," I told her. There was no way I was leaving her in this place with them

."I'm not leaving with you Levi." 

"Why not?" 

"Would you just go," She snapped.

"I paid for your time, and I'm going to get it," I told her.

She froze, "You-you...you paid for me?" 

"Yes, now talk to me. Let me get you out of here." 

F/n hung her head, "Then you know why I'm not going anywhere. Just leave Levi." 

"F/n-" 

"Just leave Levi!" She screamed, her voice cracked. 

"I want to help you." 

"I don't want your help!" 

I was taken back. Why wasn't she let me help her? This was not her. She shouldn't be here. She should be doing anything, anything but this. But she won't let me. "Fine, I'll leave," I told her. I don't think I was going to get anything from her. "But I'll be back; I won't leave you. If I gotta go to every cub you're at I'll be there, I'm not giving up until I get an answer." 

"Levi just leave me alone." She said kneeling on the ground, "You don't know what he'll do. Just forget about me." She cried. 

I tried to touch her shoulder but she pulled away. 

I sighed, "Like I said, I'm not leaving till you're okay." I got up. It was killing me to leave he like this but she wasn't litsening to reason and I don't think I'm getting anywhere right now. But I'n not giving up.

I won't let her leave me again. 

"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> Things are getting heavier and heavier, how will Levi get the reader out of this situation, will she even let him? What will happen next? Who knows (I do lol) ~Ps my birthday is Tuesday~
> 
> If you liked this chapter or just the whole story please leave a kudo. If you really like it leave me a comment letting me know what you like about it, or what you don't like I wanna know! Good feedback bad feedback(but not rude) Let me know!! I'm going to start my next shift now, so I hope you all have a good day! <3
> 
> xoxo


	33. Chapter 33

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter does have mentions of a sexual, drug abuses and mentions of suicide in it. If it's not for you or you're triggered by these things please skip this chapter this has been your WARNING!!
> 
> Discord link: https://discord.gg/S6FChAQ
> 
> Just copy and paste!

I laid on the floor coming down from the short high. In those few moments, I'm able to forget about all my issues. I hated that I had to do it, but God was it everything. Feeling like there was nothing wrong in the world. Just being on cloud nine. I didn't have to worry about Sam, any of his friends there were no clients. No men I didn't know telling me disgusting thing. Not even Levi. It was just me. 

But it only lasts a few seconds, sometimes I really wish It could be this way all the time. If I died, it would be for sure...But I think I'm just scared. That's the only reason I haven't tried. I mean what if I mess up and have to live with another problem? Anyway, it wasn't anything I liked to think about a lot. But still, I bet it would be nice to be with my mom again.

I turned on my side and thinking about yesterday.

Levi came to the club and paid for me...

He knew now. 

I started to cry, that was the one thing I didn't want. I didn't want him to know what I had to do, he'll go back and tell his mom, what will she think? They'll both hate me. I don't see why they can't. 

"We're going out get ready." I heard Samuel yell from downstairs. 

I sighed not moving. I guess I shouldn't complain, since Levi came by yesterday he's actually been in a good mood. It was because of how much Levi gave him...Pathetic. I didn't think anything could feel worst then the first time Samuel- but this-this is worst. Knowing that he knows makes me want to die more than I ever wanted to before. 

I snapped up once the door of the room was slammed open, "I said get ready." 

"Can't we just stay in tonight?" I asked in a mumble. 

"What the fuck is your issue? You've been talking back a lot. Do I need we have another talk? Or has seen Hollywood got you feeling like a badass now? Don't let him get you killed." Then Sam walked out leaving me alone to get ready. 

I hung my head, would getting killed be so bad?

Levi Pov

"You said you'd be home already." Cira snapped at me over the phone. 

"I know, Some-" 

"You know you have to start filming soon? Greg is going to have a fit if you're not back by next week," She said cutting me off. 

"I'll be back in time, I just have to get some stuff down here." 

Cira sounded annoyed. "Fine, I guess we I'll have to tell Greg to cancel the talk show for next week." 

"Guess so," I told her, It's not like I really wanted to do it anyway. It was her idea to get us on the show. She likes all the attention I'm not a fan of it. Just then Furlan walked into my studio I had told him to come over. "I gotta go I'll talk to you later. Love you. " 

"Bye." Then Cira hung up. I didn't think of it. She was just angry. 

That was the thing about Cira, I learned to love her over the course of is working together. She's just upfront about everything. She says what she's thinking. It's pretty much the same thing I do all the time. the only difference is she tends to run on anger more than anything. Personality wise she was the total opposite from F/n. 

I can't help but think about it sometimes. especially now after seeing F/n. Would things be different? If she had stayed with me? If she went to L.a. What would our lives be now if I had convened her...But she said she was in love with him then...What changed? Cause she couldn't love him now. She was scared. I could tell she was hurting. But why won't she let me help her?

"Did you ever find F/n?" Furlan asked.

"I did," I answered him.

"Okay? And what? You didn't do anything stupid did you?" 

I sighed, "No, but she is in a lot of trouble. She's being a prostitute." 

"Seriously?" Furlan said walking to sit down across from me, "What happened? How do you know?" 

I sat there and told him everything that happened. No matter how many people I've met in my life he was always someone I could turn to when things get shity. Even after F/n left the first time. I talked to him when I did want to talk to someone. he was there, and now he's here now. No one in L.A. could ever compare, he's a true friend. Right next to F/n he's the only one I've ever trusted. 

"This is fucked," Furlan said leaning back in his chair, "We gotta get her out there." 

"I plan too, she just has to let me," I told him.

"Fuck that, take her out of there. She's not going to come willingly you don't know what that asshole has put in her head, we just have to go in there and take her no talking." Furlan said standing up, "We've may have grown up, and apart but I don't care. F/n is still my friend. I'm surprised you could walk away from her." 

I stood up, "it's not like I wanted too, they had guns and shit there. I would have ended up making it worst, that why I called you!" 

"Fine, FIne." He said walking back and forth, "Well, what are we going to do?" 

"I'm going back up there, and I'll talk to her, and I'll get her out of there." 

"Then let's go," Furlan said, he was almost more anxious to get her then I was. But that wasn't the case. I wanted- no I needed to get her out of this situation. It was just, seeing her like that yesterday. It did something to me...Seeing her so helpless. All because she stayed with him, The moment he started this why didn't she stop it, and find help? Why would she choose this life? I shook my head, maybe I didn't have all the facts, but more than answers right now I just want to know she's safe. 

~Later~

I guess the good thing about this club over was it wasn't a popular place. Because it would suck if someone saw me coming in and out of this place, I bed Greg my manager would have a heart attack. Furlan and I came up with a plan. I'd go and see if she was in there and then I'd send him a text where he'll be waiting out in the back, and we'd rush out taking F/n with us and not looking back. If she knew Furlan was going to help, hopefully she'd be more willing. 

"Ready?" Furlan asked as we pulled up. 

I nodded getting out the car. Hopefully, she was in here, I didn't want to ride around to all the clubs out here looking for her. 

I walked in and Immediately started searching for her the sooner the better. 

"Can't we be seventeen? That's all I want to do, If you could let me in, I could be good with you," I looked at the stage and saw F/n singing. Something about it this time was different than the other night. Maybe I couldn't tell then because I was in so much shock at seeing her, but there was this sadness in her voice now. It was heartbreaking. And If that wasn't enough hearing the song she was singing brought back so many memories. It was from my musical; before everything went to shit. Before we did that musical things were so different. We kept our feelings to ourselves. But then after that...that night she told me she loved me. Then the night after that we were together for the first time. 

That was so long ago.

I walked over to the bar, I couldn't go up to her now since she was singing, that would just make a sense, and I had to be cool about this. The less attention I could bring to this situation the better.

"So you're back." I looked over and saw the same girl from yesterday. 

"So I am," 

"And I see F/n is here." 

"And she is." 

The girl shook her head and started to walk away but I called after her, "Is Samuel here?" 

She nodded, "He's in the back most likely drunk out of his mind." 

"Between me and you what are the chances of me getting her out of here without him noticing?" I asked her. Maybe she could help. 

"50/50 he's got his guys all around here, but if you're not acting suspicious, he shouldn't have anything to say. So I say just play it cool." After that, she walked away to another guy that was sitting at the bar. I looked back at F/n she was still singing. I wasn't listening to the guy she was singing with only her. Like I said before she still had this incredible voice that I think could bring peace to anyone, but there was definitely something sad in her voice. I just want to know what the hell has she been going through and I want to just save her.

I watched as she finished singing and put her mic down and got off the stage and walked to the bar. The bartender walked down to her and pointed her to me, F/n tensed up. We made eye contact for a moment. She looked like she was having a war with herself. Then she finally decided to walk over. It was now or never; I'm getting her out of this tonight.

Your Pov

Why was he here? 

I walked over to him quickly. I didn't want Samuel to see him here. On the way here he warned me that he didn't want me seeing him anymore. And I know if he sees Levi here he's liable to do anything.

"Levi, you have to leave," I told him as I walked up to him. 

"N-" 

"No, there are no buts. Samuel will kill you if he sees you." I told him. I had to just be straight with him. I wasn't going to see him get killed because of me. I just need him out of my life. He doesn't need me. 

"I don't care. I will not leave you here with him," He snapped back.

"Are you not listening to me-" 

"No, you're not listening to me," Levi told me, there was so much force in his voice, "I am not going to leave you here. Even if I have to drag you out of here." 

I sighed, he's not going to listen to reason. But I can't do this. "Lev-" 

"Shut up." Levi cut me off, in a harsh whisper, "Furlan is outside waiting for us...I heard Samuel is in the back just act natural. Pretend we're going out and we get in the car and leave." 

What? He had a plan? Furlan was involved, "Levi's he'll find me, I won't-" 

Levi took my hands, "I can't leave you here, not when I know what's going on. I won't ask again let's go." 

I wanted to pull away, this wasn't going to work. Samuel will find us he'll kill us. He'll kill Levi, and it will be my fault. No. I won't let it that happened. I planted my feet there as he tried to leave. "No, Levi." 

Levi looked like he was getting annoyed, "Damnit F/n, we can't do this right now. Let me help you." 

I shook my head, I wasn't trying to cause a scene because it would bring Samuel out, but still, I was scared as hell. I just want Levi to be safe. "Please." But Levi wouldn't listen to reason; he pulled me out. No one seemed to notice us leaving. Levi was rubbing his thumb over my hand, "It will be okay." 

By now we had made it outside, and I could see Furlan in the car it was already started up, I couldn't believe we had actually made it out. This was insane. Was Levi really going to be able to save me? Somehow I was starting to actually start to believe that maybe Levi could pull this off. Out of everyone in the world why couldn't Levi? Was he really going to be able to save me? We were getting closer to the car. Was this life about to really be over for me? Was there actually hope? Had Levi set everything up?

"Where the hell are you going?" 

I froze.

It was Samuel's voice. Levi and I turned to him, "She's leaving with me." Levi told him. 

I snapped my head at Levi, he didn't know how he was talking too. He didn't know what Sam would do. "No," I looked between Levi and Samuel, "I wasn't doing-going-" 

But Levi pulled me behind him, "I'm taking her with me." 

"See that's not how it works," Samuel started to say but then Levi threw a stack of cash at him. 

"Get in the car F/n." 

"Levi-" 

"Come on get in the car F/n," This time Furlan said it. Where are they trying to get themselves killed? I couldn't go, not now, not since Sam was here stopping me. 

"Like I said this isn't how it works. I don't like the way you've been rubbing off her, so you and your friend get out of here." Samuel told them, "F/n get your ass over here." 

I was about to move but Levi grabbed my arm, "You are not going with him." 

"It wasn't a choice I was giving you, get your ass over here," Samuel yelled at me again, but Levi wasn't letting me go. 

"Levi you don't understand," I tried to tell him, but Levi wasn't listening.

"Just get inside the car, Please." He stated. 

Samuel started to raise his voice, "If you don't get your ass over here F/n-" 

But Levi insisted, "I won't let her-" 

"He'll kill-" 

"Oh my Gosh, are you Levi Ackerman?" Some random girls asked walking up to us. 

It was random, but the two girls didn't seem to care what he was doing they just want to talk to Levi. Levi and Furlan seemed to take this moment as a chance because before I knew it, Furlan had got out the car and pulled me inside. Quickly after that Levi got in the car, and before I knew it. We had already taken off. 

"What the hell?" I said feeling a wash of panic. What did they do? "He'll come after you!" I screamed at them. 

"It's fine, F/n," Levi said. 

"No, no it isn't Levi, this isn't right. Take me back! He'll kill you!" I screamed, I know they want to help, but I can't let them do this. This wouldn't end well.

But Levi grabbed me, "No one is going to die. You're safe now." 

I was crying, he didn't get it. Why did Levi have to think he was right about everything? He's not. He's so fucking arrogant. "No, No." I kept crying I was so scared. I just wanted him to be safe. Didn't he know that? The whole reason I even got into this life, was to keep him safe, and not he's throwing everything away! I fought against him crying I couldn't do this. I couldn't be the reason he died. I wouldn't be!

But Levi just held me he didn't understand. 

"It's fine, It will be okay," Levi just kept saying that over and over again. But it wasn't it wasn't going to be okay. I just know Samuel will find us. He'll find us, and he'll be so mad. And I won't be able to handle the guilt of knowing it's my fault anything bad happens to Levi. I would never be able to live with myself. 

We drove around for a while and then finally we stopped somewhere. 

At this point my voice had started to hurt from screaming, I just sat there now. 

"Come inside with me F/n," Levi said. 

"No," I told him.

"F/n it's going-" 

"The both of you are idiots," I cut Furlan off, "Just take me back." 

I heard Furlan sighed, "Imma go inside...I'll give you too a sec." Then Furlan got out the car leaving Levi and me alone. 

"Please, Levi." I looked at him in his eyes. "Just take me back. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine." 

"Like hell, you'll be." He said. Levi was looking frustrated. "You were just screaming he'll kill me. Why in the world would I leave you with him." 

"Why are you-" 

"Listen to me." Levi cut me of grabbing both my arms and shaking me. "You're safe now. He's not coming to get you. No one is. You're with me now. I'm going to keep you safe. I'm going to protect you just come inside with me." 

I looked into his eyes, he looked like he believed that he could keep me safe. Why was he so stupid. But part of me wanted to believe him though. That he was going to be the one to save me. But I was so scared.

"It's me F/n. When have I ever lied to you?" Levi added.

I wanted to believe him, but...I just don't know.

Levi Pov

It took a while, but I convened F/n to come in. 

"Is she alright?" Furlan asked. 

I nodded. She came in and said she was tired, so I gave her my room so she could rest. "She's fine."

"I've never seen her like that," Furlan said leaning on the counter in the kitchen. I was making some tea for her. 

"I've never seen her scared like that. She really thinks he'll find us and kill us," I told him.

"Who knows what that bastard did to her, all this time...Who knows what she's been going through." 

"Don't remind me," I told him. I didn't want to think about the shit she had to be going through, what he was doing to her, what he made her do. It was a hard pill to swallow. I still didn't want to believe it. 

"What are you going to do?" 

"I'll talk to her more in the morning." 

"You want me to stay?" 

I shook my head, "Nah, thank you, but I think it should just be her and me for a while...We have a lot to talk about. I'm sure she doesn't want an audience." 

Furlan nodded. "You're probably right." He moved from the kitchen with me. I had the tea done and was going to see her. "Call if you need something," Furlan said, before walking out the door. I went behind him and locked the door. 

I was thankful for Furlan, if he weren't here tonight, it would have gone a lot differently. Not to mention those random fans helped out a bit. I guess I'm a little bummed that I can't thank them. They have no idea how much they really helped at that moment. And with Furlan's quick thinking too. F/n was finally safe. 

I walked to the room I let her have, and slowly opened the door. She was standing at the window. "Are you still trying to leave?" I asked her. Why was she, so hell-bent on going back to that prick? If she was so sure he'd kill me why go back?

"Levi, I won't be the reason he tries to kill you." She said shaking her head.

I sat the tea down, "Nothing is going to happen to me."

"You don't know what he'll do Levi." 

"Listen F/n," I said walking closer to her. "Everything is going to be fine. He won't find us." 

"How do you know that? He had guys everywhere. You don't know the things I've seen him do if he's angry enough he'll find me-us. And I have no doubt that he would kill me, or just to spite me kill you, and I won't let that happen." 

"I'll get somebody guards while I'm out here, how about that?" I asked her taking her hand. She was scared. There were so many things I wanted to say- to ask. But what was important right now it giving her a peace of mind. 

"Levi, that won't work. I'm not trying to see a bloodbath just let me go you're fine without-" 

"Would you shut up talking like that," I couldn't help but snap at her. 

I didn't mean too but hearing her talk like that wasn't anything I wanted to hear. I wasn't going to leave her just because I'd be fine without her. No matter what my need to protect her wasn't gone. And it wasn't because of my old feelings for her. It was because she was my friend before anything else, and not to mention the last conversation I had with her mother was that I would protect her. 

F/n was still shaking. It hurt so much to see her like this, "Please-" 

"Come back to L.a. with me then," I told her. It wasn't a question. If she was so scared of Samuel, then I'd just take him out of the picture, and by that I mean take her with me. "That way he can't hurt either one of us." 

"Levi I can't-" 

"Why not?" I asked. I was trying to be understandable, but it was beyond frustrating. The more and more I try to help her the more she's pulling away. I can't but help wonder if she really just wants this life. I hate the thought of it. But I don't have any answers, and in the back of my mind I can't help but start to remember how she was the one who broke my heart. She's the one who left. Who left to go with this asshole and then stayed with him when he started making her- I took a deep breath. I can't think of that right now. It isn't important. What's important right now is getting her to a safe place, and that's anywhere I'm at. 

"We can go back to L.A., and you won't ever have to deal with him ever again. You can get a real job out there and everything. I'll help you get on your feet." 

"Levi-" 

"I'm not taking no for an answer." 

F/n still tried to argue."Why won't you listen to me-" 

"Because I promised your mom I'd protect you!" I yelled. That made her be quiet, "And we can see just how good of a job I've been doing. Now get some sleep." I told her before walking out of the room. I didn't want to talk to her like that, but she's so fucking difficult. But I don't want to argue with her all night. In the morning we can finish all that. I went and put my code in to lock the house, at least this way I know if she tries to leave. I shook my head; she shouldn't even be trying to go back. She's not the one who's supposed to protect me; it's the other way around. 

I walked back into my own room. This night was too much, and I honestly don't feel like sleeping at all. Too many things on my mind. But at least I know where she is. I laid down on my bed. How many nights did I wonder how she was doing? And now to know she's in the next room...It itself was relieving, but there was still this nagging in the back of my head reminding me of how we left things. Should I have tried harder...is this whole thing my fault? Or is it hers? For cheating and staying with him? I never wanted these things to ever happen to her, but was it her own fault?

Fuck Levi, what am I thinking? This is F/n...I'm talking about. She had her moments...but still she always had a reason for them...and when she left it was after her mom died...but everything had been going so well...other then Samuel getting into the pitcture...but what if he did-No. I remembed that day like it was this morning. She had those hickies on her neck...she was with him...and said she loved him. Maybe that's apart of her wanting to go back to him...She still loved him.

That made me sick on the stomach. I need to think of something else.

I can get answers later...Right now I should just be grateful she's back in my life, and she's safe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> I've been trying to get this chapter out for 5ever but it seemed like everything else in life was just "meh you don't need it out," But here it is! I hope you all enjoyed it! 
> 
> The reader is with Levi again!! But there still so much they need they need to resolve. 
> 
> Who knows what will happen next? Let's hear some theories! Tell me what you think of the story where it needs to improve! what's been your favorite chapter so far? I wanna know! 
> 
> also, thank you all of the birthday wishes they made my day! Until the next chapter (Which I hope will be done soon)
> 
> xoxo


	34. Chapter 34

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter!!

Your Pov

I didn't get much sleep last night. 

Any minute now, I just know it. Samuel will get here. I want to leave, but Levi won't even let me fo that now. He thinks he's so right about this, but he has no idea. Samuel when he's mad enough he'll do something stupid. He's always been this way. I've learned if you just don't mess with him about his money or his drugs most everything would go alright. But right now I was here, so that meant he was missing money. 

I got up and walked outside the room Levi gave me. I didn't hear him up yet. Maybe he's still sleeping. Could this be a chance for me to leave out? If I just go back to Samuel and tell him how sorry I am for all this, it will calm him down? I know he'll beat the shit out of me because of this, but it would be better then him killing Levi. I mean Levi still has so much to live for. 

I walked around the apartment. I didn't really get a good look at it the other day, but walking around now I can see this is Levi's place. Everything was so neat and clean. Just like he's always been, I smiled to myself. I guess he hasn't changed much, still thinks he's right about everything, and a neat freak sounds like Levi Ackerman to me. 

"You're up," I jumped at the voice but turned around to see Levi standing there. He was in a T-shirt and sweats, and his hair was a mess. I smiled to myself. It's been so long since I saw him...

"You hungry?" He asked walking passed me and going to the kitchen.

I quietly followed him "No, not really." 

"That's fine I'll make some tea," He said moving around his kitchen.

I moved to the counter and sat down. Neither of us said anything. I just watched him move around. It was weird. It was like something out of a dream, I never thought I'd ever actually be in the same room with him like this ever again...but here he was. This was real/

"You alright?" Levi asked putting a glass in fount of me. 

"As much as I can be. I really wish you'd let me leave," I told him honestly. 

"I wish you'd stop saying that." He told me.

"I just don't want anything to happen to you okay, I'm just trying to protect you," I told him. I couldn't look him in the eye.

"That's not your job. I'm the one who's supposed to protect you," He told me. Levi moved his hand to touch me, but I pulled away. I didn't deserve him helping me like this. He didn't need to protect me. He was throwing away everything I had did for him away. He was inviting Samuel here to kill him. The one thing I never wanted to happen. I don't care what Samuel does to me, I've been through the worst with him already, and I can take it. But the moment Levi gets in the picture it's all different I know I won't be able to handle it if he did something to Levi. I won't be able to live with myself. 

"Can I just take a shower?" I asked him. I was still feeling disgusting from last night; if Levi wasn't going to let me go at least he could give me this, I want to get out of these clothes. And I bet he already thought that. He must think it's gross I was in one of his fancy bed with my hooker clothes on anyway.

"Sure," Levi said sounding defeated.

He walked me to the bathroom and gave me a towel. "Here, Um I'll find you something to put on when you're done." 

"It's fine." I told him, "I can just put these-" 

"I get something for you." 

"I'm fine." 

Levi sighed, "Just let me take care of you," Levi pushed some hair out of my face, "I have no idea what has been going on with you, but I know you need someone to take care of you right now, so let me. You're not alone anymore." 

I looked away, who did he think he was coming into my life like this and trying to make everything better...I just nodded at him, and went inside the bathroom. I closed the door and started to cry. He's Levi. He's the only one who could ever make anything better, but this was all wrong, and I was so scared. I just want Levi to be safe.

 

Levi Pov

F/n was in the shower now. I can tell she's still scared, but she's trying to calm down. 

No matter how much she askes I won't let her leave, she's safest with me. I'm the only one who can keep her safe now. She'll move to L.A. with me, and I'll get her on her feet. She's only 23 she still has so much life to live, and if she stays here without me, it's over for her, who knows what that bastard would do if he saw her again. So She has to come with me. I'll convince her. 

Just then my phone started ringing. Shit, It was Cira. I think I might have told her I'd call her back yesterday. "Yes?" 

"Do you want to explain to me why I see your face on this TMZ article holding on to some bimbo?" She asked.

"What?" 

"Do not what me Levi Ackerman. What the fuck are you out there doing? It's all over the news everyone is saying you have a hooker problem! That you're down there going to shady clubs and cheating, You had better start explaining what you're doing down there, Better yet get your Ass back in L.a. right now." 

"Tch, That's not even true," I told her. She was getting all worked up, but I stayed calm I know I didn't do anything wrong. It's annoying knowing there were people watching me last night. I didn't want to deal with these problems, but I guess.

"I don't know who to believe, so you had better get your ass back here." 

"You're not even in L.a. what good would me coming back do right now?" I asked her. She was doing some work out in London right now anyway. 

"Levi-" 

"You already know you the press works, I wasn't out with a hooker," I told her cutting her off. "I was out with an old friend. Who by the way will be coming back with me." 

"What? Now, what are you going on about?" She demanded.

"They've been going through some hard times, and I'm bringing them back with me tomorrow to help them get on their feet. It's nothing big." I told her. 

"Levi-" But then she cut herself off, I think someone was in the back talking to her. "Levi this convo isn't over! But I have to go; you better answer your phone when I call you again!" Then she hung up before I could say anything else. 

I sighed, I didn't say F/n was a girl on purpose, who knows how crazy she's gone if I told her she was a girl. Cira has a right to be angry, but it's not that big of a deal. F/n is just my friend at this point. It's not like we still have feelings for each other as we did. The only thing now is I have to keep her safe. Maybe if Cira gets too mad about it F/n could stay with my mom, I know she'll be happy when she sees her again.

"Was...Was that your girlfriend?" 

I looked behind me to see F/n. 

"She's was pretty loud," F/n said.

I just looked at her. I didn't mean to stare but, how was she still as beautiful as the last day I saw her? And seeing her wearing my clothes always made her cuter. I could feel my heart beating faster. I shook my head; It's not the same though. We're different people now, and even if Cira is a pain in my ass I love her...and F/n well, she made it clear how much she didn't care about me a while ago.

"I don't want to cause problems for you Levi; It would be best if you just let me leave. Thank you for try-" 

"I asked you to shut up talking like that already F/n," I cut her off. 

But she shook her head, "It's not like we're kids anymore Levi I can take-" 

Before she could finish talking we both heard a loud knock on the door. F/n froze. I could see her breathing get heavy and harder. Sheer terror was in her eyes, "Le-run- you-You have to go," She was studdering.

I walked to her, but she backed away, "He's here, He'll kill you. he'll Kill you." F/n was in full panic.

"No one is here to kill me." I tried to explain to her, but she flooded into herself falling on the floor. "Just run." 

The knock came again. I sighed, how do I even deal with her like this? I walked out of the room, but then F/n tried to stop me, "Levi, please don't go!" She said in her loudest whisper. I held her hand, "It's not him, I know it isn't." 

But she wasn't listening, "Don't go to the door Levi, please, Just run." 

There was another knock, "This is security!" They yelled. It was a deeper voice. 

"See?" I told her, "It's just the security guards I said I would get last night, stop worrying." 

A little relief seemed to wash over her face, "Are-are you sure?" 

I nodded. 

F/n's grip on me started to loosen, I held her hand and walked to the door. Opening it to see a man in a black shirt with the words security on it. "See, it's fine," I told her. I looked at the man, he seemed a bit concerned, but I nodded him off. 

"My name is Gabb. I was here saying we're stationed right outside, did you want anyone in here with you all?" He asked.

"No, Just stay outside. Make sure no one gets in without my okay." I told him. The large man nodded, and I closed the door after him. 

I turned to F/n you seemed lost in a daze. 

"It's going to be fine." 

She didn't say anything.

I walked us into my living room. Maybe she just needed to sit down for a bit. I hated seeing her like this, she was so scared and acted so helpless. This wasn't the F/n I knew. This was a shell with the face of F/n. But I'm determined to get her back. 

We sat down on my couch, "I leave for L.A. tomorrow, so you won't have much to worry about." 

"Why are you doing this Levi?" F/n finally said after not speaking for like five minutes. 

"Doing what?" 

F/n threw her hands up in the air, "This! Helping me, You don't owe me anything, and don't say it's because of my mom. She has nothing to do with me whatever you promised her is over she's dead." 

"Because it's you. Why wouldn't I? What type of question is that? I'll always protect you." I told her.

"Then why did you when I needed you to most!" She screamed. I didn't even know what she was talking about. But I can tell she's hurting so much, but so was I. Seeing her like this. This didn't have to be her life. If she had stayed with me. We wouldn't be going through this.

"I don't know what you're talking about whenever you needed me I was the one there. You left F/n. I would have done anything for you," I told her feeling myself getting more upset. I hated seeing her like this, and I hated talking to her like this but It wasn't just on me, she had a part in this too. 

I looked at her, and I could see she was shaking. 

"I have to go," She said walking away from me. 

"You're not going anywhere F/n!" I called out grabbing her, but she was cold, but she was wet from sweat too. What the hell? Was she sick? She fought against me, "Let me go, Levi, I have to get to Samuel!" She screamed. Why did she want to go back to him?

"I'm not letting you go back to him, so he'll kill you," I told her.

"I just need to get my things from him. I have to go," She pulled away, but by now I pulled her in my hairs. She was burning up now, What the hell was going on.

"If I don't leave I'll die, Levi! Let me go!" She was acting so different then she was a minute ago, it was like she was doing a full 180. What the hell just happened? "I need it, just let me go!" She was crying now; She needed it? She needed what?

But that's when something clicked. 

Oh, no. 

Was she on drugs too? Why-Why would she do this? She was having a withdraw I've seen other people go through this, but never anyone I actually knew personally. She was fighting and scratching to get away from me. This was heartbreaking and horriafing at the same time. F/n out of all people. but I couldn't let her. I can't let her leave. This was so much worst then I thought it was. What the hell has she been through? 

"Just leave me, Levi," She cried, "Leave me like you already did. I don't want you here. I don't want your help. Let me go! Or just kill me!" She just kept crying and screaming. She was saying so many things each stabbing me in the heart. What happened to her. I wanted nothing more then answers right now, but I wasn't getting any of that right now. Right now all I can do is just wait this out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> This chapter was kinda rushed out, but I just wanted to get it done so bad because uggggh it was just in my head and the next one is going to be so good!! 
> 
> Anyways thanks for reading! I have to rush to work now! please leave a kudo and comment! 
> 
> xoxo


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three chapters out all within hours from each other??? 
> 
> This chapter does have mentions of a sexual, drug abuses in it, If it's not for you or you're triggered by these things, please skip this chapter this has been your WARNING!!

Your Pov

I woke up feeling gross. 

I felt gross, disgusting, tired. I felt like I hadn't even woke up. I was still in a daze, but I could still see everything around me. My could feel my hair; it felt stick on my face, I felt dirty and sweaty. Like I had been running all day yesterday. Then slowly everything from yesterday started to come back to me. How pathetic was I! I went off on Levi, and for no reason! I remembered feeling like I just needed a hit. I was saying things to him that I didn't even want to tell him. He must hate me now. He knows what I've been doing now; I'm sure he doesn't want anything to do with me. It's not like I'm the same person I used to be. I guess he realizes that now. I won't be surprised if he decided leaving me here is what's best. 

"Are you okay?" I heard Levi's voice ask me. 

I sat up and saw Levi standing in the doorway. I didn't even remember him bring me to a bed yesterday, but from looking out the window, it looked like it was midday, "How long was I out?" 

"Almost a day," He answered. 

I nodded, "Levi I'm sorry, I should leave. I don't want to cause you any-" 

"You don't have to be sorry," Levi said, "I should have fought harder for you. This is on me." 

"It's not Levi-" 

"You can't tell me that, You already said what you thought yesterday." He said. Then Levi sighed, "I got you some clothes, there inside the bathroom shower and I'll have something for you to eat. I know you have to be hungry." Then he walked away. He was upset. I was upsetting him. I didn't want to fo that. I didn't want Levi to be angry at me. I shouldn't even be here. If he'd just let me leave he'd be alright. And I don't have to go back to Samuel. I can fo find something else to do. My point is I can manage. He doesn't need me coming into his life fucking things up.

I sighed and got up and went to the bathroom. I don't think I can live with this guilty feeling. It was great, fantastic even seeing Levi. But my life isn't with him anymore. It hasn't been for five years. A lot has changed. He was successful; he had a girlfriend, he was voted the sexiest man alive last year for fuck sake. This wasn't high school anymore, things aren't the same, so I shouldn't even be in his life. It wouldn't be right for me to let him try to make room for me. I just have to tell him. 

I mean, I'm a grown woman, I can handle myself. I don't need him, and he doesn't need me. 

I got out of the shower and put on the clothes Levi got for me. How'd he even figure out my size? I mean it was just some sweats but still...

I think I hate this. He shouldn't be spending his hard worked money on me. I sighed and walked out of the bathroom and into the kitchen seeing Levi leaning on the counter drinking some tea. 

"Levi I'm leaving," I told him then I left out heading to the door. If I stayed and tried to convince him I would never leave. I'm doing this for him. Levi thinks he knows what's best for me, but he doesn't. I'll be fine. I have to be the one who thinks about this rationally.

Levi was already calling my name, and before I could even get to the door had grabbed my arm and pulled me back to him. Something about the way he grabbed me so fast made me put my other hand up in defense. Levi quickly let my arm go. "I'm so sorry F/n," He said. His voice low, "I would never hurt you. You have to know that." 

I sighed putting my hand down, "I know..." 

"F/n, please tell me...What happened?" 

"Huh?" 

"What happened to you? What did that bastard do to you?" He asked. His voice was so soft; it almost sounds like it was breaking. 

knowing I was the reason he was feeling this way didn't make me feel any better, "I don't want to tell you, Levi." 

"Why not? I can't help if I don't know where even to start F/n," He said.

"I don't want your help, Levi," I told him.

I could see his chest start to rise and fall faster, "But you'd rather go back to him? The guy who made you like this? F/n this isn't normal. You know that." 

I didn't want to go back to Samuel, I mean he was the only one I've had for a while, but I don't think I'd go back to him if I have a choice, and for now, I do. I can go find something else to do until he finds me, whatever I do I just don't want Levi to be involved. He doesn't need me and my shit in his life. "I won't go to him; I'll figure something out." 

"And the moment you need a fix you'll be back at his door. And he'll kill you." Levi snapped. I could feel the pain in my heart from that. Yet it was true; that would most likely happen.

But I sighed feeling frustrated, so what if that happened. The point is I won't be in Levi's life. "So what," I said nonchalantly.

"So what?" Levi said in disbelief. He took a step back pulling his hands through his hair, "What the fuck is wrong with you? I'm trying to help you!" He yelled. 

I flinched. But I was getting just as angry; he wasn't listening. "And I told you I don't want your help!" 

"You love him that much? You'd go back to him? He was pimping you F/n! He made you a whore! You didn't see yourself last night! He wasn't the one there helping you last night; it was me! And that was the fucking hardest thing I had to do in my life, and you'd go back to him. What the fuck is wrong with you!" He yelled. 

I felt hot tears starting to come out. Didn't he know I knew this already? I knew what my life became I didn't need him telling me my flaws. "What do you want from me, Levi? I know I fucked up okay! You don't have to tell me shit! You don't know the shit I've been thought, Levi-"

"That you fucking chose F/n!" He shouted back at me, "I would have given you the world, but you decided you wanted him instead. You did this to yourself! You cheated on me, and even now I'm still here like a fucking idiot, I'm here to help you, and you won't even let me!" 

I took a step back. This is what he thought. He thought I really was a whore. But I shook my head I don't even care, "You fucking idiot." I said in a more quiet voice. I didn't choose this life because I wanted it. This was so fucking infuriating. I never wanted any of this. But I was crying harder now; I could bearly see. "I never cheated on you!" I screamed at him.

I couldn't see how Levi reacted because my vision was so clouded and I kept rubbing my eyes, "You expect me to believe that after all these-" 

"He fucking raped me, Levi," I cut him off. 

"What?" 

"That night-that fucking party we went to-" No matter what happened or how long it's been I hated thinking about it, talking about it was even worst. And this is the first time I've told anyone. But Levi needed to know. He needed to know why I picked this life. "He had a gun and was going to kill you unless I went with him." 

"F/n." By now I could see Levi again, and he looked so taken back, he tried to walk closer to me, but I put my hand out stopping him. I didn't want him touching me. 

I was angry at him. I know I have no right to be, but I know what he really thought of me now, He thought I was a whore who liked being pimped out by Samuel. He thought I enjoyed the beating and the different men every day. But that couldn't be further from the truth. "He was going to kill you if I didn't go with him, and there was nothing I could do so to protect you I went with him." 

"I-I" Levi was studdering. 

But I didn't care. I didn't need his help, and I didn't need him judging me like this. He didn't know me anymore, But still..."And if I had to do it all over again, and it meant you's stay safe I would. Because that's just how much I loved you, Levi." 

He called out my name again, but I ignored him and walked out the door. I didn't want, or need this. I can figure things out myself. 

Levi pov

I had to lean on something. 

F/n's words were replaying in my head over and over. He-Samuel had-No. No that couldn't have happened. She had-but she was acting- I didn't want to believe it because it was the worst possible thing to happen. But all the pieces were coming together. It made sense. No matter how much I wished, it didn't. 

What the fuck was wrong with me?

I ran after her. Outside I could see the security guard standing at the end of the hall, "The girl where did she go?" I asked. He started to point down the hall, and I had already started running for her. 

I was such a fucking idiot. 

All this time. She's been with that bastard because I didn't try harder when she left. Because like an idiot I believed she cheated on me. Fuck, I should have knew better it was F/n! She would never cheat on me! We were in love. We were going to work on us. It was so out of character of her I didn't even take time to think it was because of something else. I was just so fucking angry. Even now the way I just went off on her no wonder she left. She didn't deserve this! She's been going through this all alone because she was trying to protect me.

This my fault. 

F/n had no blame in this; she's perfect. Her life is ruined because I didn't even try. I didn't love her enough. I had to fix this. Shit. I don't even think I can. But hell I can try. I was going down the street it wasn't that long since she left. She shouldn't have gone that far. 

"F/n!" I called her name out loud. It was in the afternoon. No one was really out here. "F/n!" I called out again. Where did she go? I had to make this right. I turned the corner and felt relief seeing her back, but she was just standing there. Then dread washed over me. There was a car in front of her, and in the back looking at her from the window was the son of the bitch. 

I ran to her. "F/n! Get away from him." I yelled. Never again. He can't have her. He wasn't going to touch her ever again. I'd kill him myself before he got close enough. I got to her and pulled her behind me. 

"Levi what ar-" 

"Get' back to the house."

"Levi-" 

"Damnit," Samuel said loudly. Just hearing him talk made me want to kill him. He ruined her life. I think back to before I let her leave she trusted him. She trusted him and he- "I don't want to make a scene here Hollywood, just let F/n get in the car and we call it a day. It took me forever to find the bitch already; I'm tired. I'm sure you have your own work you need doing_" 

"Shut the fuck up," I told him. I didn't have to hear him. I took F/n's hand and started to walk away going the same way I came. He as no right to even see her. He should be in jail.

"Levi, he's going-" 

"He's not doing shit," I Samuel didn't seem like he was that dumb there might not be that many people out right now, but this was still right outside the city. "Just come back home with me." 

"Levi-" 

"Get the fuck back over here," I heard him yell. Then I heard the car door slam. I turned and looked he was outside the car and had a gun in his hand pointing it our way. But before I could do anything someone had taken him down surprising me. 

It was two of the guys from the security company I hired. I didn't even realize they were here. But I didn't want to stay and watch them take Samuel down; I needed to get F/n back home. I looked at F/n who was watching the whole thing with no expression on her face. 

My heart just kept breaking every time I looked at her now. She's been through so much, and the worst part she didn't have too. If I had just known. If I had just tried harder. I shook my head; there was nothing I could do now, I can only make her better, I can only fix her. And I have to be the one to do it. It was my fault this happened in the first place. 

We got back into my studio without saying anything to each other. I didn't even know what to say to her. Where do I start? I was just being such an asshole to her. How do I ever make this up?

She was sitting down on the couch. 

Where do I start? 

"We detained the man up the street, and taking him to the police now." One of the guards said standing in my doorway. 

I nodded feeling a bit of relief. Maybe this would make her happy? Knowing that he was going to jail. Something tells me he won't be staying there long, but at least he's not a problem right now. The security man left. And I closed the door. 

What do I say to her? 

I walked in slowly and saw she was crying, I closed my eyes, hurting seeing her like this. And now it was a whole knew hurt. I can't believe I had blamed her for this. It wasn't her fault. None of this was her fault. 

"I'm sorry F/n," I told her. 

F/n tried to stop crying, "It's not. I don't blame you for anything." 

I got closer to her, "But I do. I shouldn't have let you go. I should have never let you out of my sight." 

She was crying heavier, "I'm the one sorry, I was only trying to protect you. I didn't mean to do this to us." 

"You did nothing wrong." But she only cried more. I moved to hold her in her arms. "You didn't do anything wrong, you kept me safe," I told her rubbing her hair. F/n smothered her face in m chest and cried. She needed me. She says she didn't, but I know she does. She doesn't have to be alone anymore; I'm back. "I'm never letting you go either. I'll always be here. I promise nothing like this will ever happen again." I told her kissing her head. She needed to know I was here, and I wasn't going anywhere. 

"Well, leave for L.a. in the morning. And you're with me. Forever, I won't ever leave you again." I told her. I didn't care about anything else. F/n was my priority. I've neglected her for five years; no more. She was with me again. 

"Promise?" She said through her tears.

I kissed her head again, "I promise."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Alright! The cat is out of the bag! What will Reader and Levi do now? And how is moving to L.a going to affect their relationship? Thoughts?
> 
> Anyways that was three chapters I did since I didn't really post as much as I wanted to last week, that being said idk when the next chapter will out depend on how fast I can write and how much sleep I get tonight. And it's 1:50 am as I type this and I gotta be at work at ten tomorrow, so will see.
> 
> Again thank you all so much for reading! I hope you've all enjoyed these last few chapters; I can wait to hear your thoughts about it! 
> 
> xoxo


	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NEW CHAPTER!!!

Your Pov

"It might get wild out there, so put this on," Levi told while putting up my hood on my hoodie. 

"And here," He said putting some sunglasses on me. 

The plane Levi and I were on was about to land. He had told me when we get to the airport things would get crazy. So he gave me a hoodie and some sunglasses to keep my identity safe. He said it couldn't be helped. And since they're a lot of things in the press talking about him. No doubt the paparazzi is out there. 

I just nodded at him. Levi was used to this and knew what would happen. Not me so I should trust him about this. 

"John over there will walk with you to the car, I'll leave first, I won't see you for a few minutes, but I'll be with you as soon as I can," Levi told me pointing to one of his bodyguards that got on the plane after we landed. 

I nodded again. 

This...This was all so strange. 

I really haven't talked to Levi since yesterday. But after those guards took Samuel and Levi brought me back to his house...I don't know...I kinda have hope things might get better...I don't believe it one hundred percent. But...When has Levi really ever let me down...He just wants to help, and maybe just maybe...Things will be different. But this was still weird. I don't think I've ever been out of state before...and now I'm here In L.A.

"Listen," Levi said taking me out of my thoughts. "I'm only leaving out first so no one will pay attention to you. They don't know you're will me if they did it would be a whole other type of shit show. And I don't want that for you. I'll be in the car; I won't leave you." 

"It's okay, I'll be fine," I told him. 

Levi just looked at me; it was like he wanted to say something else, but he didn't. Levi sighed, "I'll see you in a bit." 

Then he left off the plane.

"It's this way," The large man said moving his hand for me to get off the plane after a few minutes. 

I sighed, I guess this is my new life, and I'm starting over. When I get off this plane, It's my chance to begin a new life. I don't have to be F/n the whore anymore...I can be anything...This was so much bigger than Levi...This was about me now. I don't have to worry about Samuel anymore...he's not in L.A. he can't hurt me here. He can't hurt Levi here...I can do this. 

I got off the airplane and felt the hot sunshine in my face. 

I can do this. 

Levi Pov

After going through a swarm of fans and paparazzi, I finally made it to the car. And we drove off a little ways away so we could get F/n. 

This was still something I couldn't get used too even after the last five years. I get no privacy when it comes to being out in public, and I really hate it. Even worst now I have F/n in this mess with me. If I can keep her out of my drama, I will. She has enough problems she doesn't need mine too. 

Although I just no when Cira finds out she'll flip. But I'm sure she'll get over it. She may be harsh, but she's reasonable. F/n needs me, and I'm the only one who can help her. She's my responsibility. F/n has always been. I still can't believe what she went through. All I can do is blame myself. If I had tried harder if I had kept looking for her if I didn't doubt her. None of those awful things would have happened to her. I hate myself knowing I could have prevented this, but I didn't. All I can do now Is try to help her. I'll still do anything for her. We may not be together like we used to be, but she's still F/n. I mean I may be in love with Cira but F/n being here won't change that. Things are different, but they're not that different. I love F/n still...but just not like that. I shook my head; I shouldn't be thinking of it like this. I should just be doing what I can to fix her. 

We waited a few more minutes, and finally, I saw the car F/n was supposed to be in pull in fount of us. She got out of the car with John, and they walked over. F/n got in the backseat with me. "Are you okay?" I asked her. 

"Levi, I'm fine you can calm down." She said with a small smile. 

I don't think I can. We haven't really talked since yesterday. After I brought her back into the house and she cried in my arms and she went to sleep. And this morning I hurried and left. I just wanted to put all this shirt behind us so that she could move on. She didn't need anything there. I should have never left her there. But now we were sitting in the back of the car this was the first time she was really up since yesterday, cause when we were on the plane, she was asleep too. I guess she was just tried. I don't blame her for it though; I'd be tired if I've been what she has in the last five years too. 

"So we're going to your house?" She asked. 

"Yeah," I answered her. I didn't mean to be awkward, but part of me doesn't know what to say to her. Do I even have the right to try and be friends with her? 

"How's your mom and Mikasa? Do they stay with you?" F/n asked.

"No, Mikasa is in school and lives in her dorms, and my mom lives on her own, but it's not that far from me." Now that I think about it I hadn't mentioned them since F/n, and I have reunited, "They'll be happy to see you again." I know they would. Back then my mom was worried when F/n left, but she never tried to look for either. She might feel guilty when I tell her what happened to F/n if either of us had tried just a little harder F/n would have been with us. Mikasa too, but she was the only one who tried to push us to go find her. I should have listened.

"Can you not tell them..." F/n said in a small voice.

"Hmm?" 

"About what I was doing...what happened. Can you not tell them," She asked me.

She probably feels ashamed, "I won't." F/n turned back to the window after I answered her. She seemed content with that. I bet she feels guilty that some how all this is her fault. But it isn't. She only did that to protect me. 

I sighed to myself; she shouldn't have to feel like this. "I'm sorry F/n." 

"Levi stop. I don't blame you." 

"But I do. If I had just tr-" 

"Please stop." F/n said cutting me off, "You're here now." 

I looked at her; she was smiling at me. It wasn't a happy smile it was still sadness in it, and I hated that. I wanted her to be happy, I want her to feel free, and be herself. She shouldn't have to go through this. It isn't right I want to see the light back in her eyes. But ai didn't say anything instead I gave her my best smile. 

"I'll make this right F/n." 

She didn't respond. I can only pray she believes me.

Your Pov

We pulled up to Levi's house, and it had to be on of the biggest houses I've ever seen in my life, "You live here?" I asked him. We had just pulled in from the gate; the house was white and gold on the outside. It wasn't too flashy or anything, but it was just...Huge.

I could hear the smile in his voice, "Yeah," 

"You really are some big high roller now aren't you," I joked.

"Tch, if that's what you call it."

I followed Levi into his house. The inside was just as huge as the outside; Everything was a clean white with and sliver. There wasn't a lot of decor around it was pretty simple despite what the outside of it looked like. But it was still big. I felt like if I yelled, I could hear my own echo. Over all, it was all just very...Levi. 

"You like it?" Levi asked me.

I turned to him and smiled, "It's very you, so yes." 

Levi smiled back at me. 

I think that might have been the first time he really smiled at me since we've been together...I looked away. I don't deserve that. I really don't deserve this...I know I should be trying to start over, but there is this nagging in the back of my head. 

Levi and I had settled down in the kitchen. When we got in there, I saw the backyard that had a pool in it. I walked to the door, "You have a pool?" 

"And A gym downstairs and a movie theater too," he bragged. 

I couldn't believe it. I know I've heard of celebrities having stupid rich things in their house, but this was another level. "Now I think you're just bragging Levi." 

"A little yes." 

"Ass." 

Levi shook his head taking a water bottle from his refrigerator, "Thrusty?" 

I shook my head, and kept wondering around his house. This was so different then anything I've ever seen before. And to think this was Levi's house...This was his life now. Huge mansions, red carpets, parties. Cameras and fangirls. He was living in a completely different world. One that I'm sure I don't even belong in.

"So I realize you don't have anything...like cloths or anything." 

I looked back at Levi who had followed me into the living room, "Oh..Well...I could get a job, and umm Work until I get-" 

"I have it under control," He said cutting me off, "Anything you need I got it alright." 

"Levi I have to pull my-" 

"Right now just let me take care of you. Let me help you get on your own two feet." 

I huffed out, "I mean I get that, but part of that is letting me get a job." 

Levi looked away, "You're right, but you don't have to do that right now." He looked back at me, "For right now, Let me do everything for you, please." He begged.

I didn't like this idea. I didn't like the idea of having Levi do everything for me. I don't like the thought of anyone having to do anything for me, but when it comes down to it, I do need the help. I sighed, I don't really have a choice in the matter. "Fine." But when I get on my own, I'll pay him back. I already owe him so much.

"Thank you," Was all Levi said.

We went quite for a while, "So do you want to go shopping?" 

I raised my eyebrow at him. "Wouldn't that cause a problem? Going out in public?" 

"We can go a bit further out, that way no one will see us," He answered. 

"Er, sure...But can we do that another day?" Levi says it won't be a problem, but I think he's just saying that so I won't feel bad. So If I can put it off, I will. "Right now...I just want to sit down for a bit if that's fine." 

"Sure anything." Levi said, "We can watch a movie, I can eat, sit down and read, listen to music anything you want." 

Levi was so caring, even after all this time he still cares so much. "How about just a movie?" I asked. 

Levi nodded then walked up to me, "You'll love this," He said taking my hand and leading me to another room. We went downstairs passing what looked like another living room and into a mini theater. "Seriously?" I couldn't help but say.

"I told you I had one." 

"Yeah, I know, but this is...just unbelievable." I was a bit speechless. I mean it was a mini movie theater in his house. You just don't see that...ever.

"I got some movies over there; You can pick out what you want to watch, I'll start up some popcorn." He said walking away. 

I looked over to the side where he said he had movies, and I think my eyes went a bit wide, he had a wall filled with movies! I bet every movie ever made was here. I walked over and tried to pick out something. But I'll be honest it was a bit overwhelming.

"You find something?" Levi asked walking behind me.

"Here this one is alright," Levi picked one up. 

"What's that?" 

"A musical, the greatest showmen. You still like musicals right?" 

"I haven't really watched a movie in a long time...but I'm sure I'd like it," I told him honestly.

Something seemed to cross his mind, but Levi didn't say anything; instead, "Let's just watch the movie, okay?" 

I nodded. Levi went to put the movie on then went and sat down first and relaxed on the couch; I watched him not realizing I was staring. It's still just so strange seeing him after all these years. It's not like he's changed that much, be he's older now, and maybe more mature; which in of itself is strange because Levi's always been mature. Shaking my head I went to move to sit, but Levi gave e this funny look.  
"What?" 

"Why are you sitting all the way over there?" 

"What? It's not that far." 

There were about 10 feet between us. I sat down on the other side of the couch. 

"Seriously?" Levi asked. 

I laughed to myself a little, but what did he want me to do? 

Levi got up and moved closer to me throwing a cover over both us. He wasn't uncomfortable close, but still, it was the closest I think we've sat next to each other and I wasn't crying or something else messed up going on. 

It was just us being...normal I guess. 

Levi Pov

We watched the movie, and F/n seemed to be enjoying it. 

She seems like she's trying to enjoy everything it's still sadness behind her, but I want to say she's trying. Or at least It's still easy to talk to her. Then again it's always been. My point is I'm grateful nothing has been awkward. 

I kinda stopped watching the movie myself and got lost in my own thoughts about F/n. Just trying to figure out where do I start with her. LIke I have her with me but where do we go from here? She already wants to get a job, but I think that's too soon. If I had it my way she'll stay here forever, but I know we can't do that. Not just because of Cira, but because I know F/n is still her own person, she already doesn't seem to like the idea of me taking care of her. 

But it's what I want to do she shouldn't have to take care of herself right now; she should just let me handle everything now. I want her to stay here so she can do whatever it is she wants. I want her to want for nothing. Anything she wants I'll give it to her, I can do that for her now. 

The movie was close to the end I noticed. I was about to ask her if she wanted to watch something else but that's when I noticed she was asleep herself. I looked over her; this was the most peaceful she's looked since we've been back together. 

I couldn't help but smiled. This is how I want her to look all the time.

I moved to pick her up she needed to sleep in a bed. As I looked at her and got her up, I couldn't help but noticed some of the bruises on her arms, I've seen them there before, but it still hurt to see. I hate myself for leaving her. I'm just happy she survived. F/n is so strong. She's always been. So I know she's not going to let helping her be easy, she probably thinks she has to be strong and protect herself, but no more, "I'm here now F/n," I couldn't help but say out loud to her while she slept. "You're still important to me; I won't let anything happen to you ever again." 

I know she couldn't hear me, but I still wanted to get that out. I was walking to the room I was going to give her. She could stay here for as long as she wanted.

"What the actual fuck!" 

Shit. I looked up and saw Cira standing there with rage in her eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading!!
> 
> I'm rushing through these notes because I should be walking to work right now, but I hope you all liked this chapter sorry it took forever to get out but writer's block is a bitch. But I just had to get this one out now!! So pretty please comment tell me what you think of it! 
> 
> xoxo


	37. Chapter 37

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter!!!
> 
> The song for this chapter is happy without me by chole x halle I think it makes it a more emotional, you can find in the song in the playlist too!: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2kBd98ZbURnhuH4T68ukRt

Levi Pov

Shit. Shit Shit. 

Cira wasn't supposed to be back so soon. I had wanted to be able to take my time and tell her about F/n not that she comes in and sees me walking her to a room. 

"What the fuck is going on Levi!" She said glaring at me. No doubt she was making her own assumptions. She's so fucking dramatic. 

"It's nothing, give me a second," I said walking passed her I didn't want to wake up F/n. Not to this at least. 

Cira reached out and grabbed my shoulder"You had better-" 

But I glared back her, and she went quiet, "I said I'll be right back." 

Cira didn't say anything after that. Thankfully. I hurried and brought F/n to a door away from my own; I wanted her close in case she needed something she could just come right to me. I could tell by now she was already up. No doubt Cira yelling had woke her.

"Tch, you can stop pretending you're sleeping now," I told her once I laid her down. I don't blame her for acting like she was still sleeping. 

F/n sat up, "How'd you know?" 

"You're still pretty to read F/n," I told her. 

"Levi, I'm sorry I don't want to cause any trouble for you-" 

"It's fine. Cira is...Well, She's just Cira," I told her scratching the back of my head it was hard to describe her. "I should go talk to her before-" 

"Before what? She finds you out here cheating with a whore!" Cira said standing in the doorway. I sighed, I didn't need this right now. 

"Cira-" 

"Who the hell are you? And why are you in my house with my ma-" 

"Would you quit it!" I snapped at CIra who was going off on F/n who just sat on the bed wide-eyed. Cira didn't seem like she wanted to listen and was still going to charge for F/n, but I stopped her and grabbed her by her arm and pulled her into the next room.

"Levi you had better start explaining this right now, or you'll wish you'd never been born!" She yelled as I closed the door. 

I pinched the bridge of my nose, "Remember when I said I would bring an old friend that needed my help home? That's her. F/n she doesn't have anywhere to stay, and she's-" 

"Stupid pretty, and your ex-girlfriend!" Cira said, "I'm not fucking stupid Levi Ackerman! I remember that stupid name, and why you didn't want to date me when we first met. What the fuck are you thinking? Bringing her here. Did you say she screwed you over? That you hated her? Why is she in my house, and why are you helping her?" 

I sighed, "It's not like that," I told her. I have to give Cira credit; she actually remembered that. All those years ago when I first moved to L.A., I was so angry about F/n thinking she had really cheated. And Cira was there for me, granted I don't think it was for the right reasons back then, but I was lonely, and she was there, and after time I started to love her. LIke I said she had a more aggressive personality, but I sometimes liked that about her. Deep down I know she cares, but she also cares about her career too, and how the public sees her, her only fault is sometimes that just goes a bit overboard.

"Yeah, It's F/n my ex," I explained to her, "But It's...It's complicated." I told her I didn't want to put F/n's business out there, but at the same time, Cira does have a right to know. "Look she got into some trouble, and I have to help." 

Cira shook her head, "She's a grown ass woman, tell her to help herself." 

"It's not that simple. I told you, we grew up with each other. I can't abandon her." 

"She cheated on you, it's what the bitch deserves if you ask me," Cira said crossing her arms.

"Please don't call her out of her name like that. Like I said it's not that simple, she had her reasons for what she did back then, and all you need to know is It's not an issue." 

"Levi-" 

"I made a promise," I said cutting Cira off again, "I promised her mom a little before she died that I would take care of her, and I didn't, so now I'm trying to do my best. You won't be able to change my mind about it either, F/n is staying here." 

Cira huffed out some air, "What's that supposed to mean?" 

I sighed and pulled her into a hug and kissed her, I can see how this is upsetting. I didn't want to tell her like this, but she's here. "It just means what I said. I'm helping an old friend nothing more. You don't have to worry; there isn't anything going on between us. That ended a while ago; I just want to get her back on her feet." 

"Then she's out of here?" 

I sighed again, "Yeah, then she's out." I told her. I didn't want F/n to leave ever again, but it was still her life, and I can't keep her locked up with me forever. 

"Fine." Cira said after a while, "You better be quick with helping her; You have a movie you're shooting in a few more weeks remember? And I'm not sitting here with the tramp all day." 

I rolled my eyes to myself, "You have to be nice though Cira." I pulled back and looked into her eyes, "F/n's been through a lot. She doesn't need you giving her more shit okay? So be nice." 

She rolled her eyes at me.

"Cira." 

"Fineee," She said in a sarcastic tone, "I can play nice. I am an actress after all." 

"Tsk," I rolled my eyes and gave her a kiss, "Thank you." 

This might not be so hard. 

Your Pov

I sat in the room Levi brought me in alone. 

I really shouldn't be here. Seeing his girlfriend kinda made it clear. I mean this is Hollywood for goodness sake. This is nothing like the real world. He has his own life; I can't just here taking up space...he was already happy without me. He doesn't need me in his way.

And not to mention his girlfriend. She was beautiful! Like I don't think I've ever seen anyone as gorgeous as her! She was like a real-life Amazon woman or something. He was doing so well. He doesn't need me. I should be thankful he brought me out here away from Samuel, but now I need to go on my own. I'll be fine. 

Just then a knock was at the door. "You can come in," I told them no doubt it was Levi. 

He walked in leaning on the door frame, "You okay?" 

I nodded, "Thank you, Levi, for all you've done, but I can't stay here. All I'm going to do is cause you trouble, and that's the last thing I want to do." 

"Tch, I'm not letting you leave...at least right now, you're fine. Just let me take care of you alright." He protested. 

I didn't say anything else, I don't think he's going to let me leave honestly, but that didn't mean I couldn't try. "Well, is everything alright between you an-" 

"The name is Cira," His girlfriend said walking into the room, "Yours?" 

I stood up off the bed and walked up to her, "F/n," I said giving her a little handshake. Like I said she was beautiful, and she was taller than me and just had this ora of confidence over her like she knew she was the best thing to hit this earth since sliced bread. She knew she wall all that and that I was nothing. And it was intimidating, and scary. Not to mention she was towering over me. I couldn't even look her in the eye. She was what I pictured what a real woman was. There was no way any man would want me when compared next to her...Levi did well for himself...

"I'm his girlfriend, we've been together for the past five years," Cira told me.

"F/n is aware of that," Levi told her. 

Cira just clicked her tongue, "I hear the two of you grew up with each other, you'll have to tell me about him when he was younger," She said tilting her head, in a more friendly tone. 

Now when I was with Samuel after a while I wasn't his only girl, he had ended up having more girls he's pimped out, I was just his favorite. And working with those girls I could tell the ones who liked me, the ones you didn't, and the ones who just didn't care. It was all in the way they talked to me or just how they acted. Most of them didn't seem to care, I mean It was hard to care about the things we were doing, not caring was the best way to get through a night. But every now and then I'd be around one of the girls who did care, and wanted to get in Samuel's good graces so to speak, which meant they hated me. Basically, I was getting that same vibe from her. 

She clearly didn't like me. 

And for a good reason, I mean would you like some rando your boyfriend brought home? She had every right to hate me.

"I guess I'll have to tell you some stories then," I answered her. I really don't think I should be here.

She just smiled at me, "Well, I'm going to go cook something, you're welcomed to join us. Come on Levi." Then she walked away. 

Levi looked at me, "She can be a little...well 

"She's fine, she's really nice," I told Levi I didn't want him to worry. He's helping me after all. 

"Sure, well. We're going to cook something you can come down with us," Levi told me. No thank you, was all I could think.

"I'm not really hungry." 

Levi tilted his head at me, "You're lying. I know you have to be a little hungry. I promise it won't be awkward." 

How was it he can read me so well? It's almost like he's gotten better at it. That or I've gotten worse at hiding my thought from him. Most likely the latter. "Fine," I said getting up what's the worst that could happen?

~Later~

Just being here was the worst thing that could happen. 

They were disgusting.

Well not Levi he just seemed to be going with it, but Cira was all over him while they were cooking. Lingering touches, little jokes the whole nine yards. And here I was the third wheel just sitting here like an idiot. I hate this...I shouldn't be here. But In a way I guess it was nice. Nice to see Levi acting natural. This was his life now...a life without me. 

I have to admit. Some part of me still loved him. I mean I always loved him. Nothing ever made me stop, but it's different now, is a grown man; with his own life, one that I'm not apart of. Yes, he's been nice enough to bring me here, but it's because he feels guilty. What other reason could it be for? He's guilty because he knows what happened to me, and now he wants to do better. That was it; he didn't love me the same way anymore. And that's okay. Like I said it's been a like a lifetime why would he feel the same way about me? He had everything in his life he could ever want. Fame, family what more could I even offer him. I should just be content that I can see him up close again. 

"Oh I forgot you were even here F/n," Cira said taking me out of my thoughts, "Dinner is ready, you can help yourself right?" She said sitting down at the table I was at. 

"Tch, I made you a plate," Levi said putting a plate down in front of me. 

"Oh, you didn't have too," I told Levi giving him a small smile.

"Yeah, you didn't," Cira added.

I didn't say anything back to her. I just looked at the food. It had been a while since I ate a real meal like this. Shit, even that's an understatement. I haven't had anyone do anything like this for me since...well since I left. I took a bite of the pasta, and it was delicious...It was the best thing I think I've had in years. It...it was unreal...Just being here, was unreal. Someone taking care of me. It's unreal. I don't deserve it.

"Gross, what's the deal with you?" Cira said.

"F/n are you alright?" Levi asked getting up close to me.

I didn't realize it, but I was crying. I wiped my face, "Oh, I'm sorry. It's fine," I got up. "Um, where is the bathroom?" 

"Down the hall on the left," Cira answered eating her food. 

I nodded. I needed a moment to myself. I for inside the bathroom and splashed water over my face. I needed to get myself together. But that was a bit overwhelming. 

"F/n are you alright?" Levi asked on the other side of the door. 

I opened it up to see him, "Yea, I'm fine, sorry I freaked out there it...that was just a lot." 

"You're not going through a withdraw or anything are you?" 

I shook my head, "No, I'm fine. Thank you for asking but you should go back to her she might get the wrong idea." 

"It's fine; she's fine with you here, she knows I'm helping you out. You won't have to worry about anything else just you getting better alright, just come out when you're ready, alright. we'll be sitting out there." 

I sighed, 'I'm fine now," I followed him out the bathroom. I don't need him worrying about me. I just got on my never when I know he was. I mean it only stressed me out more, couldn't he see that? This whole situation just...sucks. I don't want to worry him, but I just no that's all I'm going to do. I stopped in the hallway as we were walking back, "Levi I can't do this." 

He turned to me, "Do what?" 

"This thing you just worrying about everything I do. I hate feeling like I'm worrying you I don't want that." 

Levi shook his head, "Calm down; I'll try and chill out. But you know you worry me you know." 

"I just-" 

"Leviiii," Cira sang his name from the kitchen, "Your food is getting cold." 

"We should go back," I told him walking back into the kitchen. I sat back down, "Sorry about that." 

Cira gave me a fake smile, "No biggy." 

We all started to eat without saying anything. To say it was awkward would be a huge understatement. But the CIra cleared her voice, "So Levi you and Levi used to date?" She said.

I picked at the veggies on my plate never looking at either one of them, "Yeah." 

"How cute, was this before he came out here? I mean I guess it had to be. Have you seen our show together? It was there we met." 

"No. I've never actually watched it," I answered her. 

"Oh, well you got to. It's pretty good show wise. Not to mention Levi's abs are in it," Cira laughed, "Why would you ever leave him? He's such a great guy." Cira leaned in closer to me like she was trying to tell me a secret but she was still loud enough for Levi to hear, "I mean he's such a great guy? You gotta be cray cray to leave him for like anyone. Not to mention he's the hottest guy in Hollywood right now." 

"Cira, please," Levi cut in.

"I'm just saying," She shrugged, "Now my issue is trying to get him to pop the question. It's been five years already. Hey!" Her face brightened up, "You guy are like BFF's you tell him to get on board." 

I didn't know how to respond to any of that. So I just smiled, "Yeah, don't keep the girl waiting too long." I said to Levi. 

I didn't know what else to say to that. She certainly did talk a lot. I'm sure she said most of that to tell me to back off. That I already had my chance. She was right too. I may still have feelings for him, but there wasn't anything I could do about that. I have to push them down. Levi is only in my life now to help me get on my two feet then I'll be on my own again. 

Once we were all done eating, I told them I'd clean up since they cooked. I wanted to pull my weight somehow, and this was my only way right now. Tomorrow I'll start looking for a job. After I was done cleaning up, I walked back over to my room. And just when I thought it couldn't get any worse being here, it did. 

I mean it is their house. I'm just a guest. But did she have to be so loud? 

They were in their having sex. And she was a screamer. 

I took a deep breath. I was going to be alright. I could get past this. By now I was in the room he gave me and was laying here. I can't even sleep though. She's so loud. I can't help but wonder if she's being that way on purpose. 

I tossed and turned in the bed. I wish I had some earphones. I mean who wants to hear they guy their still in love with making love to another woman. 

I shook my head, get over it. I just have to get over it. Anything. I started to feel heavy...no not heavy. Dizzy? What was this? I needed...I needed a hit. I sat up. I have no idea where I'd get it either. Levi wasn't going to let me get a hit. But I needed it. I started breathing heavy. There's no Sam to get it from either. Maybe I could go somewhere close? I mean this is L.A. someone has to have it. The more I thought about it, the more stressed I was getting. I got up and started to walk around the room. I needed it. I put on some shoes I needed to get out of here. I needed to find someone who had it. If I didn't, I'd die. I wouldn't be gone long Levi was with his girlfriend any way he wasn't even thinking about me. 

I'd be quick. he wouldn't even miss me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> What will ever happen now
> 
> xoxo


	38. Chapter 38

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoop! whoop!
> 
> New chapter!

Levi Pov

Cira was sleep now, and I was lying awake on our bed. I was trying to convince myself. It wasn't going to be so bad with them both here. Cira was a bit much, but that's just the way she acts. In a day or two, she'll be okay with F/n here.

I rubbed my face, who am I kidding? 

Cira can't even get along with my mom and Mikasa why would she get on board with F/n? But It shouldn't be that bad. Cira said she only came back in town so suddenly because she wanted to be here when I got back. But she'll be back in London in a day. So just tomorrow I'll with have to deal with her and F/n. It shouldn't be that big of a disaster, that is if today was a sign on how they'll act. The only problem was I think Cira she can be sassy, I bet she felt threatened by F/n being here. But she didn't have too; I don't feel the same about F/n...Things are different now. I love her still, I mean I'll always love her, but she's been through so much, and it would be wrong to try anything...not that I would. I mean she's still beautiful...And she is still F/n, and I do- no what am I thinking. I'm supposed to be helping her; not thinking of her in any other way. Besides, I have Cira at least for right now. I don' see myself ever proposing to her. She was okay for now, being honest I don't see myself being with her for the rest of my life.

I don't see myself being with anyone for the rest of my life. At least not now. It was a time it was with F/n, but even if Cira wasn't in the picture, I'm sure she's moved on. I bet somewhere in her mind she blames me for all that happened to her. If I had tried harder, if I had done anything, she wouldn't have had to go through that nightmare. 

I sighed, I couldn't sleep. So I got up without waking Cira up. I needed to clear my head. Maybe I'll watch a movie or something. I walked out of my room and saw F/n's door was open. I wonder if she could sleep? But when I got to the door, I saw she wasn't in here. Where did she go? Exploring the house maybe? She was pretty excited looking around it earlier it was so cute how she was acting. I went down to the kitchen, but I still didn't see her. 

It is a big house, or maybe she couldn't sleep and went to watch a movie.

I started to walk back that way passing the front door, but that's when I saw her sitting on the floor. Shit. 

"F/n!" I yelled running to her. I got down and turned her head to look at me, "F/n, what happened? Where are you going?" She was breathing heavy and sweating. Fuck, she was going through another episode. How long had she been here? I noticed her shoes where on. Was she going to leave on her own? "F/n" I called out to her again. How could I be so stupid to leave her alone? I should have been checking on her. She shouldn't have been here by herself. I was so concerned on what Cira thought I forgot about her. 

I went to pull her up, but she swatted my hand away, "I'm fine Levi," She snapped.

I was taken back for a bit, but I quickly recovered, "You're not fine," I said getting to her level.

"Leave me alone. I'm okay, I just needed some fresh air," She said still breathing heavy. She wasn't okay, why was she trying to just push through it? I was here why didn't she just get me?

I cursed myself. How'd I let this happen? This was my fault. "If you want some air we can go in the back," I said pulling her up, but she fought against me. 

"Don't touch me!" She screamed. 

"Let me help you-" 

"I don't want your help, let me leave!" She screamed. 

"You're not going anywhere." 

Next thing I knew I felt her hand across my face. And I started to feel a sting; she slapped me. But I wasn't giving up; this wasn't F/n this was the person that bastard Samuel made her. I just pulled her into my arms. She wasn't stronger than me. But she still protested. "Just let me go, Levi," She was crying. 

"I'm not going anywhere F/n." 

She started to cry, "Just go back to your perfect life, you don't need me! Let me Levi levi," I sighed listening to her cry, I all I could do was let her get her thoughts out, I didn't care if Cira woke up, but I doubt she would we were all the way downstairs, she was on the other side of the house and upstairs.

"Let me go," She just kept sobbing. But I wouldn't. I wasn't going to let her go. I could never do that again. The more F/n cried and fought against me the weaker I could feel her getting. I picked F/n up; I needed to get her in a bed. "It's going to be alright." That's what I kept telling her. That's what I have to keep telling myself.

I ended up bringing her to one of the rooms on the first level, I didn't need Cira waking up and seeing her like this, I know F/n would hate that, but I did need to lay F/n down. Thank God, I had seven furnished bedrooms, to choose from. 

I laid F/n down; she was still burning up. 

I still laid there with her, she needed me, and I wasn't going to go anywhere. By now she had calmed down, I was robbing her hair keeping it out her face, "I'm here F/n. I'm not going anywhere." 

I wasn't this was hard to see her go through, but I we can get through it. In the morning I'll find out something I can do to help her with these. But for now, all I can do is be here for her.

Your Pov

I work up still feeling tired. 

I felt heavy gross and sweaty. I felt like my throat hurt like I'd been throwing up all night...

Last night what happened? Just as I thought that everything started rushing back to me, fuck. 

How could I act so insane? I sat up, where was Levi? I have to apologize. All I remember was going off on him begging him to let me leave. I even slapped him. What was wrong with me? Levi is trying to help me, and I just mistreat him like that. I don't deserve anything he does for me. I looked around the room this was a different room than the one he gave me yesterday? I got up and started to walk out of the room. Looking in the hallway, everything felt so empty. But I could smell the hot tea coming from the kitchen. I guess Levi was in there. 

I slowly walked into the kitchen and saw him sitting at the table looking out the back door window. The sun was out I wonder how long I was out. 

"Er...hi" 

Levi looked over at me, a bit surprised. "F/n, you're up." 

"Yeah," I said looking away from him. "Good morning." I still stood by the door. I felt so ashamed for how I acted last night.

"How are you feeling?" 

"I'm okay," I told him. 

"You were out for like two days," He said in a low voice.

My eyes went wide, "Two days?" I asked not believing him. Levi nodded. How could anyone sleep for two days? What was wrong with me? And in those two days, Levi's been taking care of me? God, I didn't deserve him. 

I looked at Levi, "I am so sorry." I stepped a little closer to him. "I would understand if you want to put me out Levi, I don't deserve your help." 

Levi didn't say anything. 

Is that a sign saying he agrees? 

Levi took a deep breath. And I could feel my own heart breaking I hated doing this to him. I shouldn't be in his life. I shouldn't be causing him these problems I was better off with Samuel back home. "F/n I'm- It's fine," was all he said. But I could feel myself getting frustrated. 

"It's not fine Levi!" I couldn't help but say. "I don't want to ruin your life, Levi." 

"Is that what you really think F/n?" He asked. "You're not. It's that plain and simple." 

"Levi I-" 

Levi was looking away from me when he cut me off, "You know the last thing I talked to your mom about was protecting you." He looked at me. "I promised her I'd take care of you." 

I could feel myself getting more and more worked up about this, "I don't want your charity, Levi. You don't have to help just because my mom asked you to take care of me." 

"It's not just that-" Levi said getting worked up himself, but then he sighed, "You're important to me F/n, you've always been. My point is I won't abandon you...not again." 

I ran my fingers through my hair. I don't even know how to talk to him to get him to understand. It's honestly pointless. I just shook my head at him, "Fine." Then I started to walk away I needed a shower and to clear my head anyway. Levi won't listen to reason. I shouldn't be here, but he won't even let me. I wanted to cry, why can't he see that I'm trying to help him. Why was it I was always stuck places. Was I really never free? Even when it came to trying to help him? It was different, but it was still the same as being stuck with Samuel. I can never make my own choices. 

I don't think I was in the shower for too long, but then again I guess my perception of time is all fucked up. I don't know if it was because I was going cold turkey, but I couldn't help but feel drained. Or maybe it was because I slept for two days and threw up all the food in my system. God, I hated myself. 

As I got out the shower and walking into the room I had been in for the last few days I couldn't help but see the toothbrush and clothes on the bed. They weren't here when I went in...

Why was Levi so nice to me after all this? I...I just can't understand him. 

After I got dressed I walked back into the kitchen...I was well; I was starving. Levi was still sitting in here drinking his tea. I didn't say anything to him. I don't even know what to tell him. 

"I got some pancakes in the microwave if you're hungry," Levi said. 

"Oh," Was all I said. This was so awkward. I don't think I've ever had an awkward moment with Levi, I mean maybe a long time ago but...It's different now. I hate this. I went and got the food out. I could feel Levi's eyes watching me. He wasn't making this any easier.

"Er, did you and Cira make these?" I asked him. Now that I mention her, I haven't seen or heard her this morning. Shit, now that I really think about it she was here when I went off on Levi, I wonder what she thinks of me. Probably made her hate me more. 

"She didn't," Levi answered. "She left back for London last night actually." 

"Oh," I sighed, "Did she um...see me-" 

"No," Levi answered already knowing what I was going to ask. 

I wanted to say I was sorry for putting him through that again but I think he might be tired of me saying that so I stayed quiet. 

"Is there anything you want to do today? We can go shopping if you like?" He said. 

Maybe going out the house would be nice. "Sure...thank you for the clothes and toothbrush and stuff by the way.

"No problem, Anything in the house that's mine is yours." He told me, "Whenever you want to leave out we can go." 

"I guess after I eat I'll be ready, not like I have something else I can do," I told him.

He just nodded and left the kitchen. 

I sighed sitting there alone. The air between us is just so heavy, and I hate this. All I feel is guilty when I'm around him. I shouldn't be letting him do this for me. I shouldn't have let Samuel get me this far...I shouldn't have never talked to him. If I had just left him alone I-no, we wouldn't be in this situation. I ruined us. This was my fault.

~Later

I sat in the passenger seat with Levi. 

This was the first time I saw him driving since we've been reunited. I had come to the conclusion he didn't have to do that anymore, but here he was. I was looking around outside the window. It was amazing how this looked nothing like home, the trees the people, everything about L.A. felt like I was on another planet. To think this has been his life for like the last five years. I wonder if he's ever gotten used to it?

I looked over at Levi who was concentrating on the road. 

I wonder if he's mad at me or something. He still hasn't really talked to me. I don't blame him if he is. I mean what real reason does he have not to be? He can say that he just wants to help me because it's me but...I think it's just because he feels guilty. Which he doesn't have too. Staying there was my choice. 

After a while, we pulled up to another house. Levi said we were going shopping; maybe this was some fancy store. I wouldn't be surprised if it were. Or maybe he brought some clothes out somewhere that he'd have me pick from just cause he can't go out in public with me. I groaned to myself. See, me being here is such an inconvenience to him, he can't even leave his house with me. I shouldn't be here. 

"Are you going to come?" Levi asked standing outside the car. 

I didn't realize he had already got up. So I hurried and followed him. Levi walked in after putting a code into the door. So this place was really fancy. "What type of store is this?" I asked Levi as we walked in and I noticed it looked kinda like his house. 

"Idiot." I heard Levi mutter. 

"What was that?" I asked I couldn't help but feel a small smirk grow. That was a blast from the past there. Levi, calling me names. 

"It's not a store," He told me bluntly.

I frowned, "Then wh-" 

"Levi is that you? What did you have- Oh My God," I looked over at the familiar voice. 

It was Kuchel! 

"F/n!" She screamed. 

Before I could even respond, she had run over and hugged me. 

My mind was racing so fast. It was Kuchel! I wasn't expecting to see her anytime soon. I didn't even know how I looked I hadn't even put in effort into myself. What was she thinking? So many thoughts were going through my mind. When was the last time I saw her? When was the last time someone hugged me like this?

"I can't believe it's you," I could hear her say, "I've missed you so much." 

"I've missed you too," I told her trying to keep myself from crying. But Kuchel didn't let me go she kept holding me swaying side to side. Then I felt her sobbing. God, Now I was crying! 

"I've missed you so much," I cried. I really did. It wasn't just Levi who I missed being away from. When I agreed to go with Sam that day, I wasn't just trying to protect him. It was for her and Mikasa too. And to see her, here and now and know she was okay, gave me a piece of mind. Maybe it was worth it. Knowing that they're all doing okay. I mean that's what family did for each other take care of each other no matter the cost? At least that's what I thought back then. 

I don't know how long we stayed like, but it wasn't long enough. Being in Kuchel's embrace was the closest thing I've felt to something that reminded me of my mom in a long time. But Kuchel pulled away wiping her eyes. 

She was smiling, "Oh God, I've gotten all choked up. F/n let me look at you!" She looked over my face, and I gave her my best smile. Praying she wouldn't see past my mask and know how much I was really hurting mentally. She moved her hands down my shoulder and was holding my hands. "You look just like your mom when she was your age," She said with tears in her eyes. "So beautiful." 

God, she was making me cry, "Thank you. You don't look like you've aged a day," I told her truthfully. She looked like the same Kuchel I saw five years ago. 

She pulled me in for another hug. Kuchel then pulled away and put her attention on Levi, "Wait! Levi when did you find her? How long? What are you doing in L.A? Are the two of you together? What's going on? I need to call Mikasa to come over." Kuchel was rambling. I couldn't help but smile. She hadn't changed a bit. 

"Tch," Levi rolled his eyes, but I could still see the hint of happiness in them. He must be happy to see his mother this happy. "When I was out visiting Furlan we ran into each other," He told her.

Kuchel looked at me, "Wow, who would have thought? How have you been? Have you been taking care of yourself? Are you going to stay out here?" 

I started to get that guilty feeling again. I didn't want her to know what I was doing; I don't want her to be disappointed in me. I don't want to break her heart or make her look at me any different. I quickly nodded my head, "I've been fine." I smiled at her.

"I convinced F/n to visit for a while, that's why she's here," Levi said covering for me. 

I looked at him and sighed. I didn't deserve him. 

"By the way," Levi started to say, "I already called Mikasa she should be here in a few. And I think Bella is with her." 

"Bella?" I asked.

"She's out here going to school." 

"Oh," I said. Now that I think about it. I saw Furlan, but I never saw Bella any of the nights when I saw Furlan and Levi together, "Is she still with Furlan?" I asked.

Levi had already started walking further into the house, "Yeah, they're just doing a long distance thing right now." 

I smiled to myself. That was nice to know; some couples do stay together foever.

"Are you hungry?" Kuchel asked. 

I shook my head, "No, I just ate." 

She smiled at me, "Okay, well tell me what have you been up too? How's the city? It's been forever since I've been out there. I miss it." 

"Oh, everything is fine out there..." I trailed off I didn't want to talk about myself. 

"Tch, I like how you ask F/n if she wants to eat but don't ask me," Levi cut in. 

Kuchel rolled her eyes, "So what are you guys up to today?" I sighed to myself again. Levi was really good and getting her off topic. It was almost kind of funny.

Just then we all hurried the door open and closed. 

"This had better be nothing stupid Levi," I could hear that was Mikasa's voice. I was feeling excited to see her; I wonder how she looks now? I mean over the years I could see Levi on tv, but I couldn't see Mikasa grow. 

It took her a moment, but she walked into the kitchen.

"F/n!" She yelled.

I was about to wave hi at her, but before I could get the words out she had already embraced me with enough force to make me take a few steps back. I hugged her, "It's so good to see you," I told her.

"It's been too long," She said in a voice that was slightly above a monotone now. It was kinda weird I never remember Mikasa to be affectionate, but then again we haven't seen each other in five years. 

"Oh my fucking God!" 

Mikasa broke out hug but and it was Isabel running and hugging the two of us making the three of us fall on the floor. 

"I can't believe it's you!" Bella screamed.

I was so happy to be around people that I knew it was overwhelming and even while we all tried to get up between out laughter I found myself crying. It was too much. But when I rubbed my eyes, and we were all sitting on the floor I could see Bella was crying with me, and what had to be the biggest smile I ever have seen was on Mikasa's face. 

"I've missed you guys so much," I told them.

"We've missed you!" Bella said taking me in a hug again. 

We laughed like that for a while. Until Levi walked over, "Come on get off the floor," He said reaching his hand to help me up. 

I took it letting him help me, "Thank you." I said once I was up.

"Hold on," Mikasa said moving to stand next to her mom who had just watched us as we're on the floor.

"Are the two of you back together?" Mikasa asked.

I snatched my had away from Levi's, "No not at all." 

Mikasa and Kuchel both stopped and gave each other a look, and then looked back at us and started laughing.

"What was that?" Levi asked.

HIs mother looked at him, "You know what that was." 

"What are you doing up here anyway?" Bella asked me. She was now holding me on her side leaning her head on my shoulder. I couldn't help but noticed she hadn't gotten that much taller since the last time I saw her. 

"Oh, just visiting," I told them using the lie Levi gave his mother from earlier. 

"Speaking of, I came here to get the two of you," Levi said pointing at Mikasa and Bella, "F/n needs to go shopping." 

"And what does that have to do with me?" Mikasa asked. I couldn't help but chuckle, that was the way I was used to hearing them interact.

"Tch, F/n needs someone other than me to go shopping with. If it's just us, the press will be all over her and if I can keep her out of that stress, I will so." He told her. That was actually pretty smart. 

"Why does she need to go shopping anyway? Can't we do that another day? Let's all stay and catch up." Mikasa asked.

"F/n's bags got lost on the plane, and she can't stay in clothes," He told them.

I looked down at myself. I actually didn't mind. Being in Levi's sweats and T-shirts didn't really bother me. They made me feel comfortable, plus this was the closest I could be to him, I enjoyed it, but I supposed he doesn't want me wearing them and getting them dirty.

Bella started laughing, "I was going to ask why you were wearing that." 

I just laughed. I guess Levi had thought of everything. I really don't deserve him.

Mikasa rolled her eyes, "Fine, just give us a sec." 

"OOo, so I get to go shopping with The Levi Ackerman?" Bella joked. 

"Tch, Yes." 

"You guy just come back over when you're done," Kuchel said smiling at all of us, "I'll have some dinner ready." 

"You don't have-" Levi spoke up she cut him off.

"F/n is back with us, of course, I have too!" She yelled at him.

Levi clicked his tongue walking out of the kitchen. I moved and followed him leaving Bella Mikasa and Kuchel in the kitchen. 

"Thank you, Levi, for covering for me," I told him in a low voice so the others wouldn't hear me.

"It's cool," He said looking at me.

"Really, I appreciate everything you've done for me when I can repay you I will-" 

"Just repay be by having a nice day, and letting me take care of you today," Levi said cutting me off.

I still didn't feel right about him buying me stuff but, for him, I'd try. 

I smiled at Levi, "Okay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> So this chapter was kinda happy? Sorta? Lol Next chapter should be fun and a little fluffy, Reader and Levi deserve a little fluffy right? Then right back to the tears lol. Anyway, ~~ tell me your thought about this chapter I want to hear them! They fuel me and inspire me to write chapters faster! 
> 
> Again thank you for reading!!
> 
> xoxo


	39. Chapter 39

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally a new chapter!!

Levi Pov

The ride with the girls was refreshing. 

Refreshing because I got to hear F/n laugh and joke again. I knew having her see my mom and Mikasa would put her in a good mood. They were so happy to see her two. I knew they would be. It had just been so long for all of them. This was what we all needed in a way.

"God, there is so much I want to talk about, but I don't even know where to start!" Bella said to F/n. They were both sitting in the backseat Bella insisted that she sit back there with her. I didn't mind; I just want them to have a good day. I knew my idea was smart too. Having them all out together, no one will pay much attention to F/n because Mikasa and Bella were here. So they were more of a camouflage for us. And if the press did get noise, they'd just think she's one of Mikasa friends.

"What have you been up to F/n?" Mikasa asked her.

F/n shrugged, "You know nothing really." I know she didn't want to talk to them about what she was going through. And I know they'll ask a whole bunch questions. I was about to intervene again, but F/n had already beat me to it. "I want to know what you've been up too? Both of you?" 

"Just school now," Mikasa answered. 

"What are you studying?" 

"Nursing, I figured it would be fun to get into medicine," Mikasa said.

"Oh, wow. That's impressive Mikasa," F/n said sounding happy, "I always figured you'd get into something serious like that. What about you Bella?" 

"I've been studying Nursing too," Bella added. "I'm just out here for about two more months then I'll be back home. But I'll be back when the brake is over." 

"Oh, why'd you come out here?" 

"Ya know, cause big bro's out there plus it's been forever since I saw them, and I wanted to go to school somewhere else." 

"Nice, I get that. What about-" 

"What are you studying F/n?" Bella asked cutting her off. I looked at F/n through the rearview mirror at F/n to see how she would respond. 

"I'm actually not in school right now..." She trailed off. "Sorta just took a break from school." 

The Bella and Mikasa both nodded. It was like they wanted to stay something else but didn't. I looked back at F/n and saw a little sadness in her face, and I could feel my chest feeling heavy like it was when I was going through her withdraw with her. This shouldn't be her story. 

Now that I actually think about it. F/n never went back to school after she left me, Shit- I bet she never even got to graduate. That bastard. He ruined her life. He stole her from me and ruined her whole life, and I let him. She's missed out on some many things. Graduation, going to college, Prom, all those things she wanted to do, dancing and singing, being with me...just being a normal 20 and 21 one years old. Five years of her life just stolen; she can never get them back. The things she's had to go through, the people who've hurt her. As I sat there thinking about all the things she's missed out on and the things that happened- what could have happened, I was getting angrier and angrier. This was my fault. Of all the times to now believe her, I should have known better. It was fucking F/n she wouldn't have cheated on me. We loved each other; nothing would ever make her do that. I pushed her away. I could have tried. I could have done anything but leave her. 

"Levi, you okay?" Mikasa asked taking me out of my thoughts. 

I shook my head, "I'm fine." I glanced at F/n. She was sitting down looking at her hands. 

"We're almost there," I said. "When we get out it might take some them a moment to notice me, so we're going to just run out, alright?" 

"Wow, this is so exciting, I never get to see Big bro attacked by the paparazzi," Bella said all giggly.

"I like how you call my brother your big brother," Mikasa said to her making Bella laugh again. 

"Levi knows he's the brother I've never had and you're the sister I never had," Bella told them.

"Ugh, no you are not, F/n is my sister I never had," Mikasa told Bella sticking her tongue out at her. 

"Aw, you're the sister I never had," F/n smiled back at Mikasa. By now I had already parked And we were getting out. 

"So what type of clothes do you even wear F/n?" Mikasa asked grabbing her arm and pulling her closer to her.

As I watched them walking it was like Mikasa wanted to be close to her. Mikasa wasn't one to ever really want to be around people, even now. But here she was. Maybe she really missed F/n, but when I think about it, it wasn't like they were ever really close they talked and joked sometimes, but I was always closer to her. Now that I think about it Mikasa was angry at me for not looking for her. But back then I was just so angry thinking that F/n had cheated...In my head at the time I hated her for leaving, I didn't want anything to do with her. The idea of her broke my heart she was everything to me, and I thought she cheated. I was so mad, but I was so wrong. I should have known better we've known each other for our whole lives, there was no way F/n would ever do anything like that. 

"You okay Levi?" 

I looked up at F/n from the sound of her voice. I had been so lost in my own thoughts I didn't realize we had made it into the store. I shook my head, "I'm fine," I told her walking further into the store.

"Okay, What do you wear F/n?" Bella asked. "This place has everything!" 

"It does," F/n said in a low voice like she was trying to take everything in. I know L.a. can be a bit overwhelming. I hope she's alright with all this. I want her to enjoy herself, but I don't want her to stress out, Who knows what could happen. Not to mention I've been researching everything about what's going on with her, I have to take care of her. I can't just drop her off in some rehab. That would be like me giving up on her, and I won't do that, not to F/n we can beat this. 

I feel a bit guilty for lying to her, I told her I didn't tell Cira, or that she didn't know what was going on with her, but in truth, she did and got pissed at me before she left. She was trying to convince me to put F/n in rehab and that it wasn't my place to help her, and she did it to herself. I didn't go into all the details with Cira, but the point was, I was all she had. She lost her mom and her father in the same night, and then I left a few months later she's been alone with nothing but that asshole abusing her all this time.

"What about this?" Bella said taking me out of my thoughts again, "What?" I asked her looking over at her.

Bella rolled her eyes, "What about this dress?" She asked holding a pink dress in fount of F/n, "It's cute right?" 

F/n made a face saying she didn't really like it, I smiled, "Not her color." It was nice to know me, and f/n still had a bit of an unspoken language that no one but the two of us seemed to get. 

"As if you knew how to dress," Mikasa butted in. She turned to F/n, "You should have seen this suit her wore to this red carpet one time, It was gross Af." 

F/n started to giggle, "Why do I believe that," 

"Tsk, I know how to dress," I rolled my eyes at them looking through some clothes for F/n. She looked focused but still like she was trying. She had her concentrating face on. It was always cute. F/n has always been cute. I shook my head I can't be thinking of her like that. I should be looking for something for her to wear. I didn't even know what she wore now. Back when I saw her those two times She was wearing some skimpy outfit no doubt something he told her to wear. I looked back at F/n who was talking about something with Mikasa as they were looking at some clothes. She was smiling right now. It was nice to see, especially after the last two days with her crying and throwing nonstop. Seeing her like this makes it hard to believe a few hours ago she was suffering so much. Seeing her happy like this was all I wanted. 

"You're staring," I looked over Bella has whispered that next to me, "Are the two of you seeing each other." 

I walked a bit away from F/n and Mikasa. "No." 

"But you want to be? You're not still with Major pain in the ass Cira are you?" She asked me still in a whipser . 

"Leave me alone Bella," I told her walking away. I couldn't do this with her. F/n Isn't interested in me anymore, why would she want the man who abandons her and left her to that life. I wonder how many times did she cry at night wondering if I stilled cared. Only to see I was on Tv with Cira. I know deep down she hated me. 

And that's fine, I dersevered it. but if she wold let me help her then that's all I can ask for right now. 

F/n is beauful and a wonderful person, but she dersevers so much more then me. But damn to I want to try I just want to make her happy.

"You sure you're all right Levi?" F/n asked me again. Taking me out my thoughts. 

I looked at her. As long as she was with me I was, "Yeah, I'm okay. Let's find you something else." 

Your Pov

Levi seems really distracted today. I don't know what's up with him, but it's been kinda eating at me. I hope I'm not bothering him in any way. I'm sure they're a million other things he could be doing right now. I shook my head, I'm not supposed to be thinking like that right now, I tried to tell myself. He asked me to enjoy myself today and be happy. I have to at least try for him.

It wasn't like I wasn't having fun either, Being around Bella and Mikasa feels like the best thing that's has happened to me in a long time. 

"Okay, what about this?" Mikasa held out a shirt with a little mouse on it.

"That's-That's actually pretty cute," I told her smiling. She handed it to me. All the clothes that I liked they were putting in my hand so I could try them on. .But I'll be honest, most of them I had put back, It wasn't that I didn't like them I did. But unlike them, I was checking price tags. I'm not trying to be needy and go overboard with Levi's kindness. I just need like two shirts and a pair of leggins That's, it, I've survived this long with that. I don't need a whole bunch. I don't deserve it. 

"Okay but you have to love this!" Bella yelled throwing a dress up in my face.

"I might if I could see it," I told her. 

She moved it back and it was another cute little dress, but again, I think I had enough from this store, "Don't you guys think we got enough stuff?" 

"Dude you only have like three things in your hand," Mikasa said. 

"Yeah, and you only ended up like one shirt from the last store," Bella added, "I had no idea you were this picky." 

"I'm not- it's just," I couldn't tell them the truth, that I didn't like using Levi's money, and the only reason I don't have my own money was because everything I ever made was with Samuel because he was my pimp, and I've never had an honest job, That I would most likely never have one, that I was just a simple whore, while they graduated and are in school doing everything right with their lives. 

"Geez, if you don't want to look for anything else we don't have too," Bella said. "You don't have to cry F/n." 

I sniffed, I didn't even realize I was crying. I wiped my face, "I'm so sorry, I wasn't crying just- my eyes-er allergies." I tried to lie. "Let's just try these things on okay?" I told them walking to the dressing room now. What was wrong with me? Crying in fount of them? I need to get my shit together. 

I suddenly felt myself run into a hard chest, I looked up and saw Levi, he looked down me and once he saw my face I could see the worry in it. "F/n what's wrong? Where is Bella and Mikasa?" He asked.

I looked behind me and didn't see them. Where did they go? I shook my head, "I don't know, I'm fine." 

Levi used his thumb to wipe a tear off my face, "You're crying. That's not fine, are you alright do I need to talk to home? Are you hungry? Tired? Is this too much?" He bombarded me with all these questions then his voice went low, "You're not having a withdraw, are you? If you are its okay w-" 

"I'm fine, Levi," I told him taking a deep breath, if he's going to keep going crazy like this, I don't know how much I can take it. "I'm okay, it was nothing." 

"F/n we can take baby steps if this is too much for you we can leave," He told me. 

I mustered a smile at him, I need Levi to just chill cause when he gets, like this, he stresses me out, "I'm Fine."

"F/n, I just- Want you to-" 

"There you both are, let's go try on this stuff," Bella said interrupting Levi. I can only wonder what he was going to say. 

We walked to the dressing room and I tried them on. This was all so strange. It's been forever since I've done anything like this. I mean I've tried on clothes back at home but it was never with people and it was always for work, Samuel would say he was tired of seeing me wearing something, mostly after he had beat me in a particular outfit and felt a little guilty about it once he realized I couldn't get the blood out. Then he'd just throw some money at me and tell me to get something nice. This life now was so different. It was nicer, better, but it's not what I deserved. I did that to myself. I could have left. I could have just died fighting him back, at least then I wouldn't have to face them all with this shame.

"What is with you?" 

I snapped my head to the curtain, Mikasa had walked in with her hands on her hip while I was changing. "What the hell Mikasa!" I snapped at her. "Where is Levi? What are you doing?" I asked her. I wasn't upset she was in her, but she looked upset with me. 

"I'm not stupid, something is up, what is with you F/n? You were just crying? You've been here but you've been distance today too, you and Levi, what's going on between you?" 

I shook my head while buttoning up the shirt, "Nothing. I don't know what you're talking about." 

"If you're not going to tell me that can you at least answer me one thing F/n?" Mikasa asked. 

Where was all this coming from? "Why'd you leave?" 

"What?" 

"Those years ago, You left-disappeared. And we got nothing, no answers, Levi wouldn't tell, us anything he didn't even want us to say your name, he told my mom you left and wanted to leave. You didn't tell us anything. My mom cried and worried about you for two years. You were a sister to me, I want to know where you went. But we got nothing and now you're here, and-" Her voice started to crack. I never have known her to show any type of real emotions I mean not since my mom died. That was the only time. Not even when her dad left them. I didn't know how to react.

I didn't know how to answer her. I couldn't tell her the truth. I looked away, I could already feel myself getting choked up, "I'm sorry...It was just so much...with you guys...Levi...My mom...I didn't know-" 

I was expecting a punch or for her to yell at me telling me how selfish I was. That I could have done anything. What I wanted Levi to do. I wanted them to tell me how wrong I was. That I should have let him kill me that Samuel was right all those years that I was worthless. But instead, I felt Mikasa embrace me. 

"You should have just talked to someone, I would have listened." She told me. I could hear the sadness in her voice. I brought my hand up and hugged her back. Hurtting her and Kuchel was the last, thing I ever wanted to do. 

"I'm so sorry." Was all I could tell her. So I kept repeating it. 

I don't know how long we were in that dressing room. But after a while, Mikasa pulled away. 

"I'm just- I'm just happy you're back and things can go back to normal." She smiled at me. Mikasa really had a beautiful smile, "Sorry. I just had needed to get that off my chest, it's been on my mind all day." 

I nodded at her, I still didn't have the words to respond to her. I wiped my face, "It's fine, I'm sorry Mikasa that I stressed you out so much all-" 

She put her hand up stopping me from talking again, "Like I said it's okay." 

"I should go, and let you finish, Levi and Bella might be wondering why you're taking so long," She said shaking her head and walking out. 

I hung my head to myself once she was gone. 

Wh,at was wrong with me.

Hurting the ones I'm supposed to love. I never thought of all the pain I put Kuchel and Mikasa through, I had only thought about Levi. And I had figured he'd get over it. I mean He'd be angry, and as I think I'm learning he even hated me. I mean why wouldn't he I told him I cheated. But he moved on and I thought that would be the end of it, he was with Cira, it was all over the new, I figured he'd forgotten about me and I would live the rest of my short life with Samuel...that eventually he'd kill me. 

WIth all these things happeneing now maybe I have a chance at a new life, granted it can't be with Levi, he's already moved on and wants to get married to Cira, but maybe I could-No what am I thinking. I'm lucky if I don't die from these withdraws. 

I stepped out of the dressing room feeling exhousted I think I was done with shoping for today.

"Didn't like any of them?" Bella aksed once I was out. I smiled a shook my head. I didn't need anything else I already had some jeans and a shirt. "I'm not feeling all that great Maybe se should leave." 

"Done already?" Levi walked over to me. He had a bag in his own hand from another store. He left? I guess that was cool at least he didn't know I was in here crying.

"Are you alright?" 

"Can we go ahead and call it a day?" I asked him. I didn't want to be out anymore. I didn't want to be around people. in all honesty I didn't want to be around him anymore. I just wanted to be alone, and not have to face him Mikasa or Kucheal anymore, becasue the guitl of hoe fair I've suck is killing me.

Levi looked into my eyes like he was trying to read me. Or maybe it was something else. Like Levi wanted to tell me something else but couldn't find the words. In a perfect world, he tells me that he was still in love with me. I mean If I had things my way that's what he'd say. But instead this wasn't a perfect world instead of my way, the reality was my mom was dead for at least six years now, my dad was in jail for killing her, I was addicted to heroin and a former whore. 

I didn't belong here. 

I didn't belong with them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this chapter two in a half years to come out, the truth is I've been a sleepy and just couldn't get one out, but here it is! I have to go clock in my second job now. 
> 
> I really hope you all like this chapter and the little convo between reader and Mikasa. Expect more tears from Kuchel and read and Mikasa, so that's a thing.
> 
> Again you all are da best! I want to know what you guys think of the story now, how to do you think I'm developing reader and Levi's relationship? momma wants to know who thinks they know what will happen next? I want to know it all Lol
> 
> until the next chapter 
> 
> xoxo


	40. Chapter 40

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YIKES um...a new chapter Yay?!

Levi Pov

Since we left the last store, I've been keeping an eye on F/n. 

I don't mean to worry about her so much, but when she looks do drain and out of it, I can't help it. Maybe it was a bad idea to take her out here today. We were all walking back to the car. At least she got a few things. We'll come back for some more stuff another day. Or I might just go out alone. It was clear she was saying she didn't want or like some of the stuff because she didn't want to rely on me. I don't know why she has to act so stubborn. I only want to help her. 

Right now she was walking ahead with Bella, and they were talking, I wonder about what?

"Levi," I looked to my side Mikasa was walking beside me, "What's with her?" 

"What?" 

"Don't play dumb; I can tell everything isn't together, what's going on with F/n." 

I looked forward, "Nothing." I lied. I couldn't tell her the truth. F/n had begged me not too. And the last thing I want to do right now is betray her trust. She needs to realize I'm on her side, and I only want what's best for her. 

"Levi please, F/n is important to me too." Mikasa stopped me grabbing on to my arm, making me look at her. 

"I said nothing is wrong." 

Damn Mikasa for being so perceptive. But I can't tell her, cause then she'd tell mom, and who knows what they'd say to F/n. I doubt they would be angry or anything, but more sad and upset with themselves or me. We left her. We didn't try hard enough especially when she was in such a bad place in her life. We abandoned her. I abandoned her.

"Levi-" 

"Just drop it. If she wants to tell you, she will," I cut Mikasa off and started to catch up with Bella and F/n. 

Once I did, we were almost out of the mall. I'm glad we went so far out. It's less likely for people to recognize me. I hate it when they do. It makes things hard to get done when every five minutes someone is stopping you trying to get a picture. Although I am a little surprised, I haven't been stopped by anyone today, but I'm not complaining.

"Crazy no one's stopped you yet isn't Bro?" Bella asked looking at me as though she had just read my mind. F/n gazed at me too. 

"More like a relief if you ask me," I answered them. I looked back to Mikasa who looked lost in her own thoughts. I ignored her if I try to say something I might risk making a scene and I don't want that.

"Are you really that popular Levi?" F/n spoke up for the first time since she said she wanted to leave. "Are people constantly stopping you on the street?" 

"More or less it's annoying really," I told her.

"Oooh, this one time I was with them, it was so crazy Mikasa, and I had to just leave him," Bella told her. "Not to mention Cira was with us then too, so the crowd was insane." 

"Sounds overwhelming," F/n said.

She didn't have any idea. 

"OMG! Mom looks it's Levi!" I heard a loud voice shout, as though we just jinxed ourselves talking. 

Shit.

Your Pov

We were all on our way back, that was until some little girl recognized Levi, and from there it was hell. It was like she sounds an alarm because then. I just kept hearing people say Levi's name and walk up to him. They all wanted pictures or an autograph. They had all but pushed Mikasa, Bella and me out their way. It was just so much how could anyone deal with this? Let along Levi? The Levi I knew didn't like big crowds. He liked being left alone with his books. But here he was smiling with these strangers. Taking pictures; It was a total 180 from what I knew to be like...Being out here changed him. 

Again I saw how much of a different person he was. And it's fine; people change, I just wish I had changed for the better. 

"Come on he'll meet us in the car," Mikasa said grabbing my arm and pulling Bella and me out of the group that had surrounded us. 

"It was kinda fun being in all that," Bella laughed. I smiled, she's still such a child. 

"Who knows how long he'll be there," Mikasa said walking in fount of us. We both followed her back to the car. 

~~

I honestly didn't think it would be that long, but it was feeling like it was going on two hours. Again the reality was setting in Levi is very famous. I know I knew that but seeing it is something else. 

Mikasa and Bella were talking about something, but I couldn't really bring myself to focus on them. I was thinking about my whole situation. I know I promised Levi I'd try to have fun today or whatever, but since Mikasa come to me in the dressing room, I can't but feel guilty. I left them. And they changed. They all changed for the better, and I became this whore...

"Earth to F/n!" 

I looked up, and it was Bella, "Have you met Cira?" 

I shrugged," Yeah," 

"Really? Where did you meet her at?" Mikasa asked sounding interested.

"It was at his house, She came the day we came back, but she left," I told them,

"And she was cool with you there?" Mikasa asked. 

"Well, I don't think so, I didn't mean to intrude really but Levi-" 

"I bet she got super jelly," Bella cut me off saying. 

"No doubt, Cira is the worst I don't even know why he started dating her," Mikasa said under her breath.

"But F/n is here now, that has to mean something," Bella spoke up.

"Wait, I'm just visiting," I told them. They needed to know Levi, and I wasn't getting back together. No matter how much I did want it to happen. I knew it wouldn't We live different lives besides Cira and him are thinking about getting married. They love each other. "It isn't like that." 

Bella laughed, "You both always say it isn't like that-" 

"And yet it always it," Mikasa finished for her. 

"It just isn't like that," I insisted. 

"Well, it needs to get like it," Mikasa said leaning back into her seat crossing her arms. "Cause I'll be damned if Levi marries her." 

I sighed, "Just be happy for him, If he's in love...then that's good." 

Mikasa rolled her eyes at me, but she didn't say anything else.

We all were quiet for a moment. I really did hope Levi would hurry up already. I felt like I was getting antsier the more we waited for him. What if they start asking me more questions? I didn't want to tell them the truth. I couldn't they'd hate me if they found out what I had been up too. 

And just like Bella had been reading my mind, she started talking again, "So what else you been up to back at home?" 

I averted my eyes from her, "Nothing really...just going day by day..." 

"Come on you gotta be doing something fun? Any new guys in your life. I mean if you insist you're not with Levi. That means you have your own guy to go back to at home right?" 

"Afraid not," I told her, I still couldn't look her in the eye. Cause I did have someone back at home, it was Samuel, but I never once wanted to be with him. 

"Everything alright F/n?" I looked at the rearview mirror Mikasa was looking at me, Why couldn't they leave me alone about this?

"I'm fine." 

"You sure sweetie?" Bella asked, "You have been acting weird all day, almost like you want to say something but your not? I mean I get it, we haven't seen each other in like what has it been? Four? Five years? But you've just been so dull. Aren't you glad to see us?" 

I shook my head, "I'm more than happy to see you, both of you!" I told them. I didn't want them to think I didn't want to be with them. What was wrong with me? "I've missed you guys so much." 

"Then what is it?" Mikasa asked. 

I can't tell them the truth. 

"It's complicated." 

"It can't be that complicated," Belle started, "Just tell us what's up. Is it Cira? Are you really still in love with Levi? You can tell us." 

"No, it has nothing to do with Levi." 

"Then what is it?" Mikasa asked.

Just then the door opened, and Levi got in the driver's seat. 

"Sorry, I wasn't expecting that to happen out here." 

No one said anything. Levi looked between all of us, "You guys okay?" 

We all nodded our heads. He didn't press on it, but you could tell from the air that something was wrong. The ride back to Kuchel's house wasn't long. And I was thankful for that. It was still earlier in the day, but it felt like it the day was already over. 

"Hey, the two of you go in I gotta talk to F/n for a sec," Levi told Mikasa and Bella.

They didn't say anything; they just left out. But I couldn't help but feel nervous. What did Levi want to talk about?

Once they were gone Levi turned around in his seat and looked back at me. "Are you okay? Was today too much?" 

I mustered up a smile, "Everything is fine." 

He sighed, "I don't want you just saying that for my sake F/n. I need to know if you're really okay? I know I wanted you to have a good time today, but I want it to be genuine too."

"Everything is okay-" 

"Then why did you put back half the stuff we picked out for you?" 

"Cause I don't need-" 

"Just let me take care of you damn it." 

"I don't need you to do that!" I yelled. Levi looked taken back, but I don't know what to tell him. Why can't he see this is smothering me? 

"What do you want me to do then F/n? I can't leave you alone. If I do...I just can't," Levi asked. He was breaking my heart. I didn't know what I wanted from him. I just don't want to hurt him anymore.

"You should just let me go Levi." 

"I'm not doing that!" He yelled this time.

I didn't say anything. Neither did he.

"Do you want to go in and eat? My mom did cook; once we're done we can go back home, Are you up for it?" He changes the subject.

"Yeah, it's fine." I started to get out the car. "Can we just not be long, they're really suspicious, and I'm just not ready to tell them..." 

"Yeah," He answered. 

I really hope Levi isn't mad with me, but I feel like he has to realize I might just need space. I just need to figure things out on my own.

Levi Pov

I'm so lost when it comes to F/n, now.

She was the one person for so long I always felt like I had a good idea of, and now it's completely different. I get that people grow up and change and grow apart, but this whole situation is different. We wouldn't have grown apart if I had stayed if I had just thought about it for a moment. She wouldn't have had to go through the shit she's been through.

"Levi, you aren't touching your food?" 

I looked up and my mom who was pointing at my plate. I couldn't say I really had an appetite. This whole thing is just so draining. I don't know what to do. She wants me to leave her alone, but I can't do that. I can't let her go again, because what if I do and something worst happens? I shook my head, "I'm just tired." 

"Really?" My mom spoke up, "Why don't the two of you stay the night?" 

"No," I spoke up took quickly. They all looked at me. And I could see F/n begging me with her eyes not to make a scene, "It's just F/n, and I already had plans for the rest of the day," I lied.

My mom smiled at us, "Is that right? What plans are those?" 

"None of your business," I told her. They were so noisy.

F/n chuckled out loud, "Nothing too exciting, just hanging out." 

"And they say they aren't dating," Bella huffed out with a laugh.

"We're not," I told them. 

"He has a girlfriend," F/n added. 

"That he doesn't like that much," Mikasa told her.

My mother started to laugh we all looked to her."Well, doesn't this conversation sound familiar?" She asked us all.

I couldn't help but hold my head down smiling a little as I actually thought about it. It really did sound a little familiar. Back when we were younger, when everyone knew I was in love with F/n, and she was in love with me, but we didn't believe it. Only to find out we were both crazy about each other.

But it wasn't the same now, So much is different. 

I'll always love her; I'll never stop loving F/n. She's the love of my life. But I just don't have the right to love her like that anymore. When she needed me, I abandoned her and left her to live in hell. She didn't do anything wrong...It was me. 

I looked back up and F/n she was talking to them about something, but I really wasn't listening. Instead, I watched her. She was smiling. It was something she was doing a little bit more of today, I can still see the sadness behind it, but it's better than nothing. I noticed she was doing pretty good at deflecting their questions about herself for the most part. She just kept asking them what they had been up too. 

She can't do that forever though. How will she tell them the truth? My mother has to know. Maybe not right this moment, but she has the right to know what's going on what happened. I can't help but dread telling her. It's going to be a disaster.

"So if you're not dating Levi, are you with anyone back at home?" My mom asked her, "is there any marriage plans or someone special?" 

F/n face seemed to lose the little brightness it had. She looked away, "No." 

"Aww, come on, you're a beautiful young lady I'm sure you've had plenty of boys try and talk to you," My mother joked.

The irony of what she was saying didn't go unnoticed by me or F/n. I know this was making her uncomfortable. And by the way, her emotions swing these days I wouldn't be surprised if she didn't start crying. I sighed to myself. Why did it have to be this way? Why did I have to leave? Why did I have to go with Cira and try and forget about F/n? I shouldn't have left. And now for the rest of my life, I have to live with the fact that I didn't take care of the one person that meant the most to me. And now she's this shell of herself and it's all my fault.

"Levi are you sure you're alright? You seem so out of it?" My mom asked me again, this time placing her hand on mine.

I shook my head again, "I'm fine." I got up, F/n did mention she didn't want to stay long. And I think that the last question was a queue that it was time to leave.

"It's been fun, but we should go ahead and leave out," I looked at all of them and nodded and F/n. She nodded back and stood up. I watched her mover towards me, and something about it I couldn't figure out, but I just didn't like the way it sat with me...Like I was controlling what she did. It was like she was obeying me...

That's when something clicked.

Was I just as worst as Samuel? Since she's been here, I've only told her what to do...or at least what if that's what she thinks? I've been dragging her from place to place; I won't even let her leave the house...But still, I have a good reason for that. Who knows what would happen if I let her do whatever she wanted. She'd be back on that stuff in a heartbeat. I can't let that happen, so she has to be around me, at least until I know she won't relapse. But I have no idea how long that will take. And I won't put her in rehab. 

What the hell am I supposed to do?

"What are the two of you in a rush for?" My mom asked getting up after us. "We haven't seen F/n in years. You both just spend the night." 

"Tempting but no," I told her, putting my shoes on.

"F/n don't let Levi tell you what to do. Don't you want to stay?" She smiled at her. 

"I-I--I" F/n was studdering looking from me to my mother. Like she was trying to get an answer from me. Did she really need me to choose for her? Did she really seem me like Samuel? Like someone whole controlled her? But still I can't risk letting her stay, and she goes through another episode. I know she wouldn't want that. "I mean I'd love to stay, but I getting very tired." 

"I have a bed upstairs." 

F/n started to stutter again. 

I sighed, "Tell you what, we all plan a weekend out next week, and you'll see her then?" 

F/n smiled at my mom, "That does sound like a good Idea." 

My mom looked at F/n and me like she was trying to figure out if we were up to anything. It was a look I was a child again under her gaze, but she then looked away. "Fine, next weekend we all should go to the beach, or we can find a little fair. It will be fun. Like a little family." 

"That sounds like a great idea (Moms name)" F/n said hugging her. they hugged each other for a moment, and I could hear them talk to each. "Don't be a stranger, if you need anything F/n I'm here. Come to talk to me okay?" 

"I will," Was all F/n answered with. I really hope she knows she can talk to her. 

My mom looked at me and sighed. Well, I couldn't say I was expecting that reaction. But she hugged me, "You take care of F/n while the two of you are down here okay?" 

"Tsk, what do you think I've been doing?" 

My mother hit me over the head, making me roll my eyes she was being dramatic. "I love you, I'll see you next weekend. Tell belle and Mikasa I said bye." 

My mom nodded and looked at the two of us again, a smile never leaving her face, "You know if the two of you wanted to get back together I woundn't be mad." 

I sighed and too F/n's hand, "Good night mom," After that F/n and I walked to my car. I took a small glace at F/n she was smilng to herslef again and this one actually looked ginuen. 

I knew this time cause for a second I saw that spark that I loved that was in her eye when were were younger. I just wish I could see more of it.

Your Pov

Levi drove us back to his house. 

We didn't say anything to each other on the way back. I don't know if he might be mad at me or anything, or maybe he's in his own thoughts. I know I sure was in my own. 

But weven when we got back into the house he didn't say anythingt to me, so I just walked to the room he was letting me stay in. I sat down on the bed thinking abuot today. 

After like five years I saw Kuchel and Mikasa again...not to mention Bella. They were all doing so well...And they were as lively as ever. They were still a family...I know I wasn't but I couldn't help but feel like I was some what of an outsider. I hated this. I have to change this...I have to fix my life!

I don't know what to do from here. 

Should I be getting a job, I mean I know I want to...but still how do I even do that? And with his addcitions. I don't want to be a whore addicited to heroin, but this cold turkey thing feels like it's going to kill me. What would they do in a rehab? But would Levi even let me go to one? And if he did..Who knows? It would give him a reaon to go back to his old life. I could be out of his life again and he'd go back to his perfect hollywood life. 

He's done it before it can't be that hard to do it again. He even has a girl who wants to be his wife....I can't blieve I made him hate me that much. He hated me so much he was quick to run off with another girl, just to forget about me...Me must have really loved me...and to see me like this now. who knows what he really thinks? 

I honestly think the only reaons he's gone this far for me is becausehe feels guilty...because he promised my mom something stupid. 

Suddenly I head a knock at the door. 

It couldn't be anyone but Levi, "Come in," I told him. 

And it was he leaned against the door frame. I wonder what he wanted now...To tell me to feel better again?

"F/n-" it sounded like he was going to ask me something but decided aginst it, "Did you have any fun today?" 

I nodded, "Thank you Levi..." 

"I know it was a suprise but I thought you'd feel better if you saw someone else who cares abuot you." 

"It was nice to see them, really Levi it was." 

"He ran his figures through his hair, "That was the widest I've seen my mom smile in a while, so thank you." 

"Is she okay?" I asked afirad of the answer. What if there was something wrong with her?

"No, she's fine. We've all been. But I think we all missed you," 

"Not true, you guys are doing just fine without me...I was the one who need- nevermind..." I have to think before I speck, sometimes I think I'm jusr running my mouth and if I had just said what i was thinking I'd only make Levi feel more guilty.

Nether of us said anything to each other for a moment. I remember there was a time we could this but laied in each other arms...those days are long gone.

"You want anything?" Levi asked me.

You

"No," 

"It's only six o cloock, want to watch a movie and just eat junk food or something." Levi sighed

I smiled. Dispise everything going on between us, Levi is a good man...Sometimes just too good.

"I guess what would be nice." 

Before I knew it Levi walked futher into the room and laied down on the bes beside me and turned on the Tv.

"What are you doing?" 

"Turning on the tv," He said. "Why get up and go upstairs when this spot is perfect. We'll watch TV in here." 

I don't like the idea of being this close to Levi, but I don't hate it either. He may not belong to me anymore...but somee how with all this crazy stuff still going on and him being hear both clams me down and rails me up...and being close to him like this...I- I just don't know.

I just wish thing were different.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANKS FOR READING!
> 
> I AM SO SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT ON THIS CHAPTER!!!
> 
> I've had some crazy family thing happen and a writer's block and a million other things just go wrong. But here it is, and I really hope I can get this fic done in the next month, I will try harder to get chapters out better but I can't make any 100% promise. 
> 
> Anyways thank you all so much for being patient. You all are some of the best people on the internet and I love and appreciate every single one of you, I hope you all are doing okay, and have a great day ((it's 4am I go into or at 8am so I'm going to bed now))
> 
> Until the next chapter 
> 
> Xoxo


	41. Chapter 41

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay new chapter! 
> 
> Song reader is singing in this chapter is Apple juice by Jessie Reyez it's a very pretty song if you ask me.

Your Pov

I woke up yawning and feeling heavy. 

Most mornings I feel like this like my whole body was tired, God, I didn't want to get up either. I wish I could stay in bed like this forever. 

I started to move, but then I felt someone arms around me. Who? I made a glance behind me just to see Levi's sleeping face. I turned my head away from him just as fast. What the hell? What was going on? What did we do yesterday? We went shopping, I saw Mikasa, Kuchel, and Bella, we ate then we went home. Once we got home, I came in here. Oh, Levi and I sat in here for the rest of the day and watched movies. I guess we just fell asleep...

I was starting to calm down. Nothing happened. 

I sighed, this was nice though. Levi holding on to me. It brings me back. This was my favorite place in the world, right in his arms. Hell, it still is. I was made for Levi...But that was another time; it feels like a whole lifetime ago. I could almost laugh, it was so messed up, Levi doesn't want me now. Why would he? I broke his heart when I left, and he moved on. I'm just guilt he needs to free himself from. 

I needed to get up. I started to move from him. I figured he'd wake up Levi's always been a light sleeper, but here I was sitting up looking over him, and he was still out like a light. And he was well; he was beautiful.

I just stared at Levi's sleeping face, there was no frown, no expression from it at all, just him peacefully sleeping. I couldn't help but smile. He was Levi...I don't know something about this was just- it was just unbelievable...Since I've been back with him I don't think I've really taken a moment to think that Levi is back in my life. Or even more importantly he saved me. Levi saved me from Samuel...

I was still watching him sleep, but I could feel myself getting teary-eyed Levi saved my life...

I shook my head, Of course, he did. It was him after all. I walked away from the bed. I needed to shower. As I was looking for my stuff, I started to really think. Levi is doing a lot for me it bearly been a week and he's already done so much for him. I should do something for him. I have to show him I appreciate him somehow. But how? He took me from Samuel, brought me to L.A. gave me a bed and a place to call home.  
On top of that been with me through my withdraws...All while having his own life. He even took me out yesterday to shop. And what have I done so far? I've been a pain in his ass. 

I mean, I just can't get behind the fact that he wants to do everything for me, but still...I can be a little grateful for this much right? I don't want his money or anything, but I should have been at least trying to be happy...But there has to be something else that I can do? Since I've seen him I know I've been trying to push him away, and even now I don't want to be this close to Levi, because I know in the long run I'd just hurt the both of us...but still...

I'll figure something out for now, right?

Levi Pov

I woke up to the smell of something burning. 

Instantly I snapped up. Looking at my side F/n wasn't there. I could have sore I fell asleep next to her last night. This was her room. When did she get up? How did I not wake up? Why didn't she wake me up? Panic started to set in as I thought of more questions. Was she okay? Did she have another episode? Did she leave? Where was she? What was that burning smell coming from the kitchen? 

"F/n?" I called out, but I got no answer. 

Where did she go? 

But as I walked closer to the kitchen, I could hear music coming out from there. Cira? No, she would have told me if she was back. 

But then I heard some singing. "Gotta love me Don't let goodbyes come too easy Love me," That was definitely F/n. She will always have the most amazing voice to me, "just let me know that you need me Love me, I'll teach you how to love. " 

I sighed in relief when I saw she was moving around the kitchen. She was alright. 

She seemed to be in her own little world singing. She was cooking something, or I should say burning something. But more importantly, it was a sight to see. She didn't look like she had a care in the world. She was actually smiling and just singing. It was the F/n from five years ago in fount of me right now. She was wearing some shorts we bought yesterday and one of my shirts. She was adorable. 

She hadn't even noticed that I was leaning on the doorway watching her. I wish she wouldn't either, part of me is afraid she'd go back into that shell she's been since I've been back with her. But I guess she'd call me a creep or something if she turns around and just sees me staring at her. 

So I cleared my throat, "What are you burning?" 

F/n jumped at the sound of my voice and turned looking at me with her hand on her chest. "Damnit, Levi! You scared me!" 

I smiled back at her; She didn't look too upset about it. She had her own little smirk on her face when she said that. I walked further into the kitchen, "My bad, what are you in here doing." 

"I'm making breakfast." 

I looked over at the stove. She had some pancakes and eggs going. 

"Why are you burning it." 

"Tch, it is not burning." 

"Is too," I teased her. I poted at the pancake, "See that black around it? That means it's burning." 

F/n moved the eggs out the pan, then put her hands on her hips, "Do you want a half cooked pancake? Or do you want it to be done?" 

"I want it to be eatable." 

"Let's see you do a better job then." 

"Fine," I said. 

"Fine," She mimicked back childishly. 

Cute was all I could think of. 

~~

My pancakes came out perfect as usual. I wasn't anything special in the kitchen or anything, but I knew how not to burn food. F/n didn't seem like she was too impressed, no doubt upset mine didn't have any black on them. We ate mostly in silence. 

"You know the eggs are pretty good." 

"Shut up." 

I chuckled. I don't know what got into her this morning, but I do like it. She's F/n...

"Tsk, don't be too mad we all can't win everything." 

"Says Mr. Perfection," She mumbled. 

"I like to go by sexiest man alive." 

"Oh, shut up," She said throwing a napkin at me. 

"Oi, I've had plenty of screw-ups." 

F/n put down her fork, "Oh, really?" She leaned in dramatically, "Do tell." 

I rolled my eyes smiling, "None come to time." 

"As if!" She laughed, "Remember Levi before anyone knew you I did. You had plenty of screw-ups."

"No idea what you're talking about." 

"Oh yeah? Okay, who's idea was it to set the grass on fire that one-fourth of July? Or who almost burnt down his mom's house when I got that easy bake oven for Christmas? Or the time we were trying to make a volcano, and we didn't have any red dye and said hot sauce was a good substitute and all the fumes had our eyes burning for the rest of the night." 

I laughed at some of those memories, God, I hadn't thought about that shit in years. But still I shook my head, she had her stories all wrong, "You set it on fire, I only passed you the firework. Your mom had told you not to play with it when she wasn't home, I didn't tell you to bring it over, and it was your idea for the volcano, I just said it sound like it would make sense." 

F/n was laughing, "You got an excuse for everything." She leaned in and used her hand to mess with my hair, "Well, Mr. Perfection you have been head, so there. You're not perfect." 

"Doesn't change my sex appeal." 

F/n shook her head and me and went back to eating, "Fame has gotten to your head." 

We both went back to eating, the air wasn't heavy or anything. It honestly hadn't been like this since we been back together. "What do you want to do today?" 

She shrugged, "No clue, Anything you want really, not like I have anything planned." 

"Well, neither do I."

"Aren't you about to be working on a new movie or something." 

"That's going to be a minute before I start filming on that." 

"Do you know what it's about? Do you have a script? Do you need help with your lines? It can be like old times," she said with a small smile.

That would be nice, but I shook my head, "No, they're giving us the scripts as we film, Besides I don't want to do any work today. These are my lazy do whatever I want days." 

"Seems like that's all you do," She teased. "We explore your house some more I'm sure you have some secret dungeon here somewhere." 

"Sorry to disappoint." 

She chuckled, "Just kidding. I was actually thinking. I wanted to watch your show...I've never seen it. Actually, I never really seen anything you've been in." 

"Really?" I guess I shouldn't be surprised with the life she had these last few years. 

"Yeah," F/n trailed off a bit and her eyes glossed over a little, "Samuel would put them on...but it was only to make me angry...I never actually watched them...I'd just leave the room or something." 

"You don't have to talk about it," I told her. I didn't want her reliving anything she went through. Even though part of me wanted to know. I wanted to know all that she had to endure. I want to know just how bad it was, cause I know it was bad, but something tells me these few years for her were so much worst then what I already know. 

F/n nodded at me. She didn't say anything she just mustered up this smile at me, "I'll start to clean up." F/n got up and took our plates and started cleaning up everything. I just watched her getting lost in my own thoughts.

Is that what she did there with him? Just mustered up a smile and did what she was told? I remember what I was thinking yesterday. I realize she needs space, for most of her adult life she's most likely has been told what to do, but she needs to know she's free. She can do whatever she wants, but at the same time, I don't want her to leave. Not now. Cause if she doesn't know who knows what will happen. She might even be worst out here in L.A. when she was back home. I don't know what to do. I really don't

I watched her move around, F/n was brave though. I mean she had to be strong to go through that and still be here. What pushed her though? At times she seems so out of it and tired. And when I think about how she is when she's withdrawing, I can only wonder. 

"Can I asked you a question," I asked her.

F/n turned back to me once she put a plate in the dishwasher, "Yeah." 

"Look, don't be mad...but I want to know...how'd you survive? What kept you going?" 

F/n looked away from her again. She started putting more dishes into the dishwasher again, "Honestly you." 

Me? What did-" How?" 

She shrugged, "I don't know. The thought of you maybe? I don't know maybe I had a little hope you'd come for me or something." She paused, "It sounds a bit silly...But do you remember that ring you had um, got me?" 

I nodded. 

There was this small smile on her face, "I'd had it for a while, in the beginning. I'd just hold on to it at night...And prayed that you'd come back for me. It really kept me going." 

"Do you still have it?" 

She shook her head, "After about a year had passed Samuel had found it and pawned it." 

"F/n-" 

"It's alright Levi," She stopped me before I could say anything. "It's okay; I'm grateful for you now. That first year was the hardest. But the thought of you kept me going. And in the end, you did save me, Levi...If anyone was going to do it, it would have been you, and you did. I can never be grateful enough for what you did." 

Did she see she wouldn't have had to go through that if it wasn't for me? If I had just tried harder. If I had found her when she first went missing. If I had made the police look harder for her. If I hadn't left her at that party. If I had never agreed to go to the party if we had just stayed home. If I had never came out here to L.A. Most of if not all her problems in life could have been avoided if I had just stayed there with her. 

"I'm sorry." 

I heard her sigh deeply, "You don't have to be sorry for anything Levi." 

I didn't say anything; I didn't know what to say.

"Levi," She spoke up. F/n walked back against counter across from me and took my hand. This was like the first time she had really willing touched me since we've been back together, "I want to move on." 

"I-" 

"Let me talk," She cut me off, "I want to move on from all that shit. And you've given me that chance...I- I can't tell you what else I want. But more then anything I want to be a better person. And it's because of you...Thank you. And don't feel guilty about what happened it wasn't your fault. I have never blamed you." 

Is this why she's been like this all morning? She just wants to move on? I closed my hands around hers. "I'm here for you. You've always been important to me F/n; nothing will ever change that. And I want to help, will you let me help you through this?" 

F/n took a moment, but she nodded in the end, "Within reason, Yes." 

I just nodded back at her. She let go of my hands, and I did the same. She went back to cleaning. I think we both realize there's more we should be talking about. But for now, this was enough. I think for the first time were on the same page. 

I think things will slowly get better. 

Your Pov

Today has been alright. 

That talk we had this morning wasn't that bad. I had really meant what I told him. I want to move on. I'm in a whole nother state now, I don't have to be afraid, and Levi is here with me. I can move on. I want too. I know I can. I have too. If I don't want to be a burden on Levi and show him how grateful I am to him, I have to move on with my life. I have to learn to be my own person.

Levi and I are in his mini theater watching his TV show. 

I had really wanted to see it; I always wanted to see it. But before it just wasn't a good time.

Now is a much better time, and honestly, it's not that bad. The plot is pretty different. I looked over at Levi, he was reading a book, and I watched his show. He said. He already played in it why would he want to watch it. But now and then he'll tell me something about what was going on behind the scenes during a part of the show. It was fun. 

A new episode was about to come on; I think it's the last one for the first season. I kicked Levi with my foot, "You character is an asshole." Because he was. He had been playing Cira's character the whole season. I might not care for Cira that much, but he didn't have to do her like this in the show. It was beyond mean!

"Tsk, he's everyone's favorite."

"Cause their suck-ups." 

He looked at me and rolled his eyes, "He'll grow on you." 

"Yeah right," But thinking of Cira I wanted to ask Levi about her, "So when is Cira coming back." 

"Don't know, she's been something with fashion week or something." 

"Why did you go?" 

"I don't like that Kind of stuff. Too many people." 

"You didn't seem to mind it yesterday at the mall," I told him. "You were all smiled. It was strange...I had never seen you like that with that many people." 

Levi looked back at me, "It's just part of the job, The worst part if you ask me. Cira lives for the attention, I just like the acting part only when it comes to being on the camera." 

I smiled, that does seem like a Levi thing. Maybe he hasn't changed that much. "Well, you seemed to be really good at the attention part. The people love you." 

"I guess they do." 

"What about Cira?" I asked without thinking. I groaned at myself. Why did I ask that? I shouldn't be asking him anything about his personal life like that. And Of course, she does! They're thinking about getting married.

"What about her?" He asked me.

I needed a save, "I mean, I noticed Mikasa and your mom didn't seem to be so thrilled about her whenever her name was brought up. What that deal?" 

Levi didn't answer for a moment like he was thinking about the answer himself. 

"What did she do som-" I tried to give him an answer, but he cut me off.

"It's cause she's not you." 

I chocked on my own saliva and started to cough. 

"Tch, so dramatic," He rolled his eyes.

I made myself laugh it off, "What? No, we've...I haven't been in the equation in years. There has to be another reason." 

"If you can come up with another reason let me know." He picked his book back up and started reading. 

I was speechless. 

I mean they might want us to get back together, but it's not like it would happen. Levi loves CIra. I'm just an old Ex girlfriend. We don't have a thing anymore. No matter how much I want it. That chapter in our lives has closed its door...But when he says stuff like I'll always be important to him, I just feel like I'm falling for him all over again-No! I can't. I'm not here to fall for Levi! That chapter in our lives is over! He's going to get married. It would only hurt me. He doesn't want the addict whore plain and simple.

I do wish things were different, but they are not, and will never be. I should be happy that were like this. 

~~

I didn't realize I fell asleep, but I felt my body being carried into a room and laid down on the bed. I know I shouldn't, but I really do love being in Levi's arms. So I didn't say anything. 

"You suck at pretending to be asleep," Levi told me laying me down. 

I opened my eyes back at him, "I didn't want to walk." 

"Such a pain." 

I yawned, "What time is it?" 

"Late," He said sitting at the foot of the bed. 

I kicked him, "I had a good day today." 

"Me too," Levi got up and yawned himself. It must have been pretty late. I wonder if he's going to sleep in here again.

Levi kneeled in front of me, "And things are going to keep getting better and better okay?" 

"Okay." 

Levi stood up, and before I knew it, he kissed me on my forehead, "I'll see you in the morning. If you need anything, I'll be down the hall." He started to walk out. But I call after him. Levi turned to me.

"What are we, Levi?" I asked him, but I didn't dare face him I didn't want to see what expression would cross his face, disgust maybe? It took him a while to answer though, like he had to think about it himself.

"We're still best friends." 

Then I heard my door close.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading!!
> 
> So this was nice a fluffy I think it was something we all needed, and who knows the next chapter might be fluffy to; no promises though!
> 
> *fun facts the bit about the hot sauce and the volcano is an actual life story from yours truly I was a very dumb 12-year-old who had way too much time XD
> 
> Anyways thanks a bunch for reading! Pretty please leave a comment anything is welcomed! 
> 
> Till next chapter 
> 
> xoxo


	42. Chapter 42

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is long over due

Levi Pov

Today went well.

I wasn't about to jump for joy or anything, but I can say that if every day from now on can go as it did today everything is going to be alright. 

My mind was replaying F/n's last question to me. 'What are we?'

I huffed to myself what are we? Why would she ask something like that? What does she want us to be? What does she want me to be to her? She's been pushing away my help all this time...Was she asking because she thinks I want something from her? No, F/n isn't so small minded; plus she knows I would never use her. But why would she ask me that? Maybe I'm over thinking it. If I had things my way she'd be mine again that way I could just hold her in my arms. That way I know she'd be safe and nothing else would hurt her again. 

But that's in a perfect world. 

The world we live in now is the one where I have a girlfriend, and she's recovering from the horrors she's had to live for the last five years of her life. That I have no doubt she blames me for. She might not think it, but I know it has to be somewhere in the back of her mind that it's my fault. If I feel it then I know it's had to cross her mind at least once. 

I sighed, adjusting my laptop's screen so I could see better. It was about three in the morning, but I couldn't sleep. I haven't been able to sleep since F/n's been out where with me. Anything can happen while she's sleep; I just want to be ready. I was currently looking up things to do to help her with her withdraws. I still won't put her in rehab, but that doesn't mean I can't figure out something else to do to help. I just hope it won't last long. 

This first week has had to be worst of it, but I know when it's out of her system she'll be doing a lot better. It's just a matter of time. Maybe after that, she'll want to tell my mom and Mikasa about everything. Hopefully. But I don't know how'll they'll take it. If it's anything like I think it will be they'll blame themselves, but it's not their fault. This is all mine. I shouldn't have left. I should have known something was wrong with the way she left. I should have followed her. If I had really loved her like I said I did I wouldn't have let her go the way she did. I should have demanded an answer from her, I know she would have told me the truth then we could have dealt with Samuel then. Then we wouldn't be going through this shit now. This is on me. Everything That happened to F/n is on me. 

The more I think about it the more I can't stand myself. The more I have to search how to help her the more I hate myself. I'm-

Just then my phone started to ring. Who the hell is calling me at this time? 

I looked at it and saw it was Furlan. Shit. I haven't talked to him since he left me and F/n that night back home. I've been so caught up with everything here I didn't even think to update him.

"Hey," I answered.

"Hey, man whats' been going on? I just got off the phone with Bella she told me you had F/n out there?" 

Shit. I didn't even think about him talking to Bella. Furlan's the only one besides me who knows she was doing down there, I hope he didn't say anything to her about it. If F/n knew they knew I don't know how she'll react. "You didn't tell her anything about what she was doing when we found her did you?" I asked him.

"No, I mean Bella did mention something was off about her, but she didn't say anything so I figured you didn't give any details so I didn't. I just said she was in a bad place when we found her."

"Shit," I rubbed my forehead, "Listen, I don't want her to find anything out about what F/n was doing." 

"Okay...But does your mom know?"

"No, none of them need to know right now." 

"Levi, why are you hiding what she was doing from them?" Furlan asked.

"Listen, It complicated." F/n didn't want anyone to know, and I've already lied to her and said I didn't tell Cira, I'm trying not to do that again. 

"It can't be that complicated, Levi. They have the right to know. F/n put you guys through hell. They have the right to know what she chose over you guys. I'm not saying I hate or anything but what she did wasn't right, she doesn't get to hid it know that we've found-"

"It wasn't like that." I cut him off saying. Furlan was thinking like I was when I first found out what she was doing. But this wasn't her fault. She only did what she thought she had to do to protect us. "She had her reasons for doing what she did. That's all you need to know." 

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" I could him getting fustrated in his voice, "Levi I can get if you still have feelings for her, but that doesn't mean you have to protect her did you forget what she put you-" 

"I said it's fine-" 

"No, it isn't- Bella said you brought her to your house? Levi, I don't think you're thinking about this clearly. We need to take a step back an-" 

"It's not like that Furlan." I cut him off again. I sighed, I might just have to tell him what happened. Who knows it might be good to get this off my chest to someone who cares. Not to say Cira doesn't care, but I could already tell her and F/n won't be friends anytime soon, so it's not like she's going to do anything. "Listen, Furlan, after you left I talked with F/n for a bit and I found some shit out," I went on to tell him about everything that happened after he left up until today.

Once I was done Furlan didn't say anything for a moment like he was thinking.

Finally, he spoke, "Shit that's fucked." 

"Tch, you're telling me. But you can't tell this to Bella alright." 

"That's fine, but Levi." 

That's what I didn't want to hear? "But what?" 

"You have to at least tell your mom." 

"I'm not-" 

"She has the right know," He told me.

"It's not that easy-" 

"And not to mention, you can't take care of her alone. If you're not going to tell your mom you need to put her in rehab. You can't just keep her in the house." 

"I'm not just keeping her in the house. I have this under control." 

"Bullshit, you think you do, but I know you when it comes to F/n you not thinking straight. You can't do this alone." 

"I've been doing fine so far," I told him. I was getting annoyed going back and forth with him. I have this under control. I don't need him telling me what to do. It's bearly been a week and she's already doing better.

"What happened when you have to go out for something? And the press sees her? Then what how do you cover that up? What if she gets with the wrong people down there? You need a support system with her to help both of you out and you know I'm right Levi." 

"It's fine," I told him. Deffently upset now. I know what Furlan is saying is right. I want to tell my mom, but I can't not only because F/n begged me not to. but knowing what that would do to her if she knew what F/n had to go through. I'm not trying to break my moms' heart like that. "I'll tell her, it's just not the right time." 

"And when will be the right time?" 

I was about to answer him but then I suddenly heard a loud thump from outside my room. F/n. Was my first thought. Shit. I've should have been checking on her. "Furlan I have to go." 

"Is it F/n is she alright?"

"I'm about to check on her, I'll talk to you later." I was about to hang up but then I remembered. "And don't tell, anyone about what I told you." I didn't say anything else and throw my phone down on my bed. I walked out of my room and walked down to F/n's room only to find her laying on the floor a few feet from her door. I ran to her.

"F/n? What happened?" I started to pick her up only to realize she was burning up, the whole shirt was drenched in sweat. How long had she been like this? She was half passed out. What the fuck, why would she wait so long to come to get me? 

"Levi...I didn't- I didn't," 

"Shush." I picked her up. I don't know how long she's had this fever but I need to get it down. I held her close to my chest and went to my bathroom. The closest one was a stand-up shower. I shook my head, I didn't even care. I got in the shower and turned on the cold water pouring it over the both of us. I needed to get her cooler and I didn't care how I took off her shit and let the cold water pour over her. I took a washcloth that was sitting on the side of the tub it was for decoration and started to rub it over her head. 

F/n wined a little but she looked like she wasn't in as much pain as the cold water ran over her. I was sitting down behind her. I didn't care about my clothes or anything. I just want her to get better. It will all be worth it when she is. 

I don't know how long we sat like this, but after a while, the water was only numb to me, to her I bet this might be the best rest she's gotten all night. I could see she was still uncomfortable but she didn't seem like she was as hot as she was.

"I'm sorry Levi," She said in a hushed voice.

"Shush," I didn't want her using any more energy then she had too.

"I really am though." She started to cry. 

I held on to her tighter. "It's fine." 

That didn't stop her from crying, it seemed to edge her on. I just kept hold of her using one hand to hold on to her and the other to run the towel over her. "It will be okay," was the only thing I could tell her.

"Just don't leave me, Levi," 

I sighed, kissing her forehead, "Never." 

Your Pov

I woke up feeling wet and soggy and tried. I'm not sure if I ever went to sleep. 

But opening my eyes and trying to adjust where I was I saw the shower faucet running over me. What the? I moved only to feel the strong arms around me? I panicked but then I remembered Levi. I looked back at him. He was sleep. 

"Levi?" I called out to him making him jump awake.

He seemed to be adjusting his own eyes for a moment. "Are you alright F/n?" 

I felt out of breath and tried but I didn't leave that stop me. I turned off the shower, "Am I okay? Levi you didn't have to get in here with me. You're going to get sick." Why would he do this? I looked like he was freezing! All because of me. I have to get him out of here but my whole body is aching. I don't care this is my fault. I have to.

"I'm fine," Levi said but before I could protest Levi put his hand on my face making me look him in the eyes, "Are you okay? You scared me last night." 

I moved my hand over his never breaking out eye contact, "I'm fine Levi, Thank you, but you need to get out of those clothes." 

Levi sighed and before I knew it. Levi grabbed me in his arms and pulled me closer in a hug. Suddenly I was all too aware of my lack of shirt. Thank God I had a bra on but still, this was awkward. I was going to say something but Levi spoke before I could.

"I know you want to move on, but you need to know I am so sorry. I could have stopped all this, but I didn't. And now you're suffering. You've been through so much and you don't deserve it. I'm sorry, Forgive me F/n please forgive me." He begged me holding to me tighter. 

I know he's saying sorry, but I can't help but feel like the guilty one. I've never blamed him. And to hear him blaming himself. I just...It hurts. I held him back in my arms. I couldn't keep the tears out, "Levi I have never blamed you, You have to know that. It was my choice. " 

Levi didn't say anything I could only feel him hold me tighter. 

I hate doing this too him. Me being here was a constant reminder of all this painful shit in his life, and it made him blame himself. I can't let him do this to himself. Seeing Levi so down like this is something I've never wanted to see. I've only wanted the best for him, and here I am causing him the most pain. But how do I stopped it? I'll keep getting this withdraws until it's out of my system, but who knows how long this is going to be? Why can't he just let me go? 

~.~.~.

I don't know how long we had stayed like that. but eventually, I got out to get dressed. Well to put on more pajamas. I've been in bed all day. I've been so tired. I can bearly stand long enough to do anything. I haven't really spoken to Levi today. He's checked on me a few times worried, I might fall out again. 

I hate worrying him. But that's all I can do for him now. 

I started to feel myself get teary-eyed again, yesterday was so good though. I thought we were moving on, but I feel like I just took 100 steps back. I hate this. I hate myself. I wish I was strong enough, that my body wouldn't betray my mind. I want to be better.

Just then I heard another knock on my door, and Levi walked in. I didn't get up and look up at him this time I just didn't have the energy to. 

"You need anything?" He asked in a monotone. 

"No, I'm good." 

"F/n you haven't eaten anything today." 

"I'm not hungry." 

"Can you try?" 

"Levi, I just don't have the energy." 

He didn't say anything, and I didn't hear the door close either. 

"Levi?" 

But before I knew it Levi was in front of me kneeling down touching my forehead. "F/n you're Freezing." 

"I'm fine." 

"Bullshit." 

My body betrayed me by shivering. I was already wrapped in the covers, I'll be fine. I didn't want to say anything. I want to stop worrying him. I can get through this on my own. 

Levi had other plans though, and after a moment I felt a dip in the bed. I was about to flip over to see what he was doing but Levi started to spoon me from the back. "Levi you can't-" 

"Shush," He said in a harsh tone. It almost sounded like he was angry. 

So I didn't say anything, I didn't want to upset him anymore. 

It was a moment, maybe even an hour, but he finally spoke, "F/n?" 

"Yes?" 

Levi sighed, "You have to tell me things." 

"What-" 

"You have to talk to me when you're not feeling well, I need to know so I can help you." 

"Levi I can-" 

"What take care of yourself? Yeah, cause you're doing a great job of that already." He snapped. Levi sighed again. "I'm sorry. It's just frustrating." 

"I'm sorr-" 

"Stop apologizing."

"So-" I cut myself off that time.

I could feel Levi's face in the back of my neck. His body head radiating off him making me warmer. "Relay on me. F/n I want to help you. Let me help you. You have to be honest with me." 

"I want to Levi, I do, but I can't keep hurting you," I told him honestly. 

"You're not hurting me." 

I know he's lying, I can feel myself starting to cry, this was the worst. Just like Levi said this was frustrating. All these feeling all these things that are wrong with us now. I hate it all. If only we were eighteen again. "I just wish things could go back to how they used to be before I fucked everything up." 

"I know, but we will be alright." He rubbed his thumb over my hand, "We'll figure this out. It will get better." 

Levifelt me crying and held me closer. He didn't say anything except for that it would be okay. And all I could do was hope he was right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!! It really means a lot <3 
> 
> so after like two mouths a depression episode, kh3, having to deal with an actual stalker and working every day I have finally finished a new chapter! 
> 
> I am so sorry it took so long for me to update I've been wanting too for the longest but life just kept happening but hopefully, things have slowed down a bit for me to finish this story because I really want to 
> 
> I hope you liked this chapter, if the odds are in my favor I'll have another chapter up around Wednesday morning, if not hopefully sooner rather then later. We'll all just have to see. 
> 
> Again thank you all for reading you're all the real MVPs out there 
> 
> xoxo


	43. Chapter 43

Your Pov

I woke up feeling refreshed. 

I sighed about time, the last two days have been the worst. but finally, I was feeling much better. I looked to my side and saw Levi wasn't there anymore; well I can't blame him, he couldn't just stay in bed with me. He still has a whole life to live. He can't just stay lade up in bed with me...no matter how nice it felt to in his arms. I shook my head to myself again. I can't think about him that way I don't have the right. He's in love with someone else and besides why would he want me? I'm a whore...I know somewhere in his mind he might not say it but he knows I've been around so why would he want me? 

I sat up and rubbed my face. These last two days just felt like a major step back from the other day. 

I have to still try, I can't give up on myself. Not when Levi has been trying to help me. I got out of bed. I need to shower, I went ahead and started to get my things, I walked out of my room. I didn't hear anything. I wonder if Levi went to sleep in his own room. I looked at his door, it was closed. I wonder if he's even home? He has been sitting on the has since I've been here. I think it's been a week since I've been here too. Shit, all I've done since I've been here is cry and have withdraws. I thought I'd be done with this by now. 

Just as I was about to walk in the bathroom, but then Levi's door opened and he walked out. 

"Oh, F/n?" 

"Hey," I looked over him he was dressed up like he was going out. 

"I was just coming to check up on you, how are you feeling?" 

I gave him a little smile, "A lot better actually." 

He looked over me like he was trying to see if I was telling the truth, "Good." he finally said after a moment.

Neither one of us said anything. It was a little weird to be under his gaze. "Er, were you about to go out?" I asked him.

"Something came up and I have to go out, I was actually coming to check on you, um, well since you're feeling better do you want to come with me? Or I can take you to my moms, Mikasa is in school right now, but I'm sure I can find something you can do while I'm gone," It was cute he was rambling. I'm not sure what he's nervous about it was nice to see him not so serious.

"Err, I wouldn't mind going with you," I cut him off, "that is if you don't mind." 

Levi nodded, "Yeah, okay, and it would be good to get out the house too." 

I nodded, "Just let me take a shower." 

"It's no rush." 

"Okay," I told him I was about to walk into the bathroom but he called my name again I looked at him.

"Are you sure you feel better? It's okay if you don't you can stay home, I won't be mad-" 

"Levi I'm fine." 

I gave him another reassuring smile, "I'll be ready in a few minutes okay Levi." 

I closed the door and took a deep breath, this was another chance to have a good day. These last two days may have been shit, but that doesn't mean I let them get me down. I'm going to get better, if not for me then for Levi. I can do this.

Levi Pov

I looked over at F/n who was in the passenger seat. she seemed to be in her own thoughts. I wonder what exactly. I'm a little surprised she wanted to leave out with me. I had thought she'd want to stay in but she wanted to leave out. can't say I blame her; since she's been here she's only been in the house beside that one day when we saw my mom, and besides that, she's been having withdraws. I'm sure she wanted fresh air. 

I think she's trying again. I mean it's not like she was not trying. It's not her fault she's having withdraws. But I think the worst of it is over. I was reading the first week is the worst. Not to say it will go away but they shouldn't hit her as hard anymore. At least I hope that's the case. I wished it would we could go back to the other day again though. I should have known it was too good to last but still. 

I looked back over at her. I wanted to say something to her I just don't know what to say; then again that was always a thing about F/n. We didn't have to talk 

I still can't help but feel like this is all my fault. When I look at her, all I can think about is all she's had too go through, and all the shit she has to get through now. I could have stopped this, this wouldn't have been her life if I had just tried. If I had just talked to her. If I hadn't moved out here. 

"So where are we going?" F/n spoke up taking me out of my thoughts. 

"Oh, It's just this photoshoot, my agent booked it real last minute." 

"Sounds exciting, can't say I've ever been to one before." 

"They're not all that." 

A few more minutes passed neither one of us saying anything. I don't know why but this was so...annoying. I looked back over at her. I wanted to say something to her I just don't know what to say; I'm not good at small talk I've never been. Then again I guess she already knows that. That was the thing about F/n. We could have quite moments like this without saying anything to each other for hours, and everything would be fine. Or even if she was, she was fine with rambling about something for hours and I'd just listened. She wouldn't get upset. She still knew I cared. she could feel it in my actions. I can't do the same thing with Cira, she'll get angry if I don't talk or answer. She just doesn't get me the same way F/n did. She always knew how I felt. Well, not always. I chuckled to myself.

"What's so funny?" F/n turned to me.

"I was just thinking how dense you can be." 

"Huh?" 

"It took you forever to figure out I liked you." 

"Um, excuse me, I wasn't the only one. It took you even longer," She said with a smile on her face.

"Tsk, not really I already knew you liked me. I was just waiting on you to get the hint." 

"As if!" She laughed out loud.

"I even kissed you and you still didn't get the hint." 

F/n sat there with her mouth open for a moment, "Yeah, but that was different." 

"Tsk, How so?" 

She didn't say anything.

I laughed a little, " As I thought. but you did eventually get it, the happiest day of my life." I said not thinking. 

She didn't say anything. I looked back her she stared out the window. Why would I say something like that? Making her think of our old relationship, what we could have been.

"Yeah, those were good times," She said in a low voice. 

Shit, what do I say to her now? I've never been good at this. 

I sighed and took her hand and bought it to my lips giving them a light kiss, "They were, and I wouldn't those memories up for anything." I told her. 

I looked back to the road, but not before seeing her smile a little, and it made my heart sore. F/n is beautiful. Nothing has changed about her. I still love her. I'll always love her. And I don't want her feeling bad about what happened to us. I understand her reasons for what she did. She was perfect. 

We were getting closed to the building the studio was in. 

"By the way when we get here, there might be some press around. If anyone asked just tell them you're my social media person or something," I told her trying to get her mentally prepared before we go in.

"Do you think that will work? Levi? I didn't think of it till now, but if it's going to cause you any trouble I'll stay in the car-" 

"It's fine." I looked back at her, "There won't even be that many maybe two or three, Plus there really here to see me." 

"F/n chuckled, "Okay, Mr. Ego." 

I just rolled my eyes at her. "And it shouldn't take that long I think he said it was a three-hour session." 

"Sounds fun," 

"Seriously it isn't. the places are always cold as shit, and you got a ton of people running around. It gets pretty crazy but I'd take a photo shoot before an interview any day." 

"Well, you have me here with you today, so who knows? It might be a good day." She smiled. 

Well, she was right about that. Any day with her was a good day.

Your Pov

Levi was right, it was crazy in here.

There were so many people running around. Everyone seemed to be in their own world. It was strange I've never seen anything like this before, and this was Levi's whole life now. I watched the way he was interacting with everyone, and it was just so different. This wasn't the Levi I knew. This was a whole new person. Smiling and shaking hands with everyone. At the moment I was sitting to myself watching the whole shoot from the side out of the way. 

I was also trying my best not to stare at Levi who was shirtless taking pictures. 

I couldn't help but get a little annoyed. How can one person look so hot? And even after all these years? He's still got the body of a Greek God. I know I have no right to be thinking of him this way but damn. He's beautiful. And after what he said in the car...And seeing him act so nice was just something else too. Even if that's nothing like the real Levi I know him to be. But then again time has passed I can't help but wonder if he likes this. All the smiles and stuff, I bet he doesn't, but then again why would he do it if he didn't. For as long as I've known him Levi isn't the type of guy to do stuff he doesn't like, so I guess some part of him likes it. Or it could be the same case with me, where it's just something he feels he needs to do at this point. 

I sighed. I'm making myself depressed again. Happy thoughts F/n. Today is supposed to be another good day. I can do this. 

"Excuse me, you're with Levi Ackerman right?" 

I looked to my left a tall woman in glasses was talking to me. 

I nodded, Er, yea I guess." 

She nodded vigorously, "I can't say I've met you before, I saw you come in with him, what are you to him?" 

"Oh," I remembered what Levi told me to tell anyone who asked, "Oh, I'm just his social media umm director," I said trying to sound sure of myself. 

She looked me down, "Levi doesn't have any social media." 

Geez, what was with this lady? "Well, I don't know what to tell you, cause that's what I'm where for?" 

"Hmm, interesting. But aren't you the same girl he was spotted with the other day when he was shopping? Quite strange for you to be going out on a family outing like that don't you think? You're not related to him, he only has one sister, and Cira is an only child so I know you're not related to her, the big question is who are you?" 

God, this lady did her homework. What did she want from me? "Hey, I've told you my job." 

"And I told you Levi doesn't have any social media he's notorious for that-" 

"Oi, didn't she already tell you what she was here for? Why don't you get lost now?" 

Levi popped up on the side of me. The lady looked at both of us, "Excuse me." Then she walked away.

I looked back at Levi, "Who was that?" 

"Tabloid person." 

"Oh," I hadn't expected for one of them to grill me with questions. That was weird for sure. 

"Yeah, sorry about that." 

"It's fine, she was just a little unexpected. Don't worry though I didn't tell her anything." 

Levi sat down in the chair beside me, "Doesn't matter they'll make a story out of nothing." 

"You're not worried about it?" 

"You get used to it. It's not like what they'll say is true." 

I just looked at him and nodded. I guess he would know. I just hope I don't cause him any trouble. This is still a whole new world for me. But if Levi says he'll be okay, I should just trust him.

"We got an hour left," Levi told me. "Then once we leave here we can go get something to eat I'm starving. You got anything in mind you wanna eat." 

I thought about it for a moment, "Actually I could go for some-" Before I could finish talking we both heard a crash and a loud scream.

We both got up to see what it was only to see a girl holding her arm. I think she broke it. Ouch. The whole room seemed to go into a panic. Levi, on the other hand, sat back down and took out his phone, like he couldn't be bothered with the whole thing. So I guess he's still a bit of an asshole. I sighed typical Levi. 

I was still watching the whole thing work out, after a while, the ambulance came in and got the girl. Once that was over I thought things would die down but everyone seemed to still running around. Then I noticed the photographer walked up to Levi. 

"Mr. Ackermen. I wanted to come to talk to you personally, but as you know the girl that just broke her arm Lisa was in the next part of the session with you, and the company wanted some photos of you with a girl, and we can't-" 

"Tch, you wanna get to the point," Levi asked rudely. So know he shows he's true colors.

"We have to rehearsal the last hour. We can't find anyone one to step in." The man kept talking to him, and I started to think to myself. I wonder if things like this happen a lot? One minute everything is fine the next everything is up in smoke. I guess living this life you have to be ready for anything. Levi has always been a quick thinker. I remember once my mom said he should be a lawyer. I guess the two go hand and hand. 

"You can do it!" 

Suddenly I was dragged out of my thoughts and the photographer was standing in front of me. "Huh?" I asked dumbly. I totally zoned out for a minute there. 

"You can take her place you're perfect!" He said to me.

"Take who's place?" 

"Lisa's! You can step in with the shoot. You can save the day!" 

I laughed out loud, "No, Yeah I don't think so." I shook my head this guy was out of his mind. I looked at Levi he had this stupid smirk on his face. Did he put him up to this? I looked back at the man who still had hope in his eyes, "I'm sorry Mr?" 

"Zolf." 

"RIght Mr. Zolf. Thank you but no thank you, I'm not model. I wouldn't know what I was doing I'd just get in the way." 

"We can work around that all we need you to do is stand there and look pretty, the camera does all the other work." 

I tried to smile him off "Not really my thing-" 

"But please Ms, you're our only hope. You don't know how much we'd be in your debt. Not to mention we'll pay you." 

I turned my head, Pay? "I'll get paid?" 

He shook his head, "Handsomely," 

Now that I think about it. I do a job. I don't want to keep living off Levi, and it would be nice to have my own money. Even just a little. I sighed. "Sure." I guess a few pictures won't hurt.

The photographer nearly jumped in the air, "Okay I'm going to send over the makeup team you sit tight." Then he ran off. 

I looked at Levi. "Did you do this?

He shook his head laughing, "No, he was talking then he looked over at you and it was like he saw an angel." 

"I'm glad you find this funny." 

"I didn't think you'd say yes." 

"I can't believe I said yes," I rolled my eyes. Then I frowned, "Why do these things always happen with you?"

"What do you mean?" 

"This is just like heathers, I'm always helping you out with this type of shit. I never saw you helping out in a dance routine." 

Levi was about to say something but was cut off "Ms, would you come with us?" A guy came up to me and asked I sighed, "Sure." 

Levi Pov

I watched as they were putting the last few touches of makeups on F/n. 

This was quite the sight to behold. F/n about to be in a photo shoot with me. Who would have thought? I really didn't think she'd agree to it, but here she was. welling and ready. it was almost like Heathers all over again. She had a nag for saving my ass at times like these. And I'm grateful. If it wasn't for her I'd have to come out here and do all this over again, and that would be a drag. 

F/n walked up to me in a robe, her hair and makeup done. I smiled, "You look beautiful." 

"Shut up," She said not looking at me. 

I couldn't help but smile, this was F/n I knew. 

"Okay we don't have a lot of time lift, F/n lose the robe," Zolf said.

F/n snapped her head at him, "Excuse me?" 

"I need you to take the robe off." 

"Why?" She asked.

"It's a topless shoot F/n," I told her.

She snapped her head at me, "What?" 

"They won't have them out in the actual photo I'll be covering them up, Did you not realize that?" I couldn't help but find her cluelessness a little funny.

"Like hell, I knew this would happen!" She said in a harsh whisper. "If I had known that I wouldn't have said yes." 

"We don't have all day come on sweetie I know Levi Ackerman can be intimidating but he won't bite will you?" He asked me. 

I looked down "I'll try," 

F/n only glared at me. 

I shook my head with a smile. I'm taking this too far now, "It's fine. You don't have to do this. I can do the shoot another day-" 

"Shut up, I'll do it." 

I ran my hands through my hair, "You don't have too." 

But before I could convince her she and tore her robe off showing off her breast. I couldn't help but stare. "Are we going to get this over with or not?" she snapped at me. 

Suddenly I felt like the one with the spotlight on me. I know I've seen her topless before. But I don't know something about her right now was doing something to me. F/n's beautiful. 

"Listen, Levi, I don't know what I'm doing, but just don't let me look stupid okay?" She said softly for only me to here. 

I smiled at her and took her hand, "I'll take care of you." 

~.~.~.~ 

The shoot was fine. 

Better than fine, the most fun I've ever had in one of these. After like few F/n seemed to get the hang of things and our bodies moved in a perfect sink with each other. You would think we were made for each other the way our bodies fit together. I know she just had to feel it some part of her too. And the crazy part too was I know I've been close to her since we've been reunited, I've held her but this time was different. When my lips we so close to her neck I just wanted to kiss her. To take away her pain. I shook my head I don't have the right to see her anymore then a friend. Hell, I should be lucky she even wants me this close to her still. It's my fault this has happened to her. I know she says she doesn't blame me, but somewhere in her mind, she has too. I know she does. And that's fine, I hate me too. But I just want her to let me help her. That's the only thing I can do for her now.

The shoot was over now and we were both getting had our clothes on and were walking out the door, I hadn't said anything to her. I'm still trying to figure things out in a sense. We were just almost out the door when I head her name called out. We looked back to see the Zolf.

"Ms, I never got your name, and you left before I could say anything to you, but you were amazing! I can never thank you enough for what you did today." He walks taking to F/n.

"Oh?' She pulled some hair behind her ear, "It's F/n. Um, don't mention. I guess I'm glad I could help." 

"Well, F/n you were a natural and a hero today, here." Zolf pulled out his card. 

"Give me a call, you have a real gift with the camera, I would love to have you in some of my other pieces," He took her hand and gave it a kiss, "Until then." Then he walked off. 

F/n looked back at me her eyes wide, "What the hell was that?"

"Apparently you're a natural." 

"That's crazy!" She was covering her mouth trying not to laugh out loud. 

I smiled, "I always say you're beautiful. See now I'm not the only one who thinks it." 

"But it's insane? Me a natural? That whole thing was unreal!" She exclaimed.

"So you had fun?" I asked.

"Surprisingly yes," 

"I didn't think you would," I told her honestly. If she was uncountable with doing it I wouldn't have let her, but in the end, she had insisted. I didn't think she'd like it this much though.

"I know right!" She started to laugh again this time dropping her hand from her mouth. Good, I like seeing her smile, and I couldn't help but smile hearing her happy just made my day. Even to this day, I honestly didn't think she'd do it, but I guess at the end of the day you're just full of surprises. 

How can I not be in love with her?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!!
> 
> So this chapter would have been up days ago but right before I posted it my computer restarted and everything was lost -.- but it is here now! 
> 
> I hope you all like this chapter! If so please leave a kudo and a comment! 
> 
> xoxo


	44. Chapter 44

Levi Pov

I sighed and answered my phone, "Hey."

"You wanna explain to me why is my husband to be is in these hideous pictures with his Ex!" Cira yelled at me over the phone.

"I don't know I thought they were kinda hot." The photos we took yesterday were everywhere today. No one really went crazy about F/n they just figured she was a model but Cira knew there was more to us then what met the eye. So I can get why she's upset, but I didn't think I'd have to explain to her that I'm not doing anything with F/n. She should know me better than that I wouldn't cheat. 

"Levi Ackerman you had better not be cheating on me, I will end you! Do you know who I am? Do you think you can do this to me? I'll have you know-" 

I rolled my eyes, "Clam down, I was joking. F/n only helped me with that photo shoot, nothing more." I told her honestly. I should know better to rail up Cira like this. But it was a bit funny. I don't get why she has to be so dramatic.

"I didn't find that very funny." She said with a pout in her voice. 

"Sorry, I didn't mean to make you mad. I was just playing around. Like I said it was just a last minute thing at the shoot. Besides F/n and I are just friends." I told her. 

"Well, keep it that way. I already told you I don't like her in my house, but to be going to work with you too is too much, she needs a Hobby. That doesn't include you." 

"How is it going out there?" I changed the subject. Hearing Cira talk about F/n was only going to piss me off, and I've honestly been in a good mood yesterday was fun. The photo shoot, we went out to eat. It was a good day and I checked on her last night when she was sleep, and she slept through the night. I want today to go good too.

"I'll be home tomorrow, we should go out then." Cira said, "We haven't been seen out together in a minute. I want us to stay relevant especially since you insist taking old trash out like you've been. The public needs to know I'm still in the picture." 

"Cira, I asked you not to talk about her like that." 

She laughed, "You know I'm just joking call it payback." 

I sighed, she was such a bitch sometimes. I can't blame her though, I guess. "And anyway. I'll be out with my family this weekend." 

"Ew, can't you cancel?" 

"No, I told them I'd go." 

"Is she going to be with you?" 

"Who's she?" 

"Don't play dumb." 

"Yes F/n will be there, remember she knows my mom and Mikasa, they wanted to hang out." 

Cira sighed over the phone, "Sounds like such a drag, I'll find something fun to do over here for the weekend. I'll see you Monday make time for me because when I get home I want you all to myself." Then she hung up. I sighed, God she was difficult. But still, she can be sweet when she wants. 

"Is this good?" The moving man asked once he was down setting up everything. 

I nodded, "Yeah, it will work here." I finished talking to him and walked him and the moving guys out. 

Now to wake F/n up.

I went inside her room to see her laid out on the bed. limbs everywhere, she was a mess. An adorable mess. I walked over to her an sat on the bed. "Wake up." 

She groaned. I guess she was already half up usually it would take her forever to get up. "Come on I got something to show you," 

"I don't wanna see it." She mumbled. 

"You'll like it." 

"The only thing I'll like is if you left me alone to sleep," She said keeping her eyes shut.

"If you don't get up I'll drag you out of bed." 

"Do you're worst I'm not scared of you." She said with a smirk on her face never opening her eyes.

I smiled to myself. She loved to test me. So I stood up then took her foot and started to slowly drag her out of bed. "Come on." 

F/n was fighting to keep her eyes closed and her body lose. "Get up," I told her.

"No!" 

"Ouch," She fell on the floor. "Ouch," 

"I'll keep dragging you." 

F/n finally sat up opening her eyes, "You ass, I'm not getting up further than this." 

"I'll just pick you up." 

"Then you'll just have too." She crossed her arms. 

I shook my head, she was such a pain. I started to bend over to pick her up. "Wait! No! Levi put me down!" 

"This is what you wanted," I said throwing her over my shoulders. 

"I didn't think you'd do it!" She was half yelling half laughing so I know I didn't take it too far. It was nice to see her like this. Looks like today is going to be another good day.

Your Pov

"Put me down Levi!" I cried out to him. But Levi wasn't letting go. He just ignored me, "Come on I'll walk the rest of the way." 

"Tsk, soon as I put you down you'll just try to go back to sleep." 

He wasn't wrong, I laughed, "But don't you wanna just stay in bed all day? We can watch movies. Eat junk food." I joked with him. Even though those things sounded nice, I didn't actually want to stay in bed all day I've done that enough, but still, I wasn't ready to get up for the day. "What do you want to show me anyway?" 

"This," Levi said putting me down and turning on the light to the room he just walked us too. He was walking for a while so it must be on the further side of his house excuse me mansion. 

When the light came on I saw it was a gym. It wasn't a full-size gym, but it looked like it had just enough for Levi.

I frowned, "You wanted to show me your gym? I have to say I never thought you for a gym rat or anything Levi, but I guess you have to stay in shape somehow." I told him while I was looking over everything. 

"Tsk, idiot. Right here." He walked over to two treadmills next to each other. 

"So you like to run?" 

He rolled his eyes. "I got it for you. Well, I had one already but I got the other set up next to mine for you." 

Well, that was an unexpected gift. "Er, Why? Not that I'm not grateful. I just-" 

"I was doing some reading, and a way to help with the withdraws or just to give you something to do is just being active. I know you used to run all the time, and I read running is a good way to recover. A lot of people get into it after rehab or whatever I and figured it's a good place to start. And I just got the one for you so I can run with you. You don't have to be alone. Ideally, we'd be able to run outside in the fresh air, but being who I am It would be pretty hard, not to say we can't try some days." 

I smiled at him. I didn't deserve him in my life. Levi even to this day cares so much. He was still talking but I just gave him a hug. 

Levi hesitated for a moment, "What's this for?" 

I held him tighter for a moment, "Not giving up on me." I pulled away. I didn't want to make it awkward. "Um, anyway thank you. I can't wait to start running." 

Levi was just staring at me. God, I hate it when he does this. Maybe I shouldn't have hugged him like that. I feel like he wants me to say or do something but I have no idea what he wants? "Er, do you want to run now? I can go get some clothes on." 

Levi shook his head, "Actually no. I was thinking we can go shopping. Just the two of us today." 

"Again?" 

"Yeah, Remember the trip with my mom and Mikasa and Bella this weekend. I figured you'd want some more clothes, plus we're going to the beach and you need a swimsuit. Anyway, the last time we were out you didn't even get much, don't worry we shouldn't belong out. Besides I figured with this whole social media angle we got going it might work with us being out without too many rumors starting." 

"Yeah, except that random lady yesterday mentioned you don't have any social media, so how long do you think that will last?" 

"He just shrugged that's an easy fix, I just made a twitter."

"You just got an answer for everything," I was about to roll my eyes at him, but then out of nowhere, he tossed me a phone from his pocket. I don't know how I caught it. 

"Now what is this-" 

"I got you a phone, my number is already in there. And I made an account on Twitter, whenever you think of something I'd say just post it. Just don't make me look stupid. I mean that is your job after all." 

"Levi this is too much," I told him.

"What is?" 

I gestured at everything, "All this! Treadmills, Phones. Shopping? It's too much; I'm grateful, but you know you don't have to do all this for me. I'm not worth all this trouble." 

"Tch, I thought you said you'd let me take care of you?" 

"Within reason," I told him. It wasn't like I didn't like what he was doing. I just didn't want him getting carried away. And I feel like that's what he'll end up doing. Not to mention I know he's only really doing this to make up for that promise he made to my mom. He just couldn't see that I was fine with just moving on he didn't need to feel guilty he didn't do anything wrong. I did. I was the one who lied to him, I should have just told him the truth that day instead of leaving with Samuel. 

Levi sighed, "It is within reason." 

"It is not-" 

"The treadmill is to help you recover," He said cutting me off. "Shopping today is for us to go out tomorrow, plus you need the clothes. And you need a phone. I'm not going overbored, you just need to relax okay." 

Well, when he puts it like that I guess it all makes sense, "Fine, but nothing else." 

"Tch, stop worrying," Levi said walking passed me out the room. "Let's hurry up and get ready. That way we can still have enough time to come back, start packing and still be able to lazy around all day like you wanted to bad." 

I stuck out my tongue out at him. "Fine." 

~.~.~.~.~.

we got to a store a little after twelve. It wasn't too busy. I looked over at Levi and couldn't help but laugh. Even though he said we should be good. He was wearing these ugly shades and a hoodie. 

"You look like you're here to rob the place." 

"Shut up." 

I laughed some more, "Seriously I feel like you're bringing more attention than losing it from us." 

"Just find something you'll like, I'll be sitting by the dressing rooms." He mumbled, then walked away. Levi is such an old man. 

Once he walked away I started to look over everything. The store was so big, how was I supposed to pick anything? I feel like this was so much easier when we were out with Sasha and Mikasa. At least with them around Levi could be over here too. It's just so much for me to take in. I don't even know where to really start. 

I picked up one and looked at the price, Then I put it back. I did the same motion to about five different outfits. What the hell Levi? He should have known I wouldn't accept this. This is just too much to waste on me. I bet the people who work here really do think we're here to rob the place. Levi in his hoodie, and me the sketchy girl who keeps putting things down. 

Suddenly my new phones started to buzz. Who could this be? I haven't even looked at this thing. Who could have my number? looked at the texted it said it was from Levi. I sighed I should have none.

-would you stop putting things back down and bring some out and try them on already. 

I sighed again, I wasn't even talking that long. And how did he even know I was putting things back? I shook my head Levi knowns me way to well. 

Levi pov

I put my phone back down, after sending that text to F/n I know she was just overthinking everything. I didn't have to be around her to tell. I just know the type of person she is. Not to mention she was taking forever. 

After a few more minutes of waiting, F/n came to the back, "I'll go try on these." 

"Took you long enough." 

She looked at me and rolled her eyes, "You know I don't like you spending a whole bunch of money on me and this places prices are insane." 

"You're going to run into that problem everywhere we go. L.A. is just expensive like that." 

"I'm sure there are places that are not this bad. Take me to Wal-Mart somewhere." 

I frowned at her, who the hell did she think I was? "I am not taking you to Wal-Mart for clothes." I sighed, I get how she may feel but still. I can't help it, F/n should only be in the best. "You're just going to have to get used to it-" 

"Levi-" 

"All I'm saying now is, I have the means to take care of you now, Back when we were kids all I ever wanted to do was be able to get the people I loved what they needed what they wanted to be happy and now I can so just let me. Let me help you out just a bit." 

F/n looked away. "Fine." 

I watched her walk in the dressing room. I hope that didn't upset her. But I was telling her the truth. I'm not trying to take away her independence or anything; I'm just trying to help her get on her feet. I haven't even done anything crazy I have a good reason for everything I've done for her, no point have I just wasted money on her. She has to see that, I know she does. She just- She's just overthinking this. She so worried about being a burden on me she can't see that everything I'm doing is completely normal. 

A few minutes passed and F/n walked out. With a little sundress. "Do you like it?" 

She didn't seem all that happy. "Do you?" I asked her. I didn't want her to be upset but I don't see how this is going to work and neither of us is giving in. I know I'm not wasting money on her, and she thinks this is too much. 

"Levi, this-I...It's just weird. I don't like the idea of you spending your hard earned money like this." 

I sighed, How do I get this through her head? "Okay, what about it I just say it's on loan?" 

"Huh?" 

"You can pay me back once you got a job." 

"Seriously?

"Yeah," I lied. I would never take money back from her. But still this might be the only solution for this right now, I have to treat her like a child with this. "I'll keep all the receipts and after you get a job you can just pay me back. Will that makes you feel better about this?" 

She looked like she was thinking about it. "I guess that's the only way were both going to be able to move on from this right now so yes. But I get to keep all the receipts I'm not dumb Levi I know you'll just say you lost them or something. And you had better take the money when I give it back to you." 

I smiled nothing get passed her, "Fine, sure." I agreed. I still know I won't take it, but if it seemed like this was going to be the only way for us to move one. "Now do you like that dress?" 

F/n looked back in the mirror and twirled, "It's cute." 

"But?" 

She just shrugged, "Let's just say it's a maybe. I'll go try something else on. 

F/n went back into the dressing room and tried some more things on. It was fun watching her play around in the clothes. What she liked what she didn't. It was going way better then it did the other day. I guess after we agreed to that stuff about the money. It was a little reassuring for her to know she wasn't being a burden on me, or at least that's what I hope. 

We were going through swimming suits now, most of the one F/n was walking out wearing were nice, but she didn't like them. I thought they all looked hot, it was F/n after all she could make anything sexy. She came out with one bikini that was like a little top and the bottoms were shorts. Again hot, the way it just fit her perfectly. It was pink and black too. I know pink is like her favorite color too. I think I liked this one the most. It was sexy and still F/n she looked comfortable it suited her.

"I like that one the most," I told her.

F/n looked in the mirror, "Yeah, I like this one a lot too. It's cute." 

"Beautiful more like it," I spoke without thinking. 

F/n looked at me from in the mirror, "Thanks." Her voice was soft. 

I wonder what she was thinking? It was like she wanted to say something but kept it to herself. I wished she'd just be more honest with me, but I know that's something we're going to have to keep working too. But I don't mind waiting. I'll wait for F/n for forever.

Your Pov

Levi and I had just got back home. 

Today was fun. I know We had a little disagreement earlier, but in the end, we figured something out. I know Levi will try to fight it when the time comes for me to pay him back and that's going to be a whole nother set of issues, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there. For now, I just want to live in the moment. 

"I'm going to go pack." I told Levi walking into my room, "I guess I'll see you tomorrow." 

"Er, You didn't want to watch movies all day or anything? It's still pretty early you know you don't have to go straight to bed. Don't be weird," He told me.

I looked away, "I'm not being weird." 

"Are too." 

"Am not." 

"Suit yourself." 

I rolled my eyes and started to walk to my room. I wasn't being weird. He was. I was still stuck on him calling me beautiful today. Doesn't he know he can't do things like that to me? I know we can't be anything, but damn him. He can't call me beautiful. I'll want more. I want more. When I see him sometimes all I can think is how much I still love him, but then I think about how I can never have him. He wants to get married to another woman. Besides, he said he sees me as his friend. He doesn't even see me like that anymore. 

What Levi and I had was nice, but it was years ago. It was over now. Now we're back to what we were when were younger, and I need to respect that. I know he didn't mean anything by calling me beautiful so I don't need to read into it. Nothing good will come out of me overthinking it. I need to get through my head.

~.~.~

It was later into the afternoon when I heard a knock on my door. 

"Come in," I called out. It had to be Levi. 

He walked in with a bowl of popcorn. I frowned, "What are you doing?" 

"Relaxing, What are you doing?" 

"Nothing, watching TV," I told him sitting up from my bed. 

"Oh, I wanted you to see this," Levi said inviting himself further into my room and sitting on my bed and showing me his phone. It was his twitter. I keep forgetting I'm supposed to be helping him that.

"I've been trying to figure this out myself, then I saw I was trending, and it's our pictures," He said handing me his phone. I looked on his phone and sure enough there we were.

"They look so professional," I told him impressed. I didn't know I could ever look so good. It was kinda unreal.

"There supposed too." 

I rolled my eyes, "That's crazy. What is everyone saying about you?" 

"Just how hot I am," He said stuffing his face with popcorn. 

I laughed, "If only they could see the real you, not as nearly as hot as you try to be." 

"Hater," 

"I stuck out my tongue out at him." 

"So are you ready for tomorrow?" 

"Yeah, You?" 

"Yeah, it should be fun. Mikasa and my mom are excited no doubt, it's been a minute since the last time we've all done something," Levi said laying down beside me. 

"Where'd you go last time?" 

"Come resort, But it wasn't that fun, Cira went and all the did was argue," He told me.

"Oh, so is Cira going to be going with us tomorrow? Will she make it back?" 

"No, thank god, I know she'd be cranky the whole time." 

"That's not a nice way to talk about the girl you love," I tried to joke with him. 

Levi didn't say anything, he just looked up at the ceiling. 

I trailed off with a laugh trying to lighten up the mood, "Well, I'm excited." I told him honestly. And knowing Cira wasn't going to be there made me feel a bit better. Not to be mean or anything, but at least I knew there won't be any weird moment with them and I won't feel like a third wheel. Plus I know she doesn't like me that much. 

"I never got a chance to ask you what do you think of Cira?" Levi asked me out of nowhere. 

That was a random question, "She's okay...I mean she's nice," 

"You don't have to lie." 

"I'm not lying...She's a person." I didn't want to talk bad about the person Levi is in love with. It isn't right for me. "It's not my place to say." 

"Well, don't the two of you look cozy." 

Levi and I both looked up and my door and saw Cira standing in the doorway. She was back? When did she get back did she hear what we were talking about?

"Cira? What are you doing back?" Levi asked sitting up.

"I did some thinking and I figured why wait till Monday to see you? Besides if you're going on a family weekend I should go too right I am family." 

Levi got up from my bed and started walking to her, "True." 

"It's going to be so much fun, Anyway I've missed you so much babe," she said hugging him and giving him a kiss. I noticed how when she did kiss him she glared at me too. I just looked away. 

They pulled away and she looked and, "Oh, (something close to your name but not your name) You're still here." 

"It's F/n, and yeah," I corrected her.

She smiled, "Well, anyway it should be fun tomorrow, Levi I want to talk to you about my trip." Then without saying anything else she pulled him out my room and walked away leaving me alone. 

I sighed and lied back on my bed. 

Well, there goes the chances of a good trip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks a bunch for reading!! 
> 
> Notes are short today cause I'm writing this five minutes before I need to clock in for work! But I hope you all liked this chapter! Next chapter will be interesting.
> 
> Again thanks a bunch love you all hope you leave a kudo and comment!
> 
> xoxo


	45. Chapter 45

Levi Pov

"I thought you weren't coming back till Monday?" I asked Cira. 

"I wanted to surprise you," She smiled and said. 

I just looked at her. It wasn't that I didn't want her to be here. I just wasn't mentally prepared to deal with her especially with going out with us tomorrow. I was really looking forward to it just being my mom Mikasa me, and F/n, I wanted it to be like how it used to be. Not just for me, but for F/n, It would be good for her. Just for things to feel normal for a moment. But now with Cira with us. I just know something will happen.

"Oh, come on don't look so sad," Cira said taking me out of my thoughts. "I'm here, besides I was listening to this podcast or something and they started talking about that girl and you in those pics, and they said that there was no way in hell any normal woman would let their man take pictures like that and I figured I needed to show her who really was in charge. Those pictures just didn't sit right with me. Her all over you." 

"I told you it wasn't anything bad." 

"Yeah, you said that. But I'm not stupid if she has half a brain then she would want you back. Your being nieve." 

I rubbed my face, "I am not. She has no reason to have those same feelings for me, Remeber It was me who left her. Why would she want me back like that." 

"Tch," Cira rolled her eyes, "Anyway, This weekend should be fun. I'm going to go take a shower and I hope to see you on the bed and ready for me when I get out." Then Cira left out.

I sighed, I didn't really feel like sex right now. She's so fucking demanding. I bet if I don't do anything with her she'll blame F/n. Thinking of F/n I should check on her while Cira is in the shower. 

I went ahead down to her room and knocked on her door. No answer. I knocked again, still nothing. She's not going through another one is she? I opened her door only to see she wasn't in there. I walked into the kitchen maybe she was in there? But she wasn't. Where did she go? Why would she leave without saying anything? I went up the little theater, she wasn't in here. I took my phone out and called her. I almost forgot I got her one. I stood there tapping my foot hoping she would answer. Still no answer. What the hell F/n? I called again.

"Hey?" She finally answered.

"Where are you?" 

"In the gym? Why?" 

I let go of my breath. God, she's going to drive me crazy. "I had gone into your room and couldn't find you. Stay there I'll be down in a sec," 

"Yeah sure thing." 

I hung up and headed down to the gym. It didn't take me long to get there. At least not anymore, at first when I got this place it was kind of a drag to get from each side of the house, but since I've lived here for a while it doesn't feel as bad. I walked into the gym and saw F/n sitting down on the floor by the treadmill. 

She was breathing deeply there, I hope she's okay. I kneeled down beside her, "Are you alright?" 

She nodded, "I'm fine." She was still breathing heavy. 

"Are you sure." 

She shook her head again, "Yes Levi, I just needed to let off some steam. I just pushed myself too hard." 

I didn't say anything else to her for a moment. Letting her catch her breath. After a moment she got up herself and started to stretch. She looked back at me shaking her head, "I'm fine Levi, stop worrying." 

I watched her go to the little refrigerator I had and get some water, "Easier said than done." 

She smiled at me, "Um...Wait where is Cira?" 

"Shower." 

"Oh, Well I wouldn't want to keep you. You should go back to her." 

"I came down here cause I wanted to check on you. Good thing too, Who knows how much longer you would have been pushing yourself if I didn't call you." 

"I would have stopped," She sighed, "Anyway. I guess thanks" 

"I wanted to say sorry too," I told her.

"For what?" 

"Cira, I know she can be a bitch sometimes. That's just part of her personality it kinda grows on you after a while. That and her coming with us tomorrow. I know it was just going to be us and-" 

"Levi it's fine," She cut me off, "She's important to you, So she's important to me. I'm sure we'll warm up to each other. And remember Bella will be there tomorrow too so it's not like I'll be a third wheel or something. It's fine. Really, Levi, it is." 

"You don't have to-" 

"Levi," She said my name in a warning tone. "Would you relax," She motioned for me to walk with her as she was leaving the gym, "What I think doesn't even matter you wanna live the rest of your life with this woman she should go on family trips with you...I'm the one who's out of place." 

"That's not true," I blurted out.

She gave me a small smile, but I wanted her to know the truth. I started walking out the door with her, "Despite what Cira says I don't actually plan on marrying her." 

She looked at me confused, "Why not? Levi, you-" 

"I never wanted to marry anyone...besides you that is. But after all, that happened. I just never saw myself with anyone else for the long game," I told her honestly.

She looked like she was thinking about something, but then she turned to me, "I'm sorry, for what happened to us, but you can't let that stop you from being with the person you love. You both been together for these last five years, right? That's practically married." 

I couldn't get a good read on what she was thinking as I looked at her. All I could think is how I didn't even mind the thought of still marrying her. If I could have her back in my life the way we were back then. But she doesn't want me. Not like that. Why would she? I sighed, "It's just complicated." 

She chuckled, "Isn't life always?" 

We got to her room, And she sighed loudly, "Welp, good night Levi." 

"See you in the morning?" I asked her. 

She nodded, "Yeah, Thanks again, for coming down there checking on me. But you should really go see Cira before she gets upset or something." 

"She'll be fine." 

"Levi I'm not that important y-" 

"Would you stop saying that," I cut her off. I moved closer to her planing both my hands on her face making her look at me, "F/n, you are the most important person in my life. I don't know what I'd do if anything else happened too. I'll always worry about you and I'll always want to take care of you. You're everything to me." I looked deep into her eye as I spoke I just wanted to get that through her thick head. I might not have the right to be in a relationship with her, but that won't stop me from loving her. 

"Levi," She trailed off, "You-I" Whatever she was going she just shook her head and took my hands down from her face, "Levi I-" 

"Leviiiii!" 

I heard my name yelled from my bedroom. It was Cira. 

F/n let my hands go completely, "You should go to her, Goodnight." Then she closed her door.

What was she going to say? What was she thinking?

"Leviiiiiiiiii!" Cira yelled louder. 

I sighed looking at F/n's door Then I turned and started to walk to my bedroom.

Your Pov

The sun was starting to come up and I could hear the birds chirping. 

I couldn't sleep last night.

All I can think about is Levi. Why is he like this? Why would he say that? Why does he have to be so sweet? And care so much. For a moment I almost told him that I loved him. That he was still just as important to me, but I know he didn't mean it the same way. He may not want to marry Cira, but that doesn't change the fact that he's with her, and that he's been with her for the last five years. I can't come in the picture and think things will go back to how we used to be. Were adults now, with our own lives. Granted mines is fucked right now, but his isn't. Levi knows what he's doing in his life, and I haven't been a part of it for years. Besides, I have to remember Levi still feels guilty because of the whole thing with my mom. Levi can just be stubborn sometimes and this is one of those situations. Just give him some time he'll see he doesn't need me.

Just then I heard a knock at my door. 

"F/n you had better be up," Levi said. "I'm starting to loud our shit up in the car." 

As if I could sleep. Hopefully, I can just sleep in the car. Surprisingly I didn't have an issue with Cira being loud like she was that first night. Maybe she might act regular...than again. She hasn't really done anything to be beside some side comments. I mean I get she doesn't like why would she? I just have to not say or do anything to get her upset and I think that might help this weekend go by alright. 

I think Levi is really worried about that.I'll just act normal, and try to have fun and I'll do my best not to add to the stress, I know how Mikasa can be, and if she really doesn't like Cira like she says she doesn't I know she might try and get on her nerve. I sighed this is going to be an interesting weekend for sure. 

"Come on F/n," Levi knocked on my door again. 

This time I opened it. I was already dressed and ready to leave since I couldn't sleep last night, "Bet you thought I was still laid out in bed," I teased him walking out my room now with my bag. 

Levi took it from me, "I'm impressed, I thought I'd have to drag you out of bed again." 

"It's not that heavy of a bad Levi she can carry it," Cira said standing on the other side of the hall. She was all dressed like a...well a movie star. Guess I can't expect anything less from her. 

I looked back at Levi, "It's fine I can take it." 

He rolled his eyes, "I got it." 

"It's cool, I got it." I tried to protest. 

"I'm sitting in the car," Cira said walking away.

I looked back to Levi, "Levi, Is she okay?" I asked him. I just felt like she was more annoyed than usual. 

"She's pissed at me," 

I frowned, "What did you do?" 

Levi looked like he was thinking if he should tell me or not, "Don't worry about it. Just try and have a good time. We're going to my moms and we'll meet up there then we're all going to take off okay." 

I nodded, I'll be sitting in a car with Cira and Levi. 

Goody.

~.~.~.~.~

The ride to Kuchel's was...I can't say awkward, but it wasn't pleasant either. No one said anything. and it was just like a dark cloud over all of us. It was clear Cira was angry about something, but Levi wouldn't tell me. Oh, God, I hope it's not something I did. I really want us all to have a good weekend.

We pulled up to Kuchel's house and saw three cars sitting out Mikasa was standing next to one of them. I smiled to myself it was so nice to see her again. We all got out the car, when Mikasa saw us her face lighted up but then it went into a frown just as quick.

"What's she doing here?" She asked plainly.

"Levi insisted bring his childhood friend," Cira spoke up crossing her arms.

"I was talking about you." 

Cira just rolled her eyes. 

Mikasa looked at Levi, "This is supposed to be a family thing." 

"She's my girlfriend, Mikasa." 

"That no one like-" 

"Hey Mikasa," I stepped between them. "You look great, are you ready?" I started to walk towards the house Mikasa looked back at Levi and Cira, but I pulled at her arms again, "Where is your mom?" I didn't want them to get into it before we even left. Someone was going to have to be the biger person in this, and I guess it was going to be me. 

Mikasa just clicked her tongue, right in my ear I might add, but she walked me into the kitchen, "Mom, Levi, and F/n are here. They bought some trash with them too." 

I nudged her side, "Be nice Mikasa." 

"Ooo goody, tell Levi to come in and help with my stuff," She said walking from upstairs, "F/n! She called my name when she saw me and gave me a hug. 

I hugged her back tightly. It was still so nice to see her. 

"Did you night hear me? he brought Cira." Mikasa told her once she pulled away. 

"Why would he do that?" Kuchel frowned. I chuckled to myself. They really don't like her. 

"Come on guys, he loves her, you guys should support him. Anyway, she's not that bad," I said trying to be a voice of reason here.

They both looked at me like I grew a horn on my head or something. I laughed out loud they were all so dramatic, "Where is Bella?" 

"They'll be down in a minute," Mikasa said rolling her eyes. 

"They'll?" 

"Hey, who's car is that out there?" Levi asked walking in the house with Cira behind him. 

"Ohmygod he really brought her, I hoped you two were joking," Kuchel said under her breath were only Mikasa and I had heard her. "Well, hello Levi," Kuchel hugged him. She looked at Cira, "Cira." 

"Rachel," Cira responded back with. 

Shit, this was bad. How the hell am I supposed to try to help keep everyone from going off on each other all weekend?

"Was that F/n voice I heard!" Bella came running down the steps, "It was!" She yelled when she saw me and jumped in my arms. 

"It's good to see you too Bella." 

She got down, "Ooo, you'll love this, Babe hurry up!" She yelled up the steps. 

"I'm coming, I'm coming, your bag is heavy as shit," a man's voice said from upstairs. 

"Is that-" 

"Furlan?" Levi finished for me, walking past me to check. 

And sure enough, Furlan came down the steps with two bags, I'm guessing his and Bella's stuff.

"I told you not to take that upstairs last night," Mikasa said sitting on the counter. 

"Yeah, I wished I listened," Furlan said stretching then giving Levi a quick hug.

"When did you get here?" 

"He came in last night," Bella answered. "I convinced him to come with us, I did not want to be the third wheel on this trip. I just know Mikasa and Kuchel would shake up, and knowing you and Levi's history I just know you two would end up hooking on this trip." 

My eyes went wide at her words. What was wrong with her.

Bella laughed, "What's with that look? You the second the two of you are alone you're going to be at each other's throats if you already haven't." 

Mikasa started to cough loudly. 

"You okay?" Bella asked her.

"She's-standing--right-there-" Mikasa said between the fake coughs.

"Who?" Bella asked dumbly. 

"Cira is sweetie," Kuchel said pointing to a less than happy Cira standing in the doorway.

All the color drained from Bella's face, "Hey, CiCi. Didn't see you there." 

Cira just rolled her eyes, "Well, I'm here." She gave a fake smile.

"And no one wants you here."

"Can the two of you not start this," Levi spoke up. 

"I didn't do anything," Cira spat at him, "It's your whole fa- You know what I'll go sit in the car." Then she walked out of the room.

"Can you guys just act nice this trip?" Levi asked glaring at all of us, "Just don't fucking edge each other on and don't start fights." Levi said walking out after her. But then he turned around, "Furlan let me talk to you for a sec." 

Furlan nodded and walked out leaving just me Kuchel, Bella, and Mikasa alone.

Mikasa and Bella busted out laughing.

"Oh My God, I can't believe I just said all that in front of her!" 

"Me either, you should have seen her face!" Mikasa laughed back with her.

"That was nice funny," I told them, "She already hates me. You'll just make it worst." 

"You both play nice, like Levi said." Kuchel stepped in, she snickered a little, "But that was a little funny." 

I shook my head, "You're just as worst." 

"Where do you think Mikasa gets it from," She winked. 

"Oi, So Bella you and Furlan are going to ride with me and Cira, Mom, you F/n and Mikasa can ride in your car. If we leave now it shouldn't take us that long to get there." Levi said walking back into the kitchen. 

"Gross, I don't want to ride in the care with the two of you," Bella spoke up.

"Not another word from you." Levi told her looking annoyed, "As a matter of fact just don't say anything the whole ride." Then he turned to Mikasa and Kuchel, "Can the two of you try and be civil? If not for me then for F/n? No one wants to hear you go back with Cira the whole trip okay?" Then he started to walk off.

"Tsk, no lecture for F/n?" Mikasa challenged him. 

"F/n is perfect. So no," He walked out.

I couldn't help but feel a little proud of myself. 

"You know he still loves you right?" Mikasa said, "I don't know why you won't just tell Cira, you're back and she's no longer needed or wanted." 

I snorted, "As if. Levi may love me still, but I know it's not like that." 

And that was fine. It will be okay. At least that's what I keep trying to convince myself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks a bunch for reading
> 
> So things are getting interesting, I wonder what shenanigans will go on in the next chapter 
> 
> As always thank you all so much for reading! I hope you all have been enjoying the last few chapters. If not tell me, if so tell me. Feedback really helps me out with the story~
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> Anyways you're all the best <3
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> xoxo


	46. Chapter 46

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii new chapter yay! 
> 
> Don't forget to comment or leave a kudo! <3

Levi Pov

We finally got to the resort and saying that it was a relief to get out of that car would be a huge understatement. The whole ride was sour, Cira's pissed at me. Furlan was just there and because of Bella's comment earlier I just told her to shut up the whole ride. I looked over at F/n who was getting out of the car with my mom and Mikasa they seemed to be laughing. At least they're happy. 

"Finally," Bella said out loud walking to the three of them. I looked over at Cira who was stretching I wish they all could get along. I walked up to her, "You okay?" 

She looked and rolled her eyes at me, "Oh, so you care now?" 

"Cira don't start. I already talked to them, They'll be nice you have to be too," I told her. 

"Whatever," was all she said, then she started to walk into the hotel. 

I rubbed my face, this was my fault. Why was I fucking up so hard lately? I need Cira to forgive me so at least she won't be shitty to F/n. The last thing I need is for her going off on her for something she didn't even do.

"So what's wrong with her," Furlan asked leaning on the car next to me while I was getting our bags out. 

"Tsk, What are you talking about?" 

"Don't act dumb. Cira is acting more pissy than usual." 

"I-" 

"Don't even lie, what happened?" 

I shook my head at him he knows me too well, "I fucked up last night. Big time." 

"You didn't cheat on her with F/n? Did you?" 

"What? No. I wouldn't do that to either one of them." I shook my head again, "We were having sex last night and I called her F/n." 

"Ooo, no wonder she's so pissed at you. How'd you fuck up that bad?" He laughed.

"I don't know, I was in the moment. I was thinking about F/n, and it just came out. Cira's been pissed off at me ever since. And with that shit Bella was saying only made it worst," I told him.

Furlan shook his head at me, "That's fucked up man. Wait? So you're still into F/n I mean I knew you were, but you're like still crazy in love with her? Even with everything that happened between the two of you?" 

I shook my head, "I told you it wasn't even her fault. If it was anyone it was mine. I abandoned her, and I don't know? Maybe? I mean I've always felt the same way about her, it's just so fucked up right now. All I know I'm trying to do it make it up to Cira, at least then we all might have a better time." 

"What are two over here gossiping about?" I looked over my mom and the other girls were walking up to us. 

"Nothing, just getting all our stuff," Furlan laughed taking a bag." 

"Bella says your ride was a whole lot of fun," My mom said. 

"Tsk anything but," Furlan laughed, "But you guys look like you had loads of fun." 

"It was wasn't it?" mom said nudging F/n making her laugh. I guess some type of inside joke they had. That made me a little happy. Seems like they're getting along just fine, I never had any doubt that they wouldn't but I know F/n can be in her own thoughts sometimes. But she seems to be managing.

"What are we still standing here for let's go get into our rooms I'm ready to go to the poolside," Mikasa said. 

"Oi, make sure you guys invite Cira when you go out," I told them.

"And why would we do that?" Mikasa asked. 

I groaned, she had more of a problem with Cira then anyone else I knew. Mikasa never liked her, even when I first introduced them to each other. Mikasa made it clear she didn't like her all the time, not to say Cira was any better. "Mikasa, would you just act right for three days with Cira? She's here and we're all going to have to get along." 

"We'd get along a lot better if you didn't bring her," She spat out. 

"You expect me to just leave my girlfriend at home?" 

"Ugh, yeah." 

"Hey, you guys stop it," F/n stepped in. "We're going to have a good time okay?" She looked at both of us. 

"I didn't say we weren't-" Mikasa started but F/n cut her off.

"I know, but we're going to have a good time with Cira too." she looked at Bella and my mom this time, "Cira is Levi's girlfriend. She's important to him, so she should be important to you guys too. She might not be the nices person, but neither are you guys at least from what I've seen when it comes to her..." She shook her head laughing, "My point is; let's all try to just get along, who knows you guys might even bound or something." 

Mikasa rolled her eyes and headed into the hotel. My mom just smiled at F/n, "Well, try F/n." 

Bella and Furlan just laughed, also agreeing and walking into the hotel. 

F/n put her hands on her hips looking like she had just really accomplished something then she turned to me, "You would think they were all Five-year-olds," she laughed. 

"Thank you," I told her. How can I help but fall in love with her all over again? She's the same kind person from five years ago. She's the same silly girl I've always known. The only difference now is I know I've messed it up between us. I should have never left her. And deep down in my head I know I should have never gotten with Cira. Not to say she's a bad person but I don't need to be with anyone that doesn't get along with my family this much. Plus it's not just my mom and Mikasa Bella and Furlan too. No one likes her. I bearly like her most of the time. It might sound bad but the truth is she was just a place holder for F/n.

F/n waved me off, "It's fine... And by the way I am so sorry for that nonsense Bella was saying earlier, I hope it didn't upset Cira too much, I don't want her getting the wrong idea." She shook her head, "I just don't know what their issue is with each other, they could at least try" 

I sighed, "I told you already." 

"Oh? And what was that?" She asked

"Cause she's not you," I told her bluntly. 

F/n seemed to freeze a bit, but she pulled some of her hair behind her ear, "They just have to realize...that time in our lives is over. We're just friends now." 

"Yeah...just friends." Why would she want to be anything more with the person who abandoned her to live in hell. 

You pov

This place was amazing!

it was a nice private resort. Levi had mentioned he picked this place so there wouldn't be anyone taking pictures of all of us or anything. It's kinda hard to believe this is Levi's life now, trying his best to just keep his privacy. I'll say it over and over again, it's just weird.

"Are you getting anything F/n?" Kuchel asked me taking me out of my thoughts, we were currently shopping in the gift shop. Bella had convened us all to walk in before we got to the pool.

"Oh no," I waved her off, "I'm just looking at all the stuff. It's really cute." And expense. I thought. I swear everything in this city is overpriced. 

"Big bro what do you think about this?" I looked over the aisle and saw Bella with some tacky shirt she was showing him. 

Levi frowned, "Why on earth would you think I'd ever wear that?" 

"Cause she saw what you wore to that last award show." Mikasa teased him.

"Tsk, Would you give it a rest already, I didn't look bad."

"Are you talking about that green suit he had on that one time?" Furlan asked. 

Bella and Mikasa both nodded laughing. Furlan started laughing now too, "Yeah, what made you think that was a good idea." 

I watched them all joke around, and I couldn't help but feel a little sad. They all grew with each other. They stayed close and it's just like old times. Only now I feel like an outsider.

"F/n do you know what suit we're talking about?" Bella asked.

I shook my head, "No, can't say that I do." 

Mikasa passed me her phone showing me a picture of Levi in this hideous green suit, I didn't mean too, but I busted out laughing as soon as I saw it, "Levi, why would you? You look like a Christmas tree! Was it your birthday? Is that what it was?" I couldn't stop laughing he looked so silly.

"Okay, just laugh it up," Levi said rolling his eyes at us.

"That's what I said when I saw it on the news," Kuchel laughed, making us all laugh harder. 

I wiped the tears from my eyes. It was always so funny to see Levi out of his cool guy mood, and although his face looked normal his outfit said a whole nother story. "What made you were that?" I asked him.

"It was my idea actually, I thought he looked cute," Cira said walking up to his side and kissing his cheek. "It was one of my designers and I owned them a favor and so I let them dress Levi." 

Everyone seemed to stop laughing when she stepped in. God, why do they have to be this way to her? I get it she's a bitch, but still. It wasn't right. "Oh, well I would say you both owe Levi now for making him your lifesize model that suit is gross. I wouldn't lie to you Levi" I tried to joke. 

But Cira glared at me, "Oh, and what would you know about fashion? All I've ever seen you were is shorts and T-shirts like a bum." 

I took in a sharp breath. But I let it go quickly, I'm not going to get on their Level, I'm going to be the bigger person and have fun. "I prefer comfort over everything else, It's pretty hard to relax when you're worrying about your outfit, ya know?"

"To each, their own I suppose," Cira said, "I can still be comfortable, I mean I was just raised that way you know properly?" 

"CIra," Levi said in a warning tone to her. But she smiled it off, "I was just stating my opinion." Then she walked off, But then she called Levi over to look at something with her, He just turned to me mouthing sorry. 

"God, I can't stand her," Bella said under her breath next to me. 

"She is an interesting person," Kuchel said to me, "But I liked the way you handled her, real classy." She nudged me. 

I just smiled her off, "Let's hurry up so we can go swimming."

Kuchel shook her head no, "I wanna talk a bit, so what's really going on with you and Levi?" Kuchel asked me looking.

I just stared back at her, "What do you mean?" 

"You know what I mean F/n. The two of you planning on getting back together?" She asked taking a quick look from him and back to me.

I laughed out loud. Why is this like the only thing they can talk about? I shook my head, "No, he has Cira, you guys know that." 

"Tsk, You saw the way she was acting," Mikasa spoke up, "I don't know what he saw in her, but I know he still likes you." 

I shook my head at her, "It's not like that though. Levi and I will always be close, but that time in our lives is over. You guys just have to move on." 

Mikasa laughed out loud, "I can't believe you guys are on this again." 

"Yeah, Their just going to have to work it out themselves again," Kuchel said with a laugh in her voice. 

I rolled my eyes at both of them. Maybe when back then they knew what they were talking about, but now it's a different story, And that's fine. It was okay. Besides, I don't need to thinking about a relationship in my life right now anyway; I have enough things to be worrying about and Levi isn't one of them.

~.~.~

We finally got to the pool after what felt like forever. And It was huge, there were just so many people here, well not that mean but still, big families, "Do you guys come here a lot?" I asked Mikasa as we were setting up our spot. 

"We've been here a few times. I think Levi and Cira have been here more without us though," She answered sitting down.

"Oh," Was all I said. So Cira and Levi must come here to relax when they're not working or something, must be nice...the life of a celebrity. I looked over at them they were sitting a bit further from us, I guess that was Levi's way to keep them all from fighting, It's a shame it has to be that way. I'm not saying I'm a fan of Cira, because I'm not It's just If I was being honest, I don't like Cira, at least she hasn't given me a reason to like her yet. She's just so rude, and she doesn't have any reason to be. Kuchel and Mikasa are nice people. 

"Oh, I'm sorry F/n," Mikasa spoke up looking at me.

"What?" 

"What I just said about Cira and Levi, I didn't mean to make you feel bad," she said.

I shook my head, "Why would that upset me? I've told you guys It's not like that anymore." 

"I swear," Mikasa said shaking her head back at me, you're exhausting." 

"No, you guys are," I rolled my eyes back at her and Kuchel. 

Just then we hear a loud yell then a splash, making us all look over to Bella who was standing by the poolside laughing her ass off, "Come on you guys!" then she jumped in the pool.

"Did she just push Furlan in the water?" Kuchel asked.

"I think so," I answered her. I swear Isabel is such a wildcard you can't help but love her. 

"You guys ready?" We turned back the other way only to see Levi standing there. 

"Oh no," Mikasa stood up, "I can get in the water on my own." Then she headed over in the pool. Making me laugh, Mikasa grew up to be such a cool woman. I always knew she would. 

"Mom?" Levi questioned Kuchel.

"You know better, leave me here with my book mess with F/n or something," SHe said pulling out her book and reading.

Levi looked down at me, "That just leaves you."

"Leaves me what?" But before I knew it Levi picked me up throwing me over his shoulder, "Oh God No!" I yelled realizing what he was about to do. 

"Too late," I heard him saw with a laughing

"Put me down Levi, I can get in my-" And before I knew it Levi threw me in the water. 

He was lucky I could swim. Soon and I got in the water went to get back to the surface, "You bastard!" I yelled, Looking back at Levi who was still standing over the pool. This evil smile on his face, "You actual ass!" I yelled half serious half laughing, trying to get the water out of my face; it was so cold. 

"I'll get you back for this," I told him.

"Oi? Really and how is that." 

As he was talking he didn't notice Kuchel creeping behind him, I only smiled back, "Don't worry about it." And before he knew it she pushed him into the water. Making me laugh, serves him right!

Levi got out of the water quick, "Shit that's cold." 

"Yeah, it is you ass!" I yelled splashing water at him. 

"Don't splash water at me," he said splashing me back, starting a war between the two of us. 

And at that moment, I was having so much fun.I didn't feel like I had all that usual baggage I carry, there was no Samuel to take me away, it was just me and the people I loved. and it was bliss.

 

Levi Pov

We were all back from the pool, and so far so good. 

They haven't killed each other yet. I should really thank F/n for that. Cira keeps pushing her by throwing little jabs at her, but every time F/n just laughs it off and comes back with something else witty. Plus she's just been doing her best to keep all our conversations light. All in all, I think she was having fun. It was the most I've seen her genuinely smile in forever. It sure was a sight to see too.

"I don't know what you're playing at Levi Ackerman, but you should know not to fuck with me," Cira said to me. We were just sitting in our room getting ready to go to sleep, Other then all the smart ass shit she's been saying Cira has been pretty quiet at least up until now.

I sighed what was wrong now? Was she still upset about last night? "Look, I'm really sorry about last night I really am, I don't know-" 

"I'm really sorry," She cut me off mocking me. "Yeah you are, but I can't believe you'd just parade in front of me all day with and expect me to be okay." 

"I wasn't parading, You could have gotten in the water too," I told her.

"And ruin my hair? Levi's you're being inconsiderate. And your family hates me, I hear what they say about me. And I just can't believe you would bring your Ex just have a good time," Cira started to cry, "I just feel so backed against a wall here, I have to be mean to them or else they'll just think they can run over me." 

I sat down beside her, "Listen, Cira, I told them to behave, but you have to too. Most of the stuff today was you staring it with F/n." 

"Am I supposed to just sit there and let her take my man then?" 

"She isn't taking me," I told her sighing.

Cira pushed me away, "Don't lie to me, I know you like her, she is. The problem is you're too dumb to see it." 

"Cira, I don't know how many times I have to tell you it isn't like that." 

"She's using you for money. She's a druggie, once she-" 

"Cira," I cut her off in a serious tone. "Don't talk about shit you don't know." 

She looked like she was getting just as upset with me, "Then don't tell me to chill out, I'll act whatever way I want to, if you're to continue to cater to that whore," Then without saying anything else Cira got up and left to the bathroom; I'm sure to take her shower. 

What the fuck was wrong with her? I couldn't stand being in the room anymore so I got up and left to the living room. Right now everyone was pretty much settling down for the night, too, Bella and Furlan had their on the room, while Mikasa my mom and F/n shared the other. The whole way the place was set up was like a house. It was nice, for now, it was quite too, I wonder if anyone heard Cira just now. God, I hope not. 

 

I was sitting outside looking at the view from the balcony. And it was beautiful. It was one of my favorite things there was out here. Most of the time Cira and I will come out here when we want to relax, I figured this be a nice privet place for F/n to do the same. But how can she if Cira is being this way.

Seriously what the fuck is wrong with her?

I told her not to repeat the stuff I've told her about F/n. And If F/n finds out I told her, I just know what will be bad. She'll think she can't trust me. And who knows what type of shit that will cause. I ran my figures through my hair. All I want to do is protect F/n and keep her safe. That's all I ever wanted to do, but I keep fucking it up. How am I supposed to help her? I don't know when her next withdraw will be. I can only pray she doesn't have one while we're out here. 

I shook my head, she's been doing fine. She should be doing good but still...What else do I need to do to help her? I know I can't keep her locked away in the house, I'd be no better than that bastard. But how can I know she's okay?

"Care for some company?" 

I turned and looked to the door, and it was F/n. speck of the devil I guess. "Hey," was all I said.

"Oh, why the long face?" She asked walking closer to me and sat down, "Well, I should say why the longer face, you're always pouting Levi." 

"Tch, am not." 

"Are too." 

"Why do you like arguing all the time?" 

She chuckled a bit, "I don't but you're always wrong, and I have to correct you," 

"Tsk, whatever," I rolled my eyes.

We both went quiet, lost in our own thoughts looking at the night sky. After a moment, F/n laid her head on my shoulder, "I had a really nice day Levi it was fun." 

"Me too." 

"Thank you." 

"Anything for you," I told her, but just as the words came out F/n suddenly nodded over. I looked over as much as I could to find she fell asleep. I hope tomorrow is good for her too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!!
> 
> Next chapter should be fun. We'll see how it goes.
> 
> Pretty please leave a comment telling me what you thought about the chapter or the story I'd really like to know~
> 
> As always you all are the best, see you in the next chapter 
> 
> xoxo


	47. Chapter 47

Your Pov

I woke up with the sound of laughter. 

I was trying to adjust to the sun in my eyes, only to look up and see Mikasa and Kuchel looking at me laughing. What was with them? I started to move only to see Levi stretching next to me. Then I realized we must have fallen asleep out here last night. Great. Just what I needed. 

"And the two of you say nothing is going on." Mikasa laughed walking away.

Kuchel snorted at us, "You to get up, we're getting ready to go eat breakfast." Then she walked away.

I yawned looking at Levi, "Sorry, for having you out here. Why didn't you wake me up? I don't even remember falling asleep." 

Levi groaned, "Yeah, you must have been pretty tired, cause you went out pretty fast. And I didn't want to wake you up." 

I sighed standing up still looking at him, "You should have woke me up. What if Cira saw us like that? She'd have a cow and that's the last thing I want to deal with right now."

"Well, I did see the two of you actually." 

Levi and I both looked at the door to see Cira standing there. Shit. I shook my head, "Hey Cira, I fell asleep I didn't-

Cira put her hand up at me smiled and walked closer to me she shook her head, "It's fine. I should be the one apologizing." 

Wait, what?

Cira took my head, "I've been rude and mean to you since we've met and it's not right. You're one of Levi's friends. If he cares about you I should care." 

I just stared at her. Where was this coming from? I quickly shook my head, "Um...It's fine. And I get it I'm a stranger and you don't know me, but I promise I won't be there much longer." 

Cira laughed, "It's fine really, stay however long you need. You're like Levi's family too. I should support him any way I can and that means supporting you too." I just looked her over. This was a whole one-eighty from the way she's been. What the hell has gotten into her? But I guess I can't complain. After all, she does have good reason not to like me if I look at her side of things I really am a stranger in her house hanging around her boyfriend.

"Seriously it's fine, Anyway I just heard everyone was getting up for breakfast so I was coming to wake up Levi, and you." 

"I'll be there in a minute," Levi finally spoke up. 

Cira just looked back at him and smiled, "Alright, I'm going to get ready, don't take to long." Then she walked off.

I turned to Levi, "What did you put into her drink?" 

"Tsk, No clue." 

I just shook my head at him, "You family really does have her all wrong she's a sweet girl anyone could understand why she comes off so snappy sometimes, you just have to take a step back and see things from her side, anyway-" 

"What's this about you trying to move out as soon as you can?" Levi cut me off and asked. 

"Huh?" 

"What you just told CIra, You don't have to rush out. You know you can stay," 

"Levi, I cannot stay with you forever." 

"But you don't have to worry about leaving anytime soon." 

"Levi, I can not just bunk in with you, you have a life and I can't just keep butting in you should already know that." 

"I've told you-you're not a problem, even Cira just said she doesn't mind you staying-" 

"I'm not going to stay longer than I need Levi!" I told him getting frustrated, "Look-" I took a moment to calm down I don't need to start a scene with him. "Levi, I don't want to talk about this right now." Then I started to walk off back into the room with Mikasa and Kuchel. 

Levi can be just so stupid sometimes. Why on earth would I want to stay with him? I mean Yes, I wouldn't want anything more than to stay with him, but It's not the fucking same thing as it was when we were kids. He had a life, a girlfriend and a career. I can't come into his life and just throw things off track the way they were. Is that really that hard to see? Not to mention; I don't want to stay in a house with him and his girlfriend. I don't want to be reminded of what could have been every time I see them together it's hard enough as it is; I can't do that for the rest of my life! What's wrong with him? And what if they do get married? Then what? He can't take care of me forever. He's treating me like a child and I'm not.

Is this just how he sees me though? That I can't take care of myself without him? Because when I do, I find myself in shitty situations like with Samuel? I shook my head, this is all my fucking fault. If I had just listened and left him alone...Everyone had told me too...

Once I got into the room I saw Mikasa and Kuchel just sitting on the bed. They both turned to look at me, and they both smiled and talked to chuckle, making me remember how they saw Levi and me sleeping. Shit. They are going to drag this out I just know it. 

"So," Kuchel just started, "Just friends?" 

"Nothing more she says," Mikasa jokes.

"Okay, I fell asleep on his shoulder outside. Nothing more, nothing less," I told them.

"Surrrre," Mikasa rolled her eyes.

"Okay, miss just friend," Kuchel start, "riddle me this one. What's with those sexy pictures of the two of you that are all over the internet? I forgot to mention them yesterday, but now that we have a moment I wanna know?" 

Fuck, how did I forget about those? "It wasn't even a big deal," I told them but they just stared at me. "The girl he was supposed to take the pictures with hurt herself and had to go to the hospital, and then they asked me to step in and I did, nothing more, nothing less." 

"MmHmm," Kuchel looked me up and down.

"What?" I asked trying not to laugh at her for how she was acting. "It wasn't anything besides Levi has a girlfriend. You both do remember that he's not even interested in me. We've moved past all that. You guys should too. We both adults who liked each other when we were younger but now we are older and things change. The two of you have to see that." I told them. Part of me was getting annoyed. I know I want to be with Levi, I'm still in love with him. That has never changed after all these years, but when it comes down to the truth why would he want me back? I'm damaged goods. If he knew all the things that I've been through I doubt he'd even want to touch me again. So to keep hearing how they think I have a chance it just pushing an open wound. 

"Tch, his girlfriend doesn't count. If you think he'll stay with her long now that you're in the picture you really are clueless," Mikasa rolled her eyes. 

"She's a nice person you guys just have to give her a chance." 

"As if," Mikasa rolled her eyes. 

"Listen, I get it. She can be a bit bitchy, but have you guys thought of why? Maybe it's because you've been attacking her? She can be nice she just apologized to me so it's not like she can't she just feels attacked by everyone." 

"Riiight," Mikasa laughed.

I sighed, "What's so bad about her anyway?" I asked them. Maybe if I knew what they hated about her so much I could help a bit. 

Kuchel shook her head, "Believe me F/n, We've tried but she's not an easy person to get along with, but after a while, we just gave up. She's a bad influence on Levi, She's bratty had a bad attitude. She can be manipulative and rude. I just don't like her." 

"But can't you get past those things for Levi's sake? He's a smart man, Kuchel you raised him. And if he really does love her can't you try harder is all I'm saying. For him at least. And think about it. Nobody is perfect. Mikasa has an attitude problem and we all know Levi is like the most bratty person ever," I told her straight up laughing. "We all have our flaws," I told her. 

Kuchel just smiled at me, "When did you get so smart?" 

I shrugged, "Trust me, I'm the same dumb girl I've always been." At least according to Levi. 

Kuchel got up and hugged me out of nowhere, "I have to disagree, you've grown into a beautiful smart young lady." She pulled back and looked at me and I saw the tears in her eyes, "I'm sorry, you just reminded me of your mother just then...and all I could think about is how I should have been there to watch you grow. I should have known better." 

"Oh, no Kuchel do not feel bad about that," I quickly told her. "It was my choice." 

She shook her head, "But you were just a child." 

I shook my head back, if she keeps this up I'll start crying and I don't want to do that, "Seriously it's fine, You all are perfect. It was my choice to stay, and I'm fine If you want to do something for me just treat Cira a little better." I mustered up a smile, "I'm going to go and get in the shower, I'll meet the rest of you in the lobby okay." I hugged her back and then hurried and got my things to go into the shower. 

I closed the door behind me and leaned against the door. I can't do that. Because If I go crying with Kuchel I might let it slip what was really going on, all that shit with Samuel. And I can't let her know the truth. It would break her heart and I can't do that. Kuchel is like a mother to me, so I can't let her find out. Years I would wonder what would my mom think of me if she knew how far I had fallen. I could only imagine the shame, and to put Kuchel through that would be one of the worst things I could do. So I can't tell her, she and Mikasa can't know what was going on. 

I started to cry. This was becoming so stressful so fast. We're supposed to be having a good time, but right now all I can think about is not having Kuchel find out about my past. Seeing Levi with Cira, and me who just doesn't belong. Thank god, only Levi knows... I can trust him not to say anything.

Wait- Furlan...Oh My Gosh! he was there! How could I be so stupid? Furlan was there when Levi got me from Samuel...Furlan knows! I didn't even think of it till now? What if he's already told them? What if they already know and that's why Kuchel had hugged me and started crying? What if Cira knew and she only apologized to me because she felt guilty and pitied me? What if they all knew and was really laughing about it? Thinking how stupid I was for staying with Samuel? For not running for living that life. For being a whore? What if Levi told them anyway. He wouldn't though. Levi wouldn't. 

All of a sudden everything seemed to be getting hotter and I couldn' breath... I was getting so itchy. I needed it. I bit my lip. I was having a fucking withdraw. It was feeling like my blood was rushing through my body. Why? Why out of all times? I was doing so fine. And now I'm going to ruin everything. And Levi's not even here. He's with his family. And I'm here alone.

Levi Pov

F/n sure was taking her sweet time. 

Right now we were all sitting in the living room waiting for her before we go down. 

I looked over at all of them and saw Bella talking to Cira, and Cira was actually talking back. I asked what had gotten into her and she just said she thought about it last night and if she wants to be something in my life she realized she has to get used to the other woman in my life. Which is some real growth from her. Nothing too big, but it's nice to see she's trying I guess. Maybe something from F/n rubbed off on her. 

And maybe it rubbed off on mom and Mikasa too. Because they both just got in on the conversation she was having with Bella and it doesn't look like they going to try and bite each other heads off. I laughed to myself, F/n is a pretty good influence on people. Her attitude had always been a bit contagious.

"What's taking her so long?" Furlan asked me. 

I shrugged, "How should I know?" She was fine when she walked off this morning. Too fine if you asked me. I just can't get it. Why won't she let me help her? She doesn't have to worry about anything anymore? I'm rich I can take care of her and she doesn't have a thing to worry about anymore, but she wants to leave. I get that's she been with that bastard all this time and wants to live life, I have no problem with that, but why does it feel like she's in such a rush to leave me...Does she truly hate me that much? And if so is there anything I could do to make her change her mind?

"You sure she's alright though? She hasn't been having issues?" Furlan suggested. 

I snapped my head and him, but not before making sure the girls weren't looking our way. "Don't mention that right now, I'm sure she's fine." I glared at him. 

"They still don't know?" Furlan looked at me like he was annoyed. 

"I said she's fine," I told him in a harsh whisper. I'm sure she was she's been good for a few days now, why wouldn't she now?

Furlan was about to say something else but Just then my phone vibrated, I took it out to see it was from F/n,

-Help

Shit. 

I groaned rubbing my face, what the fuck? Was something really wrong? And even if it is how the hell am I supposed to help her without them all finding something out? shit. Levi think, come on, think.

"Oi, how about you guys go make sure we got some good seat downstairs let me and Furlan wait up here." 

"Oh, "I'm sure she won't be much longer." My mom spoke up. 

"Yeah, but again who knows," 

"I'll go check on her," Bella got up.

"It will be better if you guys just get us some seats, who knows how crowded it will be, I'd just get going." I tried to steer them away.

"You know Levi does have a point," Cira agreed with me. 

"I don't want to leave without-" Miksas started to say back but my mom nudged her in the side. 

"You guys make a good point, we'll head down," My mom said and they all started to walk out. 

Just when they walked out Furlan started to speak, "Okay, we're along why haven't you told them yet." 

But I had already turned him out and went to the F/n's room. I opened the door and saw she wasn't in there. But the bathroom door was closed. I hurried to it, thank, God it was open. But when I looked in I saw F/n wrapped in a towel laying on the floor. Shit. 

I got down beside her, she was breathing pretty heavy. "F/n? F/n? Talk to me what's wrong?" I asked her trying to get an answer. She didn't feel like she had a fever or anything so that was good if anything she felt cold. I looked around and I could tell she had got in a shower already she was wet still like she took a cold shower. 

"Levi, I'm fine," She said out of breath.

"Like hell you are, Why didn't you text me earlier," I have no idea how long she's been like this. I picked her up and brought her back into the room and laid her down.

"Shit is she alright?" I heard Furlan asked, shit, I forgot he was still in here. 

"Just give me a sec," I told him.

"Levi, you can't take care of her yourself, let me go get some help,"

"No," I snapped at him, "I got this." 

"Look at her she looks out of it, Levi this is ridiculous," Furlan pointed at her and started to walk off. 

I couldn't let them find out like this, not to mention F/n doesn't want them knowing. "I'll be right back," I told F/n quickly and ran over and grabbed Furlan. "Stop it, I said it's fine, I have this under control." 

"You do not." He snapped back, "If you did she wouldn't be laid out on the bed like that!" 

"Would you calm down," I told him. "I know it's shitty, but when it comes down to I'm all she has, I will not abandon her, she doesn't want them to know and if you get something they'll find out. Now I know it isn't ideal, but that what's going on right now. She'll tell them someday, but not like this. She's been through enough and too much had happened to her because of what someone else said, she gets to do this on her own terms." 

Somehow that seemed to clam down Furlan. He rolled his eyes at me, "It needs to be soon. They shouldn't be out the loop like this. It's not right." 

"Just give her time." I looked back to her door, I agreed with him, but I know it's not that simple, "Just stay out here I'll be out in a sec," Then I walked back to her only to see she was laying down crying. 

Hurried to her side, "What's wrong?" 

"I'm ruining everything," She cried, "We were supposed to be having fun...And now look at me." 

I rubbed her hair, shushing her, "You didn't ruin anything, tell me how are you feeling?" 

She kept sniffing, "I'm just so tired, and scared Levi. Kuchel and Mikasa already know they hate me," 

I shook my head at her, "No they don't no one told them. I didn't tell them-" 

"But Furlan-"

"Won't tell them anything either," 

"But he knows, he was there when you got me," She cried. 

"Have I ever lied to you F/n? No one knows Everything is alright." 

She seemed to be thinking about it. I sighed, "I'll tell them you didn't feel well, and keep them downstairs all day if I have too, no one will know till you're ready to tell them." 

"Promise?" 

"I promise." 

F/n seemed satisfied with that. So after a moment, I helped her get some clothes on and back into the bed, "Text me if you need anything." I told her.

"I will," She said in a small voice. I could tell she was feeling bad more mentally than physically. her body must be tired though too. This was all so complicated. In a perfect world she would only sleep a few hours, but usually, F/n can sleep for days. I hope this isn't one of those times. I don't know how I could hide it from them at that point. 

I walked out to see Furlan sitting down still waiting, "She alright?" 

"Yeah, all things considered, she seemed better than the other times we've been through this, but it's still up in the air," 

"If we stay up here any longer someone is going to come back." 

"I know, so we're going down," I said going to the door.

"You're just going to leave her?" 

"She's well enough to text, if anything is wrong she'll tell me and I'll be on my way up." 

"This is some fine shit you've got yourself into you know Levi," Furlan rolled his eyes getting up and walking out with me.

"I know," 

I knew too well.

Your Pov

I don't know what time it is. I can see it's dark outside, so I know it's late I suppose I could look at my phone, but I didn't want to. I didn't want to see all the time I've waisted in this bed today, I actually feel better, at least my body does. Mentally I'm not so sure. 

I can't believe I'm ruining the trip like this. Everyone was so excited about this and here I am in bed, or maybe it's better this way? At least here I can be out of the way. Who needs the third will? Mikasa has her mother, Bella had Furlan and Levi has Cira, the perfect trip. There is no odd one out with me up here. 

It's better this way, It would have been better if I never came back. 

Just then I could head footsteps outside the door. Where they back? Just as I thought that someone walked into the run turning on the light, "F/n you're up!" 

I squinted looking at the person, it was Bella, I swear she has no tac, "I am, actually." I told her sitting up and putting on a smile. 

"Goody, you can hit this next bar with us," Mikasa said walking in and threw herself next to my feet on the bed, "Levi said you had diarrhea, Feel any better?" 

I shook my head, of course, he said that "Er, yeah I do." 

"You know they say with old age comes all sorts of problems, but I think it's a bit early for you to have these problems F/n" Kuchel laughed walking in. 

I shrugged, "It might have been something I ate yesterday." 

"Sounds about right," Bella added, "But anyway, we're all about to go back down to some bars and to karaoke wanna go? You do feel better? Feel like singing a bit? You know Big bro's always been I love with your voice, that might just win you him back."

"Bella," Kuchel said in a warning tone, "We agreed to be nice."

I raised my eyebrow at her. 

Kuchel sighed, "We're listening too you and have been nice to Cira today." 

I smiled, I guess that was good news, "And?" 

"And she's not that bad all the time I guess," Mikasa huffed, "But that doesn't mean I like her or anything, she just acted right for today" 

"Well, I'm happy you guys are trying."

"Anyway, are you going with us or not?" Mikasa asked.

"You guys don't want me down there, after all, I have diarrhea," I rolled my eyes. I swear it's always something stupid with him.

They started to laugh, "As long as you don't shit on the stage I think will be good," Mikasa laughed.

"Come on F/n," Bella whined now, "It won't be fun if you're not there." 

I sighed, I don't think I have much of a choice. "FIne"

~.~.~.~.

It didn't take me long to get ready. And after a while we all headed down I got a few glares from Levi who know doubt was angry with me because all while they were down at the pool and stuff today he had been texting me, but I hadn't answered anything. And then I just popped up to karaoke. If I was him I'd be a bit upset with me too, but I couldn't exactly say anything to him right now because Cira was all over him.

Not that it was any of my business or place. But she was all over him, laughing and whispering in his ear, it reminded me of the first night I stayed with them, how she acted then but now it was just a bit much maybe it was that top? It was seen through and well she gave us a lot to see. I guess when you have a body like that you wouldn't have a reason to hide it. But again that's none of my business.

Right now we were all sitting at a bar table watching Bella and Furlan do a duet together. There were adorable. Watching them sing together on the stage I can see they didn't change that much from when they were younger. It's cute. I wish I had that with someone...I looked at Levi but then I noticed Cira practically in his lap and quickly turned my head. why was she acting this way? I shook my head to myself, maybe she's drunk. Either way I shouldn't care.

"F/n! you're going next what do you want to sing?" Kuchel laughed while drinking. 

"Oh I'm not ready," I laughed her off. I was having fun seeing everyone else have fun.

"Oh come off it, get a drink, sing!" Mikasa told me. 

I shook my head, "Somebody has to stay sober," I told them. In truth, I'm not trying to drink, I'm trying to get clean and something tells me turning to alcohol isn't going to help.

"Suit your self," She said drinking.

"Oh, F/n I wish you could have been down there with us today you would have had so much fun," CIia told me starting a conversation.

I smiled, "Yeah, me too." 

"Levi dunked me into the water and I almost killed him. Sometimes I forget he's so strong," She laughed. 

"Yeah, sounds like something Levi would do." 

"And Kuchel and I went shopping for a bit, we had so much fun didn't we?" 

Kuchel smiled at her, "Yes, we did sweetie." 

"Okay, who's got the next song?" Bella asked sitting back down with Furlan. "F/n?" 

"Oh, no" I shook my head. 

"I'll go," Cira jumped up. 

We all cheered her on as she walked to the stage. I was grateful she got up. I didn't want to be mean but I didn't want to hear her talk about how great of a day they had without me. It only made me feel worse about myself. 

"Oh isn't that classy," I heard Mikasa under her breath.

"Huh?" 

Mikasa pointed at Cira, "Her song choice." 

I looked at saw she picked don't cha my the pussycat dolls. I snorted to myself. Yeah, like Mikasa said, classy. as I watched her sing I couldn't help but wonder does she feel threated by me? But why she had Levi...Levi doesn't want me. Why would he? Not when he has her. I loke back at her, she was perfect, why would he want me with all my issues. He could do so much better. He was doing so much better. 

"I'll be right back," I told them getting up, "I'm going to the bathroom." 

"Don't blow it up!" Bella joked. 

I just sighed, I'm going to be hearing poop jokes for weeks. 

I walked in the bathroom only to put some water on my face, I needed just a quick second to myself. If I take any longer they'll think I'm in here shitting. I looked at myself in the mirror, I looked okay...nothing special but okay...still no match for Cira...and why would I? I have too many issues to be wondering if I could ever have anything with Levi again. I walked out of the bathroom only to see Levi leaning against the wall.

"Everything okay?" I asked him.

"Tsk, I should be asking you that. you scared me today, how are you feeling?" 

"I'm fine, Levi. I'm sorry I didn't answer your text earlier." 

"It's fine. I figured you were asleep or something, I'm just happy to know you're doing okay, you sure right?"

I mustered up a smile, "Yeah, I'm good." 

"You know I know when you're lying to me F/n." 

"I..I'm not lying." 

"You are," Levi walked closer to me, "If you need to go back and lay down go," 

"Seriously I feel fine it's just some things I've been thinking about that have me in my thoughts and I'm just a bit spaced out, nothing to worry about." 

Suddenly Levi hugged me taking me off guard, "I can't help but worry about you, cause when I don't something bad happens. So I'm always going to worry about you F/n. Get that through your stubborn head." 

I hugged him back tighter, in a way I think this was what I needed to just be close to him, "I know, and I'm sorry," 

Levi pulled back to look at him with his arms still holding me, "Don't be sorry." 

"Levi where did you go that song was for you-" Cira walked back to see Levi and I standing there. 

I quickly let go of Levi, shit. It did not look good just then. 

But Cira just smiled, "I was singing to you Levi, you walked off," 

"My bad, the next song maybe," he told her and I saw she hadn't made eye contact with her, and just walked off. 

I guess that a good cue to follow on, But I can't have her feeling like we were doing something bad. "It wasn't what it looked like I get that's a cliche but-" 

But before I could finish talking CIra grabbed my arms with her nails dug into my skin, I was about to tell her to stop but I could see how angry she looked.

"Eggshells. You're walking on them sister," Then she stormed off. 

I sighed, This is not looking good for me. 

I walked back to the table and everyone was laughing I sat down quietly like she just said eggshells, I don't know what she'll do but I'm not trying to find out. 

"Come one f/n sing a song!" Bella yelled, "Sing! Sing! Sing!" 

"Or just take a sip," Kuchel said sliding her drink to me, "It takes the edge off." 

I could tell they were all a bit tipsy. But I shook my head, "I don't think so." 

"I'm picking a song for you," Mikasa got up.

"Okay, now take a shot!" Bella laughed.

"I'll sing but I won't drink okay," I told them.

"Oh? Why won't you drink?" Cira asked sitting back down.

I looked her over I guess he's going to act nice here, "I just think someone should be sober." I told her. 

"It's not like we're driving, take a shot." 

I smiled, "I'm good. I'll sing though." 

"It's more fun if you drink." 

"She said she didn't want a drink Cira," Levi spoke up.

"I didn't ask you." She snapped at him.

"Got you're song F/n!" Mikasa said handing me the mic, "Not get your pretty ass up their and sing." 

I shook my head laughing to myself. Mikasa had great timing there, But then I looked at the song she had for me to sing, She is such an annoying little sister, I swear. She picked still into you by Paramore. How ironic. 

It wasn't like I couldn't sing then it would be awkward, so I took a deep breath and womaned up and sung the song. And I'll be honest singing is still so much fun to me. Maybe a little bit more fun then it used to be. I wasn't singing because I was sad and with Samuel. I was singing for fun and with family. And not to mention I don't know these lyrics kinda hit home.

The song was over and soon as it started it felt like and I got off stage only to here the whole place clapping. I couldn't help but laugh it was always a nice feeling when this happened. But I shook my head part of me really hated all this attention us much as I liked it. "It wasn't that deep," I told them sitting down.

"What are you saying you have a voice of an angel," Kuchel said, "You know your mom could sing a bit, I bet you got it from her." 

"Yeah, that was amazing just like when we found you back home," Furlan said.

I almost seemed to freeze, But he didn't say anything else. He must have realized it too. Levi said he wouldn't say anything. But as I looked around everyone the didn't seem to be paying much attention. 

"What do you mean?" Cira asked out of nowhere.

"Huh?" Furlan asked.

"Where'd you find F/n?" She asked.

Furlan shrugged, "Just some bar back home she was singing and bartending there," He lied. And I let go of the breath I was holding. I knew I could count on him. I shouldn't doubt Levi. 

"Oh? Bartending?" Kuchel asked, "That sounds fun."

"It is. pays well." I lied. I hated lying to her but if she knew what I really was doing she'd hate me.

"I bet it does," Cira said, "Now that you've mentioned it I don't know much about you F/n. What else were you doing back in Levi's home town." 

I shook my head quickly, "Nothing really." I need to get this conversation off me. 

"Bella you gonna go again?" Levi asked.

"Ooo yeah, Mikasa lets-" 

"Wait were talking about F/n right now, don't you guys wanna catch up," Cira laughed. 

Shit. It was like she was trying to put me in a corner, "It's not much to tell, I haven't done anything worth talking about." 

"I'm sure you have some stories or something." 

"I don't." 

"Nothing at all?" Cira asked.

"Nope," I said popping the P.

"Give it a rest Cira," Levi stepped in. 

"I'm trying to be nice, all I ask if you would stop catering to her." Cira snapped at him.

"I'm not catering to her," Levi said.

"Okay, you guys let all calm down," Kuchel tried to step in but Cira stood up. "You are catering too you and you know it, I think you should stop. As a matter of fact, If I'm being honest, I'm tired of her!" 

"Clam down Cira!" Levi yelled at her.

But she looked like she was getting more and angrier, I have no idea where this is going, but it's my fault, I'm ruing everything again. "You'll bend over backward for her and you know it. And if you say you won't then prove it to me by kicking her or send her out whatever hell hole she crawled out of." 

"You know I'm not going to do that Cira, now will you sit back down? You're making a scene." 

And he was right everyone seemed to be watching us. I should step in, "I'm sorry Cira I didn't mean-" 

"You shut up you whore," She snapped at me.

"Hole on that is uncalled for!" Mikasa jumped up to my defense, "You need to chill out, be-" 

"It's not like I'm lying," Cira cut her off, then she looked to Levi, "Let me guess they don't know right? Because you fucking cater to the whore and you're too fucking dumb to see she's using you." She spat at him.

Levi stood up, "You're taking this too far." 

"Oh, you haven't seen too far," Cira, turned to us all again and started to walk over to me, "The reason she won't tell you anything about what she was doing when she was gone for five years because she was too busy getting pimpped out and drugged out. Shit, I bet that's why she wasn't with us all day. She's been growing through withdraws and using Levi's money since she got here-" 

I don't know what came over me but before she could say anything else I slapped her.

I don't know what I was feeling rage? Sadness? It was so much going on in my head I bearly knew was to start. But Cira glared back at me, "How dare you." That's all I could say. How could she say that? "How could you ever think I'd used Levi that way." I was still in love with him. I would never use Levi. I was a lot of things but I wasn't that type of person. "How dare you..." 

"F/n..." Levi called my name. And him...Levi...He told her. He told me he didn't tell anyone. He lied. He lied to me. I looked at everyone at the table they were all looking at me shocked Kuchel's had over her mouth. Everyone in the bar was looking at me. It was too much so I ran out. 

I couldn't believe this is how they found out. They would hate me. I won't have anyone anymore. 

Not even Levi. 

Because he lied to me. He said- no he promised. 

I had no one now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!!
> 
> Wow, that was a long chapter to write, I am so sorry it took so long to come out, but because it took 5ever to write and I went on that stupid 2-month hiatus I made sure to make to extra long and have a good pay off for you guys ~ (if you think Kuchel and Mikasa finding out what happened to pay off)
> 
> Anyways, I really hoped you all enjoyed this chapter! I really want to hear your predictions for the story I always find them interesting and fun to read, or any feedback I love reading whatever you all say about this story, and honestly part of why I still write is for you guys because you really make my day and it's nice seriously over that little hiatus I was having a hard time coming back to this story especially with everything that was going on in my life but because of you guys and how supportive you all or over my writing really made me want to come back because I know one thing we all might have in common is knowing the dread of starting a good fic and finding out it not done and I'd hate to do that with you all because you all truly are the best <3
> 
> anyways again TLDR I love you guys and I hope you leave a comment. Lol
> 
> I'm off to bed now ~~it is 5am I have to be at work at 10am Yay me! 
> 
> Xoxo


	48. Chapter 48

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **WARNING**  
> This chapter does have a Mention of a sexual abuses moment in it. If it's not for you or you're triggered by it please skip this chapter this has been your WARNING!!

Levi Pov

"What the fuck is wrong with you?" I glared at Cira. That was too far. She had no right. I knew she could be obnoxious but I never thought she'd take it that far. It was uncalled for F/n didn't even do anything to her.

"What's wrong with me? You brought her to my house who knows what type of disease she has! But do you care? No, I told them for your own good, you need to dump her out like yesterdays trash." 

"I can't fucking believe you," I was so angry, why would she do this? I rubbed my face This was it, "It's over." 

"What?" 

"I'm done Cira," I walked out of the bar and looked around. Shit. I should have known better than to hope F/n didn't run far. I couldn't see her anywhere. Suddenly I felt my arm jerk back. It was Cira pulling at me. 

"You are not leaving me for her!" She yelled. 

"Levi, what is going on?" I looked back and saw my mother looking at us. "What is she talking about what happened to F/n?" 

I sighed, I didn't want to do this, but Mikasa ran out with Bella, "What's going on? What is Cira talking about Levi?" 

They were all looking at me for an answer. "We can't do this here." No doubt everyone inside heard Cira 

"I want to know now Levi," Mikasa demanded. 

"Let's just get back into the room." 

"Okay, but someone needs to get F/n. Where did she go." My mom spoke up. 

I shook my head, "Leave her alone." No doubt she needed a moment to herself. Plus I know I'm the last one she wants to see, I fucking lied to her.

"Someone needs to explain something Levi," My mom said in a serious tone. 

"Let's just get back to the room." 

I went back in to pay for our stuff. Once we got back to the room Cira stormed off into the room we were sharing. I don't care what's she's doing in there either, if she's smart it would be packing everything up. But out in the kitchen, I leaned against the bar counter, my mom Mikasa, Bella and Furlan looking at me for some answers. I really don't want to do this, but I can't avoid it anymore, and especially not now. 

"She wasn't in a good place, mom." 

"Levi, whatever was going on, I won't judge you or her, but I need to know what happened," My mom said. 

I sighed, "The long story short is-" Just thinking about it hurt so bad. She didn't deserve it. Everything in her life just keeps getting fucked up and it's my fault.

"Levi," My mom said my name putting her hand over mine, but I snatched away. I didn't deserve that. 

"Nothing can be that bad-" Mikasa started to say but I cut her off.

"That bastard fucking raped her!" I snapped at them. I didn't want to think about it. It hurt like hell to know someone you love had to go through something so terrible. "He did that and made her stay with him...She thought she was protecting us by leaving. That's why she left. She didn't want to stay there. She wanted to go with us, but I was so fucking dumb." 

I heard them say something but I was in my own thoughts, "I was too fucking dumb to see that she was lying that day she left and let him ruin her life!" It was so overwhelming opening up to them I couldn't help but cry. I was supposed to protect her, from all this shit. And here I was still doing a shitty job. I Let Cira hurt her. No wonder she ran out. How could she ever trust me? 

I felt my moms arms wrap around me, "It's okay, you didn't know, you didn't do anything wrong." 

She tried to hold on to me, but I didn't want this. I didn't deserve this. "He made her sell her body mom, He got her on drugs. She's a mess. I let this happen. I told (Mom's name) I would protect her and I didn't I lied. I'm no better than him." 

"That's not true, that's not true," Was all she kept saying to me. But I knew it was. 

After a moment I pulled away from her, I needed to pull myself together, I had been keeping that in for too long. And this was just a pushing moment. What the fuck have our lives became? 

"How'd you find her?" Bella spoke up.

"Furlan and I found her singing in a bar, But she didn't want to talk to me, then I did some snooping around and found her, and where he had her," I shook my head, "I couldn't leave her once I knew what happened. She was terrified when I got her, though he was going to kill her and me. Five years. Five years she had to live like that while we stayed out here." 

"I knew we shouldn't have left her. I told you. I told both of you!" Mikasa got up yelling at me and my mom with tears in her eyes. 

She was right. We-I should have listened. 

"Wait, you knew?" Bella asked Furlan. 

"I knew she was in a bad place, but I didn't know all the details," He answered in a small voice.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Mikasa shook her head. She turned back to me, "You should have told us sooner than this. We had a right to know what happened to her, We could have helped!" 

"It wasn't that easy, I wanted too but I couldn't she didn't want me to tell you guys." 

"Oh, but you could tell Cira?" She yelled. 

"That was different." 

"No it wasn't, you lied to us Levi, We could have been helping her, you don't know what you're doing. What the hell is wrong with you!" Mikasa was getting more and more angrier with me. 

"It wasn't that simple, I knew she would tell you guys, it was her choice!" 

"But you didn't have a problem telling Cira! You chose her over F/n and us." 

"That's not true-" 

Just then the door opened and it was F/n. 

I suddenly felt relieved. She was back. But she looked like she had been crying. "I'm so sorry," I told her walking to her but she put her hand out stopping me. 

"I'd just liked to go stop sleep if that's fine," She asked not looking at anyone. She only stared at the floor. Like a child ashamed and in trouble. 

I shook my head, "That's fine." 

And without saying anything else she went into the room and closed the door. 

No one said anything for a while, No one knew what to say. What do you do in this type of situation? None of us knew. 

"I think we all should just call it a night," My mom spoke up after a while. 

"How can anyone sleep knowing this?" Mikasa snapped back.

"Mikasa, blaming each other isn't going to help," Furlan told her.

"I'm not blaming you two, I'm blaming them." She pointed at me and my mom, "You didn't go back for her, you knew she just lost her mom, but you left! What were you thinking?" 

"Mikasa, she's in the next room lower your voice," I told her. I didn't want F/n hearing this. 

She shook her head angrily, but she did lower her voice, "And you Levi, Why didn't you fight harder for her?" 

I couldn't answer her, all I could feel was the shame of knowing what I did. If I could go back. I know I would do things differently. If I had just made one different choice none of this would have happened. 

Mikasa just glared at us, "I can't sit here with you," Then without saying anything else she stormed out of the sweat. This was so fucked. This wasn't what we came out here for. I looked to the door I knew Cira was in. This was her fault-no this was my fault. I should have left her when she first started acting like this with my mom and Mikasa, my dumb ass had to wait until she hurt F/n. 

Bella stood up, she seemed just as shaken up about the whole thing, but she wasn't as mad as Mikasa was, She mostly just cried with Furlan holding her hand, "Poor F/n. This- I would have never known." after a while, They both got up and went into their room leaving me and my mother standing beside each other. 

"I should find out where Mikasa went," I told her.

But she shook her head, "She needs time to let this process." 

"Tch, we all do." I sighed, "I know I fucked up mom-" 

"You didn't do anything wrong," My mom spoke up, "You- you both were just kids. She lost her mother. I don't know what I was thinking? I knew things would be different. I just wanted her to be okay. I felt like she thought if she stayed around us it would only remind her of the bad things in her life. That's why I didn't press on her leaving. I thought it was what she wanted. I didn't know anyway was making her, but I should have. F/n is like a daughter to me, and I left her to the world without any protection. That wasn't on you Levi." It was on me I was the adult." 

"I don't blame you," I told her. I didn't I only blamed myself. There was so much I should have done, I could have stopped all this but I didn't. 

"I need to talk to her," My mom stood up.

"Just leave her now, she feels ashamed, She thinks you'll hate her. You have to be gentle with her about this," I told her. I didn't want to hurt F/n anymore then I've already done tonight. 

"I know, all the more reason to talk to her." Then my mom went into the room with F/n closing the door behind her. 

I sighed again, this should be good. Maybe this will be the closure she needs. This was nowhere near ideal, but in the end F/n needs to know she'll still be accpected by them. My mom and Mikasa, hell even Isabel and Furlan wouldn't stop loving her over this. We only wanted to help her.

~.~.~.

Morning came and I didn't sleep all night. I only could wonder what they were all talking about? About four am Mikasa finally came back and went into the room. I don't even know if they did talk all I know was it was going on eleven now and no one has still said anything to me. 

I yawned rubbing my face, I just want to get home and put this all behind us, more than anything like F/n I just want us to move on with our lives, and this time without Cira. I don't need her in my life. I don't know why I've put up with her this long. We'll all ride back but once that's done it's over. I don't care how it will make me look. She's not a person I want to be with for the rest of my life, let alone the rest of the day. I can't believe she would hit F/n that low. 

I sat there thinking to myself and just as I was drifting off to sleep but I jumped up once I head a door opening. I looked at it to see F/n walking out.

Imidenltly sat up, "F/n? Is everything okay?" 

She nodded and sat beside me on the couch.

I didn't even know where to start apologizing to her, "You have to know the last thing I would ever want to do is hurt you," 

She just nodded. F/n pulled her feet in closer to her chest and hugged herself. I could tell she had been still crying. She looked so small, and helpless. I hated seeing her like this, but it was always my fault she was. 

"Levi," She finally spoke up after a while. 

"Yeah?" 

"You know I'd never use you right. I'm not that type of person. I won't use you. And if you feel like I do don't let me kick me out." 

I grabbed one of her hands and intertwined our fingers, "I won't give up on you." 

She started to cry and I pulled her into my arms, "I won't give up on you F/n, And I know, That's not the type of person you are, I know you wouldn't do that." And it was true. Cira could think whatever she wanted. But I knew the real F/n; the real caring, funny amazing F/n she was. 

"I won't let anything else bad happen to you," I don't know much how long I held on to F/n, but I knew I never wanted to let her ago. 

 

Your Pov

The ride back home was silent. 

Mostly what all needed to be said, Kuchel told me last night. 

She wasn't mad, so she says, she kept telling me how she blamed herself. But I never blamed them. They didn't make the dumb choice to talk to Samuel at that party. That was all me. But she insisted now that she'll do everything to help me. I have a checkup she's taking me too a few days from now. She says she wants to do better by me. 

They all do. 

Mikasa didn't say much when she got back only that she was sorry. 

But I don't want to keep healing sorry, I wanted to move on. I was doing so well, all up until yesterday morning. With that withdraw, and everything finding out, I was just exhausted, but I can't sleep. Even if there aren't mad at me all I can see is how they stared at me when Cira told them...I can't believe that's how they found out. I knew Cira too me rude, but I would have never thought she'd take it there. Moreover, I never thought Levi would have told her. 

But Kuchel said don't be so hard on Levi, I suppose it was a lot to tell him, and for Levi not to say anything would have been heard with a girlfriend in the house, how else would he had convinced her that I could stay without telling her the truth. But still...He lied to me. Levi always tells me how I can trust him, that's he's never lied to me. But last night told another story. I can only wonder what else he's lied about. 

But even then that didn't change how I truly feel about him. I just wanted him to know I wasn't trying to use him. I've seen those girls who would do anything for it. I didn't want to be one of them, And I won't be...And the thought that I would use him of al people, disgusted me. I would never. To take someones kindness and abuse is so wrong let alone Levi whos' but its whole life on stop for me. I couldn't be able to live with myself for doing something like that.

We got back home, Kuchel had driven me all the way back to Levi's house. Once I got out the care I could see Levi and Cira were both getting out the care. I thought back to last night. I slapped her. Guilty wash over me; even though what she did was wrong...she wasn't actually wrong for it. I shouldn't have put my hands on her. 

I started to get my things out of the care and Mikasa and Kuchel walked around started to help. I mustered up a smile, I didn't want their pity. "It's fine I got it." 

"I know you do," Kuchel said hugging me, I could hear the tears coming up in her voice, "You've been doing things on your own for so long, it's time to let us take care of you." 

I whipped a tear from my eye, "It's okay really." 

"Don't be a stranger," Miksas said hugging me out of nowhere. "I've always seen you as an older sister, I love you like you are. When you need anything call me, I'll always be there to help. Even if it's putting some sense into that idiot brother of mine," 

I hugged her back, "I will Mikasa," 

Kuchel hugged both of us, "It will get better, I promise F/n." 

We didn't say anything else we just stood there in this moment, but after a while, we pulled away. 

"We'll call when we get home," Kuchel said. 

I nodded and waved at them getting the rest of my things and going into the house.

As soon as I opened the door I heard yelling. 

"Get her out of my house!" Cira yelled.

"It's not your fucking house, You get out!" Levi yelled back.

"I made you, you can not dumb me for some trash! I won't accept it! What do you think your fans would say?" 

"I don't fucking care, I don't want you here get your shit and get out of here!" 

They went back and fouth; as I was walking to my room I could hear the sound of things crashing against the wall and breaking. The whole situation was honestly hitting too close to home for me. It made me think of my mom and dad when they would argue....

Suddenly the door opened and Cira walked out slamming it with a few dresses in her hands. Mascara all over her face, her usual perfect demeanor was gone. "Get the fuck out of my house," She said to me. 

I didn't know what to say. The last thing I wanted to do was ruin Levi's life, and here I was ruining his relationship with her. 

"Don't you talk to her life that!" Levi came out of the room behind her, "F/n ignore her," 

"I can not believe you, Levi, You'd' throw away your career for this whore?" 

"Don't talk to her like that, and stop acting like you're doing this for any reason other than your career. I don't need you, Cira. You need me." 

"You'd choose her over-" 

"I'll always choose her," Levi cut her off. "I'll choose F/n every time. You-no one comes close to what she means to me. So it will always be her. You'll never win."

I couldn't believe what I was hearing him say. Why would he say that to her? I'm not worth it. He knows that deep down. "Levi-" I started to say but Cira cut me off this time.

"Fine." 

She held on to then things in her arms a little tired, "I know when I've lost a fight." She looked me up and down. I was still dumbfounded, "You win."

Then without saying anything else, she stormed out of the house. 

I let go of the breath I was holding after I don't know how long, "Levi what is wrong with you? You can't leave her, she's your girlfriend." 

Levi frowned, "Do you here yourself? I'm not going to be with anyone who talks to you like she was," 

"No do you? Levi I am not worth all of this." I should have known better, there wasn't any way I could be back in their lives and not ruin anything, I've brought all this grief and guilt to Mikasa and Kuchel, and I'm destroying Levi's life. I only bring issues when I'm with them. I'd be better off back home with Samuel, at least there I wasn't in the way. 

"Would you stop that, you are." 

I could feel the tears forming in my eyes, "I'm not." 

"You are F/n you are still everything too me." 

I shook my head, he didn't mean it. Levi wasn't thinking straight. He never thought straight about things like this. I walked off, it was useless talking to him now, he won't listen. He called after me but I didn't answer him. I can't I love him too much. hearing him talk about me like that is just so-I shook my head. No. He only thinks that way because of his promise to my mom. They all do. 

I closed the door behind me and leaned against it. This was all too much, I need air. 

Levi knocked on the door, "F/n, Just answer me." 

"Leave me alone Levi, You're not listening to me. I know you're not thinking this through. Go back to Cira, you love her." 

"No I don't F/n," 

"You do-" 

"No I love you F/n," Levi spoke and it felt like the world stop. 

"F/n the only person I love is you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!!
> 
> So that was a lot, and things certainly are getting interesting. who knows what will happen next :)
> 
> Xoxo


	49. Chapter 49

Levi Pov

She never opened the door. 

I don't know what I was been thinking of telling her that. I was in the moment, I wasn't thinking of how'd she respond. It was just so much going through my mind. I had to tell her the truth I didn't care if she didn't feel the same way she needed to know how I felt about her. But I at least thought she'd say something, but she didn't say anything. I stood outside her door I don't know how long and nothing. So I gave up and went back into my room, and since then we haven't spoken about it at all.

And now she avoids me. When I go into a room she's in she finds a reason to leave. I tried to run with her the other morning but she didn't say anything the whole time. I don't know how to fix this, but the best thing I think I can do right now tries and act like I didn't say it. 

"You know you don't have a real reason to mope around," Mikasa said to me. 

She was over for the day, at least for now my mom had taken F/n out to the doctor and convinced Miksas to stay with me for the day. I haven't really talked to her since she left the resort that night she found out about F/n. Right now I stood in my kitchen with her it wasn't like there was anything for us to do. I know we need to talk I'm just not sure where to start without making it an argument. 

"She had more of a reason than anyone," She spoke up again 

"Don't you think I know that already," I snapped back at her. I don't know why I agreed to this, I know she's still upset about this. She has every right to be but still, I didn't need anyone reminding me how I fucked up, I was well aware of it.

Mikasa shook her head, "It's just still so hard to think about everything that happened to her..." 

I didn't say anything. She was right. It would never be something that I could wrap my head around. I don't think I even wanted too. "The only thing we can do is move on." I looked at Mikasa who seemed lost in her own thoughts, "She wants us to move on. F/n doesn't want to feel like she's a burden on us. That's the biggest thing for her right now, that's why I didn't tell you guys." 

"I get that, but it still wasn't right. This is was different from some stupid secret. This was really serious, and it just hurts to know you didn't think you could tell me, I mean I can get mom, but me...and then on top of that you told Cira." 

"It wasn't like I wanted to tell Cira," I told her, "She wouldn't have let F/n stayed if I didn't." 

Mikasa clicked her tongue at me, "It still wasn't right." 

"I know I fucked up Mikasa, I'm sorry." That's what I'm sure she needed to hear, "I'm still trying to figure this whole thing out myself. And I admit I was over my head not telling anyone else about it. I thought I could figure it out on my own but I needed help. F/n needed help. I was just so caught up in not abandoning her again I didn't take the time to see how the rest of you could really help," 

Mikasa didn't say anything to me for a moment, but then she chuckled a little, then shoved me a little, "You can be such an idiot sometimes," she sighed, "You both should know I'll help me and mom." 

"I know that now." 

She just hummed in response. 

"Do you think she's all right with mom at the doctor?" 

I nodded, "She's fine. She hasn't seemed sick with anything. I would have realized it by now." That I was sure of. If F/n was sick or if there was anything else wrong with her I would have saw the signs already, and as far as I've seen she's been healthy.

"I hope so, she doesn't need anything else bad going on in her life." 

"You got that right." 

"Speaking of things going wrong what's going to happen with you and Cira?" Mikasa asked moving to look into the fridge.

"Nothing, It's over." 

She turned back around with an apple in her hand, "That's it? You sure she's not going to mess up anything for you? Don't you have that movie you're about to star in?" 

"She doesn't have anything to do with my career did she make me a bit more popular yeah, But I don't need her, I never did she needed me more." 

"Tch, someone's on a high horse." 

I rolled my eyes, but it was true. I always knew it help out to be with Cira, it made me more noticeable to producers. But that wasn't the only reason I stayed with her, despite the way she acted she was fun to be around at times. But she was a problem I won't act like she wasn't. And then the way she told them about F/n, I just couldn't take it anymore. She couldn't do that and get away with it. Plus it just wasn't the same anymore...not with F/n back into the picture. 

"So what are you going to do now?" 

I frowned, I didn't know what she was getting at.

"Now, that Cira is out the picture are you going to tell F/n the truth? How you really feel? And save me the whole we're just friends bit. I've heard it from her enough plus we all know that's played out. You and F/n belong together, despite everything that's happened you've found each other again, that's got to mean something." 

"She told you we're just friends?" 

"Yeah, but I don't believe her for a second," she said taking a bite of her apple.

I wonder if there's any truth to that. I mean when she asked me a while back what were we I told her she was my best friend still, and it was true. I just wished it was still more than that. "That's not important." 

"So you admit, you still have feelings for her?" Mikasa asked smiling.

"It's not that easy?

"Why not? You just have to tell her the truth. I'm sure that might even make her happy." 

"I doubt it," I told her.

"How would you know unless you-Wait did you already tell her?" She asked me.

"It doesn't matter," I didn't want to think about it anymore, "There are a million reasons why I'm not right for her besides I'm sure she doesn't see me like that." 

"Levi this is F/n you're talking about she will always love you." 

"Things change, and why would she? If I haven't have left her she'd have a better life, if I was in her shoes I'd hate me." 

Mikasa shook her head, "How can you be so dumb?" 

"I don't want to talk about this anymore," I was about to leave but Mikasa just held her hand out telling me to wait.

"Just give her time. I know she still feels the same but a lot did just happen so maybe it wasn't the best time to go and tell her how you feel. She does have a lot going on so just give her time." 

I rolled my eyes at her. 

"I'm serious."

I sighed, "Whatever," Then I left the room. I was done talking to Mikasa, she wasn't mad at me anymore, plus I had my own things I needed to be thinking about. But she might have been on to something. It is pretty incredible that even after all this time F/n and I were reunited so that had to mean something and Mikasa did make another good point, it probably wasn't a good time to tell her, she's been under enough stress, I should have known better than to tell her then. And even if she doesn't, believe me, it doesn't change that I do love her, and nothing will change that. 

I just have to give her time. 

Your Pov

Kuchel and I were leaving the Doctor's office. 

I sighed in the seat. So much has happened in this last week, the stress of that appointment, knowing Mikasa and Kuchel know the truth...Levi and well, everything about him. And no I have the stress of waiting now to see if I have anything. I don't think I do...I mean I hope I don't have anything but I was a whore for all those years. I'd be lucky if I was still clean. But when am I ever lucky? 

I haven't had anything lucky happen to me in years...Unless I count Levi finding me which was...for me, but what about all of them? Kuchel and Mikasa feeling guilty. Levi leaving Cira...

I still can't believe he said he loved me. 

Levi's words started to replay in my head for the one-millionth time. I just couldn't wrap my head around it. There's no way he loves me. Not like that. He wasn't thinking straight. Why would he love a whore? a drugged out one at that? Levi was just in his head, he meant it as we're just friends. It wouldn't make sense if he meant it any other way. 

Like Samuel would say, why would he want damaged goods? 

I sighed, I didn't even know what to say to him now. It's been so weird I can't even look at him. I want to act like I didn't hear him, but what if he says it again? What do I tell him? That I love him too? But he doesn't need me. What type of image will that give him? Everyone loves Levi and if they found out he left Cira to be with me who knows what that will do to his image? I-I just can't. Levi belongs with her, he belongs in this flashy life, not me. I looked out the window in the car sighing. It's just so complicated.

"You okay?" Kuchel asked me taking me out of my thoughts. 

"I'm fine," I told her.

"I don't want you just telling me you're fine, tell me if there's anything wrong okay?" 

"I will," I smiled at her. She was trying her hardest for me. I could tell she feels guilty about everything that happened, but like I've said 100 times I don't blame her or anyone for what happened to me. It was my own fault. They shouldn't have to feel a burden for my mistake. 

"There was something I've been wanting to ask you F/n if you don't mind it is a bit personal," Kuchel spoke up after a while. 

"Yeah?" 

"The boy-Samuel I think you said his name was, do you want to charge him? We can get him to put away for what he did. He doesn't deserve to be on the streets." 

Charge Samuel for what he did? I shook my head, "No, it's fine." 

"Are you sure?" Kuchel asked. 

I nodded, "It wouldn't matter either way." 

I knew I was right too, I've seen him get arrested before and right before the week was over he'd be right back on the street. No one could ever keep him locked up he had too many people to help him get out. I didn't even have to think about it I already know it will happen and that would only make him angry. I already have nightmares from time to time thinking he'll come back to find me, I don't need to give him a reason for those nightmares to come true. 

"It's not worth it." 

"F/n-" 

"I just want to move on," I told Kuchel, "I want to put all that behind me. I'm here and he's nowhere to be seen, I know I'm safe with Levi." then I smiled at her. 

Kuchel sighed loudly, "I just wish I could do something more." 

I placed my hand on her leg for a moment, "You are. You took me out for the checkup today." 

"I want to do more for you." 

"You don't have to, I'm grateful for this." 

After that the rest of the ride was silent neither one of us saying anything, both of us having too much to think about. It didn't take us much longer to get back home. Once we did pull up Kuchel sighed rubbing her face.

"Are you okay?" I asked her.

She nodded, "I am, just tired." 

"You wanna come in? I'm sure Levi wouldn't mind." Besides, I don't want to be alone with Levi, and I'm not sure how much longer I can avoid him.

"No, I'll be fine." Kuchel smiled at me, "You sure you okay?" 

I nodded again, "I'm fine Kuchel." 

"Is Levi taking care of you good enough? You can always live with me." 

I laughed a little, "Levi is fine. He takes care of me." 

Kuchel smiled at me, "He has always been good at that. Way better than me for sure." 

"Kuchel I told you I don't blame you for anything, neither of you-" 

"I know, but that doesn't make it a better pill to swallow." Kuchel shook her head, "How has he been with Cira out?" 

I looked away, "I don't know regular I guess." 

"Does he seem like he really misses her?" 

"I don't know, but I don't think they shouldn't have broken up," 

"I don't know what you saw in her, but she wasn't a good person. I'm glad he finally got the picture." 

"I think he could have done it better or at least for a different reason," I told her honestly.

"But you can see why he did it, he loves you F/n and he couldn't sit there and be with someone who would disrespect you like that." 

There those words again, "He doesn't love me like that, he's confused." 

Kuchel chuckled, "Confused about what? You know that boy loves you. If he didn't he wouldn't have brought you back here." 

"He's getting things confused with that stupid promise he made my mom, it's only the guilt that makes him do this, why else would he want to be with me? We had to go to the doctor to see if I'm carrying any diseases! Who in their right mind would want to be with someone like me?" 

Kuchel reached over and hugged me, "Don't think of yourself like that dear, And I promise it's not. He's doing this we're all helping you because you're F/n and we love you. We love you for who you are, nothing has changed about that. Not for me, not Mikasa, and I'm one-hundred percent sure Levi. We all love you and only want to do what's best for you because we want to see you happy again." 

I hugged her back, I wanted to believe she was telling the truth. But something just kept nagging at the back of my mind, that it was really because of my mom. That's why they all did this, And I wouldn't be mad about it either, I'd just know I didn't have anyone...I don't know It's weird, I just don't want to keep thinking they're lying to me, and I don't want to be a bother to them either...Everything was just so fucked up.

Kuchel pulled away after a moment, I could see she was crying. See, I hate doing this too her. I bet just seeing me makes her feel like she failed me, and my mom. I shook my head, "I should get inside." 

Kuchel nodded, "Okay, take care." 

I nodded getting out of the car, "I'll let Mikasa know to come down." 

I walked in the house to see Levi and Mikasa sitting in the living room. It wasn't often Levi sat in here. "Hey," I spoke up making them both look up at me. 

"You're back," Mikasa said looking at me, "How did everything go?" 

"I should get my test back in a few days," I answered her. I wasn't able to look at them when I answered her either. It was shameful knowing I had to go get tested for something. How could Levi love me knowing that?

"I'm sure you're fine," Levi spoke up. 

I didn't say anything. What do I say to him? I feel like I just took a thousand steps back from how we were. I hated this. 

"Er-well, I'll be on my way out," Mikasa said getting up. 

"You guys take care," and without saying anything else she walked out. I guess she could feel the awkwardness in the air between us and didn't want to be a part of it. I can't blame her. I don't even want to be in this situation. 

"I'm tired, so goodnight," I told Levi about to head to my room but Levi called out to me but I didn't stop walking away.

"F/n it's only 3 in the afternoon." 

"I gotta get that beauty sleep," I called out to him. Maybe if I just joke I can avoid him saying anything. But instead, Levi got up and followed me to my room. I turned back to him, "Levi I told you I'm tired." 

"I'm sorry alright," Levi spoke up. 

I frowned, "What are you sorry about?" 

"This," Levi gestured to the air between me and him. "I shouldn't have told you that stuff the other day, I wasn't thinking about how you'd feel. I lot was going on that say, and I was just feeling overwhelmed."

He was apologizing for telling me he loved me? "It's fine." That's all I could say.

Levi just started at me from down the hallway, "I won't say it again if that will make you feel better." 

"I feel fine Levi," 

"Bullshit, you've been avoiding me." 

"That's because I think you made a bad decision." 

Levi started to walk a bit closer, "Let me worry about that. I just want you to act regular again. I miss you." 

I sighed, it wasn't like what he was saying wasn't true, I had been avoiding him, and I did miss him too, I didn't like avoiding him, but still...took another deep breath, "You're right I have been avoiding you...I'm sorry I just didn't know how to respond to what you said." 

"You don't have to say anything about it. Like I said I'm sorry for putting that on you. I won't say it again. Just do lock yourself in the room anymore." 

I'm not sure if I like the idea of him never saying it again...I shook my head to myself. I shouldn't care. "Okay, deal." 

Levi smirked at me, "Are you hungry?" He changed the subject quick. 

I crossed my arms, "I guess." 

He started to walk away, "Good, cause I got take out, we can watch movies and eat Chinese food for the rest of the day." 

I watched him walk away. I loved him still. I know I do, but the time for us...is just over I've accepted that. At least that's what I want to believe; because I know he shouldn't be with me. He shouldn't want to be with me...but despite everything, he keeps me in his life... I just don't understand anything anymore.

~.~.~

Levi Pov 

"So what's this nonsense Cira was telling me about? You guys are on a break?" Haile asked me. 

I was doing some shopping today outside the house, ran into her. She was one of the cast members on the show. I didn't talk or keep up with them all but Hailie was always okay, I thought of her like a younger sister kinda like Bella, but she was a bit more chill.

"I don't know what you're talking about," I told her as she followed me down the aisle. 

"As if, I thought you'd guys would get married by now," He laughed.

"When do you even talk to her?" 

"Everyone now and then we talk to each other, but seriously? What's up with the two of you?" 

"Nothing worth talking about." 

"Okay, what about this girl she mentioned? A crackhead?" 

I just looked at her, "Don't poke your nose into things that aren't your business." I told her. Who the hell else didi Cira tell about F/n? And why is she going around doing this? 

"Fine, I won't press on it anymore, but just watch who you hang around these days, haven't you started filming? Don't want any scandals right now," She told me. 

I rolled my eyes, "Don't you have your own shopping to do?" 

"Yeah, but I never see you. And it's been a while since I've messed with you." 

I sighed "I'm leaving." 

"Oh, by the way are you going to that charity ball this weekend?" 

"I got one of those invites, but I hadn't decided." 

"I bet it will be fun, everyone's going to be there not to mention you'll get a chance to dress up, you know I can never give up a chance to dress up." 

"I'll see you later," I told her ignoring her. I didn't know if I wanted to go yet. I did get one of those invites it's supposed to be this big event. I didn't go to many the ones I did it was only because Cira made me. Not that I didn't like giving to charity, I just didn't need to go out to a stupid ball. It wasn't for me. Although...F/n would like it. I wonder...She never got to go to Prom. But it's not the same. But still, it would be fun for her. I'll have to ask her.

It's been about a week since we started talking again. And things have been alright. I promised I wouldn't tell her I loved her anymore, and she seems okay with it. I know I'm not, but it's all I can do. No matter what Mikasa and my mother say, I just know it won't work out between F/n and me anymore, at least not a relationship like I want. She's moved past that. and most likely still blames me, and she had every right to anyway. 

I was walking to the checkout, and my phone started to ring. I looked at it was F/n.

"Yeah?" I answered her. 

"So good news," She told me, she sounded excited. 

"What's up?" 

"I'm clean!" She cheered.

I could hear the smile in her voice. She was excited. She had been worried about that doctor visit for a while, but I know she would good results. I wasn't worried, but it's good to know she can rest easy now. "I told you were," I told her. 

"Aw, I'm just so happy, I don't know it's just a relief you know." 

"We should celebrate." 

"Ha, what? you wanna do something other than watch movies all day?" she joke. That was all we did for the most part. I didn't have to do much to be happy with F/n that was always the case. We don't have to do anything just as long as I'm next to her everything is alright.

"I was thinking something bigger this time?" 

"Oh yeah? Such as?" 

"There's this big charity ball coming up this weekend, wanna go with me?" 

"Seriously?"

"Why would I joke about that?" 

"Yeah, but why would you want to go with me?" 

I want to tell her because I love her, but I know she won't react to that well, "Because I think you'd like it." 

"But won't there be like famous people there?" 

"Tsk, I'm a famous person." 

"Tch, you're Levi, you don't count. But still, I don't belong there." 

"You belong anywhere I'm at, You'll have fun." 

She took a moment, "I don't have anything to wear. " 

"Don't worry about that," I told her, "I'll figure something out." 

"Figure something out? You don't know what size I am!" 

"Give me some credit, we did grow up together, and you were my girlfriend." 

F/n went quiet for a moment, "Okay, I'll see you later then?" 

"Yeah, I'm at the store now do you want anything?" 

"No, I'm good Mikasa already left for the day." 

"Hmm, I'll be home in a minute then okay?" 

"Kk," Then she hung up.

I sighed to myself. This should be fun I guess. 

~.~.~

Your Pov

"Oh, you look great." 

I looked down at the dress, "I don't know Mikasa?" It was a slim black dress.

Mikasa Bella and I were looking at some dressed Levi had sent to the house, he's been out all day. I think getting ready for tonight. But so far I haven't; been able to find anything from these dresses sent. "These are just so fancy," I told them. They were both over helping me get ready. Levi didn't want to leave me alone, but I'm glad it was fun getting ready with them.

"You're going to a fancy place," Bella spoke up. 

"There's going to be fancy people there," Mikasa said.

"But look at this," I gestured to myself, "I don't belong with fancy." 

"Would you stop cutting yourself short. You're beautiful," Mikasa told me.

I looked over myself. I wasn't convinced, but I would try. "Let me try on the pink one." 

"How long is Big bro going to be out?" Bella asked. 

"He's getting his hair and makeup done," Mikasa answered, "And he texted me a few minutes the team for you should be here in an hour so you need to hurry up and pick a dress," Mikasa said. 

"I'm hurrying, I'm hurrying," I told him putting the pink dress on. It was a two piece. The top was short sleeves but was made with these diamonds while the bottom was a long A-line skirt. It was really pretty, and it was my favorite color

I looked over myself turning around a few times, "I think I like this one," I told them. 

I looked at Bella and Mikasa, "I think I like it too." Bella spoke up, "It's so you. Levi's going to flip," Bella smiled. 

"Why would he do that?" 

"Because you look hot," She said like to was obvious.

"Smoking," Mikasa said pointing her finger at me. 

I couldn't help but laugh, "It's not that deep." I had to shake my head to myself. Levi can't-he doesn't think of me that way. He made that clear when he said he wouldn't say he loved me. and he's been regular for the most part, I mean for Levi...not that means much it's Levi after all. But it's been alright, We run together a lot more, I haven't been having any real bad issues like I was, only little erges but I feel like I can run those off. 

"I bet you'll have all the other men turning heads," Mikasa laughed. 

"That will get Levi blood boiling," Bella laughed back with her.

"Would the two of you get serious," I told them. But in truth, I was having fun. I imagine this is how getting ready for prom was. That was something I had wanted to do so bad but didn't get the chance this isn't the same thing but it's close to it. I can only help but wonder if Levi knew that if that's why he invited me to this thing. Which would be nice, and just shows he cares...Levi always cared. 

"We're just joking around," Mikasa said sitting up, "You'll have fun tonight." 

Yeah, I hope so.

Levi Pov

I got home in just enough time to be ready for the limbo that was coming to pick us up. It wasn't a big event like an award show or anything but still, It's a drag to drive there. I had been texting Mikasa all day while I was out, she and Bella were with F/n helping her get ready. I figured it would be fun with them altogether. Give F/n more time to bond with them, plus I have to admit since they've all found out the truth it's like a burden has been lifted off F/n's shoulder and she can be freer.

I walked in the house and called out for them to let them know I was back, "The ride should be here soon!" I called out to them.

No one said anything for a while, but then I heard some loud noises coming down the hallway. I looked to the doorway, it was Mikasa and Bella. They were both laughing and pushing at each other when they to in the living room.

"Tch, what's your issues?" 

"Nothing, you look nice," Mikasa said laughing.

"Yeah, a nice black suit." 

"Way better than that green Christmas tree." 

"It's because you're going with F/n isn't it?" Mikasa teased. 

"Tsk, You said she picked out the pink dress right?" I asked looking at some ties I had already had set aside at the house. I wanted to match her but I didn't know which one she'd pick. 

"She did," Bella answered me. 

I went ahead and put the pink tie on, I wanted to match her. I know it would make her happy. "What's taking her so long our ride should be here in a few minutes." 

"She's getting the last few touches done." 

I nodded, "Alright, how do I look?" I asked them turning away from the mirror. 

"Very handsome," We all looked to the door, to see F/n walking in. 

How could anyone be this beautiful? She took my breath away. F/n was- I didn't even have the words to describe her, she was gorgeous. "F/n..." 

"I told you he'd be speechless." 

"Levi is such a nerd." 

I glanced at Bella and Mikasa and the comments but I couldn't focus F/n was just so beautiful. 

"You look amazing," I told her. She had her hair up curled. The dress fitted her perfectly and with the bit of skin she had out was just enough to give her that sexy edge. 

"Thank you, Levi," F/n smiled at me. "You look really handsome too." 

"Thank you," I nodded, "We-er the ride should be here in a few minutes." 

F/n just nodded, like she was lost for words as much as I was. 

"You guys are hopeless," Mikasa laughed. 

"I don't need to hear anything from the peanut gallery," I told them.

"Looks like your ride is pulling up," Bella said looking out the window. 

"You ready?" I asked F/n.

She nodded. 

"Wait! I need a picture," Mikasa said stopping us, "Mom would kill me if I don't take a picture." 

"Seriously?" 

"Come one Levi," F/n pulled at my arm, "Kuchel would love this." 

"Tsk, sure," I stood there with her and took a few pictures with her. 

"Okay, you guys have a good time," Mikasa told us putting her phone away. 

"We will," F/n told her. 

I held my arm out to F/n, and she took it I could see she hesitated for a moment, but I just smiled at her, "Don't be so nervous, I'm here with you." 

F/n smiled back at me, "Okay," She nodded. 

I smiled back, I don't know what it was but I do really think tonight is really going to be a good night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!! 
> 
> Fun chapter...next chapter should be even more fun ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
> 
> ~also I'd like to shout out Dianasaurus94 for being amazing! Your comment on every chapter and I swear every time you do you just bring a smile to my face, I really do appreciate you for that so I just want to say thank you and I hope you and everyone enjoyed this chapter <3
> 
> ~Please leave a kudo and a comment, I'd love to know your thoughts on the story so far   
> xoxo


	50. Chapter 50

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had two songs in mind in this chapter one was Halo by Beyonce   
> the other was May I have this dance {remix ft, chance the rapper} by Francis and the light.

Your Pov

This was exciting. 

I was feeling all jitter, sitting there next to Levi. I glanced at him, he looked so handsome. He always did, funny how lately I haven't been thinking about it though. I've just been so used to Levi being Levi I forget how hot he is sometimes. I laughed to myself, of course, he's hot. He goes voted the sexiest man alive a while back. And he's so young too. With all he's accomplished in just five years, I just have to say I'm really impressed. 

"What are you laughing about?" Levi asked me. 

"Oh, nothing. Just thinking how you really came out here and made a name for yourself." 

Levi looked at me and took my hand, "Don't worry yourself so much." 

I smiled, "I'm not worried...just nervous I don't know how people would react to me? I'm sure they'll just ignore me." 

"If we're lucky." 

"What do you mean?" 

"I doubt it, most likely someone will try and get in my face and ask a whole bunch of questions," Levi looked at me, "But you should be okay." 

"Oh," I didn't say anything. I hope I won't bring down his image or anything. I wonder if he could have taken anyone else to this thing..."Did you ever go to this with Cira? Do you think she'll be there? Will that be a problem?" I asked him. I was starting to get concerned. I don't know why I didn't think of all those things until now. 

Levi squeezed my hand, "Calm down." 

"I am calm," I lied to him.

"It will be fine, I doubt Cira will be there and if she is who cares, She's gotten the hint she won't mess with you, I'll make sure of it." 

I just looked down. 

"I'll protect you okay?" 

I looked back up at Levi, I hope he was telling the truth this time. "Okay." 

Levi Pov

We pulled up to the charity ball and I could already hear the crowds and see all the flashing lights. I looked over to F/n who was looking outside the window. "This is insane," She said disbelief. She turned to me, "I've never seen these many people out anywhere! Levi this is crazy I can't go," 

"Calm down-" 

"Levi," She said in a more serious tone. 

I rolled my eyes, she was overthinking, as usual, she needed to relax I know she'll have fun if she just tries it. "We're going to get out, they'll ask me to take a few pictures. They'll make me stand in certain places ask a few questions then we'll go into the building. They might get some pictures with you too." 

"Why me?" 

"Cause you're my date." 

"Wait, doesn't everyone still think you're with Cira? This will be a mess." F/n was getting fidgety She watched the driver get out and start to open our door. I sighed I needed to calm her down before we went out. "It will be fine," I squeezed her hand, "I'll be with you the whole time. I know you'll have fun, you just have to trust me." 

F/n hesitated for a moment but took a deep breathe, "Okay." 

Your Pov

There just so many lights. 

I didn't even know where to look. When we got out I just saw flashes of lights and people yelling. It was almost blinding. Everyone seemed to be yelling Levi's name. Asking him all sorts of things. It was insane! I've only seen things like this on TV, I didn't think it was real. 

I was holding on to Levi's arm since he was my escort so to speak, and honestly, I was happy to be holding him. It was so disorientating I felt like I was going to trip. 

"Levi over here, let me ask you a few questions!" 

"Mr. Ackerman my I get some pictures!" 

"Is it true, You can Cira aren't together anymore?" 

"Who is this young lady with tonight?" 

So many people asking Levi all type of questions but he seemed to be ignoring them all. 

"Is it true she's your mistress?" 

I was about to say something but Levi spoke up, "Just ignore them, they all stay crazy stuff to get your attention. They'll do anything for a story." 

I just nodded. 

Suddenly a woman in black came up to us, "If the two of you could just stand here for some pictures," She gestured to us. Levi walked with me to the spot. I have no Idea what I was supposed to do though! I swear! I hated this! He didn't tell me if I should smile, "Levi how should I take a picture?" 

"Just be yourself F/n," He told me. 

What? was a bunch of help! I don't even know what myself was? I took a quick pick at Levi he seemed to be giving them a light smile, maybe I should too? I just took a quick deep breath and smiled like he was. 

"Okay," The same girl from before said then basically pushed us out the way. 

"Don't mind her, they're all in a rush. It's a lot of people they have to get through," Levi told me. 

I just nodded. 

"Are you doing okay?" He asked me.

I nodded again, "It's just a lot." 

"It will get better when we get in-" 

"Levi Ackerman! Can I have a moment of your time?" A woman spoke up over the crowd. 

"I have to talk to this one, you don't have to answer anything from her if you don't want." He told me as we walked closer to her. 

"You look handsome tonight, I just had to say, but that's nothing new!" She joked with him. 

Levi laughed back, "Thank you Joy." So he knew this woman? I wonder if she's interviewed him before?

"Now, Levi you know I'm a huge fan and there's been a lot of talk about you in this new Mori Walter film. We're very excited to see what type of emotions he can bring out of you, how has it been working with him?" 

"Well, the times I have worked with him have fun, well I'll say very educational. He's a man who really loves his craft and the way he tells stories it an amazing thing to be a part of." Levi answered her. I was a bit impressed he sounded so professional. I wasn't expecting a response like that.

The woman nodded at him, "That's great I'm sure just like me the rest of the world is excited to see what you do when the movie comes out. I also wanted to mention the photo shoot you did with Mat Zolf, Everyone knows he's very popular in the industry these days. Those pictures were amazing I just had to note that." 

Levi nodded, "Thank you." 

"And speaking of those photos, You were the model with him?" She asked pointing at me.

Shit. I didn't think she'd really ask me anything! I'm a nobody! I nodded, "Yeah, I guess it was." 

She smiled at me, "You were lovely in those, I swear I wish I has your figure." 

"Oh, it was just a last minute thing," I told her. It really wasn't a big deal. I didn't want anyone blowing it up.

"And I love your dress," She spoke up again, "You both look very lovely tonight, Like the perfect couple. I take it she is your date tonight?" 

"Yes, She is," Levi said proudly. 

Part of me felt my heart fluttered at him proclaim that, but the other half felt a sick feeling, is this him telling everyone he's done with Cira? If so what will they all think of me?

The woman just smiled, "How nice, well I can't take up to much of your time. The two of you enjoy the rest of your night." Then a woman came behind us and started to gesture us to go inside. 

"There's defiantly a lot of people working to get things moving," I told Levi. 

"Yeah, it's always like this. Award shows are ten times worst then this though, At one of those I'd be walking for at least two hours just going from interview to interview." 

"That's insane, this whole thing is insane," I told him shaking my head. 

"You're telling me, I can't wait to be done with this, We should just go to bed when we get back home." 

"I bet Mikasa and Bella are still there waiting on us to get back so we can tell them how everything went." 

"I doubt it, They can just watch it." 

"Watch it?" 

"The thing is being televised, didn't I tell you?" 

"We're on Tv?" 

"Well, not right now, but the show before the ball part stars is, It's nothing crazy, It's for this big charity," He said like it didn't matter. 

But it did, I nudged him hard, but so no one could see it, "Why didn't you tell me we'd be on TV." 

"Sorry, I didn't think of it as a big deal before," He said. 

"It is a big deal!" I said in a harsh whisper. What was he thinking? I can't be on TV. I'm hideous! all the world could see me! I don't even know where to start unpacking all the things that are wrong with that!

"It's fine-" 

"It's not fine Levi, I'm hideous," I told him.

"You're beautiful." 

"I am not." 

"Are too, if you ask me you're the most beautiful person in this room, any guy here would be the luckiest man alive if he had you as a date," Levi told me without looking at me. 

I sighed, "You're only saying that cause you're my friend." 

"Best friend," He corrected me.

I snorted, "Sure." he could be so corny, but I'll admit when Levi tells me stuff like that. I feel a little bit better. 

"Trust me, You'll look great." 

"Levi Ackerman?" A man in black called out to him this time. "We have your seats right over here." He directed us to one of the tables in the dining room. 

"These are some of the guys I worked on with the show, So you know Hailie's a chiller Bella, so heads up. Joe is alright." Levi informed me about some of the people who were already seated at the table. They were people who worked with Levi. Should I be excited? These are his friends, it's kinda strange. Levi's friends have always been my friends too, but these were people I've never met not to mention they were from TV.

"Levi, I didn't think you'd come!" The girl jumped up, "You look handsome." 

"Thanks," Levi smiled at them. That was rare, I wonder if they all are really good friends? 

"This is F/n," Levi told them nodding his head at me, "F/n, this is Hailie, Joe. Diana. Damon, Kevin, and Tamara. They were all on the show with me." 

"Nice to meet you all," I told them. I was, although it was a little weird I was seeing people I've seen on TV, but in real life. It's surreal. Levi and I sat down. They were all nice, they seemed to be having a conversation to themselves, And I didn't mind. I was just happy to be here. It might be a little upsetting to had just found out this was going to be on TV, but still being here with Levi was fun. 

"So where is Cira?" Hailie asked. 

Uh oh, Levi clicked his tongue, "I don't know." 

"Pretty shitty way to treat your girlfriend," The guy Kevin said to him. 

I looked at Levi, this was bad, I didn't want to start a fight between him and his friends! This is supposed to be a good night.

"Wait a minute," Hailie's voice went up, "I know that name! F/n!" She said my name, and I looked at her. Did she know me? I didn't know her. I know I didn't. 

"F/n?" She looked at the rest of the guys at the table, "Levi's Ex, the one he would always brag about when we all first met, and then stopped talking about when he moved back here. Remember?" 

"Oh, shit? I remember." Joe spoke up. 

I felt a sinking feeling in my stomach at the mention of me being his ex, but then I looked at Levi. He used to talk about me? But then he stopped. Must have been when I left with Samuel.

"Aw, the two you got back together?" The girl named Diana asked. 

"Don't aw them," Hailie cut her off, "You said she cheated on you and you hated her. Does that ring a bell. Joe?" 

"Hailie, you're making a scene," Joe told her. 

"Hailie you don't know what you're talking about," Levi spoke up to her. 

I didn't say anything. I didn't know what to say. He told them he hated me? This wasn't the first time I've heard this...but still to know I hurt Levi that much that he hated me...I was just so stupid. 

"Sorry, Hailie had a bad habit of talking without thinking, " I head one of them say. 

I shook my head, "It's fine." 

"No it isn't I can't seat with her here, She's taking up Cira's seat. She told me that she came into town and basically took Levi, and Levi's I can't believe you'd leave Cira after everything." 

"I'm sorry," I told her. Maybe she was right who did I think I was? I can't just come in here and take Cira's place. I didn't think that's what I was trying to but to them, it must seem like that. I stood up, all there eyes on me. "Excuse me for a moment." 

I heard Levi call out to me but I just tried to give him my best smile, "I'm just going to the bathroom, I got up and went to one of the people to help me find a bathroom.

Once I got in there I went into a stall. Nothing can ever go right for me. Every time I feel like my taking some steps to get better something happens. I just don't belong with Levi. I should hurry up and leave. I can't keep doing this and now this was so embarrassing! I was crying in a bathroom around a whole bunch of famous people. This is a whole new low for me. I should have known better. What was wrong with me? Why do I keep trying to have hope? The way she looked at me, disgust. They all think I stole Cira from Levi, and if they think that that's what his fans will think...and who knows what that will do to his job on this new movie. I know he's been excited about it. He went to his first table read the other day. And now bring me here might have ruined it. I should have just stayed out of his whole life.

"Are you okay in there?" 

I heard a woman's voice ask me. 

I sniffed this was so embarrassing, "I'm fine." I lied to them I didn't need anyone seeing I was crying. I sighed this was supposed to be a good night. But I can't have a good night, can I?

"You don't sound okay in there, are you sure?" They asked. 

I tried to whip my tears I need to woman up, Just get through this night and after that, I just need to leave Levi to his own life. I"m grateful for what he's done for me, but I'm just going to keep bringing him down. I started to walk out of the stall, "I'm fine-" 

But when I saw who was asking me if I was okay I froze. 

Oh, my fucking God, It was Beyonce!

Levi Pov

"What the hell is wrong with you?" I looked at Hailie. I could expect something like this from Cira but not her. 

"I'm just helping you, Levi, Cira told me she's just using you for your money." 

"Cira lied to you," I snapped at her, I wanted to yell, but I didn't need to cause a scene. "You don't even know F/n you didn't have any right to judge her like that." 

"I wasn't judging her I-" 

"That was wrong," Tamara told her, "He's right, we don't know her you went in too hard her, And since when do you listen to Cira?"

"You know she's messy," Joe told her. 

I was glad the rest of them knew better. 

"I was only trying to help," Hailie said in a quieter voice. 

"I didn't ask you too, I already told you to mind your own business. Cira and I aren't together for a lot of reasons, and I'm not even in a relationship like that with F/n. You assumed and was way out of line. You don't know anything about F/n none of you do, not even Cira, you owe her an apology," I told her.

I was done with people shitting on F/n. She didn't deserve it. She hasn't done anything wrong. I need everyone to see that. I need her to see that. I wanted to go after her, but I'm sure she just needs a moment. But I looked at Hailie, "Go find her and apologizes. "

Hailie didn't say anything for a moment, but then she nodded and got up. 

I told myself I'd start doing more right by F/n and this was a start. If anyone was going to talk shit about her, or to her, I'd make sure to tell them off." 

If I couldn't tell F/n I loved her, I'd at least show it to her in my actions. 

Your Pov

Beyonce! 

Fucking Beyonce! I don't think I'd really wrapped my head around the whole thing yet. But here I was in a woman's bathroom venting all my problems to Beyonce. I didn't mean too I'm sure she thinks I'm a fucking weirdo telling her a brief history of my life, and crying. But she asked me what was wrong, she insisted and how could I lie to Beyonce? She was just so nice! 

I had just told her about how the girl at the table hated me, but then I shook my head, "I'm sorry. I shouldn't be keeping you here You have way better things to be doing." 

"Oh, you are fine," She told me. 

She took my hands, "You are so strong." 

Beyonce was telling me I was strong, "From everything you've told me, you've been so brave and strong. You should be able to see that." She smiled, "And that man loves you." 

I could almost start laughing, I must be dreaming all this. Beyonce in the woman's bathroom that I'm strong, and Levi's in love with me. Yeah, I gotta be. "Thank you but it's just not the same-" 

"You have to stop selling yourself short. You're a beautiful young woman, and now you have the whole world at your feet, be free. And let that man love you. He wouldn't have brought you out here if he didn't. I've met him before, he always seemed like the type of guy who has a good reason for everything he does, just trust him, you have to trust your family. And he's your family." 

Maybe she was right? I mean it's Beyonce...when has she ever been wrong? This whole thing was so surreal, I don't even know if this is really happening to me right now. Although it would make sense. Seeing Levi again, being with him in L.A. meeting Beyonce this all could be apart of a really good drug trip. 

"Ms, Beyonce?" 

"Just call me by," 

I nodded I have to be dreaming but that didn't stop me from speaking my mind. "Thank you, for your advice, but it's not that easy. I've messed up so much...I don't know how to fix anything." 

"You don't have to fix anything, you just have to let go of your doubts. Let him love you." She told me with a smile.

Let him love me?

I was about to say something else, but just them that girl walked into the bathroom. I avoided her gaze, I didn't want another problem. 

But I did notice she looked a bit surprised to see me standing there with Beyonce. I mean who wouldn't be? It's fucking Beyonce. But then she cleared her throat, "F/n?" 

I looked up at her. What did she want?

"I'm sorry." 

Well, I can say I wasn't expecting that from her. 

"I shouldn't have came for you like that. I don't even know you," She told me, "It was wrong, can we start over?" 

Yeah, I wasn't expecting like this. 

"See, things are already turning around," Beyonce said picking up her hand bad off the sink. "You two enjoy the rest of your night." Then she walked out. 

I watched the way she moved, she was so unreal...I just met Beyonce. I shook my head and looked back at Hailie. 

"So you were talking to Beyonce?" she asked. 

I nodded, "She's something." I really need to focus. I shook my head again, "No, I'm sorry-" 

Haile put her hand up making me stop talking, "Don't be. You didn't do anything to me, you came here to have a nice time and I almost ruined it, I'm sorry." She looked like she really did feel bad about it. 

I sighed to myself, she didn't need to get worked up about it. But still, it was nice to hear an apology, something I'm sure Cira would never do. Let's start over I repeated back to her from earlier.

She smiled, "Good, now let's get you back to Levi," She said putting her hand out for me to take. 

Levi Pov

So far everything was going alright again. Since F/n left the bathroom she seems to be in a better mood. He and Hailie seemed to be getting along a bit better. She didn't say much to me since she's been back though, but I don't mind at least she's smiling. And thankfully the show and dinner didn't go on for too long. Now they had cleared the dining room and were playing music.

"So you say you're not dating her?" Joe asked me.

We were both in the bathroom. I sighed, "Why do you care?" 

"Just asking think of a friend. You may say you're not together, but it looks another way." 

"I know what's going on and that's all that matters to me," I told him.

Joe put his hands up in defense, "I was just looking out for a friend no judgment here." I didn't say anything I just walked out the bathroom. Nothing anyone else says will make me think any differently of F/n. The world can have its theories, but I know how I feel. I know the truth. I love her and nothing else matters. 

Once I got out of the bathroom I didn't see her where I had left her at but once I did find her standing next to some randoms talking I couldn't help but smile. She was so beautiful. She was an angel. I wish things could go back to how they used to before all this shit happened in our lives, but I'm still happy to have her in my life. I want to give her the world. I want her to feel like her life is still worth living. I just want to mean half of what she means to me for her. 

I walked up to her clearing my throat, she turned around smiling at me, "Hey," 

"Hey," I smiled back, "Care to dance?" 

F/n's laughed, "I would love too." 

I took her hand and brought her to the dance floor, A nice song slow song was playing. In most cases, I would say I didn't like this type of thing, but if it's with F/n I could manage. I liked holding her close. Having her head lay against my chest, us just swaying to the music. I could do this forever if it made her happy.

Suddenly F/n hit me on the chest, "What?" I asked annoyed she was ruing the moment.

"Why did you tell me you knew Beyonce!" She said in a harsh whisper. 

"It never came up why?" 

"I met her, in the bathroom and she mentions she knew you," she shook her head, "Real convent." 

"Was she nice to you?" 

F/n nodded, "She was, she's a really sweet woman. And She was...well you know queen like." She laughed. 

"Tsk, so corny," I teased her.

"You know I still hate it when you do that," She said laying her head back down my on my chest. 

"What's that?" 

"Clicking your tongue, it's still annoying as hell."

"Why haven't you said anything till now then?" 

F/n didn't say anything for a moment but then she cleared her throat. "Maybe cause I missed you so much. So I don't mind as much as I used too. It's still annoying, but I'd rather have your flaws and all in my life than to not have you in it...know what I mean?"

"Yeah, I have a good idea," I told her. Cause even know I wouldn't trade F/n for anything. So I knew exactly what she meant. I'd rather have her like this in my life, working to get better than to not have her at all she was everything needed. 

We danced a few more songs I honestly didn't want to stop, but I could tell she was getting tired, and I was too, "Ready to go home?" 

She nodded, "Let's say bye to everyone." 

"Nah, they'll just end up keeping us here longer, It would be fun to just dip go get ice cream or something and lay in bed till tomorrow night." 

F/n rolled her eyes, "You have no work ethic. You lazy around every day." 

"I have one, just the perks of my job is I don't have to do it every day." 

"Must be nice." 

"It is," I teased her back. "Go get your bag, I'll tell the ride to get ready." 

~.~.~

Your Pov

I dozed in and out on the ride home. So the ride was pretty uneventful, But finally, we go to the house and I went to change my clothes. I had thought Bella and Mikasa would still be here, but Levi told me sometimes during the night they went home. 

I looked at my reflection in the mirror. I still looked all dolled up. I looked at my bed just a few hours ago I had makeup artists and everything helping me get ready, and I really went to a big dance in a big pink dress. It was magical.

It was something out of a fairytale. 

And It was all thanks to Levi. he was amazing he always was. Even for a moment tonight I thought it was going to be a disaster, but it didn't everything turned out alright maybe Beyonce was right. I snorted to myself, I won't be getting over that for a while. Just then there was a knock at my door, I went to open it. I could only be Levi. 

"I'm not ready to lazy around yet," I told him. "And you don't look that ready either," He was still in his white dress shirt and pants. his tie was off though.

Levi moved to lean against the door frame, "I'm comfortable what's taking so long? What are you in here just staring at yourself?" 

I felt a little embarrassed, that's exactly what I was in here doing. "I'll call you when I'm done getting ready. And I want to watch movies on the couch like a regular person. We don't have to stay in my room to do this." 

"You bed feels better on my back." 

I frowned at him, "Then buy the same mattress for your bed?" 

He shook his head, "It's not the same." 

"Whatever." 

Levi didn't say anything else for a moment. And while he didn't I took the time to put my hair down and take the makeup off my face, It was time to go back to regular old me. 

"For what it's worth, I think you look better this way," Levi said. 

I looked at him from his reflection in the mirror," Thank you, Levi. You know you looked really handsome tonight, not that you don't any other day, but when you put on a suit something else about you just stands out." 

"Gee, thanks." 

I rolled my eye at him. 

"Anyway can you get out so I can get out off this dress?" I asked him turning around. 

Levi just nodded and closed the door. Finally, a moment I can breathe. I don't know what it was but something about the way he was looking at me. I could tell he was in deep thought about something, but I have no idea what. I don't know what he thinks about at all anymore. It's a bit frustrating but when he looks at me with those grey eyes like he has something to tell me, it just drives me crazy. 

I was getting more frustrated I couldn't get this stupid zipper down! Ugh, why was everything being so annoying right now? I got up I couldn't do this on my own I needed help. I walked out of my room to see Levi wasn't standing there. Hmm, I thought he would be. 

I want down to the kitchen, to see him popping popcorn, "Hey help me with this," I told him pointing to my zipper. 

Levi walked over and started to zip it down. Originally I didn't think anything of it, but as he was zipping it down I could feel his hand hover over my bareback, and I could feel his breath on the back of my neck he seemed to be moving slower too I couldn't help feel a shiver in my spine...to have him so close like this. Levi moved his hands to my waist I could feel his thumbs start to make little circles. 

"Levi?" I didn't know what else to say to him. But the way his hands were moving was about to start driving me crazy. I turned around to face him. "Levi," 

But Levi was looking down at me, with that dumb look in his eyes that I hate so much, "Is everything alright?" I asked him. Our faces were so close together. 

"I know I shouldn't but I "I wanna try something."

"And what is that?" I asked him for feeling breathless.

"Don't get mad." He said getting closer to me.

Somehow this conversation was feeling like Deja vu "Don't do anything I'd get mad-" I was telling him but before I knew it Levi's lips were over mine.

Levi was kissing me, and I was kissing him back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Levi's done did it now, the next chapter should be even more interesting.
> 
> Anyways I hope you enjoyed this chapter! It was fun to write. I even put a little treat for two of you idk if you picked it, but it was there Anyways I can't wait to see you're reactions to this chapter with the whole kiss, and Beyonce thing. I have to admit it was fun writing Beyonce into the story a little weird because she's a real person but still pretty fun. Tell me if you all enjoyed that. 
> 
> till the next chapter!
> 
> xoxo


	51. Chapter 51

Your Pov 

Levi was kissing me, I was kissing him back

And somehow it was better then I remembered it when we were younger. Levi started the kiss of slow, but as I kissed him back he started to move his mouth more urgently over mine, and I wasn't complaining. I wanted this. I wanted to be close to him. I wanted this for so long to just be in his arms again...But something about it wasn't right. 

I'm can't get past the thought that I'm not good enough for him. I don't deserve him. This wasn't right. 

I didn't want to but I pulled away, "We can't-I can't Levi." 

"F/n," Levi started to say but I put my hand out stopping him.m 

"No, I..." I was breathing heavy I couldn't think straight. I took a few steps back from him. I couldn't do this. Not to Levi, what if we did something and he'd regret it. I've been around too much I'm dirty. He doesn't want me...He's not thinking straight. I turned from him and started to walk back to my room. I needed to get away from him before I did something stupid that we'd both ended up regretting. 

I sat down on my bed. What was I thinking? I was replaying what just happened in my head, I wanted to kiss Levi...I did I wanted to hear him say how he loved me, I wanted to tell him how I still loved him...but something just wasn't right about it...He's not the same person he was when were kids. Things are different. But God, why did it something so wrong feel so right? Or was it so right and it just felt wrong? I don't know anymore. I didn't know anything anymore.

I laid back on my bed, and I couldn't help but smile and touch my lips. 

If only things were the same...

Levi Pov

I stood in the kitchen, I was trying to focus on if I wanted something to eat or not, but my mind kept jumping back to last night. Right here I kissed her. I wasn't thinking when I did. I just was unzipping her dress and was thinking about how beautiful she was then she turned around and was looking at me...I just wanted her...And then she kissed me back. I don't know if I even expected her to, but I know I was happy she did. She wanted me in that moment. But just as quick as she did she pulled away and ran. 

I wanted to talk to her, say I was sorry anything, but I decided against it. 

But damn I wanted to do it again. 

I missed her. 

Just then I looked up and she was walking in the kitchen but froze when she saw me. She quickly averted her eyes, "Morning." She said then went to the cabinet. 

"Tsk, it's a little past morning," I told her, It was about two in the afternoon. I honestly didn't think I'd see her today. I figured she didn't want to say anything to me after last night, but I can't say I wasn't happy she walked out, "You sleep okay?" 

"No, not really," She answered. 

We both went silent for a while. 

"Levi," F/n finally spoke up with a soft voice, "About what happened last night-" She stopped herself. 

"Did I upset you?" I asked her. 

She paused, "It didn't upset me, but we can't do that again." 

"Why not?" 

"Why not?" She repeated after me sounding frustrated, "Because Levi, we're not in a relationship." 

I looked at her, "And if I said I wanted to be in a relationship with you, what would you say?" 

"Levi-" 

"I'm sorry for doing that if it made you upset, but I don't regret it," I cut her off. 

F/n ran her fingers through her hair, "Levi I-We can't-" 

"Why not?" I know I should be more concerned and do what she wants, but I needed an answer, I have my on thought on why she doesn't want to be with me, but I need to hear it from her because after last night I think it isn't because she hates me. I think she's scared. But she has to know she doesn't have anything to be scared of. I want to be here for her, I was here for her, I wasn't going anywhere, and I didn't care about what anyone else had to say.

F/n shook her head, "We're not kids anymore," She was pacing now, "You've done so well for yourself without me. You have people who really look up and admire you if they find out about me it would ruin you! I can't do that to you! You have your own life-" 

"You are my life F/n," I told her moving in front of her. She froze, "You are my life F/n, I know you have to see that." 

She shook her head, "It's different now Levi," 

"Nothing is different. I love you the same way I've always loved you." 

F/n turned away from me and started to walk away "You said you wouldn't say that to me again." 

"I can't lie to you anymore, you have to know!" I called after her. "And I know you still feel the same about me." 

F/n yelled out in frustration turning back to me, "You don't know anything Levi. You always think you know everything, but you don't know anything. You don't know how I feel, you don't know anything about me!" She yelled. 

"So you don't love me?" I asked her. 

"No, I don't," I knew she was lying. 

"Bullshit." 

"Levi just give it a rest." 

I shook my head walking closer to her till her back was against the wall. I wasn't letting her run from this anymore. I want her to be happy I know and I know I can do it for her, "I'll give it a rest when you start being honest with me, and yourself. You're still in love with me." 

F/n was looking around like she was trying to find an excuse. But I could tell in her eyes she wanted this, "Just let me love you," I told her looking down into her eyes. She didn't say anything, so I told her again, this time moving closer to kiss her again. 

And she kissed me back. I knew she wanted this as much as I did. She couldn't lie to me. I know she still loved me. I kissed her hungrily running my fingers through the back of her. Our tounges moved together making the kiss deeper and deeper. I moved my hands from her neck to all over her body then I slowly started to move them up her shirt. I just wanted to touch her, all of her. 

F/n pulled back, but I moved my lips to her neck, I didn't want to stop. 

"Levi?" she gasped my name. 

"Yeah?" 

"I-This-we," 

"What do you want?" I asked her between kissed. She didn't answer me though so I repeated myself, "What do you want F/n?" I pressed my body harder against hers still kissing her neck.

"You're such an idiot," F/n said breathlessly, "Of course I want you." Then F/n pulled my face to kiss her again this time more urgently. I knew she wanted me. There was no way she didn't F/n and I was meant for each other. The was no other way around it. Mikasa was right that day, we wouldn't have just gotten back into each other's lives if we weren't. 

She started fighting me for dominance now, both of us trying to take control of the kiss. Moving around till we made ourselves back into the kitchen once we were I sat her on top of the island still kissing her. F/n pulled back only to pull off my shirt. I didn't protest about it either. We went back to kissing each other. It was perfect everything about this moment was perfect. F/n pulled away and pulled her own shirt over her head, as though that was a sign that it was okay to go further. It didn't take me long to start messing with her bra. As soon as it was off I moved my tongue over them. She tasted so sweet. How did I ever live without her? I kissed me more, but it was growing old while other urgers were growing harder. We've waited long enough, I just wanted her now. She had to be thinking the same thing because F/n started to fiddle with my pants. I went ahead and took pulled them off along with my boxers F/n seemed to be having trouble with her shorts so I went ahead and pulled at them, stripping them off her with her panties.

"I've missed you so much," I whispered into her ear pulling her to the edge of the island table, F/n grabbed my hair and wrapped her legs around me and I entered her, bending my head down over her shoulder lightly biting it. Fuck, she still felt amazing. I started to move, and F/n through her head back moaning. Music to my ears. I leaned her back till she was laying with her back down on the island table and I was hovering over her. I didn't care we were in my kitchen I wanted her now, and it was worth it. I trusted into her backing F/n throw her head back while she kept moaning louder and louder. Usually, if it was Cira I would find it annoying, but with F/n it just made me want to pleasure her more and more. 

"Levi-I'm, Don't stop, Levi!" She screamed my name making me release, inside her. Both of us sweating and breathing heavy. I started to slow my strokes down until I pulled out. leaning my head between her neck giving her light kisses. 

"That was amazing," She gasped out. 

"You're amazing," I told her. Because she was, F/n was an amazing woman. And I was the happiest man in the world to be with her.

Your Pov

Levi had brought us both back into my room and I laid there in his arms facing his chest smiling like an idiot. 

I can't believe we just did it! Well, by now I have no idea what time it was and we did it like three times. I didn't even know Levi had the stamina, but that's beside the point. I was with Levi! I didn't want to...that's what I kept saying to myself. I didn't want to get into this life and ruin everything, but he was in there telling me how much he loved me, and I remembered what Beyonce said. I had to let him love me. Because I wanted to love him, the only thing stopping us was me. But no more. I wanted to be with Levi, and he wants to be with me. 

I just wished it hadn't taken me so long. 

"You okay?" Levi asked me. 

"Everything is perfect." 

Levi kissed my timple, "It is." 

We laid like that for I don't know how long, but I know I hadn't had a moment that felt this right in forever...it really was something out of a dream.

I don't know what time it was but Levi and I both seemed to jump up hearing some noises outside of my room. Was someone in the house? Who was it? Then we heard someone call out his name it was a girls voice. Who was over here? 

Levi got up and started looking around, "Fuck." 

"What is it?" I asked him getting worried.

"I lift my boxers out in the kitchen." 

I snorted, "Sounds like a personal problem." 

"Tsk, Either way, whoever is no doubt saw both of our clothes thrown everywhere,' Levi said putting enfaces on us. "Oi, go see, who it is."

"Why me?" I asked I honestly was comfortable in bed. 

"Cause you have clothes in here it's your room." 

I rolled my eyes at him, he had a point. But more importantly, I was getting upset at whoever this was that was ruining mine's and Levi's night. I put a robe on and walked out to the kitchen only to see Mikasa and Bella standing in there looking around.

I pulled my hair back and cleared my throat, "I've been calling all day and no one has been answering their phones, and then I get here and see everything looking so crazy I thought something happened, but then I noticed your clothes were everywhere too."

"So much for just friends," Bella laughed.

I felt a little embarrassed. Looking around Levi and I did go a little crazy, We knocked down a picture, and some random stuff that was sitting on the island and our clothes were everywhere. Shit, I didn't think Mikasa and Bella would pop up today, and not mention saw my panties laying in the floor. This was defiantly embarrassing. 

"Tsk, go home," Levi spoke up at them walking into the kitchen wearing some sweatpants and no shirt. 

"Have the two of you been at it all day?" Bella teased, "Cause you look like it." 

"Gross," Mikasa said frowning at us.

Levi groaned rubbing his face, "Is there a reason the two of you are in my house?" 

Mikasa's eyes went wide, "Wait there actually was! You would know if you used your phones." Mikasa turned to me, "F/n you're trending!" 

"Huh?" I asked her not getting what she was saying, but then she pulled her phone up closer to me. 

"Look on twitter, you're trending. Everyone was talking about the mystery model Levi took pictures with and went out with last night." 

"What? No way!" I took her phone but sure enough, there was a picture from last night on her feed with the caption 'who's the new girl?' 

I shook my head, "This is insane." 

"You're famous no Bella joked." 

"But I don't want to be. I turned to Levi, "How do I get out of this?" 

Levi groaned, "It should blow over in a few days' we'll just keep it DL." 

Bella laughed, "How do you think Cira feels about it?" 

"Who cares," Levi snapped at her. "Was there something else the two you wanted to talk about?" Levi asked him.

"He really is trying to run us out of her," Mikasa laughed kicking his shirt that was on the floor, "Wait till I tell mom." 

"She'll just say she knew it, now get out of here," Levi told them. 

"Okay, okay, we know when we're not wanted," Mikasa stated getting up. 

"You guys don't play too rough," Bella called out to us while they left. I could hear Mikasa make a sound like she was disgusted. But soon we head the front door close leaving the both of us alone. 

"Wanna get back in bed?" 

I nodded, "I thought you never ask." 

Levi and I head both turned to go back to my room, but before I knew it I was lifted off my feet. I yelped out, "What are you doing?" 

"Getting us back in bed," He said. "I'm ready for round four." 

I snorted, "I don't know if I can keep up." Levi laid me back down on the bed.

"Don't worry I'll do all the work this time," Levi winked at me giving me his trademark smirk. 

I rolled my eyes, "Cocky asshole." 

"You love it," Levi said kissing my neck and going down my body while slowly taking off my robe.

"You're right, I do love it." I told him, "And I love you." 

Levi stopped and looked up at me, "I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!!
> 
> Levi and reader all finally together! About time right? things are starting to look up for the reader (About time) 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed this chapter, as a few of you may know I'm not the most comfortable person with writing smut, cause ya girl doesn't know what she's talking about but I still try. And I would really like some feedback on it. Was it bad good? Do I need to work on something with it? I'm very open to constructive criticism! 
> 
> Ps. I've noticed a nice little schedule for me to update I think weekends work best for me. And during the week I try to take a break and get other projects done. Now that's not to say this is set in stone, because there are some days I really want to get a chapter out and do it right then when I have the time, while others days I'm just not up for it mentally. But this is to say I'll try to do a weekend update scheduled for this fic
> 
> Anyways Until the next chapter 
> 
> xoxo


	52. Chapter 52

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry this chapter took forever to come out but here it is! ENJOY!

Levi Pov

"You okay?" I looked down at F/n. 

We had just got down doing some running in my gym, she looked like she was pushing herself and now had stopped and was breathing heavy.

"I'm fine." 

"Don't push yourself too hard F/n." 

"I'm not," She said taking a deep breath.

"Are you having a withdraw?" 

"I'm not, I was just lost in my head, nothing too bad Levi, Stop worrying so much." 

I went to get her a water bottle, "Tsk, you know I can't do that." 

F/n chuckled while reaching for the bottle, "You need too." 

I pulled it back from her, and she glared at me, but I leaned over kissing her lips. F/n kissed me back, but as soon as she started I pulled away and started to walk off. As far as I'm concerned were done for the day. I didn't need F/n wearing herself out.

"Seriously!" F/n yelled after me. 

"You are such a tease!" 

" Says the one wearing booty shorts." I scoff at her. 

F/n caught up with me, "Whatever you know you like my ass in these." 

I just gave her a quick smile. It was true I did. "I'm going to go ahead and take a shower. You make us something," 

"Tsk, bossy." 

"Would you rather I cook and you shower first?" 

"So you can burn down my house? No thank you." 

"Ass, I can cook." 

"Sure," I told her raising my eyebrows. By now we had made it to my kitchen, "Don't be too long." 

"Don't be too long," She mocked me walking out. 

I watched her leave shaking my head, She may still be annoying. But God, did I love her. It's been a few days since we've been back together. And I've loved every minute of it. F/n being mine again, being able to kiss and hold her whenever I felt like it. Seeing her, hearing her just having her back like this in my life was all I could ask for. She's my everything. I almost wish we could just stay in the house like this all the time. I don't want to share her with anyone. At least not right now, I know Mikasa most likely already mentioned it to my mom, and knowing my mom she'll want us to come over, but I've been putting it off till tomorrow. I just wanted it to be me and F/n for a while no one else.

Shit, I know it's only been what? Four? FIve days? But I'm already thinking about asking her to marry me. I know it's soon, but there's no one else I'd ever want. I just want to be close. It's the one thing I've always wanted to do, and now I have a chance I can't let it slip away again. The only issue Is I don't know how she reacts. I doubt she'll say anything but yes...but then again I thought that all those years ago when I asked her. Granted things were different back then. but still...I can' think of a reason she says no, but it might still be too soon. Maybe next month. 

Just then my phone started to ring. I looked at it was my Agent? What did he want? I answered it, "Didn't I tell you not to call me for a few days?" 

"Levi it's almost been a week, you gotta give me something?" 

He had been calling about F/n. all that buzz about her with me at the gala hadn't died down like I hoped it would. People were still trying to figure out who she was. What was going on with me and Cira? If F/n and I were together now. It was getting to be a real mess. I had hoped people would have gotten the hint by now that's it's none of their damn business. But here we are. My Agent had called me earlier a few days ago, trying to get some info about her. But I don't want F/n in the spotlight. And neither does she, so the fewer people know about her the better. 

"I don't have anything to say," I told him.

"Levi work with me, I know you know the girl. If anything just give her my number something. People really want to know something, and your publishes is getting worried too, they think if you broke up Cira and started dating a model. And with Cira being M.I.A. these days it really isn't helping your case; if these rumors keep going around it might mess up your image." 

"I don't really care Troy." 

"I know, I know, you never do. But I'm just doing my job. Just do an interview give my number to her, make a statement, something!" 

"I'll think about it." Before he could say anything else I hung up the phone. 

I rubbed my face, this was going to be annoying. Everyone wants to know who F/n is and I just want to protect her. She's just left a stressful life. If she gets in the public eye, it might be too much for her. She doesn't need this right now. But I guess I'll have to talk to her about it at some point. Most likely the next time we go out they'll be cameras all over the place asking questions. I just have to get her mentally prepared for it. Once they have something then I'm sure this will all die down. 

"You haven't finished cooking yet?" 

I looked to the doorway, F/n was back. "What was a quick shower." 

"Well, I didn't have you in there bothering me" 

"Tch, I'll be done cooking in a few minutes." 

"Okay," She sat down and pulled out her phone. I noticed she frowned, "Looks like I'm still trending." 

I sighed, I have to tell her about what Troy said. But just not right now, Right now I just want to keep enjoying our time together. 

~~~

You pov

"What are you doing?" 

I looked up at Levi who had just got out the shower it was later int he afternoon and, I was laying on the bed looking at some jobs to apply for on his laptop. "Job hinting." 

Levi frowned, "Why?" 

"What do you mean why? We already agreed I'd get a job." 

Levi stepped back and started to put his clothes on, "That was then though, You don't need one." 

"Levi-" 

"Don't Levi me," He cut me off, "Don't be difficult F/n." 

"I'm not being difficult Levi," I told him sitting up. "I can't depend on you forever thing, you know that." 

"Why not?" Levi sounded like he was getting frustrated. "I'll provide of you, I'm everything you need. I don't want you to have to work. That's part of why I can out in in the first place. So I could take care of the ones I love." 

"Levi, I get that, but I can't just let you do everything for me." 

"F/n-" 

But I cut him off this time, "I'm getting a job, Levi! That's the end of it." 

Levi just glared at me. But then turned and left the room. 

I sighed rubbing my hands through my hair. Why is he being like this? He should get my point. I don't want to have to depend on him for everything. I just want to have a bit of independence. Is that so bad? I've had to depend on people all my life I figured he'd get that? He should get that! He knows what I've been through! I just want to try to do things normally. He's the one being unreasonable right now. The more I think about it the more I was getting more angry about it. He doesn't even have a real reason to get mad! He's so stubborn.

And we were having such a good day. The last few days have been everything! I mean we're back together why wouldn't they be? Hell, just before he got in the shower we were laughing and joking. And now he wants to act like this. I swear he can be so childish. But I just change my mind from this. I need to be able to hold my own too. If everyone else I know can take care of themselves I should be able to too, it's only fair. 

I looked at the door he walked out of. I wonder if he's going to stay out there all night? He is dramatic. And knowing him, he doesn't see how he's wrong. But I don't want to talk to

I put the laptop up, now I didn't even feel like looking for anything anymore. Levi kinda just ruined my whole mood. And we're supposed to go see Kuchel tomorrow. I got back in the bed and tried to lay down, but I was feeling too restless. I can't sleep with leaving it like that with Levi. But he has to admit he's wrong, and I doubt he'll admit so we'll just not talk until he says something...

I snapped up. Screw that! We've been apart too long to get in an argument this soon. Levi doesn't get to argue with me and leave we're going to work this out. I walked out into the living room and saw him just sitting there. 

"Levi," I spoke up. 

Levi didn't say anything.

I sighed and moved to sit beside him, "I don't like arguing with you." 

"Are you happy?" 

"Huh?" I asked him back dumbly.

"Are you happy with me?" 

"Levi you know you don't have to ask me something so silly, Of course, I'm happy with you, I haven't been this happy in years. You're everything thing to me, I love you." 

"Then why do you want a job so bad? Let me take care of you? It's simple, you won't want for anything. You won't have any problems," 

"Levi, just because I get a job doesn't mean you can't take care of me, I'm still my own person Levi," I told him. 

"I know that. it's just you doing thing on your own, I'm not there...and I-" 

I took Levi's hand and leaned my head on his shoulder, "Levi, nothing is going to happen to me." I don't know for sure, but I sorta get the feeling that he was scared something else was going to happen to me. "I have to get some type of independent I've never had my own...But I'm not leaving you...I want to be with you, as long as you'll have me." 

Levi held my hand a bit tighter, "I'll always want you, don't worry." 

I smiled, "Then I guess we're good then." 

"Yeah, I guess...I'll help you find a job I might have something for you already, but only if it's what you really want to do, but just remember you don't have to work, so the moment, anything goes wrong you get tried. I'm just a call away." 

"I know Levi," I told Levi as I moved to start kissing him. "I know." 

After a while, Levi broke our kiss, "F/n?" 

"Yeah?" 

"Promise you won't leave again?" 

I sighed, "Yes, I promise." 

~~Later~~

"I get you haven't been with each other in a while, but Levi please give f/n some space," Kuchel told Levi with her hands on her hips.

I chuckled glancing at Levi how was leaning his head on my shoulders, he only looked at her and pouted. 

"F/n tell him you need to breathe and you can't be with him in your space 24/7," She shook her head. But I could tell she wasn't upset about it from the light smile that was on her face. 

"I am letting her breathe," Levi sighed saying as he moved over to set down next to me. 

I myself wasn't complaining. Being this close to Levi again was everything I could ever want. Being back in his arms, being able to love him freely. It was bliss; so I didn't mind when he wanted to be close to me even if he was just hanging there 

"The two of you are adorable as ever," Kuchel said smiling, "But you should have known better than to not call or come over all week!" 

"Sorry," I told her feeling a bit bad. 

"Tsk, you know Levi had to have her all to himself," Mikasa said walking into the kitchen.

"You know I think you just need more friends," Bella stepped in after her. "Think about it; Levi only hangs out with his girlfriends or Furlan. And since Furlan is halfway across the country he just hangs around F/n now." 

"She has a point, When does Levi hang around anyone else?" Mikasa added.

"Tch, I have friends," Levi told them.

"Sure," Mikasa rolled her eyes.

"You guys stop messing with Levi and help me with this," Kuchel said cutting some vegetables. 

"Can't I'm only cause I'm doing laundry," Mikasa said and hurried back out the kitchen. 

"Ugh, and I was helping her!" Bella said running out after here. 

Kuchel shook her head sighing, " The can't help cook, but I bet they'll eat more than anyone else, I swear I'm always the big red hen." 

"Tsk, it's the little red hen," Levi spoke up, "The big red hen is from Dora, the little red hen is the one you're talking about." 

Kuchel shook her head at him, "I wish my children weren't such smartasses." 

"We get it from you," Levi snapped back.

"You get it from your father," Kuchel told him. 

"Tch, I don't get anything from him." 

The tension from the two was starting to get bad once Kuchel had mentioned Levi's dad. "How about I help out Kuchel?" I stepped in and picked up a pot. I didn't want them arguing "What are you making anyway?" 

Kuchel and Levi glared at each other a little more, But then she turned to me, "F/n you don't have to help-" 

"I want too," I told her. I really did lord knows I could use a cooking lesson. Levi and I might be together again, but that doesn't mean let him do everything for me. I need to learn to do things on my own still. 

"If you insist." 

"How about F/n and I just make dinner, you go rest or something," Levi said standing up.

"Oh? Now you wanna help?" 

"Tsk, I didn't say I didn't want to help," Levi told her taking the knife out of her, "go relax." He basically pushed her out of the kitchen.

Kuchel took a step back, "You two know what you're doing?" 

"I do, F/n might burn something," Levi teased. 

I nudged him, "Don't be mean." 

Levi only smiled back at me. 

Before I could say anything back to him Kuchel started laughing while she was standing in the doorway, "What?" I asked her.

She shook her head, "The two of you, you're just so cute. You've always been. And I'm just so happy to see you've found each other again. All I've ever wanted was for you guys to be happy. And I just know watching the two of you together, you are. (Mom's name) Would be happy too." 

I smiled at her, "Aw Kuchel, you're going to make me cry." 

Kuchel sighed, "I didn't mean to get all choked up there, I'll go check on the girls," Then she walked out leaving Levi and me alone.

Soon as she was gone, Levi moved to where he was behind me and held me, I started to laugh, "Is this why you were trying to get her out of here?" 

"Yes." 

"Tsk, you're so immature, you said we'll cook, and I was actually looking forward 

"And don't-" Kuchel had walked back in the kitchen saying something, but stopped when she saw Levi kissing my neck. 

Levi stopped and looked at her. I could only put my face in my hands this was so embarrassing! 

"I was just coming in to tell you, not to smashing faces or anything else over my food. But I can see it's already too late," She shook her head, "I may be getting old Levi, but I'm not an idiot. I know you only pushed out of here to be with F/n, now that's fine and dandy, but try to keep it in your pants for a few hours/" Then Kuchel left out. 

"Yeah, Levi keep it in your pants for a few hours," I teased him back. But she did have a good point. As much as I did love making love with Levi. It was always ready to go, but then again I think I just blame that on how long we were apart. And it's not like I'm really complaining either. But a nice break is good.

"Tsk, shut up." 

I laughed, "Come on, let's just get dinner done." 

~~~Later~~~

Levi and I had pulled up to a model agency. Apparently, Levi had been having some calls from the guy to took our pictures that one time and he wanted to use me again or something. Either way, I was pretty excited about it. It was a nice easy job and it paid well. I still hadn't used all the money from the last check I got. 

"You sure you don't want me to go up with you?" Levi asked me for the 100th time.

"Yes, Levi." 

"F/n-" 

"When you moved out here, you got to do things on your own and made mistakes, I just want the same thing." 

"F/n you're being childish, I know what I'm talking about with these things," Levi said getting frustrated. But we had already been over this. I'm going to do this on my own as much as I could. I needed this. My withdraws have been less and less, and I just want to get more control in my life, and doing this alone is a great start. 

"Levi please let me go in and if I have a problem, I'll tell you to come in. But If I'm good for the first ten minutes then leave and don't come back until I call you," I told him. 

Levi didn't say anything for a moment, but then he sighed, "Fine." 

"Thank you," I told him kissing him on the cheek, then getting out of the car. This would be easy. And I'll be fine.

Levi pov

I watched F/n walking to the building. 

This was really hard, but she's right. I have to let her be on her own. I know I can't keep her held up to myself. But part of me really does start to think about what happened the last time I let her out of my sight. I know that bastard isn't here, but still, we're in L.A. anything could still happen. And the thought of anything else happening to her is enough to make me go crazy. 

But this is best for her. She needs this, and if anything I want to support her, so I sat in the car. Or at least I'll sit here until she's done. Maybe I could sneak in and watch her from the side. No doubt she'd be in hair and make up for a while. So that would be a good chance to go in and see what's going on. I won't interfere, I'd just be there watching the whole thing. 

I hope she isn't being asked a whole bunch of questions about me. I told her if anyone did ask anything just say she didn't know what they're talking about. All in all, I think she should be okay. It's not like people knew we were going to be at this photoshoot so we should be alright. 

Right now I was still sitting in the car. I was actually looking at some rings on this website I found. I'm really going to ask her. The sooner the better really. The more I think about it the more I get excited, Me and F/n actually married. To start a family with her? That's the thing I've wanted since I was a teenager. To do right by her, to have my own family. One I won't abandon. I just have to figure out how'll I'll ask her. F/n knows I'm not one for big gestures. I mean thinking about how I gave her the promise ring it was in my room. But this is bigger, I wonder what she'd really like? Maybe I could get Mikasa or Bella to find out? No, those idiots would slip out that I was proposing or something.

My phone started to ring taking me out of my thoughts. Was it F/n? I looked at it...it was Cira? What did she want? I was done with her, I even got all her shit out of the house. what else could she have to say? Do I even want to know? 

I contemplating it while the phone rang. 

I sighed I might as well, she'll just call back over and over again knowing her. "Yea?

"What were you busy with that whore? You can't answer you're the phone." 

I had to resist the urge to hang up on her right here, "What do you want Cira?"

"I need to talk to you, can we met up?" 

"You can talk now.' 

"Levi, this is important, I need to see you in person." 

"Not going to happen, If you don't say it now then it can't be that big of a deal." 

"Fine," She said in an angry voice, but she always sounds likes she's angry. I don't know what made me stay with her. I really had to be on something; nothing about our personality got along at all. "You might want to sit down for this one too," 

"Just spit it out," I told her getting annoyed. She was taking up too much time and F/n could call me.

"I'm pregnant and you're the father."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!!
> 
> Okay, so that's a thing now. I tried to make this chapter fluffy for the most part, but things ended up getting serious at the end. 
> 
> What will happen with reader and Levi know after this news tho? 
> 
> ((Also again I am so sorry for this chapter not coming out last weekend, I was having a lot of issues. lowkey still am but I wanted you all to have this!))
> 
> Again I hope you all liked this chapter <3 
> 
> xoxo


	53. Chapter 53

Your Pov

I sighed picking my bag up. That whole thing was exhausting, but damn was it fun! I don't know why I have so much fun posing for pictures. I guess it kinda reminds me of when I was a teenager and would just pose in the mirror for hours, but now I was going to get paid for it. Not to mention the people there was nice, they were all really helpful, and everything. I don't know if I'd want to do this as a living, but I do like this as a hobby. Who knows next time I might actually let Levi come in. 

I think I might have been a bit hard on him before, after all, if it wasn't for him I wouldn't have even had this gig. I'll be sure to show him the pictures soon as their out. I had already texted him saying I was ready to leave. I wonder what he was out doing while I was doing the shoot? Knowing him it was probably just sitting in the car, then again I bet he had some errands to run, we were in the house all last week. 

I got outside and sure enough, Levi was sitting in his car waiting for me. I got in already feeling excited to tell him about the shoot, "Levi, it was so much fun! Cold, but fun. They had so many different outfits for me to wear, look at my makeup I still have it own I feel so fancy," I giggled at him. 

But Levi had already started to drive off without saying anything. When I looked at him he had this serious expression on his face. Maybe he was upset I didn't let him come in. "Levi?" 

He didn't answer. 

"Leviiii," I sang his name out. 

He glanced at me, "Huh?" 

"The shoot was fun," I told him to make ideal conversation. But he didn't say anything again. 

I sighed, "I'm sorry I made you stay out here, but you know it does mean a lot to me that you listened and didn't come in." I told him truthfully. I honestly expected he would have walked in, but he kept his word and I was really happy he did this for me. All I want more than anything now is to have a bit of independence. And he was helping me with it, and by listening to me for staying out means he trusts me to do things to get better. 

"It's fine," Levi finally spoke up, "It's good you liked it."

I smiled, "Thank you, Levi. What were you doing while I was gone?" 

Levi didn't say anything.

"Levi?" I called out his name again. He was being very distant. 

"Sorry, it's nothing," Levi looked over at me once we reached a red light. Levi took my hand and brought it to his lips. "I was just thinking, and was lost in thought; I'm glad you had fun." 

I smiled at him, "Thanks Levi, I don't know why but I have this good feeling about this. Oh, by the way, no one bothered me about that gala thing. They were nice." 

Levi nodded, "That's good." 

"You sure you okay?" I asked him, "What's on your mind?" Levi was trying but his mind was clearly somewhere else.

Levi paused looking at me. It was like he wanted to say something to me but he fought himself against it. What was he hiding? "It's nothing," Levi finally said.

"You sure?" I couldn't help but ask. It was wasn't common for Levi to keep things to himself. He always told me everything, at least that's what I've always thought. But he's clearly hiding something right now, but maybe he has a good reason. 

"Yeah" Levi squeezed my hand to reassure me. "Er let's go get something to eat to celebrate.

I sighed, "Sounds like a plan." If he is keeping something from me it's probably for good reason. And Knowing Levi soon enough he'll tell me whatever it is, and knowing me I'm most likely being dramatic about it too. It could be another silly surprise he has for me or something. Whatever it is I think I've convinced myself not to be worried about it. It's Levi after all. 

Levi Pov

I couldn't tell her. 

I couldn't bring myself to tell F/n what Cira had just called me about. 

When she got in the car looking all happy and excited, I couldn't take that joy from her, I already know if I told her it would destroy her. But I can't keep something like this from her, not for long, but how the fuck am I supposed to tell her this? My mind keeps going back to all those years ago when she told me about Petra. I remember how scared she was I'd leave her. And I just now if she found out the same thing was happening again, but now-Shit--I don't know what it would do to her, with everything she's been through I don't know how she'd ever recover from this. Knowing F/n she'd think that was good enough reason to leave thinking she's a burden. 

My mind went back to what Cira had told me. She was pregnant, and I was the father. She says their no doubt I am the only one she's been with, and that she was keeping it, not to mention going public with it. I had convinced her that we needed to talk more privately before she did that. I needed to tell F/n first. I'd hate for her to find out any other way. But how the hell am I supposed to tell her this? How do I keep her from leaving? I don't know what I'm going to do about this either. I don't want to leave F/n--Hell I'm not going to leave F/n. I won't do that, but how am I supposed to be with her and raise a child? I don't want to be with Cira, but I have to be apart of their life. I won't be like my own dad, I won't abandon my children. And I know F/n knows this is how I feel...She knows, and she'll feel like she's stopping me from it if she's with me. I know that's exactly what she'll think, but I can't live my life without her. She has to know that. I can't let her out of my life again.

I glanced over at F/n, she's fine right now...I'm sure she knows something is wrong. 

I shook my head to myself. I want her too be-no I need her to be. I need her to be happy I need her to have fun and feel carefree before I fuck it all up. "What do you think about us taking a trip, just me and you?" I asked her. 

F/n frowned, "Just the two of us?" 

"Yeah, we haven't done anything before, and now we're together. I want to do something with you that we'll both remember." 

"Levi, I remember everything I've done with you," She told me. "But I get what you mean, what should we do?" 

"We can go anywhere you want." 

"Hmm, how about...Disney world?" 

"Disney world?" 

"Yeah, Levi it would be so fun! Have you ever been? Remember when we were kids we wanted to go so bad! We had that little jar we'd put our pennies in to save up," F/n's face lit up at the memory. 

"Yeah, I remember," I told her. I wish we could go back to those days, back when everything was simple. "Disney world it is." 

She smiled, "This is so exciting! Disney world! I can't wait!" F/n was beaming. It was something that was so rare a few months ago, but now it was becoming more and more frequent. I can't take that from her. 

We got to a little restaurant, and we were both about to get out of the car, but F/n stopped me, "Levi do you think it's a good idea for us to go in? I mean with all this stuff about the Gala..." 

"We'll be fine, besides we're together now. They're going to see you eventually." 

F/n smiled shyly and shook her head, "Okay." 

I just watched her move. And I can't help but hate myself. I was about to ruin this. The happiest we've both been in years, and I already fucked it up. Maybe it was a sign or something, bad shit keeps following us. I shook my head that wasn't it. F/n and I belonged together. There is no way in hell we don't. Whatever it is the both us are going to get through it. I know we are, we always do...So maybe I should just go ahead and tell her? 

"Are you coming?" 

F/n called after me. I nodded and started to walk up to her. 

She took my hand, "You' sure you're alright?" 

"Mmhmm," I hummed. 

"I love you," F/n spoke up. 

I looked back at her, "I love you too," More then she'd even know I'm sure. I told her kissing her hand. 

Your Pov

Okay, so I was officially suspicious of Levi.

He's been acting weird since Monday. I know there is something on his mind, and on top of that, he has been too nice. I know Levi is a good person at heart, but that has never stopped him from being mean and snappy. But he's just been less moody acting. He's been catering to me; asking me what I want, planning this trip. Which we're leaving out for today. Just doting on me, and it's nice, and I'm not complaining, but it just doesn't feel like him. I shook my head, I might just be overthinking this whole thing. Levi is pretty romantic when he wants to be so this could all be something he's planning. 

Right now he's in the shower and I'm cooking us something to eat before we leave. Just then the phone started to ring. I went to pick it up after I saw it was Kuchel. 

"Hey Kuchel," I answered.

"Hey sweetie, just checking on the two of you, you guys coming over today?" 

"Actually, no. Levi and I are going on a trip." 

"A trip? Just the two of you?" 

"Yeah-" 

"So the two of you are planning your own trips now?" 

"Well it was Levi's idea for just the two of us, but I'm sure if I asked you guys can come along too, sorry for not in-" 

"I'm joking F/n," Kuchel said. "The two of you have a good time, the two of you deserve to have a little romantic weekend." 

I laughed, "Oh, I guess you're right." 

"knowing Levi I bet he'd planned to propose or something cute like that on a trip. " 

My eyes went wide, "What?" 

"Oops, forget I said that. I'm sure he has something planned but I'm sure that wouldn't be it. He'd tell me first- at least I think." 

"Omg, Kuchel you think he's going to propose?" 

"I didn't say that-" 

"He's been doting on me all week! Do you think he'd propose at Disney world?" My mind was running everywhere. Why didn't I think of this before? Levi asking me to marry him? Am I even ready for that? Are we ready?

"Oi, who you talking too?" Levi came into the kitchen practically making me jump out of my skin. 

"I'll talk to you late, Kuchel," before she could say anything I hung up. Just the thought of Levi asking me to marry him had my nerves on edge. Why didn't I think of that before? it would explain a lot. I figured he had something he was planning, but marriage? This-This is insane!

"You okay?" Levi asked taking me out of my thoughts.

I shook my head, "Yeah, I'm fine. Good, better than fine. Great. Never been better. I am so fine it should be a crime," I laughed nervously. 

Levi raised an eyebrow at me, "What were you and my mom talking about?" 

I shook my head quickly, "Nothing." 

Levi clearly didn't believe me. 

"It wasn't anything," I said trying not to smile but failing miserably. "it wasn't anything she was just joking about you." 

"Mmhm," 

I'm serious," I told him still smiling. I just couldn't get the thought of marrying Levi out of my head, it was making me so damn happy. I never thought about it until now. At least not as something that could actually happen. I mean before now, he was with Cira, and before then I was so messed up, but I'm getting better now, and now all I can think about it all those years ago; it feels like a lifetime ago when we gave each other those promise rings. And here we are...After all that we're back together...Forever this time. I know I'd never give Levi up again, and I know he feels the same way. 

"What's with that dumb face your wearing?" Levi asked me. 

I shook my head and walked to him wrapping my arms around him in a hug, If he really was going to propose at Disney would that would be amazing, but even if he's not it's okay I still love him, I still want to be with him. Levi is my everything. I held him tighter, "I love you so much, Levi."

I could tell I caught him a bit off guard, but he held me tighter, "I love you too, F/n." 

I don't know how long we stayed like that, but it wasn't long enough. But at some point, we pulled away from each other. After all, we did have to leave to get on the plane. 

"You got everything?" Levi asked after he was done eating and was washing dishes while I was cleaning off the table. 

"Yeah," I told him. 

"Our ride to the airplane should be here in about an hour." 

I smiled widely, "I'm so excited. Have you been to Disney world since you've been famous? I just want to know what to expect. I think I'm most excited to see anything Mulan you know she's still my favorite. " 

"I told you no, I haven't," Levi told me ideally. "I think I want to see peter pan. That would be pretty cool." 

"So you're admitting your excited?" I teased him. 

"Duh, it's the happiest place on earth." He told me like it was obvious.

I rolled my eyes at him, "You were acting like you didn't want to the other day." 

"I don't know what you're talking about," He lied.

I shook my head Levi is such a butthead sometimes. 

"Anyway, I'm going to bring my things by the door, and Imma finish getting dressed." 

Levi hummed in my directions, and I left the room. 

I don't know I I'll be able to contain myself when we get there, but God, I am so excited! Ahh, This is going to be so much fun, Levi tries to act like he doesn't like these things but I know he's going to love this. 

Just as I was walking to my room the doorbell rung. Levi said the driver would be here in an hour so they were kinda early, I guess that's good. "I'll get it!" I called out to Levi. I walked to open the door expecting to see some guy but when I did, I can defiantly say I was pretty shocked. 

It was Cira. 

What was she doing here?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading!!
> 
> things are heating up!! what will Reader do when she finds out the truth? Should Levi had kept it from her? is there even a baby? so many questions :>
> 
> Thanks again for reading!! I hate this chapter was so short but I really wanted to get it out and have to go to work now, but I'll be working on the next chapter tonight when I get off. until then I hope you all enjoyed this chapter <3
> 
> xoxo


	54. Chapter 54

You Pov

I really wasn't expecting to see her of all people. I don't even know how to respond to her. What do I even say? What does she want? I looked over her and as usual, she looked gorgeous. I guess it comes with the territory of being a movie star. 

"What um- What can I do for you?" I asked her. This was awkward considering the last time I saw her what things were like. 

"Where is Levi?" She demanded. 

"Er," I still didn't know how to respond, "Come in let me-" Before I could finish inviting her in she pushed me to the side. 

"Levi!" she called out. I wanted to tell her to calm down, but part of me suddenly felt like I didn't have the right to say anything to her. In a way, I did take Levi from her. If he had never found me they would still be together right now. 

Suddenly Levi rushed into the room, "Cira? What are you doing here?" 

"Levi, she was at the door I let-" 

"As if you could invite me into my own house," Cira rolled her eyes, yeah she still doesn't like me. It's not like she has any reason too. 

"Cira, you need to leave," Levi told her in a serious voice. 

"Why?" Cira challenged him.

"Cira," Levi called her name again, "I swear to god." 

"Don't get your panties in a twist. I just came in to talk to you. I have nothing to say to the homewrecker." She glared at me. And the more she did the smaller I felt. 

Levi groaned, "Cira, let's talk outside." Levi turned back to me, "I'll be right back. Just-just finish getting ready." Levi then followed her out the front door to talk outside. What did she have to say to him? Was she trying to get him back? She can't have him I thought instantly.

But is it wrong of me to think like that? But Levi and I are together, he said it himself. He loves me. Me more than anything else, and that's how I feel about him, so Cira can't have Levi back. I was about to go tell her that. I don't know where his confidence came from but she needs to know that I am here and I'm not going anywhere. But right before I opened the door I thought about it. Levi wouldn't leave me for her. I shouldn't even be worried. he loves me I have nothing to worry about. So I should just go finish getting ready. I mean I trust Levi. 

I sighed and was about to walk away but I couldn't help but hear a little bit of mumbling. She might be trying to convince him to go back with her, but he won't listen. Maybe he's telling her off. 

I listened to them just a bit, but I couldn't really hear them, so I stepped closer and started to listen to what they were talking about.

Levi Pov

"Why the fuck are you here," 

"You said we'd talk," She told me.

"That didn't mean here though," I snapped at her. 

"Why are you trying to hide this Levi? You don't want everyone to know that you knocked me up and left me for that whore." 

She was so frustrating, "That's not how anything went down and you know it." 

"I don't know what I know, but I figured I'd come by and tell you what's about to happen." 

"Excuse me-" 

"This whole thing you have with her is about to be over," Cira said pointing at the house, "I'm moving back in and you're sending her away." 

I don't know what I saw in her all those years, but she had some nerve thinking she could come in here and tell me what she thought I was going to do. "Cira, I don't know what you think was going to happen, but I'm not leaving F/n for you, baby or not." 

"Pfft," Cira rolled her eyes, "So you'd leave me to raise my baby- our baby by myself?" 

I know it was a hard choice and I'd hate to have a child and not be in their life fulltime. But I can't leave F/n. Not right now. Not ever, I made that discussion. I will keep her in my life, and we'll stay together, but that didn't mean I wasn't going to be out of my child's life either. We'll figure this out but I'll figure it out with F/n. I still want us to go on this trip, and have her be carefree when we get back I'll tell F/n everything. 

"You won't raise anyone by yourself," I started to tell Cira. I didn't want her getting the wrong idea, "but I don't want to be with you, I want to be with F/n. Respect that Cira. I will support you in this, I never said I wouldn't but I won't be leaving F/n for you. I don't know what you thought was going to happen but I've already decided what I'm going to do about this."

Cira glared at me, "I can't believe you." 

"Cira, I'm sorry it has to be this way, but it is what it is." 

Cira just crossed her arms, "I don't know what she put into your head, but I know the real you this isn't you. You wouldn't let your own child grow up without a dad." 

"No Cira I'm thinking clearly. I love F/n." 

"More than your own child?" 

"I don't even know if it's mine If I'm being honest with you." 

Cira gasped. I realize that was harsh, I and Know I'll regret it if it turns out to be mine, but Cira is messy. I can only trust her as far as I can throw her, and I can't throw her that far. "Listen, Cira now isn't even a good time to be talking about this. I'll call you when we can talk about this further." 

"I can't believe you," Cira said shaking her head, But without saying anything else she stormed off.

I sighed, I should be happy, I thought she'd be more trouble than that, but I guess she got the message. Though I'm sure I'll have more problems with her in the future. But the next time I talk to her about this, I want F/n to be in the conversation too, this is going to affect her too. I just hope it won't be too bad for her when I do tell her. I know she'll over think, but If we sit down and talk about it I'm sure I'll calm her down so she doesn't think she's a problem. I walked back in the house and saw F/n still standing in the room. 

"Cira left," I started to tell her but she turned around and I saw the tears in her eyes instantly alarming me. "Whats-" 

"She's pregnant?" 

Your Pov

I couldn't believe what I just herd. 

Cira was pregnant. 

At least that's what I think I heard, but I didn't want to believe it. Levi would have told me if he knew, but it sounded like he knew from the way he was talking to her, I think. I shook my head nothing was clear. I didn't hear that right. I was hearing things. I looked at Levi who was just standing there. 

"Is she?" I asked him again. 

"F/n you have to understand-" 

"Oh, My God," I leaned against the sofa. He didn't deny it so that it was true. "How long have you know?" I asked him. 

"F/n listen to me-" 

"How long have you known Levi!" I asked him again.

"For about a week." 

"A week," I gasped. "A week?" He's known that long why hasn't he mentioned it. This is important this is something he should have told me before now. Why wouldn't he tell me? "Why Levi? I just don't understand why wouldn't you tell me this?" 

Levi walked closer to me, but I stepped back. Levi stopped walking towards me sighing, "I was going to tell you F/n. You have to believe that I was. That isn't the type of thing I'd keep from you." 

"It's been a whole week Levi! How am I supposed to believe you?" There were so many things going through my head. I was sad, I was angry. I was just frustrated I didn't know what to think. 

"I was going to tell you after we got back from the trip." 

The trip..."So what the fuck was this trip? Was it a distraction?" I was so confused. He suggested! Why would he do that? I couldn't help but cry, "Why didn't you don't tell me!" 

"Because I knew you'd react like this," Levi said walking closer to me again. "I didn't want to tell you and you get worked up F/n, and start overthinking." 

I was breathing heavy, "I don't understand Levi, of course, I'd get worked up! You're going to be a father!" That's what he's always wanted. He's always wanted a family. And now he has a chance to have one...even if I'm not in it. 

The realization dawned on me. He'll start a family without me...with Cira. Was the- The trip was like a last little thing before a goodbye. And to think I thought he was going to propose, "You want to be with her... " I said in a small voice. 

"What? No-" Levi grabbed me and made me look at him, "I want to be with you. No one else." 

I shook my head, "Levi you don't have to lie. I know you. You've wanted a family...you've always have. You've always wanted to better than your dad. You can't lie about this." 

"Listen," Levi shook his head, "You're right I did. But things are different now-" 

"No, they are not." 

"Shut up and listen." Levi cut me off. "You, You are the most important person in my life." 

I knew he wasn't thinking this through a child will change everything. "That will change with a child Levi." 

"It might, but at the end of the day the person I want to spend the rest of my life is you F/n." 

"That's not the family you dreamed of you want to be with the mother of your child-" 

"Damnit, F/n I want to be with you." 

He wasn't listening to himself. I know as soon as that baby is born it's going to be the only thing he'll live for and he'll want to be with Cira, that's what he'll want. And with me in a picture, it will only cause problems. And I can't be apart of that...I started to shake my head. "Levi I know you-" 

"Marry me." 

"What?" 

Levi was still holding me by my arms looking down at me, "Marry me. I'm proving to you I don't want Cira, I don't want anyone else. I get it a child will make things difficult But if you're by my side it will be alright. I can't imagine my life with anyone else F/n." 

I didn't know what to say, "Levi I-" 

"I get it. Things are shit right now, but we need each other, I was made for you like you were made for me. I love you. Marry me F/n please," Levi got down on his knee. 

I started to cry again, I was so confused. I wanted to say yes. Everything in me wanted to say yes, but was it right? What about Cira? What about their child? 

"F/n you're overthinking this," Levi told me. 

He was right, but shouldn't one of us be thinking this through?

"F/n?" 

I shook my head, What the hell I guess? "Yes, Levi I'll marry you." 

Levi looked at me like he was trying to see if I really meant it. I still had tears in my eyes and was pouting. "Yes, Levi I'll marry you," I told him again." 

Levi smiled at me and stood up and kissed me. I kissed him back, then I hugged him. But I couldn't help but think. This is supposed to be a happy moment but it was just so...it was just so much that felt wrong about it. 

I mean I want to be with Levi, I don't want to leave him for any reason...but this feels wrong...How was he not seeing this? 

Levi hadn't let go of me yet, but he whispered in my ear, "We're going to figure this out, I promise."

I really hope we could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> Welp, the cat is out of the bag, but things still feel off for reader...will she go through with the wedding? or will her doubt be too much for their relationship?
> 
> This feels like a short chapter to me, but I promise the next few chapters will be longer! ((we're getting close to the end of this story pretty soon actually, If the universe likes me enough I'd say in the next 6 chapters but then again who knows))
> 
> Please leave a kudo of a comment <3
> 
> xoxo


	55. Chapter 55

Your Pov

"This is a mess," Kuchel ran her hands through her hair. 

"This is what happens when you put your dick in crazy," Mikasa shook her head. 

I was over Kuchel's house since Levi was out filming and didn't want me alone. While I was here I told Kuchel and Mikasa everything that had happened the other day. And they were right this was a mess. I mean I'm still not sure how I feel about this whole thing. After we talked a bit more the other day we decided we didn't want to take the trip, and even though we're going to get married now I don't know what to do. We haven't even really talked since then. Nothing has been the same...there's just this heavy air between us. 

"What do you guys think I should do?" I asked them at a lost. "I mean I want to marry Levi, but with this...this is just something I have no idea how to handle. I want to be with him, But I know Levi. And I know what having a child means to him, even if he doesn't. "He's going to have a baby I know he wants one and the moment a child comes into the picture...what does that mean for me...us I just know we're not going to make it from something like this." 

"Don't say that," Kuchel said. She reached out and took my hand, "Levi loves you. You know that he'll always love you. Yes, I child does change things but he won't just forget you." 

"That's all easy to say." 

"If he was going to forget about you, he wouldn't have asked you to marry him," MIksas added. 

"I know he feels this way now, but-" 

"Don't worry about later." Kuchel cut me off, "Just work with him. Talk to him. You have to be open with each other if this is going to work out sweetie." 

I just nodded. I mean she's right, but it's easier said than done. 

"On a better note, you two are finally going to get married? Aren't you happy about that?" Mikasa suggested.

I gave her a weak smile, no matter how much I wanted to be excited about that I just couldn't get there. I wonder if this is a sign. "Yeah, I mean it's nice..." 

"F/n do you want to get married to Levi?" Kuchel asked me.

"Yes," I told her nodding my head, that was one thing I've always wanted more than anything. 

Kuchel and Mikasa seemed to let this sink in. They seemed at a loss as much as I was, and it hurt. 

This was supposed to be a happy moment. But it wasn't. This was the thing I've waited most of my life for I've wanted this forever, but now It was ruined something that was supposed to be simple was now so fucking complicated. 

"Wanna go out and look at wedding stuff? Maybe that will make you feel better?" Kuchel suggested. 

I nodded. I didn't want them to keep thinking there was something wrong with me. I should at least try and act like I'm happy. 

"Shit," Mikasa said out of nowhere. 

"Language please Mikasa," Kuchel said cutting her eyes at her daughter making me smile a bit. It was nice to see their mother and daughter relationship. Sometimes watching them I can't help but wonder what me and my mom would be like now if she were still alive. What would she even say to this whole thing...but then again if she were alive we wouldn't be in this situation. Because I would have never started talking to Samuel, and we would have never been talking at that party, and I would have never left Levi. 

But who knows...

I looked over at Mikasa and Kuchel looking over at her phone.

"What is it?" 

They both looked up at me, with this uneasy look in their eyes. 

What now?

Levi Pov

I was just leaving the studio, I turned in my phone hoping F/n had texted me or called anything. 

But she didn't. 

I sighed, since the other day..things have been so awkward. She's been keeping to herself, it's not like she wants too either, like she's been sad. And I don't know what to tell her. I want to explain that whatever she's afraid of it won't happen. Of course, I'll love my child but I won't abandon her. I still want a family with her. If I didn't I wouldn't have asked her to marry me. I know she said yes, but I don't even know if she means it anymore...And I hate that. If it was any other time I know it wouldn't have been a problem, but shit I hate that it happened this way. We're supposed to be happier than this. 

My phone started to ring. 

I looked at my screen in the car, it was my manager. I had noticed I had missed a call from him and my agent and publicist when I turned on my phone but I wasn't too concerned with them right now. I just want to fix this whole thing with F/n. 

I went ahead and answered it, "What's up." 

"Don't what's up to me Levi, what are you doing out here?" He yelled at me.

"Tsk, I don't know what you're talking about. Don't call me accusing me of shit," 

"Have you not seen all the headlines? Cira is pregnant? And you left her for that girl you've been hanging out with who's a prostitute?"

I hit the brakes on accented once Richard said that "What the fuck?" 

"That's mine line, you want to tell me what the fuck you're doing? You know what I don't care. Whatever shit you got going on get it together. I need you to come out with a statement-" 

"Who the fuck said all that?" 

"Who else? Cira. She had this interview on some podcast this morning and it's been everywhere since. All I know is you need to fix this shit. I've got too much riding on you right now to be messing up your career. If you got a whore problem we can fix it, we'll just-" 

I was getting angrier the more he was talking. Cira was taking this too far. "Shut up Rich. Cira is lying. Yes, she pregnant but I didn't leave her for F/n." 

"I don't care, Levi, right now all I care about is getting your image better, drop the whore right now get back with Cira show people you're a family man-" 

"You don't know shit you're talking about. F/n's not a fucking whore so I'd watch how you talk about her." 

"Levi I'm not trying to get into the details with you, I get it's your life, but if you want to keep getting jobs in this town you need to clean it the fuck up," Then he hung up.

I hit the wheel getting frustrated. What the fuck was wrong with Cira. Was she just that vengeful? How did she even think this was going to work to make me want to get back with her? And what about F/n? 

Shit! 

Has she found out about this yet? I know she was with my mom today. But if it's everywhere there's no doubt she's seen it. What the fuck am I supposed to do now? If they're really out here saying all this shit about her what will that make her think? It's not like we're doing all that well already. 

The longer it took me in this traffic the more and more frustrated I was getting. She'll overthink this. She'll think she doesn't need to stay in my life. She'll think this marriage is a bad idea. She'll think she's helping me by getting out of my life. I just know that's how she thinks. She thinks she'll be protecting me by leaving me. 

And that can't be further from the truth.

Your Pov

"All I'm saying is Ackerman is stupid. It's just like a man." 

"Yeah, I mean it's one thing if you have some random chick, but he had fucking Cira Nikcam! That's a bad bitch, And he'd just leave her for what? Some girl off the street." 

"He won't know what he has till she's gone," 

"But you know I never thought him as a player like that He always has the air about him like he was a family man...Like he stays away from the drama." 

"Can't be that true." 

"Okay, but let's talk about this girl though. Apparently, from what Cira said in that interview, she's this hooker that Levi met back on one of his trips a few months: ago. And he decided to play pretty woman with her." 

"Hahaha, but you know I'm not mad at her if a hot celebrity came to my club and I was hoeing it up I'd jump on that dick too." 

"And Look, she's been enjoying it too. Being at photoshoots and shit. She's living the life-" 

Mikasa turned off the tv. 

"We shouldn't be watching that." 

She looked at me, "I'm sorry. We all know none of that's true." 

But all I could do was cry silently to myself. This was a mess. Mikasa had shown me some interview Cira did and told everyone she was pregnant with Levi's baby. And that he basically picked me up a few months ago and I'm a whore that he's been cheating on her with...She wasn't even that far off though. 

How could I have been so stupid? I really am just a whore he picked up. Yes, we have our history, but that's exactly what it is history. It was a sigh. Everything with us always goes wrong. No matter how much we try to just move on something else happens. Something is always going to happen. And this just feels like too much now. Cause the eyes of the whole world are on us. There own him. Levi has so much good going for him, and me- everything about me just holds him down. And I don't- I can't hurt him like this. Not just his fame but his chance at Family too. 

"F/n it will be alright." 

I shook my head, it wasn't though. Nothing was ever going to be alright not now, not ever. There will always be something. 

"Levi!" 

I head Kuchel call his name. 

I looked over the couch to see he had just walked in. Levi walked to me. "F/n I heard Cira had an interview. This changes nothing." 

"Levi, it changes everything," I told him. How could he say this?

"It doesn't. I'm still marrying you F/n. I'm still with you. I don't care what anyone says about you or me." 

Hearing him say this only made me angry. "Levi I care! I care what the world says about you! You've had your life set. Think about it. If you don't have your job how will you maintain this life you have? Huh? Levi, I am only going to ruin you think of yourself! Think of your Family." 

"You are my family F/n-" 

"No! I'm not! Them!" I pointed at Mikasa and Kuchel, "They are your Family. Everything you've worked for you did it for them. You did it for yourself, you haven't even seen me in years I will not come back into your life and fuck everything up I won't do that Levi! Think of your child!" 

"You're not!" Levi was getting closer to me, and I could tell he was getting angry. "F/n, I don't care what the world says I don't even know if the child is fucking mine. I just want you." 

"You are not thinking Levi, I know you. If there is anyone I know it's you, and I know how you think. It's fine now, but just wait till you see that child. You're only saying this now because I'm here, and you don't things though when I'm here Levi you just don't." 

"Why can't you see I just want you in my life. My life isn't right if you're not in it." 

"It's not right with me in it." 

"That's not true," 

It hurt, but it was true. 

Before I knew it Levi had in me in his arms, I tried to fight him, but he wouldn't let me go, "We both know that isn't true." 

"It is. when have things ever when right with us together?" 

"Shit happens. You know it does, but you're everything to me I can't live without you." 

"You're only saying that now." 

"I'm saying that now and forever, just don't' leave me, don't leave me again" 

I wanted to stay with him, I want to be with him forever. I never want to leave him. But I don't know how I can...

"We'll work this out. I promise we'll work this out. Believe me, just don't go," 

Maybe...just maybe things will be okay? I don't want to leave. I want to be with him. I nodded, "I want to be with you Levi," 

Levi kissed me, "Then don't go." 

I was still crying, "I won't." 

Levi Pov

We had ended up getting home late, and it didn't help that right outside my house gates there was a whole bunch of press. But I keep convincing F/n not to leave. I don't know what I'd do if she left. 

This was a shit show. I sighed, but I'll fix this. I looked over at F/n she had gone asleep. 

I told her I'd call Cira over in the morning. I needed to talk to her, I needed to her to set this shirt straight. I was beyond tired of her shit. I had to put an end to this. I won't let her keep hurting F/n like this. She wasn't going to keep bullying F/n. 

I shouldn't have let it get this far. I should have never even gotten with Cira. I should have fought harder for F/n back then. I should have never come out here to Hollywood. Everything in my life that I've done up to this point has been a mistake. When (Moms name) dies I should have stayed. I should have had her come out here with me then. I should have never left her. 

I've fucked up so much with her, and it's like that's all I do. 

But I need her in my life. I don't know what I'd do if she left me again. 

I looked down at her laying there, her eyes were open now. 

"You alright?" 

She just nodded.

"You want something?" 

She shook her head. 

I sighed and laid down next to her, "I promise everything will be alright. In the morning, I'll call Cira over and I will get this shit all cleared up. I'll protect you from the whole world, everything is going to be alright." I kissed her had, but F/n pulled it away. She looked sad still. 

"Don't make promises you can't keep," She said with glossed over eyes. 

I couldn't say anything to her after that. She sounded just like her mother....not to mention It seems like every time I promised her something, it would go into flames. 

~Later~

F/n still was still upset. I'm not going to mess with her though. 

I got up early to make her something to eat, she had just got out of the shower and was sitting down in the kitchen with me. I sat across from her on the island. She hadn't said anything to me, and it was killing me. I wanted to know what she was thinking. What was going through that head of hers? is she thinking of leaving? But even if she leaves where will she go? I'm all she has. Will she stay with my mom or Mikasa. That wouldn't be so bad. Even if she stays with Bella for a bit would be fine. I just don't want her alone. 

She just might need some space for a while, and I'm okay with that, she just needs family in her life right now. 

"Levi," F/n finally said something to me since last night.

I looked over at her, her expression wasn't clear, "Levi you got your shirt inside out." 

"Huh?" 

She pointed at my shirt. I looked down at it and sure enough, it was. "Oh. I hadn't noticed." 

She smiled for the first time in forever, "You okay? That's not a very Levi thing to do." 

I shook my head, "My head has been everywhere." 

"I know the feeling, although I can still put my shirt on right," She teased. 

I smiled at her. She was trying to break the ice. We haven't really had an ideal conversation for a while now. "Wanna watch a movie later?" 

"That sounds good. Now that I think about it, didn't you mention you had a recording of Heathers we did all those years ago?" 

"Yeah, I do, you wanna watch that?" 

She smiled nodding her head, "Yeah, I'd like that," 

"You um...when were you going to call Cira?" 

"I can call her right now if you want?" 

She shifted in her seat, "Or we can wait a while?" I could tell she wasn't ready. 

"Okay." 

We ate in a more comfortable silence after that. We had started to clean up. I'm starting to think it would be a better idea for F/n and me to just spend this day together forget about everyone else for a while. We can go back to all this other shit tomorrow today just enjoy each other. 

"Leviiii," She sang my name. "We're out of soap." 

"And popcorn," I added closing the cabinet. "I have been meaning to take a trip to the store." 

She huffed out a chuckle, "We've been slacking." 

"Tsk, can you blame us?" 

"You wanna take a quick trip?" 

"How about I go and come right back, I don't want to make a career out of being out the house all day.

"Sounds good. I'll stay and pick out the line up of movies?" 

"Sounds like a plan." 

I walked over to her and kissed her, "I'll be right back, I love you." 

F/n smiled warmly at me, "I love you too." 

Your Pov

I watched Levi walk out. Wait did he even fix his shirt? I laughed to myself. Oh well, maybe he'll figure it out. 

We'll work this out. 

That's what I have to keep telling myself. 

If I don't tell myself that I'll keep thinking the worst, but when it comes down to it. I want Levi. I don't want to leave him. I want to stay in his life, no matter what. So maybe I should believe him when he says everything is going to be alright. 

I just have to believe that we'll work it out. This too shall pass, nothing stays the same even our problems. 

I like that Levi got the idea for us to just be together today. It will be the first time in forever, so I'm grateful. Tomorrow we can deal with the world today it will just be me and him I have finished up the last little stuff in the kitchen and was about to head upstairs to pick out some movies. I was pretty excited to see that old Heather musical. I laughed to myself. It was our first kiss...well the first before we actually got together. I was so nervous, but when I was singing it felt so right. It was always so right whenever I was with him...even back then. 

Just then the doorbell rung. 

Did he forget something? 

I wasn't thinking about it but I went ahead and opened the door, but once again it was Cira. 

Why was she here again?

"Cira," I gasped. But I didn't feel like this. I've done so much crying for the last few days I just want some Goddamn peace. "Levi isn't here." 

"I'm not here for him right now." She told me. 

"Then why are you here?" 

"I wanted to talk to you." 

"About what?" 

"Let me in let's talk." 

"I don't think that's a good idea." 

"I promise, it will be worth your wild." 

I sighed, "No offense, But I don't have much to talk to you about Cira. Since I've met you I know you haven't like me. And you've been fighting with me this whole time. And I get it. I wouldn't like me either if I was you. But more than once you've gone too far." I was telling Cira what was on my mind. I know it might not be my place to talk to her like this, but If this does work out and she and Levi do have a baby, I'll be in that child's life just as much as him...And I would love any child of Levi's like I'd love my own. But she has to respect me too. "I love Levi, and Levi loves me. He chose me. Now with this baby coming, I know things will be complicated. And I won't ever come between Levi and his own child. But you have to respect me. And all this stuff about calling me a whore or that I stole Levi needs to stop." 

Cira just stared at me, "You're really funny." 

"Cira this isn't a debate. This is the way things are going to go." I put my foot down.

Cira rolled her eyes, "Anyway," She pushed me aside walking into the house. What was wrong with her?

"Cira, this is uncalled for!" I yelled at her. 

"Listen here bitch," She snapped at me. "I've tolerated you long enough, you've come up here and you ruined a lot of shit for me. I've had to make up all types of stories to get you out of the picture and none of them worked then on top of that I get pregnant and you're still all he can fucking think about. It's annoying as shit." 

"Cira I think you should go." 

She shook her, head, "No, I think you should. And now I got just the thing to get you out the picture." 

I sighed, she sounded crazy, hell she was crazy. And I won't Levi for because of some crazy woman, "I'm not leaving Levi, Cira."

"Oh, you will." 

"I won't," 

"So you're saying you won't leave for no reason?" 

"Yes." 

"Even if I paid you." 

I was getting angry, who did she think she was, "Get out of here Cira." 

She rolled her eyes at me, "Like I said I won't be leaving today, you will are." 

I walked closer to her, "I'm not going anywhere." 

"Shit, really? And to think I came all this way to bring you back home." 

I heard a voice behind me and froze. 

It couldn't be. 

How did he? It wasn't, it wasn't-She wouldn't- How could she have even known him. It wasn't. I was dreaming. 

"You not even going to say hello?" 

I was dreaming, I was imagining things. it. I didn't want to look, but I couldn't keep my eyes away. I turned around and saw him. 

It was Samuel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> Samuels back's and that brings up a whole new set of problems what will reader do now? Will she go back with him? will she stay with Levi has Cira finally gotten what she wanted? 
> 
> Again thanks for reading! You guys are the best! <3 I'd love you hear your opinions on the story it's so much fun reading what you all say. Anyway thanks again for reading. 
> 
> Xoxo

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> Hope you guys enjoyed! Tell me what you think of it so far I'd love to know :)
> 
> xoxo


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